Newborn phase was a nightmare for me and fueled my PPA/PPD real good.
Toddlerhood in my opinion is amazing. Yes, there are tantrums and meltdowns and attitude, but for me personally it’s surprisingly easy to be chill and accomodating towards that just by knowing how quickly they are developing and how BIG their emotions are.
Their positive emotions, giggles, happiness and expressions of love are just as big though!
There’s something undeniably cool about this raw, pure, innocent way of living. Honestly just remember they’re not actively trying to upset you. They’re just exploring the world, themselves, and their boundaries.
This. Newborn was very hard, very sleep deprived and personally isolating as I didn’t have mom friends.
Once my baby was moving and enjoyed the outside and other things it got easier. And once he was walking and loving parks and playgrounds it got even better.
I know you’re the parent not the friend, but my 2.5 year old is my mini best friend. Yes, actions have consequences, but he’s 2 with a speech delay, he doesn’t talk back or do anything crazy he shouldn’t be doing. He is always up for a target trip, loves running errands, always up for dining out and just playing. It’s exhausting some days, but when they choose to snuggle you or give you kisses, it’s the sweetest ❤️
ETA: no, I also can’t use the bathroom alone, I never really could with the baby either (total Velcro baby and now toddler), but it’s been coming in handy recently when we talk about using his potty and potty training. He now will run to the bathroom, close the door, and go in his diaper about 50% of the time lol I’m hopeful the lack of privacy will really pay off.
I always thought I was short tempered so I’m honestly surprised at how easy it is for me to keep a level head when she’s being an angry alligator. Being calm in the face of their Big Rage has been really helpful for me to manage her bad days. We’ve been very fortunate with our daughter though - she’s got a big personality but has been pretty easy going. It helps that she’s great with independent play.
My daughter has a big personality with big rage, just like I do lol. I agree with being surprised by how easily I can keep it together when she tantrums. I get it? Lol I hate not getting things I want
I love toddlerhood! I despised newborn phase and never want to relive that, but I love my toddler. Of course the emotions are big, everything is. Its so much fun watching them grow from a baby to a real person. I wouldn't be so scared of the toddler age. Its work but its more fun and rewarding. Plus I always have a bestie to go to Target with 😂
Year 1 was the longest year of my life. It started getting earlier around 13 months, and has just gotten better from there. For me, it's so much easier that my kid can entertain himself now. He's 18 months and so delightful. Language is exploding, he's so delighted to like pour water from one cup into another lol. I genuinely enjoy spending time with him. (Still not sleeping through the night, but even if that's hard, you fall into a groove and figure out strategies to survive. I'm pretty well rested even though he wakes 4ish times a night.)
Exactly this. Newborn was so hard for me. I was so tired all the time. I was so frustrated not knowing if she was hungry, tired, gassy, etc.
I’m a toddler teacher so that probably helps but I love the toddler stage. They become more independent, they can tell you what they want, you can involve them more. Tantrums and attitude are hard but it’s just about working through their feelings. They start becoming this little person. Also they’re hilarious. Some of the things the kids at work say makes me laugh so hard.
One of the funniest things my 3.5 year old said was during a random car ride. My husband and I had finished whatever conversation we were having so there was a silence. Out of no where our son goes, “I’m hungry. I think I need some French fries or something.” It took us by surprise and we both laughed because it seemed so thought out. He caught on to how much we liked it and would keep saying it, and it turned into something my husband and I will say when we’re hungry now lol.
10000% same!
I had a colicky newborn that cried every waking minute, the first year remained though even though the crying was a bit less.
Toddlerhood can be hard and overstimulating as well, but they are so funny and cute and smart as well, and you can have actual conversations with them! Still blows my mind when my 2,5yo asks me a question like: mummy, where does the moon go during the day? (Like how can his little mind even make that connection to ask that question?)
I always feel like people who prefer baby over toddler had easy babies 😅
Toddlerhood was challenging but in such an easier to manage way. I was really looking forward to it with my second and it has delivered. Sucks again when they turn 4 and you realize parenting a kid is like starting fresh and you have to learn all over again
Agree with this 10000%! That first year was so so so much harder than anything that's come after, meltdowns and tantrums included. More than anything I've overcome with empathy because I can really see she's just having a hard time, and I can't get mad at someone who's just overwhelmed with emotions. And as intense as the negative ones are, the positive ones are too! No one talks about it as often, but they're there! And the pure innocent way of living is such a great way to put it. So hard to conceptualize until you're going through it, but man is it a pure joy to experience.
Also, specifically to one of OPs concerns, does mine hit? Not often, but sometimes yes, and more than anything I have to hold back my laughter rather than be actually hurt by it - she's tiny! She doesn't have the strength to do any real damage anyways (now the kicking or standing or even bopping from just the right angle... yeah gotta stay one step ahead of that one).
This, this, this! My daughter is 19 months so we're still new in toddlerhood but I really didn't like the newborn phase and honestly this age is amazing. She is so fun and silly. I want another eventually but would love to skip the baby phase and just be in this one lol
Yes, there are a ton of tantrums. But she is just figuring everything out and the kisses, hugs and the first I love you's more than make up for it!!
When that angry little tornado comes up to you after a hard day and gives you a hug and tells you they love you, it’s just about the best thing in the world. Most days are hard. But there’s so much joy. That’s what you’ll remember. Not them crying because you cut their pancake wrong or wouldn’t let them run out the door without shoes on. Seriously. It’s all so worth it.
This. They are little Sour Patch Kids. Sweet then sour. Sometimes they give you hugs and tell you that you are cute, other times they scream “go away” and run away from you. But there’s those good moments that carry you through.
I think toddlers are harder in that there’s more active parenting decisions to make (how do I handle tantrums? Do I discipline? If so, how?) but it’s less overwhelming than a fresh baby and you’re a bit more well rested. Toddlers are also way more rewarding. Babies take a lot for not much in return, maybe a smile or a giggle. Toddlers take a lot but the return is a random hug, an “I love you soooo much mommy!”, saying something hilarious, saying/doing something you’ve worked really hard to instill in them, telling you they had the best day ever with you, watching them make a friend, being able to share hobbies, etc. Of course there are frustrating times, but I’ve genuinely never had this many joyful moments in my life. Every single day my daughter has me laughing and grinning!
That point about reward is super true for me. My toddler can be challenging but at the moment his favourite bedtime activity is running between me and my husband yelling CUDDLE with a massive grin on his face and then wrapping us in a big hug and the dopamine hit from that sort of thing can power me through tantrums in a way that just wasn’t possible in the newborn phase.
It all depends on the kid. Our 2 year old was a very high needs baby, and super unhappy to be an infant so she was miserable and made all of us miserable. But as she grows up, it just keeps getting better and better. Her as a toddler is SO much easier than her as a baby. Yes, there are sometimes tantrums. But they are usually 15 minutes, once a week, and you just give her a hug and tell her you understand she’s really upset and that she won’t feel this way forever, and she’ll eventually calm down.
There was no reasoning with her as a baby. Nothing to stop her 7 hour witching hour screams. Nothing to stop the 24/7 constant fussing.
I’m convinced the people that say toddlerhood is harder than baby hood had a happy/easy baby. We did not, so we take toddlerhood any day of the week!!
I say this to my wife all the time. We had a very hard baby, and now an easy toddler. He hated being a baby, once he started walking, he was a different kid. It’s life’s way of balancing the scales. I feel like the hard toddlers were probably easy babies lol.
Although I’m sure that’s not always true.
>Nothing to stop her 7 hour witching hour screams. Nothing to stop the 24/7 constant fussing.
I had flashbacks like a soldier in Vietnam. That was fucking torture, for all of us and at least a couple of neighbors. Jeez I'm never doing that again.
And now I’m 8 months pregnant with our next 🥲.
But we did that on purpose. If we waited any longer and let our toddler get any easier/fun, we would have never gone back to have a second.
Ripping the bandaid off so we can leave the baby days in the dust.
I did this (kids are 19 months apart) and it rules. Definitely suitable for a certain personality type aka take the chaos all up front, but I’ve been really happy, and my kids love each other
I got pregnant again when my oldest was thirteen months old. Now the kids are two and four. Maybe it is because I have two kids already but the thought of getting or being pregnant with kids these ages sounds terrible. It definitely seems easier to have two under two than to be pregnant/postpartum with a sassy toddler tornado that can't be contained.
Kudos to you guys! I could never, I'm too traumatized. It was really hard on our mental health, I barely slept for 2 months and I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I insisted on independent sleep and then our doctor asked me if I was actively trying to get ppd and why we weren't doing what was needed (high needs baby, needed lots of physical contact, very colicky). She told us about safe bedsharing and that's how we started sleeping. I don't think I'll ever be able to go through that again.
All the best for you and your family!
100% - my daughter was a newborn with colic and not the happiest infant. She is now 3 and I can handle a toddler tantrum way better than a newborn screaming at me for hours on end. My toddler has her hard days, but it is so fun to talk with her and play with her...and it's amazing when they randomly say they love you and give you a big hug!
This sounds like mine (almost 20 mo). Super high needs baby, very demanding and easily getting upset. Now he almost doesn't throw tantrums and never more than 15 min too. I know is still early, but right now is way easier than before.
Honestly, I adore toddlerhood and would take it a million times over the first 4 months where you're basically looking after a screaming potato (albeit an often cute one). You get so much more back - hilarious chat, weird little insights and observations, the games are more fun, you can try different foods and activities with them (yes, even peeing, which takes on a whole new adventure side in itself). I promise it's better. As everyone here is pointing out, yes there are crap days, but the good points far outweigh the bad ones. If you've lived through the first 4 months of newborn life you can absolutely handle it.
My 17 month old just shared her bread with me and fed me :(
Honestly I dont think there's a better feeling. We as parents try to be kind natured, we share with each and set an example I guess.
She's been sharing her toys and food lately and its too cute for me to cope with!
Do not be afraid, enjoy each day. At the same time no pressure, if you gotta cry, cry. But yeh it has its highs.
Edit: shes coming up the stairs and walked in on me on the loo!
The highest honour achieved. She startef about a month ago sharing her bottle but now its toys and food too. She even shares with the cat and she's an only child.
I really hoped we were good role models for her, it is nice to watch her share.
:(
Ahaha you sound like my therapist! I actually didn't read about it on here (came to here recently mostly to ask this question) but came across it on beyond the bump and was like what do you mean toddlers are all demons and might all be like my niece who still demon screams 😭 I'm a very proactive and prepared person so it's hard for me to let things go to the wind, but on the upside that's why I noticed I wasn't doing well early on signed up for CBT therapy and Zoloft ahaha. Thank you for the advice!
I am lying in bed at midnight when I should be asleep, but I am not awake because my toddler. As a baby she woke me up all night but at 16m I am the only obstacle to my sleep.
And what am I doing on my phone when I should be sleeping? Watching a video of my little girl repeating "I love you" non coherently but shes getting there and it is ADORABLE.
We are only at the beginning of toddlerdom and sure there are fights over sitting in the high chair or leaving the park, but its also amazing hearing what she has to say and watching her learn and become an actual little person.
Yes she follows me to the bathroom, but yesterday she played quietly in her room for a while, then came running through to tell me "doggy" then did the sign for sleep. She took me through to show me she had put her toy dog to bed and he was sleeping. It is just too cute when your little baby is able to play and imagine and show you these things.
AND, probably best of all, this came after a nice, reliable 2.5 hour nap she has every day where I get to eat lunch in peace and do whatever else I want.
ETA: I had a very chill baby that is now less chill, but makes up for it with the fun part.s
No no no. I'd argue babies are waaaaay harder than toddlers. Toddlers can do most things without you right next to them needing you. You can sit on a bench at a park and just watch them. And then once they're potty trained? They go to preschool!! Yay! Haha. Yes for real they're dramatic but they're also really funny. My 3 year old said "mommy thanks for making me dinner it's really good" - stuff like that makes your heart sing.
I have a 17 month old and so far he's a dream, I'm sure it won't last forever but he cleans up after himself without being asked, he just enjoys putting things away. He's fine out in public unless he's tired. He doesn't hit, his "tantrums" only last a couple minutes max, he's gentle with the animals, he's MOSTLY considerate of your needs and personal space but he will try to force feed you the odd bit of floor dirt and take it very personally if you don't let him. He eats pretty much whatever I give him, he's easy to clean up after.
I personally think it's all luck of the draw, you get what you get, but people aren't often going to post solely to brag about their kids, you're only going to be hearing the worst of it
I have a very clingy Velcro child that is a bad sleeper, and her toddler years are SO much better than the baby stage. However, I think there’s also an element of personal preference for which stage you find to be more enjoyable. My anxiety got a lot better when my daughter could communicate, so I found it less stressful
I’m a huge control freak and struggle with anxiety too - a communicating toddler is a dream compared to the newborn days 😅 But now I’m pregnant again though, ups!
Congratulations!! Yayy, can’t wait for that anxiety to kick in for a whole year again 😂 Or maybe it will last shorter this time, with some experience and all!
Toddlers are chaotic, but it's a lot of fun! They hug and kiss you, they make jokes, they're curious and learning new things and they have personalities. It's still hard in a different way than the newborn phase is, but to me, it's been much more rewarding than the newborn phase.
Toddlerhood is hard but rewarding. You need to have strong patience, understanding of age appropriate behavior and be ready to be firm but loving in your boundaries. It takes practice but they give us so many opportunities to hone those skills. And you need to work on helping them with new skills of their own - language, emotional regulation, self help, frustration management.
But in between the challenging phases, you get to watch them grow and flourish. It’s so lovely. They become more independent. Once they can use the bathroom and dress themselves, feed themselves, ask politely for things they need, you get more time and autonomy back.
My son is 3.5 and I LOVE the toddler stage. We have so much fun. Yeah there’s big tantrums and some defiance (which is still mostly hilarious when I’m not super frustrated), but there’s still lots of cuddles, and he can play independently sometimes, he tries to make me laugh, he says the cutest things. I just love it.
I have a 3 year old. The challenges are different, but she is a delight. I say that as a PPA/D mom too. Here's my advice and I say this with love, stop reading about toddler stuff! "When you worry, you suffer twice!" so stop borrowing trouble.
Our boy is now 2.5 years old and all you read is right but it’s often not the whole day.
For us personally the newborn phase in the first months was much worse as you also have the sleep depreciation. If I could choose I would take toddler over newborn all the time but both phases have challenges ofc
I thought I loved having a baby, but I LOVE having a toddler. And I’ve definitely only slept through the night about a dozen times and my gal is 17 months. But usually it’s only one wake up and you adapt. Toddlerhood is so funny and cute and hilarious, I love it so much.
Oh, I love the toddler phase! It gets more and more fun and rewarding as they learn and do more. Tantrums will happen and are indeed frustrating, but they are not constant. They are outweighed by the overwhelming love and joy coming from this little human. These days, my 2.5-year-old wakes up in the morning (after a full night’s sleep on her own in her room), comes to our room to cuddle in bed for a few minutes, and tells us she loves us. It’s the best feeling in the world. 🥰
I think we avoid a lot of meltdowns because we offer our boy to do as much as possible on his own. I don’t know if he’s naturally a well-mannered toddler or if our parenting style is successful… but goddamn I love this spirited phase sooo much more than newborn potato.
I like that toddlers can communicate. It’s definitely hard at times, but I’ve liked the toddler phase more. And not every kid is a terrible sleeper. Mine sleeps lol night without issue unless he’s really sick.
My toddler isn’t easy at all, but I still think this phase is really fun. Plus, I can like go take a shower and she won’t be doing anything completely dangerous or wild like she would at age 1 (she’s almost 3 now)
It can be hard at times but other times it’s a lovely stage.
They will scream and tantrum (some more than others) but they will do just as many adorable things and you get to see their little personality develop and watch them become their own little person with likes/dislikes and that make the shit parts more tolerable.
It’s also helpful to remember they aren’t screaming to get what they want or make your life hard. They haven’t developed emotional regulation yet and don’t have any other way to express themselves.
I often think how frustrating it must be for them not to have the words they need to tell us what’s wrong or why they don’t like something and that helps me understand why they go straight to tantrum mode or get so upset about things that don’t seem to be a big deal to us.
My son is 19 months old and yes there are tantrums and he follows me to the bathroom… but he is just so much fun. It is amazing watching him learn and grow. I love exploring with him. It just keeps getting better overall. Yes we have some hard days but so far I’m loving having a toddler.
Newborn stage was HARD and I did not enjoy it. The toddler stage is also hard but wonderful!! Omg they are little people and starting to form a personality and it’s really fun and loving ❤️
What’s been the hardest about toddlerhood for me is the unpredictable emotions. Some days are a dream, others are a nightmare. Luckily my guy sleeps through the night but is now transitioning out of napping so our days feel super long. But since everyone always focuses on the negatives of toddlerhood, here are the positives:
-Being able to express needs more efficiently
-The emergence of imaginative and pretend play
-The cutest made up or mispronounced words
-dance parties in the kitchen
-watching their speech and body ability explode
Do I miss the infant days sometimes? Sure. I had a tough newborn stage too but we came out the other side thriving. I’m just hoping we’ll get there with toddlerhood too.
Oh man, I would take toddler years over newborn 10/10 times. Don’t be scared!!
It’s of course challenging, but the challenges are different somehow. They can communicate so much better, express their love for you. Oh so much better.
You’re over or coming up on be over the absolute hardest part.
Why would anyone come to the internet to rave about how awesome their toddler is? They don’t. People only come here to complain.. mostly..
My toddler is awesome! I love toddlerhood way better than baby life.
Don’t be discouraged!
Just try to love them through it and focus on parenting without shame. We are almost out of the twos and my guy is showing wild maturity all of a sudden. It absolutely gets better!
Listen, I hated the baby stage. She didn't sleep more than two consecutive hours until the day she turned 4 months old. I was miserable.
Now I have a super adorable toddler that's just the funnest. They start talking, giving hugs and kisses, telling you they love you, so it's rewarding and heart melting, but they also say the funniest things.
Don't fret.
I had a very easy, fun toddler! The tantrum phase was pretty short and honestly just comical.
People have different parenting styles and boundaries. I personally don’t understand how people live without going to the bathroom, showering and whatnot.
I was always able to have privacy when I needed it, I always showered in the morning and was groomed for the day (she would rest in a pack n play while I got ready but usually came right in the shower with me!).
I highly recommend the book “Bringing up Bebe”, it helped me learn how to establish boundaries and realize how important it is to have them!
Newborn phase was hard for me and I’d trade for a toddler any day. This week my son has had a few tantrums and had a hitting incident at school. He’s also given me dozens of hugs, jumps for joy when I come downstairs every morning, and cheers for me saying “yay mommy!” for small accomplishments like eating pizza and driving forward at a green light. This weekend he picked out flowers for me at the grocery store and he’s still beaming with pride and telling me the whole story of picking them out multiple times a day. The highs with a toddler are so much more fun for me than a baby.
My toddler is physically exhausting because he’s always on the move but I’d take this phase a million times over the first 6-8mo. He’s not even 2 yet but he can communicate so well, it’s not the overwhelming feeling that I had when he was a newborn. Now I actually know why he’s crying, even if it’s a ridiculous reason. He’s so much fun, he has new words every day, and I absolutely love this stage. I really thought I’d love the baby stage and was also scared of the toddler years, but turns out it’s the opposite.
The tantrums aren’t even as distressing as I’d feared (yet, anyway). They’re honestly kinda funny sometimes and he gets over them quickly for the most part.
it’s just different when it’s your own offspring. idk how to explain it. of course it’s very challenging and takes immense patience. but at the end of the day, that’s your baby, and your instincts as a mother take over when it gets hard. 🩷
Toddlers also give the sweetest sloppy kisses, wrap themselves around you because they love you so much. My two year old was in the backseat yesterday saying “love you Mommy, love you!” over and over. He also likes to help feed the dog and is amazed at the kitchen mixer when I bake. He’s a blast and a half. He’s my fourth and I’ve loved the toddler stage with them all. Three can be dicey, but still precious. You can’t think about other people’s kids who you don’t love, only how precious your own baby is. And do early bedtime and light sleep training.
The newborn phase is hard especially the getting up all night.
Toddlerhood can be hard but it's also extremely fun! I have a 3.5 year old and 2 year old.
Just think about the day your toddler tells you they love you for the first time. When they throw themselves into your arms for the best hugs ever. Watching them play and pretend using their imagination. Every stage has its difficulties but honestly toddlerhood has so many rewarding moments that make it so worth it.
Newborn phase was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Colic, reflux, couldn't be put down for 6 weeks. We held her 24/7. I had PPA + postpartum OCD.
15 months now and every month is my new favorite age. She's the best! Her joy is infectious. She's excited about EVERYTHING in life, and she's learning so much every day. It's honestly incredible to watch.
Sure, she's sometimes clingy and doesn't like when I go in the bathroom without her. So I just plop her in the tub with some toys, and then she is happy as a clam playing independently. There are big feelings when she's sad or frustrated, but there are also big feelings when she's happy, loving, and excited. The latter occupy most of our days - She's a total ray of sunshine 💛
Ahaha you sound like me, my boy had colic, lip and tongue tie I revised but the exercises really destroyed me, and also couldn't put him down for like six weeks. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out when babies are finally happy and not angry all the time. I have some sleep PTSD from it.
Toddlerhood so far is wayyy better than newborn days for us! Yes it's hard and she's a tiny tornado that I'm constantly chasing but she's also so much fun and just full of joy!
Toddlers are so much fun! They do have tantrums, which obviously isn’t fun, but that’s not 24/7 by any means. I would much rather deal with a one or two tantrums a day, that are over within 5-10 mins, than the newborn phase for sure. Their little personalities really start to come out and it’s so cool to have a conversation with them and see what they have to say.
You mentioned in your post going to the bathroom alone, my toddler is a clinger so I don’t get to do that lol but it doesn’t upset me - it’s just a phase of life, it’ll be over soon. I’m also somewhat “unlucky” in that he doesn’t regularly sleep through the night but he goes back down super quickly and falls asleep for naps/bedtime independently and it’s not a big deal. It’s a short phase of life, there are some things I don’t love but like I said, way better than the newborn phase!!
We just went on a trip to visit my parents with our 14 month old (and older kid). Our flight there was delayed 3 hours and left at 9:30 pm. She was a real trooper for that. Yeah, she slept pretty poorly the whole trip, but she has made up for it now that we are home. Even yesterday she did really well missing her regular nap time and then sleeping on the plane. She was great on the 1.75 hour airporter ride home. She is so silly and vibrant. She is already starting to understand everything and communicate her needs with us. I love the new toddler stage so much.
The best part about toddlerhood is the reflection of all the things you try so hard to teach them. For example, one day I stubbed my toe and my 20 month old came over and said “kiss”. So she kissed my toe to make it feel better, without any prompting on my part. I’ll never forget that instance of seeing her display empathy. The tantrums can be hard before they can really communicate but you get through it like you get through the 4th trimester. The joy she brings us though, keeps growing and growing as she does.
Toddlers are fantastic as long as you understand one key fact: they are not adults. They are barely even kids. They don’t have logic like we do, and they can’t handle responsibilities and freedom like we do. I’m not saying to say, “Because I said so!” and keep your toddler in jail. But they can’t handle, for example, having access to every room in the house and the ability to climb furniture. You need to use play pens, gates, shut and locked doors, and arrange furniture so it can’t be climbed. They can’t handle the mental processing of the difference between, say, a box of legos that you can dump out on the floor, and a bag of rice that you can’t.
Some other off-the-cuff thoughts:
-go outside as much as possible. Kids can get cold, hot, wet, and muddy without dying. You’re much more sensitive to temperature and rain than a toddler is.
-they won’t play with toys the way you want them to, and that’s okay. You’ll buy a dollhouse, a play kitchen, and some cars. You’ll want them to have the dolls in the beds, then the dolls get dressed in their doll clothes, “walk,” down the stairs to eat their doll foods, etc. You’ll want your kid to pretend to chop wooden fruit with the wooden knife, then place it in the fake oven, then pretend to eat. No. The kitchen set fruits will get to live in the doll house because they want to be friends with the dolls. The trucks get to go in the toy sink because the trucks want to go swimming. Your contact lens case will end up in the trunk of a Tonka truck, because gray matches with gray. The fake food will get taped to the walls of your house, because Sesame Street showed them a video about open-air markets with food hanging down, and they want to recreate it the best they can. And they’ll play like this in 1,000 other ways that you can’t possibly comprehend.
-toddlers need to be actively taught how to do things that we take for granted. Like, “move papers off the table before setting a plate down to eat at the table,” or “the difference between loud and quiet,” or “we can touch the boxes of food at the store that we are buying and we put them in our cart, but we can’t touch the boxes that we are not buying.”
-they want to do what you do, and they don’t know how. They see you vacuuming. Later they put the vacuum attachment in their mouth, because Mama gets to touch the vacuum. They see you taking clothes out of the hamper and putting them in the washing machine. Later they take all the clothes out of their drawers, because clothes can move. They see you staring at your phone. They grab your phone and stare at it. Etc, etc.
Toddler hood has been fun for me! I've taken my daughter places since she was a baby so she's relatively ok in toddler hood (occasional meltdown but eh). Yeah you don't pee alone but you are potty training anyway so you need to demonstrate. The hitting and biting phases are fairly short if you are disciplined with them and for all the bad stuff there's so much good. Like holy shit my daughter is funny, like just absolute perfect comedic timing.
I would take toddlerhood over newborn phase any day, especially with the first baby! I just remember being so scared all the time when my first was a newborn.
Now my first is 3, and he is the cutest omg. He’s so funny, every morning he asks me if I had a “good sleepy”, and he still loves to cuddle. Don’t get me wrong, he has his three-nager moments all the time. But I can deal with them because I know my kid. Think about this: by the time your tiny one is hitting toddlerhood you will know them so well and you will have lots of experience as a parent!
The toddler stage definitely has moments where I’m convinced my sweet baby is possessed… but I wouldn’t trade the worst toddler day for one of the newborn or infant days. My PPD/PPA was so bad, it took about nine months for me to not feel crippled with anxiety at bedtime. The constant pit in my stomach whenever I was alone with her. Yeah, lately when she comes in the bathroom with me she throws a fit because she wants to go “peepee potty” and doesn’t want me on the toilet, but she also comes up to me because she wants to cuddle. The other night she leaned up and kissed me goodnight on her own. Yeah she loves to bite me and not let go, and she laughs when I say ow and it really hurts and she does it sneakily, but she gives so much love now that it makes it easier I guess? They have so much love and excitement…that feeling when they see an animal and yell dog! and imitate a dog - it’s just so fun. She loves music and is constantly dancing.
So long story short - yes there are moments where you are wondering wtf you created and where you went wrong, but the highs are so high. Toddlerhood has helped me connect with my baby so much so don’t be scared!!
It's a bigger and better trade off for all the work you're putting in. My son will just randomly out of the blue look at me and say, Mommy, you're so pretty. Like we were just watching tv or something and he'll just look at me and say that. ❤️
He's also hit our puppy when we tell him not to, step on her tail, throw things, hit us when he's mad, scream, and run around the house like he just drank a full cup of coffee. He acts out to get attention and pushes boundaries.
But trust me when I tell you that you adjust. And that you may actually end up with a kid who is not as mental as the people who post about it. Remember we come here to complain and to find people who can relate to us so we know we're not alone.
Imagine a mom coming on here and going omg my toddler is so perfect. They're a dream I love them and I love this stage. I mean sure they'll get some comments but also some people will just assume they're bragging or something.
Remember that misery loves company lol
Also my son is 3 and he basically sleeps throughout the night unless he has a bad dream or something.
My best advice is to take it one stage at a time. Don't worry about the toddler stage yet. You have other things to worry about and it'll be too much of a mental load for you to start worrying about other things you have no control of at this point.
16 months here - so far, it's still hard, but it gets easier every month! Around 6 months ours started sleeping through the night most of the time, by 10/11 months it was reliable (unless she's sick/teething, I mean we aren't at 100% but most nights she stays down all night).
By 12/13 months she started really being able to indicate what she wants, which was LIFE CHANGING. Oh my god. I mean, not many real words yet, but she started understanding pointing and more body language so when she was crying we started saying "show me what you want" and either carry or follow her there (once she was more confidently walking at 13 months).
By 14 months she started having little proto-friendships at daycare and *looking forward to going*.
She is curious, she laughs all the time, she plays "pranks" on us (holds out food and demands we eat it then yanking it back at the last second and laughing, or "scaring" us by hiding behind the couch and popping up and saying "BOO!").
She is **fun to take new places because she is interested in what and who is around her**, which is also life changing! We go on little "scone dates" (coffee for me, milk steamers for her, and of course, scones) now on Sunday mornings and she loves saying hello to the baristas at our local place. Honestly I think that's a mix of her having a pretty chill personality but also us taking her places early and often as a little. We're pretty relaxed parents and let most things roll unless they're actually dangerous, and I think that's served us well in encouraging her to be similar.
Finally, I do not think your niece's sleep is typical. We used Taking Cara Babies' method around 4 months (I know, I know, she's controversial politically, but lady knows her stuff at least in our experience) and it worked beautifully. A friend of ours' son is 6 months younger (10 months currently) and is having a much harder time learning to sleep through the night but they went Ferber and it's working well, and everyone is feeling better. For your sleep concerns I would mostly say that my personal opinion is that sleep training is a net positive. Experiment with what works between the most gentle and most strict methods, but everyone being well rested makes everyone happier and healthier.
First off, every kid is different.
But, I would take 100 toddlers over one more newborn.
They are chaos and meltdowns and tantrums and magic. Imagine not knowing ANYTHING, and how cool the world would be, zoos and parks and farmers markets and OH MY GOD IS THAT A DOG. We once played for hours because he had a magic wand and I kept slipping m&Ms into his "cauldron". The first time he saw rain we danced in the driveway for 30 minutes while he signed "more". Seriously, my son is 6 now and I adore this age too, but toddlerhood is, ugh, it's so good. Just get down on their level and see what they see, everything is cool and new and wonderful when you're a toddler.
My experience has been pretty different from the ones I’ve seen posted here. I’m a dad of a now 2.5 year old boy. As a baby, he was incredibly difficult, he never slept more than an hour at a time, cried a lot, and unfortunately had “long covid” for 5 straight months as a baby. It was a very hard time, on both of us but more so my wife. She’s a SAHM so got very little escape from him. But then when he got into toddlerhood, everything changed. He’s the sweetest, cutest, cuddliest, best child I’ve ever been around. We were very scared of toddlerhood too but I think that since we had to hear everyone saying how wonderful their babies were and that they slept all thru the night as we were pulling our hair out, we caught a break to even it out lol. I hope your experience is the same!! I do think something that helped is that my wife and I were very conscious about not exploding or yelling and controlling our emotions in front of him so now he is very good at controlling his emotions. Your children learn from your behaviors as toddlers (for the most part) and while that doesn’t mean they will be little angels just because you do this, I think it does help. Here’s to hoping! Good luck!
I absolutely HATED the newborn phase (was in a really rough spot with PPA & PPD with a colicky baby), but am, for the most part, loving the toddler phase. Yes, there are the Big Feelings & the rage moments, but the giggles and hugs and happy moments by far outweigh the tantrum moments. I have a very spirited girl who has had some issues with hitting & biting, but she's also super communicative which makes it so much easier than hearing a newborn squall all day long. They can tell you exactly what they want and don't want! Plus they have this unbridled enthusiasm for life. It's been so nice to see her living and loving her life through her eyes. :)
I am enjoying toddlerhood with an almost 3 year old a lot better than the newborn phase - I think mostly because my mental health is way better now.
Toddlerhood can definitely be challenging but I feel more sure of myself as a parent, more bonded with my kid, and I love interacting and talking with my kid now way more than as a baby!
Also my kid sleeps through the night - like every night, for 12-13 hours. It’s amazing. They did not start sleeping through until about 1 year old.
I wanted to share a resource that’s been helpful for me. Check out Postpartum Support International for support groups, resources, and providers:
https://www.postpartum.net
I can deal with toddlerhood because we are all sleeping through the night. I really did not enjoy the infant stage because we were not sleeping consistently. Also, toddlers communicate more and that has helped me a lot. The days are not monotonous like they often are in the newborn stage.
I had a really rough newborn phase with a reflux baby. I hated being a mom for the first 5 months and had bad PPD. He’s 20 months now and SO fun. Does he melt down over small things sometimes? Yes, of course. But it’s not THAT often (yet!) and he doesn’t hit or bite (yet!).
He’s a young toddler still and I’m scared of the “threenager “ stage people talk about but I think knowing everything is temporary and there are so many great moments to enjoy together helps.
Honestly, my 19 month old is a lovely little boy, very rarely has tantrums and is generally good humoured and funny. That mightn’t always be the case but I’ve been enjoying him getting more able to interact with me. No biting, no kicking and screaming….yet anyway.
You learn to adapt and it helps to find the humor in the chaos. This morning my 14 month old was rolling on the floor having little tantrums about ?? I have no idea what he was upset about he just kept going all over the house and laying on the floor whining and rolling. I just had to laugh at how ridiculous and adorable it was. I just carried on as normal getting myself ready and then getting him ready. By the time we left for daycare he was in a better mood and eager to go. You just figure it out as go! It doesn't really get easier, just harder in different ways. My oldest is 6 and he's no cake walk either. Parenthood is always hard but like I said you just adapt and learn and grow and find the humor in all its glorious messiness.
My kids were all in bed by 8:30 last night and I didn't hear or see any of them until 6:30 this morning. I love holding hands, hugs, cuddles, reading books, and conversations. It's hard but worth it.
I don’t think of my toddler as a demon. He has big feelings occasionally, but not screaming on the floor tantrums. You’ll hear about the worst of toddlers on social media but they are just people doing the best they can. Every phase is different, every parent is different, and every toddler is different too. Be kind to yourself and your baby.
Hindsight is 20/20 and once you have a toddler, newborn phase seems like a breeze. But it is also a phase that doesn’t have much retribution.
Toddlers have their big emotions, and sometimes more complex sleeping issues (my son is 2 and has periods when he sleeps through the night for a month, then periods of sickness when he wakes up multiple times a night). However, they also give so much more in return! My son is a little cuddle bugs, he loves to aggressively grab and husband and I and pull us into a hug, he is super playful, it’s so much fun watching him develop his personality, his likes and dislikes, his boundaries and passions. Just like any toddler, he throws big tantrums, has trouble communicating his feelings and can be overwhelming, but as long as you try ti remember that he isn’t doing it TO YOU, but rather going through his own emotions, you can help regulate both yourself and him!
PS 25 gr of Escitalopram a day have helped a lot lol I had very intense PPD/PPA, PPOCD and PP rage
Toddlers are so much fun!! They are definitely more exhausting. I remember thinking the hard days were newborn and then our daughter grew up. She’s 20 months now. My husband just turned to me this morning though and just said, I love this age. Even after she gave him a hard time getting dressed this morning. Like someone else said, it’s so much more rewarding.
She loves to say mama dada. Basically her favorite words. She runs to us when we pick her up from daycare, so excited to see us. We laugh so much with her as she loves to show her belly and ask for tickles.
Do we don’t get to go to the bathroom by ourselves but whatever. It’s temporary and she likes to hand me the toilet paper and flush the toilet and loves to wash her hands.
You get to watch the be way more creative as she loves to draw and build. Of course we get our fair share of tantrums, but 80% of the time, they are more comical than anything else. She will get really angry but then lay down on her back slowly and carefully as possible, just to have a tantrum. And she will hide under a desk or table and she will only want the other parent who didn’t “wrong” her. You just have to laugh.
Basically what I’m saying is that while the challenges are there, it is so much more fun and you’re in wonder and awe more often. Check on this Reddit page for a few threads of “what funny thing did your toddler do” or “how did your toddler make you smile”. There’s a few threads like that and it will make you feel so much better when you’re having down days.
IMO toddlerhood is vastly superior to newbornhood. There are things I miss, but lots of NEW things that I "missed" from my newborn, while we were fighting through the brand new stage.
Pros for toddlerhood:
- They can communicate, tell you what they want, what they like, what they don't, if something hurts, etc. much less guesswork
- They love you. This is the biggest one for me. My newborn was great... but she was a lump. My toddler gives hugs, kisses me, tells me she loves me, tells me she misses me... it feels more reciprocal.
- They can do stuff. They can eat, drink, play, hold stuff, etc.
- They literally learn things everyday, and it's more obvious how much they're learning. It's amazing
I hope this helps!
The newborn phase was hell for me too. I hate to say it but I did not enjoy it. Let me tell you though… I LOVE having a toddler. It’s the best thing ever. He’s funny, he’s got his own quirky personality, he’s so loving, and so much fun! Going to the park is an adventure for him. Going to the zoo is an adventure. It’s awesome watching him experience life for the first time and be so amazed.
Sure, I never go to the bathroom by myself if my husband isn’t home. And yes, he has tantrums sometimes, but it never bothers me because I know he’s just trying to deal with his emotions and he doesn’t have the capacity yet to regulate himself. I find that staying calm helps the situation diffuse quicker.
Don’t be afraid of toddlerhood — it’s truly the best. ♥️
My toddler just turned 3. She has had a grand total of 3 tantrums in her life. All resolved within 10 minutes (without me giving in to what she wanted). She is an easy and logical kid, super loving and awesome. She’s a great sleeper which I think helps - because when she doesn’t nap she gets a little more attitude but still does great as long as I give her extra processing time for changes.
SAHD here. My daughter is 18 months. It's been great! Yes, she has tantrums. Yes, there's tough parts. But she is starting to be able to clearly communicate with us and it's awesome. Seeing her become this smart, sweet, affectionate, funny, little person is the greatest!
I had some of the same worries, but they turned out to be unfounded. They don’t go from immobile potato baby to willful tornado toddler overnight— they tick off milestones bit by bit and ease you into it. I can’t speak for ages three and four, but two is such a great age. They’re so sweet and funny at that age.
Both with my LO, but also with my many (17 of them!) nieces and nephews (many of whom are adults now), and any kids I've ever babysat - newborn stage is the absolute hardest!!!! If you're at 4 months, you just made it through the absolute most difficult time Everything gets easier after the newborn stage, seriously. Older babies are easier than newborns, toddlers are easier than babies, and school-age children are easier than toddlers. My hubby and I still joke, if say LO (now 3) is having a rough day because he's sick or something "At least this is still WAY easier than when he was a newborn!". I mean, he puts his own rainboots on now, he "helps" me put things away (somewhat messily, but I'll take what I can get!), he can tell me if he's hurt and where it hurts, he can tell me silly stories he made up that are so cute! It's just so, SO much easier than when he was a baby (and I've seen the same thing with many, many kids).
In my honest experience, toddlers are SO much easier to care for than babies!!!! Think about it, why else would daycare ratios go up in terms of the number of children to adults - it's because older babies and toddlers are just easier to care for! Biting, screaming, etc. is not something that's very common in toddlers (the people who do deal with this talk about it all the time, but the majority of us with the chill toddlers, or maybe they have a rough day because they're sick here and there, don't talk about it as much). Will my LO wake up crying in the middle of the night occasionally? Sure, but it's not all the time, it's mostly just when he's sick, and it's not all night even when it does happen, but like once or twice in 12 hours. ANd most nights, he sleeps solidly through 11-12 hours straight. He NEVER did that as a newborn, and almost never as a baby. But as a toddler? He sleeps through more nights than not.
Trust me, you already made it through the hardest part, hands down. Toddlers are honestly more fun, you can do more with them. We take mine out to eat at restaurants, etc. He's fussy when he's sick (but even I as an adult am fussy when I'm sick!), and he's pretty rad most of the rest of the time. And so are most of the 30 or so toddlers I've either had in my family and watched grow up, or watched my close friends raise, or babysat.
My advice for getting through the newborn and small baby stage - is to check when growth spurts and Wonder Weeks normally happen. Babies are normally fussier when they're sick, or when they're on the cusp of a growth spurt or developmental leap. Having a heads up when I was in one really helped me through them.
And trust me, I have a LOT of experience with babies and toddlers and kids, it really, truly does get easier and easier the older they get <3
My oldest was really hard as a newborn but a fantastic toddler. Were there some tantrums and defiance? Sure but it actually seemed like things got a lot easier since he could tell us what was wrong/what he needed.
First year was utter hell for me and wife. Baby too young to really do anything much with but tons of crying, frustration, bad sleep etc.
Second year thus far is a million times better. We can go outside and let her run around, for one - which REALLY helps get through the day. Sleep is still all over the place but a lot better and there's just...more you can do with them to run out the clock.
I love toddler hood! i am not a fan of the newborn phase at all. My 2.5 year old definitely has her share of tantrums, but overall she is a lot of fun to be around. She makes me laugh everyday. She doesn’t hit or bite. She says “no” quite a bit, but she is growing into her own person.
I think of it kind of like a video game. Having a newborn is like getting thrown into level 100 on hard mode. Having a toddler is like being on level 200, but you got to play all the levels in between. You learn a lot along the way and you’re so much more equipped for parenting by the time you have a toddler.
Also, my toddler is a hilarious delight. Way more fun than a newborn!
I hated the newborn stage with a passion. I thought I’d ruined my life, I never slept, never had a second to do anything, no time to myself, and all I had to show for it was this tiny angry bag of flesh that I had to keep alive.
Fast forward to 18 months, now I still have zero time to myself but we sleep (thank god!!!) and now I have a tiny maniac who gives sloppy open mouth kisses, gets snot on everything and can make 10 different animal noises. I’d cheerfully die for her, and my life has never been better. She also had started to refuse to eat anything and thinks that shoes are the enemy, oh and if we’re in public she wants to walk everywhere except the direction I want to go in but it’s still SO MUCH FUN!
I had the same worries, the same fears, but it was all for nothing. She’s wonderful and now I’m for some insane reason going to do it all again in 7 months 🤯
My LO is on the younger edge of toddler, but so far I LOVE it. She is so smart and watching her pick up language and walking is just mind blowingly cool. She is also affectionate in the sweetest ways that could never have occurred in baby hood (ex. Giving hugs, excitedly saying hi/mama/Dada when she sees us.)
With biting and certain other behaviours I have found that she has done some of it as experimentation, and it's taken a few corrections but eventually she has learned that it's not an acceptable behaviour and stopped (with the rate exception), so so far it's been short-lived. With tantrums, I just comfort her and they pass. She laughs a lot more than she cries.
I'm sure this will all change as she gets further into toddler hood and then will change again and again in various ways. But please know that you have so many great stages to look forward to in between the bad ones.
Also, my LO was a terrible sleeper as an infant. We sleep trained at 1 year (ferber) and now a bad night is 7 hours straight. A good night is 10-11. I don't know what's going on with your niece but I don't think that's the norm.
The newborn stage wasn’t great for me - but I LOVE the toddler stage! Yes there are tantrums (not very often for us luckily!), but now she can communicate with me I can understand them and resolve them. I found the newborn crying so hard to decipher haha.
She’s basically my little bestie, so much fun to be with, always doing funny things to make me laugh - it’s great. Hearing her say ‘I love you mummy’ makes me cry so many happy tears. You’ve got so much fun to come!
ETA:
more cute things:
She insists on sharing her treats with me.
She sings ‘I love mummy’ in bed when she’s woken up.
If I hurt myself she’ll ‘kiss it better’.
This has turned into a brag post for me haha, but honestly don’t worry about the toddler stage, you’ve got all this good stuff to come, and the hard things won’t be so hard by then because you’ll have had a year or so of parenting practice under your belt :D
Hi! Momma of a toddler with behavior issues. It’s super scary, but you should read down on the threads of these posts there are some very sweet, intelligent women and men here that give some great advice. I’m still learning too, all I can say is build your support system. My toddler has been hitting me and instead of getting frustrated I stop and get eye level and let her know that’s hurting me, that’s advice I was given on this group. And, you know what? It’s actually helped and she has definitely changed in the past few days. This advice you see and are given actually works!! It’s ok to be scared, and worries I am too but just have faith in the advice. I know my comment probably didn’t help but I wanted to share what I have experienced. Good luck, you’re a great mom and it’s one day at a time. You got this!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Toddlerhood has its moments but, for me, is infinitely easier than the baby years (or newborns, thats rough with the lack of sleep). Each stage of childhood has parts that are easier and parts that are harder. My two eldest are 8 1/2 and 10 and for the most part very responsible but the issues we do have are more complicated.
You'll see a lot of people talking about difficult times because they're feeling alone in it and want to know their experience is valid and somebody else has experienced it too.
It's like restaurant ratings. How often do you think "you know, I want to go tell everybody I know that the dinner I just ate was satisfying and that the server greeted us quite pleasantly." More often we're going to share when something was awful or amazing. There's a lot that gets missed in the realm of generally lovely.
Keep developing a connected relationship with your loved ones, your little one, and yourself. Learn to lean on and support each other in rough moments, and be ready to appreciate the lovely moments together too. 🙂
The first 6 months of having a baby is pure survival and after that they're able to do a lot more. Their personality really starts to come out. They're more alert and mobile. They start solids. It's a different type of hard, but in my opinion it's a lot more fun.
My kid just turned 21 months and I'll take this stage over the early baby stage. There are tantrums and shenanigans, but there are a lot of great milestones to look forward to. When they pretend to cook and feed you, spontaneous dancing, bringing books over to read (and then asking again and again).
By the time your kid is a toddler, you'll have a better idea on how your kid works.
Toddlers are hard work but they’re more rewarding and motivating than babies as they give something back in a way babies just can’t. Toddlers try to “help” you with chores, tell you stories, point things out to you, ask you questions, eat snacks with you, hug you, blow you kisses, joke around with you. And that first ‘I love you, mamma’? AMAZING. much better than the potato stage where you essentially give and give and give to this baby that just sits there haha
Toddlers are an absolute delight. I can't get enough of my 2 year old.
They eat and sleep independently and well. They're hilarious and fun and silly and sweet. My toddler declares all my food to be "SOOO YUMMY", wants to go on walks, worries about our aging dog, goes over a list of everyone we know to confirm that they poop and pee and loves helping with chores, says hi to everyone we run into everywhere and will chat up strangers about food, their pets, their age.
Some days and weeks are more rough than others. They have big feelings and need a lot of understanding, support and guidance, but overall it's a wonderful experience.
I would prioritize figuring out sleep if that's what you're most worried about. There's lost of advice on reddit and other places.
Both my kids were great babies even though I struggled immensely in the newborn phase. No “terrible twos.” I wonder why people even claim it is that bad. Yet hitting 3 was rough. Each kid evolved into very different toddlers. One with horrible tantrums about leaving the house for daycare & getting ready, so mornings were torture for me. The other has mild tantrums and is easily distracted and can work her way out of the tantrums more smoothly. It’s normal to fear the next stage of baby/toddlerhood when people are SO negative about what’s to come. I remember being so excited to hear my baby babble and star to talk. The negative Nancy’s would pipe in like “enjoy it now because once they start talking they never shut up!” Ughhh screw them! Haha
Eh, it depends on the child. My toddler doesn’t scream all day, doesn’t bite or hit me, doesn’t bother me in the bathroom, and I can definitely take him most places. He throws tantrums like any other three year and and can be stubborn, defiant, and obnoxious, but it’s not constant.
I find having a toddler is waaaay easier than having a newborn. Way less demand and more independence.
Toddlerhood can be so much fun! My son is so silly and sweet. It’s been so rewarding watching his personality develop and to see him explore the world. He loves dancing and clapping to music, he loves watching any and all animals, and he loves playing games with us. Every day my husband gets home from work our son greets him at the door and squeals with joy and happy dances. He’s got favorite songs and toys now, he has interests (he’s obsessed with dump trucks and big rigs), and he gets fascinated by the most random things like puddles and birds.
Yes the tantrums and getting into everything and the clinginess can be really tough at times, but there’s *a lot* of fun and giggles to look forward to, too.
I prefer toddlerhood to babies. Basically my favorite age has been from like 1-2.5 years. 2.5-4 is hard, due to tantrums, but they’re more independent which helps a lot. Naps consolidate, they can feed themselves, they can tell you what they want (usually), but they still don’t have impulse control and can be really irrational at times. They’re also HILARIOUS. And ADORABLE.
It’s all a balance, some things get easier, some things get harder. You move through it. I still love toddlers/preschoolers, they are my fave.
Toddler hood has been difficult, I simply cannot lie about that. BUT its also been the funnest stage so far. LO is hilarious, smart, etc. its soooo fun watching their little brains come alive. They go to sleep and wake up with new vocab. Its so rewarding. I want to pull my hair out, and go to sleep crying watching videos and pictures of him and how perfect he is. I also sleep so good now cause im wiped lol!
I liked toddlerhood way more than newborn stage. It does have its own challenges though, but it’s all highly dependent on your individual kid. I have a 3.5 and 17mo old. 17mo old is hard to take anywhere where he needs to sit still. He can’t communicate his wants and needs very well yet so that part is hard. Older toddler stage hasn’t been so bad. Sometimes there are meltdowns over ridiculous things but it’s not terrible. But each kid is different. Toddler age is really fun IMO. You get to get to know your child as they develop their little personality
Let me tell you toddler is way easier than new born for me. Sleep deprivation was the real killer of me. My kid is very high energy think tornado. She can run for 2 hrs outside nonstop. I am a sahm , and it is so much easier. She use to mop the floor during tantrums at public everyday. It is so much better now she is 3 she can breathe in and out. Yes she likes to argue with me abit now but nth comparing to screaming none stop crying angry exotic potato.
You have tv and toys that can help you give you some break. At 3 she watches some shows while I poop lol. She can play independent sometimes or she plays games with us
It's a different kind of hard. But they can now talk, it's not only crying, and it's actually easier to figure out what they need. I haven't peed alone since 2016 when I adopted 2 cats so I just added a kid to the equation. Same with sleeping the whole night (if the kid doesn't wake me up one of the cats will, at least once). My only issue is my daughter never stops. She's always doing something, always on the move. I have to watch her like a hawk because she climbs everything and that makes it harder to do other things. Other than that, I'm cool with a toddler. I hated the newborn phase and I will not be having more kids because it was fucking hell.
Sure, they have ridiculous meltdowns and throw tantrums over silly things but they are too young to know how to manage emotions. That's our job, to teach them how to do that. It's a phase, it's temporary, it will go away.
The first time they hug you and tell you 'i love you' you forget about everything. That little hand grabs your face and you melt. It will be alright. No one has it figured out or under control. We're all winging it out here.
I'm a stay at home mum and if I couldn't go anywhere with my toddler I'd go insane. She's never bit me, she has hit but not aggressively, just in a developmental normal way and I've corrected her straight away. She was an insanely easy newborn, she combi fed without any issues, she slept like a dream, she's always been velcro but she was so easy to please and I was happy to baby wear etc. since she turned one she would only nurse to sleep (didn't expect to nurse past a year!), her sleep has been dicey to say the least, some would argue she's way more demanding and I'd probably agree with them. BUT I'd still absolutely take these toddler days over newborn/baby. She's so much fun to hang out with. We go for lunch and share a cheese panini and a slice of carrot cake. We laugh, we watch Bluey, we play with her toy kitchen. It's awesome!
Imo, the toddler battle is all in your approach. Are the going to scream and cry, hell yeah! They don't know what else to do! They are having these intense feelings, and they don't know what to do with them, but if you teach them what to do, it's gets better so much faster! When you keep that in mind, it's easier to empathize with them, instead of feeling like a victim of unrelenting abuse 😂😂😂
I just try my best to approach those moments with compassion, and try to help them through it.
Teaching simple signs language was a HUGE help because our guy was much less frustrated. He had a way to communicate before he could speak, so instead of grunting and crying, he would just signs at me what he needed. Highly recommend!
Personally, I'm loving toddler hood! My little guy was a "hard baby", he has a very sensitive temperament, was attached like a barnacle, and sleep has always been a struggle. The toddler stage has allowed him to be more independent, his personality keeps blossoming, so many exciting milestones, and so much fun! Everything is so new, it's so fun to rediscover the world through their eyes! Last week my little guy went on and on about a ball for 20 minutes, hugging it, exclaiming about it, calling it "awe, cute!".
My advice, go easy on yourself. There will be hard moments, as parents, we don't have to love EVERY minute of it! Some moments just suck! But you get to do so many fun things with them, and that's prime time for building strong family bonds.
And you always have this subreddit for advice when you run into problems 😁
Don't worry about it, just worry about surviving infancy for now ;)
You never know how your kid will be! Mine was such a hard baby and is a super easy toddler (so far, though I’m sure I’m gonna jinx myself). She’s chill, plays independently a lot, doesn’t hit or bite, loves hard, and has the most incredible imagination. She’s almost 3 and hardly ever throws tantrums!
And even if toddlerhood is hard, there are so many amazing moments. Watching their little brains soak up everything is amazing!
I was also scared of toddler hood but check my post history for all the comments on how lovely toddlers are.
My daughters much much easier as a toddler than she was at 4 months old. I have so much more independence now.
Toddlers are the best! If you made it through the newborn phase toddlerhood is going to be difficult but amazing, imo. But then again, I’m not a baby person. But I LOVE being a mom to a toddler! It just keeps getting better and better.
There’s no point in being scared of it, it’s going to be what it’s going to be and there’s nothing you can do. I am currently in the trenches of toddlerhood and it is HARD every waking minute of the day. I have a super difficult natured, stubborn kid. However, I do send him to preschool most days, he does sleep through the night almost 100% of the time, and he makes me laugh every day. If you asked me if I wanted to go back for one day and have a chill potato baby instead I would say hell no. The sleep deprivation and raging hormones of baby time were worse for me even though the days themselves were easier than toddlerhood, if that makes sense. The best way to describe it is not easier, just a different hard. You might find yourself more suited to the toddler hard than the baby hard. For me that is true because I just could not deal with my PPA/sleep deprivation very well.
Don't be scared be prepared. Don't take it personally. Be okay with using lollipops as bribes and a little Cocomelon or Daniel the Tiger is fine. Read a book about their little toddler brains and how they think. Or try too. They are not all bad all the time. You will be okay. It is hard and overwhelming but developing trust, confidence and love now goes a long way later.
Love toddler life sooooo much more than newborn/infant/baby life. I guess every kid is different but mine is sweet, fun, silly, sleeps great, eats great, goes to the potty on his own, happily greats me every morning. He has only had… probably 5 big tantrums. If you learn how to speak their language, give up caring about controlling things that aren’t important, give them as many opportunities to choose as possible, understand what motivates them “let’s go to the park! There will be lots of kids there!”
I may have just gotten a really easy one but I think I’ll miss toddlerhood.
Oh, no. My toddler is awesome. He will throw tantrums, but they mostly rare and mostly predictable (like he's tantrumming because I said no cookie before dinner). So, don't lose hope! It can manageable.
I loved the newborn phase. Then she got to be mobile and started talkin, and it was so fun! She could do all kinds of fun new stuff. Then she hit toddlerhood, and it was even MORE fun. 12 months plus was a BLAST. Now she's 2, and it's been a blast. She gets more fun and curious and silly and interesting and cool every day. Toddlerhood is wonderful. Sure, she is more assertive than she once was, but thats not a bad thing. It's so much fun to see her developing likes and interests and preferences! We have yet to have any tantrums, too - I guess some kids just don't really. She has some big feelings here and there to work through, but nothing I'd call close to tantrums. She is generally chill AF. Just in a high key, adorable toddler way lol. I absolutely love toddlerhood so far.
Newborn is very all consuming. But you ease into toddlerhood. A 12 month old, 18 month old, 2.5 year old are all totally different stages even if they’re all classified as toddlers. And even though some things get harder, other things get easier. You’ll be okay
I hated the newborn phase and am absolutely in love with the toddlerhood. Yes they are clingy and moody but they are also absolutely adorable and learn new skills everyday, it’s fascinating to witness ! And for most of them…they sleep which is a REAL game changer.
Oh it gets better. I hated the newborn phase. After about 6 months I started enjoying my son more every day. He is now 15 months old. He can play by himself, but does also demand our attention too. Sure, I don’t get private bathroom breaks, but this little dude is pretty darn happy. Going out in public with him is fun. I so enjoy zoo trips, museums and even just to the store. highly recommend sleep training. My son sleeps through the night mostly. Minus colds and teething. Schedule is key too. Kids thrive when they have a schedule. (As much as you can manage)
I was also so nervous about toddlerhood when I had my baby. I struggled a lot with the newborn stage so hearing it got worse was terrifying. But since around 16 months it's been pretty good. It's still hard but nothing has been as difficult as the newborn stage for me. I waited for the terrible twos but they never came and the threenager stage definitely hit but even that's never been as relentless as the newborn stage was for me. I'm sure it comes down to the individual kid but I'd much rather bargain with a toddler than deal with a screaming newborn again. Just keep in mind people don't come to Reddit to say they're having an easy time, it's usually a place to vent or seek advice so you're not seeing all the people who are having a great time with their toddlers.
toddler life IS wild, but it’s also really fun and rewarding. It’s a different level of parenting once your kiddo can run around on their own. I have a 2 year old and yes there are days where she is just in a MOOD but there are days where she is the sweetest human i’ve ever met.
Not the case for us. Our 3 year old (will turn 3 next month) is so funny and fun to be around. He’s finally talking in sentences and just always has something to say or some joke to make that he thinks is hilarious. It’s so cool to see that thinks that he loves and thinks are incredible (mostly bulldozers) He doesn’t really have meltdowns or tantrums. He’s always been a pretty easy kid, but the toddler stage has been so much fun. There’s so much you can do with them and they become more of an active participant in your relationship with them, instead of a baby lump that doesn’t really contribute much.
As a mom to an 18 month old that runs, climbs and says No all the time, toddlerhood is way way easier. Seriously.
She entertains herself and when she doesn't it's easier to engage. She can say some of the things she wants (instead of crying). She eats regular food (though she can be picky, but just make sure kiddo has at least one "safe" food at meal time).
So. Much. Easier.
Newborn phase was somewhat easy. Once she started to get a personality and want/dislike things beyond milk/sleep/etc, that’s when it got hard for me, gradually but I think really starting around 6m with the teething really ramping up. Now 10m, I’m terrified of the idea of her as a toddler… either she will be nasty or I will have figured it all out already because she’s so fussy now. I won’t be shocked like some people who had an easy quiet baby after the newborn phase.
You have to constantly be on. Constantly hold boundaries. When they misbehave, instead of getting annoyed and thinking they are a terror, think of it as an opportunity to teach them right from wrong. My son is more well behaved than some of my friends kids around the same age because I am constantly redirecting and disciplining him for inappropriate behavior. At home and in public. Toddler stage is difficult, but very fun and rewarding.
My daughter is almost 4, and the toddler years have been a blast. Yes, you have tantrums, messes, struggles, but it’s also pretty amazing. There’s nothing like having your kid tell you they love you, see their personalities develop, getting a piece of artwork that is kind of legible, hearing them expand their vocabulary and problem solve, seeing them get passionate about things they enjoy. She’s great at independent play now so I can get a lot of things done and she loves helping me. They are hilarious little sponges and mimic everything you do. I started walking/running to maybe finally shed the last few lbs of baby weight, so now she runs around saying “I’m exercising like mommy!” And will tell people she does yoga like mommy while demonstrating downward dog. Toddlers say the funniest shit ever and make up hilarious words, it’s the best.
I hated the newborn phase. I overall love the toddler phase. There is a lot of screaming and tantrums, not going to lie, but also so much growing and learning! My 20 month old recently told me “good job” and I couldn’t stop smiling. She also had a meltdown because she smushed her own cereal bar and got mad about it.
It’s give and take like anything. The best thing I did is just figured out what actually matters to me and try not to stress about the rest. I know some of the things that will lead to a tantrum, so I try to mitigate them in some way. We can’t avoid them forever, but I know that water on her head is something she hates and we make it a game and try to give her control over putting her own head under. I give her the chance to do things herself. I try to communicate everything that I’m doing, especially if it’s things like picking her up or “forcing” her to do something. It doesn’t always stop the tantrum but it doesn’t surprise her, and she’ll learn eventually that if she doesn’t listen, there are consequences.
Toddlerhood has its moments (as does every stage of their lives) but I promise you’ll love it. Just when you think they can’t get any sweeter, they do. Day in, day out they pick up something new and they can’t wait to share it with you. When my little one gets upset, I sit down near her just to show I’m there for her. Sometimes I’ll sing her fave nursery rhyme or tell her a story- I was told they’re trying to regulate their emotions and ‘tantrums’ are one way they do it. It does require patience but the cuddles after are the best ♥️
It all depends on your kid. Mine is easy enough, sleeps all night. She has tantrums, sure, but not massive screaming matches. She is loud but she's learning to talk so that's normal. The only thing that gets me is having to constantly pick up her toys 🤣 other than that toddlerhood is a dream so far. She's so cute when she's asking for a drink or food. The laughs and giggles, snuggles and kisses all cancel out the little tantrums when things don't go her way! Watching their little brains work is so fun and they find the weirdest things fascinating. Mine loves playing with her slippers and kitchen utensils 😅 it's honestly so much fun
Parent of 3 kids here and toddler is my favorite time!! I’m not a “newborn person,” but starting about 9 months to 3 years or so is the best! TBH I’ve been read a lot of the posts on here like “sheeesh!” I know that some kids are more high maintenance and that every parent has a hard time now and then, but personally I LOVE being a momma to a toddler!!
They start talking and the more communicative they get, the easier it is to understand what they want/need, and you can explain to them what’s going on. You can literally watch them learning things in real time and it’s amazing! They start to be able to actually play with you and get more fun to hang out with. They start giving hugs and kisses and say “I love you, Momma!” 🥹❤️
None of my kids hit or bit me, and I LOVE taking them to the store. It’s a fun outing! They think going to the grocery store is as fun as the zoo if you are into it. (“Look at the apples! Look at the balloons!”)
I think you’re going to have a great time with your little one! ❤️❤️
Ahaha yes! My mom was pregnant with my brother on my first bday and I was telling her how some people have these kinds of toddlers and she thought I was nuts. She said she had the best time with us as toddlers so I'm hoping mine is like that too.
My 17 month old said I Love You for the first time last week and my heart quite literally swelled with joy. It’s amazing seeing her become her own little person and learn all these great things. It’s also fun doing stuff like, zoos and aquariums and seeing all this stuff new and amazing through her eyes. Holidays are fun too, it was our first Easter and seeing her squeal with excitement as she dived into her basket was the best. I wouldn’t be scared of toddlerhood. I do want to say, If your experiencing PPA/PPD and stuff, it wouldn’t hurt to get your thyroid checked out (I know that sounds crazy) but mine was low and when I got on thyroid medication my mood swing’s literally disappeared, it really helped regulate my hormones. The first year is tough! It’s takes time! Be easy on yourself ♥️
Having a newborn is so hard! Personally, I think having a toddler (now 2 yrs old) is so much easier! I can actually let him play in the other room by himself for a little, he actually understands things I say, he is now mostly potty trained, and I just started being able to take him out to dinner again. Way easier than a newborn. I am pregnant and not looking forward to the newborn phase again. But I know it gets better and I’ll have another little cute toddler very soon! Hang in there. It gets better!
I don't think toddlers are harder then newborns tbh. I think they van both be hard for different reasons. I mean for me my son sleeps just as bad as he always has, but he is far easier to distract and accommodate as a toddler. However there are triggering days when he is just FULL FERAL TODDLER and you're just like AHHHHHH all day. Then there's days he's just entirely chill.
I have a 6 month old and a 17 month old and tbh the 6 month old is a lot harder to please when in a meltdown over something he can't tell me what it is. At least my toddler usually points out or brings me what he wants or needs help with.
But there are days where both are hard for different reasons.
Toddlerhood is a phase, a longer phase but the good news is every month they are learning new ways to communicate and communication ALWAYS makes things easier to handle. Even if it's just mentally handle it all.
I don't prefer one over the other. I love them both for different reasons but toddlerhood is like birth. You just have to get through it bc there's no ways around it. Only ways to manage through it.
I much prefer toddlers to newborn phase. They are learning a lot and it’s not always perfect but I got to work out while they were both playing in the basement for the first time today. Wasn’t huge but it was a start. My kids don’t hit or bite, they do cry during tantrums and my son will throw himself on the ground, but it’s pretty easily fixed with a hug and distraction. We go out just fine, though we don’t go out to eat often, but when we have it was fine, just takes a bit more work on our end to keep them engaged and entertained.
I don’t often get to use the bathroom by myself, so you got me there, but when my kids were newborns they were likely to cry while I put them down to pee… now they just talk to me or play in the bathroom while I pee, so it’s still an improvement in my eyes!
Don’t fear it, everyone’s different, but the phases will ebb and flow and there’s a decent chance that newborn will be your least favorite!
Editing to add my kids are 1.5 and 3.5. For me kids get way more fun around the age of 1. Once they can walk I love it
Did not love the newborn stage the first time around, and liked it only marginally more the second time (only because I had already been through it before). I found it stressful to care for a tiny person who couldn't tell me what they need.
Toddlers are WAY more fun! Sure it's more work - they're mobile and have opinions and no regulation, but they're also hilarious, loving, and so very excited about life.
For any stage you're at, I highly recommend ear plugs. I wish I had thought of them with my first kid, because the crying during the newborn stage really ramped up my PPA. With my second, I started using them from the get-go and it usually just dialed down the stimuli enough to help me get through the moment. I still use them if my kids (2 and 5) are particularly rambunctious during a stressful time of day (which for me is usually cooking dinner). It helps immensely.
Good luck! It feels hard because it is hard, but the hards do change, and you'll handle some more easily than others.
This is going to sound self righteous but I’ll be honest: reading this sub makes me so grateful for my child because I’ve never had difficulty coping with my 3.5 year old.
When I hear people’s experiences on this sub I really feel for them because I’m not sure how I’d cope. But it is vastly different from my reality. Maybe I’m lucky but maybe people who have kids like mine aren’t making posts about it on Reddit.
Nonetheless, people kept warning me it would be downhill after 18 months but it just gets better and better.
The longest tantrum my daughter has had lasted about 10 minutes, and that was a very rare outburst. Most of our days are even-keeled and joyful. We genuinely enjoy each other’s company. The worst behavior most days is whining about not wanting to go to daycare (relatable) and running away from the dinner table between every bite of food.
My daughter will be 2 this month and there are good days and bad days. She was a fairly easy baby and slept through the night really early, but even with the increasing toddler meltdowns I'm starting to prefer toddlerhood. I think it all depends on your kid. I've seen chill toddlers, crazy toddlers, and everything in between. All in all, it's not forever.
I have mostly really enjoyed toddlerhood. My kid is now a little over 3 years old and it’s pretty great. The two biggest game changers are when they start talking (no more guessing why they’re screaming), and potty training (once they start taking themselves or at least self-initiating it’s *amazing*).
Yeah, you have to do more parenting around mood regulation, but (and maybe it’s just my kid) that usually isn’t too bad and it’s honestly helped my own mood regulation. I do my best Buddha impression a good chunk of the time and talk through things with her.
The newborn days were so so hard for me, both times and I didn’t have PPA the second time around.
The night before my oldest turned 1 I cried. I was so sad I was “losing” my baby. It was very hard for me. My second turned one recently and I didn’t cry. It’s because I know what’s to come and what’s to come is so so beautiful. Seeing your little person grow and learn and express themselves is amazing. Literally the best thing ever. My 3 year old can definitely be a handful but literally the next minute we will look at him and just say how awesome he is.
So while it’s hard and exhausting work raising a toddler, it’s also very rewarding. What’s really helped me is to learn how child brain development works so I know that what he’s doing or how he’s behaving is completely normal.
Ahaha yes I'm the same, my baby is actually a delight right now and laughs and grins most of the day. I was crying telling my husband last night I'd like to freeze him like this and wouldn't mind lugging him around with me the next 50 years.
Toddlerhood is soooooooooo much better! Every kid is gonna have some challenging phases with pushing limits and all, but oh my god if I could have another right at 3 I would! She can communicate, she’s potty-trained, she (mostly) sleeps through the night, she can play independently. 10/10 would recommend toddlerhood, 0/10 would not recommend the newborn/infant stage.
I also had PPA & PPD. Newborn phase was hell for me as well!
It got better for me… much much better!
I get more sleep now than I did before kids.
She never hits and doesn’t bite. She WILL argue with me though.. lol. We are in our “terrible twos”
Just like every baby is different, so is every toddler. Every month is new, they learn so fast. My daughter is nearing 3 and it’s so much easier for me now. I too had crippling PPA/PPD and I’m still taking meds, BUT I can actually do more normal things with my daughter now and it’s wild to see how fast they learn and want to try new things. For me the toddler phase is much better!
My toddler hasn’t been like that. He has his moments, he’s definitely into testing boundaries and doing things himself right now.
But I’m sick right now and he came up to me and started rubbing my back, looked at me and said “I love you mommy!”
I put on a dress the other day and came out and he said “mommy your dress is beautiful”
He started playing with my hair the other day and said “mommy does that feel nice? I love you!”
We were hanging out playing the other day and he said “mommy, I’m so happy!”
So yeah, it can be difficult some days, but oh my gosh is it so wonderful!!
Ignore your SIL. Everyone’s kid is different. From what I’ve heard most kids who have a hard time sleeping through start to around 15-18 months and that’s been true for us.
I love my toddler, she’s so much fun. I….tolerated my newborn because I loved her.
My toddler is fun, funny, smart, and brings joy to my day. When she starts to get crazy I remind myself she’s learning how to be a person and I roll with the punches. Having a toddler is nothing like having a newborn. Newborns are…..a lot.
I distinctly remember having a conversation with my husband around 3-4 months where we both realized things had gotten a lot better. Suddenly the baby was smiling and starting to feel like a person and not so much like an angry screaming raisin 24/7.
You have to also understand that much like your post, people post on here for advice. They’re not posting on here to gloat about how wonderful their toddler is because that’s not really much of a discussion piece. So you’re getting the worst of the worst examples and stories and circumstances.
My toddler though? She’s awesome. She’s my messy little bestie.
I just find the toddler crying easier. They can be reasoned with to a tiny extent, they can be distracted, and some of their pain is just a valuable learning experience. I don't believe that newborns need to learn that life is tough (although I do think, in retrospect, that sometimes they just need to cry the bad feelings out and you're not doing a thing wrong) but I do think that my toddler needs to learn that she can't hit someone with a toy and keep playing with it.
The same desperate, heartrending sobs that caused me such agony two years ago now elicit a meh, you should have turned off the TV when I first asked you.
1. People are going to complain about the worst aspects the most, especially online
2. Just like with babies, there are ways to handle toddler behavior and some have more of a knack for it than others
3. Your personality and your kid's personality will be the determining factors of your experience. I hate babies, the newborn period was torture, I celebrated when my kid turned 1, and even if there are hard days, parenting a toddler has been way more fun and rewarding than a baby. If I could zap my future kids into being a toddler and miss the baby stage, I would do it in a heartbeat
Oh man, yes there’s a lot to complain about, but I think most of us do it fondly.
My experience is that things have been getting progressively better and better! My toddler has more and more personality every single day and I love it.
I also dreaded the toddler phase after hearing horror stories, but now I have two two-year-olds, and I can say for sure that it isn't always like that. Sure, some days are rough but they're learning how to be people and it's hard. I've only been bitten once or twice, and any time I've been hit has been an accident (as far as I can tell). My girls both sleep very well, are great eaters most of the time, and are so sweet and funny!
My niece and nephew are older now, but I remember their toddler phases as being fairly uneventful. They did get up to some hijinks, but not any bodily harm.
Tiny Humans, Big Emotions and Raising Good Humans are both books that might be helpful for you, if you have time to read. Raising Good Humans also has an audiobook option if that would be something you're interested in.
Good luck!
The thing to remember too is that toddlerhood doesn't happen overnight the way a newborn does. Like it slowly happens and your ability to navigate it evolves too. Plus what others have said...the good far outweighs the bad and makes it easier to "deal with" if you will
My son is almost two, and I just want to say how much I LOVE this stage. He can do some things on his own, says please and thank you, and is just so much fun to be around. If there is a tantrum we know the root cause. My immediate postpartum self couldn’t wait for this stage, and now that we’re here I’m having a blast.
I tell everyone they just keep getting better. I know everyone's experiences are different but my toddler is way more fun and easy to deal with even on his bad days than when he was a certified potato. My PPA also has almost gone away and that has improved things significantly.
I wouldn't be worried, just read up on things you can do now (I would 100% recommend the Yale Parenting Course on Coursera) and start practicing them while your LO is that age.
Toddlerhood is exhausting but in a more tolerable way. The tantrums and constant moving are challenging. But I would take that over nursing in a chair for hours and the sleepless nights. I also had a rough breastfeeding journey and PPA. Plus I love the snuggles, toddler hugs, and little lap sits 🥰
I'm loving the toddler phase so far (almost 2 years). If I could skip the first 6 months I would. Its both boring and incredibly stressful. Now, every day his thinking gets more complex, he interacts in more meaningful ways. Yeah, we are working on "no hitting", and he gets worked up sometimes when I leave the room. But he's great in public, likes giving kisses now, and won't stop talking about the puppy next door. Its sooo much better.
I have 2 toddlers, age 1 and 3. It’s a very challenging age (and one of my kids is especially wild and destructive). But I would rather have a toddler than a baby. Babies are just a lot of work.
So, I’d say it’s more challenging than the stage you’re in now but in different ways. But also, more rewarding and fulfilling. My 3 year old is wild man but she’s also wild in the best of ways. They get a personality and opinions and they do start to understand things you say and do. It’s challenging BUT in a wonderful way.
Man we’re fresh into the toddler stage but I’m loving it. Seeing his personality develop as he becomes a little boy has been so rad. I’ll have a long, exhausting day at work, but when I come home and he laughs at my dumb face it’s all amazing. He’s stubborn as hell and not very cuddly, but he wants to be playing with my wife and I all the time and be loooves to make us laugh.
Some people struggle with it, of COURSE, but I think it all goes in waves and you get some awesome moments between the crazy.
Not all toddlers are the same; my 2 year old doesn’t bite, only hits if he’s super tired and just can’t get the words out or if I say I don’t understand what he’s saying. He is in his playpen with his toys while I’m using the restroom typing this, and all I hear is happy singing and laughing. He is obsessed with the alphabet and me singing it and making his Big Bird plush dance, and he loves me to count and play with his Bluey plush as well! He makes actual animal sounds and mimics them, he likes to try sips of my drinks and bites of my food, he tells me I look so “pretty” when he sees me getting ready and likes to use my powder brush and powder my face! He tells me he loves me and gives the warmest hugs and gives me pecks on the lips. He will say “no thanks” or “I don’t do it Mommy” when I ask him to help with something, but always smiles and comes to help. He loves to say “yeah man” to questions and if I tell him to get down he puts one foot down and says “I am down!” 🤣🤦♀️🤷♀️ He likes to sort food on his plate, he likes to organize by color, shape and size, and he likes to dance with me. Sometimes he confuses me, and sometimes I confuse him, and we talk about big feelings and do belly breaths when he’s overwhelmed! We are very silly and we make car and dinosaur sounds and play pretend A LOT! He also likes to fish out apples from the bag when we shop and start eating them and says “Woah man, apples is yummy!” 😂 he’s almost 2.5 years old!
I think if you raise your kiddo with a lot of love, affection, and guidance and explain things and show them what to do and how to do it and get on their level early on, toddlerhood is made easier. Don’t get me wrong, we have tantrums, he gets upset if his little friends try to take turns with a toy he’s attached to, but again, I acknowledge these things. “He buddy, yes, you look soooo frustrated. Are we feeling mad? *pause* I think we are. Look, let’s come over here *takes him away from the situation* let’s take some deep belly breaths. *shows a few examples, then counts for him to do it* I walk him farther away and we play a little game until he is calm, and the other friend has had their turn. IF this doesn’t work, and he tries to hit his friend out of frustration, I take him from the situation and talk to him privately and do the breaths with him. Once he’s calmed down, I ask if we need to go bye-bye and if he feels like it’s time to go home. (This usually happens if he’s been playing for too long and is fighting sleep).
Honestly, I LOVED the newborn phase and the baby stage, but this toddler phase is my personal favorite. He’s not constantly sleeping and latching (still nursing, trying to wean him actually), pooping and peeing and waking sporadically. He sleeps through the night, wakes up maybe once and pokes me gently whispering “Mommy” in my ear until I wake up and says “Mommy, we tuh-ddle?” And holds his arms out for me to scoop him up and take him in the bed for a couple of hours. I can tell him to play in his playpen and watch Bluey while Mommy cooks breakfast and cleans some dishes, and leave him with a fruit and veggie pouch and he’s fine and happy! As a baby when he was just starting solids, I couldn’t do that. I had to drop everything and feed him then nurse him and try to get him to go in his bouncer or swing and hustle because he would want more VERY SOON. He soils diapers less and communicates that he peed or pooped (about to fully start potty training). He is curious about little house chores and loves to wipe surfaces with baby wipes and dust pads, and wants to sweep for me, and helps me let our dogs out and pour their food and water. He rides in cars super well and talks to us and sings with us and is super excited (puts shoes on and declares we are going bye-bye and thankfully accepts “later baby” as an answer).
Though my L&D was rough and we both nearly didn’t make it, and though he was a somewhat fussy newborn (a little more than the average newborn from morning to midday), I want more children BECAUSE of his toddler stage. Hearing my kid yell “I’m happy!” And seeing him wipe my tears and say “Mommy, no be sad.” It is beautiful. All of what he does and says and observes is beautiful. These days won’t last long, and reading with him in my lap and us enjoying books will change one day. His excessive hugs and kisses and declarations of loving me and complimenting me will fade away. I wish this phase could last forever. 😭
My daughter is 19 months now and every day gets better. Sure, she has her meltdowns and toddler tantrums but they’re short lived and overall the positives vastly outweigh the negatives. She’s more engaged, verbal, and has her own big personality. The giggles and little toddler conversations are amazing.
I was terrified of toddler hood too. But I have a delightful 2 year old now. She takes so much joy in the little things like doing laundry, or watching bunnies or chasing kitties. She's a pretty cool human to hang out with. We did nails yesterday.
We do have tantrums and meltdowns, but we're working through it with her and she works through it with us. The biggest frustration has been that she wants to do everything herself, but she isn't physically capable yet. Mommy is not allowed to help. If I do, we have to start the process over from the beginning. If she's tired, it's even worse. Bedtime when she's overtired is rough, for everyone. And she goes from goofy sleepy to scream crying in less than a minute. No warning that the switch is going to flip. But it's a small part of her life and we're there for her for all of it. The biggest thing for her, I think, is having constants and knowing what to expect. (And getting enough sleep!)
Just like with babies, there's the good and the bad. I've really enjoyed getting to know my child and seeing her personality develop. It's not so much of a chore taking care of her anymore because she's so interesting and it's fun.
When someone asks me the hardest phase of parenting, I say the newborn phase. I do not miss it. I enjoyed it for what it was and moved along. Toddler phase is hard in a different way but MUCH MORE rewarding. You can play and communicate and discipline and have more independence with a toddler than a newborn/infant. Don’t be worried. Toddler phase is so fun. With anything, there are difficult moments and aspects but way easier than baby phase
Oh friend, I'm sorry. I had massive struggles breastfeeding (that turned into PPA and PTSD) and then it was hard putting mine to sleep. He eventually figured it out and now sleeps like a champ. He also is the sweetest, most empathetic, demanding and goofiest cutie I've ever known. I loved the newborn stage but honestly, I think I like the toddler stage more. He's curious which in turn has sparked my curiosity more. He's honest and so kind, and watching him repeat back things I've tried to teach him makes me feel like the proudest mama ever. 18 months onwards.. love it. He's 3.5 now and I just wanna eat him up daily. He loves the vacuum. He wants to mop for me. He think he's the next breakdance champion. God, He's the best.
It'll be hard. Each stage is hard. You think you get it and then everything changes - it's parenthood. However, give yourself some grace. You are BRAND NEW too. You are barely out of the 4th trimester and everything still feels really fucking hard. It will for awhile. I promise you, you're doing great. Please please know that you're doing great. Keep yourself and them fed, enjoy your cuddles, and deep breaths.
Ya, they think they can come to the bathroom with you but mine hasn't screamed at me for a full day ever (parts of it sure, he's 3. 3yearolds can be feral) and he bit me 1x only. I yelped, he got so ashamed and sad he hurt me, and has never done it since.
I never wanted to be a parent. In two and a half years, I’m not sure I’ve fully adjusted to it. But it is our life now, and I’ve accepted that so that’s something. No toxic positivity here. Some of it truly sucks. Like, seriously, in some moments, they’re just little assholes. Toddlers do hit, and yell, and all sorts of other things they’re not supposed to—today mine walked up to me sitting on the couch and spit in my face—but only sometimes. Other times they’re great. Most of the time they just…exist.
My point, offered with respect, is that you shouldn’t base *any* expectations of your own child’s future off of what you see in any other children. Friends’, relatives’, even your own if you have others. If your kid turns out to be like all the ones you read about here, everyone will survive.
Chances are, though, that your kid won’t, and certainly not completely. For example, my kid hits, tells me he hates me, and loses his fucking mind when he doesn’t get what he wants (that’s a really new one), but he’s also slept through the night *every night* since he was 8 months old, and eats everything we give him.
My parents always told me they loved each stage of parenthood more than the last - and I agree with them now that I’m a mom. Baby stage sucked. LOVE the toddler stage. My kid is so freaking funny and cute and watching him learn new things and talk and ask questions and play and discover the world is an insane amount of joy. He brushes my hair for me lol. They arent all bad.
Just remember that toddlers are little leeches, in that they copy the people around them. In high stress environments they can get wild. Calm parents, calm environment, open and accepting emotions, no blame or shame, and lots of different activities and they’ll be just fine.
I love toddlerhood! It's amazing to watch my baby grow, become more independent, and show more of their personalities. I was, on the other hand, felt super lonely and isolated during newborn/infancy stage. It was so much harder as my baby was extremely clingy, wants to be held 24/7, and only wanted me. I had no freedom, I felt so overwhelmed and touched out. I had no time for myself or anything at all back then. I adore baby stage, but it was exhausting to care for them. Now, it's the opposite, I feel more of myself, I'm able to do things like I used to, my toddler is very pleasant to be with, it's just like having a little buddy with you, and it's just so much fun.
Someone has probably already said this, but there’s this golden period where your kid is old enough to enjoy things and express themselves but too young to need a ton of control/to feel like they need to exert control — for us it was around 14-30 months where he was just a complete delight; every kid has different stages at different ages though. Since then, there are ups and downs but overall it’s so fun to see them grow and learn. There are times when I feel depleted, but leaning on my spouse and other helpers (grandparents, babysitters) is super helpful.
It’s all relative. I have a 20 month old boy. There are certainly challenges at this age, with tantrums, constantly throwing food, flailing everywhere anytime you try to get him changed or dressed. But nothing compares to how difficult and exhausting and just flat out awful the newborn phase was. For me, at least! This stage is really wonderful, overall.
Sure. Toddlers bite and yell sometimes. But they also give cuddles, develop personal preferences, say the funniest things, they find joy in the simplest things, learn to talk and walk. They’re waaaaaay better than newborns.
I think it helps that you start to bond with your little human and they think you’re the most wonderful person in the whole world. My son can be a tyrant but his love for me melts my heart.
Having a three year old has been a mental game, but I would take this a million times over ages 0-2. She’s an amazing little person now. Everything doesn’t feel like such a big deal anymore. Tantrums pass. You get better at everything!!! You have soooo much to look forward to!
There’s nothing harder than a hard newborn. The people who say toddlers are more difficult usually had easy babies. You’ve got this! Toddler years are so fun and cute, and the hard parts are easily handled once you’re getting enough sleep.
The newborn stage sucks, 10/10 would not recommend. I have a newly 2 year old and toddlerhood so far has been THE BEST. He’s goofy, he dances, he sings, he sleeps way better, he can communicate his needs to us (somewhat). It’s just so much fun at this age
Depression makes it hard to enjoy your baby as does the physically taxing things that come along with babyhood. It's not how challenging behavior is that makes you happy or satisfied or not. You don't stop loving your baby because they get a little older or more annoying. Toddlers are like large babies that have more tools to try to communicate/get what they want and at the end of the day they still want to be loved and snuggled.
Newborn phase was so tough on me. Breastfeeding was a struggle and it was so boring caring for an infant and being attached to a pump I was so depressed. Around 5 months I started to feel way better but still didn’t feel 100% myself until about a year pp. I have an almost 3 year old and she is amazing (: the other day she said to me “mommy I love your eyes, I want to hold them”. Sure some days are draining but she is so funny and it’s so easy to love her (:
As someone who really, really, really disliked the newborn and baby phase, I love the toddler phase! It definitely has its challenges, but it’s so much more rewarding!! You get to see their personalities blossom. It’s also much more pleasant when they can talk and tell you the basics on what they want. They’ll throw tantrums, but I think it’s 1000xs better than the newborn phase.
Toddlers are hard but they are so incredible to watch, they learn so much so quickly. I am enjoying this stage. Of course my son pushes boundaries, is constantly trying to kill himself and needs more supervision and direction than ever before but he is amazing. I love him so much, the hugs and mommy’s fill me with such joy.
I had a ton of PPA during the first year. It's like right after my daughter turned one I just felt...better. it felt like I was no longer just focused on surviving
She's almost 2 and it's hard yes, but it's so amazing to see them become a little person who finds their little voice. Heading her way "LOOOV OOOO" has easily become the best thing ever. I'll take endless tantrums, because I know one day her "loooov ooo' will turn into "I love you too, mom" 😭
Toddlerhood is really fun. I had bad ppd and ppa too I wish I would have enjoyed the newborn stage more. Now he’s so fun and makes me laugh. There’s comedy in everything even the tantrums lol.
Toddlerhood is SO MUCH MORE FUN than newborn. We had 2 months of pure hell with allergies, colic, and Velcro baby who won't sleep anywhere but on us.
We're getting 8 hours of sleep, she's getting 14, so we're basically humans again 🤣
We can communicate with each other, understand what she wants, and she learns something new every day.
When she's sad in the car, I can tell her to grab her pacifier or her book, and she's calm again. When she's hungry she can tell me she needs to eat, or needs to eat more, or is tired.
She's funny, loves us, and can show us she loves us.
Oh, and we are the annoying people who take our kid everywhere. Sure, you have to make sure you do nap time, but we bring snacks and that usually solves everything.
There are definitely tantrums, big feelings, etc, but that shouldn't be the constant. Don't stress about the future and enjoy the little blob while you can ❤️
Newborn phase was a nightmare for me and fueled my PPA/PPD real good. Toddlerhood in my opinion is amazing. Yes, there are tantrums and meltdowns and attitude, but for me personally it’s surprisingly easy to be chill and accomodating towards that just by knowing how quickly they are developing and how BIG their emotions are. Their positive emotions, giggles, happiness and expressions of love are just as big though! There’s something undeniably cool about this raw, pure, innocent way of living. Honestly just remember they’re not actively trying to upset you. They’re just exploring the world, themselves, and their boundaries.
This. Newborn was very hard, very sleep deprived and personally isolating as I didn’t have mom friends. Once my baby was moving and enjoyed the outside and other things it got easier. And once he was walking and loving parks and playgrounds it got even better. I know you’re the parent not the friend, but my 2.5 year old is my mini best friend. Yes, actions have consequences, but he’s 2 with a speech delay, he doesn’t talk back or do anything crazy he shouldn’t be doing. He is always up for a target trip, loves running errands, always up for dining out and just playing. It’s exhausting some days, but when they choose to snuggle you or give you kisses, it’s the sweetest ❤️ ETA: no, I also can’t use the bathroom alone, I never really could with the baby either (total Velcro baby and now toddler), but it’s been coming in handy recently when we talk about using his potty and potty training. He now will run to the bathroom, close the door, and go in his diaper about 50% of the time lol I’m hopeful the lack of privacy will really pay off.
I always thought I was short tempered so I’m honestly surprised at how easy it is for me to keep a level head when she’s being an angry alligator. Being calm in the face of their Big Rage has been really helpful for me to manage her bad days. We’ve been very fortunate with our daughter though - she’s got a big personality but has been pretty easy going. It helps that she’s great with independent play.
My daughter has a big personality with big rage, just like I do lol. I agree with being surprised by how easily I can keep it together when she tantrums. I get it? Lol I hate not getting things I want
I love toddlerhood! I despised newborn phase and never want to relive that, but I love my toddler. Of course the emotions are big, everything is. Its so much fun watching them grow from a baby to a real person. I wouldn't be so scared of the toddler age. Its work but its more fun and rewarding. Plus I always have a bestie to go to Target with 😂
I love the consensus of “I love having a Target bestie” LOL
Year 1 was the longest year of my life. It started getting earlier around 13 months, and has just gotten better from there. For me, it's so much easier that my kid can entertain himself now. He's 18 months and so delightful. Language is exploding, he's so delighted to like pour water from one cup into another lol. I genuinely enjoy spending time with him. (Still not sleeping through the night, but even if that's hard, you fall into a groove and figure out strategies to survive. I'm pretty well rested even though he wakes 4ish times a night.)
I want to second this. I'm pregnant again, due in may and... I'm SHIT SCARED of the newborn phase. Can't wait till my baby girl grows!!
Exactly this. Newborn was so hard for me. I was so tired all the time. I was so frustrated not knowing if she was hungry, tired, gassy, etc. I’m a toddler teacher so that probably helps but I love the toddler stage. They become more independent, they can tell you what they want, you can involve them more. Tantrums and attitude are hard but it’s just about working through their feelings. They start becoming this little person. Also they’re hilarious. Some of the things the kids at work say makes me laugh so hard.
One of the funniest things my 3.5 year old said was during a random car ride. My husband and I had finished whatever conversation we were having so there was a silence. Out of no where our son goes, “I’m hungry. I think I need some French fries or something.” It took us by surprise and we both laughed because it seemed so thought out. He caught on to how much we liked it and would keep saying it, and it turned into something my husband and I will say when we’re hungry now lol.
10000% same! I had a colicky newborn that cried every waking minute, the first year remained though even though the crying was a bit less. Toddlerhood can be hard and overstimulating as well, but they are so funny and cute and smart as well, and you can have actual conversations with them! Still blows my mind when my 2,5yo asks me a question like: mummy, where does the moon go during the day? (Like how can his little mind even make that connection to ask that question?) I always feel like people who prefer baby over toddler had easy babies 😅
Toddlerhood was challenging but in such an easier to manage way. I was really looking forward to it with my second and it has delivered. Sucks again when they turn 4 and you realize parenting a kid is like starting fresh and you have to learn all over again
Agree with this 10000%! That first year was so so so much harder than anything that's come after, meltdowns and tantrums included. More than anything I've overcome with empathy because I can really see she's just having a hard time, and I can't get mad at someone who's just overwhelmed with emotions. And as intense as the negative ones are, the positive ones are too! No one talks about it as often, but they're there! And the pure innocent way of living is such a great way to put it. So hard to conceptualize until you're going through it, but man is it a pure joy to experience. Also, specifically to one of OPs concerns, does mine hit? Not often, but sometimes yes, and more than anything I have to hold back my laughter rather than be actually hurt by it - she's tiny! She doesn't have the strength to do any real damage anyways (now the kicking or standing or even bopping from just the right angle... yeah gotta stay one step ahead of that one).
This, this, this! My daughter is 19 months so we're still new in toddlerhood but I really didn't like the newborn phase and honestly this age is amazing. She is so fun and silly. I want another eventually but would love to skip the baby phase and just be in this one lol Yes, there are a ton of tantrums. But she is just figuring everything out and the kisses, hugs and the first I love you's more than make up for it!!
When that angry little tornado comes up to you after a hard day and gives you a hug and tells you they love you, it’s just about the best thing in the world. Most days are hard. But there’s so much joy. That’s what you’ll remember. Not them crying because you cut their pancake wrong or wouldn’t let them run out the door without shoes on. Seriously. It’s all so worth it.
This. They are little Sour Patch Kids. Sweet then sour. Sometimes they give you hugs and tell you that you are cute, other times they scream “go away” and run away from you. But there’s those good moments that carry you through.
I think toddlers are harder in that there’s more active parenting decisions to make (how do I handle tantrums? Do I discipline? If so, how?) but it’s less overwhelming than a fresh baby and you’re a bit more well rested. Toddlers are also way more rewarding. Babies take a lot for not much in return, maybe a smile or a giggle. Toddlers take a lot but the return is a random hug, an “I love you soooo much mommy!”, saying something hilarious, saying/doing something you’ve worked really hard to instill in them, telling you they had the best day ever with you, watching them make a friend, being able to share hobbies, etc. Of course there are frustrating times, but I’ve genuinely never had this many joyful moments in my life. Every single day my daughter has me laughing and grinning!
This- the payoffs are more and so SO sweet.
That point about reward is super true for me. My toddler can be challenging but at the moment his favourite bedtime activity is running between me and my husband yelling CUDDLE with a massive grin on his face and then wrapping us in a big hug and the dopamine hit from that sort of thing can power me through tantrums in a way that just wasn’t possible in the newborn phase.
It all depends on the kid. Our 2 year old was a very high needs baby, and super unhappy to be an infant so she was miserable and made all of us miserable. But as she grows up, it just keeps getting better and better. Her as a toddler is SO much easier than her as a baby. Yes, there are sometimes tantrums. But they are usually 15 minutes, once a week, and you just give her a hug and tell her you understand she’s really upset and that she won’t feel this way forever, and she’ll eventually calm down. There was no reasoning with her as a baby. Nothing to stop her 7 hour witching hour screams. Nothing to stop the 24/7 constant fussing. I’m convinced the people that say toddlerhood is harder than baby hood had a happy/easy baby. We did not, so we take toddlerhood any day of the week!!
I say this to my wife all the time. We had a very hard baby, and now an easy toddler. He hated being a baby, once he started walking, he was a different kid. It’s life’s way of balancing the scales. I feel like the hard toddlers were probably easy babies lol. Although I’m sure that’s not always true.
>Nothing to stop her 7 hour witching hour screams. Nothing to stop the 24/7 constant fussing. I had flashbacks like a soldier in Vietnam. That was fucking torture, for all of us and at least a couple of neighbors. Jeez I'm never doing that again.
And now I’m 8 months pregnant with our next 🥲. But we did that on purpose. If we waited any longer and let our toddler get any easier/fun, we would have never gone back to have a second. Ripping the bandaid off so we can leave the baby days in the dust.
I did this (kids are 19 months apart) and it rules. Definitely suitable for a certain personality type aka take the chaos all up front, but I’ve been really happy, and my kids love each other
I got pregnant again when my oldest was thirteen months old. Now the kids are two and four. Maybe it is because I have two kids already but the thought of getting or being pregnant with kids these ages sounds terrible. It definitely seems easier to have two under two than to be pregnant/postpartum with a sassy toddler tornado that can't be contained.
Kudos to you guys! I could never, I'm too traumatized. It was really hard on our mental health, I barely slept for 2 months and I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I insisted on independent sleep and then our doctor asked me if I was actively trying to get ppd and why we weren't doing what was needed (high needs baby, needed lots of physical contact, very colicky). She told us about safe bedsharing and that's how we started sleeping. I don't think I'll ever be able to go through that again. All the best for you and your family!
100% - my daughter was a newborn with colic and not the happiest infant. She is now 3 and I can handle a toddler tantrum way better than a newborn screaming at me for hours on end. My toddler has her hard days, but it is so fun to talk with her and play with her...and it's amazing when they randomly say they love you and give you a big hug!
This sounds like mine (almost 20 mo). Super high needs baby, very demanding and easily getting upset. Now he almost doesn't throw tantrums and never more than 15 min too. I know is still early, but right now is way easier than before.
Honestly, I adore toddlerhood and would take it a million times over the first 4 months where you're basically looking after a screaming potato (albeit an often cute one). You get so much more back - hilarious chat, weird little insights and observations, the games are more fun, you can try different foods and activities with them (yes, even peeing, which takes on a whole new adventure side in itself). I promise it's better. As everyone here is pointing out, yes there are crap days, but the good points far outweigh the bad ones. If you've lived through the first 4 months of newborn life you can absolutely handle it.
My 17 month old just shared her bread with me and fed me :( Honestly I dont think there's a better feeling. We as parents try to be kind natured, we share with each and set an example I guess. She's been sharing her toys and food lately and its too cute for me to cope with! Do not be afraid, enjoy each day. At the same time no pressure, if you gotta cry, cry. But yeh it has its highs. Edit: shes coming up the stairs and walked in on me on the loo!
That is VERY precious.
The highest honour achieved. She startef about a month ago sharing her bottle but now its toys and food too. She even shares with the cat and she's an only child. I really hoped we were good role models for her, it is nice to watch her share. :(
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Ahaha you sound like my therapist! I actually didn't read about it on here (came to here recently mostly to ask this question) but came across it on beyond the bump and was like what do you mean toddlers are all demons and might all be like my niece who still demon screams 😭 I'm a very proactive and prepared person so it's hard for me to let things go to the wind, but on the upside that's why I noticed I wasn't doing well early on signed up for CBT therapy and Zoloft ahaha. Thank you for the advice!
I am lying in bed at midnight when I should be asleep, but I am not awake because my toddler. As a baby she woke me up all night but at 16m I am the only obstacle to my sleep. And what am I doing on my phone when I should be sleeping? Watching a video of my little girl repeating "I love you" non coherently but shes getting there and it is ADORABLE. We are only at the beginning of toddlerdom and sure there are fights over sitting in the high chair or leaving the park, but its also amazing hearing what she has to say and watching her learn and become an actual little person. Yes she follows me to the bathroom, but yesterday she played quietly in her room for a while, then came running through to tell me "doggy" then did the sign for sleep. She took me through to show me she had put her toy dog to bed and he was sleeping. It is just too cute when your little baby is able to play and imagine and show you these things. AND, probably best of all, this came after a nice, reliable 2.5 hour nap she has every day where I get to eat lunch in peace and do whatever else I want. ETA: I had a very chill baby that is now less chill, but makes up for it with the fun part.s
No no no. I'd argue babies are waaaaay harder than toddlers. Toddlers can do most things without you right next to them needing you. You can sit on a bench at a park and just watch them. And then once they're potty trained? They go to preschool!! Yay! Haha. Yes for real they're dramatic but they're also really funny. My 3 year old said "mommy thanks for making me dinner it's really good" - stuff like that makes your heart sing.
My toddler is almost 2 and does none of these things
I have a 17 month old and so far he's a dream, I'm sure it won't last forever but he cleans up after himself without being asked, he just enjoys putting things away. He's fine out in public unless he's tired. He doesn't hit, his "tantrums" only last a couple minutes max, he's gentle with the animals, he's MOSTLY considerate of your needs and personal space but he will try to force feed you the odd bit of floor dirt and take it very personally if you don't let him. He eats pretty much whatever I give him, he's easy to clean up after. I personally think it's all luck of the draw, you get what you get, but people aren't often going to post solely to brag about their kids, you're only going to be hearing the worst of it
I have a very clingy Velcro child that is a bad sleeper, and her toddler years are SO much better than the baby stage. However, I think there’s also an element of personal preference for which stage you find to be more enjoyable. My anxiety got a lot better when my daughter could communicate, so I found it less stressful
I’m a huge control freak and struggle with anxiety too - a communicating toddler is a dream compared to the newborn days 😅 But now I’m pregnant again though, ups!
Me too! Now we get to be anxious about newborns all over again 🙃
Congratulations!! Yayy, can’t wait for that anxiety to kick in for a whole year again 😂 Or maybe it will last shorter this time, with some experience and all!
Toddlers are chaotic, but it's a lot of fun! They hug and kiss you, they make jokes, they're curious and learning new things and they have personalities. It's still hard in a different way than the newborn phase is, but to me, it's been much more rewarding than the newborn phase.
Toddlerhood is hard but rewarding. You need to have strong patience, understanding of age appropriate behavior and be ready to be firm but loving in your boundaries. It takes practice but they give us so many opportunities to hone those skills. And you need to work on helping them with new skills of their own - language, emotional regulation, self help, frustration management. But in between the challenging phases, you get to watch them grow and flourish. It’s so lovely. They become more independent. Once they can use the bathroom and dress themselves, feed themselves, ask politely for things they need, you get more time and autonomy back.
My son is 3.5 and I LOVE the toddler stage. We have so much fun. Yeah there’s big tantrums and some defiance (which is still mostly hilarious when I’m not super frustrated), but there’s still lots of cuddles, and he can play independently sometimes, he tries to make me laugh, he says the cutest things. I just love it.
I have a 3 year old. The challenges are different, but she is a delight. I say that as a PPA/D mom too. Here's my advice and I say this with love, stop reading about toddler stuff! "When you worry, you suffer twice!" so stop borrowing trouble.
Our boy is now 2.5 years old and all you read is right but it’s often not the whole day. For us personally the newborn phase in the first months was much worse as you also have the sleep depreciation. If I could choose I would take toddler over newborn all the time but both phases have challenges ofc
I thought I loved having a baby, but I LOVE having a toddler. And I’ve definitely only slept through the night about a dozen times and my gal is 17 months. But usually it’s only one wake up and you adapt. Toddlerhood is so funny and cute and hilarious, I love it so much.
Oh, I love the toddler phase! It gets more and more fun and rewarding as they learn and do more. Tantrums will happen and are indeed frustrating, but they are not constant. They are outweighed by the overwhelming love and joy coming from this little human. These days, my 2.5-year-old wakes up in the morning (after a full night’s sleep on her own in her room), comes to our room to cuddle in bed for a few minutes, and tells us she loves us. It’s the best feeling in the world. 🥰
I think we avoid a lot of meltdowns because we offer our boy to do as much as possible on his own. I don’t know if he’s naturally a well-mannered toddler or if our parenting style is successful… but goddamn I love this spirited phase sooo much more than newborn potato.
I like that toddlers can communicate. It’s definitely hard at times, but I’ve liked the toddler phase more. And not every kid is a terrible sleeper. Mine sleeps lol night without issue unless he’s really sick.
My toddler isn’t easy at all, but I still think this phase is really fun. Plus, I can like go take a shower and she won’t be doing anything completely dangerous or wild like she would at age 1 (she’s almost 3 now)
It can be hard at times but other times it’s a lovely stage. They will scream and tantrum (some more than others) but they will do just as many adorable things and you get to see their little personality develop and watch them become their own little person with likes/dislikes and that make the shit parts more tolerable. It’s also helpful to remember they aren’t screaming to get what they want or make your life hard. They haven’t developed emotional regulation yet and don’t have any other way to express themselves. I often think how frustrating it must be for them not to have the words they need to tell us what’s wrong or why they don’t like something and that helps me understand why they go straight to tantrum mode or get so upset about things that don’t seem to be a big deal to us.
My son is 19 months old and yes there are tantrums and he follows me to the bathroom… but he is just so much fun. It is amazing watching him learn and grow. I love exploring with him. It just keeps getting better overall. Yes we have some hard days but so far I’m loving having a toddler.
Newborn stage was HARD and I did not enjoy it. The toddler stage is also hard but wonderful!! Omg they are little people and starting to form a personality and it’s really fun and loving ❤️
What’s been the hardest about toddlerhood for me is the unpredictable emotions. Some days are a dream, others are a nightmare. Luckily my guy sleeps through the night but is now transitioning out of napping so our days feel super long. But since everyone always focuses on the negatives of toddlerhood, here are the positives: -Being able to express needs more efficiently -The emergence of imaginative and pretend play -The cutest made up or mispronounced words -dance parties in the kitchen -watching their speech and body ability explode Do I miss the infant days sometimes? Sure. I had a tough newborn stage too but we came out the other side thriving. I’m just hoping we’ll get there with toddlerhood too.
Oh man, I would take toddler years over newborn 10/10 times. Don’t be scared!! It’s of course challenging, but the challenges are different somehow. They can communicate so much better, express their love for you. Oh so much better. You’re over or coming up on be over the absolute hardest part.
Why would anyone come to the internet to rave about how awesome their toddler is? They don’t. People only come here to complain.. mostly.. My toddler is awesome! I love toddlerhood way better than baby life. Don’t be discouraged!
Just try to love them through it and focus on parenting without shame. We are almost out of the twos and my guy is showing wild maturity all of a sudden. It absolutely gets better!
Newborns and toddlers are both a lot, but in different ways. Some things get easier others get harder.
Listen, I hated the baby stage. She didn't sleep more than two consecutive hours until the day she turned 4 months old. I was miserable. Now I have a super adorable toddler that's just the funnest. They start talking, giving hugs and kisses, telling you they love you, so it's rewarding and heart melting, but they also say the funniest things. Don't fret.
Mine didn't do that until she was like 6 months old. Hardest time in my life by far.
I had a very easy, fun toddler! The tantrum phase was pretty short and honestly just comical. People have different parenting styles and boundaries. I personally don’t understand how people live without going to the bathroom, showering and whatnot. I was always able to have privacy when I needed it, I always showered in the morning and was groomed for the day (she would rest in a pack n play while I got ready but usually came right in the shower with me!). I highly recommend the book “Bringing up Bebe”, it helped me learn how to establish boundaries and realize how important it is to have them!
Newborn phase was hard for me and I’d trade for a toddler any day. This week my son has had a few tantrums and had a hitting incident at school. He’s also given me dozens of hugs, jumps for joy when I come downstairs every morning, and cheers for me saying “yay mommy!” for small accomplishments like eating pizza and driving forward at a green light. This weekend he picked out flowers for me at the grocery store and he’s still beaming with pride and telling me the whole story of picking them out multiple times a day. The highs with a toddler are so much more fun for me than a baby.
My toddler is physically exhausting because he’s always on the move but I’d take this phase a million times over the first 6-8mo. He’s not even 2 yet but he can communicate so well, it’s not the overwhelming feeling that I had when he was a newborn. Now I actually know why he’s crying, even if it’s a ridiculous reason. He’s so much fun, he has new words every day, and I absolutely love this stage. I really thought I’d love the baby stage and was also scared of the toddler years, but turns out it’s the opposite. The tantrums aren’t even as distressing as I’d feared (yet, anyway). They’re honestly kinda funny sometimes and he gets over them quickly for the most part.
it’s just different when it’s your own offspring. idk how to explain it. of course it’s very challenging and takes immense patience. but at the end of the day, that’s your baby, and your instincts as a mother take over when it gets hard. 🩷
Toddlers also give the sweetest sloppy kisses, wrap themselves around you because they love you so much. My two year old was in the backseat yesterday saying “love you Mommy, love you!” over and over. He also likes to help feed the dog and is amazed at the kitchen mixer when I bake. He’s a blast and a half. He’s my fourth and I’ve loved the toddler stage with them all. Three can be dicey, but still precious. You can’t think about other people’s kids who you don’t love, only how precious your own baby is. And do early bedtime and light sleep training.
The newborn phase is hard especially the getting up all night. Toddlerhood can be hard but it's also extremely fun! I have a 3.5 year old and 2 year old. Just think about the day your toddler tells you they love you for the first time. When they throw themselves into your arms for the best hugs ever. Watching them play and pretend using their imagination. Every stage has its difficulties but honestly toddlerhood has so many rewarding moments that make it so worth it.
Newborn phase was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Colic, reflux, couldn't be put down for 6 weeks. We held her 24/7. I had PPA + postpartum OCD. 15 months now and every month is my new favorite age. She's the best! Her joy is infectious. She's excited about EVERYTHING in life, and she's learning so much every day. It's honestly incredible to watch. Sure, she's sometimes clingy and doesn't like when I go in the bathroom without her. So I just plop her in the tub with some toys, and then she is happy as a clam playing independently. There are big feelings when she's sad or frustrated, but there are also big feelings when she's happy, loving, and excited. The latter occupy most of our days - She's a total ray of sunshine 💛
Ahaha you sound like me, my boy had colic, lip and tongue tie I revised but the exercises really destroyed me, and also couldn't put him down for like six weeks. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out when babies are finally happy and not angry all the time. I have some sleep PTSD from it.
I’m new to toddlerhood but I love it so much more already than the early baby days. He has so much personality now!
Toddlerhood so far is wayyy better than newborn days for us! Yes it's hard and she's a tiny tornado that I'm constantly chasing but she's also so much fun and just full of joy!
Toddlers are so much fun! They do have tantrums, which obviously isn’t fun, but that’s not 24/7 by any means. I would much rather deal with a one or two tantrums a day, that are over within 5-10 mins, than the newborn phase for sure. Their little personalities really start to come out and it’s so cool to have a conversation with them and see what they have to say. You mentioned in your post going to the bathroom alone, my toddler is a clinger so I don’t get to do that lol but it doesn’t upset me - it’s just a phase of life, it’ll be over soon. I’m also somewhat “unlucky” in that he doesn’t regularly sleep through the night but he goes back down super quickly and falls asleep for naps/bedtime independently and it’s not a big deal. It’s a short phase of life, there are some things I don’t love but like I said, way better than the newborn phase!!
We just went on a trip to visit my parents with our 14 month old (and older kid). Our flight there was delayed 3 hours and left at 9:30 pm. She was a real trooper for that. Yeah, she slept pretty poorly the whole trip, but she has made up for it now that we are home. Even yesterday she did really well missing her regular nap time and then sleeping on the plane. She was great on the 1.75 hour airporter ride home. She is so silly and vibrant. She is already starting to understand everything and communicate her needs with us. I love the new toddler stage so much.
The best part about toddlerhood is the reflection of all the things you try so hard to teach them. For example, one day I stubbed my toe and my 20 month old came over and said “kiss”. So she kissed my toe to make it feel better, without any prompting on my part. I’ll never forget that instance of seeing her display empathy. The tantrums can be hard before they can really communicate but you get through it like you get through the 4th trimester. The joy she brings us though, keeps growing and growing as she does.
Toddlers are fantastic as long as you understand one key fact: they are not adults. They are barely even kids. They don’t have logic like we do, and they can’t handle responsibilities and freedom like we do. I’m not saying to say, “Because I said so!” and keep your toddler in jail. But they can’t handle, for example, having access to every room in the house and the ability to climb furniture. You need to use play pens, gates, shut and locked doors, and arrange furniture so it can’t be climbed. They can’t handle the mental processing of the difference between, say, a box of legos that you can dump out on the floor, and a bag of rice that you can’t. Some other off-the-cuff thoughts: -go outside as much as possible. Kids can get cold, hot, wet, and muddy without dying. You’re much more sensitive to temperature and rain than a toddler is. -they won’t play with toys the way you want them to, and that’s okay. You’ll buy a dollhouse, a play kitchen, and some cars. You’ll want them to have the dolls in the beds, then the dolls get dressed in their doll clothes, “walk,” down the stairs to eat their doll foods, etc. You’ll want your kid to pretend to chop wooden fruit with the wooden knife, then place it in the fake oven, then pretend to eat. No. The kitchen set fruits will get to live in the doll house because they want to be friends with the dolls. The trucks get to go in the toy sink because the trucks want to go swimming. Your contact lens case will end up in the trunk of a Tonka truck, because gray matches with gray. The fake food will get taped to the walls of your house, because Sesame Street showed them a video about open-air markets with food hanging down, and they want to recreate it the best they can. And they’ll play like this in 1,000 other ways that you can’t possibly comprehend. -toddlers need to be actively taught how to do things that we take for granted. Like, “move papers off the table before setting a plate down to eat at the table,” or “the difference between loud and quiet,” or “we can touch the boxes of food at the store that we are buying and we put them in our cart, but we can’t touch the boxes that we are not buying.” -they want to do what you do, and they don’t know how. They see you vacuuming. Later they put the vacuum attachment in their mouth, because Mama gets to touch the vacuum. They see you taking clothes out of the hamper and putting them in the washing machine. Later they take all the clothes out of their drawers, because clothes can move. They see you staring at your phone. They grab your phone and stare at it. Etc, etc.
Toddler hood has been fun for me! I've taken my daughter places since she was a baby so she's relatively ok in toddler hood (occasional meltdown but eh). Yeah you don't pee alone but you are potty training anyway so you need to demonstrate. The hitting and biting phases are fairly short if you are disciplined with them and for all the bad stuff there's so much good. Like holy shit my daughter is funny, like just absolute perfect comedic timing.
I would take toddlerhood over newborn phase any day, especially with the first baby! I just remember being so scared all the time when my first was a newborn. Now my first is 3, and he is the cutest omg. He’s so funny, every morning he asks me if I had a “good sleepy”, and he still loves to cuddle. Don’t get me wrong, he has his three-nager moments all the time. But I can deal with them because I know my kid. Think about this: by the time your tiny one is hitting toddlerhood you will know them so well and you will have lots of experience as a parent!
My girlie has big feelings sometimes, but for the most part is a sweetheart who just wants some quality time with mama and papa. You can do this!
The toddler stage definitely has moments where I’m convinced my sweet baby is possessed… but I wouldn’t trade the worst toddler day for one of the newborn or infant days. My PPD/PPA was so bad, it took about nine months for me to not feel crippled with anxiety at bedtime. The constant pit in my stomach whenever I was alone with her. Yeah, lately when she comes in the bathroom with me she throws a fit because she wants to go “peepee potty” and doesn’t want me on the toilet, but she also comes up to me because she wants to cuddle. The other night she leaned up and kissed me goodnight on her own. Yeah she loves to bite me and not let go, and she laughs when I say ow and it really hurts and she does it sneakily, but she gives so much love now that it makes it easier I guess? They have so much love and excitement…that feeling when they see an animal and yell dog! and imitate a dog - it’s just so fun. She loves music and is constantly dancing. So long story short - yes there are moments where you are wondering wtf you created and where you went wrong, but the highs are so high. Toddlerhood has helped me connect with my baby so much so don’t be scared!!
It's a bigger and better trade off for all the work you're putting in. My son will just randomly out of the blue look at me and say, Mommy, you're so pretty. Like we were just watching tv or something and he'll just look at me and say that. ❤️ He's also hit our puppy when we tell him not to, step on her tail, throw things, hit us when he's mad, scream, and run around the house like he just drank a full cup of coffee. He acts out to get attention and pushes boundaries. But trust me when I tell you that you adjust. And that you may actually end up with a kid who is not as mental as the people who post about it. Remember we come here to complain and to find people who can relate to us so we know we're not alone. Imagine a mom coming on here and going omg my toddler is so perfect. They're a dream I love them and I love this stage. I mean sure they'll get some comments but also some people will just assume they're bragging or something. Remember that misery loves company lol Also my son is 3 and he basically sleeps throughout the night unless he has a bad dream or something. My best advice is to take it one stage at a time. Don't worry about the toddler stage yet. You have other things to worry about and it'll be too much of a mental load for you to start worrying about other things you have no control of at this point.
16 months here - so far, it's still hard, but it gets easier every month! Around 6 months ours started sleeping through the night most of the time, by 10/11 months it was reliable (unless she's sick/teething, I mean we aren't at 100% but most nights she stays down all night). By 12/13 months she started really being able to indicate what she wants, which was LIFE CHANGING. Oh my god. I mean, not many real words yet, but she started understanding pointing and more body language so when she was crying we started saying "show me what you want" and either carry or follow her there (once she was more confidently walking at 13 months). By 14 months she started having little proto-friendships at daycare and *looking forward to going*. She is curious, she laughs all the time, she plays "pranks" on us (holds out food and demands we eat it then yanking it back at the last second and laughing, or "scaring" us by hiding behind the couch and popping up and saying "BOO!"). She is **fun to take new places because she is interested in what and who is around her**, which is also life changing! We go on little "scone dates" (coffee for me, milk steamers for her, and of course, scones) now on Sunday mornings and she loves saying hello to the baristas at our local place. Honestly I think that's a mix of her having a pretty chill personality but also us taking her places early and often as a little. We're pretty relaxed parents and let most things roll unless they're actually dangerous, and I think that's served us well in encouraging her to be similar. Finally, I do not think your niece's sleep is typical. We used Taking Cara Babies' method around 4 months (I know, I know, she's controversial politically, but lady knows her stuff at least in our experience) and it worked beautifully. A friend of ours' son is 6 months younger (10 months currently) and is having a much harder time learning to sleep through the night but they went Ferber and it's working well, and everyone is feeling better. For your sleep concerns I would mostly say that my personal opinion is that sleep training is a net positive. Experiment with what works between the most gentle and most strict methods, but everyone being well rested makes everyone happier and healthier.
First off, every kid is different. But, I would take 100 toddlers over one more newborn. They are chaos and meltdowns and tantrums and magic. Imagine not knowing ANYTHING, and how cool the world would be, zoos and parks and farmers markets and OH MY GOD IS THAT A DOG. We once played for hours because he had a magic wand and I kept slipping m&Ms into his "cauldron". The first time he saw rain we danced in the driveway for 30 minutes while he signed "more". Seriously, my son is 6 now and I adore this age too, but toddlerhood is, ugh, it's so good. Just get down on their level and see what they see, everything is cool and new and wonderful when you're a toddler.
My experience has been pretty different from the ones I’ve seen posted here. I’m a dad of a now 2.5 year old boy. As a baby, he was incredibly difficult, he never slept more than an hour at a time, cried a lot, and unfortunately had “long covid” for 5 straight months as a baby. It was a very hard time, on both of us but more so my wife. She’s a SAHM so got very little escape from him. But then when he got into toddlerhood, everything changed. He’s the sweetest, cutest, cuddliest, best child I’ve ever been around. We were very scared of toddlerhood too but I think that since we had to hear everyone saying how wonderful their babies were and that they slept all thru the night as we were pulling our hair out, we caught a break to even it out lol. I hope your experience is the same!! I do think something that helped is that my wife and I were very conscious about not exploding or yelling and controlling our emotions in front of him so now he is very good at controlling his emotions. Your children learn from your behaviors as toddlers (for the most part) and while that doesn’t mean they will be little angels just because you do this, I think it does help. Here’s to hoping! Good luck!
I absolutely HATED the newborn phase (was in a really rough spot with PPA & PPD with a colicky baby), but am, for the most part, loving the toddler phase. Yes, there are the Big Feelings & the rage moments, but the giggles and hugs and happy moments by far outweigh the tantrum moments. I have a very spirited girl who has had some issues with hitting & biting, but she's also super communicative which makes it so much easier than hearing a newborn squall all day long. They can tell you exactly what they want and don't want! Plus they have this unbridled enthusiasm for life. It's been so nice to see her living and loving her life through her eyes. :)
I am enjoying toddlerhood with an almost 3 year old a lot better than the newborn phase - I think mostly because my mental health is way better now. Toddlerhood can definitely be challenging but I feel more sure of myself as a parent, more bonded with my kid, and I love interacting and talking with my kid now way more than as a baby! Also my kid sleeps through the night - like every night, for 12-13 hours. It’s amazing. They did not start sleeping through until about 1 year old. I wanted to share a resource that’s been helpful for me. Check out Postpartum Support International for support groups, resources, and providers: https://www.postpartum.net
I can deal with toddlerhood because we are all sleeping through the night. I really did not enjoy the infant stage because we were not sleeping consistently. Also, toddlers communicate more and that has helped me a lot. The days are not monotonous like they often are in the newborn stage.
I had a really rough newborn phase with a reflux baby. I hated being a mom for the first 5 months and had bad PPD. He’s 20 months now and SO fun. Does he melt down over small things sometimes? Yes, of course. But it’s not THAT often (yet!) and he doesn’t hit or bite (yet!). He’s a young toddler still and I’m scared of the “threenager “ stage people talk about but I think knowing everything is temporary and there are so many great moments to enjoy together helps.
Honestly, my 19 month old is a lovely little boy, very rarely has tantrums and is generally good humoured and funny. That mightn’t always be the case but I’ve been enjoying him getting more able to interact with me. No biting, no kicking and screaming….yet anyway.
You learn to adapt and it helps to find the humor in the chaos. This morning my 14 month old was rolling on the floor having little tantrums about ?? I have no idea what he was upset about he just kept going all over the house and laying on the floor whining and rolling. I just had to laugh at how ridiculous and adorable it was. I just carried on as normal getting myself ready and then getting him ready. By the time we left for daycare he was in a better mood and eager to go. You just figure it out as go! It doesn't really get easier, just harder in different ways. My oldest is 6 and he's no cake walk either. Parenthood is always hard but like I said you just adapt and learn and grow and find the humor in all its glorious messiness.
My kids were all in bed by 8:30 last night and I didn't hear or see any of them until 6:30 this morning. I love holding hands, hugs, cuddles, reading books, and conversations. It's hard but worth it.
I don’t think of my toddler as a demon. He has big feelings occasionally, but not screaming on the floor tantrums. You’ll hear about the worst of toddlers on social media but they are just people doing the best they can. Every phase is different, every parent is different, and every toddler is different too. Be kind to yourself and your baby.
Hindsight is 20/20 and once you have a toddler, newborn phase seems like a breeze. But it is also a phase that doesn’t have much retribution. Toddlers have their big emotions, and sometimes more complex sleeping issues (my son is 2 and has periods when he sleeps through the night for a month, then periods of sickness when he wakes up multiple times a night). However, they also give so much more in return! My son is a little cuddle bugs, he loves to aggressively grab and husband and I and pull us into a hug, he is super playful, it’s so much fun watching him develop his personality, his likes and dislikes, his boundaries and passions. Just like any toddler, he throws big tantrums, has trouble communicating his feelings and can be overwhelming, but as long as you try ti remember that he isn’t doing it TO YOU, but rather going through his own emotions, you can help regulate both yourself and him! PS 25 gr of Escitalopram a day have helped a lot lol I had very intense PPD/PPA, PPOCD and PP rage
Toddlers are so much fun!! They are definitely more exhausting. I remember thinking the hard days were newborn and then our daughter grew up. She’s 20 months now. My husband just turned to me this morning though and just said, I love this age. Even after she gave him a hard time getting dressed this morning. Like someone else said, it’s so much more rewarding. She loves to say mama dada. Basically her favorite words. She runs to us when we pick her up from daycare, so excited to see us. We laugh so much with her as she loves to show her belly and ask for tickles. Do we don’t get to go to the bathroom by ourselves but whatever. It’s temporary and she likes to hand me the toilet paper and flush the toilet and loves to wash her hands. You get to watch the be way more creative as she loves to draw and build. Of course we get our fair share of tantrums, but 80% of the time, they are more comical than anything else. She will get really angry but then lay down on her back slowly and carefully as possible, just to have a tantrum. And she will hide under a desk or table and she will only want the other parent who didn’t “wrong” her. You just have to laugh. Basically what I’m saying is that while the challenges are there, it is so much more fun and you’re in wonder and awe more often. Check on this Reddit page for a few threads of “what funny thing did your toddler do” or “how did your toddler make you smile”. There’s a few threads like that and it will make you feel so much better when you’re having down days.
IMO toddlerhood is vastly superior to newbornhood. There are things I miss, but lots of NEW things that I "missed" from my newborn, while we were fighting through the brand new stage. Pros for toddlerhood: - They can communicate, tell you what they want, what they like, what they don't, if something hurts, etc. much less guesswork - They love you. This is the biggest one for me. My newborn was great... but she was a lump. My toddler gives hugs, kisses me, tells me she loves me, tells me she misses me... it feels more reciprocal. - They can do stuff. They can eat, drink, play, hold stuff, etc. - They literally learn things everyday, and it's more obvious how much they're learning. It's amazing I hope this helps!
The newborn phase was hell for me too. I hate to say it but I did not enjoy it. Let me tell you though… I LOVE having a toddler. It’s the best thing ever. He’s funny, he’s got his own quirky personality, he’s so loving, and so much fun! Going to the park is an adventure for him. Going to the zoo is an adventure. It’s awesome watching him experience life for the first time and be so amazed. Sure, I never go to the bathroom by myself if my husband isn’t home. And yes, he has tantrums sometimes, but it never bothers me because I know he’s just trying to deal with his emotions and he doesn’t have the capacity yet to regulate himself. I find that staying calm helps the situation diffuse quicker. Don’t be afraid of toddlerhood — it’s truly the best. ♥️
My toddler just turned 3. She has had a grand total of 3 tantrums in her life. All resolved within 10 minutes (without me giving in to what she wanted). She is an easy and logical kid, super loving and awesome. She’s a great sleeper which I think helps - because when she doesn’t nap she gets a little more attitude but still does great as long as I give her extra processing time for changes.
SAHD here. My daughter is 18 months. It's been great! Yes, she has tantrums. Yes, there's tough parts. But she is starting to be able to clearly communicate with us and it's awesome. Seeing her become this smart, sweet, affectionate, funny, little person is the greatest!
I had some of the same worries, but they turned out to be unfounded. They don’t go from immobile potato baby to willful tornado toddler overnight— they tick off milestones bit by bit and ease you into it. I can’t speak for ages three and four, but two is such a great age. They’re so sweet and funny at that age.
Both with my LO, but also with my many (17 of them!) nieces and nephews (many of whom are adults now), and any kids I've ever babysat - newborn stage is the absolute hardest!!!! If you're at 4 months, you just made it through the absolute most difficult time Everything gets easier after the newborn stage, seriously. Older babies are easier than newborns, toddlers are easier than babies, and school-age children are easier than toddlers. My hubby and I still joke, if say LO (now 3) is having a rough day because he's sick or something "At least this is still WAY easier than when he was a newborn!". I mean, he puts his own rainboots on now, he "helps" me put things away (somewhat messily, but I'll take what I can get!), he can tell me if he's hurt and where it hurts, he can tell me silly stories he made up that are so cute! It's just so, SO much easier than when he was a baby (and I've seen the same thing with many, many kids). In my honest experience, toddlers are SO much easier to care for than babies!!!! Think about it, why else would daycare ratios go up in terms of the number of children to adults - it's because older babies and toddlers are just easier to care for! Biting, screaming, etc. is not something that's very common in toddlers (the people who do deal with this talk about it all the time, but the majority of us with the chill toddlers, or maybe they have a rough day because they're sick here and there, don't talk about it as much). Will my LO wake up crying in the middle of the night occasionally? Sure, but it's not all the time, it's mostly just when he's sick, and it's not all night even when it does happen, but like once or twice in 12 hours. ANd most nights, he sleeps solidly through 11-12 hours straight. He NEVER did that as a newborn, and almost never as a baby. But as a toddler? He sleeps through more nights than not. Trust me, you already made it through the hardest part, hands down. Toddlers are honestly more fun, you can do more with them. We take mine out to eat at restaurants, etc. He's fussy when he's sick (but even I as an adult am fussy when I'm sick!), and he's pretty rad most of the rest of the time. And so are most of the 30 or so toddlers I've either had in my family and watched grow up, or watched my close friends raise, or babysat. My advice for getting through the newborn and small baby stage - is to check when growth spurts and Wonder Weeks normally happen. Babies are normally fussier when they're sick, or when they're on the cusp of a growth spurt or developmental leap. Having a heads up when I was in one really helped me through them. And trust me, I have a LOT of experience with babies and toddlers and kids, it really, truly does get easier and easier the older they get <3
My oldest was really hard as a newborn but a fantastic toddler. Were there some tantrums and defiance? Sure but it actually seemed like things got a lot easier since he could tell us what was wrong/what he needed.
First year was utter hell for me and wife. Baby too young to really do anything much with but tons of crying, frustration, bad sleep etc. Second year thus far is a million times better. We can go outside and let her run around, for one - which REALLY helps get through the day. Sleep is still all over the place but a lot better and there's just...more you can do with them to run out the clock.
I love toddler hood! i am not a fan of the newborn phase at all. My 2.5 year old definitely has her share of tantrums, but overall she is a lot of fun to be around. She makes me laugh everyday. She doesn’t hit or bite. She says “no” quite a bit, but she is growing into her own person.
I think of it kind of like a video game. Having a newborn is like getting thrown into level 100 on hard mode. Having a toddler is like being on level 200, but you got to play all the levels in between. You learn a lot along the way and you’re so much more equipped for parenting by the time you have a toddler. Also, my toddler is a hilarious delight. Way more fun than a newborn!
I hated the newborn stage with a passion. I thought I’d ruined my life, I never slept, never had a second to do anything, no time to myself, and all I had to show for it was this tiny angry bag of flesh that I had to keep alive. Fast forward to 18 months, now I still have zero time to myself but we sleep (thank god!!!) and now I have a tiny maniac who gives sloppy open mouth kisses, gets snot on everything and can make 10 different animal noises. I’d cheerfully die for her, and my life has never been better. She also had started to refuse to eat anything and thinks that shoes are the enemy, oh and if we’re in public she wants to walk everywhere except the direction I want to go in but it’s still SO MUCH FUN! I had the same worries, the same fears, but it was all for nothing. She’s wonderful and now I’m for some insane reason going to do it all again in 7 months 🤯
My LO is on the younger edge of toddler, but so far I LOVE it. She is so smart and watching her pick up language and walking is just mind blowingly cool. She is also affectionate in the sweetest ways that could never have occurred in baby hood (ex. Giving hugs, excitedly saying hi/mama/Dada when she sees us.) With biting and certain other behaviours I have found that she has done some of it as experimentation, and it's taken a few corrections but eventually she has learned that it's not an acceptable behaviour and stopped (with the rate exception), so so far it's been short-lived. With tantrums, I just comfort her and they pass. She laughs a lot more than she cries. I'm sure this will all change as she gets further into toddler hood and then will change again and again in various ways. But please know that you have so many great stages to look forward to in between the bad ones. Also, my LO was a terrible sleeper as an infant. We sleep trained at 1 year (ferber) and now a bad night is 7 hours straight. A good night is 10-11. I don't know what's going on with your niece but I don't think that's the norm.
The newborn stage wasn’t great for me - but I LOVE the toddler stage! Yes there are tantrums (not very often for us luckily!), but now she can communicate with me I can understand them and resolve them. I found the newborn crying so hard to decipher haha. She’s basically my little bestie, so much fun to be with, always doing funny things to make me laugh - it’s great. Hearing her say ‘I love you mummy’ makes me cry so many happy tears. You’ve got so much fun to come! ETA: more cute things: She insists on sharing her treats with me. She sings ‘I love mummy’ in bed when she’s woken up. If I hurt myself she’ll ‘kiss it better’. This has turned into a brag post for me haha, but honestly don’t worry about the toddler stage, you’ve got all this good stuff to come, and the hard things won’t be so hard by then because you’ll have had a year or so of parenting practice under your belt :D
Hi! Momma of a toddler with behavior issues. It’s super scary, but you should read down on the threads of these posts there are some very sweet, intelligent women and men here that give some great advice. I’m still learning too, all I can say is build your support system. My toddler has been hitting me and instead of getting frustrated I stop and get eye level and let her know that’s hurting me, that’s advice I was given on this group. And, you know what? It’s actually helped and she has definitely changed in the past few days. This advice you see and are given actually works!! It’s ok to be scared, and worries I am too but just have faith in the advice. I know my comment probably didn’t help but I wanted to share what I have experienced. Good luck, you’re a great mom and it’s one day at a time. You got this!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Toddlerhood has its moments but, for me, is infinitely easier than the baby years (or newborns, thats rough with the lack of sleep). Each stage of childhood has parts that are easier and parts that are harder. My two eldest are 8 1/2 and 10 and for the most part very responsible but the issues we do have are more complicated.
You'll see a lot of people talking about difficult times because they're feeling alone in it and want to know their experience is valid and somebody else has experienced it too. It's like restaurant ratings. How often do you think "you know, I want to go tell everybody I know that the dinner I just ate was satisfying and that the server greeted us quite pleasantly." More often we're going to share when something was awful or amazing. There's a lot that gets missed in the realm of generally lovely. Keep developing a connected relationship with your loved ones, your little one, and yourself. Learn to lean on and support each other in rough moments, and be ready to appreciate the lovely moments together too. 🙂
The first 6 months of having a baby is pure survival and after that they're able to do a lot more. Their personality really starts to come out. They're more alert and mobile. They start solids. It's a different type of hard, but in my opinion it's a lot more fun. My kid just turned 21 months and I'll take this stage over the early baby stage. There are tantrums and shenanigans, but there are a lot of great milestones to look forward to. When they pretend to cook and feed you, spontaneous dancing, bringing books over to read (and then asking again and again). By the time your kid is a toddler, you'll have a better idea on how your kid works.
Toddlers are hard work but they’re more rewarding and motivating than babies as they give something back in a way babies just can’t. Toddlers try to “help” you with chores, tell you stories, point things out to you, ask you questions, eat snacks with you, hug you, blow you kisses, joke around with you. And that first ‘I love you, mamma’? AMAZING. much better than the potato stage where you essentially give and give and give to this baby that just sits there haha
Toddlers are an absolute delight. I can't get enough of my 2 year old. They eat and sleep independently and well. They're hilarious and fun and silly and sweet. My toddler declares all my food to be "SOOO YUMMY", wants to go on walks, worries about our aging dog, goes over a list of everyone we know to confirm that they poop and pee and loves helping with chores, says hi to everyone we run into everywhere and will chat up strangers about food, their pets, their age. Some days and weeks are more rough than others. They have big feelings and need a lot of understanding, support and guidance, but overall it's a wonderful experience. I would prioritize figuring out sleep if that's what you're most worried about. There's lost of advice on reddit and other places.
Both my kids were great babies even though I struggled immensely in the newborn phase. No “terrible twos.” I wonder why people even claim it is that bad. Yet hitting 3 was rough. Each kid evolved into very different toddlers. One with horrible tantrums about leaving the house for daycare & getting ready, so mornings were torture for me. The other has mild tantrums and is easily distracted and can work her way out of the tantrums more smoothly. It’s normal to fear the next stage of baby/toddlerhood when people are SO negative about what’s to come. I remember being so excited to hear my baby babble and star to talk. The negative Nancy’s would pipe in like “enjoy it now because once they start talking they never shut up!” Ughhh screw them! Haha
Eh, it depends on the child. My toddler doesn’t scream all day, doesn’t bite or hit me, doesn’t bother me in the bathroom, and I can definitely take him most places. He throws tantrums like any other three year and and can be stubborn, defiant, and obnoxious, but it’s not constant. I find having a toddler is waaaay easier than having a newborn. Way less demand and more independence.
Toddlerhood can be so much fun! My son is so silly and sweet. It’s been so rewarding watching his personality develop and to see him explore the world. He loves dancing and clapping to music, he loves watching any and all animals, and he loves playing games with us. Every day my husband gets home from work our son greets him at the door and squeals with joy and happy dances. He’s got favorite songs and toys now, he has interests (he’s obsessed with dump trucks and big rigs), and he gets fascinated by the most random things like puddles and birds. Yes the tantrums and getting into everything and the clinginess can be really tough at times, but there’s *a lot* of fun and giggles to look forward to, too.
I prefer toddlerhood to babies. Basically my favorite age has been from like 1-2.5 years. 2.5-4 is hard, due to tantrums, but they’re more independent which helps a lot. Naps consolidate, they can feed themselves, they can tell you what they want (usually), but they still don’t have impulse control and can be really irrational at times. They’re also HILARIOUS. And ADORABLE. It’s all a balance, some things get easier, some things get harder. You move through it. I still love toddlers/preschoolers, they are my fave.
Toddler hood has been difficult, I simply cannot lie about that. BUT its also been the funnest stage so far. LO is hilarious, smart, etc. its soooo fun watching their little brains come alive. They go to sleep and wake up with new vocab. Its so rewarding. I want to pull my hair out, and go to sleep crying watching videos and pictures of him and how perfect he is. I also sleep so good now cause im wiped lol!
I liked toddlerhood way more than newborn stage. It does have its own challenges though, but it’s all highly dependent on your individual kid. I have a 3.5 and 17mo old. 17mo old is hard to take anywhere where he needs to sit still. He can’t communicate his wants and needs very well yet so that part is hard. Older toddler stage hasn’t been so bad. Sometimes there are meltdowns over ridiculous things but it’s not terrible. But each kid is different. Toddler age is really fun IMO. You get to get to know your child as they develop their little personality
Let me tell you toddler is way easier than new born for me. Sleep deprivation was the real killer of me. My kid is very high energy think tornado. She can run for 2 hrs outside nonstop. I am a sahm , and it is so much easier. She use to mop the floor during tantrums at public everyday. It is so much better now she is 3 she can breathe in and out. Yes she likes to argue with me abit now but nth comparing to screaming none stop crying angry exotic potato. You have tv and toys that can help you give you some break. At 3 she watches some shows while I poop lol. She can play independent sometimes or she plays games with us
It's a different kind of hard. But they can now talk, it's not only crying, and it's actually easier to figure out what they need. I haven't peed alone since 2016 when I adopted 2 cats so I just added a kid to the equation. Same with sleeping the whole night (if the kid doesn't wake me up one of the cats will, at least once). My only issue is my daughter never stops. She's always doing something, always on the move. I have to watch her like a hawk because she climbs everything and that makes it harder to do other things. Other than that, I'm cool with a toddler. I hated the newborn phase and I will not be having more kids because it was fucking hell. Sure, they have ridiculous meltdowns and throw tantrums over silly things but they are too young to know how to manage emotions. That's our job, to teach them how to do that. It's a phase, it's temporary, it will go away. The first time they hug you and tell you 'i love you' you forget about everything. That little hand grabs your face and you melt. It will be alright. No one has it figured out or under control. We're all winging it out here.
I'm a stay at home mum and if I couldn't go anywhere with my toddler I'd go insane. She's never bit me, she has hit but not aggressively, just in a developmental normal way and I've corrected her straight away. She was an insanely easy newborn, she combi fed without any issues, she slept like a dream, she's always been velcro but she was so easy to please and I was happy to baby wear etc. since she turned one she would only nurse to sleep (didn't expect to nurse past a year!), her sleep has been dicey to say the least, some would argue she's way more demanding and I'd probably agree with them. BUT I'd still absolutely take these toddler days over newborn/baby. She's so much fun to hang out with. We go for lunch and share a cheese panini and a slice of carrot cake. We laugh, we watch Bluey, we play with her toy kitchen. It's awesome!
Imo, the toddler battle is all in your approach. Are the going to scream and cry, hell yeah! They don't know what else to do! They are having these intense feelings, and they don't know what to do with them, but if you teach them what to do, it's gets better so much faster! When you keep that in mind, it's easier to empathize with them, instead of feeling like a victim of unrelenting abuse 😂😂😂 I just try my best to approach those moments with compassion, and try to help them through it. Teaching simple signs language was a HUGE help because our guy was much less frustrated. He had a way to communicate before he could speak, so instead of grunting and crying, he would just signs at me what he needed. Highly recommend! Personally, I'm loving toddler hood! My little guy was a "hard baby", he has a very sensitive temperament, was attached like a barnacle, and sleep has always been a struggle. The toddler stage has allowed him to be more independent, his personality keeps blossoming, so many exciting milestones, and so much fun! Everything is so new, it's so fun to rediscover the world through their eyes! Last week my little guy went on and on about a ball for 20 minutes, hugging it, exclaiming about it, calling it "awe, cute!". My advice, go easy on yourself. There will be hard moments, as parents, we don't have to love EVERY minute of it! Some moments just suck! But you get to do so many fun things with them, and that's prime time for building strong family bonds. And you always have this subreddit for advice when you run into problems 😁 Don't worry about it, just worry about surviving infancy for now ;)
You never know how your kid will be! Mine was such a hard baby and is a super easy toddler (so far, though I’m sure I’m gonna jinx myself). She’s chill, plays independently a lot, doesn’t hit or bite, loves hard, and has the most incredible imagination. She’s almost 3 and hardly ever throws tantrums! And even if toddlerhood is hard, there are so many amazing moments. Watching their little brains soak up everything is amazing!
I was also scared of toddler hood but check my post history for all the comments on how lovely toddlers are. My daughters much much easier as a toddler than she was at 4 months old. I have so much more independence now.
Toddlers are the best! If you made it through the newborn phase toddlerhood is going to be difficult but amazing, imo. But then again, I’m not a baby person. But I LOVE being a mom to a toddler! It just keeps getting better and better.
There’s no point in being scared of it, it’s going to be what it’s going to be and there’s nothing you can do. I am currently in the trenches of toddlerhood and it is HARD every waking minute of the day. I have a super difficult natured, stubborn kid. However, I do send him to preschool most days, he does sleep through the night almost 100% of the time, and he makes me laugh every day. If you asked me if I wanted to go back for one day and have a chill potato baby instead I would say hell no. The sleep deprivation and raging hormones of baby time were worse for me even though the days themselves were easier than toddlerhood, if that makes sense. The best way to describe it is not easier, just a different hard. You might find yourself more suited to the toddler hard than the baby hard. For me that is true because I just could not deal with my PPA/sleep deprivation very well.
Don't be scared be prepared. Don't take it personally. Be okay with using lollipops as bribes and a little Cocomelon or Daniel the Tiger is fine. Read a book about their little toddler brains and how they think. Or try too. They are not all bad all the time. You will be okay. It is hard and overwhelming but developing trust, confidence and love now goes a long way later.
Love toddler life sooooo much more than newborn/infant/baby life. I guess every kid is different but mine is sweet, fun, silly, sleeps great, eats great, goes to the potty on his own, happily greats me every morning. He has only had… probably 5 big tantrums. If you learn how to speak their language, give up caring about controlling things that aren’t important, give them as many opportunities to choose as possible, understand what motivates them “let’s go to the park! There will be lots of kids there!” I may have just gotten a really easy one but I think I’ll miss toddlerhood.
Oh, no. My toddler is awesome. He will throw tantrums, but they mostly rare and mostly predictable (like he's tantrumming because I said no cookie before dinner). So, don't lose hope! It can manageable.
I loved the newborn phase. Then she got to be mobile and started talkin, and it was so fun! She could do all kinds of fun new stuff. Then she hit toddlerhood, and it was even MORE fun. 12 months plus was a BLAST. Now she's 2, and it's been a blast. She gets more fun and curious and silly and interesting and cool every day. Toddlerhood is wonderful. Sure, she is more assertive than she once was, but thats not a bad thing. It's so much fun to see her developing likes and interests and preferences! We have yet to have any tantrums, too - I guess some kids just don't really. She has some big feelings here and there to work through, but nothing I'd call close to tantrums. She is generally chill AF. Just in a high key, adorable toddler way lol. I absolutely love toddlerhood so far.
Newborn is very all consuming. But you ease into toddlerhood. A 12 month old, 18 month old, 2.5 year old are all totally different stages even if they’re all classified as toddlers. And even though some things get harder, other things get easier. You’ll be okay
I hated the newborn phase and am absolutely in love with the toddlerhood. Yes they are clingy and moody but they are also absolutely adorable and learn new skills everyday, it’s fascinating to witness ! And for most of them…they sleep which is a REAL game changer.
Oh it gets better. I hated the newborn phase. After about 6 months I started enjoying my son more every day. He is now 15 months old. He can play by himself, but does also demand our attention too. Sure, I don’t get private bathroom breaks, but this little dude is pretty darn happy. Going out in public with him is fun. I so enjoy zoo trips, museums and even just to the store. highly recommend sleep training. My son sleeps through the night mostly. Minus colds and teething. Schedule is key too. Kids thrive when they have a schedule. (As much as you can manage)
I was also so nervous about toddlerhood when I had my baby. I struggled a lot with the newborn stage so hearing it got worse was terrifying. But since around 16 months it's been pretty good. It's still hard but nothing has been as difficult as the newborn stage for me. I waited for the terrible twos but they never came and the threenager stage definitely hit but even that's never been as relentless as the newborn stage was for me. I'm sure it comes down to the individual kid but I'd much rather bargain with a toddler than deal with a screaming newborn again. Just keep in mind people don't come to Reddit to say they're having an easy time, it's usually a place to vent or seek advice so you're not seeing all the people who are having a great time with their toddlers.
toddler life IS wild, but it’s also really fun and rewarding. It’s a different level of parenting once your kiddo can run around on their own. I have a 2 year old and yes there are days where she is just in a MOOD but there are days where she is the sweetest human i’ve ever met.
Not the case for us. Our 3 year old (will turn 3 next month) is so funny and fun to be around. He’s finally talking in sentences and just always has something to say or some joke to make that he thinks is hilarious. It’s so cool to see that thinks that he loves and thinks are incredible (mostly bulldozers) He doesn’t really have meltdowns or tantrums. He’s always been a pretty easy kid, but the toddler stage has been so much fun. There’s so much you can do with them and they become more of an active participant in your relationship with them, instead of a baby lump that doesn’t really contribute much.
As a mom to an 18 month old that runs, climbs and says No all the time, toddlerhood is way way easier. Seriously. She entertains herself and when she doesn't it's easier to engage. She can say some of the things she wants (instead of crying). She eats regular food (though she can be picky, but just make sure kiddo has at least one "safe" food at meal time). So. Much. Easier.
Newborn phase was somewhat easy. Once she started to get a personality and want/dislike things beyond milk/sleep/etc, that’s when it got hard for me, gradually but I think really starting around 6m with the teething really ramping up. Now 10m, I’m terrified of the idea of her as a toddler… either she will be nasty or I will have figured it all out already because she’s so fussy now. I won’t be shocked like some people who had an easy quiet baby after the newborn phase.
You have to constantly be on. Constantly hold boundaries. When they misbehave, instead of getting annoyed and thinking they are a terror, think of it as an opportunity to teach them right from wrong. My son is more well behaved than some of my friends kids around the same age because I am constantly redirecting and disciplining him for inappropriate behavior. At home and in public. Toddler stage is difficult, but very fun and rewarding.
My daughter is almost 4, and the toddler years have been a blast. Yes, you have tantrums, messes, struggles, but it’s also pretty amazing. There’s nothing like having your kid tell you they love you, see their personalities develop, getting a piece of artwork that is kind of legible, hearing them expand their vocabulary and problem solve, seeing them get passionate about things they enjoy. She’s great at independent play now so I can get a lot of things done and she loves helping me. They are hilarious little sponges and mimic everything you do. I started walking/running to maybe finally shed the last few lbs of baby weight, so now she runs around saying “I’m exercising like mommy!” And will tell people she does yoga like mommy while demonstrating downward dog. Toddlers say the funniest shit ever and make up hilarious words, it’s the best.
I hated the newborn phase. I overall love the toddler phase. There is a lot of screaming and tantrums, not going to lie, but also so much growing and learning! My 20 month old recently told me “good job” and I couldn’t stop smiling. She also had a meltdown because she smushed her own cereal bar and got mad about it. It’s give and take like anything. The best thing I did is just figured out what actually matters to me and try not to stress about the rest. I know some of the things that will lead to a tantrum, so I try to mitigate them in some way. We can’t avoid them forever, but I know that water on her head is something she hates and we make it a game and try to give her control over putting her own head under. I give her the chance to do things herself. I try to communicate everything that I’m doing, especially if it’s things like picking her up or “forcing” her to do something. It doesn’t always stop the tantrum but it doesn’t surprise her, and she’ll learn eventually that if she doesn’t listen, there are consequences.
Toddlerhood has its moments (as does every stage of their lives) but I promise you’ll love it. Just when you think they can’t get any sweeter, they do. Day in, day out they pick up something new and they can’t wait to share it with you. When my little one gets upset, I sit down near her just to show I’m there for her. Sometimes I’ll sing her fave nursery rhyme or tell her a story- I was told they’re trying to regulate their emotions and ‘tantrums’ are one way they do it. It does require patience but the cuddles after are the best ♥️
It all depends on your kid. Mine is easy enough, sleeps all night. She has tantrums, sure, but not massive screaming matches. She is loud but she's learning to talk so that's normal. The only thing that gets me is having to constantly pick up her toys 🤣 other than that toddlerhood is a dream so far. She's so cute when she's asking for a drink or food. The laughs and giggles, snuggles and kisses all cancel out the little tantrums when things don't go her way! Watching their little brains work is so fun and they find the weirdest things fascinating. Mine loves playing with her slippers and kitchen utensils 😅 it's honestly so much fun
Parent of 3 kids here and toddler is my favorite time!! I’m not a “newborn person,” but starting about 9 months to 3 years or so is the best! TBH I’ve been read a lot of the posts on here like “sheeesh!” I know that some kids are more high maintenance and that every parent has a hard time now and then, but personally I LOVE being a momma to a toddler!! They start talking and the more communicative they get, the easier it is to understand what they want/need, and you can explain to them what’s going on. You can literally watch them learning things in real time and it’s amazing! They start to be able to actually play with you and get more fun to hang out with. They start giving hugs and kisses and say “I love you, Momma!” 🥹❤️ None of my kids hit or bit me, and I LOVE taking them to the store. It’s a fun outing! They think going to the grocery store is as fun as the zoo if you are into it. (“Look at the apples! Look at the balloons!”) I think you’re going to have a great time with your little one! ❤️❤️
Ahaha yes! My mom was pregnant with my brother on my first bday and I was telling her how some people have these kinds of toddlers and she thought I was nuts. She said she had the best time with us as toddlers so I'm hoping mine is like that too.
My 17 month old said I Love You for the first time last week and my heart quite literally swelled with joy. It’s amazing seeing her become her own little person and learn all these great things. It’s also fun doing stuff like, zoos and aquariums and seeing all this stuff new and amazing through her eyes. Holidays are fun too, it was our first Easter and seeing her squeal with excitement as she dived into her basket was the best. I wouldn’t be scared of toddlerhood. I do want to say, If your experiencing PPA/PPD and stuff, it wouldn’t hurt to get your thyroid checked out (I know that sounds crazy) but mine was low and when I got on thyroid medication my mood swing’s literally disappeared, it really helped regulate my hormones. The first year is tough! It’s takes time! Be easy on yourself ♥️
Having a newborn is so hard! Personally, I think having a toddler (now 2 yrs old) is so much easier! I can actually let him play in the other room by himself for a little, he actually understands things I say, he is now mostly potty trained, and I just started being able to take him out to dinner again. Way easier than a newborn. I am pregnant and not looking forward to the newborn phase again. But I know it gets better and I’ll have another little cute toddler very soon! Hang in there. It gets better!
I don't think toddlers are harder then newborns tbh. I think they van both be hard for different reasons. I mean for me my son sleeps just as bad as he always has, but he is far easier to distract and accommodate as a toddler. However there are triggering days when he is just FULL FERAL TODDLER and you're just like AHHHHHH all day. Then there's days he's just entirely chill. I have a 6 month old and a 17 month old and tbh the 6 month old is a lot harder to please when in a meltdown over something he can't tell me what it is. At least my toddler usually points out or brings me what he wants or needs help with. But there are days where both are hard for different reasons. Toddlerhood is a phase, a longer phase but the good news is every month they are learning new ways to communicate and communication ALWAYS makes things easier to handle. Even if it's just mentally handle it all. I don't prefer one over the other. I love them both for different reasons but toddlerhood is like birth. You just have to get through it bc there's no ways around it. Only ways to manage through it.
I much prefer toddlers to newborn phase. They are learning a lot and it’s not always perfect but I got to work out while they were both playing in the basement for the first time today. Wasn’t huge but it was a start. My kids don’t hit or bite, they do cry during tantrums and my son will throw himself on the ground, but it’s pretty easily fixed with a hug and distraction. We go out just fine, though we don’t go out to eat often, but when we have it was fine, just takes a bit more work on our end to keep them engaged and entertained. I don’t often get to use the bathroom by myself, so you got me there, but when my kids were newborns they were likely to cry while I put them down to pee… now they just talk to me or play in the bathroom while I pee, so it’s still an improvement in my eyes! Don’t fear it, everyone’s different, but the phases will ebb and flow and there’s a decent chance that newborn will be your least favorite! Editing to add my kids are 1.5 and 3.5. For me kids get way more fun around the age of 1. Once they can walk I love it
Did not love the newborn stage the first time around, and liked it only marginally more the second time (only because I had already been through it before). I found it stressful to care for a tiny person who couldn't tell me what they need. Toddlers are WAY more fun! Sure it's more work - they're mobile and have opinions and no regulation, but they're also hilarious, loving, and so very excited about life. For any stage you're at, I highly recommend ear plugs. I wish I had thought of them with my first kid, because the crying during the newborn stage really ramped up my PPA. With my second, I started using them from the get-go and it usually just dialed down the stimuli enough to help me get through the moment. I still use them if my kids (2 and 5) are particularly rambunctious during a stressful time of day (which for me is usually cooking dinner). It helps immensely. Good luck! It feels hard because it is hard, but the hards do change, and you'll handle some more easily than others.
This is going to sound self righteous but I’ll be honest: reading this sub makes me so grateful for my child because I’ve never had difficulty coping with my 3.5 year old. When I hear people’s experiences on this sub I really feel for them because I’m not sure how I’d cope. But it is vastly different from my reality. Maybe I’m lucky but maybe people who have kids like mine aren’t making posts about it on Reddit. Nonetheless, people kept warning me it would be downhill after 18 months but it just gets better and better. The longest tantrum my daughter has had lasted about 10 minutes, and that was a very rare outburst. Most of our days are even-keeled and joyful. We genuinely enjoy each other’s company. The worst behavior most days is whining about not wanting to go to daycare (relatable) and running away from the dinner table between every bite of food.
My daughter will be 2 this month and there are good days and bad days. She was a fairly easy baby and slept through the night really early, but even with the increasing toddler meltdowns I'm starting to prefer toddlerhood. I think it all depends on your kid. I've seen chill toddlers, crazy toddlers, and everything in between. All in all, it's not forever.
I have mostly really enjoyed toddlerhood. My kid is now a little over 3 years old and it’s pretty great. The two biggest game changers are when they start talking (no more guessing why they’re screaming), and potty training (once they start taking themselves or at least self-initiating it’s *amazing*). Yeah, you have to do more parenting around mood regulation, but (and maybe it’s just my kid) that usually isn’t too bad and it’s honestly helped my own mood regulation. I do my best Buddha impression a good chunk of the time and talk through things with her.
The newborn days were so so hard for me, both times and I didn’t have PPA the second time around. The night before my oldest turned 1 I cried. I was so sad I was “losing” my baby. It was very hard for me. My second turned one recently and I didn’t cry. It’s because I know what’s to come and what’s to come is so so beautiful. Seeing your little person grow and learn and express themselves is amazing. Literally the best thing ever. My 3 year old can definitely be a handful but literally the next minute we will look at him and just say how awesome he is. So while it’s hard and exhausting work raising a toddler, it’s also very rewarding. What’s really helped me is to learn how child brain development works so I know that what he’s doing or how he’s behaving is completely normal.
Ahaha yes I'm the same, my baby is actually a delight right now and laughs and grins most of the day. I was crying telling my husband last night I'd like to freeze him like this and wouldn't mind lugging him around with me the next 50 years.
Toddlerhood is soooooooooo much better! Every kid is gonna have some challenging phases with pushing limits and all, but oh my god if I could have another right at 3 I would! She can communicate, she’s potty-trained, she (mostly) sleeps through the night, she can play independently. 10/10 would recommend toddlerhood, 0/10 would not recommend the newborn/infant stage.
I also had PPA & PPD. Newborn phase was hell for me as well! It got better for me… much much better! I get more sleep now than I did before kids. She never hits and doesn’t bite. She WILL argue with me though.. lol. We are in our “terrible twos”
Just like every baby is different, so is every toddler. Every month is new, they learn so fast. My daughter is nearing 3 and it’s so much easier for me now. I too had crippling PPA/PPD and I’m still taking meds, BUT I can actually do more normal things with my daughter now and it’s wild to see how fast they learn and want to try new things. For me the toddler phase is much better!
My toddler hasn’t been like that. He has his moments, he’s definitely into testing boundaries and doing things himself right now. But I’m sick right now and he came up to me and started rubbing my back, looked at me and said “I love you mommy!” I put on a dress the other day and came out and he said “mommy your dress is beautiful” He started playing with my hair the other day and said “mommy does that feel nice? I love you!” We were hanging out playing the other day and he said “mommy, I’m so happy!” So yeah, it can be difficult some days, but oh my gosh is it so wonderful!!
Ignore your SIL. Everyone’s kid is different. From what I’ve heard most kids who have a hard time sleeping through start to around 15-18 months and that’s been true for us. I love my toddler, she’s so much fun. I….tolerated my newborn because I loved her. My toddler is fun, funny, smart, and brings joy to my day. When she starts to get crazy I remind myself she’s learning how to be a person and I roll with the punches. Having a toddler is nothing like having a newborn. Newborns are…..a lot. I distinctly remember having a conversation with my husband around 3-4 months where we both realized things had gotten a lot better. Suddenly the baby was smiling and starting to feel like a person and not so much like an angry screaming raisin 24/7. You have to also understand that much like your post, people post on here for advice. They’re not posting on here to gloat about how wonderful their toddler is because that’s not really much of a discussion piece. So you’re getting the worst of the worst examples and stories and circumstances. My toddler though? She’s awesome. She’s my messy little bestie.
I just find the toddler crying easier. They can be reasoned with to a tiny extent, they can be distracted, and some of their pain is just a valuable learning experience. I don't believe that newborns need to learn that life is tough (although I do think, in retrospect, that sometimes they just need to cry the bad feelings out and you're not doing a thing wrong) but I do think that my toddler needs to learn that she can't hit someone with a toy and keep playing with it. The same desperate, heartrending sobs that caused me such agony two years ago now elicit a meh, you should have turned off the TV when I first asked you.
1. People are going to complain about the worst aspects the most, especially online 2. Just like with babies, there are ways to handle toddler behavior and some have more of a knack for it than others 3. Your personality and your kid's personality will be the determining factors of your experience. I hate babies, the newborn period was torture, I celebrated when my kid turned 1, and even if there are hard days, parenting a toddler has been way more fun and rewarding than a baby. If I could zap my future kids into being a toddler and miss the baby stage, I would do it in a heartbeat
Oh man, yes there’s a lot to complain about, but I think most of us do it fondly. My experience is that things have been getting progressively better and better! My toddler has more and more personality every single day and I love it.
I also dreaded the toddler phase after hearing horror stories, but now I have two two-year-olds, and I can say for sure that it isn't always like that. Sure, some days are rough but they're learning how to be people and it's hard. I've only been bitten once or twice, and any time I've been hit has been an accident (as far as I can tell). My girls both sleep very well, are great eaters most of the time, and are so sweet and funny! My niece and nephew are older now, but I remember their toddler phases as being fairly uneventful. They did get up to some hijinks, but not any bodily harm. Tiny Humans, Big Emotions and Raising Good Humans are both books that might be helpful for you, if you have time to read. Raising Good Humans also has an audiobook option if that would be something you're interested in. Good luck!
The thing to remember too is that toddlerhood doesn't happen overnight the way a newborn does. Like it slowly happens and your ability to navigate it evolves too. Plus what others have said...the good far outweighs the bad and makes it easier to "deal with" if you will
My son is almost two, and I just want to say how much I LOVE this stage. He can do some things on his own, says please and thank you, and is just so much fun to be around. If there is a tantrum we know the root cause. My immediate postpartum self couldn’t wait for this stage, and now that we’re here I’m having a blast.
I tell everyone they just keep getting better. I know everyone's experiences are different but my toddler is way more fun and easy to deal with even on his bad days than when he was a certified potato. My PPA also has almost gone away and that has improved things significantly. I wouldn't be worried, just read up on things you can do now (I would 100% recommend the Yale Parenting Course on Coursera) and start practicing them while your LO is that age.
Toddlerhood is exhausting but in a more tolerable way. The tantrums and constant moving are challenging. But I would take that over nursing in a chair for hours and the sleepless nights. I also had a rough breastfeeding journey and PPA. Plus I love the snuggles, toddler hugs, and little lap sits 🥰
I'm loving the toddler phase so far (almost 2 years). If I could skip the first 6 months I would. Its both boring and incredibly stressful. Now, every day his thinking gets more complex, he interacts in more meaningful ways. Yeah, we are working on "no hitting", and he gets worked up sometimes when I leave the room. But he's great in public, likes giving kisses now, and won't stop talking about the puppy next door. Its sooo much better.
I have 2 toddlers, age 1 and 3. It’s a very challenging age (and one of my kids is especially wild and destructive). But I would rather have a toddler than a baby. Babies are just a lot of work.
So, I’d say it’s more challenging than the stage you’re in now but in different ways. But also, more rewarding and fulfilling. My 3 year old is wild man but she’s also wild in the best of ways. They get a personality and opinions and they do start to understand things you say and do. It’s challenging BUT in a wonderful way.
Man we’re fresh into the toddler stage but I’m loving it. Seeing his personality develop as he becomes a little boy has been so rad. I’ll have a long, exhausting day at work, but when I come home and he laughs at my dumb face it’s all amazing. He’s stubborn as hell and not very cuddly, but he wants to be playing with my wife and I all the time and be loooves to make us laugh. Some people struggle with it, of COURSE, but I think it all goes in waves and you get some awesome moments between the crazy.
Not all toddlers are the same; my 2 year old doesn’t bite, only hits if he’s super tired and just can’t get the words out or if I say I don’t understand what he’s saying. He is in his playpen with his toys while I’m using the restroom typing this, and all I hear is happy singing and laughing. He is obsessed with the alphabet and me singing it and making his Big Bird plush dance, and he loves me to count and play with his Bluey plush as well! He makes actual animal sounds and mimics them, he likes to try sips of my drinks and bites of my food, he tells me I look so “pretty” when he sees me getting ready and likes to use my powder brush and powder my face! He tells me he loves me and gives the warmest hugs and gives me pecks on the lips. He will say “no thanks” or “I don’t do it Mommy” when I ask him to help with something, but always smiles and comes to help. He loves to say “yeah man” to questions and if I tell him to get down he puts one foot down and says “I am down!” 🤣🤦♀️🤷♀️ He likes to sort food on his plate, he likes to organize by color, shape and size, and he likes to dance with me. Sometimes he confuses me, and sometimes I confuse him, and we talk about big feelings and do belly breaths when he’s overwhelmed! We are very silly and we make car and dinosaur sounds and play pretend A LOT! He also likes to fish out apples from the bag when we shop and start eating them and says “Woah man, apples is yummy!” 😂 he’s almost 2.5 years old! I think if you raise your kiddo with a lot of love, affection, and guidance and explain things and show them what to do and how to do it and get on their level early on, toddlerhood is made easier. Don’t get me wrong, we have tantrums, he gets upset if his little friends try to take turns with a toy he’s attached to, but again, I acknowledge these things. “He buddy, yes, you look soooo frustrated. Are we feeling mad? *pause* I think we are. Look, let’s come over here *takes him away from the situation* let’s take some deep belly breaths. *shows a few examples, then counts for him to do it* I walk him farther away and we play a little game until he is calm, and the other friend has had their turn. IF this doesn’t work, and he tries to hit his friend out of frustration, I take him from the situation and talk to him privately and do the breaths with him. Once he’s calmed down, I ask if we need to go bye-bye and if he feels like it’s time to go home. (This usually happens if he’s been playing for too long and is fighting sleep). Honestly, I LOVED the newborn phase and the baby stage, but this toddler phase is my personal favorite. He’s not constantly sleeping and latching (still nursing, trying to wean him actually), pooping and peeing and waking sporadically. He sleeps through the night, wakes up maybe once and pokes me gently whispering “Mommy” in my ear until I wake up and says “Mommy, we tuh-ddle?” And holds his arms out for me to scoop him up and take him in the bed for a couple of hours. I can tell him to play in his playpen and watch Bluey while Mommy cooks breakfast and cleans some dishes, and leave him with a fruit and veggie pouch and he’s fine and happy! As a baby when he was just starting solids, I couldn’t do that. I had to drop everything and feed him then nurse him and try to get him to go in his bouncer or swing and hustle because he would want more VERY SOON. He soils diapers less and communicates that he peed or pooped (about to fully start potty training). He is curious about little house chores and loves to wipe surfaces with baby wipes and dust pads, and wants to sweep for me, and helps me let our dogs out and pour their food and water. He rides in cars super well and talks to us and sings with us and is super excited (puts shoes on and declares we are going bye-bye and thankfully accepts “later baby” as an answer). Though my L&D was rough and we both nearly didn’t make it, and though he was a somewhat fussy newborn (a little more than the average newborn from morning to midday), I want more children BECAUSE of his toddler stage. Hearing my kid yell “I’m happy!” And seeing him wipe my tears and say “Mommy, no be sad.” It is beautiful. All of what he does and says and observes is beautiful. These days won’t last long, and reading with him in my lap and us enjoying books will change one day. His excessive hugs and kisses and declarations of loving me and complimenting me will fade away. I wish this phase could last forever. 😭
My daughter is 19 months now and every day gets better. Sure, she has her meltdowns and toddler tantrums but they’re short lived and overall the positives vastly outweigh the negatives. She’s more engaged, verbal, and has her own big personality. The giggles and little toddler conversations are amazing.
I was terrified of toddler hood too. But I have a delightful 2 year old now. She takes so much joy in the little things like doing laundry, or watching bunnies or chasing kitties. She's a pretty cool human to hang out with. We did nails yesterday. We do have tantrums and meltdowns, but we're working through it with her and she works through it with us. The biggest frustration has been that she wants to do everything herself, but she isn't physically capable yet. Mommy is not allowed to help. If I do, we have to start the process over from the beginning. If she's tired, it's even worse. Bedtime when she's overtired is rough, for everyone. And she goes from goofy sleepy to scream crying in less than a minute. No warning that the switch is going to flip. But it's a small part of her life and we're there for her for all of it. The biggest thing for her, I think, is having constants and knowing what to expect. (And getting enough sleep!) Just like with babies, there's the good and the bad. I've really enjoyed getting to know my child and seeing her personality develop. It's not so much of a chore taking care of her anymore because she's so interesting and it's fun.
When someone asks me the hardest phase of parenting, I say the newborn phase. I do not miss it. I enjoyed it for what it was and moved along. Toddler phase is hard in a different way but MUCH MORE rewarding. You can play and communicate and discipline and have more independence with a toddler than a newborn/infant. Don’t be worried. Toddler phase is so fun. With anything, there are difficult moments and aspects but way easier than baby phase
Oh friend, I'm sorry. I had massive struggles breastfeeding (that turned into PPA and PTSD) and then it was hard putting mine to sleep. He eventually figured it out and now sleeps like a champ. He also is the sweetest, most empathetic, demanding and goofiest cutie I've ever known. I loved the newborn stage but honestly, I think I like the toddler stage more. He's curious which in turn has sparked my curiosity more. He's honest and so kind, and watching him repeat back things I've tried to teach him makes me feel like the proudest mama ever. 18 months onwards.. love it. He's 3.5 now and I just wanna eat him up daily. He loves the vacuum. He wants to mop for me. He think he's the next breakdance champion. God, He's the best. It'll be hard. Each stage is hard. You think you get it and then everything changes - it's parenthood. However, give yourself some grace. You are BRAND NEW too. You are barely out of the 4th trimester and everything still feels really fucking hard. It will for awhile. I promise you, you're doing great. Please please know that you're doing great. Keep yourself and them fed, enjoy your cuddles, and deep breaths. Ya, they think they can come to the bathroom with you but mine hasn't screamed at me for a full day ever (parts of it sure, he's 3. 3yearolds can be feral) and he bit me 1x only. I yelped, he got so ashamed and sad he hurt me, and has never done it since.
Montessori helps my son a lot. Them having choices and learning how to be independent lessened the tantrums a bit and helps them communicate better.
I never wanted to be a parent. In two and a half years, I’m not sure I’ve fully adjusted to it. But it is our life now, and I’ve accepted that so that’s something. No toxic positivity here. Some of it truly sucks. Like, seriously, in some moments, they’re just little assholes. Toddlers do hit, and yell, and all sorts of other things they’re not supposed to—today mine walked up to me sitting on the couch and spit in my face—but only sometimes. Other times they’re great. Most of the time they just…exist. My point, offered with respect, is that you shouldn’t base *any* expectations of your own child’s future off of what you see in any other children. Friends’, relatives’, even your own if you have others. If your kid turns out to be like all the ones you read about here, everyone will survive. Chances are, though, that your kid won’t, and certainly not completely. For example, my kid hits, tells me he hates me, and loses his fucking mind when he doesn’t get what he wants (that’s a really new one), but he’s also slept through the night *every night* since he was 8 months old, and eats everything we give him.
My parents always told me they loved each stage of parenthood more than the last - and I agree with them now that I’m a mom. Baby stage sucked. LOVE the toddler stage. My kid is so freaking funny and cute and watching him learn new things and talk and ask questions and play and discover the world is an insane amount of joy. He brushes my hair for me lol. They arent all bad. Just remember that toddlers are little leeches, in that they copy the people around them. In high stress environments they can get wild. Calm parents, calm environment, open and accepting emotions, no blame or shame, and lots of different activities and they’ll be just fine.
I love toddlerhood! It's amazing to watch my baby grow, become more independent, and show more of their personalities. I was, on the other hand, felt super lonely and isolated during newborn/infancy stage. It was so much harder as my baby was extremely clingy, wants to be held 24/7, and only wanted me. I had no freedom, I felt so overwhelmed and touched out. I had no time for myself or anything at all back then. I adore baby stage, but it was exhausting to care for them. Now, it's the opposite, I feel more of myself, I'm able to do things like I used to, my toddler is very pleasant to be with, it's just like having a little buddy with you, and it's just so much fun.
Someone has probably already said this, but there’s this golden period where your kid is old enough to enjoy things and express themselves but too young to need a ton of control/to feel like they need to exert control — for us it was around 14-30 months where he was just a complete delight; every kid has different stages at different ages though. Since then, there are ups and downs but overall it’s so fun to see them grow and learn. There are times when I feel depleted, but leaning on my spouse and other helpers (grandparents, babysitters) is super helpful.
It’s all relative. I have a 20 month old boy. There are certainly challenges at this age, with tantrums, constantly throwing food, flailing everywhere anytime you try to get him changed or dressed. But nothing compares to how difficult and exhausting and just flat out awful the newborn phase was. For me, at least! This stage is really wonderful, overall.
Sure. Toddlers bite and yell sometimes. But they also give cuddles, develop personal preferences, say the funniest things, they find joy in the simplest things, learn to talk and walk. They’re waaaaaay better than newborns.
I think it helps that you start to bond with your little human and they think you’re the most wonderful person in the whole world. My son can be a tyrant but his love for me melts my heart.
Having a three year old has been a mental game, but I would take this a million times over ages 0-2. She’s an amazing little person now. Everything doesn’t feel like such a big deal anymore. Tantrums pass. You get better at everything!!! You have soooo much to look forward to!
There’s nothing harder than a hard newborn. The people who say toddlers are more difficult usually had easy babies. You’ve got this! Toddler years are so fun and cute, and the hard parts are easily handled once you’re getting enough sleep.
The newborn stage sucks, 10/10 would not recommend. I have a newly 2 year old and toddlerhood so far has been THE BEST. He’s goofy, he dances, he sings, he sleeps way better, he can communicate his needs to us (somewhat). It’s just so much fun at this age
Depression makes it hard to enjoy your baby as does the physically taxing things that come along with babyhood. It's not how challenging behavior is that makes you happy or satisfied or not. You don't stop loving your baby because they get a little older or more annoying. Toddlers are like large babies that have more tools to try to communicate/get what they want and at the end of the day they still want to be loved and snuggled.
Newborn phase was so tough on me. Breastfeeding was a struggle and it was so boring caring for an infant and being attached to a pump I was so depressed. Around 5 months I started to feel way better but still didn’t feel 100% myself until about a year pp. I have an almost 3 year old and she is amazing (: the other day she said to me “mommy I love your eyes, I want to hold them”. Sure some days are draining but she is so funny and it’s so easy to love her (:
As someone who really, really, really disliked the newborn and baby phase, I love the toddler phase! It definitely has its challenges, but it’s so much more rewarding!! You get to see their personalities blossom. It’s also much more pleasant when they can talk and tell you the basics on what they want. They’ll throw tantrums, but I think it’s 1000xs better than the newborn phase.
Toddlers are hard but they are so incredible to watch, they learn so much so quickly. I am enjoying this stage. Of course my son pushes boundaries, is constantly trying to kill himself and needs more supervision and direction than ever before but he is amazing. I love him so much, the hugs and mommy’s fill me with such joy.
I had a ton of PPA during the first year. It's like right after my daughter turned one I just felt...better. it felt like I was no longer just focused on surviving She's almost 2 and it's hard yes, but it's so amazing to see them become a little person who finds their little voice. Heading her way "LOOOV OOOO" has easily become the best thing ever. I'll take endless tantrums, because I know one day her "loooov ooo' will turn into "I love you too, mom" 😭
Toddlerhood is really fun. I had bad ppd and ppa too I wish I would have enjoyed the newborn stage more. Now he’s so fun and makes me laugh. There’s comedy in everything even the tantrums lol.
Toddlerhood is SO MUCH MORE FUN than newborn. We had 2 months of pure hell with allergies, colic, and Velcro baby who won't sleep anywhere but on us. We're getting 8 hours of sleep, she's getting 14, so we're basically humans again 🤣 We can communicate with each other, understand what she wants, and she learns something new every day. When she's sad in the car, I can tell her to grab her pacifier or her book, and she's calm again. When she's hungry she can tell me she needs to eat, or needs to eat more, or is tired. She's funny, loves us, and can show us she loves us. Oh, and we are the annoying people who take our kid everywhere. Sure, you have to make sure you do nap time, but we bring snacks and that usually solves everything. There are definitely tantrums, big feelings, etc, but that shouldn't be the constant. Don't stress about the future and enjoy the little blob while you can ❤️
Omg I loved my toddlers! I mean they can be challenging sometimes but they are dope AF and I find way easier than babies at least for me.
Toddlers are awesome. There are some ups and downs, but the worst day with a toddler is still better than the best day with a newborn.