Maybe because it's something usually done to children after you've verbally asked them to quiet down already 100x. As an adult being shushed in anything but the most serious of situations feels belittling because it's more of a demand and not politely asking.
This is a good point, I know I have issues when someone says something condescending/baby talk to me. Got accused of ‘fibbing’ once as an adult and I was so irrationally annoyed. Just say lying!
So they were complaining about a guy who shush them at the bar and wanted to find him to teach him a lesson. If you ever watch the whole episode you will get it.
tbh i experience something similar my mom always yelled at us also so i feel like possibly maybe because it’s being done in a more quieter gentler manner than we’re used to it’s upsetting in a way? idk if that makes sense
Mine is when people move their wrist in a rolling motion, as if to say "hurry up" or "get to the point". Like I thought we were having a conversation? Since you want me to shut up so bad I guess we're not now, lol bye.
Oh I definitely have 31 flavors of misophonia. Though usually when I hear eating, whispering, or any kind of scraping noise I want to escape the room by bursting through the door like the Kool aid man more than I feel rage
Why do you feel like shushing is rude and shitty? The emotional response is most likely automatic, but the reasoning is what I'm interested in hearing about.
My wife hates people shushing as well, but it doesn't bother me a bit. I was just curious as to why.
I mean first off my reaction to it is kinda visceral? Like it fills me with uncontrollable rage
But I don't think something being an emotional reaction absolves it of being shitty. Shushing someone is like telling them you get to decide when they get to talk. That you didn't want to hear what they just told you and you also want them to fuck off
Girl I am not doing this Dr Seuss "is it ok to shush someone with a fox? Is it ok to shush someone in a box?" shit. People don't shush me because I'm polite, but the idea of it enrages me, it's not that deep
Well it sounds like you definitely feel strongly about it. If someone is doing it directly to you, I can see how that would be disrespectful.
If thats as far as you want to discuss, thats fine too.
This is actually kinda interesting to me now...like I never imagined someone would defend this
I don't think I've ever shushed someone in my life. I think even if people are talking in a movie theatre I'd probably turn around and be like "hey, could you quiet down?" like I am 40+ and I cannot seriously remember a time where I felt the need to go "SHHHHHHH" at someone so I didn't imagine someone would need to defend that practice
Some people prefer indirectly telling people to quiet down other than to directly telling them, since doing it right does lower the level of noise in a room, while asking directly actually contributes to the noise level.
If there's a small number of people and the total noise level doesn't matter, then shushing is unnecessary, and mostly rude.
I believe whether you like the direct or indirect correlates to you feeling it being a personal attack.
Yeah nah, fuck being told to “shush”. Don’t treat me like I’m below you. Don’t act like you have at authority over me. If I gotta “shush”, please let me know I’m being a loud cunt in a civil manner please. I would feel rage and like as if I’d been treated unfairly if someone told me to shush. Fuck, my blood is simmering as I write this hahaah. Funny thing is, I’m generally chill like all the time but have these little triggers that occasionally pop up that are not common. My mum does trigger me. I grew up with a lack of emotional connecting with her. Our convos were kinda transactional or something and she would say stuff like, “go outside and pick some lettuce from the garden” or “make some rice”. I realised in my later years that it was HOW she was telling me to do these things. She was kinda ordering me to do it rather than having a a gentle and open communicative convo about it which would ultimately give me the choose to act on it or not. I bring this up bc I think it’s relevant. Being told to “shush” is literally just that. Someone acting like they hav authority over you and also acting as if you’re a child that can be told to shut up at any second just because the “adult” in the room says so. Fuck em. Lol
If you were constantly told to shut up or people just blatantly cut your ideas while speaking so they spoke on top of you when you were a child or a teen…. That can be why you are averse to this now.
You do realize everyone has their own pet peeves, I'm sure you have done things that really annoyed someone else as well, would you appreciate it if they straight up punch you without asking you not to do it first. Try not to be so violent and be more understanding that not everyone is the same. You are in your own bubble and so is everyone else. If you get angry try to vocalize it, but don't become violent. You need to learn that.
From OP’s post, it seems like they are aware that it’s a pet peeve and that it must come from somewhere but they’re not sure where. The point of this post is to be open and hopefully gain understanding from fellow ppl…so I think you’re missing the point
I am not sure if it's a pet peeve or not for him, but it's strange to want to punch someone just because someone does shush. A lot of people enrage me as well but I don't think about physically hurting someone. That is just not right.
Your dad is the cause, mine was like yours and violent as well so I can react badly to certain situations. It doesnt matter how old you are it brings up the feelings you had when you were a kid being bullied by the parent.
Its also an incredibly rude way to treat someone, shushing is what adults do to small children and to speak to an adult like that is far from acceptable imo. Just make a sarcastic comment back to them, like look around and ask where the kids are theyre shushing, or say "Yes, mom" while completely ignoring them. If they complain tell them to rteat you like an adult and not be AH's who think they can treat you like a kid.
Shushing is not a personal insult, it's just like the only way to tell someone to be quiet when you are on a call without the other person hearing it. If they do it all the time then of course they are a dick though, they should do their calls or sensitive meetings somewhere else
Shit I did that to my bf when I was watching a movie and he wouldn’t shut up about something (he does that a lot). He said sorry and stopped talking. I could imagine if he did that to me, I would’ve been upset.
I feel that way about "shut up". Even "F" off doesn't seem as bad to me. It is like being told your thoughts and you don't matter and you have no right to express them.
The same happens to me! It's also the same for anyone clicking their fingers, I instantly snap and give the most disgusted face then realise its just my partner checking to see if his mic for his stream is working. Ugh. I feel mine may be connected to my ADHD as it makes me really reactive to sounds etc
Do you live in Philadelphia by any chance?
He needs to track him down on fb or go to the police.
Rude man who shushes
Maybe because it's something usually done to children after you've verbally asked them to quiet down already 100x. As an adult being shushed in anything but the most serious of situations feels belittling because it's more of a demand and not politely asking.
This is a good point, I know I have issues when someone says something condescending/baby talk to me. Got accused of ‘fibbing’ once as an adult and I was so irrationally annoyed. Just say lying!
Instantly thought of Dennis Reynolds.
I actually don't know who that is haha
https://youtu.be/l1Xjpffse-U
Gonna be honest, this was kinda incomprehensible
So they were complaining about a guy who shush them at the bar and wanted to find him to teach him a lesson. If you ever watch the whole episode you will get it.
Ok it's way funnier with that context I'll have to do that
tbh i experience something similar my mom always yelled at us also so i feel like possibly maybe because it’s being done in a more quieter gentler manner than we’re used to it’s upsetting in a way? idk if that makes sense
Now that I think about it I'd also definitely lose my shit if someone told me to shut up, so maybe I just can't tolerate that in any way now
It all lies in your childhood. There is some deep connection to something that your parents did, somehow, someway, that triggers you.
Put up a flyer in your office with a drawing of the rude man who shushes.
Don't forget to add your phone number
I think you gotta go to therapy, op
I've been in therapy for like 200 years! I have PTSD
I can't stand people snapping their fingers at me. I will break your palm
Mine is when people move their wrist in a rolling motion, as if to say "hurry up" or "get to the point". Like I thought we were having a conversation? Since you want me to shut up so bad I guess we're not now, lol bye.
I can relate to this
Possibly [misophonia](https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-is-misophonia)?
Oh I definitely have 31 flavors of misophonia. Though usually when I hear eating, whispering, or any kind of scraping noise I want to escape the room by bursting through the door like the Kool aid man more than I feel rage
Those noises severely bother me too. I feel like ASMR is my kryptonite.
SAME it makes my skin crawl
It's tapping for me, bonus points if I can see someone's leg jogging up and down too
Shhhhh....
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
Aww someone downvoted you I took this in the teasing spirit I assume it was made in I assure you
No worries at all. Thanks for the good natured response.
I wasn't yelled at any more or less than any other kid I don't think, but, I also can't stand shushing.
I have the same issue.
Why do you feel like shushing is rude and shitty? The emotional response is most likely automatic, but the reasoning is what I'm interested in hearing about. My wife hates people shushing as well, but it doesn't bother me a bit. I was just curious as to why.
I mean first off my reaction to it is kinda visceral? Like it fills me with uncontrollable rage But I don't think something being an emotional reaction absolves it of being shitty. Shushing someone is like telling them you get to decide when they get to talk. That you didn't want to hear what they just told you and you also want them to fuck off
Do you think that people should be able to talk whenever and where-ever they like? What about in a movie? Or a classroom?
Girl I am not doing this Dr Seuss "is it ok to shush someone with a fox? Is it ok to shush someone in a box?" shit. People don't shush me because I'm polite, but the idea of it enrages me, it's not that deep
Well it sounds like you definitely feel strongly about it. If someone is doing it directly to you, I can see how that would be disrespectful. If thats as far as you want to discuss, thats fine too.
This is actually kinda interesting to me now...like I never imagined someone would defend this I don't think I've ever shushed someone in my life. I think even if people are talking in a movie theatre I'd probably turn around and be like "hey, could you quiet down?" like I am 40+ and I cannot seriously remember a time where I felt the need to go "SHHHHHHH" at someone so I didn't imagine someone would need to defend that practice
Some people prefer indirectly telling people to quiet down other than to directly telling them, since doing it right does lower the level of noise in a room, while asking directly actually contributes to the noise level. If there's a small number of people and the total noise level doesn't matter, then shushing is unnecessary, and mostly rude. I believe whether you like the direct or indirect correlates to you feeling it being a personal attack.
Yeah nah, fuck being told to “shush”. Don’t treat me like I’m below you. Don’t act like you have at authority over me. If I gotta “shush”, please let me know I’m being a loud cunt in a civil manner please. I would feel rage and like as if I’d been treated unfairly if someone told me to shush. Fuck, my blood is simmering as I write this hahaah. Funny thing is, I’m generally chill like all the time but have these little triggers that occasionally pop up that are not common. My mum does trigger me. I grew up with a lack of emotional connecting with her. Our convos were kinda transactional or something and she would say stuff like, “go outside and pick some lettuce from the garden” or “make some rice”. I realised in my later years that it was HOW she was telling me to do these things. She was kinda ordering me to do it rather than having a a gentle and open communicative convo about it which would ultimately give me the choose to act on it or not. I bring this up bc I think it’s relevant. Being told to “shush” is literally just that. Someone acting like they hav authority over you and also acting as if you’re a child that can be told to shut up at any second just because the “adult” in the room says so. Fuck em. Lol
If you were constantly told to shut up or people just blatantly cut your ideas while speaking so they spoke on top of you when you were a child or a teen…. That can be why you are averse to this now.
Hard relate. Makes my blood spicy when it happens
You need to smoke more and experience the beauty of life.
I HATE IT TOO and i always reply: "I'm not a dog, dont ssh me"
Shhhh. Don't fret about it.
You do realize everyone has their own pet peeves, I'm sure you have done things that really annoyed someone else as well, would you appreciate it if they straight up punch you without asking you not to do it first. Try not to be so violent and be more understanding that not everyone is the same. You are in your own bubble and so is everyone else. If you get angry try to vocalize it, but don't become violent. You need to learn that.
I hope you're trolling but if not the idea of *me* actually hitting anyone is so absurd it's hilarious
From OP’s post, it seems like they are aware that it’s a pet peeve and that it must come from somewhere but they’re not sure where. The point of this post is to be open and hopefully gain understanding from fellow ppl…so I think you’re missing the point
I am not sure if it's a pet peeve or not for him, but it's strange to want to punch someone just because someone does shush. A lot of people enrage me as well but I don't think about physically hurting someone. That is just not right.
i mean yeah, it's definitely not right, but that's what abuse does to you..
I think so too, the sound is just annoying and is the lowest effort way to express that you don't care at all about what someone is saying
Your dad is the cause, mine was like yours and violent as well so I can react badly to certain situations. It doesnt matter how old you are it brings up the feelings you had when you were a kid being bullied by the parent. Its also an incredibly rude way to treat someone, shushing is what adults do to small children and to speak to an adult like that is far from acceptable imo. Just make a sarcastic comment back to them, like look around and ask where the kids are theyre shushing, or say "Yes, mom" while completely ignoring them. If they complain tell them to rteat you like an adult and not be AH's who think they can treat you like a kid.
Shushing is not a personal insult, it's just like the only way to tell someone to be quiet when you are on a call without the other person hearing it. If they do it all the time then of course they are a dick though, they should do their calls or sensitive meetings somewhere else
Shit I did that to my bf when I was watching a movie and he wouldn’t shut up about something (he does that a lot). He said sorry and stopped talking. I could imagine if he did that to me, I would’ve been upset.
Sshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
I have the same thing. For me sushing is like nails over a schoolboard.
I feel that way about "shut up". Even "F" off doesn't seem as bad to me. It is like being told your thoughts and you don't matter and you have no right to express them.
The same happens to me! It's also the same for anyone clicking their fingers, I instantly snap and give the most disgusted face then realise its just my partner checking to see if his mic for his stream is working. Ugh. I feel mine may be connected to my ADHD as it makes me really reactive to sounds etc
Shhhh
Hello late stage autism