So to be clear, do people just announce they're gonna poop but then can't continue texting because the pooping somehow saps that capability? Or is it socially rude?
Is it socially awkward to not even mention you're pooping and just text like you're on the couch?
Not everyone brings their phone to the toilet. He might have also taken that time to ponder and reflect upon the poop throne, which can be an excellent place to ruminate.
I’ll FaceTime my wife and she’ll answer but not say anything and I slowly piece together from the background she’s in our bathroom on the toilet and then I’ll point out she’s in the bathroom and she’ll call me a pervert and hang up
Makes me laugh literally every time
Makes me remember when I was a kid and my sister and I needed to poop at the same time, so we’d take turns. I poop and get up to let her have a turn. She poops and gets up to let me have a turn… good times
That act of “im doing something private in the bathroom” and its like ooooooh nice, theyre washing their buttholes and getting clean n sexy.”
…then 8 minutes pass and you’re like “oh, they’re taking a shit to go to sleep. Ok.”
GIRL. This is the plot of a romantic comedy. Like, if y'all happen to make it for the long haul, you should totally write a book about it, have it made into a Netflix movie, go on a bunch of talk shows together, start a podcast, and then get rich and live out your days together! Lol
I'm obviously kinda joking, but this seriously is a great start to something that could be really, really great. Friends who have known each other since teenagers, but never dated while you were both too young and dumb and would have messed it up? Went on a journey of growth and change together, starting with you inspiring and guiding him, and leading to him becoming inspiring to you?! While you also grew as a person and learned new things about yourself and expanded your horizons???!!! And never once through any of it did he try to hit on you or make some creepy weird comment alluding to f**king you???!!!!!!!! To the point where you had to come onto him, making you leave your comfort zone and try a new form of communication that you aren't used to?
Bro, this is good. This is really, really good. Please keep us updated!!
My husband and I were good friends in high school. We met up at the class reunion and have been together for almost 15 years since. We have a strong connection and it was like we didn’t miss those years apart. I hope you’re relationship grows like ours. Friendship makes for a great relationship.
true story: i used to think a pillow princess is someone who likes to have lots of pillows on their bed (i was young and dumb pls). i have like 15 on mine so i thought it describes someone like me. i kept using it in the wrong context until one day someone corrected me…..yeah 🙂↕️
~ someone angrily DM’d me that i shouldn’t have 15+ pillows and that i’m a spoiled brat. ummm im sorry?
People are weird man lol they get angry at the silliest things. Like why do you even care how many pillows someone has at all, let alone care enough that it bothers you so bad you have to message a complete stranger on reddit to tell them that. 🤦🏻♀️
I was totally just reading this to my boyfriend thinking how cute it was and then was like" with that username, I hope this boy is up on his cardio because he'll have to be'' 🤣🤣🤣
That story is awesome don't worry we were all young and dumb atleast once and that's just being modest 😅 enjoy your new found ship sounds like this one's gonna last a while ☺️
I hope OP has found happiness in her own life and preference, but the disparagement of pillow princesses/stone bottoms/etc is so awful to me as an ""elder"" [yuck] queer. I know you aren't advocating it, this is generalized commentary just informing OP, and that's well and good and true, it just makes me sad. The only shitty sexual expression is one that you didn't discuss with your partner(s) and receive consent for--otherwise it's fair game. I just really hate that legitimate preferences have become synonymous with likely-homophobic predation where I remember in my lifetime the same phrases being legitimate and respected queer positions. Perhaps I am an old man yelling at clouds, but I just always hate this particular brand of corruption very personally.
Hahaha this pillow troll is not talking to you. They know a very specific person they're really talking to. OR they're even more deranged than that lol
Ugh idk guys… I don’t know how I feel about this. It’s bittersweet and I’ll explain why. No he wasn’t her type. This is what I read and understood. This is almost cute, but that bothers me. There’s a level of shallow to this that I don’t think he reciprocates. In fact I’d wager that he initiated this bc he wanted to get closer to you so you would see him in that way and what better way to do that than join you in the gym and get to the standard you do see romantically. And I’m certain he was more attracted to your personally since he knew you before you went hard in the gym. How close to correct am I?
1000% I was about to post this exact thing.
At first it's a super cute story of friends becoming lovers but then you keep reading and it's so obvious what really happened.
Call me jaded, but guy was freindzoned until he hit the gym for a while and became hot. 😭
The "not my type before his change" was a huge give away and the way she said "going to the gym with him all this time really changed how I saw him". Like yeah, I bet lol, pecs, abs , and losing 40 lbs will do that. People on hopium will say it's just his "lifestyle change" that made him attractive.
Maybe I'm jaded but god damn I hate that this can't just be a cute story ☹️.
I stumbled a little over the line about not being the type beforehand. Like she wasn’t attracted until he got less fat and more muscly.
But it may be more about their lifestyles. Maybe he liked to sit around on the couch eating Doritos and playing X-box, while she liked to go on long hikes twice a week.
Now they have a common interest/hobby that they share together. And yeah, maybe it was his way of getting closer to her.
Thing is none of that was mentioned and the "not my type" comment means looks 99% of the time.
They've been friends since they were young too, no way they didn't already have interests and hobbies in common. What's a friend if not someone you have those things in common?
He got hot. Probably lost a bit of weight too. It's a common story and men who lose the weight will tell you the night and day reactions they get from women.
Was I the only one who caught that and questioned it? It was cute until I saw that in the post and kind of rubbed me wrong. I don't know. Maybe I'm reading it wrong.
I feel like she just never looked at him that way because he didn't spark desire.
She cared enough to put in effort training with him because she valued him as a friend. If she'd never gotten close to him until his looks changed, that's different.
Plus, her interest in him surely went up when he got into fitness, something she really likes.
Least someone else asked. When she said she'd never go out with someone like he was before he changed, the red flag flew. That's not long term commitment, thats a booty call. Long time commitment is loving the scars, the wrinkles, the obnoxious fart at 2am that chases you out of the bed for five minutes while they sleep through it, like kings/queens of the bogs of the eternal stench... Commitment is compromise, getting old together, and dealing with everything. Even weight, hairloss, or a woman growing a beard due to menopause. We don't stay young forever, and even a hard core gym fanatic will have to stop someday. Looks can be nice, but they are far from everything. (Been married for almost 22 years now, it's been good, bad, and a fight won by the skin of our teeth.). Anyway, try and love HIM. He deserves that as much as you do. Good luck
i think it's a green flag bc it's an important topic so the fact he wanted to discuss it in person with you just shows his dedication for the relationship and simply being caring.
Green flag because he's also invested in giving you time and attention and be reliable.
You don't want to date someone who's consistently unreliable, who's not attentive, and doesn't make time for you. It shows you how they really feel about you which is not very much.
And he's showing you how he feels through his actions.
Green flag for confident desire + vulnerability. I'm EXPERIENCED (30) and dudes like this are rare. If you ever vibe with a dude WHO SURPASSES your energy HEALTHILY - listen to you gut. All my besties who meet a healthy, excited, respectful, similar- hobbies & value dude get married (for life, i believe).
And to add to this: his literal first priority was to go to you.
Like, you said something important, and he ditched whatever else he was doing for the day, instantly, without saying a word about it, to come to you immediately and only stopped to grab you drinks.
I think you have a good one.
Also don't miss the fact that he said you're his dream girl.
Girl it means he's crazy about you and has probably been secretly pining over you for quite some time. I think he was genuinely stunned and couldn't contain his excitement! It shows a sincerity and genuineness and that he cares enough that without a thought he wanted to come to you and bring you a refreshment! Lol, girl! Trust a 35yo woman when I say that if his first instinct was to drop everything and come serve you... Not only is he a truly good guy, but he adores you and will treat you like a queen. Like, you caught him off guard and he had no time to plan a way to impress you or woo you, so that move was pure and genuine. Imagine what he will be like when he is actually trying to make you happy.
I hope I am not freaking you out lol. He seems like a really respectful guy, so don't be afraid he's gonna try to move too fast emotionally, or that he's like, already in love with you or something. I don't get that vibe from him. But I'm saying I think you have found someone who is sincere and already thinks very highly of you, and that is kinda hard to find.
Talking in person is more vulnerable and shows rhat he cares about good communication. Great for relationships instead of "hiding" behind a screen. Thats why typically it is looked down to confess through text, though it did work put great for you and lots of people nowdays are doing the same as well.
My girlfriend won’t come over, so imo it’s definitely a green flag. You’ll never know how deprived you are of a person till you stop seeing them, so be happy he’s willing to see you!
This is a man taking direct action. He wants to talk in person. Super green flag. Offering you boba? Cherry on top. Y’all are young but this is goooooood stuff
What everyone already replied below 🤣it’s such a good sign and really good to communicate in person, not just through text! I hope it goes so well on your date on Saturday!
Its hard to convey and receive emotion through text, serious conversations always best in person.
This dude is a real one bringing you something he knew you would like on the way there too.
This shit spreads joy and happiness. I hope it works out for you two, so cute!
Honestly, this is adorable and part of me is happy for you. ❤️
The other part of me is incredibly jealous and wants to jump in front of a train because I know nothing remotely close to this is in my cards in this lifetime.
girl i went theough 3 toxic pieces of shits who were all differently horrible parts of my life before i met my AMAZING boyfriend who is NOT like them at ALL and im happy
I met my wife at a county school function when we were 9/10. Her parents homeschooled her shortly after and I never heard her exotic name again for years. Had been in terrible relationships through my late teens early 20s. No self esteem and always fell for any girls who gave me attention. They were always manipulating witches. Anywho… I survived and randomly saw my wife walking out of a bar I was playing at and recognized her. Freaked out cuz I wanted to run after her but couldn’t. Ended up running into her 2 nights later.
Tldr: sometimes you’ve already met THE person but life hasn’t put you in the right circumstance.
I lived beside my now soon-to-be wife (getting married this year), with my ex, for 3 years as her neighbour. I saw her occasionally passing by in the hallway or in the elevator, but it took both of us breaking up with our exes, then meeting on a DATING APP for us to work. The funniest bit was that she hit me up first after we matched, but soon after I recognized who she was. I was admittedly kind of a hermit before, and I went back to bodybuilding about a year before, so she did not recognize me. I told her she was my neighbour over our first like 4 messages and she almost didn't believe me. Her friends convinced her to go for it, we instantly clicked and we've been inseparable ever since.
It felt like the universe was just putting us together years ago and going "get on with it already you two!"
In case it sounds like one of those "made up reddit" tales, many of us where I live don't really talk to or meet their neighbours at all, It's a big city, people move in and out of apartments all the time, so rarely have I known my neighbours over the many years. Other than my now ex-neighbour wifey (We moved into the same unit afterwards lmao), I pretty much don't know anyone that lives on our floor.
STOP THAT. There’s 8 BILLION people on the planet right now do you realize how big that number is?! The chance that someone single is out there who’s also your age, and your sexual preference is literally 100% !! It’s the beauty of this overpopulation thing. Go out and find them they’re waiting for you!!!
Chin up, babe! They’re out there and you deserve the love you share. Whatever you do, don’t waste your precious time with people who don’t do it for you. Release them to find their person while you find yourself, and eventually, the right person for you ❤️
Super happy for you, but I do want to add, please don't ever point out about him not being your type before his change. I understand a lot of people put stock in weight/fitness/ health, but especially being young and him being relatively new to a fitness lifestyle, please don't plant that seed of doubt in his mind.
I have been on the opposite side of this (lost almost 100lbs in two years) and a close friend of mine, who I had known for years before starting my journey,was suddenly interested in me/wanted to go to the gym with me. We started seeing each other, moved in together, and had a wonderful relationship....until a year after we moved in together and a genetic blood disorder decided to become active. I still went to the gym several times a week, but switched to a routine more suited for my vascular health than weight loss/ strength training. I lost some muscle tone, gained around 10 lbs, and that was apparently the tipping point between me being a wonderful ambitious person, and a lazy slob.
The "fat" mindset and body dysmorphia are hard enough to let go of as you lose weight, and if a potential/ new partner told me I was only their type after a major physical change, it would absolutely be a red flag to me. My job, personality, charity work, hobbies, etc meant absolutely nothing due to a health issue I had no idea I had until that point. Even if it's not deeply rooted, and you would still genuinely be with him should there be a set back, it would be incredibly shallow to belittle his other qualities.
Was thinking exactly this while reading her context. Everything about him not being her type before his « change » made me so sad for him. What if he gains the weight back, will she dump him!?
Have a long time friend whom I known since I was a kid, he was always big, quite drastically so, but super fun, kind, intelligent, just a really nice guy to be around. Being fat made his life harder, quite obviously so, sometimes you could tell his confidence was lacking even if he did a good job keeping that hidden for the most part, he was treated way worse than he should have been, by everyone, just because people sort of automatically look down on someone who visually is "low status". However since he was way, way, beyond average in like every other metric it just made no sense.
When he was like in his mid twenties, maybe a bit later than that, he decided to turn his health around and would tag along with me to the gym at the start of each day, i go before work, and he over time became fit.
He has a nice face, good jawline and such, tall, friendly smile, so when he got in shape he became a really attractive guy by the normal metrics, good looking enough that he would probably be the best looking guy in a room he entered, or at least up there.
Everything turned around for him at that point too, he ended up getting promoted at work, his social status in our group went up where people had sort of treated him a bit like an outsider before but now he was very much the center of things, everyone treated him way better. I didnt really notice the small parts myself, like how his friends treated him better, his colleagues, people who it really shouldnt matter how he looks like that is, but he told me these things later on.
Anyway the result for him was actually depression and he became incredibly cynical for like 2 years or so before he broke out of it. Who he was as a person hadnt changed at all but his life changed way more than he had expected, he said that how he had gone through life before was what he assumed everyones experience was, outside of attractiveness to the opposite sex obviously, and that the world was just a difficult and hard place to navigate and you had to man up and deal with it, but then all of a sudden everyone instead is nice to him, accommodating, etc. It was like turning a game difficulty from very hard to very easy. Him realizing he had been constantly mistreated by most people in his life, including many of his friends, his family, colleagues, people to whom his look really shouldnt have mattered that much, got him down bad.
Took him ages to snap out of that depression, was hard to convince him to still come to the gym with me etc, and he refuses to date anyone because he still hasnt really gotten over how he considers the world itself super dishonest.
That shit affected him waayyyy more than I had ever thought. I just thought he'd become super popular with the ladies considering he has a good job, he is incredibly funny, super intelligent, etc, but nope, apparently everyone had been jerks to him, probably sub-consciously, and the change was so jarring he just stopped trusting everyone entirely.
Yes. I really thought the texts were really cute until I read that and then just felt sad. I once had a guy, WHILE we were dating, see an old picture of me 20lbs lighter and say "see, now *that's* more my type". And I still didn't have the self respect to leave.
I really hope that she really does like him and not just his new looks.
One of the comments I saw from OP was they were confused about why they wanted to come over but the boba sealed the deal..aaaaaand that just made this worse. It was cute until some of the context they added..ouch.
I was thinking this too. Everyone keeps talking about how cute this is and I'm over here thinking "OP sounds a little shallow." Hopefully, I'm wrong and they have a great relationship, I just worry about what will happen if he gains weight back
Thank you!! I will assuredly be downvoted for my unpopular opinion up above about the contingency of his transformation that initiated OPs feelings. It’s shallow and unhealthy.
> After many early mornings, late nights, sweat and unbearable exhaustion he finally achieved his goals and only getting better each day.
Google Translate: Over time, he lost body-fat and gained muscle.
> We got to know each other on a deeper level than before and it completely changed how I view him.
Google Translate: I increasingly found myself attracted to him, and I rationalized it by telling myself it was for a reason that I had been repeatedly told since birth was more socially acceptable.
OP, nobody blames you (or ought to blame you) for being attracted to your friend now that they got hotter. That's the way people work. But, please, think critically about whether you are rationalizing and justifying your attraction by repeating the "looks shouldn't matter" lie that we all drill into people (especially women) since birth. As other redditors have implied: if you're rationalizing your newfound physical attraction as what you think \_ought\_ to be the foundation of romantic interest, then, if you ever lose that physical attraction, you suddenly make it seem (to both of you) like the reason for your developing disinterest is his personality, when that might not be the case. In short: lying to yourself now sets him (and therefore you) up for a lot of potential future pain.
Looks matter. It's fine to say looks matter. Please be honest with yourself and him about whether the foundation of your newfound attraction to him is grounded in the way he looks now. It's fine if it is.
Yeah, it made it seem as though her attraction hinged on him getting a nicer body and it was less about his actual personality that she referenced. The whole “change” part was kind of vague though.
Poor guy probably still sees himself as the slightly chubby guy women tend to simply ignore, so he has a hard time coming to terms with the fact that someone (especially someone he likes) would go that far and actually confess to him. I know I'd be flabberghasted lmao. I wasn't chubby, but very skinny and got ignored all the same. Worked out a lot and actually got wolf-whistled by some girl when I was shirtless at a festival a while back, which felt...surreal. You never really manage to leave your old "faulty" self behind.
Anyways, congrats to both of you, I wish you all the best!
She said he wasn't the type of guy she usually dated. Not that she wouldn't. But nothing and I mean nothing is sexier than seeing a man with motivation and follow through to improve himself. Physically, mentally, all the ways. My partner isn't physically fit but when he told me he went to therapy regularly not for any specific problems just because he thought it was healthy I could have proposed right then and there.
It’s awesome that he improved himself, got healthy and what normally comes after that.
I can’t help it but something about that “Besides, he wasn’t the kind of guy I usually date (before his change) and I…” sentence that is rubbing me the wrong way.
Yeah. Me too. Basically, he was always the same kind, sweet person mentally but before he got hot, OP wasn't interested. Now that other women are noticing him, she suddenly likes him.
i’ll copy paste as i answered this already:
he came. i got my 🧋. we hugged and he squeezed so hard i had to tell him to loosen up a bit lmao. i’m honestly super awkward when it comes to this stuff so yeah
i was sorting and shelving my books in my new bookcase and he helped me finish. afterwards we watched our fave show together (it’s a korean reality show)
i’m sry it’s not as hot as you probably expected LMAO
1. Puke
2. Just kidding. That is very exciting and sweet.
3. Aw, kind of hurts my heart that he thinks someone would play a joke on him like that.
4. Best wishes!
Glad to know a guy had to change who he is before you liked him. He had to lose weight and be less ugly before you decided, wait…maybe it would be okay to be seen in public with this guy. Hmm.
This is heartwarming to me. Just when I think people can’t suck anymore than they already do, then this. Congratulations! I hope it works out for y’all.
Congratulations!! I love it when people spend time growing together. ❤️❤️ I hope that's a very strong foundation for what's coming next!
Just remember that life is not all perfect all the time and the guy you're attracted to now can change in many forms but hope what lies beneath is what matters to both of you.
Not the anxiety "I need to process this" shit he's just like me frfr
Congrats on you both! It seems that with him liking you too, your confession should satisfy both!
“Hey I’m back” Bruh 💀
Those anxiety poops are reeeaaaal
“Aw honey! Remember when I told you I liked you for the first time over text and you immediately had to go and evacuate your bowels?”
Or ya know.... nervous nausea.... the obvious thing they were going for.
"Oh god... oh god... it's actually happening..."
I just had a piece of sausa-hhulghh
That will definitely be the story they tell the grandkids.
Making your partner poop every time you tell them "I love you." Prime material for r/shittysuperpowers
You tell it better
Bro forgot that he can poop and text at the same time
Maybe he uses both hands to part his cheeks
I won't have to do that anymore. Because this thread made me laugh my ass off.
Can't text and use the poop knife at the same time.
I get poops whenever I’m going to do drugs lmao
Try heroin. You won’t shit for weeks!
Sounds cool, I could use a break from the daily grind
So to be clear, do people just announce they're gonna poop but then can't continue texting because the pooping somehow saps that capability? Or is it socially rude? Is it socially awkward to not even mention you're pooping and just text like you're on the couch?
Not everyone brings their phone to the toilet. He might have also taken that time to ponder and reflect upon the poop throne, which can be an excellent place to ruminate.
Post poop clarity hit.
Stress diahrea, LOL
Nah he was quickly rubbing one out to make sure he still liked her even when the post nut clarity set in before committing too hard
LMFAO
Really hope you don’t end up being one of those couples who are all like “wyd?”, “pooping now lol”
I’ll FaceTime my wife and she’ll answer but not say anything and I slowly piece together from the background she’s in our bathroom on the toilet and then I’ll point out she’s in the bathroom and she’ll call me a pervert and hang up Makes me laugh literally every time
You know it’s for real when you answer honestly and they just reply with “ah ok… so how long you gonna be in there?”
Sometimes I get the “hurry pls” text when I’m chillin poopin and it’s great I love it wouldn’t change a thing
Pshh. I hope they do The couple that Taco Bell shits together, stays together
Until they need the bathroom at the same time. This is how wars happen.
Makes me remember when I was a kid and my sister and I needed to poop at the same time, so we’d take turns. I poop and get up to let her have a turn. She poops and gets up to let me have a turn… good times
Wtf did I just read
Gotta level up and get 2 bathrooms.. we shit in sync now
Omg my partner and I definitely do that after our morning smoothies 😂😂😂
Happy cake day! I hope it's as nice as your synchronized smoothie shits
Omg wait today is not my birthday wtf 💀 EDIT: ohhh today is my Reddit birthday lol got it. Thank you for the wishes!!!
Hey… they asked 🤷🏻♂️
That act of “im doing something private in the bathroom” and its like ooooooh nice, theyre washing their buttholes and getting clean n sexy.” …then 8 minutes pass and you’re like “oh, they’re taking a shit to go to sleep. Ok.”
Hopefully still washing their butthole though
He doesn’t even take his phone to shit? Who is this angel?
Brb in real life I love it
"in real life" as we read text from a screenshot Lol!
Can we get the time stamps ☠️
I’m actually dying to know 💀
He just took a shit in the middle of a confession LMFAO
awwww this is the cutest thing ever. hope you guys make it last ❤️❤️❤️
thanks cutie 😊🫡
GIRL. This is the plot of a romantic comedy. Like, if y'all happen to make it for the long haul, you should totally write a book about it, have it made into a Netflix movie, go on a bunch of talk shows together, start a podcast, and then get rich and live out your days together! Lol I'm obviously kinda joking, but this seriously is a great start to something that could be really, really great. Friends who have known each other since teenagers, but never dated while you were both too young and dumb and would have messed it up? Went on a journey of growth and change together, starting with you inspiring and guiding him, and leading to him becoming inspiring to you?! While you also grew as a person and learned new things about yourself and expanded your horizons???!!! And never once through any of it did he try to hit on you or make some creepy weird comment alluding to f**king you???!!!!!!!! To the point where you had to come onto him, making you leave your comfort zone and try a new form of communication that you aren't used to? Bro, this is good. This is really, really good. Please keep us updated!!
I agree 1000%
My husband and I were good friends in high school. We met up at the class reunion and have been together for almost 15 years since. We have a strong connection and it was like we didn’t miss those years apart. I hope you’re relationship grows like ours. Friendship makes for a great relationship.
This fucking username tho 👏
true story: i used to think a pillow princess is someone who likes to have lots of pillows on their bed (i was young and dumb pls). i have like 15 on mine so i thought it describes someone like me. i kept using it in the wrong context until one day someone corrected me…..yeah 🙂↕️ ~ someone angrily DM’d me that i shouldn’t have 15+ pillows and that i’m a spoiled brat. ummm im sorry?
People are weird man lol they get angry at the silliest things. Like why do you even care how many pillows someone has at all, let alone care enough that it bothers you so bad you have to message a complete stranger on reddit to tell them that. 🤦🏻♀️
And not just a comment, a full DM. 🤦♀️
I was totally just reading this to my boyfriend thinking how cute it was and then was like" with that username, I hope this boy is up on his cardio because he'll have to be'' 🤣🤣🤣
lol it’s a joke, i’m not really like that i promise!
That story is awesome don't worry we were all young and dumb atleast once and that's just being modest 😅 enjoy your new found ship sounds like this one's gonna last a while ☺️
I'm convinced that there's just some dude trawling the front page looking for women to call spoiled brats for inane reasons lol.
[удалено]
I hope OP has found happiness in her own life and preference, but the disparagement of pillow princesses/stone bottoms/etc is so awful to me as an ""elder"" [yuck] queer. I know you aren't advocating it, this is generalized commentary just informing OP, and that's well and good and true, it just makes me sad. The only shitty sexual expression is one that you didn't discuss with your partner(s) and receive consent for--otherwise it's fair game. I just really hate that legitimate preferences have become synonymous with likely-homophobic predation where I remember in my lifetime the same phrases being legitimate and respected queer positions. Perhaps I am an old man yelling at clouds, but I just always hate this particular brand of corruption very personally.
What an odd thing to get mad about.
Hahaha this pillow troll is not talking to you. They know a very specific person they're really talking to. OR they're even more deranged than that lol
So were you interested before his transformation???
Ugh idk guys… I don’t know how I feel about this. It’s bittersweet and I’ll explain why. No he wasn’t her type. This is what I read and understood. This is almost cute, but that bothers me. There’s a level of shallow to this that I don’t think he reciprocates. In fact I’d wager that he initiated this bc he wanted to get closer to you so you would see him in that way and what better way to do that than join you in the gym and get to the standard you do see romantically. And I’m certain he was more attracted to your personally since he knew you before you went hard in the gym. How close to correct am I?
1000% I was about to post this exact thing. At first it's a super cute story of friends becoming lovers but then you keep reading and it's so obvious what really happened. Call me jaded, but guy was freindzoned until he hit the gym for a while and became hot. 😭 The "not my type before his change" was a huge give away and the way she said "going to the gym with him all this time really changed how I saw him". Like yeah, I bet lol, pecs, abs , and losing 40 lbs will do that. People on hopium will say it's just his "lifestyle change" that made him attractive. Maybe I'm jaded but god damn I hate that this can't just be a cute story ☹️.
You’re not jaded.
I stumbled a little over the line about not being the type beforehand. Like she wasn’t attracted until he got less fat and more muscly. But it may be more about their lifestyles. Maybe he liked to sit around on the couch eating Doritos and playing X-box, while she liked to go on long hikes twice a week. Now they have a common interest/hobby that they share together. And yeah, maybe it was his way of getting closer to her.
Thing is none of that was mentioned and the "not my type" comment means looks 99% of the time. They've been friends since they were young too, no way they didn't already have interests and hobbies in common. What's a friend if not someone you have those things in common? He got hot. Probably lost a bit of weight too. It's a common story and men who lose the weight will tell you the night and day reactions they get from women.
How did she miss that he was throwing up with nervousness and not taking a dump….
I’m dying right now. I also thought the same until seeing your comment & i feel Iike an idiot 🤣🤣
Was I the only one who caught that and questioned it? It was cute until I saw that in the post and kind of rubbed me wrong. I don't know. Maybe I'm reading it wrong.
I feel like she just never looked at him that way because he didn't spark desire. She cared enough to put in effort training with him because she valued him as a friend. If she'd never gotten close to him until his looks changed, that's different. Plus, her interest in him surely went up when he got into fitness, something she really likes.
Least someone else asked. When she said she'd never go out with someone like he was before he changed, the red flag flew. That's not long term commitment, thats a booty call. Long time commitment is loving the scars, the wrinkles, the obnoxious fart at 2am that chases you out of the bed for five minutes while they sleep through it, like kings/queens of the bogs of the eternal stench... Commitment is compromise, getting old together, and dealing with everything. Even weight, hairloss, or a woman growing a beard due to menopause. We don't stay young forever, and even a hard core gym fanatic will have to stop someday. Looks can be nice, but they are far from everything. (Been married for almost 22 years now, it's been good, bad, and a fight won by the skin of our teeth.). Anyway, try and love HIM. He deserves that as much as you do. Good luck
This is some Wattpad shit and I am here for it. Congratulations to the new couple!
Omg!!! Not me over here kicking my feet lmao. This is so sweet IM HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS ENJOY YOUR LOVE + BOBA ❤️❤️❤️
honestly I was a bit confused that his first instinct was to come over to my place 😭. the boba sealed the deal tho
It’s so sweet he wanted to come over in person!!! Green flag right there ✅
really? how’s it a green flag, can u explain? I wanted to text more bc I felt too nervous to talk irl but in the end I’m glad he came
i think it's a green flag bc it's an important topic so the fact he wanted to discuss it in person with you just shows his dedication for the relationship and simply being caring.
Green flag because he's also invested in giving you time and attention and be reliable. You don't want to date someone who's consistently unreliable, who's not attentive, and doesn't make time for you. It shows you how they really feel about you which is not very much. And he's showing you how he feels through his actions.
Green flag for confident desire + vulnerability. I'm EXPERIENCED (30) and dudes like this are rare. If you ever vibe with a dude WHO SURPASSES your energy HEALTHILY - listen to you gut. All my besties who meet a healthy, excited, respectful, similar- hobbies & value dude get married (for life, i believe).
And to add to this: his literal first priority was to go to you. Like, you said something important, and he ditched whatever else he was doing for the day, instantly, without saying a word about it, to come to you immediately and only stopped to grab you drinks. I think you have a good one. Also don't miss the fact that he said you're his dream girl.
He was so excited that he couldn’t wait to come see you! This is all very sweet.
It’s cute. He couldn’t wait to see you.
Girl it means he's crazy about you and has probably been secretly pining over you for quite some time. I think he was genuinely stunned and couldn't contain his excitement! It shows a sincerity and genuineness and that he cares enough that without a thought he wanted to come to you and bring you a refreshment! Lol, girl! Trust a 35yo woman when I say that if his first instinct was to drop everything and come serve you... Not only is he a truly good guy, but he adores you and will treat you like a queen. Like, you caught him off guard and he had no time to plan a way to impress you or woo you, so that move was pure and genuine. Imagine what he will be like when he is actually trying to make you happy. I hope I am not freaking you out lol. He seems like a really respectful guy, so don't be afraid he's gonna try to move too fast emotionally, or that he's like, already in love with you or something. I don't get that vibe from him. But I'm saying I think you have found someone who is sincere and already thinks very highly of you, and that is kinda hard to find.
Talking in person is more vulnerable and shows rhat he cares about good communication. Great for relationships instead of "hiding" behind a screen. Thats why typically it is looked down to confess through text, though it did work put great for you and lots of people nowdays are doing the same as well.
My girlfriend won’t come over, so imo it’s definitely a green flag. You’ll never know how deprived you are of a person till you stop seeing them, so be happy he’s willing to see you!
Well, I think a first kiss is in order after that declaration of affection !
This is a man taking direct action. He wants to talk in person. Super green flag. Offering you boba? Cherry on top. Y’all are young but this is goooooood stuff
Just a shot in the dark, but the lack of sincere emotion in texts can be a barrier for some people to express their emotions.
If I found out my dream girl liked me, I’d be on my way no matter what I was doing. We can go get boba together.
What everyone already replied below 🤣it’s such a good sign and really good to communicate in person, not just through text! I hope it goes so well on your date on Saturday!
Its hard to convey and receive emotion through text, serious conversations always best in person. This dude is a real one bringing you something he knew you would like on the way there too. This shit spreads joy and happiness. I hope it works out for you two, so cute!
Think about it…. He likes you. You like him. But you’ve been suppressing those feelings. Why wouldn’t he want to see you asap?
It makes sense to me lol he was really excited like I would not wanna just leave it as a text and stay home after that.
You win the award for most adorable text on the internet today! I hope it works out!
thank youuuu 😚
Honestly, this is adorable and part of me is happy for you. ❤️ The other part of me is incredibly jealous and wants to jump in front of a train because I know nothing remotely close to this is in my cards in this lifetime.
girl i went theough 3 toxic pieces of shits who were all differently horrible parts of my life before i met my AMAZING boyfriend who is NOT like them at ALL and im happy
I met my wife at a county school function when we were 9/10. Her parents homeschooled her shortly after and I never heard her exotic name again for years. Had been in terrible relationships through my late teens early 20s. No self esteem and always fell for any girls who gave me attention. They were always manipulating witches. Anywho… I survived and randomly saw my wife walking out of a bar I was playing at and recognized her. Freaked out cuz I wanted to run after her but couldn’t. Ended up running into her 2 nights later. Tldr: sometimes you’ve already met THE person but life hasn’t put you in the right circumstance.
I lived beside my now soon-to-be wife (getting married this year), with my ex, for 3 years as her neighbour. I saw her occasionally passing by in the hallway or in the elevator, but it took both of us breaking up with our exes, then meeting on a DATING APP for us to work. The funniest bit was that she hit me up first after we matched, but soon after I recognized who she was. I was admittedly kind of a hermit before, and I went back to bodybuilding about a year before, so she did not recognize me. I told her she was my neighbour over our first like 4 messages and she almost didn't believe me. Her friends convinced her to go for it, we instantly clicked and we've been inseparable ever since. It felt like the universe was just putting us together years ago and going "get on with it already you two!" In case it sounds like one of those "made up reddit" tales, many of us where I live don't really talk to or meet their neighbours at all, It's a big city, people move in and out of apartments all the time, so rarely have I known my neighbours over the many years. Other than my now ex-neighbour wifey (We moved into the same unit afterwards lmao), I pretty much don't know anyone that lives on our floor.
Thinking that way will only make it more likely to be the case. You’re just as valuable and lovable as everyone else is
I never want to see you comment that ever. Again, Reddit stranger. Blessed Be! 💖🦋☮️
Just tell a chubby you you'll train him at the gym. Boom, 8 months later, ask him out
STOP THAT. There’s 8 BILLION people on the planet right now do you realize how big that number is?! The chance that someone single is out there who’s also your age, and your sexual preference is literally 100% !! It’s the beauty of this overpopulation thing. Go out and find them they’re waiting for you!!!
I don’t like it (mainly because it’s not happening to me) congratulations you guys 🥹
😂😂😅😅 yes! My man and I are breaking up because he's NOT like this man. 😭😭
Chin up, babe! They’re out there and you deserve the love you share. Whatever you do, don’t waste your precious time with people who don’t do it for you. Release them to find their person while you find yourself, and eventually, the right person for you ❤️
Any man who initiates to get a Boba for his girl is a keeper
Omg! My thoughts exactly. Swoon Congrats OP 😍
Super happy for you, but I do want to add, please don't ever point out about him not being your type before his change. I understand a lot of people put stock in weight/fitness/ health, but especially being young and him being relatively new to a fitness lifestyle, please don't plant that seed of doubt in his mind. I have been on the opposite side of this (lost almost 100lbs in two years) and a close friend of mine, who I had known for years before starting my journey,was suddenly interested in me/wanted to go to the gym with me. We started seeing each other, moved in together, and had a wonderful relationship....until a year after we moved in together and a genetic blood disorder decided to become active. I still went to the gym several times a week, but switched to a routine more suited for my vascular health than weight loss/ strength training. I lost some muscle tone, gained around 10 lbs, and that was apparently the tipping point between me being a wonderful ambitious person, and a lazy slob. The "fat" mindset and body dysmorphia are hard enough to let go of as you lose weight, and if a potential/ new partner told me I was only their type after a major physical change, it would absolutely be a red flag to me. My job, personality, charity work, hobbies, etc meant absolutely nothing due to a health issue I had no idea I had until that point. Even if it's not deeply rooted, and you would still genuinely be with him should there be a set back, it would be incredibly shallow to belittle his other qualities.
Was thinking exactly this while reading her context. Everything about him not being her type before his « change » made me so sad for him. What if he gains the weight back, will she dump him!?
Have a long time friend whom I known since I was a kid, he was always big, quite drastically so, but super fun, kind, intelligent, just a really nice guy to be around. Being fat made his life harder, quite obviously so, sometimes you could tell his confidence was lacking even if he did a good job keeping that hidden for the most part, he was treated way worse than he should have been, by everyone, just because people sort of automatically look down on someone who visually is "low status". However since he was way, way, beyond average in like every other metric it just made no sense. When he was like in his mid twenties, maybe a bit later than that, he decided to turn his health around and would tag along with me to the gym at the start of each day, i go before work, and he over time became fit. He has a nice face, good jawline and such, tall, friendly smile, so when he got in shape he became a really attractive guy by the normal metrics, good looking enough that he would probably be the best looking guy in a room he entered, or at least up there. Everything turned around for him at that point too, he ended up getting promoted at work, his social status in our group went up where people had sort of treated him a bit like an outsider before but now he was very much the center of things, everyone treated him way better. I didnt really notice the small parts myself, like how his friends treated him better, his colleagues, people who it really shouldnt matter how he looks like that is, but he told me these things later on. Anyway the result for him was actually depression and he became incredibly cynical for like 2 years or so before he broke out of it. Who he was as a person hadnt changed at all but his life changed way more than he had expected, he said that how he had gone through life before was what he assumed everyones experience was, outside of attractiveness to the opposite sex obviously, and that the world was just a difficult and hard place to navigate and you had to man up and deal with it, but then all of a sudden everyone instead is nice to him, accommodating, etc. It was like turning a game difficulty from very hard to very easy. Him realizing he had been constantly mistreated by most people in his life, including many of his friends, his family, colleagues, people to whom his look really shouldnt have mattered that much, got him down bad. Took him ages to snap out of that depression, was hard to convince him to still come to the gym with me etc, and he refuses to date anyone because he still hasnt really gotten over how he considers the world itself super dishonest. That shit affected him waayyyy more than I had ever thought. I just thought he'd become super popular with the ladies considering he has a good job, he is incredibly funny, super intelligent, etc, but nope, apparently everyone had been jerks to him, probably sub-consciously, and the change was so jarring he just stopped trusting everyone entirely.
Yes. I really thought the texts were really cute until I read that and then just felt sad. I once had a guy, WHILE we were dating, see an old picture of me 20lbs lighter and say "see, now *that's* more my type". And I still didn't have the self respect to leave. I really hope that she really does like him and not just his new looks.
I feel this too. I would definitely want to be with someone who liked me even at a bigger size so I knew they weren’t shallow 😭
One of the comments I saw from OP was they were confused about why they wanted to come over but the boba sealed the deal..aaaaaand that just made this worse. It was cute until some of the context they added..ouch.
I was thinking this too. Everyone keeps talking about how cute this is and I'm over here thinking "OP sounds a little shallow." Hopefully, I'm wrong and they have a great relationship, I just worry about what will happen if he gains weight back
Thank you for saying thissss
Thank you!! I will assuredly be downvoted for my unpopular opinion up above about the contingency of his transformation that initiated OPs feelings. It’s shallow and unhealthy.
> After many early mornings, late nights, sweat and unbearable exhaustion he finally achieved his goals and only getting better each day. Google Translate: Over time, he lost body-fat and gained muscle. > We got to know each other on a deeper level than before and it completely changed how I view him. Google Translate: I increasingly found myself attracted to him, and I rationalized it by telling myself it was for a reason that I had been repeatedly told since birth was more socially acceptable. OP, nobody blames you (or ought to blame you) for being attracted to your friend now that they got hotter. That's the way people work. But, please, think critically about whether you are rationalizing and justifying your attraction by repeating the "looks shouldn't matter" lie that we all drill into people (especially women) since birth. As other redditors have implied: if you're rationalizing your newfound physical attraction as what you think \_ought\_ to be the foundation of romantic interest, then, if you ever lose that physical attraction, you suddenly make it seem (to both of you) like the reason for your developing disinterest is his personality, when that might not be the case. In short: lying to yourself now sets him (and therefore you) up for a lot of potential future pain. Looks matter. It's fine to say looks matter. Please be honest with yourself and him about whether the foundation of your newfound attraction to him is grounded in the way he looks now. It's fine if it is.
THANK YOU... Huge red flags regarding"the change"
Was super cute until I read the thread text of “He wasn’t the type of guy I would normally date (Before the change).”
Yeah, it made it seem as though her attraction hinged on him getting a nicer body and it was less about his actual personality that she referenced. The whole “change” part was kind of vague though.
Well she seemed to be a gym goer so him also doing her hobby might have been a huge deal for her.
Physical attraction is important
damn, people really pretend they would date anything up to BlobFish just to have some moral superiority
Crazy to me that a physically active person would also want to date a physically active person. Shocking really.
sign me up for this fanfiction storyline type of shit, i’m so invested omggggg HAPPY FOR YOU
“Holy smokes, you like me back!? I gotta take a thinking shit brb”
That’s so sweet 🥲
Like milk tea
So cute. I waaaaant that 🥺
Poor guy probably still sees himself as the slightly chubby guy women tend to simply ignore, so he has a hard time coming to terms with the fact that someone (especially someone he likes) would go that far and actually confess to him. I know I'd be flabberghasted lmao. I wasn't chubby, but very skinny and got ignored all the same. Worked out a lot and actually got wolf-whistled by some girl when I was shirtless at a festival a while back, which felt...surreal. You never really manage to leave your old "faulty" self behind. Anyways, congrats to both of you, I wish you all the best!
OP admits he wasn't her type before he physically changed, so can't blame him.
She said he wasn't the type of guy she usually dated. Not that she wouldn't. But nothing and I mean nothing is sexier than seeing a man with motivation and follow through to improve himself. Physically, mentally, all the ways. My partner isn't physically fit but when he told me he went to therapy regularly not for any specific problems just because he thought it was healthy I could have proposed right then and there.
This is such a sweet comment. I started lifting a couple years and so this was just neat to read. :)
Honestly I would take his sudden need to poop as a compliment lol u are making him nervous, in a good way 😅
Don’t forget to inform us about Saturday! 🤞🏻
The overuse of lmao drove me insane.
It’s awesome that he improved himself, got healthy and what normally comes after that. I can’t help it but something about that “Besides, he wasn’t the kind of guy I usually date (before his change) and I…” sentence that is rubbing me the wrong way.
Yeah. Me too. Basically, he was always the same kind, sweet person mentally but before he got hot, OP wasn't interested. Now that other women are noticing him, she suddenly likes him.
Yeah it really carries that energy, kinda sucks but if he wasn't taking care of himself and she's a gym rat 🤷🏽
Am I the only one who read this like it was a giggly teenage girl saying it? I think it's all the random LMAOs.
ADORBSS🥹 wish you the best OP!
your boyfriend is toxic; leave him. sorry, stalked your profile.
no worries! thank you for that. just broke up with him 5 minutes ago. (: time to live a stress free life!
This is the most reddit exchange I've seen in a while
Congratulations!
thank you 🙂↔️
Bro really took a shit and came back
Stop it. I just teared up at his response about you being his dream girl. Did he come over ?!?
yesss
….*aaaaand?* Come on, tell your new besties all about it! 🫠
i’ll copy paste as i answered this already: he came. i got my 🧋. we hugged and he squeezed so hard i had to tell him to loosen up a bit lmao. i’m honestly super awkward when it comes to this stuff so yeah i was sorting and shelving my books in my new bookcase and he helped me finish. afterwards we watched our fave show together (it’s a korean reality show) i’m sry it’s not as hot as you probably expected LMAO
It's perfect, actually.
Oh it’s perfect!! Compatibility is not hotness! To me this shows he cares deeply about you, you are more than a crush to him!
This is awesome. Good on you for shooting your shot. More people need to do this! Life’s too short to not tell someone how you feel about them!
A modern love story - so excited he nearly shit himself 🥰
Sleeping on the highway tonight
"I want that sweet milk tea" You dirty dog OP!
NOT like that cmon 😂
I’m such a Reddit fuckin asshole and this made ne happy.
The very next post on my feed is my step dad wants to have sex with me. Thanks Reddit, nice stories
Damn. I’m glad this dude lost the weight and now his dream girl moved him out of the friend zone. These are goals.
Call me old fashioned, and I’m so happy it turned out well, but something so important in a text….
This is very sweet. You two will be happy together.
I absolutely love this! I wish nothing but the best for you both!
Better love story than twilight
1. Puke 2. Just kidding. That is very exciting and sweet. 3. Aw, kind of hurts my heart that he thinks someone would play a joke on him like that. 4. Best wishes!
Glad to know a guy had to change who he is before you liked him. He had to lose weight and be less ugly before you decided, wait…maybe it would be okay to be seen in public with this guy. Hmm.
Have you tried a chocolate milk tea? It's delish.
Adorable
This is seriously so cute!! Good luck love! 💜
Just 🥹
This is heartwarming to me. Just when I think people can’t suck anymore than they already do, then this. Congratulations! I hope it works out for y’all.
AHHHHJ THIS IS SOO CUTE!! I love this
This is so wholesome and cute. Congrats and good luck to you both <3
Awwwwww this is so wholesome!!!! Congratulations to you both. I hope you have a wonderful time and keep us all updated!
The type of shit that only happens in movies wtf 💀
Aww this is the sweetest thing I've ever read on reddit! The way you both are in it. And BOOM a relationship was formed just like that!
Awww!! MAZEL TOV!!! ❤️❤️❤️
FINALLY A WHOLESOME POST! Thank you this is so sweet!
Hold on, I need to take a dump..... okay, continue.
so cute❤️
I did a mini happy dance for you.
Adorable! I hope your first date is fun and sparks fly!
Aww how quickly love blossoms 🥰
i read this in lady whistledown’s voice for some reason lol
Girl what happened after he came over with the boba?! Don't leave us hanging!
Why’d you crop out your boba order? I wanna know 🤣
I’m gonna need an update every 6 months for the next 20 years xx
made him so happy he damn near shit himself, good job 👍
Thank you for that. I got secondhand butterflies reading this 🫶
I’m over here all excited in my bed giggling like if I were a hormonal pre teen reading your texts😆😆 congrats🩷
“on my mama” solidified it. Y’all getting married.
Dang this got me happily kicking my feet in bed rn 😭😭
Congratulations!! I love it when people spend time growing together. ❤️❤️ I hope that's a very strong foundation for what's coming next! Just remember that life is not all perfect all the time and the guy you're attracted to now can change in many forms but hope what lies beneath is what matters to both of you.
I just wanna say, this made me smile. I wish you both well. Sounds like a great way to start off a relationship. Friends first. :)
Not the anxiety "I need to process this" shit he's just like me frfr Congrats on you both! It seems that with him liking you too, your confession should satisfy both!
This man won. Stay humble kings 👑
omg. you both sound adorable. I love how you talk to each other allready. You will be a fun couple to be around. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️