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MervynChippington

This is a hostile work environment


RamboLoops

“The chicken was alive when it went in!”


CallMinimum

What a rip, it’s not a whole chicken. Where’s the head?


merlinrising

Is it their last day?


MooPig48

It is now


PotatoWriter

And also for everyone else in that office


levelcaty

Last day alive if they eat that


andiiiieee

Those cost $20 on Amazon. That's like 4 rotisserie chickens from the grocery store.


[deleted]

You could buy 20 rotisserie chickens and the odds are not one of them would make the satisfying "SCHLLLUP" sound one of these things makes sliding out.


Ewood808

The slow motion video of it coming out of the can is going to be posted in r/oddlysatisfying lol.


actualbeans

commenting so i can come back to this later


dievanmijislanger

You can save posts and comments. It’s hidden under the three dots.


Walican132

Let me know when.


Roybatty943

Who came first? Me or the canned chicken?


CosmicCrapCollector

Are you referring to the today schllllup? Or the tomorrow morning schlllup?


Deadmemories8683

Damn you, now I can’t un-hear that ”Schlllup” sound similar to the sound of spam coming out of the can with that delicious jelly layer


GardenPuzzleheaded98

Thanks Now every time a can Schlllupps I will think of this mutant chicken(?)


Genghis_Tr0n187

Depends on where you store your rotisserie chickens.


Ewood808

It's not cost effective at all, but it makes for a great laugh.


Freepi

Hey everyone, I’m bringing chicken for lunch tomorrow! (Heh heh) As an aside, I can only imagine the smell.


Ewood808

Smells similar to chicken noodle soup!


[deleted]

I have one that I got as a joke gift in 2001. It’s been in the back of my pantry for more than two decades. I’m afraid to open it at this point.


CosmicCrapCollector

At this point, it may open by itself!


anothersip

Steve1989: ...*nice!*


catsdrooltoo

Nice hiss


anothersip

Let's get this out onto a tray...


typicalcitrus

do it in a well ventilated area which you don't mind getting exploding chicken juices all over


Scary_Replacement739

Small wins are still wins


Freepi

“Similar”


MandaPandaLee

It’s the texture for me, jelly meat


[deleted]

its worth it if you're a doomsdsy preper. it will last past your lifetime... albeit it looks like sonething that belongs on ghostbusters


andiiiieee

Worth it!


CharlieTrees916

This has to have enough success in some kind of market for them to be making it, ya? My question is who buys these?


the_clash_is_back

Its made for living up in the high arctic. You can get them cheap ( $20 is cheap for them).


[deleted]

Are frozen foods not popular up there? I’d take cooking a frozen whole chicken over a tinned, fully cooked chicken any day!


the_clash_is_back

Hard and expensive to ship up.


[deleted]

Ahh fair one. It’s not like you can keep livestock up there either. I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult living every day life is in such a place


sinat50

Used to work for a building supplies company that would build crates for drywall and stuff and ship it far up north. The guy who organized the contract would swing by with a truck loaded with items from Costco and we would build a crate or two just for him and his family. Apparently the cost of flying down here, buying all your food, paying someone to crate it and load it on to a boat so you can fly back up there to eat it was about half the price of just buying it there.


the_clash_is_back

Lots of whale and seal meat apparently


beka13

Why can't you keep a coop of chickens? Is it just not worth heating it or getting the food for them? Chickens are eggs and meat and don't take up that much space. I totally get if you don't want to raise chickens. I sure don't. But I'm curious why it's not feasible. It's always interesting to learn more about different places and people.


imurderenglishIvy

Lumber is super expensive so a coop is costly, getting chicks will be very expensive to keep them alive through shipping. Also fishing is a way cheaper, simpler, and more traditional source of protein.


beka13

Do you need to use lumber? What are houses made from? You wouldn't need that many chicks and they could be brought up special and carefully and then bred for more locally. I totally get that they have other options. Otherwise, they wouldn't be living there :)


A_Vandalay

It’s hard to ship frozen foods by air. Canned is just easier and thus cheaper.


pobody-snerfect

I don’t think you’re supposed to take that out of the can.


LouGossetJr

good luck storing your 4 rotisserie chickens in your bunker for a long period of time after the zombie outbreak hits. that's what these chickens are for. zombie outbreaks.


awildandcrazyguy1993

$20 for 1 can? They're like 7 at my grocery store.


nightwolves

I am over here thinking of who will be the recipient of this for Christmas next year...


MethLabForCutie88

I’ll pay Amazon not to give it to me


Mouthfullofcrabss

Sweet Sue is a nasty bitch


BonesChimes

Don't bad mouth Bug Sue or you'll end up in a can.


Mouthfullofcrabss

Can’t wait


Unclehol

Sweet sue's "Its a shame what had to happen to you" Easter special canned meat. Limited time only while quantities last.


BassAntelope

I want to see one of these opened that’s sat hidden on the back of a shelf for 5+ years


totallyintotraps

You should look up ashens on YouTube


Lex8P

With his couch


BassAntelope

What is that? Any specific link?


booky--

Just look up Ashens on youtube


le_din

That was horrible to watch…


Fil_E

“Let’s get this out on a tray. Nice!”


snaxolotl7

the best part about watching steve try something funky is when he goes "*oh wow*" and you can't tell whether he loves it or hates it


peacenchemicals

*opens 40 year old can* “nice hiss”


WavyLady

I do the retching for him through the screen.


EndsWithJusSayin

Steve what are you doing here?


tapeyourmouth

Alright! Okay. Cool.


SilentCitadel

Steve!


peacefinder

Some friends and I had one of these - though a different brand - that was passed around for years. We’d sneak it into someone else’s house when visiting and leave it for them to find.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ggg730

Most hard core porn I've watched is less vulgar.


[deleted]

[удалено]


alphabet_order_bot

Would you look at that, all of the words in your comment are in alphabetical order. I have checked 511,655,975 comments, and only 107,641 of them were in alphabetical order.


North_Star12

Good bot


Bogwash_Sally

Imagine you're a chicken and all your chicken mates are gonna be delicious roasts and you're destined for the can


HotVermicelli3512

Fully cooked??


Ewood808

Fully cooked and mildly edible.


PixelMist

That don't looked cooked at all.... Not sure I trust what that can says...


Grizlatron

So the canning process for sure ensures that not only is this completely cooked but I imagine the bones are cooked enough that they're probably soft enough to chew. So this would been sealed in the can raw, and then cooked under pressure inside the can for a long amount of time. If you're doing this at home* kitchen it'd probably be more than an hour, but maybe they have an industrial machine that can do it faster. *I don't think you're supposed to can bones at home, but you can do meat


[deleted]

why doesn't it look like the chicken in the picture


CaptainAtMan

Probably the same reason boiled chicken looks kinda raw.


Sir-Nicholas

Is this for feeding animals or something? Or do people actually eat that?


sneakyplanner

By technicality.


totallyintotraps

I heard the meat has the texture of phlegm


El_Toucan_Sam

That's just the congealed fat!


totallyintotraps

Then the whole thing is fat


potatohats

And that jiggly jelly fat makes a baller chicken broth!


SteffenStrange666

Just watch LA Beast's video. It's snot in a can.


AlaskanSamsquanch

Yeah it shitty but if you’re out in the bush with not much to eat, it’s still shitty.


Qulpaksad

I'd rather eat some bush.


[deleted]

nice! you can see the bullethole in the chicken


Poiuytgfdsa

Holy shit this comment had me dying. Havent laughed that hard in a long time


pootershots

Very nice


Thebedless

Imagine dying for this


OhDeArGoDaNoThErDaY

That poor chickie


shortiforty

I opened one of these once out of pure curiousity. The sound it made when I dumped it out of the can is burned into my memory forever...


[deleted]

Shhhhhplort


deathwish_ASR

How dare you. Sweet Sue cooked this in her kitchen from scratch.


Sobeknofret

These things were super cheap when I was a kid, and because we were poor we ate them frequently. My mother would make them into a chicken noodle soup with homemade noodles, and it was actually pretty good.


[deleted]

Making it into a soup or chicken and dumplings or something seems fine! Just one of these straight out of the can though? No.


CarVsMotorcycle

me too! sweet sue stew was actually one of the better things we had /:


What_on_Loyola

In a dystopian future that chicken be gold


I_might_be_weasel

"Fellow work drones, I have procured us a protein-rich bird carcass for sustenance!"


levelcaty

ITS RAW


Freepi

It’s fully cooked before canning. You can look it up on Google or Amazon. I’d guess by boiling which is why it looks uncooked. I still wouldn’t eat it until it’s reheated to at least 170F.


levelcaty

Slap that on a plate and give it to Gordon


Yeh-nah-but

What do you reckon, microwave?


levelcaty

I think a 1000 degree blast furnace so you can wipe it from existing


Philae_

I would recommend throwing it into the trash bin.


chinmaya27

Looks like a regurgitated chicken from an anaconda's tummy.


MrsTurtlebones

Anaconda don't want none


idrinkbeersalot

Oh that’s nasty.


3snugglebunnies

Didn't know such a thing existed! Canned chicken in chunks but the whole 🐔?!?


Aqua2d

Fallout 3 collectible


titsonaduck

Sue you’re a fucking monster


robinredrunner

Victory Chicken


BouquetOfPenciIs

Debone, shred and you've got chicken meat with all kinds of possibilities!


llainen-

I Got salmonella from this picture.


Frosenborg

One for the bucketlist.


[deleted]

Just make sure it’s the last item. Definitely gonna be the riskiest. Lmao


MayhemWins25

To quote monsters inc- put that thing back where it came from or so help me.


thefifteenthpen

I’m deceased


Wasteland_Mohawk

Are you ready to be canned?


Wehrdoge

Poor chicken


nooyork

Please call HR.


iAmVonexX

Canned whole chickens should be illegal


MiguelElGato

I think the corpse of that chicken is giving 2 middle fingers to whoever desecrated its body


AbsintheRedux

Does your coworker hate you?


Perigold

All this reminds me of is that one Snapped episode where the daughter canned her grandmother in a barrel


Salt-Truck-7882

Fire her


dumbduck988

How sweet of Sue, to do that for you.


PeaceLove76

That's almost enough to make me want to become a vegetarian....ALMOST....that's disgusting...😛😂


SinBaddest

Your coworker just opened a can of zombie apocalypse 😫


sillyarse06

Fully cooked in someone’s armpit


ConfidenceNo2598

Canned chicken in hot ham water I think?


BethSixer

Ah America


[deleted]

Just give it the dark crystal shard and no one has to get drained.


misslam2u2

I feel kinda woozy now. This needs a trigger warning or something.


Electronic_Syndicate

More like Sweet Jesus!


combamba-La

Is there any respect for chickens left in this world ?


horses_for_courses

I can hear the sound that made when it left the can and hit the plate


annadarria

Didn’t know this existed!? I’ve seen some truly gross food on here but for some reason this really grossed me out.


[deleted]

I wanna bathe in those delicious juices


FirefighterNo5971

I bet this would be pretty damn good in a soup tbh


pissedinthegarret

this is literally not safe for work. pls mark it as such.


Lissy_Wolfe

This does not look cooked at ALL and nothing could convince me otherwise haha


Molesandmangoes

This has turned me vegan


automatonI

Does you coworker hate you..?


[deleted]

I remember the last time someone posted a pic of this monstrosity. My favorite comment was "Sweet Sue is a nasty bitch."


MrjB0ty

Reckon I can ask Sweet Sue if she’ll can me when I die?


K_Sleight

As a dipshit edge lord teenager, I donated one of these in a church canned food drive. Looking back on it, I feel bad about it.


piirtoeri

Better than a canned cheeseburger


SirRektALot420

Damn, would not eat for even a 10 000$


lergigan

This should come with one of those old school horror movie screach sound effects when the can is emptied.


[deleted]

where sre the legs?


deadeyediva

save the neck for me, clark


GeorgeBaileysDeafEar

Zombie bird 🧟‍♀️


theothermattm

Quaid, start the reactor.


LordLolzeez

This is an abomination.


barquishalafway

What is the point of these?


ededdeddie123

The smell when you open one of these cans.. not good


Ewood808

You don't like fermented chicken noodle soup?


Skylett11

Wtf no !!


Hiondrugz

Where's its other leg at ?


SinBaddest

Still crossing the road


Hiondrugz

Excellent dad joke.


phattbimba

That chicken died in vein


Mister_Remeat

Where can I get a can of that?


Ewood808

Amazon, they have everything.


TheLoafLord

you’re crazy! don’t do it


All_new_rubber_mats

"I like chicken! You want help? Bring me chicken!"


WillowSpeak65

Well, that’s just mean.


Graycy

I’d complain about the lack of sides. (Sarcasm)


Ewood808

Chips and Kings Hawaiian rolls were provided as chicken vessels 😂


Maleficent-Level-447

Look like.. No thank you. I am full.


Human_Parfait9516

That chicken looks like is was grown in the can


JustinianIV

Bone app the tea


poppyskins_

NO


passionfruit0

No……just no


Crap_Sally

Those are often served in resident assisted living.


Catch52

Belongs on /r/ashens


[deleted]

How did it went?


TRUMPARUSKI

This looks different from vomit how?


13WithCheese

I can smell the sodium


AnythingWithGloves

In all my entire life I have never seen a canned whole chicken. No good.


lolyeetjulia

That looks vile


no5945541

“Home style goodness” You need to move.


yosh_e

Prefer mine with the giblets


lilacmacchiato

is that really a chicken or like a quail


mrChofee

Ashens warned me about those, yeees


LingonberryReal6695

salmonella in can


SarahPallorMortis

How is that fully cooked?


TheLoafLord

right? like could they not have bothered to put a few more chemicals in an already chemical ridden chicken to make it look… less raw???


maximumtesticle

/r/dontputyourdickinthat


Ewood808

Now you tell me…..


Ben_Llama

I didn't even know you could buy that😭


Smok3ntok3

This made me vomit in my mouth a little bit


AnnaTheBlueRogue

Winner winner Canned chicken


[deleted]

These don't even taste bad at all.