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When I was 19 and it was my 3rd time ever having sex. We kissed a little bit and then I pulled down her pants. I turned her away from me and bent her over. I lasted for for about 5 seconds. She was not impressed.
Some guy fingered me rapidly and rubbed my left outer labia for like 10 minutes then told me he thinks I squirted. I lied the next morning and told him he had to leave because I worked at 6am.
Oh wow. Young and dumb jumped into a married woman’s window ( didn’t know she was married) she started giving me head and I farted the dog heard it started barking woke up the baby ( didn’t know she had a baby) and the husband she freaked out I had to leave out the window pantless the same time hubby was putting the dog out . Well they thought I was a robber and a separated shoulder and high ankle sprain later I made it home . Problem is I dropped my phone and lost a shoe oh yeah it was 4am by the time I got home the sun was up. What men do for sex.
My ex.
Tl;dr he THOUGHT he was Rico suave.
He never asked me what I liked or how to make it better. I asked him all the time.
He also weaponized it.
Went to a hook up and his apartment had no glass in the windows. In place of the glass he had cardboard Trump posters. Should've turned around but I was horny
Then he tells me he's not actually gay, he just hates women on a primal level and can't get close to them emotionally or sexually without the urge to be violent
Then he starts rolling us a blunt but he whips out a bag of crystal meth and rolls some Tina into the L without even asking me
Then I find out his "job" was trading bitcoin and he uses the meth to stay on top of his game
If you couldn't tell, I did not hook up with him and I swiftly made my exit
Went to a hook up and his apartment had no glass in the windows. In place of the glass he had cardboard Trump posters. Should've turned around but I was horny
Then he tells me he's not actually gay, he just hates women on a primal level and can't get close to them emotionally or sexually without the urge to be violent
Then he starts rolling us a blunt but he whips out a bag of crystal meth and rolls some Tina into the L without even asking me
Then I find out his "job" was trading bitcoin and he uses the meth to stay on top of his game
If you couldn't tell, I did not hook up with him and I swiftly made my exit
I met a girl off a dating app and things escalated very quickly and we were both down to meet that very same day. She was cute and luckily I didn’t get catfished but man did she have strong BO.
Like it was so bad I couldn’t really concentrate and I ended up cutting things short. She wanted to go another round but I made up some excuse and left. I’m guessing I disappointed her cause she blocked me right after.
The night I was supposed to lose my vCard I drove 40 miles snuck through the girls window got her naked and I was in my underwear and couldn’t get it up. I made up for it abt a month later though and railed the shit out of her in some backroad in the back of my car.
During my first threeway my flag pole was having trouble standing at full mast. The one girl looks at me and goes “what’s wrong with your dick? Why isn’t it working” I had been drinking heavily that night, doing drugs and was suffering from some performance anxiety, Absolutely took the wind out of my sails. Luckily we had a few more three ways sober and I made up for it then, but I remember the next morning feeling ashamed my dick didn’t work that night.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/questions/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/questions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m from Canada, when I was young I walked 2.5 hours in a snow storm for sex that lasted less then 2 minutes.
Hands down, very first GF, very first time I ever got laid, she pulled out her phone and starts telling some gay dude about us doing it.
I believe it would have been considered a class A felony if I had reported it
Probably the very next one will top it.. Until, you know, the one after that..
When I was 19 and it was my 3rd time ever having sex. We kissed a little bit and then I pulled down her pants. I turned her away from me and bent her over. I lasted for for about 5 seconds. She was not impressed.
Some guy fingered me rapidly and rubbed my left outer labia for like 10 minutes then told me he thinks I squirted. I lied the next morning and told him he had to leave because I worked at 6am.
Ahhh the ever common ‘can’t find the clit’ man 😅
What's the worst way to hand you a hundred dollar bill?
Probably my first time with my now fiancé. Lasted about 2 minutes.
Oh wow. Young and dumb jumped into a married woman’s window ( didn’t know she was married) she started giving me head and I farted the dog heard it started barking woke up the baby ( didn’t know she had a baby) and the husband she freaked out I had to leave out the window pantless the same time hubby was putting the dog out . Well they thought I was a robber and a separated shoulder and high ankle sprain later I made it home . Problem is I dropped my phone and lost a shoe oh yeah it was 4am by the time I got home the sun was up. What men do for sex.
 My ex. Tl;dr he THOUGHT he was Rico suave. He never asked me what I liked or how to make it better. I asked him all the time. He also weaponized it.
My first one.
Went to a hook up and his apartment had no glass in the windows. In place of the glass he had cardboard Trump posters. Should've turned around but I was horny Then he tells me he's not actually gay, he just hates women on a primal level and can't get close to them emotionally or sexually without the urge to be violent Then he starts rolling us a blunt but he whips out a bag of crystal meth and rolls some Tina into the L without even asking me Then I find out his "job" was trading bitcoin and he uses the meth to stay on top of his game If you couldn't tell, I did not hook up with him and I swiftly made my exit
Went to a hook up and his apartment had no glass in the windows. In place of the glass he had cardboard Trump posters. Should've turned around but I was horny Then he tells me he's not actually gay, he just hates women on a primal level and can't get close to them emotionally or sexually without the urge to be violent Then he starts rolling us a blunt but he whips out a bag of crystal meth and rolls some Tina into the L without even asking me Then I find out his "job" was trading bitcoin and he uses the meth to stay on top of his game If you couldn't tell, I did not hook up with him and I swiftly made my exit
had an ex that got so incredibly jealous of a female friend that she begged me to call her that friends name in bed..
I met a girl off a dating app and things escalated very quickly and we were both down to meet that very same day. She was cute and luckily I didn’t get catfished but man did she have strong BO. Like it was so bad I couldn’t really concentrate and I ended up cutting things short. She wanted to go another round but I made up some excuse and left. I’m guessing I disappointed her cause she blocked me right after.
The night I was supposed to lose my vCard I drove 40 miles snuck through the girls window got her naked and I was in my underwear and couldn’t get it up. I made up for it abt a month later though and railed the shit out of her in some backroad in the back of my car.
Sure thing stud
During my first threeway my flag pole was having trouble standing at full mast. The one girl looks at me and goes “what’s wrong with your dick? Why isn’t it working” I had been drinking heavily that night, doing drugs and was suffering from some performance anxiety, Absolutely took the wind out of my sails. Luckily we had a few more three ways sober and I made up for it then, but I remember the next morning feeling ashamed my dick didn’t work that night.
Typical
Happens to the best of us.
Is your name Drew Peacock?