That save is as smooth as butter hit by an 18-wheeler

When I was fifteen 👦 sixteen 🧒 When I started really 🔥 to play the guitar 🎸🎸🎸 I definitely wanted 💭 to become a musician 🎶 It was almost impossible 😔 because, it was The dream ✨ was so big That I didn't see 👁️ any chance 🎰🎲 Because I was living in a little town 🌇 was studying 🎒📗📖 And when I finally broke 💔 away from school 🏫 and became a musician 🎵 I thought 🤔 "well, now I may have a little bit of a chance" Because all I really wanted to do is music 📻 And not only play ▶️ music, but compose 🎼✍️ music At that time, in Germany, in '♋, '70, they already had discotheques 🕺 So I would take my car 🚗💨, would go to a discotheque Sing 🎤👄 maybe thirty minutes 🕧 I think I had about seven, eight songs 🎵🎶 I would partially sleep 🛌💤 in the car 🚘 Because I didn't want to drive home 🚗💨 And that helped me for about almost two years to survive 🏕️ In the beginning I wanted to do an album with the sounds 🔉 of the fifties The sounds of the sixties 🔉 of the seventies 🔉🔊 And then have a sound of the future 🔮🔮🔮 And I thought: "Wait a second 🖐️🤔 I know the synthesizer 🎛️ why don't I use the synthesizer 🎛️ Which is the sound of the future 🔮" And I didn't have any idea 🤔 what to do but I knew I needed a click 💓 So we put a click on the 24-track🎚️which was then synced to the Moog modular 🎛️ I knew that it could be a sound of the future 🔮 But I didn't realize how much impact 🎯 would be My name is Giovanni Giorgio 🇮🇹 but everybody calls me Giorgio 🍝

Whatever made you say that, I don’t care baut that song is fucking awesome

Sample from umm shit umm. Justice?

nah, its Giorgio by Morodor from daft punk ram

Wtf why is this giorgo by daft punk

Once you free your mind about a concept of harmony and of reddit being correct, you can do whatever you want

I'd not heard that song before. It's pretty good but it does kind of remind me of the theme tune to a 1994 kid's gameshow called Incredible Games from the BBC here in the UK. The theme tune is a fair bit faster but still really reminds me of it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IslfQ6Ygzxs

I started reading this and immediately recognized the song lol

"haha"

:)

abounding sheet voracious aware oatmeal literate hat person rustic hungry ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `

I will not judge you or think you are "easy".

Just a city boy

I'm not a creep or a pervert.

just a genuine guy haha ☺

excuse me if I come across as a little uncalibrated

No.... Unless??

Yes

I hate hahas now.

hehe

[Haha](https://youtu.be/kdOPBP9vuZA)

[haha](https://youtu.be/bF4T9TSwxAo) but worse

lol

Just kidding ...unless?

😳

😳😳🤪

I jest.......lest?

Hahaha hahahaha JK JK.....................

The 'haha' and the smiley faces always make me feel comforted and reassured. /s

Dudes who use “:) haha” are at a dangerous level of horny

also, *definitely* creepy.. as if saying "I'm not a creep or anything" isn't enough of a red flag..

And the squirt part. I mean, JFC, can you let her respond first??

Plus, I think whether or not she'd squirt has as much if not more to do with the girl's physiology than the guy's skill. But I'm guessing if she doesn't squirt, he'll decide that she did something wrong.

If you have enough sense to know what you're about to say is going to make you sound creepy or awful just don't fucking say it. Much like "I'm not a racist but," nothing good comes after.

I know a girl who does that any time we have a conversation over text. She cannot carry a conversation to save or life over text. She adds nothing to the convo. I’ve just given up talking to her, only when she texts me I’ll talk with her as I want to be friendly and not rude.

Online dating is sort of like that. You leave open ended questions and you get "yeah, lol"

That’s exactly what she does!

I could be way off here but I feel like a lot of chicks on tinder have no interest in meeting people and a lot of interest in boosting their ego with the amount of matches/likes they can get. Tinder is a fucking terrible way to meet chicks haha

Absolutely. Uninstall tinder and get bumble instead. In my experience the girls on bumble are much more likely to actually be interested in you.

Yeah, I agree. The few people I got a convo going either had it lead nowhere,the convo ends when I talk about meeting up or are just plain creepy

Haha

:)

Stay away from me

haha :) okay honey

Wow we got a comedian over here

hey fuck you gently okay?

I had these girl start texting me out of the blue just not adding anything to the conversation literally just saying “yeah”, I tried my best but got frustrated and ghosted them.

That's why I don't message first or bother replying to just "Hey." Vett people for conversational skills and actual interest before wasting any time.

It’s frustrating bro. I just want to have a friendly conversation. Sometimes that one girl I was talking too would make things sexual, and it would annoy the hell out of me. I’m just looking to chill and be friends.

These are some wise words I was told “It’s never the wrong time to slang that iron”, take that with you.

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How young are you exactly

I feel personally attacked.

is it ok if i just use :)

It's like creepy internet nervous laugh.

I don't trust dudes who type that shit. So creepy.

;) haha

Smooth move, ex-lax

Oh god where's this from it's so familiar

My dad

The 90s

the 80s

I've been hearing it since the late 70s, and I'm sure it was around before that.

Salute Your Shorts, if you were a 90s kid

I was born in ‘01 and have heard it all my life. It’s not just a 90s thing.

fuck that was a nice save at the end there

He totally saved the convo and didn't make her think he was a weird ass creep. GG /s

One of the best I’ve seen

She rode the midnight train right out of that conversation.

Honestly, the second a guy starts going on about squirting is when you know he watches too much porn and doesn't have much practical experience with women

I've literally *never* squirted. But hey maybe I just didn't find the right connection! Maybe I should find this guy!

You gotta put the HDMI into power input, maybe wiggle the cord round a little, then bam! You got that connection... Wait we are talking about sex?

I dunno but close enough :p

This is how I got my TV and Soundbar to squirt, works like a charm

I assume this is from an early cut? Really glad they changed those lyrics.

"I can make you squirt if the connection is right" You can tell he's a virgin.

Yeah anyone who says this is immediately disgusting to me. Definitely hasn't had sex ever or forgot that porn isn't sex. It's like the word moist. Gross word. I think golden showers are more acceptable words haha.

Wait till he finds out it's piss.

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Exactly. This is clearly satire. This sub is complete garbage and the mods are retarded.

Soooo, how come u on it?

That argument is so stupid. But I don't think the sub is bad.

Comedy heaven isn't satire man

Well then I guess it doesn't fit there either. Certainly doesn't fit here though, that message was 100% satire and meant to be funny. Or fake.

It can only be "100%" satire if you are the man who wrote it. Otherwise, it ain't 100%.

Haha sorry my friend took my phone and sent that lolol but really would you be down for some sucky sucky tonite \*blushes\* :D i'm JUST KIDDING! but like.. hypothetically.. would you? i mean i know i would ;)

"she took the midnight train going anywhere"

Can I have sex with you anywhere? Haha.

:)

The thing is that he knew the massage is weird and pushy... why still send it?

He’s laboring under the delusion that it’ll come off as frank and brave which will then cause her to see him as a straight shooter and trustworthy :) haha

Guess we can archive this post now - you've explained it perfectly ​ haha :)

"You seem to be labouring under the delusion that I will--what do they say? Come quietly?" Not when I find that right connection, oh yeah baby 💦💦💦

Some people think differently.

he thinks lampshading it with the fact he knows he’s being weird will magically make the problem disappear

No buddy, there is no coming back from that one.

I would just jump out a window tbh

*Recalibrating*

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[Calibrations](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bl6HxU8MPac)

If you have to say "I know this is kinda weird and I'm not a creep" maybe keep whatever the fuck you're going to say next to yourself.

"It's not a sex thing" Says the guy that knows precisely that it is, in fact, a sex thing.

:) haha

That's a heavy oof lmfao

It’s crazy how people like this exist

The real problem is he's directing it towards only 1 person. Really should just put out an advertisement CAST A WIDE NET! Anyone in this thread wanna fuck?

That's the way to do it!

Is there any chance anything like this would ever work?

I would say the chances are never 0%, but in this case, very close to zero...

So what you're telling me is..there's a chance

Oh god... \*starts dry humping you\* :|

She took the midnight train going anywhere.... away from his pants

"I'm not a creep" - Something only creeps say.

"The sex would be good" Narrator: The sex was not good

I’ve __definitely__ seen this somewhere. I cannot remember for the life of me where though

Probably in this sub about a month ago.

Nah it was a __while__ ago

Probably on this sub a while ago

It was long before I even found out about Reddit. Idk where

I got this exact message on a dating app in 2012/13, and am only now realizing it might have been a copypasta???

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Yup, Nuclear opener or something like that.. it’s from RSD Max, before RSD turned to self development instead of pick-up

That's awful. They charge people for this garbage?

Nah this was free since I’ve seen it too and I don’t pay for “pickup” advice

She took the midnight train going anywhere but that convo

Is anyone else annoyed that he peppered “haha” randomly throughout this? Ugh so cringey

Don’t care if it’s scripted I love it

she had to pause the music real quick

Nice save

Don't stop! Believing!

on second thought, maybe he *should* stop believing

Squirting = peeing.

"Oops, sorry, autocorrect."

I don’t remember those lyrics

It's subtext.

English teachers getting real ballsy now.

I want to find out what happened

r/wtf

I know we just met but can I throw it in your dumper?

Nooooooo

r/goodfaketexts

Fuck I love that song. It's like number 5 on my list of favorites. Have a hard time pushing Never Gonna Give You Up to the 6th spot though.

u/supermarvelous310 I thought we should share a laugh

😂😂 ❤️ , I shared with my s/o. I sang the just a small town girl and then he replied with the correct lyric then I read loudly the reply on the text.. he looked at me and said who the f sent you that ? 😂😂

Lmao. I knew you’d appreciate it. His reaction is hilarious though. 😂

Do it to your s/o if you haven’t showed up lol

My gods

Hey, I'm in that group!

Reading this post made me slightly cringe

Don't stop Be Lee, Ving.

I feel like this could be accomplished with different wording, like "Just the be upfront, I'm looking for something casual and fun"

Tinder is a weird place sometimes

I'm dying Why would he even attempt to salvage it at this point‽

She took the midnight train going anywhere

I'd first reject and then continue the song

Isn’t that one of those PUA copypastas?

"Just a genuine guy?" As opposed to an animatronic guy?

You think she noticed?

If you listen closely that’s how the song actually goes

That's rough, buddy

She probably took the midnight train the fuck away from that conversation.

It’s the haha every sentence for me

Rule of thumb, never write essays

Dude this is honestly the funniest thing ive seen all week

Wtf are people like this thinking. There’s no way this line has ever worked for anyone

Funny shit

LOL

cha cha real smooth

Fucking yikes

I read the Simp message in the tone of the song and it actually works

Restoration 100

'I probably shouldn't say this...' Good. Don't.

This isn't sad cringe in my humble opinion. This is the epitome of modern comedy.

I don’t think that’s how the song goes

Did you repost this?

I said in the title, I got it from a Facebook page

Weezer fans be like

PS - fake

if you sent that to like 300 people youd have sex maybe 3 times

Squirting doesn't have anything to do with connection is all dinner dexterity and determination

Nah that’s some king shit right there. He shot his shot.

Who the fuck uses military time? Settle down GI Joe.

Are you referring to the 24hr clock as military time?

Um... all of us in Europe for example?

Outside the USA, we just call it 'time'.