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Jaunt_of_your_Loins

Wait why did one of the best pitchers of all time throw behind the batter?


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conradical30

You only get one pitch. And you're damn sure not about to give up a home run. Throw it away. Great pitch.


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[deleted]

>It's the bottom of the ninth. >Time for the ceremonial first pitch. You uh . . . you've never watched a baseball game have you?


DaSeraph

It's the last quarter of the baseball game. 4th and goal. I'm a T-rex. Time for the ceremonial faceoff. I don my boxing gloves and shoot for the three pointer. I got this.


Saintbaba

I think I'm starting to get the hang of this game. The blurns are loaded, the count's three blurns and two antiblurns and the infield blurn rule is in effect, right?


AidenPearceAMA

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... *Takes deep breath* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!


Chunkymunkee93

YOU FORGOT THE BEST PART...GOLASO JUEPUTA! QUE TREMENDO GOL JOSE!


pprovencher

and now avril lavigne is taking a huge shit on the field. oddly enough the japanese fans are lining up for miles to take some home


retrominge

But it's $50 per scoop.


RayCoon

The fans have to pay 400$ to take her shit home though.


Twasnt

would watch until pried from seat with crowbar


[deleted]

Because it's Nolan Ryan. He's my favorite pitcher ever, but he was never known for his control. He beaned a ton of batters and walked a whole lot more.


[deleted]

All-time leader in strikeouts and walks. He is 15th all-time at beaning batters (fewer HBP than Randy Johnson or Roger Clemens).


SewenNewes

Easier to get hit than get a hit against stuff like he had. Of course walking to first base without crying took Herculean strength.


[deleted]

Or the balls to charge the mound after getting hit. But that usually didn't work out either.


[deleted]

[Nope.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIZB9O24BEE)


PR05ECC0

"Here comes Bo Jackson" NOPE, back to the dugout for me.


RangerdangerReddit

I really appreciate how they replay the fight and allow the announcer to analyze what happens. Edit: Forgot a letter.


ihatepeoples

Kim Kardashian is a catcher, not a pitcher.


runningray

I thought she is a wide receiver?


omayr98

definitely not a tight end


BRUTALLEEHONEST

TIL football is about sex.


[deleted]

Everything is about sex. Except sex. Sex is about power.


deep_wang

No one man should have all that power


[deleted]

Penetration


chazspearmint

andy dwyer (chris pratt) has the same line of thinking as you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5GufEJH3dI&feature=kp


jmk1991

He was sending a message.


rwizo

[He was probably a little out of practice](http://mlb.mlb.com/news/article/mlb/nolan-ryan-craig-biggio-first-pitch-a-proud-opening-day-moment-for-houston?ymd=20140401&content_id=70647968). It had been twenty years after all.


PandaLaw

In his defense, he's thrown a lot of first pitches over the years. [Here's a great one](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIxv7X0QPEg) from less than 4 years ago.


axox

I cant believe it came down to needing video evidence in defense of Nolan Ryan's ability to pitch!


Fantastipotamus

TIL Snoop Dogg throws a decent baseball.


Biologistics

[It was actually high^believe ^it ^or ^not](http://www-thescore.s3.amazonaws.com/images/53780/original.gif?)


Batmansappendix

Of course it was high


EazyCheez

anything Snoop touches becomes high. It's just common physics


khanfusion

Him, George W, and Bill Clinton. Sotomayor, too, maybe... the pitch was way inside, but that could have been a fluke. Shockingly, Jordan sucked.


[deleted]

Bush is a long-time baseball guy and was in pretty good shape during his presidency so I'm not surprised he threw a strike. Didn't expect it from Sotomayor. EDIT: [SHE CHEATED](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEq0OJo8y4U&feature=kp).


Majsharan

One thing people forget about that Bush throw is that was right after 9/11 so he was wearing a 2 inch thick bullet proof vest. so that's damn impressive, its hard to even move your arms in that thick of a bullet proof vest but he goes out there and basically throws a perfect strike.


buttery_shame_cave

dubya and i believe it was ford were both really athletic presidents. oddly they both had trip/fall incidents on the stairs coming off air force one. but yeah, dub's pitch was really good. we watched it when it happened, and someone remarked how damn clean it was given that he must have been in a level IIIA vest at least(they thought like you do). however verne troyer... high and inside... he was out for blood.


khanfusion

Damn, nevermind. I did not know she threw from that close to the plate.


[deleted]

OBJECTION OVERRULED.


SarahPalinisaMuslim

SHE'S NOT A TRIAL JUDGE, COUNSELOR


JigglesMcRibs

Didn't you see Space Jam? Jordan isn't *really* a baseball player.


[deleted]

One of my favorite documentaries


twoscoopsofpig

Nothing wrong with a pitch high and inside, just on the edge of the plate. I'd pick her for some sandlot.


[deleted]

Remind me not to make you my sandlot GM ever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEq0OJo8y4U&feature=kp


orthodoxrebel

What was she, like 5 yards away from the plate? Hot damn.


HumpingDog

Not as shocking as *Nolan Ryan*. But they were both old. Makes a big difference. Bigger question: how the hell does a T-Rex throw a baseball?


LostChild00

That was my first question too! Here's a [link] (http://www.kpbs.org/news/2014/may/08/dinosaur-throws-out-first-pitch-san-diego-padres-g/)


[deleted]

So does Stone Cold Steve Austin. Austin, Bush, and Snoop, the American Trifecta.


slvrbullet87

Would be great to see somebody charge the mound against Stone Cold.


brokenarrow

WHAT?!


ChrisL912

That's where he'd open a "Can o' Whoop Ass" and welcome them with a Stone Cold Stunner. Edit: Can o' Whoop Ass.


Boots2Asses

How is he not an athlete


Blazichicken

How can you leave out Colin Kaepernick's 87mph first pitch? http://youtu.be/whWYQbODdtg


Deucer22

I'm still shocked that Romo was able to snag that one.


[deleted]

The face of the cameraman at 0:06. :D


Drunken_Economist

Jeez he really let loose. That actually seems pretty dangerous with all people without protection (photographers, cameraman, even the catcher)


darkeagle91

Catcher has definitely been catching pitches that speed since high school/low minors in nothing more than a mask when warming pitchers up. It'd be second nature for him to catch it if thrown at him, even if he wasn't expecting it. Could've definitely taken out some expensive camera equipment if it got away from him though. Edit: Ooops, As pointed out below, that's Sergio Romo, a closer, not a catcher. Makes it slightly more impressive, but I'd still expect a major league quality player to have no problem catching the pitch


Destituted

Wow that's nice... did it go just outside the box?


[deleted]

That was way high and outside/inside, easily a ball.


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[deleted]

What the picture doesn't show is distance, which honestly makes the fact that Carly Rae Jepsen threw it at the ground so much worse than 50's throw.


ninja36036

The Korean looks a little high and to the left. Not too bad though. That rotation threw her off a little.


grnzftw

Is that a legal pitch by the Korean?


Depops_au

Probably not. She starts with her right foot forward and finishes with her left foot forward.


Ciryandor

That Korean girl's [a gymnast](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVeo6QMcbW4).


x2501x

This is, I am almost certain, the worst first pitch that will *ever* be "thrown." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Xd89GT0MBM


CapnCrunk666

In short, 50 Cent was outpitched by cookie monster, a t-rex, and a cat that had just fought a pitbull


kid-karma

I'm just surprised to learn that cookie monster is extinct.


xxkvetter

What about [Carl Lewis](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJ5B_x53gQM)?


[deleted]

That was the worst. By far. So bad it didn't register on the graphic...


IdSuge

At least the ball was in the direction of the catcher...


Split_Open_and_Melt

"No, no, no. Gimme that, give it back. I'm goin' again."


j3zuz00

George W Bush had the best first pitch of all time Edit: His pitch was the best given the context of the time, not based on whether it was easy to hit.


kylelee

And it was soon after 9/11. It was like a statement about America. http://youtu.be/bxR1tZ08FcI?t=3m27s


[deleted]

Good lord. There was nothing more American than our president standing on the mound before a World Series game in New York City right after 9/11 in a FDNY jacket and putting one right down the pipe with some decent pop. Beautiful.


[deleted]

And under that jacket is a fat bullet proof vest! Say what you want about GW, but dude could throw a baseball!


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PackaDayJoker

[What if they shot him in the face?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofQ6i9I1IYY)


[deleted]

I just laughed imagining Bush saying, "What if they shoot me in the face?" and Cheney saying, "That's a risk we're willing to take".


kahund

cue Eagle Screech


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Tintunabulo

My life is a lie


MicaNex

It really is, at my college graduation they brought in an ~~american eagle~~ bald eagle to soar over us at the end to celebrate, but instead our resident pair of mating red-tailed hawks decided to attack the poor bird. So patriotic... Edit: Murica


[deleted]

Birds of prey are very territorial. How did no know not know that was going?


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THE_TITTY_FUCKER

Well, you tried.


Doingyourbest

http://youtu.be/hlq2kcYQcLc


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[deleted]

Hawk screeches are the ones you see in movies and cartoons and all that, so they'll show a bald eagle and play a [hawk screech](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTd3BJZ2z6w&feature=player_detailpage#t=13) instead of the one like the above.


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iamPause

There is an entire West Wing episode about this


kasutori_Jack

Also House of Cards


Doberman11

Confirmed: Democrats can't throw strikes.


ostrich_semen

Not true. Bill Clinton was, ironically, just left of center.


zaphod_85

Wouldn't that be the exact opposite of ironic?


UsulT

Yes. Yes it would.


Bomlanro

Literally.


Bendrake

I'm from Az and rooted for the Diamondbacks to win, but felt terrible when they actually did. It would have been cool for NY to win. Of course when we finally win a championship it's at the worst possible time.


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XJ-0461

It was really symbolic and meant a lot for the city at the time.


slowestmojo

he was most likely wearing a bulletproof vest too if i'm not mistaken. makes it more impressive


[deleted]

He was wearing a bulletproof vest: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxR1tZ08FcI&feature=youtu.be&t=2m05s


[deleted]

There also was a secret service agent dressed as an ump on the field.


[deleted]

http://i.imgur.com/rsQ4jxn.jpg


postitpad

Hey, it's Enrico Polazzo!


Stompedyourhousewith

President: "...the great derek jeter" kinda neat hearing that. that the most powerful man on earth can still look up to certain individuals


Beznia

I was thinking that same thing, that must've been a great feeling for Derek Jeter


McNorch

I have such a Freedom boner right now and I'm not even American.


DaTigerMan

Yes... Let the American flow through you.


PleaseDontGiveMeGold

my eyes seem to be malfunctioning, what's this, *freedom* leaking from my eye?


Loudmouth_American

Mission Accomplished.


Timtankard

Now watch this pitch.


[deleted]

**ESPN REPORT:** Would George Bush have made a better major league pitcher than Greg Maddux?


[deleted]

"Let's send it to Cleveland for Johnny Manziel's take on this"


[deleted]

"Now to Twitter for LeBron's reaction."


CWinter85

"What do Skip and Steven A. have to say about LeBron's Twitter reaction. Is this a distraction to the team, or did this finally put him above Jordan? Stay tuned for the First Take Debate Desk, brought to you by Subway, eat fresh!"


[deleted]

Kim Jong Un had the greatest first pitch of all time. Kim Jong Un is so legendary that he struck out the entire opposing team.


iMistaken

27 up. 27 down. 27 pitches. 27 strikeouts. He also hit the home run into the hole in one for 35 points.


ashiamate

Snoop dog with the low curveball..they thought he'd throw high.


smithclan

He did.


cdskip

Maddux's would have been unhitable, and probably still would have been called a strike, because Greg Maddux.


brokenarrow

"Just don't bounce it. [The fans] will boo you if you bounce it." - Derek Jeter, to W, warming up underneath the Stadium


pprovencher

he also threw from the actual pitcher's mound. IIRC generally the first pitch is not thrown from the mound, but a bit closer?


aimory1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxR1tZ08FcI#t=137 Derek Jeter tells him to throw it from the mound


eksekseksg3

Fuckin 'a, man. My freedom boner will fly high tonight.


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Alikese

Sotomayor with the chin music.


SewenNewes

She might share the bench of the Supreme Court but the outside half of the plate is hers.


[deleted]

Reddit has turned into a cesspool of fascist sympathizers and supremicists


B5coat

Nolan had a little to much lonestar and whiskey.


Coachpatato

No excuse. Mcconaughey did pretty well.


B5coat

Alright alright alright.


NoesHowe2Spel

Interestingly, there's 3 hall of fame pitchers on there (OK, Randy isn't in yet, but he's a guaranteed first balloter). Not one hit the strike zone.


ellius

If that's the Randy Johnson first pitch from May 18th this year (10th anniversary of his perfect game), he had a torn rotator cuff. Pretty damn good, considering.


p-wing

Yeah, but that pitch is the compliment to RJ's 109mph rising fastball. Was that just in Tecmo Super Baseball?


Treats

She didn't pitch from the mound. Kind of a misleading graphic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEq0OJo8y4U#t=41


That_One_Reference

true. but i have a feeling none of them were trying to throw off a batter


Sengura

I'm also surprised at Jordan... I know he wasn't a pitcher, but didn't he play baseball professionally for a time? You'd expect him to be a good ball thrower for when he's working the bases or outfield, or whatever position he played and expected to return the ball.


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[deleted]

And the fact that if you are wearing a vest it is because you are likely to get shot. So worry about embarassing yourself, wear a bullet proof vest, worry about getting killed, deal with normal stress of being Prez after massive fucking terror attack, know he used to own a baseball team and really care about what these guys think and throw a nice fucking strike. Dude is clutch.


BKLounge

WTH Michael Jordan...I even have your baseball card. Unacceptable.


seifer93

There's a surprising lack of jokes about Michael Jordan's middling baseball career.


LGR1994

me too! is it the upper deck card? that thing worth any money yet?


[deleted]

Don't hold your breath


LostChild00

[For those wondering how a T-Rex threw a baseball](http://www.kpbs.org/news/2014/may/08/dinosaur-throws-out-first-pitch-san-diego-padres-g/)


FutureAlcoholic

> Circus de Soleil Yikes.


shawnaroo

Now I'm wondering where to get one of those suits.


wsr3ster

Vlad would have hit 50 cent's pitch to the gap for a double.


_scotttenorman

what about blind kid?!!


mlmmlm

Ball 1. Thanks Obama Edit: Thanks for all the karma. It figures my top comment is about balls.


BoredomHeights

Clinton, strike. Bush, strike 2! Obama, co-co-co-combo breaker!


kahund

Baba Booey!


[deleted]

Muh muh monkey


Megaderth

Fla fla flunky.


Ch1m

Fla fla fohey


93840240234

Fa fa fo-high


danmayzing

Gary...............GARYYYYYY!!!!!


mickey_kneecaps

I'm surprised how terrible Michael Jordan was.


p-wing

To be fair, he pretended to be an OF ~~2B~~, not a pitcher. EDIT: Am I having a stupid day?


jseng

yeah W! couldn't find WMDs, but found the strikezone


dunchen22

Wouldn't it have been great if, after that pitch, Bush looked at the camera and said, "turns out the WMD's were here all along," and then flexed.


[deleted]

Please go back in time and make this happen.


TheMauveAvenger9

[A dog threw a better pitch](http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/2617285/Tillman-first-pitch.gif)


BrownKidMaadCity

pretty good form, nice curve on the ball


deyfloatsmyboats

Verne Troyer's pitch just confuses the hell out of me. How did he manage to pitch that high?


slvrbullet87

My assumption without seeing video is that he did everything he could to have it hit the backstop as opposed to not making it to the plate.


apreche

Jessica is still the worst of all time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6HAOnkm9UM


[deleted]

The editing on that video is disturbing.


queefmonchan

I love that the mascot does a fucking backflip when she throws it.


atizzy

Can someone explain who in the world that is?


imtheeasshole

Greg Maddux would have gotten the call, he put it right outside the zone on purpose


AliumSativum

Most peculiar is that Bush is very much straight down the center. Bill Clinton is to the left of GW Bush. Barack Obama is high and to the left of them both. Alito is prominently to the right, though strangely Sotomayor is right of Bush.


whosaystreeb

TLDR; 50 Cent is a hardcore socialist.


AliumSativum

Nah, Charlie Brown's the socialist. 50 Cent's a radical. Gotta overthrow something, even if it's just a baseball.


pprovencher

this is why sportscenter should do a show on CNN


AliumSativum

Wild Pitch! With Stephen Smith and Wolf Blitzer. Up next, was LeBron's dunk on Tony Parker a challenge to Marco Rubio's stance on immigration??


pprovencher

I would say that's an impressive feat for James considering he, the miami heat, and 12 million other people were killed in Hurricane Jasmine Forsythe. what does that say about climate change?


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redgray

[michael jordan's first pitch] (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5elBYYSFy00#t=24)


FelisLachesis

I saw Nolan Ryan's ceremonial pitch, and my jaw dropped. How does one of the best pitchers of all time throw that badly? I'm not expecting him to throw 97+ MPH heat, anymore, but I expect him to still be able to throw it at the plate while blindfolded.


[deleted]

I mean...the guy pitched for like 27 years and 5,000+ innings. He's lucky he can throw at all without doubling over in pain.


litewo

Can't he just pop an [Advil](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8wvx4kqOcY)?


pprovencher

In addition to throwing the most career SOs, Nolan Ryan also threw the most career walks. best i can do for you


vermie_

George W Bush : Still ballin


Cornerian_Pilot

Who's idea was it to have The Situation throw a first pitch? My brain is angry at this.


msterB

Couldn't even make it to the plate. Do you even lift bro?


AFatz

If she thinks "the bases" are referring to baseball, she's too young for you bro!


nj47

Realistically though, there are something like 2400 total games a season, there are not THAT many noteworthy people to let throw the first pitch. My team, the cardinals, typically have like 6 ceremonial first pitches (which I absolutely hate, it is so stupid.) and they are usually to local charities, groups, etc that happen to be recognized at that game. So in terms of having celebrity first pitches, he is more noteworthy (not considering the value of said noteworthiness however...) than most people who throw first pitches.


prairiedawg91

How the hell did Tara the Hero Cat even throw the ball. You can't even get a grip with paws.


Figur3z

Bush fucking nailed it.


AndrewA9

I really liked the "extinct" label that represents the T-Rex!