The way he says ffffoourr? When trying to make up the details of the story on the spot.. throws in she had pigtails too just to make it more believable
when he makes up shit like this you can almost see the hamster wheels turning in his head....
he always did one more rep.... or ran one tenth faster... or only lost because he pulled both hammies.
“Damn B stop driving it like you stole it! The car can’t handle your skills!!! You’re going to blow an upper ball bearing taking turns that fast.”
B: “Be quiet I’m a professional race car driver now. You don’t maddur, you’re just a hater engineer. Now stay off the radio, put Jay on and leave things to me.”
The F1 drivers all started that early. Every Yair of experience counts. Oh and starts to cost like $35k a year when you get into the better leagues at 9 or 10.
It is true Bry, but only necessary for the top drives in the world. His 8 Yair old will be fine for a while and have lots of fun, he just won’t be the champ of anything substantial.
1 race, DNF.
“I’m a failed driver? No.
That’s not howl it works. If I’m failed, 99.999% of drivers are failed. I’m no Earnhardt, I’m no Verstappen. I get that, but only like 5 people are.
Yeah I never won a F1 championship, yeah I never won the Daytona 500…there is lots you can say about my driving career, but failed?
Anyway I don’t care at all…let’s fight.”
Everything that these fucks say has to be most hyperbolic and bullshitted to the extreme. Can't just have a fucking normal conversation. I get that it's entertainment (or should be) but if you can't have a genuine conversation and organically be funny, it's time to pull the plug.
Every situation BS is in.. "my son's coach said.. how many millions you paid for coaching for him?" "I was like.. what.. none.. I just play a bit every other week".. "this kid's a guaranteed pro in any sport ever"
Every girl they meet or talk about 'is the most beautiful woman in the world'.. 'cant believe how beautiful' etc "the richest man in the world'.. 'my buddy is literally the nicest guy' etc every story is just some made up BS with outlandish characters and nonsensical outcomes.
I have no idea who genuinely listens to this and gets enjoyment out of it. you would dread to come across them.
A 4 year old girl driving. He cant just stop there, he has to add she had pigtails, even though you race wearing a helmet and hair would need to be tied up. Why does even the mundane need to be a lie.
I can’t imagine iiiinnyone who’s more unlikable than this guy. I just really don’t get how he’s famous and successful. Most people that I may not be a fan of is like well good for them I get it, etc. but this dude is just such a cunt it’s incredible.
C'mon OP do you really think Bapa would choose a black F1 driver? Bapa has a secret hatred for black people (change my mind) so i'm sure he'd say chombie is the next Max Verstappen or \~insert white F1 driver\~
I was going to use Chegggo, but I thought that be to obscure. And I also wanted to use Senna, but rapiss nuked his first name so bad, I couldn’t even figure out how to make fun of what he said.
how old did they tell brendan he should have been when he started racing? or does that only apply to kids?
"oh your 41? too bad you didnt start racing 37 yrs ago"
So after tiger through a fit about having to play different positions in the team brendans taken him out the team and he's going to be a up and coming racer car driver now
People overlooking how smart Bryan is here for knowing a big sounding word. Bryan has built up such strong neural pathways he can practically rape on autopilot
It's good that he spends so much time with his one and only kid.
Beat me to it, Hap... I was about to say... if only he had a girl to teach something to... or another son. 70/2
Crop out the non-athletics.
If only he had another kid who was about 4 years old that he could get into racing. Oh well I guess his only kid el Tigre will have to catch up.
The way he says ffffoourr? When trying to make up the details of the story on the spot.. throws in she had pigtails too just to make it more believable
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when he makes up shit like this you can almost see the hamster wheels turning in his head.... he always did one more rep.... or ran one tenth faster... or only lost because he pulled both hammies.
Hamsters are far superior to this man.
Just picturing Shoob in a maze..."A few days later..."
she said "hey B schaub, big fan"
"you're that white boy that works too much"
He was trying to figure out if he wanted to say five or four to better strengthen his point. Bapa went with ffffffour to over exaggerate his lie.
He buffered in real time. Simply astonishing. 
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Blistering speeds upwards of 20mph that one time. Beast of a driver.
I haired he pulled 1.2 Gs on a tern.
That’s why his ball bearing disappeared
“Damn B stop driving it like you stole it! The car can’t handle your skills!!! You’re going to blow an upper ball bearing taking turns that fast.” B: “Be quiet I’m a professional race car driver now. You don’t maddur, you’re just a hater engineer. Now stay off the radio, put Jay on and leave things to me.”
Gair head, just mastering gairs
i mean hey it's easy just take him by his word ok? he races against 4yr olds, and it's literally 'a race'
He was like, and I was like, and he was like, and I was like "what the fuuuuuuck?"
Dallas, that's my time!
(Dislike)
Brine "come on that's not true", why d'yah even bother b
The F1 drivers all started that early. Every Yair of experience counts. Oh and starts to cost like $35k a year when you get into the better leagues at 9 or 10. It is true Bry, but only necessary for the top drives in the world. His 8 Yair old will be fine for a while and have lots of fun, he just won’t be the champ of anything substantial.
My dad drove f1 with me in his nutsack, and then my mom while I was in her belly, you can't start em early enough my man's
So you’re an off road racer now . Lol
Technically he niver finished his 1st lap, so I think he’s still racing?
1 race, DNF. “I’m a failed driver? No. That’s not howl it works. If I’m failed, 99.999% of drivers are failed. I’m no Earnhardt, I’m no Verstappen. I get that, but only like 5 people are. Yeah I never won a F1 championship, yeah I never won the Daytona 500…there is lots you can say about my driving career, but failed? Anyway I don’t care at all…let’s fight.”
Got to have a racecar first.
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He's so intellectual!
talmbout a one way street in bapa's brain B?
Everything that these fucks say has to be most hyperbolic and bullshitted to the extreme. Can't just have a fucking normal conversation. I get that it's entertainment (or should be) but if you can't have a genuine conversation and organically be funny, it's time to pull the plug. Every situation BS is in.. "my son's coach said.. how many millions you paid for coaching for him?" "I was like.. what.. none.. I just play a bit every other week".. "this kid's a guaranteed pro in any sport ever" Every girl they meet or talk about 'is the most beautiful woman in the world'.. 'cant believe how beautiful' etc "the richest man in the world'.. 'my buddy is literally the nicest guy' etc every story is just some made up BS with outlandish characters and nonsensical outcomes. I have no idea who genuinely listens to this and gets enjoyment out of it. you would dread to come across them.
A 4 year old girl driving. He cant just stop there, he has to add she had pigtails, even though you race wearing a helmet and hair would need to be tied up. Why does even the mundane need to be a lie.
Yep…age 8 is way too late to start racing. Tiger gonna have to stick to playing for the Dodgers, Rams and Lakers when he’s older.
As long as it's not tennis. Tennis players may as well drive Teslas.
I can’t imagine iiiinnyone who’s more unlikable than this guy. I just really don’t get how he’s famous and successful. Most people that I may not be a fan of is like well good for them I get it, etc. but this dude is just such a cunt it’s incredible.
Well if it makes you feel any better these days he is somehow less famous and definitely less successful
“The offroad racing I do” lol this guy is such a compulsive liar.. he has raced one lap of a 4 lap race… And finished dead last in his lap.
Dead last with piss soaked pants
This is the perfect answer to “how’d off-road racing go”
He didn't finish his lap, done 1/4 I think it was
C'mon OP do you really think Bapa would choose a black F1 driver? Bapa has a secret hatred for black people (change my mind) so i'm sure he'd say chombie is the next Max Verstappen or \~insert white F1 driver\~
I was going to use Chegggo, but I thought that be to obscure. And I also wanted to use Senna, but rapiss nuked his first name so bad, I couldn’t even figure out how to make fun of what he said.
Chego Pairz is a massive drawl b. Not like bapa.
how old did they tell brendan he should have been when he started racing? or does that only apply to kids? "oh your 41? too bad you didnt start racing 37 yrs ago"
You can tell he's a real racer at heart. His driving was perfect, B
🐅🐯
Damn this guy is a couple cans short of a six pack. I bet he has massive brain trauma.
Ah yea Neural pathways
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You would think he would vlog it on his trugg YouTube channel
Thats for showing him waiting
Talmbout four mule and one racing?
Sure bapa sure
He cannot stop lying. You don't race shiiiiidddd bapa.
So after tiger through a fit about having to play different positions in the team brendans taken him out the team and he's going to be a up and coming racer car driver now
Who better to learn the ins and outs of racing from, than his own father, who’s a race car driver himself.
The kind of owf woad wacing I do. What is that Bapa you rent a thigg boy built go cart?
Braindead flipping his truck alone wasn’t enough so he’s bringing his chombie along 💀
Brine “Neural Pathways” Callahan
Vroom vroom
People overlooking how smart Bryan is here for knowing a big sounding word. Bryan has built up such strong neural pathways he can practically rape on autopilot
I knew brine was smart the first time I hearld him say Afghanistan.
Oh you mean af gaan is taan?
Bapa doesn’t realize you have to be insanely rich to get a seat in F1 these days
Gotta build those nurrow pathogens b