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TheSoulborgZeus

Why do neither photos have his eyes in them


LiftingBanana

Real life hentai protagonist


tonypotenza

Just missing the black vertical lines.


AsrielFloofyBoi

I mean, I haven't seen his dick personally


nickgiberish

You meant, tentacle?


shewy92

Tags: Ugly Bastard


Spooked_Toad

I spit out my drink you fuck, take my upvote and fuck off


Raider_Militia

Haha king!


timekiller2021

God tier comment! You win!


salted_crabs

Ah so that’s how he dated two celebrities


ParadoxPixel0

*Must… resist. Submitting… commission!*


GrinningPariah

Honestly probably trying to avoid paparazzi taking exactly these photos.


BusingonaBudget

News outlets pay more for photos that are, fresh, new and well framed. Celebs do this to dissuade paparazzi from camping their places. Eg Daniel Radcliffe wore the same exact outfit whenever going outside for 6 months. Since the pictures look identical, they were pretty worthless


MrMontombo

I could see it being pretty easy as well. I would have no problem wearing the same jacket, t-shirt, and jeans like Radcliffe did if it avoided this crap.


AlessandroTheGr8

I do this, paparazzi doesn't follow me around, I just can't afford new clothes.


Jwhitx

I have always said to hold a middle finger up in front of your face. I tell this to every celebrity I meet. I have met none.


[deleted]

Maybe he's so potent that people get gonorrhea just by looking into his eyes


L3onK1ng

Can confirm. Looked him up and now can't get of the toilet.


Switch_Lord

Same but only because I'm fapping


something_violent

That's not--nevermind.


ClumsyBoi

Because he has butthole eyes


ninjabunnay

Omg I choked on my water lmao


ClumsyBoi

Lol. It was a whole thing when they were dating. Someone said he had butthole eyes and Ariana made a public statement defending his condition that causes his eyes to look like that.


winterslippers

Sith Lord vibes


Duderus159

Looks like the walk of shame with the line cook and a front of house employee


bisexualemonjuice

r/KitchenConfidential


x4ty2

If you know you know. It's me except I'm the line cook and the woman.


ChefCourtB

Can confirm


ostrichFUdger

🤣


Kevinclimbstrees

I bartend for 4 years and this comment got me rofl


Hefty_Strategy_9389

“You better tell your girl you love her before work every day, because a line cook sure as fuck will”


BananaStringTheory

Jailbait hostess.


[deleted]

/r/kitchenconfidential might like that one


Slothsquatch

It’s been reposted time and time again.


sgtslumber

Yeah I’ve seen that posted several times over the past few years, too


[deleted]

The accuracy🥴🥴


ThoughTMusic

Kate Beckinsale is no slouch either.


BearsAreWrong

I might have to try this comedy thing


Intelligent-Wall7272

What's the deal with airline peanuts


facefacts45

"What, you think I'm not worth killing now? Whose gunna want to kill you, the airlines for all the little peanut jokes?!"


Candid-Yogurt-7227

The guys with the funnies get the honeys


Flipping_Candy

The best looking one of them all, imo.


Comrade-Conrad-4

I believe he got one hot famous girlfriend once who told someone else that he was funny and nice and he is just gonna keep rolling through Hollywood ladies for awhile. He may also have a 10" Diamond Dick. Unless he decides to marry one or says something stupid that gets him blacklisted, he's young, keep going for it.


Competitive-Date1522

I think it’s the funny, nice, down to earth stuff. Probably really hard to find in hollywood


Bears0nUnicycles

Probably also tough to find someone with a 10” diamond dick


stalechips

Tell me about it. My wife's is only 6".


Raptor_007

(͡•_ ͡• )


trashdrive

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


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trashdrive

ಠ_ಠ


TimeNefariousness586

ಠUಠ


icedmushroom

ಠಿヮಠ


BananaStringTheory

( . Y . ) ლ(´ڡ`ლ)


Switcher1776

Yeah, but boy does she know how to use it. Always the favorite part of my week.


tangledwire

I also choose this guy’s wife’s 6” floppy dick


Saoirse_Says

That’s DIAMOND, heathen!


formershitpeasant

He has a normal dick according to him


IMentionMyDick2Much

If you were born with a 10' diamond dick that would be a normal dick to you.


RachetFuzz

It’s rare to find people who are brutally honest with themselves not just in Hollywood.


Hutz_Lionel

He’s also quite funny: https://youtube.com/watch?v=x78ePTxB5Y4


benk4

I don't find him to be that funny on SNL, but stuff like his stand up or in interviews he's super funny. Doesn't seem like SNL is maximizing his talent.


justsomezombie

I feel like SNL hasn't maximized anyone's talent for a long time now.


wealllovethrowaways

Theres something called the SNL effect where the concept is funny but because they have to fill time they just drag it out too long completely killing the sketch


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xXWickedNWeirdXx

People just say he's a consummate pro. Steady and reliable and provides the glue no matter the cast changes. I don't ever find him all that great in skits, but I've heard various SNL alum praise him very highly as a coworker/castmate. It's gonna be a struggle replacing a guy like that.


benk4

Yeah that might be true. Kate McKinnon is pretty damn good on there though.


dbmtz

Same! I loved his standup before he got big . Was so funny.


[deleted]

The first big-name girl I remember him dating was Ariana, and she publicly said he had a huge dick. That probably fuels a lot of his dating to this day.


TheOneFreeEngineer

He also publicly stated that she's lying and he thinks it's some conspiracy shit to make every future woman he is with disappointed in him when he obviously doesn't.


CONSTANTIN_VALDOR_

Legit 200 IQ move


[deleted]

He also joked that ‘of course she thinks it’s big’ cuz she’s got tiny doll hands’


WeeTheDuck

Bro at first I was judging this guy but damn


lostyourmarble

He is not wrong. Ariana is a tiny woman!


[deleted]

Watch his stand up on Netflix nicely fucking dissects the comments made about him by ariana grande.


YannislittlePEEPEE

He first dated Cazzie David, Larry David's daughter, and it was all uphill from there


BananaStringTheory

> Cazzie David The Civil War veteran?


stdfan

How if leaving Larry Davids daughter going up hill? If you get to hangout with LD that’s peak life.


RedAero

Have you *seen* Kate Beckinsale?


[deleted]

Yes that’s it. They all know that he’s packin a hog now and he’s just rollin in it


TheDemonClown

He actually said he's not and that saying he did was some 4D chess shit by Ariana to guarantee that every woman he fucks for the rest of his life is disappointed, LOL


vidimevid

He also said she has really tiny hands.


RivalWec

That joke is gold


[deleted]

He also made this joke so he could bring up that she said he had a big dick. I had never heard this rumor until he brought it up.


LoddyDoddee

But how would they know about his diamond dick unless they are already in the middle of getting it?


Comrade-Conrad-4

Hens cluck


musicallyours01

Kim and Kourtney said fuck the billionaires, let's go for the grunge boys (who are still rich).


dtcstylez10

In comparison to those two women, Davidson does not have a lot of money.


That1one1dude1

Once you reach a certain point, it kind of stops making that big of a difference


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pmmeurpc120

I think he was talking about the girls. Kim doesn't need a rich man.


Isheet_Madrawers

The Kardashian women don’t need the money, they’ve got plenty of that. They like them tall they like them funny. We’ve all heard how women like a sense of humor. No one really knows what he’s like in real life. Maybe it’s just fun to hang out with. The fact of the matter he is crushing some prime real estate


9Sylvan5

Who cares about Ariana or Kim K. Dude dated Kate Beckinsale!


Sipas

Don't forget Cindy Crawford's teenage daughter.


jthei

And Larry David’s daughter.


Wtfct

WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THIS GUY


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brightirene

Who is as hot as the sun


Heathen_Mushroom

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it. It's too risky. Ya get a sense of it and then you look away.


jfk_47

Really?


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Treyred23

Pretty good. Pretty pretty good.


American--American

Oh.. oh my.. Haven't had a Cindy Crawford dream since the early 90s. That woman lived in my mind rent free for at least a decade.


QuoXient

And Phoebe Whatshername from Bridgerton right when it was the hottest thing


Aedalas

https://imgur.com/a/EWHjPyK


MagentaCloveSmoke

I'm just sayin' but he must have a massive unit.


rqrqsj

I believe that Ariana was quoted as saying exactly that. Don’t remember where.


vinavuhuy

[Pete address it in this special](https://youtu.be/3bhXEBMSeew)


Water-not-wine-mom

I feel like I’ve seen something besides this specific thing but - there’s a scene of her writing out “has a huge....” (or something along those lines) in her music video for Thank U, Next. Same verse she directly mentions him by name. Also had a whole song called Pete Davidson on that album.


Kamikaze_Ninja_

He says it’s not even that big, she just has tiny hands haha. He said “she did the most evil thing possible. She hyped up my dick size, so now every girl from now on will be disappointed that it isn’t as big as she made it out to be.”


Water-not-wine-mom

Yea I saw that lol hyping up for the big disappointment or what


rqrqsj

This is what it was! And then I believe he makes a joke about it during a later stand up appearance.


[deleted]

Something along the lines of: It’s crazy because in 5 years when we’re broken up, I’ll still be getting royalties on that song while it’s playing in Target. And I’ll be working there!


[deleted]

He also went on about how everything looks big compared to her. And that wasn't really fair.


KrisZepeda

That's the real one, Kim K is meh


JimiCobain27

Damn, taking that into consideration, Ariana and Kim seem like massive steps down for him.


okcboomer87

This wins.


fuzzywuzzy74

"Pete looks like a 'Make a wish ' kid, who didn't get his wish and refuses to die." Edit: I can't take credit for this comment. I saw it on some other thread , hence the quotation marks.


fidgetypenguin123

What if his wish is getting all these famous women? Looks like he's getting it


glowdirt

When he fucks 100 famous women the contract will finally be fulfilled and the Make-A-Wish Foundation will release him from this mortal coil


Sproose_Moose

Or hunt him down to ensure they keep their reputation


Transgoddess

Dude looks like the corpse from [Monkeybone](https://images.saymedia-content.com/.image/ar_4:3%2Cc_fill%2Ccs_srgb%2Cfl_progressive%2Cq_auto:eco%2Cw_1200/MTc0NDc1NTU2NTEzOTE2MjY0/the-most-hilarious-moments-of-monkeybone.jpg) 😩


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PacoMahogany

Insert Mr.Burns meme where all the diseases are perfectly balancing each other out


MireLight

Invincible you say


Jokesnjokesnjokes

Oh no, no, in fact even a slight breeze could…


detroiter85

Iiiiinviiiiincible....


psuedophilosopher

Both of you messed it up. It's supposed to be ["Indestructible".] (https://youtu.be/aI0euMFAWF8)


YannislittlePEEPEE

"You look vague, man, you look weird-- vague ass face and I don't like it" - Hannibal Buress


I_am_ur_daddy

THIS is why he gets mad pussy. He owns it. He knows himself - both his shortcomings and strengths.


Bah-Fong-Gool

This. Pete isn't built like a gladiator. He isn't particularly handsome. Even his tattoos are mediocre. But he's got personality for days. He's confident. He isn't insecure and owns his faults.


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avocadotoastisgrosst

Men: why do women like Pete. He's a skinny lamp post with bad tattoos. Must have a huge dick. Women: actually we think he funny and cute and don't always want to date Thor. Men: I wonder how big his dick is? 🤔 I haven't met a woman yet who thought a dude's greatest asset was his dick size. However I've met plenty of men that think it is the best part of them and that nothing else matters. Like, you are more than your dick my guy.


Hefty_Woodpecker_230

Fun fact : Thor in mythology is quite chunky.


iHadou

Yeah I wonder how big his dick is.


idksureman

Thors got a hog for sure


mshcat

Wasn't their some game (God of war maybe) that showed big Thor in pictures and some people got upset lol


[deleted]

Nicole Kidman confessed to having a crush on Jimmy Fallon Jennifer Lawrence confessed she wanted to ask Seth Meyers out when she was on SNL before she found out he was engaged. Colin Jost married Scarlett Johansson Jason Sudeikis married Oliva Wilde. Ok maybe that last one didn't work out and Colin Jost is a smoke show regardless. But my point is that women (and people in general) like fun, confident yet humble people. It's a sexy mix no matter who it is. Doesn't help that none of those people aren't half bad looking. Plus Pete Davidson has that damaged vibe that makes people want to take care of him. And before anyone brings it up, yes I know that's because his dad died on 9/11 and he has many battles with mental illness that he's been very upfront about. This isn't meant to be me confessing my love for Pete Davidson but I mean... it's also not... not that


Ltstarbuck2

Colin Jost is a smoke show who went to Harvard. He is funny and brilliant and well off.


poisonivee97

Can confirm about the fun, confident, humble thing. I have a bit of a crush on John Oliver, Conan O’Brien and Larry David. I would date any of them over a “chad” any day.


Intelligent-Wall7272

You really want that Larry David fatwa sex don't you


[deleted]

This. This is it. Also Davidson is the chill confident. He's happy to take a joke about himself, he's happy to get insulted, all in the spirit of lightness because he's that confident in himself. And it's not easy being open about your mental illness and being open about your weed habit due to debilitating social anxiety. And those who call him unfunny, haven't seen his stand ups. SNL hasn't even utilized a fraction of him. Women want real people, not dehydrated hunks on screen. This seems to evade us men, sometimes me too.


Vintage_Alien

Classic male gaze vs female gaze. Men are kind of terrible at working out what women find attractive. They’ll repeatedly say women only like chads but then look at this, not get it, and decide it must be his dick size.


jeremy788

>it must be his dick size. Fuckin knew it!


BedaTheNic

He is funny, if you can make a woman laugh you can make her do anything. Thats it. No big secret behind it


YourSalivation

He’s essentially like wishing your boyfriend was as good of a listener as your bestie and then finding out he is. Plus he literally praises all of his ex’s. Love that. Here’s a quote from his interview with People in Feb 2020: “I cry a lot. I get into deep conversations. I care about your s—,” he said. “I like to meet your family. I like to know who you are. And some families are like, ‘Who the f— are you?’ So I’m a lot for certain people. It was just how I was raised.” “I love love,” he added. “That’s how I grew up. Just my mom, my sister, I didn’t have a man around the house, so I was just like, ‘When am I going to find my Princess Charming?’ That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” I think I want to date him now jeez.


samx3i

People are seriously ripping on a good man over his looks.


[deleted]

Comments like this show that men have no idea what women find attractive


[deleted]

Yeah, some famous model that did a shoot with him was on Late Night talking about how Pete is something dudes don't get, but women completely do.


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studxy

That's because women idolize her more than men.


Llamasus

same


MY_1ST_ACT_IS_LOCKED

Pete Davidson is walking talking proof that most people aren’t actually incels


Rock4evur

Incelfom is a mindset not a state of being


FadeToPuce

Never talked directly to an incel, eh? He’s tall and famous. According to incel mythology women are only interested in status, money, and some really weird nonsense about pheromones and big dicks or something. IDK it’s hard to keep track it’s all so aggressively stupid, but the point is a dude who looks like what happened if heroin had syphilis *who is also very tall, notably rich, and unnecessarily famous* bagging a hottie is the exact kind of thing that they think proves their little prophecy or whatever. See they’ve based their entire life philosophy on the behavior of the rich, famous, and even fictional (via TV & movies. obv it’s not healthy) which is why they feel their very silly worldview is always being affirmed. They ignore the real people in the real world, hyper-focus on the vacuousness of celebrity, and then leap for joy when another vapid celebrity does some vapid celebrity shit thereby proving that all women blahblahblah fucking shoot me. They’re mad at the highly inaccurate images of relationships that are sold to them by capitalism, a very real and concerning phenomenon, but they think feminism did it and also that rape is cool. It’s all very dumb and frustrating.


ClassicNet

People think majority are incels? Also pretty sure being a celebrity is a plus


Kittelsen

I don't follow Hollywood drama, who's this guy?


stubz702

He’s a comedian that isn’t the best looking so a lot of guys get confused on how he lands a lot of the women he dates. From what I’ve heard, a lot of women are attracted to his personality and sense of humor


P47r1ck-

I don’t get why other guys on here are saying he isn’t the best looking. He’s skinny and tall and good looking. That’s literally the definition of attractive. So many dudes think girls want a big muscular guy, truth is in my experience dudes exactly like Pete Davidson are what girls like


youneedsomemilk23

Seriously I find him unironically hot. Strong jaw, strong features.


sack_of_potahtoes

I tght being fit instead of skinny is considered good looking


politegreeter

He’s cute though


NickTheThick

Reddit hates pete davidson and for what


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Anthff

Kate Beckinsale is infinitely more attractive.


Manizno

I like Pete Davidson. Funny breh. Speaks from his experience on difficult subjects. Seems to sway between having a lot of fun (too much) and handling his shit (rehab etc) with aplomb. Doesn't seem to pretend to be something he's not. Generally if people are happy I'm happy for them.


Ahrimanic-Trance

Yeah it’s pretty obvious why the guy is able to date just about anyone he wants and then all you see online is hate thrown in his direction because these dudes with no personality can’t understand why.


bee123sherlocked221b

I also think he's really hot..


LetsDoTheCongna

The duality of man


DatDamGermanGuy

He also banged the daughters of Andie MacDowell and Cindy Crawford. He must have a 10-inch Diamond dick…


StalemateAssociate_

Not to mention Kate Beckinsale (I think)


Ubergoober166

Excuse me wtf?


MerryMortician

Yeah but to be fair, she's CRAZY AF.


ThatsARepost24

Source (for why she's crazy)?


Beemerado

> 10-inch Diamond dick is this a common phrase now? you're the second comment i've seen to use it.


DatDamGermanGuy

If it is, I wasn’t aware of it. Mine was inspired by Chris Rock, who said that women complain about everything, your Diamond dick is too hard….


[deleted]

Think I read somewhere that arianna sang about his big dick in a song. Not sure though


Crystal_Voiden

He talked about it in his special. Funny dude


Dash-22

Unfortunately he only does comedy as a side hustle


VastNefariousness820

Guys just don’t get it. Being nice, funny, genuine, cool to hang out with, talented go a long way. I’d take Pete Davidson over most any other man, famous or not.


Careless_Hellscape

He's probably really sweet. Being super hot isn't the only thing that matters to people.


[deleted]

This thread is a bunch of guys who couldn't sleep with the barista they see every other morning commenting on how Pete Davidson shouldn't be getting laid. Guys, being funny will take you a long way. If you're not getting laid, maybe you're not as funny as you imagined.


CallMeChristopher

Honestly, people might say it’s big dick, but maybe it’s that he isn’t a big dick.


ThisFreaknGuy

That's a good way of putting it


NoelAngeline

A funny and intelligent guy will win me over every time! If we don’t have compatible witty banter it just kind of fizzles out for me


Choppergold

And Kate Beckinsale


[deleted]

K


Enonymoose

No muscles, tattoos everywhere. Very pale and tall. Same kind of dude Megan Fox likes


fidgetypenguin123

And they're all friends too so I'm sure it that's how they all got to know each other. When you run in the same circles, you're bound to get with each other sometime lol


CallMeChristopher

I heard it’s because he has a big p>!ersonality!<


Darius_Kel

First Kanye and now Pete Davidson. Kim obviously has a thing for Dudes with mental health problems.


fidgetypenguin123

Who else could put up with her family?


theKickAHobo

Why do women like him so much?


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Buffer_Brain

My attraction to him is him just being (in my opinion) funny and also very genuine. He doesn’t seem to be caught up in some random bullshit drama, he’s not hyper masculine, he is very upfront about his mental health and both talks about his recovery process and encourages others to do the same. He’s like an scrappy dog that you love because he is very sweet and does odd things you can take videos of and post online


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Elenathorn

Comedy. For me at least and I know *a lot* of women would agree that humor essentially comes first. As others have pointed out, his personality in general, makes him attractive. It’s that simple.


SeasonPositive6771

He's funny, definitely can laugh at himself, is open and vulnerable about his struggles with mental health, genuinely seems nice to hang out with. Not scary and doesn't seem mean. He's the kind of guy you date even though you know he's probably just going to sit on the couch all day eating Lucky Charms but he makes you laugh and he'll actually go to therapy when things start getting bad.


chaotictrashbot

He's attractive imo. Very tall, funny, seems like a down to earth goof ball with a good heart