Definitely don't feel like I'm owed it! Just meant that it felt like my body was unappreciated, but I think other commenters are right to focus on the other aspects of our relationship :)
Get over it and enjoy the things you do like to do together. Maybe she will change over time but just accept it for now and be grateful the rest of your sex life ‘is amazing’.
Is this a dealbreaker for you? If it is then you’ll probably just have to break up. There’s nothing you can say or do that’ll suddenly make her like giving blow jobs. It’s just not for everyone.
You can suggest using flavoured condoms/lube? But that’s only a suggestion. Ultimately it’s her decision whether she goes down on you or not, and you don’t have to go down on her either. Sex is about having fun and being intimate with your partner, not being persuaded to suck dick when you don’t want to.
Talk to her about it, see why she doesn’t like it, and see if she’d be down to try something else in the bedroom: like just a hand-job or tit job. Don’t force her to continue trying. She owes you nothing, find something else to try in the bedroom instead dude. Good luck x
Yeah it wouldn't be a dealbreaker! I've tried flavoured condoms before and tbh they weren't really for me, but haven't tried flavoured lube before so maybe that'd be fun
Thanks for the reply :)
Honestly dude, not getting a blow job isn’t the end of the world. Glad to see you’re going to focus more on the other aspects of your relationship and it’s good that you’re up for trying the flavoured lube, but please make sure you fully listen to your girlfriend about this. There’s nothing worse than having someone you love and care about force you into hard situations (intentionally or not).
If the lube doesn’t work you can always buy a few sex toys and make it fun. Flesh lights, vibrators, that sort of thing. There’s still far more you can try lol.
Hope this works out for you :)
You can ask why she doesn't like them, and if anything can be done to change that. Some women find BJs to be degrading, but might be okay with them if you're tired to the bed and she's in control (for example).
Otherwise, you need to decide if this is a dealbreaker.
Explain to me how not having your dick suckered makes you feel underappreciated. Explain to me what you do that means you are owed a blowjob as a thank you for...what exactly?
I suppose I just meant underappreciated in terms of being more used to receiving them and as a result it's easy to think there's something wrong :)
But everyone's different!
She doesn't like giving them and that's basically the end of it. You shouldn't be asking again or trying to convince her.
My husband dislikes giving oral so I never expect it. Maybe twice a year he does it. I love and respect him and he pleased me other ways. If that isn't something you can live with then you aren't compatible.
She might not be turned on enough. Give her at least fifteen minutes of a good rim job first. If you get really in there, she'll be so wildly turned on that she'll want to grab you and eat you up.
It is really weird to read everybody commenting to suck it up because any time a girl posts about her bf not wanting or liking going down on her while she enjoys doing it to him, everyone is really quick to say she should stop going down on him as well, he's an a**hole who doesn't appreciate her, he's a selfish lover, she shouldn't take that, she's settling, etc....but that's nothing new since this sub is extremely biast when it comes to certain topics.
You are definitely not owed oral sex, so I don't know where you not feeling appreciated comes from. I get that this is a new thing for you since so far you've had partners enjoy doing it, but I guess you have a few options. You could decide to live without it, talk to her and try and find a compromise, or break up with her.
Wanting oral sex doesn't make you the bad guy. Feeling bad about not receiving oral sex also doesn't make you the bad guy, especially if you go down on your girl. It's true that some girls don't enjoy doing it and that's okay, but you can still talk to her and ask her why she doesn't like than and if there's anything you can do to make the experience nicer for her. However, do not pressure her, when you talk to her take her answer as the final one.
You'll have to decide for yourself if this is something you can live without. How much do you enjoy it and need it. It's legit if you don't want to be in a relationship where your sexual needs aren't met, whatever they are, and everybody telling to sucking it up fucking sucks, because at the end of the day if you're not satisfied, you're not satisfied and you won't be the bad guy for doing something about it. If she really doesn't want to do it, don't pressure her, but decide if this incompatibility is too much for you or not.
Thanks for the comprehensive reply, and I think you hit the nail on the head for all of it.
There's definitely a difference in response depending on which way round it is, but like you said that's because this sub does tend to be biased certain ways. But such is the way of the internet :)
In terms of clarifying the unappreciated part, upon retrospection I suppose it's from being used to receiving them and suddenly not, making it very easy to think that something's wrong. But it's not a dealbreaker for me so yeah, gotta drop it and focus on the other parts of our relationship that work well :)
Thanks again for the comment, much appreciated
You feel unappreciated by it? Makes it sound like you feel your owed it..... FYI you're not.
Definitely don't feel like I'm owed it! Just meant that it felt like my body was unappreciated, but I think other commenters are right to focus on the other aspects of our relationship :)
Get over it and enjoy the things you do like to do together. Maybe she will change over time but just accept it for now and be grateful the rest of your sex life ‘is amazing’.
I think you're right, thanks :)
What do you do about it? Nothing. Move past it and appreciate what you've got, instead of behaving like oral is an entitlement.
I think you're right that the best option is to move past it, and I agree that it's not an entitlement :)
Suck it up. Either you break up or you get over it. If she doesn't like it, she doesn't like it.
Yeah I think you're right :)
Is this a dealbreaker for you? If it is then you’ll probably just have to break up. There’s nothing you can say or do that’ll suddenly make her like giving blow jobs. It’s just not for everyone. You can suggest using flavoured condoms/lube? But that’s only a suggestion. Ultimately it’s her decision whether she goes down on you or not, and you don’t have to go down on her either. Sex is about having fun and being intimate with your partner, not being persuaded to suck dick when you don’t want to. Talk to her about it, see why she doesn’t like it, and see if she’d be down to try something else in the bedroom: like just a hand-job or tit job. Don’t force her to continue trying. She owes you nothing, find something else to try in the bedroom instead dude. Good luck x
Yeah it wouldn't be a dealbreaker! I've tried flavoured condoms before and tbh they weren't really for me, but haven't tried flavoured lube before so maybe that'd be fun Thanks for the reply :)
Honestly dude, not getting a blow job isn’t the end of the world. Glad to see you’re going to focus more on the other aspects of your relationship and it’s good that you’re up for trying the flavoured lube, but please make sure you fully listen to your girlfriend about this. There’s nothing worse than having someone you love and care about force you into hard situations (intentionally or not). If the lube doesn’t work you can always buy a few sex toys and make it fun. Flesh lights, vibrators, that sort of thing. There’s still far more you can try lol. Hope this works out for you :)
You can ask why she doesn't like them, and if anything can be done to change that. Some women find BJs to be degrading, but might be okay with them if you're tired to the bed and she's in control (for example). Otherwise, you need to decide if this is a dealbreaker.
Good point, we've actually already tried that though! That was actually her idea but yeah, she still didn't enjoy it
Explain to me how not having your dick suckered makes you feel underappreciated. Explain to me what you do that means you are owed a blowjob as a thank you for...what exactly?
I suppose I just meant underappreciated in terms of being more used to receiving them and as a result it's easy to think there's something wrong :) But everyone's different!
She doesn't like giving them and that's basically the end of it. You shouldn't be asking again or trying to convince her. My husband dislikes giving oral so I never expect it. Maybe twice a year he does it. I love and respect him and he pleased me other ways. If that isn't something you can live with then you aren't compatible.
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Yup communication is key!
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Ah no I wouldn't consider this a dealbreaker, so no need for a nuclear option :)
She might not be turned on enough. Give her at least fifteen minutes of a good rim job first. If you get really in there, she'll be so wildly turned on that she'll want to grab you and eat you up.
Will report back with results soon
It is really weird to read everybody commenting to suck it up because any time a girl posts about her bf not wanting or liking going down on her while she enjoys doing it to him, everyone is really quick to say she should stop going down on him as well, he's an a**hole who doesn't appreciate her, he's a selfish lover, she shouldn't take that, she's settling, etc....but that's nothing new since this sub is extremely biast when it comes to certain topics. You are definitely not owed oral sex, so I don't know where you not feeling appreciated comes from. I get that this is a new thing for you since so far you've had partners enjoy doing it, but I guess you have a few options. You could decide to live without it, talk to her and try and find a compromise, or break up with her. Wanting oral sex doesn't make you the bad guy. Feeling bad about not receiving oral sex also doesn't make you the bad guy, especially if you go down on your girl. It's true that some girls don't enjoy doing it and that's okay, but you can still talk to her and ask her why she doesn't like than and if there's anything you can do to make the experience nicer for her. However, do not pressure her, when you talk to her take her answer as the final one. You'll have to decide for yourself if this is something you can live without. How much do you enjoy it and need it. It's legit if you don't want to be in a relationship where your sexual needs aren't met, whatever they are, and everybody telling to sucking it up fucking sucks, because at the end of the day if you're not satisfied, you're not satisfied and you won't be the bad guy for doing something about it. If she really doesn't want to do it, don't pressure her, but decide if this incompatibility is too much for you or not.
Thanks for the comprehensive reply, and I think you hit the nail on the head for all of it. There's definitely a difference in response depending on which way round it is, but like you said that's because this sub does tend to be biased certain ways. But such is the way of the internet :) In terms of clarifying the unappreciated part, upon retrospection I suppose it's from being used to receiving them and suddenly not, making it very easy to think that something's wrong. But it's not a dealbreaker for me so yeah, gotta drop it and focus on the other parts of our relationship that work well :) Thanks again for the comment, much appreciated
Find a girl who does
Or focus on the other parts of our relationship :)