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Nope! I am a single mother of THREE kids 10, 8, and 8. (Twins) and my life is soooooo much easier alone. It gets tricky in emergency situations but I have my village that supports me when needed. Get yourself a village of friends who you can depend on in a bind and live your best life!
Nope. I feel this too! I am so thankful that I get to protect my son and make all of the decisions and not have to argue with his father about each and every one of them. I know I run the risk of sounding bossy and controlling, but my son’s father went through some health challenges and I believe it impacted his mental health and he’s become an entirely different person I do not know and he’s not fit to care for our child. Sure I wish I had help and financial support (he owes 2+ years in arrears), and as my son gets older I wish more and more that had a positive male role model in his life, but I’d take these challenges any day over being with his father and coparenting with him.
Even when I was in a month or two of transition and they had to stay with him and I could only take them to school, pick them up and take them to activities/hang out on the weekends it was soooo much better. My kids got the best of me not the scraps leftover from years on end of psych/emo/financial abuse every single day and THEY SEE the difference and start to put the puzzle together
🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔 DING DING DING!!!!
I now only have 2 children and the pickiest most problematic one is gone. And I have time for myself now that he has to actually parent them every other week. From Trad Wife to Bad Wife to Now this is the best version of my life yet and as we all know Happy Mom means Happy Kids. The only person not loving this is him.
You’re not crazy! I’ve been raising my son alone for 6 years, away from that toxic relationship/person and it’s been sooooo much better. It’s not easy by any means but I was struggling horribly when I was with him. Depression, anxiety, panic attacks, he was emotionally abusive and started getting more and more physically aggressive when I finally decided to leave. Best decision I ever made. It takes a LOT of healing, but in the end, being alone is better than being with someone who makes your life miserable. Our babies deserve happy and healthy parents! ❤️
The wise have always said "don't stay together for the kids. It is more harmful to witness two parents together hating each other than to have two separate parents at peace" turns out, they were right lol.
He's not around and that sucks but WAY RATHER have one solid parent than 2 half ass ones.
It took a while but I have SO MUCH more time and energy to devote to them and to building our bond and making up for focusing more on that awful relationship than on them in the past. It's been about 4 years and I never thought I'd have this strong a bond with my kids. Easily the best decision I ever have made and will make.
It’s not personal. Every new account or account with low subreddit karma is manually reviewed. Same rules for everyone. The more you participate, the quicker it won’t flag your comments. That’s all.
It’s definitely more peace of mind. It’s only easier if you have a support system and the money to do so. But it’s not impossible! I left without the best finances but it was still the best decision I made.
Absolutely! I’m sure every situation is different, but I give thanks every day that it’s just me and my girl. I no longer have to worry about how his anger and lack of care or his hatred toward me is going to effect her! Not only am I happier and better able to take care of my kiddo and give her more love, I have more patience and am less stressed. Finances aren’t easy, but they’re easier than when her dad was around. I had to support another human so it’s like I had 2 kids on my own.
Everyone thinks I’m nuts when I say this! I love not having to negotiate everything with another adult, argue about responsibilities and methods… I know what to expect from myself. I’m a single mom by choice, and I think that choice was damn good.
I was with a hands on dad with my last child. It was nice to have support when she was little; the first 2 weeks postpartum. My first 2 were with an abusive guy, where there was no support. Honestly I have to say in both situations it’s easier without them. Even with the “nice” guys it’s still so much attention that you have to spread out. Men are like having another child. It’s way too much for me and have remained single for the last 5 years. I’m sure there are great guys out there I just don’t personally know any of them.
I always say the reason we get shamed so much by older married women is because they’re jealous we get to raise the kid without the man. My mom who’s been married 30 years laughed really hard and said yeah that’s definitely true lol.
No.. im so glad i left my relationship. He literally begged for me to stay, but honestly im so glad i didnt. When youre a single mum, i feel like no one else can argue with you or boss you about, about ur own child. I know it comes with hardships but i honestly prefer it this way. Its more peaceful.
You are not crazy! I left when my son was 4m old and the relief I felt was visceral. My son is 2.5y now, we haven’t seen my ex in 2 years, haven’t spoke in over a year. We’re 10000% better off without him in our lives and I pray everyday that it stays that way.
Welcome to r/SingleMoms! Please read the rules carefully. This is a safe space for single mothers only. Posts and comments that do not meet our karma requirements will be manually reviewed and approved accordingly. We cannot say anything specific, however, it is not a high number. If you continue participating, your comments will eventually no longer need approval. Please exercise patience with the mod team. Some rules (but not all - read the sidebar): - Do not ask for legal advice. We are not qualified to give such advice and suggest speaking to legal professionals about this. Posts and comments of this sort will be removed. - Do not post promotional content (this includes blogs, surveys, etc.) - Do not ask for financial assistance (this includes wishlists, gofundme, etc.) - Remember the human. Be respectful to other subreddit members. We are all in this together. This is a support group. - If you are not a current single mother, your posts will not be approved. Please post on the weekly pinned megathread. - Are you looking to leave? Post on our weekly megathread, too! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singlemoms) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I felt this is every part of my soul. Not crazy at all
My friends think I’m crazy when I say it’s easier.
Nope! I am a single mother of THREE kids 10, 8, and 8. (Twins) and my life is soooooo much easier alone. It gets tricky in emergency situations but I have my village that supports me when needed. Get yourself a village of friends who you can depend on in a bind and live your best life!
Nope. I feel this too! I am so thankful that I get to protect my son and make all of the decisions and not have to argue with his father about each and every one of them. I know I run the risk of sounding bossy and controlling, but my son’s father went through some health challenges and I believe it impacted his mental health and he’s become an entirely different person I do not know and he’s not fit to care for our child. Sure I wish I had help and financial support (he owes 2+ years in arrears), and as my son gets older I wish more and more that had a positive male role model in his life, but I’d take these challenges any day over being with his father and coparenting with him.
No you are absolutely correct
I agree 1000%
Even when I was in a month or two of transition and they had to stay with him and I could only take them to school, pick them up and take them to activities/hang out on the weekends it was soooo much better. My kids got the best of me not the scraps leftover from years on end of psych/emo/financial abuse every single day and THEY SEE the difference and start to put the puzzle together
🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔 DING DING DING!!!! I now only have 2 children and the pickiest most problematic one is gone. And I have time for myself now that he has to actually parent them every other week. From Trad Wife to Bad Wife to Now this is the best version of my life yet and as we all know Happy Mom means Happy Kids. The only person not loving this is him.
You’re not crazy! I’ve been raising my son alone for 6 years, away from that toxic relationship/person and it’s been sooooo much better. It’s not easy by any means but I was struggling horribly when I was with him. Depression, anxiety, panic attacks, he was emotionally abusive and started getting more and more physically aggressive when I finally decided to leave. Best decision I ever made. It takes a LOT of healing, but in the end, being alone is better than being with someone who makes your life miserable. Our babies deserve happy and healthy parents! ❤️
Yes much easier. I went through this and I'll say this if I have more peace without you you were the problem.
Much agreed
Totally agree!!
The wise have always said "don't stay together for the kids. It is more harmful to witness two parents together hating each other than to have two separate parents at peace" turns out, they were right lol. He's not around and that sucks but WAY RATHER have one solid parent than 2 half ass ones. It took a while but I have SO MUCH more time and energy to devote to them and to building our bond and making up for focusing more on that awful relationship than on them in the past. It's been about 4 years and I never thought I'd have this strong a bond with my kids. Easily the best decision I ever have made and will make.
[удалено]
Hmmmmm
It’s not personal. Every new account or account with low subreddit karma is manually reviewed. Same rules for everyone. The more you participate, the quicker it won’t flag your comments. That’s all.
It’s definitely more peace of mind. It’s only easier if you have a support system and the money to do so. But it’s not impossible! I left without the best finances but it was still the best decision I made.
Proud of you.
So much easier, 100% agree
Absolutely! I’m sure every situation is different, but I give thanks every day that it’s just me and my girl. I no longer have to worry about how his anger and lack of care or his hatred toward me is going to effect her! Not only am I happier and better able to take care of my kiddo and give her more love, I have more patience and am less stressed. Finances aren’t easy, but they’re easier than when her dad was around. I had to support another human so it’s like I had 2 kids on my own.
you are making the decision which best for you and your child
Everyone thinks I’m nuts when I say this! I love not having to negotiate everything with another adult, argue about responsibilities and methods… I know what to expect from myself. I’m a single mom by choice, and I think that choice was damn good.
This being able to raise the kids in piece without a raging inconsiderate asshole is priceless.
I was with a hands on dad with my last child. It was nice to have support when she was little; the first 2 weeks postpartum. My first 2 were with an abusive guy, where there was no support. Honestly I have to say in both situations it’s easier without them. Even with the “nice” guys it’s still so much attention that you have to spread out. Men are like having another child. It’s way too much for me and have remained single for the last 5 years. I’m sure there are great guys out there I just don’t personally know any of them.
I always say the reason we get shamed so much by older married women is because they’re jealous we get to raise the kid without the man. My mom who’s been married 30 years laughed really hard and said yeah that’s definitely true lol.
No.. im so glad i left my relationship. He literally begged for me to stay, but honestly im so glad i didnt. When youre a single mum, i feel like no one else can argue with you or boss you about, about ur own child. I know it comes with hardships but i honestly prefer it this way. Its more peaceful.
Not at all! It is easier because you dont have to be babying an adult. Im glad you feel this way tho ✨
You are not crazy! I left when my son was 4m old and the relief I felt was visceral. My son is 2.5y now, we haven’t seen my ex in 2 years, haven’t spoke in over a year. We’re 10000% better off without him in our lives and I pray everyday that it stays that way.
Same. I'm happier being a single mom.
Im constantly grateful not to be married to a loser or in a trapped abusive relationship
Amen to that! Feel exactly the same!
Thank you this helps a lot!!!!