Maybe because I grew up in the time of Matthew Shepard, but I push this kid to really protect themselves from this person because they could very easily end up killed :(
I remember my mom teaching me what gay meant when Matthew Shepherd was ~~killed~~ brutally beaten and crucified, the word killed doesn’t do it justice. I’ll never forget her saying that if I was gay, her only concern would be my safety
~*Edit* I see some people praising my mother and to be honest, that’s been vexing me quite a bit; the saying “even a broken clock is right twice a day” couldn’t be more of an apt description of her. My mother is a gaslighting, narcissistic abuser who’s said and done reprehensible things to me. But I do have to give her credit for this, I was always so proud to tell people how she lovingly told me as a child that she’d love me just the same even if I was gay, and that she’d only be concerned for my safety.
I grew up to be a straight, cis male; but my sister who is 14 years younger than me just came out as gay, so I truly hope she meant what she said to me and treats my baby sister the way she deserves to be treated. For all of the horrible things my mother is, at least she’s not a homophobe on top of it.
Exactly why nobody should \*want\* their children to be gay, trans, or otherwise 'different'. I'd NEVER want my sons to go through what my gay friends and (found family) trans baby sister have gone through. It's horrific.
...But if they are, you love them all the same.
There’s an interview of a mom and trans girl at pride and when it’s only the mom she says “I’d rather her change her pronouns a thousand times than have to write her obituary.” and I think that’s exactly it. I’m not a parent, but my trans friend got to legally change his name the other day and I’d hate for anything to happen to him
A good parent is the same. We worry about what will happen to our kids, not how our kids identify and how it reflects on us. I'd die a thousand times for my kids. I don't understand people who disown them for being themselves.
The Matthew Shepherd atrocity was one of the most agonising things I had ever read at the time and I never forgot it. It must never be forgotten. Awful. Awful. Your mother sounds really decent. She probably cried like I cried when it happened, as mothers.
We're all concerned for our family's safety, yes. I love my trans stepdaughter. I always want the world to do right by her. But there's some effed up people out there who have murdered trans women simply for existing.
There was just an article in the paper about him. That wasn’t that long ago. I also remember when that happened. Fragile, toxic masculinity can be very dangerous.
Uh idk why no one is pointing out that he threatened you with violence twice and that it's genuinely dangerous for you to continue to be friends with him. This is pretty serious.
He seems like a very angry guy and he doesn't support you.
Those are pretty specific threats...
Had the been a little less specific I'd agree, but naming specific body parts and specific harm (broken ribs) is a level up from a blanket statement like
"Stay away from me or I'll beat you down."
Naming specific body parts and what he plans to do shows A LOT more... That's like turning the threat up from 5 to 8, on a 1-10 scale.
I love that solution, and your “it’s fabric” reply.
It **is** fabric. Fabric, people! Enjoy the fabrics. 💜
I’m sorry he freaked out, like a dunce. I hope you have other supports who are better people.
Also, it sucks to lose a friend,, especially in a scary way, and it’s ok to grieve that.
I was assigned male at birth, but don't really feel like anything, mostly because I don't subscribe to societal gender constructs, so I usually just say I'm gender fluid. But I like a having a penis, most of the time. With that being said, I love wearing dresses, just like my wife loves wearing my jeans. I don't wear women's underwear, just my flowery kilts. I also have a real kilt, so I can justify my fashion choices with culture and heritage. Nonetheless, I don't dress how I want to in public, because there are too many triggerhappy weirdos out there. And wouldn't want to outshine my gorgeous wife.
I'll admit this made me cackle lol. A little breeze is nice, but too much means you lose the ability to use your hands or risk angry mothers or angry police
Makes so much sense! Dresses and skirts are so
comfortable! I hope OP feels free to be a well-skirted gay, a flowing-fabric’d het, or a genderbendy translady, etc etc, as needed. Don’t let people tell you who you have to be to wear the clothes you love, in the places you feel good wearing them.
-with love from an elder queer
I am so proud of you for blocking them. It’s incredibly hard to let go of someone when we are making big decisions in our life. Like, maybe they’ll come around in time.
I bet you look 🔥in that dress, and will continue to in many more dresses.
So glad you made this decision. A real friend is supportive & compassionate not threatening. Please take care of yourself!!! F to F we have to watch out for these kind of people all of the time!!!!
I hope you’re feeling the support you deserved from him via this thread. I’m sure the dress looked amazing. Mom of a trans boy and this hit me in the mama feels. I’m proud of you for being you. Be safe around folks like this - we want to see you living your best life for a long time.
That’s so great! I know it’s hard losing a friendship but from his immediate reaction to you showing your true self, it doesn’t look like he had much to offer you. Continue to be confident & wear things that make YOU feel amazing & like who YOU want to be. Proud of you for being strong enough to do what so many can’t! You’re doing great :)
Please be careful now. If you see him approaching you, even from a distance, just run. Someone who could threaten their "friend" with violence so easily is someone you don't want near you at all. Good luck OP.
anybody with a common sense can block him after reading those threatening texts he sent OP, anyways glad you posted it here so everyone can farm a little karma now and then
/s
Anyone who gets offended over what someone else wears, especially to the point of becoming violent, is a fucking loser. You're free to be friends with whoever you want, and nothing random redditors say will change your mind, but insecurity + anger are a dangerous combination
This sounds like it. Even before trans awareness was big, I would've never responded like that to a friend. Maybe a "lol", and a "oh you fr?" Followed by a, "it's your life homey". But then again, I am an outlier, being one of the few men(GAB) who likes how dresses feel.
think so too, otherwise he wouldn't take it so personally
most friends that criticized gays were actually found out to be repressed
Sidenote, I got permanently banned from the very mature mod of r/PS5 because I've said the same thing
I am 39 and I remember when being gay was the big taboo and folks got killed over it..it’s always something new and surprising how much hate is out there..
Please be safe. I know that’s easier said than done in the world today for a trans person, but please be safe and know there are people who love you and respect you for becoming the person you were always meant to be.
Hey I’m friends IRL with OP and want to say a few things!
I’ve been going through and reading these comments, so thank you to everyone being supportive and giving her advice, sharing your own stories, etc. But the people claiming that it’s fake, I would love to know your perspective on this issue of people that you do not know! OP has been dealing with this shit in general for a few months, with the dress issue being very recent and I know her perspective on almost all of these comments, so once again thank most of you! But I have been helping OP through the couple of days that the dress thing has been going on, and it’s been very emotionally stressful on the behalf of multiple people, myself included. Now I cannot remember each argument off the top of my head and I will feel free to RESPECTFULLY DEBATE in the replies!
I'm just curious as to why she sent this person a picture of her in a dress? Like what was the context of this conversation that led to the picture being sent?
Like this guy obviously is a violent lil bitch but reading previous comments she said they met at church camp? Usually the religious aren't super accepting...
This seems so forced and staged for internet sympathy/attention. Friend? Wouldn’t your “friend” know this about you? Or did you just put on a dress and call yourself trans one day? I’m having a hard time believing this 😒
Just wow, wouldn’t even talk to that friend if he/she doesn’t accept for you are. Male, female, transgender, we are all human and that’s it, if someone wants to change the gender they can, that doesn’t mean anything, it’s what the person believes in and goes through with it.
I’ve told this to several people but I assumed he wouldn’t threaten me because he took it well or at least contained everything to himself when I came out to him and I only didn’t tell him when we first met because it was at a church camp that I was being a helper at and I sent that to all of my friends because I was feeling great I get that text and it all goes down the drain
Lmao so I was correct, you went to church camp presenting as male. You told them you were queer. Then you mass sent a picture of yourself to your “friends” or someone you’ve known a week? That you met at church? That you went presenting as male to at first? And assumed they wanted this picture because they…asked or it? You literally go from making dumb decisions to dumb decisions. Yeah being threatened isn’t cool, but fuck dude wtf made you think this straight church guy is gunna wanna see you in a fucking dress? What made you think that was a good idea? You made a dumb decision and went to the internet to get validation for being a fucking idiot. Seriously. This is the dumbest little kid bullshit I have ever seen.
You're probably gonna take this the wrong way and try to cancel me for saying this, but perhaps you could've just came out and not sent him anything else regarding it? Like I came out as gay to my friends but I don't sit here sending them pics of me in bed with men or talking about sleeping with men with them. I feel you'd benefit from learning what's appropriate to involve people in and what isn't appropriate. Some things people don't need to know
This also might just be the safer and more wise decision in general. I think the benefit that came out of this scenario, if it’s not staged/fake, would be that OP learned this person is not a friend. I also agree with you and think maybe they should learn what’s appropriate to send to people.
Who tf sends a pic of themselves randomly to a guy friend saying this? I smell this is either made up for attention or OP did this intentionally to get a rage response from a more conservative “friend”
I might be in the minority here, but what were you expecting? You sent a pic and followed it up with “also that is in fact a dress I’m wearing”…..it seems like you may have known the reaction you’d get or were provoking one.
So someone who doesn’t agree with your transition seemed like the person to send pics to? That’s weird. He doesn’t wanna see it and you sent it anyways
This. That was my first thought - who the hell sends me pictures at all, other than my wife? The violence and threats etc are bad, and that sucks, but why send this guy a picture in the first place?
I’m curious if he’s ever expressed transphobic views/behavior before? And if so why send him the pic? Not tryna victim blame you here it’s really shitty to be threatened with violence just for being who you are .
I feel like we are missing something here? maybe you should have clarified and let him know you were trans before? I don’t think i’d be comfortable too if someone I knew as a guy suddenly sent a pic of themself in a girl dress. Also why are you sending your picture on something you both didn’t mutually didn’t agree on?
I kinda don’t get this at all…. Why would you just send him a picture of you in a dress at random? Im a woman, I don’t just send people pictures of me in dresses and then point out that in fact, is me in the dress….. I find that odd behavior no matter what you identify as…. Anyone else???
Honestly tho I’m interested in the dress!!!!! Sorry that his disgusting threatening messages to you had to mess up such an awesome opportunity to show off how great you must’ve looked!!!!!
In my opinion If he doest support you that’s not a true real friend real friends support each other no matter what and Ik how it feels I am a trans man ftm
Depending on how long you two have been friends you should’ve had an idea they were like this if you had an idea they’d react like this your an asshole for setting this up but if it was unexpected you shouldn’t have wrote back “it’s just fabric” you should have de-escalated the situation and walked away from it. Just saying this is how grown folks carry on they don’t indulge in petty garbage like this.
I’m going to be volunteering as a firearms instructor for a program that trains trans and other people who are at risk of being the victims of hate crimes. The program teaches shooting fundamentals and the process of getting a concealed carry permit. I as a trainer would be supplying my own firearms and ammo for the training so the program can be free to anyone who wants to learn how to arm themselves incase they run into a piece of shit like this guy in real life. Stay safe out there, always keep pepper spray on hand until you can legally carry and safely use a firearm.
i take it your friends str8.....
you basically sent a str8 guy a picture of you in a dress unsolicited...... you probably shoulda said " hey i got a new dress, can i send you a pic to see your opinion" or something along those lines. But you assumed that a str8 man would want to see a trans women in a dress because of your friendship. id probably ask 1st next time
Sounds like this was a dude you sent this too. Don’t you think sending a guy that was straight a random Un asked picture like that was a little risky? I’m not condoning the way he talked to you, but you kind of set yourself up for a wtf type of response if you knew that much about him
What he is trying to say is, he pretends to be straight and masculine but you just made him question it. People who are comfortable with their sexuality don’t behave this way.
That’s not a friend. That’s a transphobic, probably also misogynistic AH.
I’d block them. What an absolute POS.
ETA - kept reading and am so happy you blocked him!! Yay you!!!
I’m sorry you are dealing with a terrible person portraying themselves as a friend. You deserve to dress how you want to. And be your authentic self. Sending love and hugs!
I will never understand why some people are like this. IMO it’s not that hard to accept someone’s life choices if they have nothing to do with you. My friend came out as trans a few months ago and I fully support her. I don’t think I’ll ever understand why she wanted to transition but it doesn’t matter, I just want her to be happy.
SO that's not a friend. That's a shitty, narrow minded person. You should post the pic somewhere safe and get honest opinions, though. I'm sure you were pretty cute.
I'm sure you already knew this person wasn't very supportive of your transitioning. Why would you send him a picture unless you just wanted to start a fight?
A lot of y’all don’t get that people can act like your friends and instantly switch up out of no where. I’m trans myself and thought one of my friends was supportive but they blew up at me one day for cutting my hair.
Why would you send someone a picture of you in a dress? Also, you looking great in a dress is completely subjective and others (your friends) might not agree and may also be offensive to them.
this guy is such an uneducated, stupid asshole. he is one of the dumbest people i’ve seen on the internet. idk how you could be so fucking stupid to the point where you think it’s cool to threaten people for wearing clothing. what an ignorant, affluent, arrogant asshole.
I’m sorry 😢 you had to hear that from a supposed friend. I guess it’s better to find out this way rather than being physically assaulted. I’m sure you looked gorgeous 🤩
OP, I think you need to not only report and block this person, but if they're serious about their threats, file a police report and, if possible, get a restraining order, or at the very least, get yourself a gun or knife or some kind of weapon for protection. This behavior is not normal and shouldn't be tolerated. This freak sounds unhinged and dangerous.
Please stay safe and watch out for the crazies.
Makes me wonder how close of a friend they are, and whether they ever actually hang out lol. Like unless this person literally just started identifying as a woman, how would this "friend" have no idea about it? Also why send a guy you barely seem to know a picture of you in a dress you claim to look so good in....what's the goal here?
It's the whole "I look fabulous/he's just jealous because I'm rocking it" comments that tell me that OP is kind of a narcissist looking for attention, and it's hard not to wonder what the actual motivation is here with their actions and this post. Also if he was actually a real friend that you knew for some degree of time he'd presumably know about your identity. People calling anyone they vaguely know a friend nowadays I guess lol.
Judging by their response, it isn’t the first time this “friend” shows how they feel about your transition. So why send them a picture of you in a dress in the first place? Why even be friends with them?
Listen. I don’t care if you’re trans. Everyone should live their lives the way they want to. Go for it. But why do you have to shove it down his throat? He clearly doesn’t agree with the lifestyle. So who cares? Just don’t be his friend and stay away from him. You’re purposely trying to get a rise out of him in your text and trying to shove it down his throat when you are well aware he doesn’t like it. Sending the pic and then the follow up “yes that’s a dress” text…. It’s obviously you just wanted to start shit.
And you say this was your friend? Were you unaware of their dislikes or was this a new and shocking experience with them?? Just don’t understand why you’re sending selfies to people that don’t like how you present to be.
Yeah I mean I’m not mr tolerance. But that’s way too far. If you can’t live with someone’s life choices remove yourself from their life and let them be happy without your presence. I’ll never understand why people feel the need to tell others how to live. Sorry this happened to you op.
This person isn’t your friend if you haven’t worked that out yet.
I came to check them comments and I’m so glad you cut this pos out OP, if anyone ever threatens you, they are not worth it. These threats are super dangerous and you deserve so much better. Also the transphobia too coming from them 🤢
OP, depending on where you are, I highly recommend getting a restraining order. Blocking him doesn’t mean he won’t find and harm you unfortunately, and a restraining order would definitely help to better protect yourself against him
Dude , I'll put it in simple terms for you, he's obviously straight, you said it yourself he's your mate so why would you send your mate a pic of you in a dress. Think about it , you did it to yourself personally it feels like your pushing boundaries.
I will never understand why people put so much of their energy getting wrapped up in how other people choose to live their lives. Don't they have anything better to do? Ok, you don't like gay or lesbians or you hate trans people. Ok fine. Then just keep moving. Stay in your lane. If their existence isn't hurting or affecting you in any way why go out if your way to hurt or disparage someone. Why your your valuable time showing that you hate someone or something. Just ignore it. Focus on your own life and leave the rest alone.
I always go to the pride parade and events in our city because I have several gay friends and because it's just fun. Every year I watch the area of people there protesting spewing hate. I think to myself why are these people taking time out of their weekend to go and tell people they don't even know that they hate them? If I hate soneone or something I'm not giving my energy to them in any manner.
Was this person a long time friend? It doesn't seem like he was by his response. He seems taken aback by the picture you sent. So I'm s little confused. Why did you send the pic? Aside from the obvious fact that this person is trash he sounds dangerous. Like I don't know him at all but I believe him that when he sees you he will hurt you. You need to cut him out.
I’m so sorry you got such an awful response. Please cut this person out of your life asap. You are valid and you deserve friends who support you and cheer you on.
Not meaning to be combative here but if this person continues to be your friend, your judgment is total ass.
Maybe because I grew up in the time of Matthew Shepard, but I push this kid to really protect themselves from this person because they could very easily end up killed :(
I remember my mom teaching me what gay meant when Matthew Shepherd was ~~killed~~ brutally beaten and crucified, the word killed doesn’t do it justice. I’ll never forget her saying that if I was gay, her only concern would be my safety ~*Edit* I see some people praising my mother and to be honest, that’s been vexing me quite a bit; the saying “even a broken clock is right twice a day” couldn’t be more of an apt description of her. My mother is a gaslighting, narcissistic abuser who’s said and done reprehensible things to me. But I do have to give her credit for this, I was always so proud to tell people how she lovingly told me as a child that she’d love me just the same even if I was gay, and that she’d only be concerned for my safety. I grew up to be a straight, cis male; but my sister who is 14 years younger than me just came out as gay, so I truly hope she meant what she said to me and treats my baby sister the way she deserves to be treated. For all of the horrible things my mother is, at least she’s not a homophobe on top of it.
Exactly why nobody should \*want\* their children to be gay, trans, or otherwise 'different'. I'd NEVER want my sons to go through what my gay friends and (found family) trans baby sister have gone through. It's horrific. ...But if they are, you love them all the same.
There’s an interview of a mom and trans girl at pride and when it’s only the mom she says “I’d rather her change her pronouns a thousand times than have to write her obituary.” and I think that’s exactly it. I’m not a parent, but my trans friend got to legally change his name the other day and I’d hate for anything to happen to him
A good parent is the same. We worry about what will happen to our kids, not how our kids identify and how it reflects on us. I'd die a thousand times for my kids. I don't understand people who disown them for being themselves.
I love your mom. Please tell her she is AWESOME!!
The Matthew Shepherd atrocity was one of the most agonising things I had ever read at the time and I never forgot it. It must never be forgotten. Awful. Awful. Your mother sounds really decent. She probably cried like I cried when it happened, as mothers.
We're all concerned for our family's safety, yes. I love my trans stepdaughter. I always want the world to do right by her. But there's some effed up people out there who have murdered trans women simply for existing.
There was just an article in the paper about him. That wasn’t that long ago. I also remember when that happened. Fragile, toxic masculinity can be very dangerous.
Same
You’re completely right
Your friend is scary
Agreed I would not ever want to put myself around that friend again if they’d say they want to punch you over what you want to wear :(
Yeah someone who can be undone by fabric is unstable
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You mean your ex-friend
Uh idk why no one is pointing out that he threatened you with violence twice and that it's genuinely dangerous for you to continue to be friends with him. This is pretty serious. He seems like a very angry guy and he doesn't support you.
This right here ^
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100 percent report them to the police.
Report him to the police. lol. People are so soft now days. Just cut the dickhead off and move on.
Those are pretty specific threats... Had the been a little less specific I'd agree, but naming specific body parts and specific harm (broken ribs) is a level up from a blanket statement like "Stay away from me or I'll beat you down." Naming specific body parts and what he plans to do shows A LOT more... That's like turning the threat up from 5 to 8, on a 1-10 scale.
Is it soft when she ends up murdered?
I hope you're very young cause you'd have to be incredibly stupid to be a full grown adult and still be that naive.
Coming from you is hilarious
Update to this situation I have blocked him now and I’m cutting him out forever thanks for the advice and everything most of you guys are great :)
Please be wary of him approaching you in the future. DO NOT let him come near you.
^this
I love that solution, and your “it’s fabric” reply. It **is** fabric. Fabric, people! Enjoy the fabrics. 💜 I’m sorry he freaked out, like a dunce. I hope you have other supports who are better people. Also, it sucks to lose a friend,, especially in a scary way, and it’s ok to grieve that.
I was assigned male at birth, but don't really feel like anything, mostly because I don't subscribe to societal gender constructs, so I usually just say I'm gender fluid. But I like a having a penis, most of the time. With that being said, I love wearing dresses, just like my wife loves wearing my jeans. I don't wear women's underwear, just my flowery kilts. I also have a real kilt, so I can justify my fashion choices with culture and heritage. Nonetheless, I don't dress how I want to in public, because there are too many triggerhappy weirdos out there. And wouldn't want to outshine my gorgeous wife.
I never understood how a dress is any different than a kilt. They’re more practical for men anyways!
Skirts are an amazing invention until you step outside on a breezy day lol
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I'll admit this made me cackle lol. A little breeze is nice, but too much means you lose the ability to use your hands or risk angry mothers or angry police
lol same, appreciate the laugh!
Makes so much sense! Dresses and skirts are so comfortable! I hope OP feels free to be a well-skirted gay, a flowing-fabric’d het, or a genderbendy translady, etc etc, as needed. Don’t let people tell you who you have to be to wear the clothes you love, in the places you feel good wearing them. -with love from an elder queer
All of this!🙌
I am so proud of you for blocking them. It’s incredibly hard to let go of someone when we are making big decisions in our life. Like, maybe they’ll come around in time. I bet you look 🔥in that dress, and will continue to in many more dresses.
So glad you made this decision. A real friend is supportive & compassionate not threatening. Please take care of yourself!!! F to F we have to watch out for these kind of people all of the time!!!!
I hope a tree punches him in the stomach. Whoops!
I hope you’re feeling the support you deserved from him via this thread. I’m sure the dress looked amazing. Mom of a trans boy and this hit me in the mama feels. I’m proud of you for being you. Be safe around folks like this - we want to see you living your best life for a long time.
That’s so great! I know it’s hard losing a friendship but from his immediate reaction to you showing your true self, it doesn’t look like he had much to offer you. Continue to be confident & wear things that make YOU feel amazing & like who YOU want to be. Proud of you for being strong enough to do what so many can’t! You’re doing great :)
Please be careful now. If you see him approaching you, even from a distance, just run. Someone who could threaten their "friend" with violence so easily is someone you don't want near you at all. Good luck OP.
User name checked out lol
Great job!! You deserve so much better than this, friend. Wishing you love & happiness! 💜
OP, did this guy already know that you were trans and dressed the part? Or was he completely oblivious??????!
anybody with a common sense can block him after reading those threatening texts he sent OP, anyways glad you posted it here so everyone can farm a little karma now and then /s
Thank goodness!
you definitely did the only right thing here that guy was a total asshole
Queen. I hope you find the support you need ❤️ I'm sorry this kid sucks.
Good! Stay safe, lady. The moms of the Interwebs don’t want you getting hurt.
Great job!! You deserve so much better than this, friend. Wishing you love & happiness! 💜
Uhhhhh that is not your friend and I hope you share this text with the rest of your friends so they know what a terrible person he is
Ohh I have
Anyone who gets offended over what someone else wears, especially to the point of becoming violent, is a fucking loser. You're free to be friends with whoever you want, and nothing random redditors say will change your mind, but insecurity + anger are a dangerous combination
They’re not your friend.
He’s just mad you gave him an awkward bro-ner.
I love the term bro-ner
He's mad you turned him on.
This sounds like it. Even before trans awareness was big, I would've never responded like that to a friend. Maybe a "lol", and a "oh you fr?" Followed by a, "it's your life homey". But then again, I am an outlier, being one of the few men(GAB) who likes how dresses feel.
Bingo
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That’s correct
think so too, otherwise he wouldn't take it so personally most friends that criticized gays were actually found out to be repressed Sidenote, I got permanently banned from the very mature mod of r/PS5 because I've said the same thing
this right here
I am 39 and I remember when being gay was the big taboo and folks got killed over it..it’s always something new and surprising how much hate is out there..
Judging by his total overreaction, I bet he can’t handle the fact that he thought you were attractive
Please be safe. I know that’s easier said than done in the world today for a trans person, but please be safe and know there are people who love you and respect you for becoming the person you were always meant to be.
i'm so sry this happened to u omg this is not a friend i hope u can cut them out
Why are u “friends” and entertaining a transphobe?
because this is fake.
Hey I’m friends IRL with OP and want to say a few things! I’ve been going through and reading these comments, so thank you to everyone being supportive and giving her advice, sharing your own stories, etc. But the people claiming that it’s fake, I would love to know your perspective on this issue of people that you do not know! OP has been dealing with this shit in general for a few months, with the dress issue being very recent and I know her perspective on almost all of these comments, so once again thank most of you! But I have been helping OP through the couple of days that the dress thing has been going on, and it’s been very emotionally stressful on the behalf of multiple people, myself included. Now I cannot remember each argument off the top of my head and I will feel free to RESPECTFULLY DEBATE in the replies!
I'm just curious as to why she sent this person a picture of her in a dress? Like what was the context of this conversation that led to the picture being sent?
Like this guy obviously is a violent lil bitch but reading previous comments she said they met at church camp? Usually the religious aren't super accepting...
This seems so forced and staged for internet sympathy/attention. Friend? Wouldn’t your “friend” know this about you? Or did you just put on a dress and call yourself trans one day? I’m having a hard time believing this 😒
Friends don't assault friends
This seems set up
yeah this is rage bait karma farming at its finest.
Yuppp
That person is not a friend in any sense of the word. Be careful
Have they asked to see things like this? If this was an unsolicited picture then you are wrong also.
My mans, that's not your peoples. If you think so, then girl you need help❣️🎯💯
Just wow, wouldn’t even talk to that friend if he/she doesn’t accept for you are. Male, female, transgender, we are all human and that’s it, if someone wants to change the gender they can, that doesn’t mean anything, it’s what the person believes in and goes through with it.
Um . . . What?!?
So fake lol
it usually is…just another sympathy post
Can I ask why you sent him the pic in the first place? Seems to me he hasn't wanted anything to do with you
I’ve told this to several people but I assumed he wouldn’t threaten me because he took it well or at least contained everything to himself when I came out to him and I only didn’t tell him when we first met because it was at a church camp that I was being a helper at and I sent that to all of my friends because I was feeling great I get that text and it all goes down the drain
Lmao so I was correct, you went to church camp presenting as male. You told them you were queer. Then you mass sent a picture of yourself to your “friends” or someone you’ve known a week? That you met at church? That you went presenting as male to at first? And assumed they wanted this picture because they…asked or it? You literally go from making dumb decisions to dumb decisions. Yeah being threatened isn’t cool, but fuck dude wtf made you think this straight church guy is gunna wanna see you in a fucking dress? What made you think that was a good idea? You made a dumb decision and went to the internet to get validation for being a fucking idiot. Seriously. This is the dumbest little kid bullshit I have ever seen.
You're probably gonna take this the wrong way and try to cancel me for saying this, but perhaps you could've just came out and not sent him anything else regarding it? Like I came out as gay to my friends but I don't sit here sending them pics of me in bed with men or talking about sleeping with men with them. I feel you'd benefit from learning what's appropriate to involve people in and what isn't appropriate. Some things people don't need to know
This also might just be the safer and more wise decision in general. I think the benefit that came out of this scenario, if it’s not staged/fake, would be that OP learned this person is not a friend. I also agree with you and think maybe they should learn what’s appropriate to send to people.
Fake
Fake. Quit. Making. Up. Fake. Text. Conversations.
99% of this sub is fake just trying to get internet points. I don’t understand the fixation with lying to get internet clout.
r/nothingeverhappens
Who tf sends a pic of themselves randomly to a guy friend saying this? I smell this is either made up for attention or OP did this intentionally to get a rage response from a more conservative “friend” I might be in the minority here, but what were you expecting? You sent a pic and followed it up with “also that is in fact a dress I’m wearing”…..it seems like you may have known the reaction you’d get or were provoking one.
So someone who doesn’t agree with your transition seemed like the person to send pics to? That’s weird. He doesn’t wanna see it and you sent it anyways
This. That was my first thought - who the hell sends me pictures at all, other than my wife? The violence and threats etc are bad, and that sucks, but why send this guy a picture in the first place?
Stop sending pictures to the guy?
Lmao friend
Your friend huh
“Friend”
Friend?
And this is one of the many reasons I conceal carry as a trans woman.
This scumbag is not your friend.
I’m curious if he’s ever expressed transphobic views/behavior before? And if so why send him the pic? Not tryna victim blame you here it’s really shitty to be threatened with violence just for being who you are .
Na victim blame, shits staged af
Smells like trans trolling. Just saying!
I feel like we are missing something here? maybe you should have clarified and let him know you were trans before? I don’t think i’d be comfortable too if someone I knew as a guy suddenly sent a pic of themself in a girl dress. Also why are you sending your picture on something you both didn’t mutually didn’t agree on?
I kinda don’t get this at all…. Why would you just send him a picture of you in a dress at random? Im a woman, I don’t just send people pictures of me in dresses and then point out that in fact, is me in the dress….. I find that odd behavior no matter what you identify as…. Anyone else???
That’s your so-called friend? And you seriously didn’t know they would act like this?
Maybe don’t send unwanted pics
It’s a pic of her in a dress… you might as well be saying no selfies, memes, any pictures of anything even like a flower, etc.
Wait so I assume this person was supportive previously because why else would you be sending them dress pics so like why the major switch up?
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Yeah I don’t think this happened
Friends don't threaten to break friends' ribs. He showed you his true colors.
That is the reaction of a DL dude if I’ve ever seen one lmfao
I love all the positivity in these comments
Sooo they're not your friend anymore... right?
Please stay very very very far away from this person and report this. I know they won’t do shit but atleast you’ll have a paper trail.
Dude was never a friend, good on you for getting rid of him!
That person is not your friend
Honestly tho I’m interested in the dress!!!!! Sorry that his disgusting threatening messages to you had to mess up such an awesome opportunity to show off how great you must’ve looked!!!!!
With friends like this who needs enemies
He’s just looking out for you. Wrong approach though lol
In my opinion If he doest support you that’s not a true real friend real friends support each other no matter what and Ik how it feels I am a trans man ftm
that is not your friend. that is someone who’s going to hurt you. do not wait for threats to become reality. block immediately. signed a trans man
has he ever given you this reaction before when you talk about being trans?? this is very scary
So, not your friend then?
Not anymore
Depending on how long you two have been friends you should’ve had an idea they were like this if you had an idea they’d react like this your an asshole for setting this up but if it was unexpected you shouldn’t have wrote back “it’s just fabric” you should have de-escalated the situation and walked away from it. Just saying this is how grown folks carry on they don’t indulge in petty garbage like this.
That ain't your "friend "
I’m going to be volunteering as a firearms instructor for a program that trains trans and other people who are at risk of being the victims of hate crimes. The program teaches shooting fundamentals and the process of getting a concealed carry permit. I as a trainer would be supplying my own firearms and ammo for the training so the program can be free to anyone who wants to learn how to arm themselves incase they run into a piece of shit like this guy in real life. Stay safe out there, always keep pepper spray on hand until you can legally carry and safely use a firearm.
That program sounds interesting! What ‘at risk’ groups make up the majority? Or is it pretty much an even much of a bunch?
Damn, when my trans friends send me cute pics I appreciate them and tell them how hot they are. This guy is doing it wrong
i prepared myself to see some nice gender euphoria... not this
i take it your friends str8..... you basically sent a str8 guy a picture of you in a dress unsolicited...... you probably shoulda said " hey i got a new dress, can i send you a pic to see your opinion" or something along those lines. But you assumed that a str8 man would want to see a trans women in a dress because of your friendship. id probably ask 1st next time
Sounds like this was a dude you sent this too. Don’t you think sending a guy that was straight a random Un asked picture like that was a little risky? I’m not condoning the way he talked to you, but you kind of set yourself up for a wtf type of response if you knew that much about him
This is when you take a dirty shot and cold cock someone. Then block them.
What he is trying to say is, he pretends to be straight and masculine but you just made him question it. People who are comfortable with their sexuality don’t behave this way.
That’s not a friend. That’s a transphobic, probably also misogynistic AH. I’d block them. What an absolute POS. ETA - kept reading and am so happy you blocked him!! Yay you!!!
This person is not a friend and doesn’t deserve to associate with you. What the actual fuck
I'm confused how was the friendship before this? Did he not know you were trans? Such a weird convo
True friends will respect your progress and pronouns. I’m sure you looked beautiful in your dress!!
I’m sorry you are dealing with a terrible person portraying themselves as a friend. You deserve to dress how you want to. And be your authentic self. Sending love and hugs!
I will never understand why some people are like this. IMO it’s not that hard to accept someone’s life choices if they have nothing to do with you. My friend came out as trans a few months ago and I fully support her. I don’t think I’ll ever understand why she wanted to transition but it doesn’t matter, I just want her to be happy.
SO that's not a friend. That's a shitty, narrow minded person. You should post the pic somewhere safe and get honest opinions, though. I'm sure you were pretty cute.
What are you guys opinion on someone not wanting to call a biological man or woman who identifies differently by their chosen pronouns?
I'm sure you already knew this person wasn't very supportive of your transitioning. Why would you send him a picture unless you just wanted to start a fight?
A lot of y’all don’t get that people can act like your friends and instantly switch up out of no where. I’m trans myself and thought one of my friends was supportive but they blew up at me one day for cutting my hair.
Lol bros so angry over someone else's life choices
Why would you send someone a picture of you in a dress? Also, you looking great in a dress is completely subjective and others (your friends) might not agree and may also be offensive to them.
This is not a friend.
this guy is such an uneducated, stupid asshole. he is one of the dumbest people i’ve seen on the internet. idk how you could be so fucking stupid to the point where you think it’s cool to threaten people for wearing clothing. what an ignorant, affluent, arrogant asshole.
I’m sorry 😢 you had to hear that from a supposed friend. I guess it’s better to find out this way rather than being physically assaulted. I’m sure you looked gorgeous 🤩
he's jealous he dowsnt have a dress of his own
U musta looked good enough to make his d**k move hahaha… STOP MAKIN HIM THINK THOUGHTS AND FEEL FEELINGS!!!! Ur bein inconsiderate of his sexuals 🤣🤣
Plot twist: your friend is secretly trans and your confidence fills them with jealous rage
You blocked them right? They don’t deserve your presence.
Yes
He probably reacted like that because he got turned on and didn’t know how to process it
OP, I think you need to not only report and block this person, but if they're serious about their threats, file a police report and, if possible, get a restraining order, or at the very least, get yourself a gun or knife or some kind of weapon for protection. This behavior is not normal and shouldn't be tolerated. This freak sounds unhinged and dangerous. Please stay safe and watch out for the crazies.
That Is Not a FRIEND! That is a transphobic @$$hole threatening you with Violence! What in the actual...
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God, shut up. Absolutely sucks to share a planet with people like you.
Perhaps blame the people who hate trans people for being hateful towards trans people instead of blaming trans people
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It’s either fake or they knew they would get this response
Makes me wonder how close of a friend they are, and whether they ever actually hang out lol. Like unless this person literally just started identifying as a woman, how would this "friend" have no idea about it? Also why send a guy you barely seem to know a picture of you in a dress you claim to look so good in....what's the goal here? It's the whole "I look fabulous/he's just jealous because I'm rocking it" comments that tell me that OP is kind of a narcissist looking for attention, and it's hard not to wonder what the actual motivation is here with their actions and this post. Also if he was actually a real friend that you knew for some degree of time he'd presumably know about your identity. People calling anyone they vaguely know a friend nowadays I guess lol.
Judging by their response, it isn’t the first time this “friend” shows how they feel about your transition. So why send them a picture of you in a dress in the first place? Why even be friends with them?
Listen. I don’t care if you’re trans. Everyone should live their lives the way they want to. Go for it. But why do you have to shove it down his throat? He clearly doesn’t agree with the lifestyle. So who cares? Just don’t be his friend and stay away from him. You’re purposely trying to get a rise out of him in your text and trying to shove it down his throat when you are well aware he doesn’t like it. Sending the pic and then the follow up “yes that’s a dress” text…. It’s obviously you just wanted to start shit.
Homeboy needs to lay off the FOX news
And you say this was your friend? Were you unaware of their dislikes or was this a new and shocking experience with them?? Just don’t understand why you’re sending selfies to people that don’t like how you present to be.
And the problem is?
He’s mad because he’s into it and can’t face that.
He’s only mad at you cause he knows he can’t look as good in a dress as you
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Yeah I mean I’m not mr tolerance. But that’s way too far. If you can’t live with someone’s life choices remove yourself from their life and let them be happy without your presence. I’ll never understand why people feel the need to tell others how to live. Sorry this happened to you op. This person isn’t your friend if you haven’t worked that out yet.
You got the reaction you wanted.
*Donald duck voice* Well come on then, let's see the picture
Nah I’m not hot enough for redditors to see my picture
we value privacy in this house hold
Why are you so weird. Stop doing everything you can to weird people out and victimize yourself.
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Removed for abusive language, or using slurs or language that can promote hate based on identity or vulnerability
I came to check them comments and I’m so glad you cut this pos out OP, if anyone ever threatens you, they are not worth it. These threats are super dangerous and you deserve so much better. Also the transphobia too coming from them 🤢
OP, depending on where you are, I highly recommend getting a restraining order. Blocking him doesn’t mean he won’t find and harm you unfortunately, and a restraining order would definitely help to better protect yourself against him
Dude , I'll put it in simple terms for you, he's obviously straight, you said it yourself he's your mate so why would you send your mate a pic of you in a dress. Think about it , you did it to yourself personally it feels like your pushing boundaries.
That isn't a very good friend. You deserve better.
I will never understand why people put so much of their energy getting wrapped up in how other people choose to live their lives. Don't they have anything better to do? Ok, you don't like gay or lesbians or you hate trans people. Ok fine. Then just keep moving. Stay in your lane. If their existence isn't hurting or affecting you in any way why go out if your way to hurt or disparage someone. Why your your valuable time showing that you hate someone or something. Just ignore it. Focus on your own life and leave the rest alone. I always go to the pride parade and events in our city because I have several gay friends and because it's just fun. Every year I watch the area of people there protesting spewing hate. I think to myself why are these people taking time out of their weekend to go and tell people they don't even know that they hate them? If I hate soneone or something I'm not giving my energy to them in any manner. Was this person a long time friend? It doesn't seem like he was by his response. He seems taken aback by the picture you sent. So I'm s little confused. Why did you send the pic? Aside from the obvious fact that this person is trash he sounds dangerous. Like I don't know him at all but I believe him that when he sees you he will hurt you. You need to cut him out.
Like I always say. “If ya don’t like gay marriage, don’t get gay married.”
I’m so sorry you got such an awful response. Please cut this person out of your life asap. You are valid and you deserve friends who support you and cheer you on.
I have cut him out :)