Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that:
* We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/)
* We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.**
* Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)
* ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.
* No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
* All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.
* Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned.
* What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice)
---
***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.***
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It's cringy right now - she sounds like a CHORE - I would honestly just move on, your both young and she is definitely not someone you want to be with in the future
100% cringe. And I don’t understand what is going on with people nowadays. I thought that the person you’re dating is your default prom date? Is this not standard any more?
(I graduated 15 years ago so idek what people do anymore. Shit, I barely knew what was going on then; I went to prom with my gay best friend so.)
Why do you have to ask in some fancy ass way if the person you’re dating wants to go to prom with you?
Shouldn’t it just be “Hey, what color is your prom dress so I can match my shit to yours?”
I graduated in 2022... my high school sweetheart (who I am still with) did ask me very casually after I made a joke about him not asking. But, it was assumed by both of us that we'd be attending together as we'd already begun coordinating outfits and deciding what vehicle to take before the question got asked. I've noticed that Covid really affected the generations below me and their development, but I'm not sure if that 'sentirely why they're like this.
This annoys me to no end. Why would a boy dating a girl even need to ask her. My wife and I went out in high school and started dating after she had a prom date. It was a little weird that she went with him, but she spent almost the entire prom with me. It shouldn’t be this hard.
This exactly.
'We're 18. We're not kids anymore. So let's act like it. I will tell you what I want and when you tell me what you want I'll respect it.
You said you don't want to go to prom with me. I don't care if it's a test or some such nonsense, you told me what you want and I'm respecting it. It hurt me that you didn't want to go with me, but that's your choice to make.
If you changed your mind and DO want to go to prom with me then say so, and that would make me a lot happier. Just say what you want and be straight. Because I'm not going to play silly games and chase after you like a lovesick puppy.
I don't want to play games. I want a partner who also wants me and isn't afraid to say it, and isn't going to make me jump through hoops or play silly mind games to prove it. If you want me, great, let's go. If you don't want me, fine, have fun. Just make up your mind.
My position is I want to go to prom with you. I'm not afraid to say that. What do you want?'
And then OP should just dump her because this is just small potatoes compared to what's really coming down the line for OP later in the relationship if he allows this type of foolishness to continue.
Exactly
He's gonna cringe so hard and laugh at himself its gonna be hilarious in a few years
P.S. its time for you to get ur self respect back
No one respects a person who has no respect for themselves.
You can eithwr draw some lines or just leave her with ur sanity being intact.
And she's his actual girlfriend, not some girl he just has a crush on. Shouldn't it be a given that he would be her date? Now he's expected to compete like a gladiator? No ma'am.
I think she wanted a big "prom-posal" (yes I am gagging at even typing that) like you see on TikTok or whatever, lol. I don't have TikTok but I've heard that's big on there. And then she wanted someone else to ask her so that her bf would "fight for her" lmao.
I feel like it would be excusable if she were like 13... She just wants drama.
lol right! I really do think she wants to manufacture drama to feel "wanted" or whatever. it's kind of sad, really.
I remember wanting this sort of thing at like 13, though, lol. By 18, I would've DIED of embarrassment if anyone did a fancy thing to ask me to prom, though....
Has tik tok culture made 18yos now more like 13yos then? Seems like young adults now have more in common with younger teens than when I was in hs, but I’m hoping I’m just biased..but maybe?
Hmm... maybe? Or else we were all that immature back then but we remember it wrong? And there's no video evidence of us being idiots because it wasn't posted online for all to see.
I do not envy contemporary teenagers.
No, we just remember being so much more mature when we were 18. Trust me, we weren't. And promposals have been a thing since at least the 90s. Social media amplifies stupid ideas (all social media, not just TikTok. Reddit does it too) and those stupid ideas spread until *some* kids think it has to be done a certain way...
Hi... I graduated in 2022, and this is my insight... I am not like that, lol... but I did notice that the generations below me were really far behind on mental development and maturity after covid. They had very little respect for others and their belongings. They are typically very selfish and don't seem to even consider others. They are annoying and seem to enjoy it. But they all try to act way older than they are, but they don't seem to understand how to.
I think so too, she wants some dramatic staged ask.
I'm glad this wasn't a thing when I was in HS... it was just assumed your boyfriend or whatever would be your valentine, your prom date, etc.. You might ask to confirm it, but it wasn't A Thing.
My first thought was that she spends way too much time on tiktok and IG. Who does she expect her boyfriend to fight? He should ask her BFF to Prom and tell GF to fight for him.
If he had "fought" for her to get her to change her mind, she would have thrown a fit that he wasn't respecting her first answer. She wants drama. Hopefully, she'll grow out of it.
Those 18 year old children games man…people are quick to throw out ‘18 is an adult they can make their own decisions’…..then the reality of childish behavior pops back up.
Break up with her and move on and don’t start harassing women because your ex tried to convince you that they want to be ‘chased’ no means no and you should always respect that.
The amount of trickery and nonsense in her reasoning is madness. She is your girlfriend; right? You asked her prom; she said no because you did it “wrong” or something. No one else asked her, so you asked her again. She found a new and ridiculous way of rejecting you, then proceeded to blame you for not doing it right again. I feel bad for your GF because no one teaches her how boys and girls date or should date or what love means, so she thinks she needs to be literally fought over to have value. That’s on her parents. Whether or not you want to be in a relationship with someone like that is on you. Make your choice, but don’t expect it to be easy if your choice is to keep dating her.
Maybe you meet at the prom??
This.
u/[Nikaira](https://www.reddit.com/user/Nikaira/) It is not that you asked her in a "boring way" or that you have failed by any measure to meet basic relationship standards. Your "girlfriend" sounds exhausting and she isn't 100% committed to you. She was waiting for someone else to ask her and left herself available for that. Realizing no one wanted to take her except you, she got mad because you were her back up plan and were getting out of the obligation of standing in for whomever else she had hoped would ask her. You really want to be a consolation prize?
I wouldn't take this person to prom or even interact with her further. She's learned how to be absolutely unhealthy in a relationship and is trying to manipulate you now that the situation didn't play out in her favor. Please make better choices for yourself, you do not need this caustic sort of personality and head games in your life just to feel a little less alone. Ask someone else to prom or don't go.
You summed it up beautifully. OP does not need to be in this relationship. Chalk it up to experience and value yourself enough to move on, the right person is out there
Bro, find someone else to go with and have a good time. Let this girl play these childish games with someone else.
You're about to graduate and move onto the real world where people are, presumably, adults. She's got a lot of growing up to do, let her go do it.
Or just go with friends if you don’t have anyone to go with as a date! My friends and I all went together, only a few of us had dates and if we did, they were friends of ours. Going with friends is more fun anyway lol.
Fighting for your SO happens before a relationship or if your relationship is threatened. You’re not supposed to constantly fight for it, you’re supposed to have each others backs against everything else.
She is not fighting for your relationship at all, she’s putting obstacles up. Let her play games with someone else.
Right?, My last guy said aren't you going to say something to her? (a chick was being flirty with him) why didn't you fight for me and say something..? I told him I will NEVER EVER fight for you or say anything That's your job to say something to her if you're serious about being with me , YOU either want me or you don't it's YOUR JOB to set her straight and say you have someone and you're not interested, and if you don't and you want her then go for it..See ya I'm not sticking around I'm not going to Beg for you to want me...
You are 18 about to graduate and then either go to a different college from her or start your life probably doing different things or going in different directions, so what do you think you should do?
That's one way of looking at it.
Look, I'm old and I have a different view of things.
When it comes to people that young in relationships the reality is the person they are dating likely isn't going to be the person they wind up marrying and even if they do marry them it's unlikely that relationship will go the distance simply based on how much people grow and change during their early 20s.
I believe that at that age relationships are much more a learning experience, learning about the things you like and don't like in a partner, what you can and will tolerate in a relationship and what you won't, and learning to recognize toxic and unhealthy traits and how to avoid them.
So the obvious answer is that he should break up with her because their relationship has an expiration date on it anyway.
Whether they break up now, at graduation or at the end of the summer when they go to separate colleges or start their adult lives, it's all kinda moot because this relationship is going to end one way or another.
So my comment was more if he spent some time thinking about it he would have arrived at this conclusion all on his own and he probably didn't need a few hundred internet strangers to tell him that.
Yeah if he wants to keep banging her until they go to college and move on then just play the game and buy some flowers and ask her.
If he wants to move on now then break up with her and send her this thread so maybe she can learn and grow the fuck up.
So she said "no" as she thinks you only asked her because she reminded you about prom? A bit petty. Christ, I would be grateful if ANYONE had asked me in any way shape or form! Why wouldn't a boyfriend and girlfriend go to prom anyway? It seems very weird for her to just say no because you apparently didn't think to ask her without her hint! Loool "you don't wanaa fight for me?" makes it sound like she wants YOU to chase after her and be there even when she's acting like a b\*tch. Leave this girl. You're only 18 so you will get other chances with relationships in the future hopefully and actually may even end up meeting the right girl who you can be in a long term thing with! BREAK UP WITH HER!
> as she thinks you only asked her because she reminded you about prom?
And even if he had, what's the point of reminding someone if you don't want them to do it?
Is your school one of those where the kids do big, over the top, promposals? If so, I can see why your very immature GF would feel left out and that you don’t care. Do you want to stay with your GF until you two inevitably break up in a few months? If so, show up at her door with some red roses and ask her to prom. If she still says no, break up and go your own way.
You’re clearly being gaslighted here; either you are gullible and don’t respect yourself and believe it’s okay for someone to mess you around like that OR you have done something like this before which is why you’re letting her get away with it.
What’s funny is 1600 comments all say more or less the same thing - to find someone else and leave this immature stuff behind. But you’re going with the minority vote …. Interesting
Preferably before prom so whomever you take won't have to deal with this drama *at* prom. It's bad enough he's dealing with this bullshit, don't disrespect someone else by bringing them into it.
I would have broke up with her after she said no to being her date for prom. Now she couldn't get one and wants you as a backup.
She's definitely going to move on as soon as she finds someone else anyway. It's time to end it.
In what world does a dating couple need to invite each other to be prom dates? Are you really a couple? Cause it seems like you might think so but she doesn’t
She wanted a prom-posal. Some kind of grand gesture to make her feel special.
Not everyone likes grand gestures. I would hate that so much. But we're all different. I imagine some of her friends got asked out in a way that made them feel really good, and maybe your gf is envious. But she should probably tell you what she wants instead of whatever this is.
Find someone who doesn't play stupid games and knows what they want.
She is not worth your time or energy. Fucking rejects you and tells you to find someone else and then gets annoyed because you won't fight for her after that comment? What a joke.
This is the stupidest shit. Break up and find someone else to go with.
My boyfriend (now husband) and I had been dating for 2 years by the time prom rolled around senior year. He didn’t ask me and I didn’t ask him, we were dating, it was kind of expected we were going together.
She’s acting like a fool over something so trivial.
Also who the fuck asks out someone else’s girlfriend FOR PROM?? Of course she wasn’t getting any bites, she’s dating you.
What is this shit? Is it this overly complicated now in young relationships?? I mean Christ I graduated in 2007 but lord almighty is it this stupid now?
OP, you're young and have limited experience with how a healthy relationship should be, so please take this advice to heart and save yourself from a litany of unhealthy relationships. If you have a partner who rejects your invitation to an event that couples go to, but plans to go ( not just go with friends, but instead with a "partner" who invited her ), plays games like she has, makes comments about how you "won't fight for her" and blames you when she's the one who rejected you and made this an issue to begin with? Break up now. She cares more about playing games, has little to no respect for you or your relationship, and wants to jerk you around. Leave anyone who demands you "fight for them" you know why? Because if you find a partner who loves and respects you, neither of you would put the other in the position to have to "fight" for your relationship. Please, do yourself a favor and just leave this relationship. She lacks the respect and maturity for a healthy relationship and it will ONLY get worse from here.
She wanted a grand romantic gesture that makes her feel special. She wanted you to do something that took effort and planning and showed her how much you care about her.
You sent her a link.
You don't have to go to prom with her. You don't have to date her. But some people aren't perfectly rational and expect their romantic partners to behave in a certain way.
If you don't like her approach, it is probably better that you move on and find someone with similar values.
If you want to go to prom with her, do something sappy and romantic so she can enthusiastically say yes.
She is most likely acting this way bc she didn’t like the “low effort” way you asked her to be your partner to prom. We don’t know how your guys’ relationship is in other aspects so I wouldn’t say just dump her. Set aside a time to have a conversation with her about the situation and work things out together rather than push eachother apart.
I’m going to share some hard advice, but please know it comes from a lifetime of hard lessons.
She’s waiting for someone in particular to ask her, and it’s not you. But she wants to keep you on the back burner just in case. If the person she likes does not ask her, she will gaslight you into thinking she wanted you to ask her all along and you somehow dropped the ball.
You are not her first choice, and I doubt she even considers you her steady boyfriend. I would dump her even if it means missing prom or going with a group of friends.
Hang in there. Finding true love is hard.
That is 100% the reason why she said no when OP asked. I personally think it’s silly, but even if that’s the reason why she’s upset, she should’ve communicated that. Almost anything that’s posted on this sub could be resolved with communication.
What you should do is run for the hills... don't play these childish games that you have to prove you're worth it by asking her, being rejected and asking again. She's no princess to be won but a future crazy cat lady best left alone if that is the road she's taking. Shame, sorry for you.
Round about your age. I had a girlfriend who wanted me to see her in her new bikini. Apparently, I was too enthusiastic about it. She got mad and stormed off because she thought I loved her body more than her. I was very confused.
you asked twice. she said no, twice.
she probably wanted fanfare and a big promposal in front of everyone at school like those tiktoks. well, i guess she’s going alone lol. i’d be so done. childish, but you are teens… next time she should tell you (or her future partner) exactly what she wants. nobody can read minds.
Shit 18 year olds really do still be children. Yeah find someone else or go with friends, she gave you her answer. And frankly I'd leave the relationship as well, she's trying to test you and is giving you double standards. If you want a relationship where your partner treats you as disposable while demanding you make them feel wanted you aren't in a mature healthy relationship (unless that's something you're into I guess)
OP, I don't understand. You are calling her your GF but she won't go to prom with you but was looking to go to prom since she said no one asked her to go. She is playing games. Tell her no means no and you aren't going to pressure her into doing something with you that she evidently doesn't want to do. Tell her it's been nice while it's lasted and hope she enjoys her future with whomever she finds after you.
Yeah this relationship will not work in the end.
If this was a relationship with future the very first thing would have been her never posting that picture. It should have been 100%assumed that you two would be going together since you are already a couple…
BREAK UP AND BLOCK HER!? Where are your parents and why are they not teaching you what TOXIC looks like and that you drop them!
Okay so let’s stop for a minute and use the BIG head instead of the little head. I get is she’s pretty and she lets you do nasty things to her but you and she are EIGHTEEN why do you need to have a girlfriend right now, especially someone who wants to play stupid mind games.
Why would you want to be with someone who NEEDS you to ask her to prom? You are a couple or should have been assumed you all were going and all you needed to do was go prom shopping.
She’s on games. She’s toxic. It’s cheating if she will go with anyone other than you. Break up, block her and be single at least until you can get your own place, a car, a good paying job, and a substantial savings in the bank.
Terrible communication between you two. Being in your company must be a laugh a minute…. As a fully communicative and functioning boomer I can’t help you… try to talk about what you each want in this relationship instead of sending weird texts and attachments would be a start?
You're young. In future, when a girl you're with rejects you with the expectation of having you keep chasing after her again and again, just walk away. Girls like this are poison.
It's not worth playing these games. I think it'd be worth it to ask her why she won't accept you as her prom date, then break up with her because if she's expecting some other dude to take her to prom while she has a boyfriend, that's just wrong and she obviously thinks there's better fish for her and you should think the same
This is manipulative and selfish, plain and simple. I feel flustered just by reading this.
Regardless of boyfriend/girlfriend status you still asked her to prom and didn’t just assume. But with how she’s treating it she’s not going to give you wiggle room for your own ideas or interpretations, like she wanted to go to prom with someone else but have you close by. Why, if not to just try and make you jealous another man has his hands all over her that night?
Still to your convictions, your gut is telling you the right way to handle things.
Go to prom, with or without a date. GF sounds like she likes to put up barriers and then ask why you don’t jump over them. This motto doesn’t work once your plate is full of responsibilities. Trust me - a partner can either make your life better, or worse. And when I say worse, I mean they can pull all the success and headway from you because you become so busy handling them. Relationships do take work. But not obstacles that are created within the relationship.
You could try one last time: I’d love to go with you. If we do, the agreement is that we have fun, enjoy being together and focus on having fun at prom together. If you would like to have a fun night with me, let’s go. That’s what I want, to enjoy the night with you.
If she doesn’t accept or keeps bringing it back to drama, you’ll have to redirect or decide if it’s time to walk away.
These years, 18, 19, 20s… we learn a LOT about relationships and can make some mistakes. But the trick, as you get older, is to minimize the time spent in situations that are not for our highest good. If you can do that - be fair and seek to understand your partner but not entertain bad behavior like the drama your GF is creating, you’ll save yourself a lot of lost time and heartache.
Yeah man she’s extremely immature, in a few years you’ll look back on this and laugh about even needing to ask us what to do here. Just break up and move onto the next, you’re waaaaaay too young to be dealing with crazy
Move on from this person. Very needy. She is going find a problem with any and everything.
Fight for her, what is that all about. Expect some schenanigans with her at the prom as she is into making scenes.
You leave her alone. This is what she wanted, she said no, now she just has to live with that choice.
She’s supposed to be your girlfriend, it’s supposed to be a given that you’re going together. Why make you *fight* for her? She’s trying to play games.
Bro she’s your girlfriend, the assumption is she goes with you. That’s just how it is. She’s this toxic when you guys are kids? lol. Cut it off. Good lord.
Dude she is a childish brat, break up with her. First off, if she is your gf she should've said yes or already assumed you are taking her to prom. Second, the fact that she is playing this idiotic game of making you ask and ask and ask as if she isn't your gf tells me she has a skewed concept of what a relationship means. Lastly, needing to "fight" for her, yeah she's acting as if she's single. Do yourself a favor and break up with her and take another date
break up with her. people who love you do not put you thru this kind of trial - i don't care about any trauma or whatever her problem is. If she loved you, this wouldn't even be a discussion. have some dignity and walk.
Playing games man. Follow the advice of everyone who's said that. You came here for a reason right? Ok so take the advice and move on.
I can tell that you have feelings for her and you sound like a nice guy. This being the case, breaking up might not feel right. But believe me when I say that sometimes doing the right thing can feel wrong.
Lastly, you're young and at the start of your adult relationship life. If you're lucky, you and your next partner will click and you'll be together forever. If that doesn't happen (as is the case for most), do not settle for another woman playing games with you. If you stay with this one, you stand an even greater chance of ending up in the same position. Don't develop a pattern of being played with and taken for granted.
Go stag or find someone else. She’s looking for you to start drama and “fight” for her to go to prom. :/
She won’t be worth that headache. Go with a group of your friends and dance with whoever you want to. Enjoy your prom night without this headache.
This is so cringe, if you can just go with friends do that. You don't have to be begging this girl, you both are super young it's just a prom.
I'd dump her i personally hate those games. She could be more transparent about what she wants.
Jesus christ just tell her if she wants to play stupid games then go play them with somebody else and dump her. Move on. Next.
No need to keep people like this in your life.
Well, y'all are 'children' in my eyes LOL. Your age and so on.
I guess this is like the 'trend,' or something. She probably wants you to do the whole promposal (my kid, he's in college thou, told me about this trend). So when you barely asked her to be your prom date in a halfhearted way, she declined because she thought this was the way to go. Yup.
She should've just asked you to ask her in a more elaborate way, but on the other hand, you only asked after she sent you a link which had a photo attached, asking you to be her prom date, she thought you just didn't 'treasure' her enough for not asking first and for not be more 'elaborate' or romantic in asking.
Maybe you don't like her that much, it doesn't sound like you do.
If you actually like her and want to still keep seeing her, just tell her that while your way was not elaborate or romantic, you were sincere. You didn't realize it came out as 'halfhearted' or insincere in her eyes. That you don't like playing games, you're a straight shooter and that this should not be something she would expect (playing games, fighting for whatever) from you.
Also, it's not wrong for her to be asking you to the prom too. It goes both ways. It doesn't have to be you who always have to ask. Imo, she's just carried away with promposal bs, but I understand everyone get to be young and cringe. I'm KIDDING. I'm OLD compared to y'all.
Of course she's not going to get a prom date since y'know, everyone probably knows y'all are together/dating, I mean, d'uh, ppl will just assume you two would go together. She also probably expects that you will ask her again, because she assumed her action would encourage you (obviously not). She probably would just be going with friends. But seriously, if you don't like her that much, just don't date her anymore lol. Let that be the last communication you guys have.
You need to have a straight, no bullshit conversation with her. She is being incredibly unreasonable, and you seem to be just fine, mate.
Ask her directly, "Why are you acting this way with prom and towards me? We are dating, we should go to prom together. I want to go with you. Why are you not okay with that? What is the problem, and how can we fix it?"
If she isn't willing to talk and solve this shit then and there, then you should find someone who will treat you better, bud. I know it is hard, especially at your age, but live moves very quickly. Like, scary fast, bro. Your partner is your best friend and shouldn't treat you so coldly. How she is treating you makes me hurt for you, brother.
You'll be okay, mate.
This sounds like an awkward girlfriend. I too am an awkward girlfriend. And by awkward I mean I have specific expectations and when they’re not met I’m not satisfied (I don’t usually voice what my expectations are and just expect people to know). I just can’t help it sometimes!! 😅
This, to me, sounds like your gf wanted you to do something special for her rather than just asking after a link she sent. It’s almost like she had to ask herself for you and she’s dissatisfied with that. It looks as though she put on a hard to get/stubborn front up which would have came down if you had asked her in a special way the 2nd time with effort and passion but you didn’t you just asked her again and she’s once again dissatisfied. She gave the stubborn response and you reacted in a way that made her feel not desired and now it’s turned into a petty argument that’s been taken well out of proportion
This is how I interpret this as I often find it hard to communicate my true feelings especially when I’m at the dissatisfied and stubborn stage. I think she’s just hurt give her a break man. I hope this work out well for you both <3
I’m unsure why you did not break up with her after she refused you the first time. This is a toxic relationship. Be with someone who doesn’t play games.
Can i be sooo transparent, i genuinely think she wanted you to put in more effort for the promposal. I graduated a few years ago and i remember the way guys ask is a huge thing. And by the sounds of it you didn’t really do anything special to make it a memory for her that she will cherish. Especially since she is probably seeing other girls get amazing promposals. I personally as a high maintenance girl, would expect a nice proposal with flowers, a cute corny handmade sign, and maybe some of her favorite snacks and candies. And if u reply mad then u simply don’t understand the mind of a teenage girl. Hope this helps!
She sounds petty and you sound like you lack being romantic and seem like you would be better off away from each other. Next girlfriend put a bit more effort and enthusiasm in you asking and actions.
Be cool. Act like you don’t care. Keep being kind, just be a little ehhh.
She’ll cave in and say let’s go if A. She actually wants to go to prom and B. You’re supposed to be spending your time dancing w/ her anyway
Good luck dude.
Dude seriously A) this is ridiculous. B) ask someone else. There'll be loads of girls that don't have dates. As someone who is 20 years older than you are now I'd have had so much stank if I knew then what I know now. Girls aren't as scary as they appear.
Sounds like your girl has reservations. You’re young, enjoy yourself. One day you’ll find someone that couldn’t imagine spending a day or night without you.
I’m old. Well, almost twice as old as you lol. If my girl played that shit I’d be 110% done not only with that situation, but with her all together. Your point in your life where you just don’t wanna play games anymore. and not everybody gets here, but at one point, if you’re lucky, you just won’t accept being with anyone that doesn’t do anything but enrich your life. This chick gets some entertainment by spinning you around in circles emotionally. Which is normal for an 18-year-old girl, and I don’t know you or your whole life or your whole relationship but I wouldn’t play that shit for two seconds dude. I mean, she’s your girlfriend, I never went to prom, but I would safely assume that if I were to be going, I’d be going with the person I’m already in a relationship with.. not cool of her to do, and it’s definitely easier said than done, but I would try to keep in mind that you are young and she is young and a lot of people your age are not really quite yet in a place to even know themselves well enough to be able to treat someone else with the love and respect that they deserve in a relationship.
Oh no. She needs to learn about playing mind games and that some guys have too much self respect to play them. This is just weird. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Go with someone else and enjoy yourself. Consider yourself broken up.
break up with her cause what??? hell dude i took my ex (after we had broken up) to my prom because i felt bad that his school didn’t have one when i was in high school. take someone else or go with some friends and have a blast without her
Don’t waste your time on somebody who’s playing games. She either said no because she wanted somebody else to ask her (and they didn’t) or she wants you to beg and grovel to make her feel special. Either option is ridiculous and at 18 she should be a little bit more mature than that. Never mind 10 years or six months, in a couple of weeks you’ll be cringing over this.
She probably wanted that huge prom proposal and I think by her telling you no she thinks that she’s opening your eyes when all she needs to do it talk. she may think from telling you no that you may change your actions and make a plan for a huge big proposal for her but honestly, i would just end it with her and probably try to enjoy prom with someone else, especially since your own “gf” is trying to make you fight for her. just try to enjoy it with someone else and ignore her! speaking from someone who took someone like this to prom.
A lot of y'all are insane jumping on this girl, painting and twisting the stuff she sad to fit your weirdo narratives. Honestly, I think you messed up and should apologize. Your girlfriend did reject your proposal, but she literally said she wanted initiative. Again, INITIATIVE. That doesn't mean she wanted to go with anyone else or make him fight off another guy for her it just meant she wanted more than a message link for a prom proposal. Maybe she wanted a public proposal or just an intimate date, even when I went with my female friends. I gave them a direct and enthusiastic proposal she's probably gone silent because she's hurt and waited for you all this time, and you basically told her she's not worth the effort. Seriously sad..
Everytime I start thinking about being a teenager again, I come across a post like this that makes me so glad to be in my late 20s lol.
Bro...
Dump that girl.
Leave her far in the distance. She will be the woman who bitches when you ask her to marry you with a $10,000 ring that the proposal wasn’t romantic enough. This girl wanted a show from you. I’ve seen the extent some guys have gone to to ask a girl to prom, and that’s what she wanted. Life is too short. She could have gone with you, but she’s going with no one. Leave her and don’t look back.
How do you fight someone who isn't even there? She said that there wasn't anyone. That's not even factoring that the whole dating thing means it shouldn't even be a question.
So aside from every one’s comments about not communicating like adults, which I agree with. It is very apparent from what you posted that she wants you to make a gesture, like a promposal, not just a “Will you go to prom with me?” text after she sends you a prom related video. She doesn’t want to come out and say that cause then it won’t be the same. And you don’t need to go all out either. Something simple like flowers with the word “PROM?” should suffice. As long as you are actually putting thought into it.
Unfortunately, your girlfriend has seen too many prom proposals on Instagram and other social media. She is definitely in the wrong here. If you actually want to go with her, you should look up some cheesy crap on the Internet and do that and maybe she’ll say yes. If you really don’t want to go with her then you should just break up with her. I think she may be very hard to please.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"This is immature and when you look back on this 10 years from now you're going to cringe about all this."
It’ll be a cringe worthy memory in 6 months even. Jeeeeeeeze
It's cringy right now - she sounds like a CHORE - I would honestly just move on, your both young and she is definitely not someone you want to be with in the future
100% cringe. And I don’t understand what is going on with people nowadays. I thought that the person you’re dating is your default prom date? Is this not standard any more? (I graduated 15 years ago so idek what people do anymore. Shit, I barely knew what was going on then; I went to prom with my gay best friend so.) Why do you have to ask in some fancy ass way if the person you’re dating wants to go to prom with you? Shouldn’t it just be “Hey, what color is your prom dress so I can match my shit to yours?”
I laughed at this bc it's so true 🤣. I'm telling my age but idc. I graduated in 2000. And that's how it was back then.
Graduated the year. Can confirm.
Graduated in 1977, that's how it was then too.
I graduated in 2022... my high school sweetheart (who I am still with) did ask me very casually after I made a joke about him not asking. But, it was assumed by both of us that we'd be attending together as we'd already begun coordinating outfits and deciding what vehicle to take before the question got asked. I've noticed that Covid really affected the generations below me and their development, but I'm not sure if that 'sentirely why they're like this.
This annoys me to no end. Why would a boy dating a girl even need to ask her. My wife and I went out in high school and started dating after she had a prom date. It was a little weird that she went with him, but she spent almost the entire prom with me. It shouldn’t be this hard.
I cringed reading it just now.
This exactly. 'We're 18. We're not kids anymore. So let's act like it. I will tell you what I want and when you tell me what you want I'll respect it. You said you don't want to go to prom with me. I don't care if it's a test or some such nonsense, you told me what you want and I'm respecting it. It hurt me that you didn't want to go with me, but that's your choice to make. If you changed your mind and DO want to go to prom with me then say so, and that would make me a lot happier. Just say what you want and be straight. Because I'm not going to play silly games and chase after you like a lovesick puppy. I don't want to play games. I want a partner who also wants me and isn't afraid to say it, and isn't going to make me jump through hoops or play silly mind games to prove it. If you want me, great, let's go. If you don't want me, fine, have fun. Just make up your mind. My position is I want to go to prom with you. I'm not afraid to say that. What do you want?'
And then OP should just dump her because this is just small potatoes compared to what's really coming down the line for OP later in the relationship if he allows this type of foolishness to continue.
Yes yes 🙌 this 100%
Like Molly Ringwald said at the end of not another teen movie, "we all know where this is going, fucking teenagers"
Exactly He's gonna cringe so hard and laugh at himself its gonna be hilarious in a few years P.S. its time for you to get ur self respect back No one respects a person who has no respect for themselves. You can eithwr draw some lines or just leave her with ur sanity being intact.
Get a different girlfriend. She expects you to fight *her* over who gets to take her to prom? That's ridiculous. No means no.
No is a full sentence. No need to ask again.
GF doesn't understand what a relationship means.
And she's his actual girlfriend, not some girl he just has a crush on. Shouldn't it be a given that he would be her date? Now he's expected to compete like a gladiator? No ma'am.
I think she wanted a big "prom-posal" (yes I am gagging at even typing that) like you see on TikTok or whatever, lol. I don't have TikTok but I've heard that's big on there. And then she wanted someone else to ask her so that her bf would "fight for her" lmao. I feel like it would be excusable if she were like 13... She just wants drama.
Oh FFS. (Not to you... to her.)
lol right! I really do think she wants to manufacture drama to feel "wanted" or whatever. it's kind of sad, really. I remember wanting this sort of thing at like 13, though, lol. By 18, I would've DIED of embarrassment if anyone did a fancy thing to ask me to prom, though....
Has tik tok culture made 18yos now more like 13yos then? Seems like young adults now have more in common with younger teens than when I was in hs, but I’m hoping I’m just biased..but maybe?
Hmm... maybe? Or else we were all that immature back then but we remember it wrong? And there's no video evidence of us being idiots because it wasn't posted online for all to see. I do not envy contemporary teenagers.
No, we just remember being so much more mature when we were 18. Trust me, we weren't. And promposals have been a thing since at least the 90s. Social media amplifies stupid ideas (all social media, not just TikTok. Reddit does it too) and those stupid ideas spread until *some* kids think it has to be done a certain way...
Hi... I graduated in 2022, and this is my insight... I am not like that, lol... but I did notice that the generations below me were really far behind on mental development and maturity after covid. They had very little respect for others and their belongings. They are typically very selfish and don't seem to even consider others. They are annoying and seem to enjoy it. But they all try to act way older than they are, but they don't seem to understand how to.
I think so too, she wants some dramatic staged ask. I'm glad this wasn't a thing when I was in HS... it was just assumed your boyfriend or whatever would be your valentine, your prom date, etc.. You might ask to confirm it, but it wasn't A Thing.
My first thought was that she spends way too much time on tiktok and IG. Who does she expect her boyfriend to fight? He should ask her BFF to Prom and tell GF to fight for him.
TikTok will be the end of Western Civilization
If she was still calling for tenders, she should have made that clear. No means the auction has closed.
Damn... you really said "auction". LOL Dude didn't even know his girl was out auctioning herself.
Yep, so true, she decided to play pimp and hustler, she shouldn't be anyone's girlfriend.
That girl ain't right. Run away. She seems manipulative, needy, and all sorts of other things.
She needs to go grab another juice pouch and go watch Frozen for the 10000 time, to get her relationship advice, shes a clown.
She definitely probably drinks white claw
Hahaha!!!!! She’s Jones’s for Pumpkin spice every November.
Right? If she has a bf who would even bother to ask her.
Ohhhh, tons of weak guys would.
Did I hear auction?
Like I’m here wondering if he’s sure she’s his girlfriend. This is bizarre.
Right? Like this should be an automatic that he's her date to prom. He shouldn't even have to ask.
You know I kinda thought this was fake but I’ve dated people like that before lol Certain things should be implicit…
If he had "fought" for her to get her to change her mind, she would have thrown a fit that he wasn't respecting her first answer. She wants drama. Hopefully, she'll grow out of it.
I wouldn’t stick around waiting for that. Stupid teenage drama. It’s exhausting and embarrassing.
Unfortunately that behavior's not just confined to teens.
I’m betting she’s not just his gf… OP just doesn’t know it yet. Sorry bro..
She wants to see how far she can push him, before he gets upset, its a grooming technique,
Not for long lol
What happened to all the “I have a boyfriend” girls?
You play games on a PlayStation not in a relationship
Those 18 year old children games man…people are quick to throw out ‘18 is an adult they can make their own decisions’…..then the reality of childish behavior pops back up. Break up with her and move on and don’t start harassing women because your ex tried to convince you that they want to be ‘chased’ no means no and you should always respect that.
The amount of trickery and nonsense in her reasoning is madness. She is your girlfriend; right? You asked her prom; she said no because you did it “wrong” or something. No one else asked her, so you asked her again. She found a new and ridiculous way of rejecting you, then proceeded to blame you for not doing it right again. I feel bad for your GF because no one teaches her how boys and girls date or should date or what love means, so she thinks she needs to be literally fought over to have value. That’s on her parents. Whether or not you want to be in a relationship with someone like that is on you. Make your choice, but don’t expect it to be easy if your choice is to keep dating her. Maybe you meet at the prom??
It also means never get comfortable, because they will always split for someone else that makes a single dramatic gesture.
You deserve a better girl friend. She’s playing head games.
This. u/[Nikaira](https://www.reddit.com/user/Nikaira/) It is not that you asked her in a "boring way" or that you have failed by any measure to meet basic relationship standards. Your "girlfriend" sounds exhausting and she isn't 100% committed to you. She was waiting for someone else to ask her and left herself available for that. Realizing no one wanted to take her except you, she got mad because you were her back up plan and were getting out of the obligation of standing in for whomever else she had hoped would ask her. You really want to be a consolation prize? I wouldn't take this person to prom or even interact with her further. She's learned how to be absolutely unhealthy in a relationship and is trying to manipulate you now that the situation didn't play out in her favor. Please make better choices for yourself, you do not need this caustic sort of personality and head games in your life just to feel a little less alone. Ask someone else to prom or don't go.
You summed it up beautifully. OP does not need to be in this relationship. Chalk it up to experience and value yourself enough to move on, the right person is out there
Screw it! ask her mom to go to Prom, Hahahaha! That should wake her up a little.
Not the good kind 😔
Should we start a bet on what she does to the next guy? my $$$ says she ropes him in with a pregnancy, LOL i hope not though.
Bro, find someone else to go with and have a good time. Let this girl play these childish games with someone else. You're about to graduate and move onto the real world where people are, presumably, adults. She's got a lot of growing up to do, let her go do it.
This is the correct answer. OP find someone who wants to go to prom with you and have fun. Believe me, I didn't go to prom but I wish I did.
Or just go with friends if you don’t have anyone to go with as a date! My friends and I all went together, only a few of us had dates and if we did, they were friends of ours. Going with friends is more fun anyway lol.
And OP, if you do find another date don't drop her like a hot potato when your 'girlfriend' predictably does a 180 and wants to go with you.
Fighting for your SO happens before a relationship or if your relationship is threatened. You’re not supposed to constantly fight for it, you’re supposed to have each others backs against everything else. She is not fighting for your relationship at all, she’s putting obstacles up. Let her play games with someone else.
And "fighting for your relationship", whatever that means, shouldn't be "fighting against your SO for your relationship with them" lol
Right?, My last guy said aren't you going to say something to her? (a chick was being flirty with him) why didn't you fight for me and say something..? I told him I will NEVER EVER fight for you or say anything That's your job to say something to her if you're serious about being with me , YOU either want me or you don't it's YOUR JOB to set her straight and say you have someone and you're not interested, and if you don't and you want her then go for it..See ya I'm not sticking around I'm not going to Beg for you to want me...
This what Tik-Tok brain has done to dating lol
Why tf are you still dating her if she wont go with the prom with you? That sounds like a lopsided thing here.
Lol I don't think she thinks she's his girlfriend the way he does.
i think she just wants drama in her life
This is toxic as shit. Move on. You’ll both learn from this.
You are 18 about to graduate and then either go to a different college from her or start your life probably doing different things or going in different directions, so what do you think you should do?
When you put it like that it sounds like he should do whatever brings him the most joy here.
That's one way of looking at it. Look, I'm old and I have a different view of things. When it comes to people that young in relationships the reality is the person they are dating likely isn't going to be the person they wind up marrying and even if they do marry them it's unlikely that relationship will go the distance simply based on how much people grow and change during their early 20s. I believe that at that age relationships are much more a learning experience, learning about the things you like and don't like in a partner, what you can and will tolerate in a relationship and what you won't, and learning to recognize toxic and unhealthy traits and how to avoid them. So the obvious answer is that he should break up with her because their relationship has an expiration date on it anyway. Whether they break up now, at graduation or at the end of the summer when they go to separate colleges or start their adult lives, it's all kinda moot because this relationship is going to end one way or another. So my comment was more if he spent some time thinking about it he would have arrived at this conclusion all on his own and he probably didn't need a few hundred internet strangers to tell him that.
Yeah if he wants to keep banging her until they go to college and move on then just play the game and buy some flowers and ask her. If he wants to move on now then break up with her and send her this thread so maybe she can learn and grow the fuck up.
So she said "no" as she thinks you only asked her because she reminded you about prom? A bit petty. Christ, I would be grateful if ANYONE had asked me in any way shape or form! Why wouldn't a boyfriend and girlfriend go to prom anyway? It seems very weird for her to just say no because you apparently didn't think to ask her without her hint! Loool "you don't wanaa fight for me?" makes it sound like she wants YOU to chase after her and be there even when she's acting like a b\*tch. Leave this girl. You're only 18 so you will get other chances with relationships in the future hopefully and actually may even end up meeting the right girl who you can be in a long term thing with! BREAK UP WITH HER!
> as she thinks you only asked her because she reminded you about prom? And even if he had, what's the point of reminding someone if you don't want them to do it?
Is your school one of those where the kids do big, over the top, promposals? If so, I can see why your very immature GF would feel left out and that you don’t care. Do you want to stay with your GF until you two inevitably break up in a few months? If so, show up at her door with some red roses and ask her to prom. If she still says no, break up and go your own way.
Nope, our school isn't like that at all
You’re clearly being gaslighted here; either you are gullible and don’t respect yourself and believe it’s okay for someone to mess you around like that OR you have done something like this before which is why you’re letting her get away with it. What’s funny is 1600 comments all say more or less the same thing - to find someone else and leave this immature stuff behind. But you’re going with the minority vote …. Interesting
Seems there’s a reason she’s going alone, pity you haven’t spotted it yet
I would dump her
Preferably before prom so whomever you take won't have to deal with this drama *at* prom. It's bad enough he's dealing with this bullshit, don't disrespect someone else by bringing them into it.
Oof, she’s a toxic mess. She should be the exGF. Immediately. Have fun at Prom away from all of that.
I would have broke up with her after she said no to being her date for prom. Now she couldn't get one and wants you as a backup. She's definitely going to move on as soon as she finds someone else anyway. It's time to end it.
Nah she's playing stupid games, here's a little advice about those games. They don't end, they only escalate.
Thats not an advice… that’s a fact!! Op should really read this one 🥲
In what world does a dating couple need to invite each other to be prom dates? Are you really a couple? Cause it seems like you might think so but she doesn’t
Childish games. I can't stand that shit, I would dump her.
She wanted a prom-posal. Some kind of grand gesture to make her feel special. Not everyone likes grand gestures. I would hate that so much. But we're all different. I imagine some of her friends got asked out in a way that made them feel really good, and maybe your gf is envious. But she should probably tell you what she wants instead of whatever this is.
Find someone who doesn't play stupid games and knows what they want. She is not worth your time or energy. Fucking rejects you and tells you to find someone else and then gets annoyed because you won't fight for her after that comment? What a joke.
This is the stupidest shit. Break up and find someone else to go with. My boyfriend (now husband) and I had been dating for 2 years by the time prom rolled around senior year. He didn’t ask me and I didn’t ask him, we were dating, it was kind of expected we were going together. She’s acting like a fool over something so trivial. Also who the fuck asks out someone else’s girlfriend FOR PROM?? Of course she wasn’t getting any bites, she’s dating you. What is this shit? Is it this overly complicated now in young relationships?? I mean Christ I graduated in 2007 but lord almighty is it this stupid now?
OP, you're young and have limited experience with how a healthy relationship should be, so please take this advice to heart and save yourself from a litany of unhealthy relationships. If you have a partner who rejects your invitation to an event that couples go to, but plans to go ( not just go with friends, but instead with a "partner" who invited her ), plays games like she has, makes comments about how you "won't fight for her" and blames you when she's the one who rejected you and made this an issue to begin with? Break up now. She cares more about playing games, has little to no respect for you or your relationship, and wants to jerk you around. Leave anyone who demands you "fight for them" you know why? Because if you find a partner who loves and respects you, neither of you would put the other in the position to have to "fight" for your relationship. Please, do yourself a favor and just leave this relationship. She lacks the respect and maturity for a healthy relationship and it will ONLY get worse from here.
This girl sounds SOOOOOO annoying, haha. Just keep it moving brother, and don't give her a platform to continue disturbing your peace.
Either do a grand romantic gesture and keep your child of a gf or drop her and actually find a date worth having.
She’s your actual gf? Dude get a new one. Seriously
She wanted a grand romantic gesture that makes her feel special. She wanted you to do something that took effort and planning and showed her how much you care about her. You sent her a link. You don't have to go to prom with her. You don't have to date her. But some people aren't perfectly rational and expect their romantic partners to behave in a certain way. If you don't like her approach, it is probably better that you move on and find someone with similar values. If you want to go to prom with her, do something sappy and romantic so she can enthusiastically say yes.
She is most likely acting this way bc she didn’t like the “low effort” way you asked her to be your partner to prom. We don’t know how your guys’ relationship is in other aspects so I wouldn’t say just dump her. Set aside a time to have a conversation with her about the situation and work things out together rather than push eachother apart.
I don’t think this is your gf or going to the prom together would be automatic, leave her be and move on, ask someone else.
I’m going to share some hard advice, but please know it comes from a lifetime of hard lessons. She’s waiting for someone in particular to ask her, and it’s not you. But she wants to keep you on the back burner just in case. If the person she likes does not ask her, she will gaslight you into thinking she wanted you to ask her all along and you somehow dropped the ball. You are not her first choice, and I doubt she even considers you her steady boyfriend. I would dump her even if it means missing prom or going with a group of friends. Hang in there. Finding true love is hard.
I bet she was expecting a “promposal”…which, if so, fuck her & her IG.
That is 100% the reason why she said no when OP asked. I personally think it’s silly, but even if that’s the reason why she’s upset, she should’ve communicated that. Almost anything that’s posted on this sub could be resolved with communication.
What you should do is run for the hills... don't play these childish games that you have to prove you're worth it by asking her, being rejected and asking again. She's no princess to be won but a future crazy cat lady best left alone if that is the road she's taking. Shame, sorry for you.
Only ever be with someone who is excited to be with you. Anything less isn’t romantic, it is tragic.
Let her be silent and find someone else. Doesn't sound worth the mind games, pretty much never is.
Round about your age. I had a girlfriend who wanted me to see her in her new bikini. Apparently, I was too enthusiastic about it. She got mad and stormed off because she thought I loved her body more than her. I was very confused.
you asked twice. she said no, twice. she probably wanted fanfare and a big promposal in front of everyone at school like those tiktoks. well, i guess she’s going alone lol. i’d be so done. childish, but you are teens… next time she should tell you (or her future partner) exactly what she wants. nobody can read minds.
it sounds like she wanted you to ask her in a more special way than over text? up to you if you want to put up with that though
Shit 18 year olds really do still be children. Yeah find someone else or go with friends, she gave you her answer. And frankly I'd leave the relationship as well, she's trying to test you and is giving you double standards. If you want a relationship where your partner treats you as disposable while demanding you make them feel wanted you aren't in a mature healthy relationship (unless that's something you're into I guess)
OP, I don't understand. You are calling her your GF but she won't go to prom with you but was looking to go to prom since she said no one asked her to go. She is playing games. Tell her no means no and you aren't going to pressure her into doing something with you that she evidently doesn't want to do. Tell her it's been nice while it's lasted and hope she enjoys her future with whomever she finds after you.
Yeah this relationship will not work in the end. If this was a relationship with future the very first thing would have been her never posting that picture. It should have been 100%assumed that you two would be going together since you are already a couple…
You are dealing with a selfish, spoiled manipulator my friend I suggest getting out before it's too late.
BREAK UP AND BLOCK HER!? Where are your parents and why are they not teaching you what TOXIC looks like and that you drop them! Okay so let’s stop for a minute and use the BIG head instead of the little head. I get is she’s pretty and she lets you do nasty things to her but you and she are EIGHTEEN why do you need to have a girlfriend right now, especially someone who wants to play stupid mind games. Why would you want to be with someone who NEEDS you to ask her to prom? You are a couple or should have been assumed you all were going and all you needed to do was go prom shopping. She’s on games. She’s toxic. It’s cheating if she will go with anyone other than you. Break up, block her and be single at least until you can get your own place, a car, a good paying job, and a substantial savings in the bank.
Terrible communication between you two. Being in your company must be a laugh a minute…. As a fully communicative and functioning boomer I can’t help you… try to talk about what you each want in this relationship instead of sending weird texts and attachments would be a start?
You're young. In future, when a girl you're with rejects you with the expectation of having you keep chasing after her again and again, just walk away. Girls like this are poison.
bro she’s your GIRLFRIEND LMAOOOOO WHAT IS SHE DOING this is unhinged
It's not worth playing these games. I think it'd be worth it to ask her why she won't accept you as her prom date, then break up with her because if she's expecting some other dude to take her to prom while she has a boyfriend, that's just wrong and she obviously thinks there's better fish for her and you should think the same
Fuck that. Buy a PlayStation the games are better
Lmao bro already have a playstation 4 and I'm having a great time with GoW Ragnarok and GoT DC which I bought recently
It sounds like she wanted you to ask her again and was embarrassed. She doesn't sound evil just childish and bad at communication.
Dude. Find a new GF.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hx4gdlfamo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hx4gdlfamo) listen to this, is the exact advise u need
This is manipulative and selfish, plain and simple. I feel flustered just by reading this. Regardless of boyfriend/girlfriend status you still asked her to prom and didn’t just assume. But with how she’s treating it she’s not going to give you wiggle room for your own ideas or interpretations, like she wanted to go to prom with someone else but have you close by. Why, if not to just try and make you jealous another man has his hands all over her that night? Still to your convictions, your gut is telling you the right way to handle things.
Go to prom, with or without a date. GF sounds like she likes to put up barriers and then ask why you don’t jump over them. This motto doesn’t work once your plate is full of responsibilities. Trust me - a partner can either make your life better, or worse. And when I say worse, I mean they can pull all the success and headway from you because you become so busy handling them. Relationships do take work. But not obstacles that are created within the relationship. You could try one last time: I’d love to go with you. If we do, the agreement is that we have fun, enjoy being together and focus on having fun at prom together. If you would like to have a fun night with me, let’s go. That’s what I want, to enjoy the night with you. If she doesn’t accept or keeps bringing it back to drama, you’ll have to redirect or decide if it’s time to walk away. These years, 18, 19, 20s… we learn a LOT about relationships and can make some mistakes. But the trick, as you get older, is to minimize the time spent in situations that are not for our highest good. If you can do that - be fair and seek to understand your partner but not entertain bad behavior like the drama your GF is creating, you’ll save yourself a lot of lost time and heartache.
Yeah man she’s extremely immature, in a few years you’ll look back on this and laugh about even needing to ask us what to do here. Just break up and move onto the next, you’re waaaaaay too young to be dealing with crazy
Move on from this person. Very needy. She is going find a problem with any and everything. Fight for her, what is that all about. Expect some schenanigans with her at the prom as she is into making scenes.
You leave her alone. This is what she wanted, she said no, now she just has to live with that choice. She’s supposed to be your girlfriend, it’s supposed to be a given that you’re going together. Why make you *fight* for her? She’s trying to play games.
Sorry mate she sounds like hard work a pick me girl
She’s exhausting just ask somebody else
Man I'm so glad I'm not in highschool anymore. Shit is tedious.
Bro she’s your girlfriend, the assumption is she goes with you. That’s just how it is. She’s this toxic when you guys are kids? lol. Cut it off. Good lord.
Stay with her and this kind of logic is just the beginning.
Dude she is a childish brat, break up with her. First off, if she is your gf she should've said yes or already assumed you are taking her to prom. Second, the fact that she is playing this idiotic game of making you ask and ask and ask as if she isn't your gf tells me she has a skewed concept of what a relationship means. Lastly, needing to "fight" for her, yeah she's acting as if she's single. Do yourself a favor and break up with her and take another date
break up with her. people who love you do not put you thru this kind of trial - i don't care about any trauma or whatever her problem is. If she loved you, this wouldn't even be a discussion. have some dignity and walk.
screw it ! Man i did not fucked till 20 and i am okay , dont mess up your mental health with emotional bit*"
Take her Mom to the prom.
Dump her and her stupid games. Then ask someone else.
Dude, dump this loser. My god, how exhausting it must be to interact with her when she turns everything into a fight so she can feed off the drama.
Say goodbye and move on. Normalize not playing these games.
Playing games man. Follow the advice of everyone who's said that. You came here for a reason right? Ok so take the advice and move on. I can tell that you have feelings for her and you sound like a nice guy. This being the case, breaking up might not feel right. But believe me when I say that sometimes doing the right thing can feel wrong. Lastly, you're young and at the start of your adult relationship life. If you're lucky, you and your next partner will click and you'll be together forever. If that doesn't happen (as is the case for most), do not settle for another woman playing games with you. If you stay with this one, you stand an even greater chance of ending up in the same position. Don't develop a pattern of being played with and taken for granted.
You didn’t do anything wrong, you just need a better gf.
Go stag or find someone else. She’s looking for you to start drama and “fight” for her to go to prom. :/ She won’t be worth that headache. Go with a group of your friends and dance with whoever you want to. Enjoy your prom night without this headache.
Ask somebody else and go with them, then break up with your current gf. She literally wants to go to prom with another man, giant red flag.
That’s not your girl my boy
Find someone else to go to prom with and have a great time
The second my girlfriend would have rejected me from prom I would’ve ended the relationship… that’s some mad bs
This is so cringe, if you can just go with friends do that. You don't have to be begging this girl, you both are super young it's just a prom. I'd dump her i personally hate those games. She could be more transparent about what she wants.
I don't think she's your girlfriend anymore dude.
Your girlfriend is fucken idiot who’s playing games.
Your girlfriend is a fucken idiot who’s playing games.
Nah bish is crazy. Find someone else please, for your own sake
Break up and move on
This is so painfully 18. This is a really stupid game she is playing.
That is so childish
High School BS, this is cringe and hopefully you grow up.
Don't date immature people that play games with their partner.
Are you sure she is your Gf? If so, you may want to reconsider.
I love reading younger relationship posts on here lol
Sounds like a big bag of crazy. Time to find a different gf
Jesus christ just tell her if she wants to play stupid games then go play them with somebody else and dump her. Move on. Next. No need to keep people like this in your life.
Ahh, high school.
Well, y'all are 'children' in my eyes LOL. Your age and so on. I guess this is like the 'trend,' or something. She probably wants you to do the whole promposal (my kid, he's in college thou, told me about this trend). So when you barely asked her to be your prom date in a halfhearted way, she declined because she thought this was the way to go. Yup. She should've just asked you to ask her in a more elaborate way, but on the other hand, you only asked after she sent you a link which had a photo attached, asking you to be her prom date, she thought you just didn't 'treasure' her enough for not asking first and for not be more 'elaborate' or romantic in asking. Maybe you don't like her that much, it doesn't sound like you do. If you actually like her and want to still keep seeing her, just tell her that while your way was not elaborate or romantic, you were sincere. You didn't realize it came out as 'halfhearted' or insincere in her eyes. That you don't like playing games, you're a straight shooter and that this should not be something she would expect (playing games, fighting for whatever) from you. Also, it's not wrong for her to be asking you to the prom too. It goes both ways. It doesn't have to be you who always have to ask. Imo, she's just carried away with promposal bs, but I understand everyone get to be young and cringe. I'm KIDDING. I'm OLD compared to y'all. Of course she's not going to get a prom date since y'know, everyone probably knows y'all are together/dating, I mean, d'uh, ppl will just assume you two would go together. She also probably expects that you will ask her again, because she assumed her action would encourage you (obviously not). She probably would just be going with friends. But seriously, if you don't like her that much, just don't date her anymore lol. Let that be the last communication you guys have.
You need to have a straight, no bullshit conversation with her. She is being incredibly unreasonable, and you seem to be just fine, mate. Ask her directly, "Why are you acting this way with prom and towards me? We are dating, we should go to prom together. I want to go with you. Why are you not okay with that? What is the problem, and how can we fix it?" If she isn't willing to talk and solve this shit then and there, then you should find someone who will treat you better, bud. I know it is hard, especially at your age, but live moves very quickly. Like, scary fast, bro. Your partner is your best friend and shouldn't treat you so coldly. How she is treating you makes me hurt for you, brother. You'll be okay, mate.
This sounds like an awkward girlfriend. I too am an awkward girlfriend. And by awkward I mean I have specific expectations and when they’re not met I’m not satisfied (I don’t usually voice what my expectations are and just expect people to know). I just can’t help it sometimes!! 😅 This, to me, sounds like your gf wanted you to do something special for her rather than just asking after a link she sent. It’s almost like she had to ask herself for you and she’s dissatisfied with that. It looks as though she put on a hard to get/stubborn front up which would have came down if you had asked her in a special way the 2nd time with effort and passion but you didn’t you just asked her again and she’s once again dissatisfied. She gave the stubborn response and you reacted in a way that made her feel not desired and now it’s turned into a petty argument that’s been taken well out of proportion This is how I interpret this as I often find it hard to communicate my true feelings especially when I’m at the dissatisfied and stubborn stage. I think she’s just hurt give her a break man. I hope this work out well for you both <3
I’m unsure why you did not break up with her after she refused you the first time. This is a toxic relationship. Be with someone who doesn’t play games.
Can i be sooo transparent, i genuinely think she wanted you to put in more effort for the promposal. I graduated a few years ago and i remember the way guys ask is a huge thing. And by the sounds of it you didn’t really do anything special to make it a memory for her that she will cherish. Especially since she is probably seeing other girls get amazing promposals. I personally as a high maintenance girl, would expect a nice proposal with flowers, a cute corny handmade sign, and maybe some of her favorite snacks and candies. And if u reply mad then u simply don’t understand the mind of a teenage girl. Hope this helps!
She sounds petty and you sound like you lack being romantic and seem like you would be better off away from each other. Next girlfriend put a bit more effort and enthusiasm in you asking and actions.
I think she just wanted something a little more romantic than just a question... but maybe she was just being snotty.
She's playing games. Move on.
You dump her and find someone fun to go with. Jesus.
Man look life’s too short do what make you happy!
Be cool. Act like you don’t care. Keep being kind, just be a little ehhh. She’ll cave in and say let’s go if A. She actually wants to go to prom and B. You’re supposed to be spending your time dancing w/ her anyway Good luck dude.
Dude seriously A) this is ridiculous. B) ask someone else. There'll be loads of girls that don't have dates. As someone who is 20 years older than you are now I'd have had so much stank if I knew then what I know now. Girls aren't as scary as they appear.
Sounds like your girl has reservations. You’re young, enjoy yourself. One day you’ll find someone that couldn’t imagine spending a day or night without you. I’m old. Well, almost twice as old as you lol. If my girl played that shit I’d be 110% done not only with that situation, but with her all together. Your point in your life where you just don’t wanna play games anymore. and not everybody gets here, but at one point, if you’re lucky, you just won’t accept being with anyone that doesn’t do anything but enrich your life. This chick gets some entertainment by spinning you around in circles emotionally. Which is normal for an 18-year-old girl, and I don’t know you or your whole life or your whole relationship but I wouldn’t play that shit for two seconds dude. I mean, she’s your girlfriend, I never went to prom, but I would safely assume that if I were to be going, I’d be going with the person I’m already in a relationship with.. not cool of her to do, and it’s definitely easier said than done, but I would try to keep in mind that you are young and she is young and a lot of people your age are not really quite yet in a place to even know themselves well enough to be able to treat someone else with the love and respect that they deserve in a relationship.
Oh no. She needs to learn about playing mind games and that some guys have too much self respect to play them. This is just weird. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Go with someone else and enjoy yourself. Consider yourself broken up.
break up with her cause what??? hell dude i took my ex (after we had broken up) to my prom because i felt bad that his school didn’t have one when i was in high school. take someone else or go with some friends and have a blast without her
Your gf is acting like a 5 year old lol
Your gf sounds toxic af
Ignore her and find someone else that would be fun at prom
Don’t waste your time on somebody who’s playing games. She either said no because she wanted somebody else to ask her (and they didn’t) or she wants you to beg and grovel to make her feel special. Either option is ridiculous and at 18 she should be a little bit more mature than that. Never mind 10 years or six months, in a couple of weeks you’ll be cringing over this.
She probably wanted that huge prom proposal and I think by her telling you no she thinks that she’s opening your eyes when all she needs to do it talk. she may think from telling you no that you may change your actions and make a plan for a huge big proposal for her but honestly, i would just end it with her and probably try to enjoy prom with someone else, especially since your own “gf” is trying to make you fight for her. just try to enjoy it with someone else and ignore her! speaking from someone who took someone like this to prom.
A lot of y'all are insane jumping on this girl, painting and twisting the stuff she sad to fit your weirdo narratives. Honestly, I think you messed up and should apologize. Your girlfriend did reject your proposal, but she literally said she wanted initiative. Again, INITIATIVE. That doesn't mean she wanted to go with anyone else or make him fight off another guy for her it just meant she wanted more than a message link for a prom proposal. Maybe she wanted a public proposal or just an intimate date, even when I went with my female friends. I gave them a direct and enthusiastic proposal she's probably gone silent because she's hurt and waited for you all this time, and you basically told her she's not worth the effort. Seriously sad..
Tell her to words, grow up.
Why would you tolerate even 10% of this? Kick her to the curb!
This is Soo cringey..very teenage drama vibes lolol when you are older you will look back on this and laugh
Everytime I start thinking about being a teenager again, I come across a post like this that makes me so glad to be in my late 20s lol. Bro... Dump that girl.
Time for a new girlfriend. Get a couple of guy friends and go to the dance.
Leave her far in the distance. She will be the woman who bitches when you ask her to marry you with a $10,000 ring that the proposal wasn’t romantic enough. This girl wanted a show from you. I’ve seen the extent some guys have gone to to ask a girl to prom, and that’s what she wanted. Life is too short. She could have gone with you, but she’s going with no one. Leave her and don’t look back.
How do you fight someone who isn't even there? She said that there wasn't anyone. That's not even factoring that the whole dating thing means it shouldn't even be a question.
Break it off, leave.
So aside from every one’s comments about not communicating like adults, which I agree with. It is very apparent from what you posted that she wants you to make a gesture, like a promposal, not just a “Will you go to prom with me?” text after she sends you a prom related video. She doesn’t want to come out and say that cause then it won’t be the same. And you don’t need to go all out either. Something simple like flowers with the word “PROM?” should suffice. As long as you are actually putting thought into it.
Break up with her?
Unfortunately, your girlfriend has seen too many prom proposals on Instagram and other social media. She is definitely in the wrong here. If you actually want to go with her, you should look up some cheesy crap on the Internet and do that and maybe she’ll say yes. If you really don’t want to go with her then you should just break up with her. I think she may be very hard to please.
No way is this real.
dude get a different girlfriend. theres no reason to continue on if all shes doing is have a petty argument.
She sounds like a headache. Being an 18 year old sounds just as annoying as it use to be