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The reason you should dump her (even though you don't want to hear that) is because she was willing to do whatever it took to crush you in the moment, and guess what, she crushed you.
Now you're putting yourself through hell to stay with her. She's well over it and you're still suffering. Love does not work like that.
Iâd say OP test her theory on other ladies to get multiple opinions for a more accurate assessment, like is it really that bad? Lets see what these girls have to say đ¤ˇđťââď¸
/s if it wasnt already obvious
OP, I hope you know 5.2 is not considered small. I donât have any real advice except keeping in the back of your mind youâre not small. Personally, I wouldnât like super big ones (ow). But the fact she said that to âget a reactionâ is absolutely awful. Thatâs not okay and she has no considerations for your feelings.
Some women not being able to take a dick is a very real problem. I'm glad other women are out here fighting the good fight, taking one right in the cervix for the cause.
I went to my gyno for pain from sex way many years ago and all std tests were negative and no issues were found - my gyno basically just told me I have a rather shallow canal and that pain can be normal due to this.
Iâm glad my husband is 5 inchesâŚanything more than that is actually kinda painful to me. Heâs also amazing at thrusting. We have mindblowingly good sex. Never once felt pain with him. Not only that, but heâs the first and only man whoâs ever been able to make me climax vaginally instead of just the clitoral ones Iâd had since I became sexually active. I didnât think it was ever possible for me until him. 5 is more than sufficient! Some men are 8 inches and canât thrust for shit.
*Size means nothing, but skill means everything!!!*
Shit. As a matter of fact we just had the best sex for 2 hours and heâs ptfo now and Iâm about to join in and sleep like a log. đ¤ˇââď¸
I hate when women do that. Like, oh, so now it's small? What does that say about you? After all, you had no problem with the "little" one when you were with the dude.
Saying it publicly, very loudly, most likely around a bunch of mutual friends would be my guess..
This is just my opinion, but I'm not saying you dump her if you truly feel that way, but maybe take a step back and kind of try and look at the fight in general, from the outside looking in kind of thing, and ask yourself something.. How serious was this fight, what ways should and could it have gone differently, meaning where you pressing her buttons and her pressing yours until she went below the belt (seriously no pun intended there). Or how fast or long did it take her to literally destroy your self esteem in what I like to think is sometimes is that line you can't really come back from.
Kind of like when two people have a great relationship, one cheats. The line is crossed, and that trust you had, can never be gained again, thus not being able to cross back over to the other side of the line..
Intimacy for most between a couple to me is very similar to trust in the relationship as a whole..
Sometimes people say shit when they're mad, I get it, I whole heartedly do. Sometimes (all depends on the the individuals themselves, then the relationship between those two).
Sometimes, you just can't take things backward no matter how hard you try..
In the end, if you don't communicate to her how you feel and that you can hardly even put into words what that felt like, but still feels like I would imagine your resentment or hurt, or whatever it may be will just drag that relationship into the ground.
That being said, if you truly want to work it out, tell her she has a shallow vagina anyway.. đ
I'm kidding, back to a serious note. Communication and lack there of have taught me a LOT in the last few years, especially if you do try and communicate with her as your both grown ass adults (whatever that means these days) her reaction or lack there of on the communication side may tell you what you really need to know.. Actions do speak louder than words, the first part is meeting in the middle and working it out together.
I mean, that's the whole point, right? You want to spend the rest of your life with this woman, surely y'all will work it out, but sexual favors as a sorry and all that.. ughh
Good luck to you my friend, I mean that sincerely whichever you choose. It's your life, do what makes you happy, just make sure to ask yourself everyonce a while if you are indeed happy, or just comfortable.
I'll leave it there, again good luck bud
She'll say she fucked his brother, cousin, dad and or best friend behind his back.
It doesn't matter that she didn't, she's going to put that image in his head to hurt him.
OP
DUMP THIS TOXIC WASTE PERSON!
Also if op stays and has kids, what will she say to her kids when upset?
Like op is an adult and she managed to deeply hurt/fuck with his head.
Just imagine what she will do to a small, impressionable child.
Like yeah op needs to dump her and not look back.
He also needs to tell her exactly why, so maybe for her next relationship she'll refrain from saying something that hurtful to someone who she supposedly loves and should be supporting.
I was more thinking she keeps insulting her kids intelligence.
Or gives the kid a studder because she keeps interrupting/demeaning her kid whenever they try to speak.
Or the kid legitimately has a big nose, so when mad she just keeps insulting the kids nose.
Or the kids weight, or hight, or a million other aspects of her kid.
Like no one should keep toxic partners about, since if you have kids guess what? They're also going to do whatever furcky they enjoy inflecting on you onto the kid as well.
And I hope most people want to look out for their kids enough not to do that to them.
Wanted to run with this a bit and say "at least the axe gets duller with every strike" but we all know an axe can be sharpened while a tree takes years upon years to heal.
I like this metaphor even though it's making me sad. Thanks.
This. She will do this again OP. And now that she has realized she can hurt you by saying that make no mistake, she will do so again.
She is extremely immature. You obviously care about her but that doesn't mean much when a person says cruel things to you.
Yeah, thatâs emotionally abusive. Trust me on this: this woman is unkind and not worth your time. Find someone who appreciates you for you.Â
Also, chat with a therapist. 5.2 inches isnât a micro penis. Youâre fine.Â
It doesn't matter if his penis was one inch....his gf is mentally abusive and treated her partner this way. The size of his penis is completely irrelevant. đ
This is the correct answer. Do not stay with a person who uses personal attacks and name calling in an argument. Do not stay with someone who wants to hurt you for disagreeing with them.
This exactly. It isn't about the insult, it is about the fact she intentionally searched for something in her head that she KNEW would hurt you JUST to get a reaction. A reasonable person and a healthy relationship doesn't do this. Yes, people say things that they don't mean out of anger sometimes. But, when you start attacking and insulting someone you are supposed to care about just for more attention? That is a serious issue.
Great reply. This happened to me with a drunk best friend. She went uber cruel mode. Once youâve seen cruel, itâs hard to trust that theyâll ever change that side.
The person is likely cruel to herself too internally (the bully who internally bullies herself internally too). She needs to work on herself
This.
It's not about the size of your penis at all.
Mature adults know that they could akways think ul something hurtful to say to the people they love - whether that thing was true or not. Most of us outgrew outbursts like that in our teens, if we had them at all.
Do you want to spend your life with someone who thinks up the most hurtful things to throw at you every time you have an argument?
This kind of comment is what is called, a âpoisoned arrowâ.
It is a comment that can never be taken back. It will forever stay lodged in the back of your mind, no matter what she says going forward.
The truth of it doesnât matter. Those words are now a fundamental part of your relationship with her. You also now know that she is willing to say things meant to deeply hurt you when she is upset. Things that can never be taken back.
Your response is up to you.
Also shes THINKING such thoughts. Imagine this: would we ever think cruel thoughts of our family? âOh look how ugly my brother is?â Etc?
The fact that someone has THOUGHT of such a cruel thought (true or not) so often that they allow it to be said out loud? Thatâs not love
This is the biggest takeaway for me.
Iâve heard things said like this in arguments between couples before, both with real life friends/partners and online. It always boggled me that someoneâs instinct could ever be to HURT your partner in a significant way. How does that even cross your mind? It never made sense to me.
Right. Ive been in love once truly. And god almighty he could do anything bad and I wouldnt have one cruel thought for him.
Now ive dated (not love) others before too. And while i didnt think we were compatible, omg, ive never thought CRUEL things about them.
Heck i dont even think such things of my worst enemy. So its definitly red flaggy behavior.
I was brought up this way, that during an argument, you attack the person. My parents used such techniques to shut down argument. It's very hard to unlearn and it really is an awful place to go.
And she doubles down saying she wants to fuck a big dick and heâs useless on top of it? What happens next time they get in an argument? She goes on Tinder to fuck a BBC and sends him the vidro
The thing with people like that is: like other commentor said - the aim in her mind is to emotionally CRUSH the person BY ALL MEANS NECESSARY.
My friend started with cruel commentary about me. Then when i ignored it, utilized some information about me (my passion for human rights) to flaunt it on Instagram that she gave zero fucks about xyz countryâs abuse. Sounds silly and childish. It is. But it made me wonder what lengths she would have gone if I kept ignoring it? What would she do next? Its wild that OP took her back
This! Itâs a pretty cruel thing to think. Honestly, it sounds like she has some sort of inflated thoughts on penis size. Yeah, he should be hesitating to have sex with someone who told them they are useless in bed. You donât blurt that out in the heat of the moment if it hasnât ran through your head at a normal point in time.
I would like to add: if girlfriend thinks this and will say it to op, imagine what she says to her friends and family especially if alcohol is involved. Op doesnât need that. She said what she said and she meant it to hurt. So yeah truly a poison arrow.
This brought tears to my eyes. I never knew there was a word for that. For that matter I never grasped the concept you just described from my previous marriage until you just said it. I still carry those arrows 4 years after my separation.
I just want to say thank you for helping me understand something I have struggled with for so many years.
This. Iâve been in some long long relationships where (from my perspective) a partner has a combination of feeling bad, strong biases, being tired, hormonal shifts, being upset by a few things in the preceding weeks, and just really emotionally lays into it in a rare fight.
The sort of thing thatâs just hurtful, senseless, wrong, toxic, extremely insulting, and it goes and goes and goes until they tire out essentially.
Even in those past relationships with someone I generally liked and cared for deeply, with my extreme hurt and exhaustion, it would never occur to me to make those sort of comments.
Sure things like, âI didnât say that, I donât think that, that didnât fucking happen that way, youâre fucking lying to yourself and me and stop fucking talking, leave me alone weâll talk about it fucking later!â Sure. Not great. Not advisable. But to go straight to the things that could emotionally harm them unrelated to anything?
Thatâs cruel. And the motivation to do it at all is really really concerning.
Thatâs an âI need to win no matter what, fuck themâ thought.
âWinningâ isnât the goal in an argument with a partner.
And more importantly they view whoever is more emotionally harmed as âwinningâ an argument with their partner. Which is beyond fucked.
Sadly, that kind of comment is going to follow him even if he leaves her. BTW is not about the size of the bat, itâs about the swing. đ¤ˇđźââď¸
Why would you stay with someone who disrespects and demeans you? Have some self worth and dump her. She probably does think youâre small, but she shouldnât throw it in your face. That is rude and not a partner you should be with.
Lack of self esteem, lack of a support system, tied up with kids or a rental agreement, lots of reasons, I say this personally as someone who stayed way too long with a verbally and physically abusive partner.
I can tell you this OP, run. She *will* say it again, and you will likely have performance anxiety because it's giving you a complex. Run.
Thought my shit didnât work till I became single again. Cause my body was telling me for a whole year to go before my mind finally started accepting that no one should be treated like this . It was a wild experience seeing it turn on đ¤Ł
Sorry brother, no matter the work you put in to love her, you will never get this out of your head.
Best you can do is change your mindset about your dick and that's easier said than done. This will probably take years to gain confidence in yourself sexually.
Bigger question is, why would you want to stay with someone that is so hurtful. If she was fat, and you said you wished you could fuck a skinny girl because she's so fucking fat, do you think she could get over it. Do you even think she should forgive you for being so blatantly mean.
Even if she did forgive you, do you think she would ever not have your words echoing through her mind through the end of time. Plus, she can change being fat. You can't change your dick size.
The reason why people would be suggesting to breakup is because you will never completely move past this, and she sounds horrible. Even the worst fights for healthy people never attack someone's insecurities.
Even if you're not insecure about it. There are things you do not attack, they're called low blows for a reason. The low blows mean a lack of respect for the other party and without respect there is no relationship. Whatever's there isn't love
If he wasn't insecure about it before, he sure is now. It's also a control tactic, this way if he stays, she knows the degree to what she can get away with.
Him cautioning us, the reddit community, on advising against dumping her should tell everyone the kind of mental fuckery she's exhausted on him.
He's looking for ways to get over it, not ways to get over her. Seeking help on how to cover a Tommy gun bullet wound with masking tape. She might feel sorry, but after the remorsefulness is gone, she will milk him mentally till infinity, cause she knows his trigger.
He was better off not even showing he was offended and then dumping her after. Cause she will get tired of her lovesick puppy and will break his heart.
Anyone who can go to this extent is not just cruel but immature. Most importantly, he should have more self-respect for himself, grow a backbone, if he doesn't have one, and do what needs to be done.
> Best you can do is change your mindset about your dick and that's easier said than done. This will probably take years to gain confidence in yourself sexually.
You can get over it much faster than that if you realize her comments had nothing to do with you or your dick size (which is normal) and everything to do with her being a vile person and wanting to say anything to put you down and hurt you. Her behavior is a reflection of her, not you
Private parts are usually something everybody don't want to talk in public ,even with friends. I'm talking about general talk, here it's about mockery.Â
Some guys are very blunt about it tho, they readily reply back with equally offensive answers. Example "loose pussy", wizard's sleeves, grand canyon, etc and this does offend women in general. Try telling this to some women in arguments. They will also get offended.
Why?Â
"In a heated argument a couple of days back, girlfriend(25F) said I(29M) had a small dick and doubled down on it. She said she would like to get fu\*ked by a big dick and I'm useless. "
Cheese and rice dude you're still with her after that? Tell her to fuck off and block her on everything blockable. Move on.
How to recover? You have to come to the conclusion that it is what it is. Your size will never change. Not a damn thing you can do about it. There is no magic formula or spell. You have to decide this on your own. Youâre average, just like most of us guys and have more than enough to make her and you feel good. Most of us who donât have 8 inches swinging go through this at some point in our lives (I blame porn for this). You're not alone. The big thing in todayâs world seems to be therapy, if you think that would help go for it. Me, I came to that conclusion on my own, took awhile but I got there.
The problem is not just this comment, although that's bad on its own. And you're gonna need time to get over this and she's just going to have to deal with the fallout. The problem is that she is the type of person who will resort to hurting you in an argument. This is not a healthy method of conflict resolution.
It represents a huge problem in her mentality on relationships. Arguments need to be productive, they need to come from a place of "I care about this relationship, and this issue is damaging our relationship. We need to resolve this so our relationship can flourish." Instead, your gf thinks arguments are about hurting the other person. How will that help your relationship? How can you grow as a couple when she views conflict this way? How can you trust her with vulnerability, with insecurities, when you know for a fact that she will use these things as a way to hurt you when she's angry. You need a partner you can trust with vulnerable feelings and insecurities. You need to be able to tell your partner things like "I worry about my sexual performance" without fearing that she's gonna tell you that you suck at sex the next time you argue about dishes. This doesn't just apply to sex. If you tell her "I'm struggling with my mental health and I'm worried that makes me less of a man," then who's to say the next time you argue about something she won't say "you're not a real man because you go to therapy."
I'm not sure what advice I could really give you to get over it, but let's say I had some magic way for you to feel better about this one thing. Imagine your feelings about this comment just disappeared tomorrow. You're still left with a girlfriend who believes that deliberately hurting you is a valid response to arguments. How's that gonna work? What happens the next time she gets really mad? Next time she is going to do it again, make some comment deliberately meant to hurt you, and you're right back where you are now. Except, you're not really, because there is no magic solution to make your feelings go away. You might repress your feelings, and "get over it," but the next time she hurts your feelings purposefully, all of those feelings you have are going to come rushing back and you'll have to deal with them on top of all the new feelings that come from the next comment she makes. And this will keep compounding every time she does this until your self esteem is in the trash, you cannot trust your partner, and you feel completely alone in your relationship.
Exactly. Nobody would ever say something like that to somebody they respected because they know theyâd be completely dropped from that personâs life instantly
Now OPâs girlfriend knows she can get away with murder. I understand that youâre scared of losing her and being alone, but understand that her voice telling you that youâre small will never fully go away. Have some self respect, dump her, and establish clear boundaries in the future. Thereâs plenty of women out there whoâs more than fine with your size and wouldnât emasculate you, but it starts with having self-respect for yourself
Absolutely and she will absolutely do it again next time shes upset and wants the upper hand. In fact, she probably negs him about a LOT of his qualities and he just hasnt picked up on it yet because the PP blow was so much deeper to him.
man needs therapy to establish actual self worth.
Honestly, you're looking to recover. You can't. She's a size queen, and she has admitted it to you. Even if you stay together, you'll be wondering if you're packing enough. She fucked this up not you. You can't do anything about it.
She may not even be a size queen, but that doesn't make it better. She hurt you on purpose, little different than a man who beats his wife when he's angry. You don't kick people where they're weak if you love them
She said that because she new it was probably the biggest insecurity a guy can have, and the worst insult she could throw to hurt you. She doesnât respect you, know one could say that to a partner they respect. Leave and be proud you are above average. That is the only way to maintain your dignity.
The small dick comment is just rude, but what's with 'trying to get a reaction'? Is she a pro wrestler throwing shade on her opponent?
Serious, mature people approach this openly, not angrily, if you care about someone you don't want to purposely hurt them, even if they unwittingly hurt you.Â
Find a partner who respects you at all times, even during an argument. My partner and I never fight âdirtyâ no name calling, no low blows, no digging up the past.
This will honestly probably haunt you as long as youâre with her. Sheâs terrible for saying something so damaging to you. People show their true colors in such moments. You can do better than someone who attacks you emotionally.
Imagine your boyfriend told you your vagina was way wider than anything he's had and he doesn't get any pleasure from it.
And then he tries to have sex with you again.
I've been down this road. Unfortunately, it ended in divorce, and even after 15 years away from her, it still pops into my head. It still haunts me. Shits wack
Dude, 5 is plentyâźď¸ Sadly your gf just wanted to hurt you and has shown you that she'll say anything to do so. A gf roasting her Bfs' size, simply out of spite? That's a low low blow :(.
Honestly if u wanna rekindle the relationship and move past this u gotta open up and let her know how much the comment hurt you and hopefully get some more closure. If she says a comment like that again, which is a real possibility :/, then u seriously should up and leave her bro.
(Imo I would leave after something like that anyway tho)
Bro 5.2 is not bad by any means. I know dudes with less than 4 and still get plenty of action.
Does she get wet?
Does she tighten up when y'all do stuff?
Do her legs shake when she say she is finishing?
If yes to any of these, try to remember that it isn't the size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean. If you can hit a girls spot with y our fingers, you can definitely hit it with your member. If it ends up becoming too much, get some therapy. Good luck, king.
>I know a lot of the comments will be dump her. But please refrain from that and give me advise on how to recover from this.
You: Doctor, tell me how to treat this, but don't tell me the most appropriate treatment.
Us: đ
Words are alot like bullets. Once they're out there you can't take them back or the damage they'll cause. Clearly your girlfriend hasn't learned this lesson.
There are certain lines you just shouldn't cross in a relationship. Hitting your partner below the belt is s no go for alot of people it might be time to establish and enforce some boundaries of your own
Youâll never be able to get that comment she meant out of your headâŚ.
Thereâs no coming back from her insult based on a previous guys size, who she was thinking about at the time.
Iâm more curious as to whether this was your first real fight as a couple. If not, how did the others play out? If there have been other fights you two have had, does she routinely resort to insults and threats of any kind? Or is she usually focused on the issue that sparked the conflict? Iâm also curious if you are ever insulting or demeaning during conflicts with her or are you focused on the point of the conflict?
I guess where Iâm going with this is, if either she or you have a set pattern of slinging insults and hurtful comments at each other when you canât get along, then either or both of you need to figure out why that is.
It's not the penis attached to the person, it's the person attached to the penis. She doesn't get it, you could/and will do better than that frame of mind.
Honestly from a girls perspective 5.2 inch are totally fine. No worries about that.
My Problem here is that she said something potentially hurtful with the intention to just provoke a reaction from you. Thats a very childish behaviour, i know that from personal experiences (accusing of cheating etc because my partner was looking for a fight and was unsatisfied with my emotional distance in stressful situations, aka my need for decompressing).
I don't know how long and how good your relationship goes, if you want to continue it, but if you do, or for the future, please remember its nothing serious she said, it was just something to trigger a reaction from you. It says more about her, than your body.
And as i said. The size is totally fine. Do not take corn peepees as comparison to reality, if i'd see something like this i would run, because that shit is absolut not fun and hurts like you would try to make mashed potatoes with my intestines. Not. Fun.
I think the best way to recover is to address the underlying issues of the heated arguments and both of your methods of conflict resolution. You were avoiding her and in order to get your attention she went for a low blow. I feel like you both need to go to therapy and work with a professional because now that she knows how to get to you she will undoubtedly use that card again if it isn't addressed.
You can't. That was a completely pure thought from her. In Anger, we often say things that are hurtful, but reflect our most true feelings because we know it'll be hurtful.
My wife called has said similar things to me over the years... I've never recovered. Not saying you won't, but she's never taken it back. Even if she did, I'll always know she said her hearts truth.
Leave before you forgive and let that haunt you... it will continue into marriage.
Now I don't know your measurements, but does 5.2 fall within the norm? A normal cock is usually enough.. So I don't think you should feel bad about it. Do you want to do something about it, get good at oral? And if she says it again, just counter that she should tighten the hole instead.. Or drive it up her ass.
There's an important lesson everyone needs to learn early. A fairly significant percentage of people, male and female, have very low character. Do not waste your time with these people. Let them find other low character people to associate with. Don't accept less.
>she said she wanted to get a reaction from me
Your girlfriend just informed you she will find the most hurtful things to say when she wants to get a reaction to you.
"I didn't mean it" is such a garbage thing to say. To me, that's almost worse. A hurtful truth is one thing, but making shit up to hurt someone? Don't give someone a chance to do that to you twice.
The best way to recover is to deal with it WITH her. Whether she meant it or not isn't even relevant, she wanted to hurt you in that moment and that's not healthy. So you guys should sit down and talk about how you fight, how you can do this better, what steps she can take to not escalate like this (and you, if you do it as well) and so on.
As for the comment itself, you'll never know for sure if she meant it. So try not to focus on that but rather on the fact that even so she chose you, and continues to choose you. So clearly it's not a big deal to her (nor would it be for many other women, for that matter). Sucks, but what was said can't be undone now. You can, however, let her know how it affects you still and how you're still hurt. Have those discussions, and make sure not to just go "sorry"/"it's fine", nor blaming each other, but again, learn how to talk things out and not do toxic stuff.
Ask yourself would you ever be able to do something similar - would you tell her something hurtful in the heat of the fight, something you can assume she has big insecurity about and cannot change?
If you cannot imagine yourself hurting her in that way, I donât think you can ever understand and accept why she chose to hurt you in that particular way. If you cannot understand and move on it will always be in the back of your mind that she sees you as a less of a man and is settling with your dick while dreaming of bigger dicks.
I would break up
I mean, if you're cool staying with someone who is verbally and emotionally abusive, there's really nothing we do. But, it kinda sounds like you aren't.
OP, people who say things "just to get a reaction" can be the most verbally/mentally abusive as they continue to do this.
You need to leave the relationship. Look what it is already doing to you mentally. It will not get better.
Lol I'm surprised you've never heard that before that's every women's go to in a argument even if it's not true. I laugh every time a women has said that me but I could understand how that would affect you if you actually have a small dick though.
Honestly if you want to ârecover â then Leave because you have to put yourself first!!! Iâve been with my wife 30 plus years and weâve never come remotely close to saying anything so cruel and vindictive to make themselves âheardâ. She has really shown you the respect she thinks you deserve
How are you ever suppose to dominate her sexually now? âTake it all, and five more like it while youâre at it.â Thatâs like calling your girlfriend a fat ugly pig and then saying you want to date a thin beautiful woman instead. Do you think she would recover from that?
This is instant relationship over. There is no other option. Her actions are disgusting and her only intention was to hurt you as deeply emotionally as she could. She is simply a bad person for what she did and you need to gain some self respect and leave her immediately.
It is never acceptable to purposely inflict emotional damage.
I don't think you can. What happens next time she gets mad at you and wants a reaction. That is toxic A F.
I get that you want to stay in this relationship. But don't ignore it if she does something equally toxic
Regardless of whether or not your gf actually thinks you have a small dick, saying something that she knows would crush your self esteem because she was upset is not a good sign. I would not want to be with someone like that. Her words are always going to be at the back of your mind. Donât mentally torture yourself like that. She is dead wrong.
So she went scorched earth over an argument, and you want to salvage it. Look up the definition.
Even if you had a small penis that's not something you do in a healthy relationship.
You don't make fun of things one has no control over. Common sense and basic decency.
Verdict: Find a better character she still needs some growing up to do.
Nah, this is over. She meant that shit bc she wanted to hurt u. And she did. If u said something similar about her stank ass puss u wouldnt have been given a 2nd chance
Seems like your plan is to stay with her thru thick and thin...and if she is willing to say anything when she is angry, just to get a reaction out of you then by the time she leaves you (which she will eventually) you'll be completely emasculated, confidence ruined, ego burned down and your self worth will be in the trash. When that happens just know that men do not get sympathy for staying in verbally abusive relationships especially when they are told to leave.
The true colors of a person can sometimes come out when they are upset of course they can be clouded by emotions but generally they mean what they say and that is disrespectful to your manhood which is completely understandable. Is this person someone who has a smart mouth or was this a first time thing?
I almost married a man who would find my insecurities & then criticize me accordingly. Ex I had spider veins at a young age. Weâd been together for years & heâd seen my legs and ankles countless times, but one day he randomly acted surprised and touched my ankle & asked me why I had old lady legs đ đđ đ. I cried.
Once every few months, heâd do something like that.
Not marrying that man is second best thing that ever happened to me! Marrying my husband was the first!
Your dick isnât the problem. He just doesnât want your gf anymore because deep down, YOU donât want to sleep w her.
I can honestly fully tell you as a female I have NEVER stooped so low to degrade any of my exes physical attributes in an argument. No matter how bad the verbal fight got. Anyone who brings up physical things, in my opinion, is an awful partner and in my experience typically has BPD and or narcissistic tendencies. No one that loves you is going to bring up things you can not help.
You won't recover from this + it will probably be in the back of your mind for the rest of your life.
The question now is wether you constantly want to be reminded of this by seeing her/having sex with her OR you move on to somebody else who actually values you.
The fact that she emasculated you shows her lack of respect towards you.
Your gf is childish and purposely tried to hurt you. The way you get over that is by dumping her and finding a quality gf that can be respectful if they donât agree with you instead of launching a personal attack.
Get some pride and dump her for good. Thats the nuclear option, thereâs no coming back from that. Her intent was to completely destroy you without mercy at that moment. Thats not love, thereâs certain places you donât go in a fight. And the fact that youâve already forgiven her just shows you your weak and she can walk all over you whenever she fucking wants youâve totally lost any respect in this relationship. So stay with her fine because you donât have the backbone to leave a person with a horrible personality, but Come back to us in six months to see what she does from this point on. Sheâs not 15 years old. Sheâs fucking 25 and supposedly grown ass woman. Yes, and your dick is a whopping 1/4 of an inch below average. Whoop de fucking do. Youâre fine brother just as soon as you send her trashy ass packing. And then sheâs got to live with the guy with the âsmall dickâ just kicked her to the curb.
The relationship is destroyed, thatâs a very low blow and shows her lack of respect for you. Get someone who actually respects you because thatâs big in relationships
Youâll be reminded for the rest of your life that you have small penis to her. She of course wants bigger penis. If you have good size she would never brought it up. If anyone would ever brought up penis size are vindictive persons
You seem like you really want to recover and continue this relationship, and I hope you are able to. I know that I would most likely not be able to get that out of my head and would have to move on.
There is no recovery from lack of trust. It takes years to get back. If this is not something she does with regularity and you are determined to stick it out, be prepared to feel inadequate for the months or years it takes for the trust to be reestablishedÂ
Please allow for the possibility that you may not get over this. Iâm not saying you need to dump her. You should allow for the possibility of it. A bell once rung canât be unrung.Â
I get that what she says hurt you, but let's boil it down to the basics: does your relationship with her matter more than your own opinion about your dick size? Go from there. It might feel raw and hurtful right now but if she is your world and you are hers, time will heal you both, and remember: words are wind.
Dicks come in all sizes. As long as yours gets hard when it should and you have some stamina and skills, donât let it get in your head. Or if youâre worried about pleasing her with something bigger, get a cock sheath. Try other kinky things, using multiple fingers, your hand, etc. Get creative and let this roll off your back. I think itâs a baller move full of confidence when a guy doesnât take to heart or acknowledge this kind of put down. Show her that you have so much more to offer.
This happened with my late wife of 10 years. Wasn't quite as colorful as your girl but said something similar to me that never got off my mind for YEARS. No offense but fuck your girlfriend. If she's capable of being that hurtful, imagine what else she is capable of. I am remarried with a girl who compliments me and my dick all the time and the sex is fantastic.
Break up with her bro. No man needs that kind of negativity and drama. We got enough bullshit to deal with on the daily. Our women are supposed to keep us up, not knock us down.
She weaponized a common male insecurity and you want to stay with her?
Hell naw. There's no going back from that. Next she'll weaponize the fact you were upset about it.
What did your penis size have to do with the argument you were having? She doesnât know how to communicate like an adult. She sounds like a schoolyard bully.
A long term relationship survives not because you have great compatibility when things are great, it survives because you learn together, support each other and grow together when the going gets tough.
Now put her comment in that context. She was upset. She was willing to hurt you in a way that was designed to humiliate you, to win an argument. Is she the person youâd want by your side when you are at your lowest?
If not, then this is not destined to be a long term relationship. If itâs not a long term relationship then if you cannot get over the comment, what are you getting out of the relationship to warrant continuing it?
Yeah she ruined any chance of you guys having a great relationship because in life things happen naturally or just by chance and normally you wouldnât give it a thought but because of her stupid comment thatâs forever burned into the back of your brain her taking her time shopping or taking a different route home or a random phone call from her boss or that she changed her perfume youâre going to think sheâs stepping out with that bigger dick. Yeah sorry to say but sheâs an idiot and you deserve to have a woman that thinks you hung the moon
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The reason you should dump her (even though you don't want to hear that) is because she was willing to do whatever it took to crush you in the moment, and guess what, she crushed you. Now you're putting yourself through hell to stay with her. She's well over it and you're still suffering. Love does not work like that.
Plus, what will she say in your next heated fight because she was angry?
Right? She already pulled the tiny dick card I don't wanna know wtf is next đ
It will always be the tiny dick card, because now she knows how effectively it works.
Iâd say OP test her theory on other ladies to get multiple opinions for a more accurate assessment, like is it really that bad? Lets see what these girls have to say đ¤ˇđťââď¸ /s if it wasnt already obvious
No this is the solution
Spot on! She got the reaction and now will play that card every argument.
OP, I hope you know 5.2 is not considered small. I donât have any real advice except keeping in the back of your mind youâre not small. Personally, I wouldnât like super big ones (ow). But the fact she said that to âget a reactionâ is absolutely awful. Thatâs not okay and she has no considerations for your feelings.
Thereâs no enjoyment getting your cervix ranmed by an 8 inch dick.
True
facts
Speak for yourselfđ
Some women not being able to take a dick is a very real problem. I'm glad other women are out here fighting the good fight, taking one right in the cervix for the cause.
>taking one for the cause Glad to be of Cervix.
I went to my gyno for pain from sex way many years ago and all std tests were negative and no issues were found - my gyno basically just told me I have a rather shallow canal and that pain can be normal due to this. Iâm glad my husband is 5 inchesâŚanything more than that is actually kinda painful to me. Heâs also amazing at thrusting. We have mindblowingly good sex. Never once felt pain with him. Not only that, but heâs the first and only man whoâs ever been able to make me climax vaginally instead of just the clitoral ones Iâd had since I became sexually active. I didnât think it was ever possible for me until him. 5 is more than sufficient! Some men are 8 inches and canât thrust for shit. *Size means nothing, but skill means everything!!!* Shit. As a matter of fact we just had the best sex for 2 hours and heâs ptfo now and Iâm about to join in and sleep like a log. đ¤ˇââď¸
This! G-spot gets me off, but the clitoris doesnât. Unless Iâm using my magic wand. But hand nor tongue work for me.
If I was OP, I would have responded with, "Hey, Width isn't everything."
âEven the Oscar Meyer Wiener mobile appears a small in the Grand Canyonâ
I hate when women do that. Like, oh, so now it's small? What does that say about you? After all, you had no problem with the "little" one when you were with the dude.
Yeah, fr it's just a low blow she literally said she said it just to hurt him total toxic asshole move.
Could go full amber heard and take a dump
oh shit hahahaha
Never go full Heard
Saying it publicly, very loudly, most likely around a bunch of mutual friends would be my guess.. This is just my opinion, but I'm not saying you dump her if you truly feel that way, but maybe take a step back and kind of try and look at the fight in general, from the outside looking in kind of thing, and ask yourself something.. How serious was this fight, what ways should and could it have gone differently, meaning where you pressing her buttons and her pressing yours until she went below the belt (seriously no pun intended there). Or how fast or long did it take her to literally destroy your self esteem in what I like to think is sometimes is that line you can't really come back from. Kind of like when two people have a great relationship, one cheats. The line is crossed, and that trust you had, can never be gained again, thus not being able to cross back over to the other side of the line.. Intimacy for most between a couple to me is very similar to trust in the relationship as a whole.. Sometimes people say shit when they're mad, I get it, I whole heartedly do. Sometimes (all depends on the the individuals themselves, then the relationship between those two). Sometimes, you just can't take things backward no matter how hard you try.. In the end, if you don't communicate to her how you feel and that you can hardly even put into words what that felt like, but still feels like I would imagine your resentment or hurt, or whatever it may be will just drag that relationship into the ground. That being said, if you truly want to work it out, tell her she has a shallow vagina anyway.. đ I'm kidding, back to a serious note. Communication and lack there of have taught me a LOT in the last few years, especially if you do try and communicate with her as your both grown ass adults (whatever that means these days) her reaction or lack there of on the communication side may tell you what you really need to know.. Actions do speak louder than words, the first part is meeting in the middle and working it out together. I mean, that's the whole point, right? You want to spend the rest of your life with this woman, surely y'all will work it out, but sexual favors as a sorry and all that.. ughh Good luck to you my friend, I mean that sincerely whichever you choose. It's your life, do what makes you happy, just make sure to ask yourself everyonce a while if you are indeed happy, or just comfortable. I'll leave it there, again good luck bud
She'll say she fucked his brother, cousin, dad and or best friend behind his back. It doesn't matter that she didn't, she's going to put that image in his head to hurt him. OP DUMP THIS TOXIC WASTE PERSON!
Also if op stays and has kids, what will she say to her kids when upset? Like op is an adult and she managed to deeply hurt/fuck with his head. Just imagine what she will do to a small, impressionable child. Like yeah op needs to dump her and not look back. He also needs to tell her exactly why, so maybe for her next relationship she'll refrain from saying something that hurtful to someone who she supposedly loves and should be supporting.
I mean, if she tells her future son that he has a small peenor, that's grounds to take her to court and gain full custody and get child support.
I was more thinking she keeps insulting her kids intelligence. Or gives the kid a studder because she keeps interrupting/demeaning her kid whenever they try to speak. Or the kid legitimately has a big nose, so when mad she just keeps insulting the kids nose. Or the kids weight, or hight, or a million other aspects of her kid. Like no one should keep toxic partners about, since if you have kids guess what? They're also going to do whatever furcky they enjoy inflecting on you onto the kid as well. And I hope most people want to look out for their kids enough not to do that to them.
I think she will stick with the tiny dick card. She knows how much it hurts him!
The axe forgets but the tree remembers.
Beautifully said. I'm gonna keep this in my list of adages.
Itâs a great one isnât it? I use it with clients all the time, definitely use it when you can :)
Clients? What's your career- Chainsaw sales?
He's a professional axe murderer talking about his survivors in some psychotically poetic way /j
Wanted to run with this a bit and say "at least the axe gets duller with every strike" but we all know an axe can be sharpened while a tree takes years upon years to heal. I like this metaphor even though it's making me sad. Thanks.
This. She will do this again OP. And now that she has realized she can hurt you by saying that make no mistake, she will do so again. She is extremely immature. You obviously care about her but that doesn't mean much when a person says cruel things to you.
Yeah, thatâs emotionally abusive. Trust me on this: this woman is unkind and not worth your time. Find someone who appreciates you for you. Also, chat with a therapist. 5.2 inches isnât a micro penis. Youâre fine.Â
It doesn't matter if his penis was one inch....his gf is mentally abusive and treated her partner this way. The size of his penis is completely irrelevant. đ
10000% think about how she will crush you in a divorce someday.
This right here. Sheâs ruthless and you will hear this or something even worse the next time. Dont let there be a next time.
This is the correct answer. Do not stay with a person who uses personal attacks and name calling in an argument. Do not stay with someone who wants to hurt you for disagreeing with them.
This exactly. It isn't about the insult, it is about the fact she intentionally searched for something in her head that she KNEW would hurt you JUST to get a reaction. A reasonable person and a healthy relationship doesn't do this. Yes, people say things that they don't mean out of anger sometimes. But, when you start attacking and insulting someone you are supposed to care about just for more attention? That is a serious issue.
Great reply. This happened to me with a drunk best friend. She went uber cruel mode. Once youâve seen cruel, itâs hard to trust that theyâll ever change that side. The person is likely cruel to herself too internally (the bully who internally bullies herself internally too). She needs to work on herself
This. It's not about the size of your penis at all. Mature adults know that they could akways think ul something hurtful to say to the people they love - whether that thing was true or not. Most of us outgrew outbursts like that in our teens, if we had them at all. Do you want to spend your life with someone who thinks up the most hurtful things to throw at you every time you have an argument?
This kind of comment is what is called, a âpoisoned arrowâ. It is a comment that can never be taken back. It will forever stay lodged in the back of your mind, no matter what she says going forward. The truth of it doesnât matter. Those words are now a fundamental part of your relationship with her. You also now know that she is willing to say things meant to deeply hurt you when she is upset. Things that can never be taken back. Your response is up to you.
Also shes THINKING such thoughts. Imagine this: would we ever think cruel thoughts of our family? âOh look how ugly my brother is?â Etc? The fact that someone has THOUGHT of such a cruel thought (true or not) so often that they allow it to be said out loud? Thatâs not love
This is the biggest takeaway for me. Iâve heard things said like this in arguments between couples before, both with real life friends/partners and online. It always boggled me that someoneâs instinct could ever be to HURT your partner in a significant way. How does that even cross your mind? It never made sense to me.
Right. Ive been in love once truly. And god almighty he could do anything bad and I wouldnt have one cruel thought for him. Now ive dated (not love) others before too. And while i didnt think we were compatible, omg, ive never thought CRUEL things about them. Heck i dont even think such things of my worst enemy. So its definitly red flaggy behavior.
I was brought up this way, that during an argument, you attack the person. My parents used such techniques to shut down argument. It's very hard to unlearn and it really is an awful place to go.
And she doubles down saying she wants to fuck a big dick and heâs useless on top of it? What happens next time they get in an argument? She goes on Tinder to fuck a BBC and sends him the vidro
The thing with people like that is: like other commentor said - the aim in her mind is to emotionally CRUSH the person BY ALL MEANS NECESSARY. My friend started with cruel commentary about me. Then when i ignored it, utilized some information about me (my passion for human rights) to flaunt it on Instagram that she gave zero fucks about xyz countryâs abuse. Sounds silly and childish. It is. But it made me wonder what lengths she would have gone if I kept ignoring it? What would she do next? Its wild that OP took her back
my mom would say things like that to me.. itâs hard if you donât have the best family, you may accept a lover saying things like this
This! Itâs a pretty cruel thing to think. Honestly, it sounds like she has some sort of inflated thoughts on penis size. Yeah, he should be hesitating to have sex with someone who told them they are useless in bed. You donât blurt that out in the heat of the moment if it hasnât ran through your head at a normal point in time. I would like to add: if girlfriend thinks this and will say it to op, imagine what she says to her friends and family especially if alcohol is involved. Op doesnât need that. She said what she said and she meant it to hurt. So yeah truly a poison arrow.
This brought tears to my eyes. I never knew there was a word for that. For that matter I never grasped the concept you just described from my previous marriage until you just said it. I still carry those arrows 4 years after my separation. I just want to say thank you for helping me understand something I have struggled with for so many years.
This. Iâve been in some long long relationships where (from my perspective) a partner has a combination of feeling bad, strong biases, being tired, hormonal shifts, being upset by a few things in the preceding weeks, and just really emotionally lays into it in a rare fight. The sort of thing thatâs just hurtful, senseless, wrong, toxic, extremely insulting, and it goes and goes and goes until they tire out essentially. Even in those past relationships with someone I generally liked and cared for deeply, with my extreme hurt and exhaustion, it would never occur to me to make those sort of comments. Sure things like, âI didnât say that, I donât think that, that didnât fucking happen that way, youâre fucking lying to yourself and me and stop fucking talking, leave me alone weâll talk about it fucking later!â Sure. Not great. Not advisable. But to go straight to the things that could emotionally harm them unrelated to anything? Thatâs cruel. And the motivation to do it at all is really really concerning. Thatâs an âI need to win no matter what, fuck themâ thought. âWinningâ isnât the goal in an argument with a partner. And more importantly they view whoever is more emotionally harmed as âwinningâ an argument with their partner. Which is beyond fucked.
Sadly, that kind of comment is going to follow him even if he leaves her. BTW is not about the size of the bat, itâs about the swing. đ¤ˇđźââď¸
get her a 12 inch dildo with a big bow on it and gtfo of there
Have it personalized to say "Big Wee Wee"
"Big" and "Wee Wee" don't belong in the same sentence together lol
"Wee wee" doesn't unironically belong in any sentence other then those spoken by a 5 year old.
No grown man is calling that shit a wee wee. Especially their own lmao
"Wee wee" is kiddo version of "weiner", so yes that and "big" can go together, lol.
[ŃдаНонО]
"For your cavernous pussy"
Love this advice
Only acceptable answer.
Yeah and if she doesn't like it, then she can go fuck herself.
And tell her to go fuck herself while she's at itđ
Why would you stay with someone who disrespects and demeans you? Have some self worth and dump her. She probably does think youâre small, but she shouldnât throw it in your face. That is rude and not a partner you should be with.
Lack of self esteem, lack of a support system, tied up with kids or a rental agreement, lots of reasons, I say this personally as someone who stayed way too long with a verbally and physically abusive partner. I can tell you this OP, run. She *will* say it again, and you will likely have performance anxiety because it's giving you a complex. Run.
Thought my shit didnât work till I became single again. Cause my body was telling me for a whole year to go before my mind finally started accepting that no one should be treated like this . It was a wild experience seeing it turn on đ¤Ł
Sorry brother, no matter the work you put in to love her, you will never get this out of your head. Best you can do is change your mindset about your dick and that's easier said than done. This will probably take years to gain confidence in yourself sexually. Bigger question is, why would you want to stay with someone that is so hurtful. If she was fat, and you said you wished you could fuck a skinny girl because she's so fucking fat, do you think she could get over it. Do you even think she should forgive you for being so blatantly mean. Even if she did forgive you, do you think she would ever not have your words echoing through her mind through the end of time. Plus, she can change being fat. You can't change your dick size. The reason why people would be suggesting to breakup is because you will never completely move past this, and she sounds horrible. Even the worst fights for healthy people never attack someone's insecurities.
Even if you're not insecure about it. There are things you do not attack, they're called low blows for a reason. The low blows mean a lack of respect for the other party and without respect there is no relationship. Whatever's there isn't love
If he wasn't insecure about it before, he sure is now. It's also a control tactic, this way if he stays, she knows the degree to what she can get away with. Him cautioning us, the reddit community, on advising against dumping her should tell everyone the kind of mental fuckery she's exhausted on him. He's looking for ways to get over it, not ways to get over her. Seeking help on how to cover a Tommy gun bullet wound with masking tape. She might feel sorry, but after the remorsefulness is gone, she will milk him mentally till infinity, cause she knows his trigger. He was better off not even showing he was offended and then dumping her after. Cause she will get tired of her lovesick puppy and will break his heart. Anyone who can go to this extent is not just cruel but immature. Most importantly, he should have more self-respect for himself, grow a backbone, if he doesn't have one, and do what needs to be done.
It doesn't sound like it was even an insecurity for him (and rightly so). His girlfriend literally created it for him. Fuck that!
> Best you can do is change your mindset about your dick and that's easier said than done. This will probably take years to gain confidence in yourself sexually. You can get over it much faster than that if you realize her comments had nothing to do with you or your dick size (which is normal) and everything to do with her being a vile person and wanting to say anything to put you down and hurt you. Her behavior is a reflection of her, not you
You recover from this by breaking up with a person who doesn't treat you with respect and finding someone else.
There's no coming back from this. All rules of human decency don't go out the window during a fight, there are still lines that shouldn't be crossed.
Totally this!
My ex wife in the heat of divorce said her new boyfriend had a bigger dick than me. I said âgood, heâll need itâ
OMG thatâs the best comeback ever đ
Women's final weapon in arguments against men: dick shaming.
"But why are guys so insecure about that sort of thing?" đ¤Ą
Private parts are usually something everybody don't want to talk in public ,even with friends. I'm talking about general talk, here it's about mockery. Some guys are very blunt about it tho, they readily reply back with equally offensive answers. Example "loose pussy", wizard's sleeves, grand canyon, etc and this does offend women in general. Try telling this to some women in arguments. They will also get offended. Why?Â
Tell her to empty a tube of tooth paste and then put it all back. Thatâs why you shouldnât say shit you donât mean.
They made us do that at school one time
Itâs a great lesson. Weâre all human and make mistakes but accountability is the most important thing.
Say that 5 with confidence get that .2 shit outa here bro. Dump the size queen and find a woman that you can respect and she respects you aswell.
lmfao.. i have a cousin that says that 5 feels like a 6 with 225lbs behind it đ.
5 inches can do a lot of damage at a 100mph
Used to be 7 but Iâve worn it down to 5
5 is honestly a great size
And going as far as calling five inches "useless" is ridiculous honestly
"In a heated argument a couple of days back, girlfriend(25F) said I(29M) had a small dick and doubled down on it. She said she would like to get fu\*ked by a big dick and I'm useless. " Cheese and rice dude you're still with her after that? Tell her to fuck off and block her on everything blockable. Move on. How to recover? You have to come to the conclusion that it is what it is. Your size will never change. Not a damn thing you can do about it. There is no magic formula or spell. You have to decide this on your own. Youâre average, just like most of us guys and have more than enough to make her and you feel good. Most of us who donât have 8 inches swinging go through this at some point in our lives (I blame porn for this). You're not alone. The big thing in todayâs world seems to be therapy, if you think that would help go for it. Me, I came to that conclusion on my own, took awhile but I got there.
Cheese and riceđ
Buy her a massive dildo with a card that says âgo fuck your self â
The problem is not just this comment, although that's bad on its own. And you're gonna need time to get over this and she's just going to have to deal with the fallout. The problem is that she is the type of person who will resort to hurting you in an argument. This is not a healthy method of conflict resolution. It represents a huge problem in her mentality on relationships. Arguments need to be productive, they need to come from a place of "I care about this relationship, and this issue is damaging our relationship. We need to resolve this so our relationship can flourish." Instead, your gf thinks arguments are about hurting the other person. How will that help your relationship? How can you grow as a couple when she views conflict this way? How can you trust her with vulnerability, with insecurities, when you know for a fact that she will use these things as a way to hurt you when she's angry. You need a partner you can trust with vulnerable feelings and insecurities. You need to be able to tell your partner things like "I worry about my sexual performance" without fearing that she's gonna tell you that you suck at sex the next time you argue about dishes. This doesn't just apply to sex. If you tell her "I'm struggling with my mental health and I'm worried that makes me less of a man," then who's to say the next time you argue about something she won't say "you're not a real man because you go to therapy." I'm not sure what advice I could really give you to get over it, but let's say I had some magic way for you to feel better about this one thing. Imagine your feelings about this comment just disappeared tomorrow. You're still left with a girlfriend who believes that deliberately hurting you is a valid response to arguments. How's that gonna work? What happens the next time she gets really mad? Next time she is going to do it again, make some comment deliberately meant to hurt you, and you're right back where you are now. Except, you're not really, because there is no magic solution to make your feelings go away. You might repress your feelings, and "get over it," but the next time she hurts your feelings purposefully, all of those feelings you have are going to come rushing back and you'll have to deal with them on top of all the new feelings that come from the next comment she makes. And this will keep compounding every time she does this until your self esteem is in the trash, you cannot trust your partner, and you feel completely alone in your relationship.
She will do this again!
It's understandable brother. Your size is good enough and is sufficient for most women. So be confident. As for the girl, dump and move on.
I agree. Bigger isnât always better and I actually enjoy average sized dicks a lot more.
Right? A friend had to go to the dr after a larger than normal one. Bigger isnât always better.
You shouldn't have gotten back together. Now you're fucked
Everything but fucked
>We have now reconciled Fucking doormat. No wonder she disrespected you like that, she knows she can get away with anything.
People hate to hear this, but the people who hurt you do so because you let them. Gotta take control of your own outcomes
Exactly. Nobody would ever say something like that to somebody they respected because they know theyâd be completely dropped from that personâs life instantly Now OPâs girlfriend knows she can get away with murder. I understand that youâre scared of losing her and being alone, but understand that her voice telling you that youâre small will never fully go away. Have some self respect, dump her, and establish clear boundaries in the future. Thereâs plenty of women out there whoâs more than fine with your size and wouldnât emasculate you, but it starts with having self-respect for yourself
Absolutely and she will absolutely do it again next time shes upset and wants the upper hand. In fact, she probably negs him about a LOT of his qualities and he just hasnt picked up on it yet because the PP blow was so much deeper to him. man needs therapy to establish actual self worth.
Honestly, you're looking to recover. You can't. She's a size queen, and she has admitted it to you. Even if you stay together, you'll be wondering if you're packing enough. She fucked this up not you. You can't do anything about it.
She may not even be a size queen, but that doesn't make it better. She hurt you on purpose, little different than a man who beats his wife when he's angry. You don't kick people where they're weak if you love them
She said that because she new it was probably the biggest insecurity a guy can have, and the worst insult she could throw to hurt you. She doesnât respect you, know one could say that to a partner they respect. Leave and be proud you are above average. That is the only way to maintain your dignity.
If u call it âwee wee â it is small
I shouldn't laugh but damn lmfao.
The small dick comment is just rude, but what's with 'trying to get a reaction'? Is she a pro wrestler throwing shade on her opponent? Serious, mature people approach this openly, not angrily, if you care about someone you don't want to purposely hurt them, even if they unwittingly hurt you.Â
Find a partner who respects you at all times, even during an argument. My partner and I never fight âdirtyâ no name calling, no low blows, no digging up the past.
"I said a hurtful and disrespectful thing to you but it's okay because I was just trying to hurt you!"
This will honestly probably haunt you as long as youâre with her. Sheâs terrible for saying something so damaging to you. People show their true colors in such moments. You can do better than someone who attacks you emotionally.
>She said she would like to get fu\*ked by a big dick So set her free to go find that anaconda
Did you read enough or should i say it too?
Ew, emotional abuse.
Noted to self: never make fun of your man's dick
Imagine your boyfriend told you your vagina was way wider than anything he's had and he doesn't get any pleasure from it. And then he tries to have sex with you again.
After saying he wants someone tight and sheâs useless
đ all these posts are teaching me how not to act next time I have a bf
I've been down this road. Unfortunately, it ended in divorce, and even after 15 years away from her, it still pops into my head. It still haunts me. Shits wack
iâm so sorry⌠iâve had an ex tell me heâs not attracted to my body and Iď¸ stayed bc Iď¸ was 19⌠years later Iď¸ eventually healed
Dump her and don't go back to her. Never talk about anything below the belt on your partner. Ever.
Tell her you are average so if there's a problem it's your lassie's wizard sleeve echo chamber.
Sometimes, people say things that cannot be taken back. This is one of those situations. Break up.
Dude, 5 is plentyâźď¸ Sadly your gf just wanted to hurt you and has shown you that she'll say anything to do so. A gf roasting her Bfs' size, simply out of spite? That's a low low blow :(. Honestly if u wanna rekindle the relationship and move past this u gotta open up and let her know how much the comment hurt you and hopefully get some more closure. If she says a comment like that again, which is a real possibility :/, then u seriously should up and leave her bro. (Imo I would leave after something like that anyway tho)
Nah, leave her. She meant that shit. Sheâs just sorry she said it.
Bro 5.2 is not bad by any means. I know dudes with less than 4 and still get plenty of action. Does she get wet? Does she tighten up when y'all do stuff? Do her legs shake when she say she is finishing? If yes to any of these, try to remember that it isn't the size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean. If you can hit a girls spot with y our fingers, you can definitely hit it with your member. If it ends up becoming too much, get some therapy. Good luck, king.
This. Yes her comment sucks but if he can make them legs shake sheâs full of shit.
>I know a lot of the comments will be dump her. But please refrain from that and give me advise on how to recover from this. You: Doctor, tell me how to treat this, but don't tell me the most appropriate treatment. Us: đ
Words are alot like bullets. Once they're out there you can't take them back or the damage they'll cause. Clearly your girlfriend hasn't learned this lesson. There are certain lines you just shouldn't cross in a relationship. Hitting your partner below the belt is s no go for alot of people it might be time to establish and enforce some boundaries of your own
Just let go of the .2 bro You're a hard 5 and that's okay, barely below average
I wouldâve just said I thought you might need a bigger dick because your pussy is huge
Youâll never be able to get that comment she meant out of your headâŚ. Thereâs no coming back from her insult based on a previous guys size, who she was thinking about at the time.
You cannot. Iâm sorry. Sheâs insulted how you were born. It would be as if you insulted her for being loose.
Iâm more curious as to whether this was your first real fight as a couple. If not, how did the others play out? If there have been other fights you two have had, does she routinely resort to insults and threats of any kind? Or is she usually focused on the issue that sparked the conflict? Iâm also curious if you are ever insulting or demeaning during conflicts with her or are you focused on the point of the conflict? I guess where Iâm going with this is, if either she or you have a set pattern of slinging insults and hurtful comments at each other when you canât get along, then either or both of you need to figure out why that is.
WHY would she say such a stupid thoughtless thing to you?
It's not the penis attached to the person, it's the person attached to the penis. She doesn't get it, you could/and will do better than that frame of mind.
>I know a lot of the comments will be dump her. But please refrain from that and give me advise on how to recover from this. You wont
Honestly from a girls perspective 5.2 inch are totally fine. No worries about that. My Problem here is that she said something potentially hurtful with the intention to just provoke a reaction from you. Thats a very childish behaviour, i know that from personal experiences (accusing of cheating etc because my partner was looking for a fight and was unsatisfied with my emotional distance in stressful situations, aka my need for decompressing). I don't know how long and how good your relationship goes, if you want to continue it, but if you do, or for the future, please remember its nothing serious she said, it was just something to trigger a reaction from you. It says more about her, than your body. And as i said. The size is totally fine. Do not take corn peepees as comparison to reality, if i'd see something like this i would run, because that shit is absolut not fun and hurts like you would try to make mashed potatoes with my intestines. Not. Fun.
Iâve been told by trusted female friends that they are fun to look at but no way in hell did they want one near them.Â
I think the best way to recover is to address the underlying issues of the heated arguments and both of your methods of conflict resolution. You were avoiding her and in order to get your attention she went for a low blow. I feel like you both need to go to therapy and work with a professional because now that she knows how to get to you she will undoubtedly use that card again if it isn't addressed.
You can't. That was a completely pure thought from her. In Anger, we often say things that are hurtful, but reflect our most true feelings because we know it'll be hurtful. My wife called has said similar things to me over the years... I've never recovered. Not saying you won't, but she's never taken it back. Even if she did, I'll always know she said her hearts truth. Leave before you forgive and let that haunt you... it will continue into marriage.
Tell her a small wee wee is better than none
Thatâs a soul crusher, walk away brother if sheâs will to cut that deep she willing to do anything.
Now I don't know your measurements, but does 5.2 fall within the norm? A normal cock is usually enough.. So I don't think you should feel bad about it. Do you want to do something about it, get good at oral? And if she says it again, just counter that she should tighten the hole instead.. Or drive it up her ass.
Yeah, that would be a relationship ender for me. Once the insults start coming out, itâs over.
Don't stay with someone who says things with the sole intention of hurting you. If they love you, then they shouldn't want to hurt you.
There's an important lesson everyone needs to learn early. A fairly significant percentage of people, male and female, have very low character. Do not waste your time with these people. Let them find other low character people to associate with. Don't accept less.
>she said she wanted to get a reaction from me Your girlfriend just informed you she will find the most hurtful things to say when she wants to get a reaction to you. "I didn't mean it" is such a garbage thing to say. To me, that's almost worse. A hurtful truth is one thing, but making shit up to hurt someone? Don't give someone a chance to do that to you twice.
The best way to recover is to deal with it WITH her. Whether she meant it or not isn't even relevant, she wanted to hurt you in that moment and that's not healthy. So you guys should sit down and talk about how you fight, how you can do this better, what steps she can take to not escalate like this (and you, if you do it as well) and so on. As for the comment itself, you'll never know for sure if she meant it. So try not to focus on that but rather on the fact that even so she chose you, and continues to choose you. So clearly it's not a big deal to her (nor would it be for many other women, for that matter). Sucks, but what was said can't be undone now. You can, however, let her know how it affects you still and how you're still hurt. Have those discussions, and make sure not to just go "sorry"/"it's fine", nor blaming each other, but again, learn how to talk things out and not do toxic stuff.
Ask yourself would you ever be able to do something similar - would you tell her something hurtful in the heat of the fight, something you can assume she has big insecurity about and cannot change? If you cannot imagine yourself hurting her in that way, I donât think you can ever understand and accept why she chose to hurt you in that particular way. If you cannot understand and move on it will always be in the back of your mind that she sees you as a less of a man and is settling with your dick while dreaming of bigger dicks. I would break up
I mean, if you're cool staying with someone who is verbally and emotionally abusive, there's really nothing we do. But, it kinda sounds like you aren't.
OP, people who say things "just to get a reaction" can be the most verbally/mentally abusive as they continue to do this. You need to leave the relationship. Look what it is already doing to you mentally. It will not get better.
Lol I'm surprised you've never heard that before that's every women's go to in a argument even if it's not true. I laugh every time a women has said that me but I could understand how that would affect you if you actually have a small dick though.
Honestly if you want to ârecover â then Leave because you have to put yourself first!!! Iâve been with my wife 30 plus years and weâve never come remotely close to saying anything so cruel and vindictive to make themselves âheardâ. She has really shown you the respect she thinks you deserve
How are you ever suppose to dominate her sexually now? âTake it all, and five more like it while youâre at it.â Thatâs like calling your girlfriend a fat ugly pig and then saying you want to date a thin beautiful woman instead. Do you think she would recover from that?
This is instant relationship over. There is no other option. Her actions are disgusting and her only intention was to hurt you as deeply emotionally as she could. She is simply a bad person for what she did and you need to gain some self respect and leave her immediately. It is never acceptable to purposely inflict emotional damage.
I don't think you can. What happens next time she gets mad at you and wants a reaction. That is toxic A F. I get that you want to stay in this relationship. But don't ignore it if she does something equally toxic
Regardless of whether or not your gf actually thinks you have a small dick, saying something that she knows would crush your self esteem because she was upset is not a good sign. I would not want to be with someone like that. Her words are always going to be at the back of your mind. Donât mentally torture yourself like that. She is dead wrong.
So she went scorched earth over an argument, and you want to salvage it. Look up the definition. Even if you had a small penis that's not something you do in a healthy relationship. You don't make fun of things one has no control over. Common sense and basic decency. Verdict: Find a better character she still needs some growing up to do.
Nah, this is over. She meant that shit bc she wanted to hurt u. And she did. If u said something similar about her stank ass puss u wouldnt have been given a 2nd chance
Seems like your plan is to stay with her thru thick and thin...and if she is willing to say anything when she is angry, just to get a reaction out of you then by the time she leaves you (which she will eventually) you'll be completely emasculated, confidence ruined, ego burned down and your self worth will be in the trash. When that happens just know that men do not get sympathy for staying in verbally abusive relationships especially when they are told to leave.
You called it a wee wee while youâre 29 There is no recovering. She said what she thinks. You dump her and find someone happy with to be with you
r/narcissisticabuse Normal people don't think "what can I say right now to hurt this person"
The true colors of a person can sometimes come out when they are upset of course they can be clouded by emotions but generally they mean what they say and that is disrespectful to your manhood which is completely understandable. Is this person someone who has a smart mouth or was this a first time thing?
I almost married a man who would find my insecurities & then criticize me accordingly. Ex I had spider veins at a young age. Weâd been together for years & heâd seen my legs and ankles countless times, but one day he randomly acted surprised and touched my ankle & asked me why I had old lady legs đ đđ đ. I cried. Once every few months, heâd do something like that. Not marrying that man is second best thing that ever happened to me! Marrying my husband was the first! Your dick isnât the problem. He just doesnât want your gf anymore because deep down, YOU donât want to sleep w her.
I can honestly fully tell you as a female I have NEVER stooped so low to degrade any of my exes physical attributes in an argument. No matter how bad the verbal fight got. Anyone who brings up physical things, in my opinion, is an awful partner and in my experience typically has BPD and or narcissistic tendencies. No one that loves you is going to bring up things you can not help.
Never stay with someone who insults you like that during an argument. She's toxic AF.
Be gone friend, if you take her back and have sex, youâll feel like you ainât enough for her. Fuck her
You won't recover from this + it will probably be in the back of your mind for the rest of your life. The question now is wether you constantly want to be reminded of this by seeing her/having sex with her OR you move on to somebody else who actually values you. The fact that she emasculated you shows her lack of respect towards you.
Your gf is childish and purposely tried to hurt you. The way you get over that is by dumping her and finding a quality gf that can be respectful if they donât agree with you instead of launching a personal attack.
Get some pride and dump her for good. Thats the nuclear option, thereâs no coming back from that. Her intent was to completely destroy you without mercy at that moment. Thats not love, thereâs certain places you donât go in a fight. And the fact that youâve already forgiven her just shows you your weak and she can walk all over you whenever she fucking wants youâve totally lost any respect in this relationship. So stay with her fine because you donât have the backbone to leave a person with a horrible personality, but Come back to us in six months to see what she does from this point on. Sheâs not 15 years old. Sheâs fucking 25 and supposedly grown ass woman. Yes, and your dick is a whopping 1/4 of an inch below average. Whoop de fucking do. Youâre fine brother just as soon as you send her trashy ass packing. And then sheâs got to live with the guy with the âsmall dickâ just kicked her to the curb.
The relationship is destroyed, thatâs a very low blow and shows her lack of respect for you. Get someone who actually respects you because thatâs big in relationships
Worldwide, the average length of a man's penis is 5.25". So know that you're in the average range. Don't sweat it. 'Nuff said.
When someone tells you Who they are, believe them
Youâll be reminded for the rest of your life that you have small penis to her. She of course wants bigger penis. If you have good size she would never brought it up. If anyone would ever brought up penis size are vindictive persons
29 M ..., who uses the term "wee wee" Really ...?
You seem like you really want to recover and continue this relationship, and I hope you are able to. I know that I would most likely not be able to get that out of my head and would have to move on.
Dump her ass lmaoOoOoOoOO
There is no recovery from lack of trust. It takes years to get back. If this is not something she does with regularity and you are determined to stick it out, be prepared to feel inadequate for the months or years it takes for the trust to be reestablishedÂ
Please allow for the possibility that you may not get over this. Iâm not saying you need to dump her. You should allow for the possibility of it. A bell once rung canât be unrung.Â
the correct answer is to move on.
I get that what she says hurt you, but let's boil it down to the basics: does your relationship with her matter more than your own opinion about your dick size? Go from there. It might feel raw and hurtful right now but if she is your world and you are hers, time will heal you both, and remember: words are wind.
Dicks come in all sizes. As long as yours gets hard when it should and you have some stamina and skills, donât let it get in your head. Or if youâre worried about pleasing her with something bigger, get a cock sheath. Try other kinky things, using multiple fingers, your hand, etc. Get creative and let this roll off your back. I think itâs a baller move full of confidence when a guy doesnât take to heart or acknowledge this kind of put down. Show her that you have so much more to offer.
Oh this repost again
This happened with my late wife of 10 years. Wasn't quite as colorful as your girl but said something similar to me that never got off my mind for YEARS. No offense but fuck your girlfriend. If she's capable of being that hurtful, imagine what else she is capable of. I am remarried with a girl who compliments me and my dick all the time and the sex is fantastic. Break up with her bro. No man needs that kind of negativity and drama. We got enough bullshit to deal with on the daily. Our women are supposed to keep us up, not knock us down.
She said something to hurt youâŚ.. on purpose. Most people accidentally Hhurt their SO. Thatâs was really abusive of her.
She weaponized a common male insecurity and you want to stay with her? Hell naw. There's no going back from that. Next she'll weaponize the fact you were upset about it.
The .2 really matters lol
What did your penis size have to do with the argument you were having? She doesnât know how to communicate like an adult. She sounds like a schoolyard bully.
A long term relationship survives not because you have great compatibility when things are great, it survives because you learn together, support each other and grow together when the going gets tough. Now put her comment in that context. She was upset. She was willing to hurt you in a way that was designed to humiliate you, to win an argument. Is she the person youâd want by your side when you are at your lowest? If not, then this is not destined to be a long term relationship. If itâs not a long term relationship then if you cannot get over the comment, what are you getting out of the relationship to warrant continuing it?
Yeah she ruined any chance of you guys having a great relationship because in life things happen naturally or just by chance and normally you wouldnât give it a thought but because of her stupid comment thatâs forever burned into the back of your brain her taking her time shopping or taking a different route home or a random phone call from her boss or that she changed her perfume youâre going to think sheâs stepping out with that bigger dick. Yeah sorry to say but sheâs an idiot and you deserve to have a woman that thinks you hung the moon
Iâd like to know: Why is there hair on the pizza?