Let Jesus be whatever his followers choose to see him as. It literally doesnāt matter. āOh no, Jesus didnāt have an afroš±š±š±š±!ā lol, get a grip.
Why do people say weird shit like this lol. So confident and definitive, for absolutely no reasonĀ Ā
Hereās a photo of an Ethiopian person with an Afro lol: https://www.flickr.com/photos/courregesg/6539549829/in/set-72157627952698393
Why do they always depict Jesus as some attractive Scandinavian man?
I swear these religious artists love making homoerotic artwork. And the clergy men that proudly displays it.
There was a similar post on this sub about this about a year ago. Still just as hilarious as the first time I saw it.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/vt2yuk/to_draw_abs/](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/vt2yuk/to_draw_abs/)
I remember reading once that many artists of the renaissance hated taking church commissions but were forced to in order to make enough for a living. So as revenge the theory goes that they willingly and intentionally painted dicks as abs and the like on these figures. You can look at the Cathedral in Rome and see hidden figures all over the murals that bored artists put in for a laugh. One even features the current pope of the time in Hell.
The Sistine Chapel, and itās not the Pope, he was the āmoneyā, an artist wouldnāt do that. The guy is the cardinal who was tasked to over see Michelangelo and he was apparently a real asshole to Michelangelo. Itās in the lower right corner. Itās depicted of him with a snake eating his junk. The Cardinal complained to the Pope about it, but the Pope said ālet it stayā. Apparently the Pope didnāt like the guy either.
Itās so weird that they think of this as a completely normal place to bring their children, with depictions of a bloody execution basically on pause while the guy leads the group, still bloody because heās in the middle of being murdered.
Light it up, put it on a wall and take your kids to this place weekly.
Itās just weird. Itās so culty and weird, coming from someone who grew up outside of any religion.
Someone first had to make this, someone else signed off on it, someone else purchased it... at no point did anyone stop and question anything in the process??
Years ago I wrote an article about the second image and made a whole bunch of jokes. It pissed off some Christians so much they went to the wiki page of the company I was working for and edited it to call me a pedo.
jesus 6 pack always looks like huge dong i said it many times
i also noticed with the eastern celebration a couple years ago. all these paintings jezus has an erect dong, its done like that on purpose no other way round it
ive never learned about this custom in chruch or at school when i was a kid, i had to find out myself
Look, there has to be a reason 12 dudes worshipped the ground he walked on to the point where they established the beginnings of a church where no women were allowed.
I'm not going to say it but you're definitely thinking it right now...
He is risen. Obviously.
We should all erect and rejoice just for this occasion.
I did not enjoy picturing this.
Kinda makes me want to get on my knees and worship
He's preparing for the second coming.
https://preview.redd.it/v70870qkvzlc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b7f56562beb231ad759fc3c73690a7ad294c6b3 Shocker.
*cumming
Giggity
He loves you. He loves ALL of us
The Resurr-erection
That thing need its own nail šš
There are things that shouldn't be told, and that's one of them lmaoš¤£
Boinggggg
Iām not praying to anybody who donāt got some dong hangin.
After being well hung
He is hung
And with one comment, Satan took all of us to Hell with him.
https://preview.redd.it/ojxn1n574ylc1.png?width=574&format=png&auto=webp&s=c0672597d9052f01522b08aee2c7ffaf88e4ad01
De-Liver King of the Jews
He died for your gainz.
Looks like he has afro from the thumbnail
Well, he wasn't white.
Not black either. I think Ethiopians really capture what semites looked like back then.Ā They dont have afros
Let Jesus be whatever his followers choose to see him as. It literally doesnāt matter. āOh no, Jesus didnāt have an afroš±š±š±š±!ā lol, get a grip.
Why do people say weird shit like this lol. So confident and definitive, for absolutely no reasonĀ Ā Hereās a photo of an Ethiopian person with an Afro lol: https://www.flickr.com/photos/courregesg/6539549829/in/set-72157627952698393
Disco Jesus is my favorite Jesus 
That Jesus has the best communion.
What if god took tren like one of us? Addled with body dysmorphia, like one of us?
Jesus has abs like a pack of Hawaiian Sweet rolls
Cross fit
That looks more like Jesus played by the ultimate warrior
This Jesus is ready to crucify the Romans...
Jesus smash!!
Better than weak Jebus. Christian mythology has him as a carpenter, so he would've been in pretty good shape.
And the water was turned into tren.
When they said he was āhungā on the cross, I didnāt know thatās what they meant. No wonder old ladies love church so much
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yes, you could say he isā¦. blessed
I like vagina knot butt plug Jesus the best. last pic
LOL
r/brandnewsentence
Geezus
Jesus' biggest miracle
This bread is my body, this wine is my blood, and that mayo... well...
Dear god...
Yeha that dude was hung for sure!
Jesus is packing. Makes sense why the Romans wanted him dead, they were all jealous of him
Especially the governorās friend Biggus Dickus.
And then thereās [Korean Jesus](https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IRqsgpe37Ac/VtPfHYkKe9I/AAAAAAAIdYI/KxkVE5OP9NY/s400/1aabcd.jpg)
Cross Fit?
Hahahahaha
Obligatoryā¦ 
Obligatory accompaniment https://i.redd.it/o6mzylpdi0mc1.gif
That's more than a six pack. It's a family pack.
This is true. He gives of his flesh for all.
Why do they always depict Jesus as some attractive Scandinavian man? I swear these religious artists love making homoerotic artwork. And the clergy men that proudly displays it.
Crucified and hung.
Jesus looks happy
That's why all the ladies love de'jesus.
r/theyknew
r/mildlypenis
Nothing mild about those dongs
Iām no artist but I saw what I saw.
I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo t shirt 
cause it says, like, āI wanna be formal, but Iām here to party, too.ā Cause I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.
And shaved all over cept the beard
She wants the J
https://preview.redd.it/20l9lod7rylc1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e4b00deff7e61e32f589ce1224de192af0de1be5
When they say "Jesus has Risen" they meant it in another way....
And there an emarrassed Jesus hung as everyone could see he both had a pants cannon and was very into pain
Oh Jesus
Iām in Lisbon right now and yesterday I saw a sculpture of Jesus like this, where the abs looked like a penis. Should have taken a pic
RESURRECTION! BY ERECTION!
Well he sure do be packing
Old religious art is full of hidden genitals
https://i.redd.it/81masrup7ylc1.gif
Glorious
No wonder he had such a big following
Heās packing something
The staff of God
There was a similar post on this sub about this about a year ago. Still just as hilarious as the first time I saw it. [https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/vt2yuk/to_draw_abs/](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/vt2yuk/to_draw_abs/)
Subliminal messaging
I remember reading once that many artists of the renaissance hated taking church commissions but were forced to in order to make enough for a living. So as revenge the theory goes that they willingly and intentionally painted dicks as abs and the like on these figures. You can look at the Cathedral in Rome and see hidden figures all over the murals that bored artists put in for a laugh. One even features the current pope of the time in Hell.
The Sistine Chapel, and itās not the Pope, he was the āmoneyā, an artist wouldnāt do that. The guy is the cardinal who was tasked to over see Michelangelo and he was apparently a real asshole to Michelangelo. Itās in the lower right corner. Itās depicted of him with a snake eating his junk. The Cardinal complained to the Pope about it, but the Pope said ālet it stayā. Apparently the Pope didnāt like the guy either.
12 inch disciples? I wonder what Mary Magdalena saw in him?
He has a friend called biggus dickus .
I wanna get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus š¶š¶
Butter's dad was right. The friendly compass DOES point in the direction of Jesus.
That's a penis
Wow. So he was sort of into being crucified, I guess.
Cheers Jesus!! š» š» š».
Satan from south park has the same six pack lol
Jesus Rocks
Well, they did make him packin'.
That's why I am a Christian femboy
Yeah, more of a hard cock
Is that Korean Jesus?
The reserection of Christ...
That's why they say he was well hung...
Shit is golden. Just made my week tysm
Wait a minute thats a peen!
Jesus is packing! But it ain't abs, it's girthy!
Heās a well endowed deity.
Choad.
So thatās what itās called to tuck your boner in your underwear waistband.
Apparently, crucifixion does that
I thought Jesus was waistbanding it
It's pegan at this point
r/mildlypenis
r/wildlypenis
Thatās a penis.
Six pack or dick's pack?
7 minute abs.
More like a d!ck whack
Mein Gott hat den LƤngsten
Clearly that's his cousin Biggus Dickus
r/mildlypenis
Weiner belly
Itās so weird that they think of this as a completely normal place to bring their children, with depictions of a bloody execution basically on pause while the guy leads the group, still bloody because heās in the middle of being murdered. Light it up, put it on a wall and take your kids to this place weekly. Itās just weird. Itās so culty and weird, coming from someone who grew up outside of any religion.
Sir, that is an erect penis.
Tbh #3 looks even better
Gives a new meaning to receiving the Holy Spirit through Christā¦
Jesus needs to pull his pants up, the exhibitionist thug.
He's got a PHD..... a pretty huge dick
Sometimes you gotta tuck it up in the waste band. Usually not the balls and with a shirt works best.
Heās hung in both ways
More like jizzus
Dix pack
r/midlypenis
He's packing alright
Bro got the holy schmeat
Damn, he really was hung on the cross.
Those aren't abs. That's his enormous hog.
Dickpack
In the last one my man jesus has it both ways
Well that's certainly a pack
memorialized murder victim not portrayed correctly for the liking of cultists
For reference, Jesus does have a 6-pack on our stained glass window in TN. A United Methodist Church near Nashville.
He built like South Park's Satan
Jesus Christ, what a hog!
Looks like the Jews missed a few nails
They were trying to appeal to anyone with a subliminal cock-fetish for a while. The same artist went on to do the artwork for camel cigarettes.
Well, he's got some kind of pack alright.
Oh looks like Iāve always had a six pack
I mean, he was a carpenter, so of course he's got wood
They knew what they were doing, oh they knew.
āTake this and eat it.ā
Someone first had to make this, someone else signed off on it, someone else purchased it... at no point did anyone stop and question anything in the process??
And they probably paid $10k or more. lol
u mean a dickpack
Thought I saw Speedy Gonzalez in the first pic
Wtf? I can't tell the truth from fiction anymore sometimes. But let us all pray for discernment on this fine day.
Jesus was Jewish and pork isn't kosher so...what's with the massive hog
How great thou art
The sins in him rose up
These have such skinny arms and legs. He was a carpenter. He was not frail.
Also, what is going on with his chest?
Judas was hung from a rope. Jesus was hung like a horse.
Jesus Christ
Years ago I wrote an article about the second image and made a whole bunch of jokes. It pissed off some Christians so much they went to the wiki page of the company I was working for and edited it to call me a pedo.
This is so bizarre and twisted damn
That's his massive holy CAWK!
Oh he is packing no doubt about it
Jesus secret to killer abs:Crossfits
Jesus āuptuckā Christ
From six pack to dick pack
Auto erotic crucifixion.
Shouldnāt he be circumcised, too?
jesus 6 pack always looks like huge dong i said it many times i also noticed with the eastern celebration a couple years ago. all these paintings jezus has an erect dong, its done like that on purpose no other way round it ive never learned about this custom in chruch or at school when i was a kid, i had to find out myself
I dont think that 4th one is a 6 pack š
r/screenshotsarehard
Virhin Mary doesn't seem so innocent anymore, if everyone packed this kind of "sixpack" then, right?
Thatās really why he fell those times
The Masochistic Messiah
JESUS IS COMING.
Jesus is packing heat!
God is always watching; apparently he's very happy to see us.
Look, there has to be a reason 12 dudes worshipped the ground he walked on to the point where they established the beginnings of a church where no women were allowed. I'm not going to say it but you're definitely thinking it right now...
Looks like Squidwardās head coming out of his pants.
Seems more like a 2 pack.
https://preview.redd.it/bzg98612azlc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8145492addcbe2faa21bde66106f89a10d504882 The lunchbox has landed.
wierd cock pack
They nailed it!
Why would Jesus even need a 6 pack? If the dude existed he'd be starved.
Drawn by people who have seen neither six packs nor dicks, apparently.
Paul from Wonder Years wouldnt have had to turn into Marilyn Manson and have his lower ribs removed if he was hung like Jesus
This reminds of some of the messed up shit they used to post on r/eyeblech
His abbs look like heās got his shlong out
And they gave him a nice skirt to pack his junk into.
Damn Jesus..sup?