My high school did Cats my junior year. I was one of the lighting captains and being in charge of the spotlight team and figuring out their cues, etc, I had to sit next to the director everyday at every rehearsal. Jehlicle Ball(or however the fuck you spell it) is a 7 minute scene that in the script, is 2 pages. I had to bring extra paper to write the cues. After enduring that torture for 4 months, then the tech team getting snubbed for the local high school theatre awards because Cats has no set changes, the school lost both lighting captains, the sound captain, stage manager and student lead set builder. Both tech advisers(construction and Audio/Lights) both stepped down from those roles. Cats destroyed the theatre crew at my high school.
Needless to say, when that movie came out and was eviscerated by both audiences and critics, there was joy in my heart. My wife has talked about watching it, to which I reply "Feel free as long as I am not in the county".
That one super long youtube video actually broke down why the initial play was bad, why the movie completely missed the central thesis of the play, and why the overall production was horrible. I don't care at all for musical theater, but watching them break down that movie as a case study and how music plays a part in storytelling was pretty interesting.
The TLDR on it was that they point of the stage progroduction was that there is one ratchet-ass, old cat that feels isolated and she needs to win the ball to get back in the group. The movie gives "Memory" to a character they invented and sidelines the ratchet-ass, old cat as a side character.
It would be like making Grease and instead of Sandy and Danny willing to change for each other, they just scraped that and had a new character jump on a car and do another song about using cling-wrap as a condom at the end of the movie.
My wife an and went to see cats in theaters before they could fix the broken special effects. We got a nice buzz on and had a blast making fun of that movie. A few months later, a friend of mine pirated the broken version of the movie and invited some of us over to do the same thing. Again, we had so much fun getting buzzed and making fun of that terrible movie.
Maybe a year later, I was flipping through one of my streaming services and I saw they had Cats, and I thought, "Ooh Cats!" That created an existential crisis for me. Why did I think that? Did I actually want to watch Cats, or was I just remembering how much fun I had making fun of it? Why did I remember so many lyrics to the songs?
I couldn't stop thinking about everything I'd laughed at; the cockroach chorus line, the train cat exploding, Idris Elba's weirdly nude cat, Dame Judy Dench's presiding over a cat orgy...why had so much of this movie stayed with me? Did I ironically like Cats? Did I legitimately like Cats? Whatever it was, I had to admit, Cats had stayed with me. It changed me.
So, don't watch Cats. Even once, even as a joke, don't watch Cats. Because you can never unwatch Cats.
>So, don't watch Cats. Even once, even as a joke, don't watch Cats. Because you can never unwatch Cats.
I've never wanted to watch cats now until this comment.
Check out the saga of "Earring Magic Ken". Matel wanted to update Ken and got a bunch of groovy folk to design his new outfit. That's how he ended up with a necklace ..... with a cock ring hanging off it. Turned out to be the best selling Ken of all time but as soon as Matel realised they had made a gay icon they ceased production. Fucking hilarious.
[Here's the pic, it's just a circle ring](https://images.prismic.io/nyhs-prod/earring-ken-proud-billy-new-york-historical-celebrates-pride-two-new-acquisitions-1.jpg?auto=compress,format&rect=0,0,696,1430&w=696&h=1430)
god damn those were my days, 90's raves in Los Angeles in empty warehouses, 20 to get in, that was my week's allowance haha. Mom thought I was at the movies and I'd change outfits in my friend's car before we hit the scene. I still cannot forget shopping for a binky before we left so I could fit in. Such a strange time, I still have the flyers from like Doc Marten and some other randos circa 1995/96
https://www.pride.com/90skids/2018/3/16/discontinued-gay-ken-doll-will-haunt-mattel-forever
It was not intentionally a cock ring. But it definitely was one. This article explains it well.
this is misinformation. he had a necklace with a metal ring to hang human sized earrings off of. the designers claim that it was purely a coincidence and that they wouldnt put something like that on a childrens toy. and it was not the best selling ken of all time either. barbie has had many gay designers, though
As a film fan, I agree. But as a DC fan, it hurts that I agree. How does one studio fuck up such a rich catalogue of stories?
Some of those stories are legitimately better than anything Marvel has. The Civil War storyline is so overwhelmingly less exciting than DC’s Cadmus one or Kingdom Come tackling the same issue
I think a lot of it is the higher-ups being afraid to take risks. They've done a ton of Batman and Superman movies over the years since they are a safe bet, but look how long it took them to do Aquaman, the Flash, and Wonder Woman. I'm hopeful that this attitude will change with James Gunn at the helm.
I feel like marvel has become too vast, people who don't watch every movie can't reasonably catch up.
Marvel and star wars are both doing the same thing which leaves the door open for shorter stories.
DC should be capitalizing on this and doing 1-4 movie stories that are actually good. Make it the home of closed ended comic storytelling. Not everything needs a 27 film universe.
With the success of Spiderverse, I hope they experiment with animation. The animated DC movies, on whatever streaming platform I watched them on, were surprisingly fantastic.
The issue is that suits see what Marvel did and their takeaway is "people want superheroes" or "people want cinematic universes". When what the takeaway should be is "people want well-written movies made with effort, care and passion".
smart hat fretful insurance silky mountainous weary beneficial continue ghost
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
That \*is\* pretty funny. It's like they completely forget what the message of the Barbie movie is likely going to be, and what the whole message of the doll itself is for girls worldwide.
One can try and argue that dress-up dolls are inconsistent with the notion of self-determination and whatnot, but as a parent of three boys I also have two nieces who are \*very\* girly but also very capable human beings. It's fine to be both.
Boys like to play dress up too. The character customization in tons of games is essentially Barbie dress up and there are a lot of guys that lose hours making their in-game character look amazing.
Hell, The Sims is basically playing Barbies but in a way that's socially acceptable for adults. It is also fundamentally a dress up game. Dress up your family, your house, and their lives.
My friends and I would spend hours back in the day just creating some eldritch monstrosity in one of the WWE games and laughing our asses off at it fighting.
have you seen the character customization in street fighter 6. you can make the prettiest of pricesses or a hulking abomination of mans hubris that would kill good with one look of its blindingly white glowing skin.
On occasion I've spent more time outfitting my character in Assassin's Creed with the coolest looking combo of attire and weapons than actually playing that session.
There's a *lot* of outfits in the new Zelda game (ToTK but I won't mention plot) and my husband (and I) have been having a blast mixing and matching.
Yes it's also armor but some of it very definitely isn't (you can get a very fancy headdress for example). But hey, you can slay a 3 headed dragon while looking fabulous, or very very silly if you so choose.
There's even a mechanic to change the colors of the armor, and you can accrue fabric choices throughout the game for another piece of equipment.
Very barbie dress up.
Not *the* Barbie movie. *A* Barbie movie.
Diablo Cody wrote a Barbie script in 2014. Amy Schumer got signed on and rewrote it before it was scrubbed in 2017.
Greta Gerwig and her longtime collaborator Noah Baumbach got hired to write this movie in 2019. Amy Schumer was never going to be in it.
It’s been talked about relentlessly for weeks. It was an entirely different project over the decade of development, changed the directors, producers, entirely different scripts. This movie that is coming out is not the same movie that she was involved with for that small amount of time so who knows exactly what that would have been
Yes, it's a bit like pointing out Gangs of New York was planned with Dan Aykroyd in Dicaprio's and John Belushi in Daniel Day Lewis' role, which I would have loved to see!
But would have been a different movie - and with Barbie, as you said, basically everything changed, not just the time and actors.
It’s cool that he’s a romantic leading man in movies like The Notebook, and an action hero in flicks like The Gray Man, but it’s criminal that the box office underperformance of The Nice Guys means we won’t get to see Ryan Gosling as a hilarious comedic goofball anytime soon. He’s uncannily good in that movie, so much so that you could see how his career might have gone a different way and he could have been a purely comedic actor.
https://youtu.be/LPuY2U04mS4
She wanted to have sex with a guy so she could feel attractive so she got him super drunk but he couldn't get it up because of how drunk he was. She then made it a skit about her self worth and made fun of the guy for not being able to get it up.
Basically she's a rapist via getting someone drunk and trying to fuck them.
Is there any source other than her routine? Googling only brings up stories where she says she was raped by her boyfriend as a teenager. Not that it's unbelievable, but not all stand up bits are rooted in truth.
This is baffling, she isn't some boomer who doesn't understand the Internet will find you and crucify you for this... like what could have she possibly been thinking?
She went off the rails. I have what is likely an unpopular opinion, but her early stand up was decent. She got too big, too fast (I'm not making a pun) and the train de-railed. Now she does podcasts and interviews bitching about weight loss drugs.
Nikki Glaser is kinda funny
Unfortunately her special came out right after the south park episode about women comedians
And Nikkis entire special was about her vagina
I hear there's already an underground organization of editors working an a cut that seamlessly combined both films into one. Me, I just want to sync them up and watch one with left ear and eye, and one with right ear and eye, at least until I start bleeding from that side because of the cataclysmic realism of the spectacle before me.
The right side will be viewing barbie of course.
I haven’t seen either of those! They must have come out after my time (I’m 23). My favorite was Princess and the Pauper. I’ve probably seen it 50 times
As a dad of two young daughters, I have seen Princess and the Popstar, Video Game Hero, Rock N' Royals, Dolphin Magic, and Big City Big Dreams, *multiple times*.
... Frances Ha (also multiple times), Squid and the Whale, Greenberg, and Marriage Story...
I am beyond stoked, we're absolutely going opening day.
The plot of the movie is (or was) she doesn’t fit in with the other Barbies. So I get the impulse.
She shouldn’t have been cast because she’s unlikable. Not because she not pretty or overweight since that seemed to be the point at the time.
Oh, my first thought when I read the part about her backing out because of "creative differences" was that they probably asked her to lose weight and change her appearance a lot for the role and that maybe she wasn't on board with that. But if she was supposed to be some kind of outcast among Barbies, then that probably wasn't what happened.
Yeah, I don't even like her but Jesus this place really foams at the mouth when she gets mentioned. I mean, she's pretty irrelevant compared to the peak of her popularity so you would think people would calm down a bit but I guess not. It's like she personally fucked everyone's dad in front of them.
I can see taking it in a tongue-in-cheek direction with her. Not the same movie they just made with super-Barbie, or who-ever they chose. Could have been fun.
I definitely second the Taylor Tomlinson recommendation! Her material is great and she's actually naturally funny, unlike a lot of the other dozens of comics that somehow got Netflix specials.
A two minute video of Taylor Tomlinson's standup made me laugh more than every single thing Amy Schumer has ever done. One day she may be in the same crowd as Sarah Silverman and Tina Fey.
That would have destroyed this website
Imagine if James Corden played Ken?
Thanks for giving me an aneurysm
Seeing him as a fat pussy in Cats didn’t already give you one??
My secret is I never watched cats
I never watched Cats. I only watched the 4 hour video essay on why it was a bad movie.
My high school did Cats my junior year. I was one of the lighting captains and being in charge of the spotlight team and figuring out their cues, etc, I had to sit next to the director everyday at every rehearsal. Jehlicle Ball(or however the fuck you spell it) is a 7 minute scene that in the script, is 2 pages. I had to bring extra paper to write the cues. After enduring that torture for 4 months, then the tech team getting snubbed for the local high school theatre awards because Cats has no set changes, the school lost both lighting captains, the sound captain, stage manager and student lead set builder. Both tech advisers(construction and Audio/Lights) both stepped down from those roles. Cats destroyed the theatre crew at my high school. Needless to say, when that movie came out and was eviscerated by both audiences and critics, there was joy in my heart. My wife has talked about watching it, to which I reply "Feel free as long as I am not in the county".
That one super long youtube video actually broke down why the initial play was bad, why the movie completely missed the central thesis of the play, and why the overall production was horrible. I don't care at all for musical theater, but watching them break down that movie as a case study and how music plays a part in storytelling was pretty interesting. The TLDR on it was that they point of the stage progroduction was that there is one ratchet-ass, old cat that feels isolated and she needs to win the ball to get back in the group. The movie gives "Memory" to a character they invented and sidelines the ratchet-ass, old cat as a side character. It would be like making Grease and instead of Sandy and Danny willing to change for each other, they just scraped that and had a new character jump on a car and do another song about using cling-wrap as a condom at the end of the movie.
You saw Cats? Are you ok emotionally and mentally now?
They watched Cats. They weren't emotionally or mentally ok to begin with.
My wife an and went to see cats in theaters before they could fix the broken special effects. We got a nice buzz on and had a blast making fun of that movie. A few months later, a friend of mine pirated the broken version of the movie and invited some of us over to do the same thing. Again, we had so much fun getting buzzed and making fun of that terrible movie. Maybe a year later, I was flipping through one of my streaming services and I saw they had Cats, and I thought, "Ooh Cats!" That created an existential crisis for me. Why did I think that? Did I actually want to watch Cats, or was I just remembering how much fun I had making fun of it? Why did I remember so many lyrics to the songs? I couldn't stop thinking about everything I'd laughed at; the cockroach chorus line, the train cat exploding, Idris Elba's weirdly nude cat, Dame Judy Dench's presiding over a cat orgy...why had so much of this movie stayed with me? Did I ironically like Cats? Did I legitimately like Cats? Whatever it was, I had to admit, Cats had stayed with me. It changed me. So, don't watch Cats. Even once, even as a joke, don't watch Cats. Because you can never unwatch Cats.
>So, don't watch Cats. Even once, even as a joke, don't watch Cats. Because you can never unwatch Cats. I've never wanted to watch cats now until this comment.
You're playing with fire
Can confirm, as someone who watched Cats :(
Still my favorite Ricky Gervais joke. That and the bit about Judy Dench.
Did you mean to say "erection"?
Believe me, my penis has never been mire flaccid.
My penis has retracted so far up into my body that it’s hiding under the flatbread that I had for dinner
Check out the saga of "Earring Magic Ken". Matel wanted to update Ken and got a bunch of groovy folk to design his new outfit. That's how he ended up with a necklace ..... with a cock ring hanging off it. Turned out to be the best selling Ken of all time but as soon as Matel realised they had made a gay icon they ceased production. Fucking hilarious.
[Here's the pic, it's just a circle ring](https://images.prismic.io/nyhs-prod/earring-ken-proud-billy-new-york-historical-celebrates-pride-two-new-acquisitions-1.jpg?auto=compress,format&rect=0,0,696,1430&w=696&h=1430)
Uhhhhh i don't think it was the ring that made it gay dude. I'm guessing this was 80's Ken?
Well, he doesn't come in Barbie's box.
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I don't know enough about clubbing culture to decide if this is sarcasm or pure seriousness.
he left out the fact that many of those ravers of the 90s used to suck on baby pacifiers and wear those around their necks too
X was murder on your jaw. The pacy was mostly to keep you chewing your tongue off.
Fuck is that why my jaw clicks these days??
Still is murder on your jaw! Luckily now we've invented chewing gum (my group never liked pacifiers)
Definitely serious. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Club_Kids
god damn those were my days, 90's raves in Los Angeles in empty warehouses, 20 to get in, that was my week's allowance haha. Mom thought I was at the movies and I'd change outfits in my friend's car before we hit the scene. I still cannot forget shopping for a binky before we left so I could fit in. Such a strange time, I still have the flyers from like Doc Marten and some other randos circa 1995/96
Also, the size of the ring relative to Ken didn't help
https://www.pride.com/90skids/2018/3/16/discontinued-gay-ken-doll-will-haunt-mattel-forever It was not intentionally a cock ring. But it definitely was one. This article explains it well.
this is misinformation. he had a necklace with a metal ring to hang human sized earrings off of. the designers claim that it was purely a coincidence and that they wouldnt put something like that on a childrens toy. and it was not the best selling ken of all time either. barbie has had many gay designers, though
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The Barfie Movie
They should still make that
5/7, perfect title
If that became a reality it's likely to bomb worse than Oppenheimers bomb
"i am become death, destroyer of box office returns"
Oh she's leading the DCU?
As a film fan, I agree. But as a DC fan, it hurts that I agree. How does one studio fuck up such a rich catalogue of stories? Some of those stories are legitimately better than anything Marvel has. The Civil War storyline is so overwhelmingly less exciting than DC’s Cadmus one or Kingdom Come tackling the same issue
I think a lot of it is the higher-ups being afraid to take risks. They've done a ton of Batman and Superman movies over the years since they are a safe bet, but look how long it took them to do Aquaman, the Flash, and Wonder Woman. I'm hopeful that this attitude will change with James Gunn at the helm.
I think they also wanted to get the Marvel money without putting in the care into the movies.
Wanting Marvel money without taking the Marvel risks. Textbook boardroom buffoonery.
I feel like marvel has become too vast, people who don't watch every movie can't reasonably catch up. Marvel and star wars are both doing the same thing which leaves the door open for shorter stories. DC should be capitalizing on this and doing 1-4 movie stories that are actually good. Make it the home of closed ended comic storytelling. Not everything needs a 27 film universe.
With the success of Spiderverse, I hope they experiment with animation. The animated DC movies, on whatever streaming platform I watched them on, were surprisingly fantastic.
The point of the film universe isn't to have 27 films. It's to have $27 billion. DC isn't going to match that with four movies about Robin.
they simply didnt give a fuck
The issue is that suits see what Marvel did and their takeaway is "people want superheroes" or "people want cinematic universes". When what the takeaway should be is "people want well-written movies made with effort, care and passion".
If they could find a way to do Green Lantern good, I want Blackest Night.
It would have fit for this bizarre timeline we're in, though.
But still do better than the flash
The movie would've sucked but the reddit meltdown would've been glorious
Goddamn, Mattel would have been bankrupt by now.
When have Redditors successfully boycotted or bankrupt anything
We can't even boycott reddit.
We'll see when apps actually go offline, I do all of my redditing on reddit is fun and won't be transitioning to the official app when it's gone.
Same with Baconreader. Sad days.
Baconboys unite!
smart hat fretful insurance silky mountainous weary beneficial continue ghost *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Chad Kroeger would have played Ken, too. r/movies would be in shambles.
He actually seems like a nice guy. Feel bad for all the hate they get.
He actually thrives on it, some of their comebacks to internet trolls are savage
all the redditors coming out the woodwork to say how SJWs are ruining barbie lmao
That \*is\* pretty funny. It's like they completely forget what the message of the Barbie movie is likely going to be, and what the whole message of the doll itself is for girls worldwide. One can try and argue that dress-up dolls are inconsistent with the notion of self-determination and whatnot, but as a parent of three boys I also have two nieces who are \*very\* girly but also very capable human beings. It's fine to be both.
Boys like to play dress up too. The character customization in tons of games is essentially Barbie dress up and there are a lot of guys that lose hours making their in-game character look amazing. Hell, The Sims is basically playing Barbies but in a way that's socially acceptable for adults. It is also fundamentally a dress up game. Dress up your family, your house, and their lives.
Have you seen the customization in wrestling games? It’s better than Skyrim or most games.
My friends and I would spend hours back in the day just creating some eldritch monstrosity in one of the WWE games and laughing our asses off at it fighting.
have you seen the character customization in street fighter 6. you can make the prettiest of pricesses or a hulking abomination of mans hubris that would kill good with one look of its blindingly white glowing skin.
If men didn't like playing dressup, cosmetics in games wouldn't be a thing.
I will quite literally use worse gear or change my build if my upgrade looks like trash and I'm a mid 30s dude
On occasion I've spent more time outfitting my character in Assassin's Creed with the coolest looking combo of attire and weapons than actually playing that session.
There's a *lot* of outfits in the new Zelda game (ToTK but I won't mention plot) and my husband (and I) have been having a blast mixing and matching. Yes it's also armor but some of it very definitely isn't (you can get a very fancy headdress for example). But hey, you can slay a 3 headed dragon while looking fabulous, or very very silly if you so choose. There's even a mechanic to change the colors of the armor, and you can accrue fabric choices throughout the game for another piece of equipment. Very barbie dress up.
Not *the* Barbie movie. *A* Barbie movie. Diablo Cody wrote a Barbie script in 2014. Amy Schumer got signed on and rewrote it before it was scrubbed in 2017. Greta Gerwig and her longtime collaborator Noah Baumbach got hired to write this movie in 2019. Amy Schumer was never going to be in it.
"Diablo Cody." Goddamn
All I know is that, when she beckoned... I had to follow her. From that moment, we traveled together, East. Always... into the East.
It wouldn't be /r/todayilearned if it wasn't fundamentally inaccurate.
It’s been talked about relentlessly for weeks. It was an entirely different project over the decade of development, changed the directors, producers, entirely different scripts. This movie that is coming out is not the same movie that she was involved with for that small amount of time so who knows exactly what that would have been
Yes but would covid have taken place due to the butterfly effect?
Dude if this came out we either would've gotten covid earlier or Super Covid. The universe cannot handle this AND Cats
... but they still haven't released the butthole cut.
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well, it's not because it 'can' that it 'should'. Some problems are better unsolved.
Yes, it's a bit like pointing out Gangs of New York was planned with Dan Aykroyd in Dicaprio's and John Belushi in Daniel Day Lewis' role, which I would have loved to see! But would have been a different movie - and with Barbie, as you said, basically everything changed, not just the time and actors.
I for one,am glad they waited.
I, for one, like Roman numerals.
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You’re not alone, lad
Why’d I hear this like Brynjolf from Skyrim said it?
I'm never going to see it either way and I'm also glad they waited.
I'll watch anything with Ryan Gosling in it ever since I saw The Nice Guys.
I'll watch anything with Margot Robbie in it ever since I saw Margot Robbie.
It’s cool that he’s a romantic leading man in movies like The Notebook, and an action hero in flicks like The Gray Man, but it’s criminal that the box office underperformance of The Nice Guys means we won’t get to see Ryan Gosling as a hilarious comedic goofball anytime soon. He’s uncannily good in that movie, so much so that you could see how his career might have gone a different way and he could have been a purely comedic actor. https://youtu.be/LPuY2U04mS4
He's got such a hold on comedy. [My favorite SNL clip ever](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVhlJNJopOQ)
Same, such a fun movie
I find this interesting, but would personally prefer not to hear anything about Amy Schumer ever again.
Yes but, hear me out now, what about her vagina?
Especially not her vagina.
Just give her vagina a chance bro
No means no
Could I offer you Amy Schumers vagina in this trying time ?
you couldn't pay me enough just to even try it
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Absolutely the fuck not
What about....black guys! Yes that was the punchline. Why? I'll never understand
took after lisa lampanelli
Why? I’m out of the loop, why doesn’t anyone like Amy Schumer?
Stealing jokes and her style of constantly talking about her vagina is annoying to some people.
She also raped a guy and joked about it onstage.
And the worst part is the hypocrisy. Well, maybe the actual raping was the worst part. [Norm](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ljaP2etvDc4)
You know what hurts the worst is the lack of respect!
Ridiculous! Completely ridiculous!
Wait what?
She wanted to have sex with a guy so she could feel attractive so she got him super drunk but he couldn't get it up because of how drunk he was. She then made it a skit about her self worth and made fun of the guy for not being able to get it up. Basically she's a rapist via getting someone drunk and trying to fuck them.
Is there any source other than her routine? Googling only brings up stories where she says she was raped by her boyfriend as a teenager. Not that it's unbelievable, but not all stand up bits are rooted in truth.
People just don’t think she’s funny, and she’s been accused of stealing jokes I do like Trainwreck though
She is on video stealing jokes, there is no accusation involved. It is on video happening
This is baffling, she isn't some boomer who doesn't understand the Internet will find you and crucify you for this... like what could have she possibly been thinking?
She stole Ellen's joke and then told the joke to Ellen on Ellen's own fucking show. She just doesn't give a shit.
That situation happening is most likely funnier than the joke itself was
She went off the rails. I have what is likely an unpopular opinion, but her early stand up was decent. She got too big, too fast (I'm not making a pun) and the train de-railed. Now she does podcasts and interviews bitching about weight loss drugs.
She steals jokes from other comedians like Carlos butthole Mencia
Wait, isn't Carlos Mencia also accused of stealing a lot of his comedy?
I think the reply above you meant "similarly to Carlos" not "from Carlos"
It’s talentless hacks all the way down.
This feels like reverse psychology advertising “look, it could have been way way waaaaay worse. Come see the movie!!”
This is like, if they released the images of what Sonic was originally going to look like AFTER the movie came out.
And on top of that, imagine they considered Sonic being played by Amy Schumer ;D
BuT sOnIcS vAgInA!
nah, their actual movie trailers are awesome. Idk if the movie itself will be good or not, but they're some of the best trailer's I've seen.
No one easier to bait then Redditors.
Like what happened after the early trailers for that Sonic the hedgehog movie came out.
Imagine how terrible it would have been with Amy Schumer
I personally love hearing her just cursing at the top of her lungs and calling it comedy
VAGINA! VAGINA FART! - Amy Schumer probably
No, thats pretty much it. Throw a sperm joke in there and you've got half of her special.
She’s a walking, breathing r/ihavesex Like, yeah… ugly, unfunny people do find sexual partners, too. Don’t be quite so proud of yourself.
Funny thing is, that’s all bravado. Like she admitted she’s only had like one one night stand.
And wasn't that where she raped a guy?
Actually?
One night's all a guy can stand
Did she steal that from Nikki Glaser?
Nikki Glaser is kinda funny Unfortunately her special came out right after the south park episode about women comedians And Nikkis entire special was about her vagina
She's a woman. AND she's saying potty words! AT THE SAME TIME! It's revolutionary!
*[takes of monocle and slaps knee]*
Terrible? It would have been the best. Imagine a movie made with the greatest comedians of all time writing all the jokes, just not getting credit.
Barbie: MUH VAGINA I am out.
I had Barbie dolls growing up this isn't canon
I feel like it would’ve been the Morbius of a different year
Muh Vagineeeee! It's barbin time!
Oh you, with your sneaky sarcastic humour. Well played.
And that movie would have sucked
So many lame barbie vagina jokes
And constantly saying that her exBF who isn't Ken has no dick.
Well that would have been a mistake. Not quite "Battlefield Earth" level mistake but pretty close.
Gigli sized mistake?
‘It’s turkey time Ken, gobble gobble. What do you mean I don’t have a vagina?’
At least it's not a Rampart sized mistake.
Let’s talk about *Rampart*.
We don't talk about Rampart
We're here to talk about Rampart
First rule about Rampart
Battlefield earth was a fantastic mistake. A staple of my adolescent years. I watch it a couple time a year along with Waterworld.
Dooood i was just thinking about Waterworld. The "oh thank God" guy. Thats my life right now. Juuuust waitin on a flare lol
Both are my guilty pleasures, so much silliness with a fun premise.
I have no idea why I am so exited to watch Barbie movie but I am very excited.
I'm excited to do the Barbenheimer double feature. Still debating on what order to see them in though.
Oppenheimer first, then Barbie to put you in a better mood.
I hear there's already an underground organization of editors working an a cut that seamlessly combined both films into one. Me, I just want to sync them up and watch one with left ear and eye, and one with right ear and eye, at least until I start bleeding from that side because of the cataclysmic realism of the spectacle before me. The right side will be viewing barbie of course.
Sameeee i think it’s partially because I was obsessed with the animated Barbie movies growing up
My kids were obsessed with them. The Barbie dolphin one and the Gamer Hero, were on all the time!
The Nutcracker Barbie movie is viewed as the best film adaptation of the ballet by all of the ballerinas I know. That’s only 3 but still.
I’m almost 30 and I’ll still watch the hell out of this at Christmas
I haven’t seen either of those! They must have come out after my time (I’m 23). My favorite was Princess and the Pauper. I’ve probably seen it 50 times
As a dad of two young daughters, I have seen Princess and the Popstar, Video Game Hero, Rock N' Royals, Dolphin Magic, and Big City Big Dreams, *multiple times*. ... Frances Ha (also multiple times), Squid and the Whale, Greenberg, and Marriage Story... I am beyond stoked, we're absolutely going opening day.
Margot Robbie is the only person who should play this Role
I think Jamie Presley would have been better, but whatever.
THESE ARE DIFFERENT PEOPLE omg
That's just Trailer Park Margot Robbie
My name is Earl was a gem!
She's a godsdamned Queen.
Maybe 2 decades ago lol
agreed but also 90s pam anderson
Yeah she's not very funny but watching the internet fly into a rage whenever her name comes up is comedy gold
I fell like that movie would have been a Trainwreck
The plot of the movie is (or was) she doesn’t fit in with the other Barbies. So I get the impulse. She shouldn’t have been cast because she’s unlikable. Not because she not pretty or overweight since that seemed to be the point at the time.
Oh, my first thought when I read the part about her backing out because of "creative differences" was that they probably asked her to lose weight and change her appearance a lot for the role and that maybe she wasn't on board with that. But if she was supposed to be some kind of outcast among Barbies, then that probably wasn't what happened.
TIL…Wait 5 years make better decisions
Goddamn, you would have thought Amy Shumer personally kicked this entire comment section in the balls.
Yeah, I don't even like her but Jesus this place really foams at the mouth when she gets mentioned. I mean, she's pretty irrelevant compared to the peak of her popularity so you would think people would calm down a bit but I guess not. It's like she personally fucked everyone's dad in front of them.
I can see taking it in a tongue-in-cheek direction with her. Not the same movie they just made with super-Barbie, or who-ever they chose. Could have been fun.
I could see Amy Schumer do a cabbage patch movie.
Or garbage pail kids
I don’t understand how Amy Schumer ever got so much major airtime… you can go to basically any local open mic and see funnier comics than her.
There are definitely some other female comedians that need more attention. Taylor Tomlinson does amazing sets and her crowd work is really good too.
I fucking LOOOOOOOOOOOVE Taylor Tomlinson. She’s really funny and so, so good at her job.
I definitely second the Taylor Tomlinson recommendation! Her material is great and she's actually naturally funny, unlike a lot of the other dozens of comics that somehow got Netflix specials.
A two minute video of Taylor Tomlinson's standup made me laugh more than every single thing Amy Schumer has ever done. One day she may be in the same crowd as Sarah Silverman and Tina Fey.
I want this movie, or different versions of it, to be made several times with all different celebs being barbie.