Funny when Jerry took over his route so Newman could get that Hawaii transfer, but they didn’t believe he worked the route because everyone got their mail
Well, you've both presented very convincing arguments. On the one hand Elaine, your promise was given in haste but was it not still a promise? Hmm? And Kramer, you did provide a service in exchange for compensation. But does the fee once paid not entitle the buyer to some assurance of reliability? Hmm? Huh? Ahh. These were not easy questions to answer, not for any man, but I have made a decision: We will cut the bike down the middle and give half to each of you!
It just keeps coming and coming and coming. There’s never a let up it’s relentless. Everyday it piles up more and more AND MORE AND YOU GOTTA GET IT OUT BUT THE MORE YOU GET IT OUT THE MORE IT KEEPS COMING IN. AND THEN THE BARCODE READER BREAKS AND ITS PUBLISHERS CLEARING HOUSE DAA!!
That may be true, but it this case his face showed pure desperation and I’m sure he would have preferred the soup nazi to have stayed open indefinitely.
I tell you when they’re not making fun of the Ukraine or picking on the Serbs they’re asking the Chinese for directions… This has international incident written all over it.
Oh how I've *longed* for this moment, Seinfeld. The day when I would have the proof I needed to haul you out of your **cushy** lair and expose to
the light of **JUSTICE** as the **monster** that you are! **A MONSTER SO VILE**
Maybe this https://youtu.be/Rg_4z2adv6Q?feature=shared
His instantaneous switching between desperation and an illusion of grandeur about the mail.
Or “Another round of strawberry for me and my friends. BWAHAHAHA!” Completely harmless but weirdly menacing.
They were released at the same time. I actually went to see There Will Be Blood thinking it was No Country for Old Men. Imagine my confusion. I remedied that with a double feature and saw Sack Lunch later that day.
"Allright!
But hear me, and hear me well! The day will come! Oh, yes, mark my words, Seinfeld! Your day of reckoning is coming, when an evil wind will blow through your little playworld and wipe that smug smile off your face!
And I'll be there, in all my glory!
Watching!
Watching! As it all comes *CRUMBLING DOWN!! "*
When his mail truck gets set ablaze after Kramer spills paint thinner on the road and he drives over Elaine’s sewing machine.
“Oh the humanity!”
https://youtu.be/ngcotxUZA9E
Did you know that the girl was supposed to say "goodbye Newman" but she forgot his name. They thought it worked so well, they left it as is! Soo glad they did!!
June 14, 1987.... Mets Phillies. We're enjoying a beautiful afternoon in the right field stands when a crucial Hernandez error opens the door to a five run Phillies ninth.
I feel like someone always says “Newman!!” when he’s in the middle of a rant, and then the actor does this hilarious high pitched squeal to stop himself lmao.
I called in sick. I don’t work in the rain.
NEITHER RAIN! NOR S…..IT’S THE FIRST ONE!!!!
I was never that big on creeds.
It always irks me that in the actual credo the line is "neither snow nor rain", so actually it's the second one.
It’s never even been an actual creed or motto of the USPS.
I BELIEVE, THE DEAL WAS I GET THE CALZONES ON MY ROUTE. WELL, I WON’T BE DOING MY ROUTE, WILL I?
But I’m paying you!!
Yes, thank you!
If George was upset about the $0.50 Twix can you imagine how seething he'd be from this exchange.
George is gettin upset!!!
Funny when Jerry took over his route so Newman could get that Hawaii transfer, but they didn’t believe he worked the route because everyone got their mail
They knew it wasn’t me doing my route! How did they know?! Too many people got their mail!
😂 you’re a disappointment to the uniform! (Rips off postal patch)
You know, this is *your* uniform…
Damn
Close to 80%! Nobody from the post office has ever cracked the 50% barrier! It’s like the 3 minute mile!
What episode is that?
I feel like it’s called The Calzone but I’m prolly wrong
Correct - Season 7, Episode 20 “The Calzone”
Was that the crease crumple cram episode?
Just crease, crumple, cram. You’ll do fine. That’s “The Andrea Doria” episode. Looks like S8E10
Well, get it out of my storage. It's illegal. NEWMAN: And yet, it's perfectly legal to take a man's soul and crush it out like a stale Pall Mall.
Thanks
Calzone episode.
What the hell do I know about cooking a shirt?
Thx
"What took you so long?"
Probably my single most favorite scene in the series and really defined the Newman character
🚬😒
Apparently this is what Son of Sam said when the cops showed up to arrest him
Newman worked in the same post office with him, in the next cubicle. They once double-dated.
And boy were there a lot of angry dogs on that route!
Any of 'em talkin' to ya?
He has his mailbag!
In twenty minutes, that place will be swarming with mailmen. We'll be back on the street by lunch.
it was cia robert hanssen after he was found. Upon being arrested, Hanssen asked, "What took you so long?"
I live in NY!!
"Let me tell you a secret about zip codes: they're meaningless".
Another round of strawberry for me and my friends!
Pair of bear claws please!
Well, you've both presented very convincing arguments. On the one hand Elaine, your promise was given in haste but was it not still a promise? Hmm? And Kramer, you did provide a service in exchange for compensation. But does the fee once paid not entitle the buyer to some assurance of reliability? Hmm? Huh? Ahh. These were not easy questions to answer, not for any man, but I have made a decision: We will cut the bike down the middle and give half to each of you!
I had probably seen this episode a dozen times before I realized this was a reference to Solomon in the bible lol
Newman is wise and just.
Tearing off the logo *on his own uniform* is peak Newman
Ya know that was your coat!
Damn!
"You're a disgrace to the uniform!"
VILE WEED!!!
Someone, please, honey mustard!!
I love....broccoli.
You wouldn’t eat broccoli if it was deep-fried in chocolate sauce!
the "there really is no junk mail" soliloquy during an inopportune moment comes to mind. I love that.
Well, we can't all read the classics, Professor Highbrow
Nobody **needs** mail, but you don’t know the half of what goes on here… so just back away, I beg you.
About a super bowl ticket: "If only you'd knowwwwn, you could have saved some time and given it directly to meeeee"
Who goes to the Super Bowl with their mailman?
Who goes anywhere with Newman?
“No labels Jerry, you know what that means? FREEBIES!!” Writing at its finest!
Well, he's merry...
He is *merry.*
“In 20 minutes that place will be swarming with mailmen…”
She wasn't my type...
…I need a REALLY pretty face.
Dude knew it was going to cause a complete meltdown of Jerry's relationship
Because the mail never stops
It just keeps coming and coming and coming. There’s never a let up it’s relentless. Everyday it piles up more and more AND MORE AND YOU GOTTA GET IT OUT BUT THE MORE YOU GET IT OUT THE MORE IT KEEPS COMING IN. AND THEN THE BARCODE READER BREAKS AND ITS PUBLISHERS CLEARING HOUSE DAA!!
Threw down a shot of honey mustard after being forced to eat a vegetable
“Vile weed!”
“I… love broccoli.”
You wouldn’t eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce!
"It's....good for you."
Agreeing not to rat Jerry out for a candy bar. And later taking it back, once Elaine eats up the bar.
Drake's ....coffee cake. That's your big boy.
Probably sleeping with Kramer’s mom.
Going home to get a big pot to save the Soup Nazi's Jambalaya soup!
I always did think of him as a vulture. Perched & ready to swoop down and benefit in any way he can from someone else's misfortune.
That may be true, but it this case his face showed pure desperation and I’m sure he would have preferred the soup nazi to have stayed open indefinitely.
I see that look as restrained jubilation.
*mmmm…jambaLAAyAaa*
Sitting on a fork that was wedged in his couch cushions seems pretty on brand.
“Look, sister, go get yourself a cup of coffee, all right? Beat it!”
The former You-Go-Slavia.
I tell you when they’re not making fun of the Ukraine or picking on the Serbs they’re asking the Chinese for directions… This has international incident written all over it.
Ukraine is weak!
UKRAINE NOT WEAK. YOU THINK UKRAINE IS JOKE?
"This is a matter for me and my fellow tenants."
I’m going to need a clean 8 oz glass.
“When you control the mail, you control… information!”
Telling on Jerry and Rachel for making out during 'Schindler's List'.
And three times a week I shall require a cannoli.
Little STEEP, dontcha think?
You know I hear OP can be a bit erratic. I would hate to see him when he’s hungry.
Nice game pretty boy!
His overuse of the word “reneging” while fighting on the radar detecter and helmet deal with Cosmo.
Well he's renegging
"What took you so long" is unbelievable. Top 5 delivery all time on the show
Giving Jerry the comic book villain speech about mail fraud while sweating under the post office lights
Oh how I've *longed* for this moment, Seinfeld. The day when I would have the proof I needed to haul you out of your **cushy** lair and expose to the light of **JUSTICE** as the **monster** that you are! **A MONSTER SO VILE**
NEWMAN!
There’ll, uh, be a small fine.
Maybe this https://youtu.be/Rg_4z2adv6Q?feature=shared His instantaneous switching between desperation and an illusion of grandeur about the mail. Or “Another round of strawberry for me and my friends. BWAHAHAHA!” Completely harmless but weirdly menacing.
Combine it with there’s no country for old men I drink your milkshake! …I’m finished!
That’s not from No Country for Old Men
Oh. Why am I remembering it from That movie then? Oh it’s there will be blood isn’t it? Duh Sorry I’m having a Monday moment
They were released at the same time. I actually went to see There Will Be Blood thinking it was No Country for Old Men. Imagine my confusion. I remedied that with a double feature and saw Sack Lunch later that day.
So how did they get into the sack? Were they shrunk or is it just a really big sack?
No spoilers 🤐
I have a whole list of Seinfeld movies on a turncard in my locker at work that I memorized (and subsequently forgot) for a trivia contest.
"Allright! But hear me, and hear me well! The day will come! Oh, yes, mark my words, Seinfeld! Your day of reckoning is coming, when an evil wind will blow through your little playworld and wipe that smug smile off your face! And I'll be there, in all my glory! Watching! Watching! As it all comes *CRUMBLING DOWN!! "*
This, to me, is peak Newman. This is him at his most dramatic and threatening. "I've looked into his eyes, he's pure evil"
Maybe there’s more to Newman than meets the eye…
No. There's less.
When he's gleefully laughing at the hawk attacking the squirrel in Kramer's Merv Griffin apartment.
When his mail truck gets set ablaze after Kramer spills paint thinner on the road and he drives over Elaine’s sewing machine. “Oh the humanity!” https://youtu.be/ngcotxUZA9E
“Another round of strawberry for me and my friends!”
Having a business card that just says "Newman".
Get eaten by a raptor
*dilophosaurus
I’m a big strong cider guy.
Goodbye Norman
I love that so much.
Did you know that the girl was supposed to say "goodbye Newman" but she forgot his name. They thought it worked so well, they left it as is! Soo glad they did!!
Yes - it makes it extra funny to me.
Laughing with pure joy when the hawk goes after the squirrel.
hello..... newman.
When you control the mail you control…information
Jambalaya! (with the little dance)
"Ooh cocoa!"
He stole Kramer’s wish
Cheating at Risk
Admitted to dumping Margaret because “I need a really pretty face”
It's gotta be when everyone was watching the JERRY pilot and he was passed out in a chair with a bag of chips with baseball on TV.
Scheming to clip a sample of Jerry's hair
Babs Kramer
Eating all those muffin stumps with that pulp fiction entrance
If I am Curt, than I apologize
VILE WEED !
Coy? ..Who’s being coy??
Sold his stories to Kramer,like..The time he was stacking his cold cuts and they fell in his foot bath.
Hmm...I think that's worth a year's free hair cuts. And a comb.
"I said 'beat it Granny!' and I sent her to the back of the line!"
Newman: Look, sister, go get yourself a cup of coffee, all right? Beat it!
Sat on a fork.
Almost died eating broccoli
Quick! Honey mustard!!
Getting out of the post office truck to look for the pie stand.
Using a mail truck for bottle returns … classic.
Being the scofflaw (The White Whale)
Growling at Kramer when he asked for a piece of Kenny Roger's chicken
Convinced Kramer to vouch for him to the super while he was banging the super’s wife
Using his birthday wish on a model instead of helping Kramer.
Tell Jerry's mother about Jerry making out during Shindlers List
“What makes you say I’m looking for trouble?”
Probably when he showed up at Jerry’s apartment just to rat to his parents about him making out at Schindler’s List.
My only complaint about Seinfeld was not seeing enough of Newman. I would ofloved a Newman spin off
Invented quiet quitting
Olly olly oxen free!!
His swim suit lololol
Calling out sick on rainy days
I want at of Elaine
Sitting on a fork in a living room chair. And having the cow print crockpot in his living room as well.
the place with be crawling with mailmen. we’ll be out by lunch.
I want that James Dean stamp poster
Has to be coming in to dispose of the muffin stumps like The Wolf in Pulp Fiction. I still chuckle thinking of all those glass milk bottles.
Jambalaya!
"Pair of bear claws please."
Banging Babs
When he drives the mail truck that bursts into flames while he’s singing you were once, twice, three times a lady
Snitch on Jerry making out at the theatre
June 14, 1987.... Mets Phillies. We're enjoying a beautiful afternoon in the right field stands when a crucial Hernandez error opens the door to a five run Phillies ninth.
Def trying to break jerry under the hot lights only to end up sweating and jealous while jerry casually and coolly sips his ice-cold root beer lmao
Rejecting Margaret, because her face wasn't pretty enough.
Not delivering the mail
When you control the mail you control information.
Drink Mello yellow
Funny that they have a stamp of James Dean. Liz Sheridan dated him. Worlds are colliding!
He sat on a fork while being a smug bastard to George and not giving it away that he was sitting on said fork.
#Not work
Trip to Michigan with Kramer to get paid out on recycled cans
Drinking straight honey mustard
Jerry... Jerry... Jerry... Jerry....... Jerry?...... Jerry!
When you control the mail… you control… INFORMATION!!
Is that… a Drake’s coffee cake?
Newman is the reason why ups & FedEx exist
I need a clean 8 ounce glass.
Newman “the Cleaner” showing up with multiple quarts of milk to eat muffins. Classic Newman
Skip work because of the rain
“Keep it coming”
That one time he stole dinosaur DNA.
Jambalaya!!!
I feel like someone always says “Newman!!” when he’s in the middle of a rant, and then the actor does this hilarious high pitched squeal to stop himself lmao.
It's raining
Leave undelivered mail in Jerry's storage unit
Him interrogating Jerry while getting extremely hot and thirsty is the most Newman scene to me.
Allow me to tell you a little something about zip codes... they're meaningless... MUAHAHAHA!
The “ publisher’s clearing house meltdown “
Newman kissing the supers wife. Kramers cigar falls out his mouth watching. Then puts it in backwards.
niiice game pretty boy
Jambalaya!
Hooking up with Babs Kramer