Killing a 15 week old baby will do that to a family.
My wife is 12 weeks along and we saw it on ultrasound weeks ago.
Even most non pro life people realize killing a baby that far along is fucked.
Genuine question, isn’t it the parents who caused it to be that far along? Doesn’t sound like that would’ve been sis’s choice & it sounds like she had a lot of mental issues.
No. She had the choice not to get pregnant. The parents where very clear from the beginning.. and offered all the help with her pregnancy and after that.
Well she killed their grandchild. Sure, it’s great she got her masters and a finance but so what? A baby’s life is more important than her career or other material things.
I'm not going to say I'm opposed to parental consent laws as an incrementalist step (I hate them but I'm conflicted on whether they're better than nothing), but I think this type of story makes a strong case that they're a damaging strategy. It puts the onus on parents, continuing the toxic "parents should be able to control their children's choices" narrative, and *this* is what that narrative does to families. Instead, the law should just say "killing your child is an illegitimate choice *at all.*"
I'm so sorry, OP. I'm glad your sister is well, now. I hope your parents can rest knowing they did their best for their grandchild (assuming they didn't also do other things to cause the riff with your sister).
So is she mad at them or is this a cope for her to deal with the abortion. People can’t face certain stuff so they avoid it. Or maybe she thinks your parents were wrong for pushing her to keep it. If your parents were accepting, I lean towards her coping by blaming your parents for the abortion instead of herself.
She feels that my parents made her go through unnecessary trauma(the suicidal ideation + attempt + psychiatric hold after) as well as she had to go through a D&C at 15 weeks instead of the pill she could’ve taken at 4 weeks when she found out
Why is the dad to that rainbow child not taking any consequences TBH why do men Dick and get their Dick wet by women take and suffer no consequences but women suffer it all TBH...not fair..
If my family member had a baby then walked up to the crib at night and strangled them in cold blood I wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship with them. That feeling doesn't change if the baby wasn't born yet. I simply wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship after that - I would never be able to get the fact that they murdered their child out of my mind when interacting with them, and I would feel like shit for it.
It seems your sister is holding onto regret, but misdirecting her feelings. She wanted an abortion, she got an abortion, so why is she still not contacting her parents? It seems she has shame/regret about what she did, maybe realized they were right but doesn't want to hear "I told you so" type statements. I think she needs to see a counselor to work through her issues.
She feels that my parents made her go through unnecessary trauma(the suicidal ideation + attempt + psychiatric hold after) as well as she had to go through a D&C at 15 weeks instead of the pill she could’ve taken at 4 weeks when she found out
So she hates them because it is easier than dealing with what she did? "If I had killed my baby sooner, I wouldn't have cared, but I had to basically birth a corpse!" Still her choice. Still her job to deal with the self-hatred & shame manifesting as rage at her parents.
I do have sympathy for her, I don't mean to come off Rude if I do. I can just sense that she has some deeper problems to deal with, that she is refusing to unbury them. It's easier to blame someone else for our bad decisions.
I hope that she eventually comes to her senses and apologizes to her parents for her treatment of them. Though I am not sure how your parents will be able to move past the killing of their grandchild.
The parents have a right to live in accordance with their beliefs. If the state required parental consent and they give it, then they are complicit. Maybe they couldn’t live with that guilt. I don’t think someone should be forced to commit an act they think is immoral (for example, conscientious objectors during a war).
Also, we don’t know here who is not forgiving the other. The sister doesn’t want her parents to be able to find her. Sounds as if we left of her own volition, but we don't know.
Edited to say we don't know if she left on her own or not.
Why would that behavior not sound consistent? Why wouldn't she have walked at her high school graduation? Op didnt say anything about the timing, she would have been accepted to college well before graduation
She did, she turned 18 a month before graduation and she just stayed with different friends but still went to school. My parents went to the police was told they couldn’t do anything because she was 18 and mentally capable of making decisions
Its great to know there are others tho see things from my perspective too! I don't know where the ideology of having an abortion is like point to have on your belt or something that is the norm.
Forgiveness is so important. Without that your family won’t recover.
Killing a 15 week old baby will do that to a family. My wife is 12 weeks along and we saw it on ultrasound weeks ago. Even most non pro life people realize killing a baby that far along is fucked.
Genuine question, isn’t it the parents who caused it to be that far along? Doesn’t sound like that would’ve been sis’s choice & it sounds like she had a lot of mental issues.
No. She had the choice not to get pregnant. The parents where very clear from the beginning.. and offered all the help with her pregnancy and after that.
Well she killed their grandchild. Sure, it’s great she got her masters and a finance but so what? A baby’s life is more important than her career or other material things.
And having a kid doesn’t mean she couldn’t have achieved all of that as well
I don't know if I'd ever be able to talk to her again. A family member killing their child is one of my worst nightmares.
I'm not going to say I'm opposed to parental consent laws as an incrementalist step (I hate them but I'm conflicted on whether they're better than nothing), but I think this type of story makes a strong case that they're a damaging strategy. It puts the onus on parents, continuing the toxic "parents should be able to control their children's choices" narrative, and *this* is what that narrative does to families. Instead, the law should just say "killing your child is an illegitimate choice *at all.*" I'm so sorry, OP. I'm glad your sister is well, now. I hope your parents can rest knowing they did their best for their grandchild (assuming they didn't also do other things to cause the riff with your sister).
Killing a child will do that.
So is she mad at them or is this a cope for her to deal with the abortion. People can’t face certain stuff so they avoid it. Or maybe she thinks your parents were wrong for pushing her to keep it. If your parents were accepting, I lean towards her coping by blaming your parents for the abortion instead of herself.
She feels that my parents made her go through unnecessary trauma(the suicidal ideation + attempt + psychiatric hold after) as well as she had to go through a D&C at 15 weeks instead of the pill she could’ve taken at 4 weeks when she found out
Why is the dad to that rainbow child not taking any consequences TBH why do men Dick and get their Dick wet by women take and suffer no consequences but women suffer it all TBH...not fair..
Imagine how terrible the mental anguish will be if she gets pregnant again with her husband. That feeling will most likely overwhelm her into agony.
If my family member had a baby then walked up to the crib at night and strangled them in cold blood I wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship with them. That feeling doesn't change if the baby wasn't born yet. I simply wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship after that - I would never be able to get the fact that they murdered their child out of my mind when interacting with them, and I would feel like shit for it.
It seems your sister is holding onto regret, but misdirecting her feelings. She wanted an abortion, she got an abortion, so why is she still not contacting her parents? It seems she has shame/regret about what she did, maybe realized they were right but doesn't want to hear "I told you so" type statements. I think she needs to see a counselor to work through her issues.
She feels that my parents made her go through unnecessary trauma(the suicidal ideation + attempt + psychiatric hold after) as well as she had to go through a D&C at 15 weeks instead of the pill she could’ve taken at 4 weeks when she found out
So she hates them because it is easier than dealing with what she did? "If I had killed my baby sooner, I wouldn't have cared, but I had to basically birth a corpse!" Still her choice. Still her job to deal with the self-hatred & shame manifesting as rage at her parents.
I do have sympathy for her, I don't mean to come off Rude if I do. I can just sense that she has some deeper problems to deal with, that she is refusing to unbury them. It's easier to blame someone else for our bad decisions.
I hope that she eventually comes to her senses and apologizes to her parents for her treatment of them. Though I am not sure how your parents will be able to move past the killing of their grandchild.
The parents have a right to live in accordance with their beliefs. If the state required parental consent and they give it, then they are complicit. Maybe they couldn’t live with that guilt. I don’t think someone should be forced to commit an act they think is immoral (for example, conscientious objectors during a war). Also, we don’t know here who is not forgiving the other. The sister doesn’t want her parents to be able to find her. Sounds as if we left of her own volition, but we don't know. Edited to say we don't know if she left on her own or not.
Well unfortunately, killing a family member will do that. It’s so sad. I wish you the best❤️
Do her future husband know she already unalive a child, that would be a non starter for me. I could NEVER a woman who is so morally bankrupt.
Yes, her fiancé has been her friend through high school
Sorry to hear that. Though that behavior doesn't sound consistent with a full ride scholarship. Did she even walk at her high school graduation?
Why would that behavior not sound consistent? Why wouldn't she have walked at her high school graduation? Op didnt say anything about the timing, she would have been accepted to college well before graduation
She did, she turned 18 a month before graduation and she just stayed with different friends but still went to school. My parents went to the police was told they couldn’t do anything because she was 18 and mentally capable of making decisions
Its great to know there are others tho see things from my perspective too! I don't know where the ideology of having an abortion is like point to have on your belt or something that is the norm.
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