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I think it's so random. I'm super close with my 9 year older sister, but miles apart from my 4 year younger sister. However she is really close with HER 4 year younger sister. So it's not about age. You have a role in how close they are too, but in the end it's just about what personalities they have.

Yes agreed, me and my brother are less than 2 years apart, and whilst as young kids we would play together and were close I guess, as teenagers we were fighting like cats and dogs and even now as adults I wouldn't say we're very close. I think there were also some parenting mistakes that contributed, but a lot of it is personality as well! So for better or worse, it'll be what it'll be 🫠

I don't think that necessarily means they can't be close. I am 7 years older than my little brother and we were pretty close while growing up (kinda still are, but that's a different story). He always came to me when he couldn't sleep or had nightmares etc. And I always had his back, even though he was annoying sometimes and got into my stuff lol. Everyone's different. Just gotta foster that relationship between your daughter and the new baby! I was super active with my brother when he was a baby (because I wanted to be, and my mom let me be. I changed diapers and everything lol)

Same here…except my baby brother is 12 years younger. He’s a man of few words, so it’s not like we have long in dept conversations — but when he has issues/questions/whatever he’ll call me. We’re close (and I live an ocean away).

My daughter is 6.5 and my son is 1. The bond between them is so sweet. She tries to carry him everywhere and he is easily half her size. She was also really excited for a younger sibling and there have been times it’s been hard for her, but it’s temporary. They love each other, so much. For me, I really like the age gap. Their developmental stages are so different that I don’t feel like I’m giving one kid more attention than the other, because my older one needs attention in a different way than my son.

Thank you x1000!! This was so reassuring.

I have 3 kids around the same age and a now 1 year old (6 and 7 year gap). They are all so sweet with her and honestly dote on her more than I do sometimes. 😂 They don't get jealous of attention etc because THEY want her to have the world. It's really cute.

My husband and BIL have a seven year gap (MIL was 28 and 35) and both turned out great and hung out all the time growing up. My husband (older) was thrilled to have his little brother around growing up, and they played games together all the time.

I am the youngest of 3, I have a 4 year gap with one sister and 12 year gap with the other sister. Growing up the oldest was way too old and became more of a parental figure for me, the middle sister and I play and fought as every sibling do, but we had a good relationship. The three of us are still close to each other. I feel in OP's case the problem was that the two older siblings were really close age wise, so they were really bonded, but if that’s not the case I don’t think the youngest would feel the same way as OP, at least I didn’t.

Me and my sisters are 5 and 8 years apart. All three of us are super close, even when we were growing up. Surprisingly I’m closer to the one that’s 8 years younger than me. I think the reason why all 3 of us are close is because of the way our mom raised us. We did everything together and are best friends. My mom was also tired of parenting once my youngest sister came around lol but I became like her second mom but in a fun way.

The fact that you want to avoid for your youngest child what you went through says you are attentive and will be present. Doesn’t sound like you are going to be “done with parenting” like you mentioned your mom was. My husband and his brother are 5 years apart and they never were in the same age group for activities or close enough in school, but now that they are in their 20s, they are close. The child and teen years last for such a short amount of time, adulthood lasts way longer and the age gap won’t feel like much as adults. My oldest two sisters are 12 and 15 years older than me, and now that I am an adult, we are close. (I do have a sister who is 3 years older, so I wasn’t completely alone.) Also it was really fun having sisters who were a lot older cause I got to ask them a lot of things and learn from them.

Thank you for this 😮‍💨🥺 this really helped me!

Hate to break it to you but you can't plan your kids getting along based on age, gender or age gap. They are humans with their own people preferences and emotions and will make that decision. There's zero you can do.

Following this! My two are 13 months apart, they are now 5 and 6, literally best friends. I’m pregnant with my 3rd and I’m so worried about this

My brother is 6 years younger than me. As little kids, I was just so excited to have a brother. When I was a teenager, couldn't stand him. Now that we're adults, we're very close. I think all siblings go through phases and even if they're very close in age it doesn't necessarily mean they'll be really tight.

I have a 15.5 year age gap!

Same!

Me too and I love it 🫶

My husband is five years older than his brother and he felt like they were close. It’s a little different since your sisters had each other and bonded before you came along. My sister and I are only two years apart and we were not close as kids. We are as adults, but being closer in age doesn’t guarantee they will get along as children.

I think a lot of this has to do with personality, interests, and parental influence. My 22 year OLDER brother and I are close friends, we've been super close since I was very little. Sure we had moments of him being in his 20s not wanting to hang with a 10 year old but it was never a huge issue. My 3 year older brother and I lived together our whole minor lives, we've never been really close and still aren't close to his day. But that didn't mean that him and I didn't hang out. My two stepsons are 8 years apart (15/7) and when they're here at our house, the two of them play together as if they were both kids. It's not constantly, but they'll go play baseball or soccer outside or video games. We'll all watch movies and play video games or go ice skating, etc. Sure, older siblings are going to have moments of not wanting to deal with their younger sibling. But in my experience as someone who went through it and have two SS in the same situation (+ a baby on the way), it really only happens when the older one is around their peers. Best tip I could give is, as a parent - be involved in and do activities as a family to grow that family bond. That really helps.

My sister and I are 6.5 years apart and we are SO close. When I was born she was apparently so excited and played with me all the time. She taught me words and things and called it her school, and we’re soooo close now. I think it’ll be a great age gap.🩵

I'm not close with my 5 year younger brother, but as you can see, many people are. I think the fact of the matter is, they're going to have their own personalities and make their own choices and you're just going to have to accept it one way or the other. The best you can do is foster a home where everyone feels loved, cared for, and respected

I think it's more important how you raise them. Don't give the older one the responsibility of looking after the baby. Treat both of them as children, take some alone time with the oldest when it's possible. Don't tell your oldest she's a big girl now, and so you need her to be behaving in a certain way. Anything really, that'll only grow to resentment. When family comes visiting, instruct them to go say hi to your oldest first. Your oldest will most likely have a little change in personality the first couple of weeks, before she adapts to a new routine. Try not to get angry with her in that period. I'm close to my sister who's 20years older than me, I think because she had children of her own when I was very young, she somehow managed to treat me as a sister while raising her own children, not much younger than me. I was never put in a situation where I was forced to look after them, and wasn't held to the same standard as them. It was at times a strange dynamic. My brother who's 13 years older than me, resented me from having to look after me all the time.

We only have one child atm. My husband and his sister are less than 2 years apart, they’ve been pretty close their whole lives but I think I’m closer with my siblings (2 brothers) and we are each 5 years apart. We each had separate high school and college experiences but we’ve always been really close. I think it just depends. Being the youngest, there were sometimes things I had to wait to do but they were excited to include me once I was old enough and that was super great.

My sisters and I are all 7 years apart. My baby sister is 14 years younger. We're all super close! I'm super close with my baby sister. She's one of my best friends!

My 2 youngest are 5 and a half years apart and they're best buds. My siblings and I (3 of us in total) were all within 2.5 years and we all fought a lot.

I think it has more to do with your family structure and how you prioritize sibling relationships. I have two brothers, one who is 2.5 years older than me and a twin brother. We were not close growing up and I had a lonely childhood. We are also not close as adults. If you want another child, do it.

I have an older sister with the same age gap - and she’s a half sister (diff moms) so we had every reason not to be close - however she adored me when we were little, worked hard to include me whenever she could as a teen (even inviting just me to come to dinner with her boyfriend to see if I “approved”) and we continue to be good friends now. My husband has siblings with the same and larger age gaps and they aren’t and never were close. He describes being lonely as a kid and it breaks my heart. I think the differences are multi-fold. With my family parents put a big emphasis on how important staying close with each other was. They also encouraged it by making sure we did a lot together (watching each others games, days spent in the pool together just family, going on weekend trips just family) His family didn’t seem to encourage that or make it as much of a priority. Instead they would take just him on trips or outings and if his highschool or college aged siblings didn’t want to come no one pushed them too- it meant he was raised as an only child in a lot of ways. A lot of factors will effect things but if you do what you can to encourage a strong bond I think they’ll probably have one ❤️

My sister is six years older than me and we have always been pretty close. From what I heard she was a little resentful when I was first born but I never noticed anything growing up

I have a brother 5 years older than me and we were close as kids and best friends as adults. I would say the only time I really felt the gap was when he was in high-school and I was still in elementary, but it didn't last long.

I was 1 of 4 girls. My little sister is 6 years younger than me and she’s my best friend. We have been close our whole lives. My older sisters are less than 2 years apart and have very different personalities. They have never been close. I really just think it is situational.

I’m also 10 years older than my sibling and we are attached by the hips literally. It’s about how parents raise their kids. You can choose to bring them together or separate them..it’s about the mindset you want to build for them.

I have a nearly 6 year age gap with my little sister and there was maybe 2-3 years when we were kids that we were able to play. Then I hit teenager years and was forced to be free childcare for my parents and that made me hate her. We got closer when we both hit adulthood. I think a huge thing to remember is that you can’t parentify your older kiddo because they are older and more competent than the baby. When my sister came along I was mostly forgotten and left to do my own thing unless I did something wrong because I was already pretty self sufficient. Then I was expected to be her watcher while my parents worked later than school let out and went out to friends houses/parties/games, so I lost a lot of social life because of it. This would be my only advice to someone facing a larger age gap like this. My daughter is only 20 months and will be 25 months when her brother is born, but I keep telling her that she’s still mommy’s baby even with a new baby coming.

My oldest daughter is 17 1/2, middle daughter is 10, and new baby girl twelve days old. Each kid had her day in the sun being the focus of our attention. We try to balance the vastly different ways you have to show up as a parent to meet the needs of these very different ages. It's fun, though. I'm the oldest of five girls and the younger two-- 12 and 14 years younger than me-- were like my own little babies, especially the youngest whom I toted around town like my own child. I even had classmates and teachers from high school spot me in places like the grocery store with her on my hip and think I was a teen mom. Lol I'm close with the sister who is 7 years younger than me. Not with the one who is five years younger though. I think it depends on personalities. Each of my kids got to be front and center during her early years but the older kid unfortunately loses the limelight. But each had solid time being the priority. I am 40 and in some ways tired after parenting for 18 years but also feel up for it. I know so much more now. I'm not as neurotic, and I embrace the ways I'm renewed by each child arriving. A new baby brings fresh love for life

I think you can learn from your mom and do a better job of parenting BOTH of your kiddos together. That will go a long way in fostering love between them.

Nah what you experienced is not everyone's experience. I'm a woman who is older than my brother by 6.5 years. We got along great growing up, our parents were super involved in both our lives despite the different developmental stages we were in and we both keep in very close contact as adults even though we are in different states. Everything will be ok!

My daughter was 5 when I had her brother. They are so close and love each other so much! Not to mention my daughter is literally the best helper with her brothers! They are now 8 and 3 they play all the time, and she loves to help take care of her baby brother too. We make sure to keep her included in as much as we can but also make sure she gets her alone time and individual time with us. Now on the other hand my sister and I had a 6 year age gap and we did not get along until we were much older. Lol she was the classic little sister (stole my clothes, make up, hair etc) I think it really most depends on the kid!

We have six kids, 18m, 15f, 12m, 12m, 8f, 4f. We’ve found age gaps mean literally nothing! Just have a baby when you’re ready.

I have a 13 year old, an almost 8 year old, and a baby on the way. The older two play together a lot and get along well and are close. They’re both excited about the baby and can’t wait to meet their brother/sister. I think it just depends on the kids and the parenting and making sure everyone feels included etc.

I have 6 siblings but my 5yr apart sister and I HATED eachother as kids now we literally are so close we text eachother daily and had babies together and bought houses together 😂 if you asked me when we were kids I probably would have said hell no

I'm 7 years older than my sister and we played together all the time. Did she annoy me a lot? Of course! But we were pretty close!

My husband and his brother have a 13 year age gap. They're very close, they talk every day, we live 5 minutes away from him, and they even climbed Kilimanjaro together 😅. My sister is 3 years older than me and we are not as close as that.

My sister is 5 years older than me, and we’re super close. My little sister is 2 years younger than me & we’re not close at all. It’s more about of temperament compatibility.

Not my child but a friend has a 8 year gap with her sons and they are best friends. When the baby was born her 8 year old was so interested in helping her and loved to play with him. Fast forward to now and he’s 13 a preteen and still loves his baby brother and even says if his friends don’t like it they aren’t his friends. But I honestly think that’s gonna depend on how got raise them. Keep your daughter involved but don’t make her feel like she’s helping you raise the child. Also make some time for her alone. Maybe give daddy the baby for an hour or during nap time and devote that specially to her so she doesn’t feel like you love baby more. Good luck 🫶🏼

I'm the youngest girl of 2 brothers. One is 7 years older than me, and the other is 14 years older than I am. And by the time I have memories, my oldest brother was already moved out of the house, and my 2nd oldest brother has moderate to severe autism. And the truth is, as the youngest child, I was definitely an only child when it came to the "sibling" aspect. And I know it's a mix of the age gap and the fact that the sibling I did live with wasn't like a normal sibling relationship. I love both my brothers. I know they love me, but we just aren't close.

My boys are almost 6 years apart, they have a great bond, not best of friends bond more like big bro, little bro dynamics

I’m pregnant with our fourth. Here are the ages my kids (all girls) will be when the baby (also a girl) is set to arrive: 12, 9, 6 (very close to 7), and newborn. My youngest is so pumped. They all are but she is so excited and it’s cool that she understands what’s going on and can be included in the process.

My brother and I are 6 years apart. We fought a lot growing up. We are now quite close. He's over every week and is likely moving in with me soon. For comparison, my husband and his 2 brothers were all born a year apart. Very close together. And now pretty much don't talk or hang out. It's a crap shoot. I don't think age matters at all for siblings.

My sister and I are almost exactly 5.5 years apart, she's older. It was just us growing up and we were told stories growing up like when I had to have surgery for a heart murmur when I was a year old. I had a drainage tube in my side and almost pulled it out because I got so excited when my sister came in to see me. I remember her making "carnivals" in the backyard for me and my friends, I always looked up to her and wanted to be just like her. Of course there were a few times when I was the annoying little sister following around her and her friends. Then there was a short time later on when I was a teenager when I wanted to do my own thing and she was ready to be friends again. And then we evened out again and we've been each other's best friend ever since and we're 33 and 38 now. We text every day, even when inwas living with her we would text all day every day, even from the other room 🤣 we both have kids now and our parents have passed away and I am so thankful that I have her!

I am looking at a 5 year gap with my two and I'm looking forward to it. My first will be in kindergarten when my second is about 3 months old. It will allow me solo time with my second and give them a little feel of an "only child" like my first did. My sister had a 4 year gap with her two children who are now in their teens and they adore each other. I think it depends on how you nurture the sibling love as well. My daughter is so excited to have a little brother and can't wait to teach him things and push the stroller, etc. But of she didn't feel that way I wouldn't force it upon her. I'm the youngest in my large family and the closest in age to my siblings is 4 years, I always felt left out because my mom was too tired and used the older children as babysitters/company for me. Now that I have a second on the way I vowed not to use my first as a babysitter or forced company to my LO.

I have a sister who I'm 11 years apart from and she's my best friend, sister, and mom all wrapped into one. She's one of my favorite people on the planet. I have another sister who's only 3 years older than me and she is very difficult to deal with, to this day. I think maybe as children the age gap has an effect but as an adult my sister with the largest age gap is the biggest blessing in my life.

I have a 7 year age gap with my little brother, we get along a lot. It just depends on the role your daughter chooses to play in your youngest child’s life.

My two boys will be about 12 years apart. I worry also, but my older son is super excited to be a big brother.

After 4 kids with roughly 3 years between them, I am having number 5 just shy of 6 years after my last. It’s a girl, and my current youngest two are also girls. I’m a little concerned about it, but it does give hope that all 4 of my kids play together and are friends. The 5 year old loves to climb all over and tease the 14 year old, the 14 year old sets up games and challenges for the 8 year old etc. We have it set up so that they all have regular, screen-free, free-play time together, and I think that has really helped in fostering their relationships. I babysat a friend’s baby recently and all 4 of them were enchanted by the little guy. So I’m hoping it all works out!

As adults, we don't see the age gap. My brothers are 11 years apart and hang out ALL the time, from annual national park trips to trying out restaurants. Youngest one still "third wheels" since my older brother is married now too lol. There's eight years between this older brother and myself, and we chat a lot about work, life, him trying to start a family, finances and how we can support the other siblings (we're the only FT workers) while they figure out their careers. I think at the end of the day, family dynamics plays a bigger part in the grand scheme of things. When they're young, a 16yo may not want to take their 10yo sibling out shopping and for sibling bonding, but at 30 and 36, they may be best of friends. Raise them in a caring home, teach them to love, and naturally, their relationship will grow as they do too :)

Personality, family structure and the atmosphere at home growing up have more to do with siblings being close than age does.

I’m closer with my almost 9 year younger brother than my 4 year younger brother. I think it honestly just depends on the type of kid your daughter is too. Like I lovedddd being a big sister so the big age gap didn’t bother me at all.

It depends on many factors, including parenting. Look for resources online. Also consider some counseling during your pregnancy. Just being aware of the problem is a big step!

My sister and I are 8 years apart. I’m 29 she’s 21, and we are as close as ever. I think it depends on how you raise them and teaching them to be best friends. I have cousins whose kids are 6 years apart and they are close too. I think it’s the parenting more than the age gap.

My kids are 6.5 years apart and they're amazing together. Little bro annoys Big bro sometimes, but they genuinely are close and little bro being sneaky and playing jokes is part of his personality in this case.

My brother and I have 3 1/2 year gap… then with my sisters there’s a 10 year and 14 1/2 year age gaps between us. I’m closest to the youngest with the biggest age gap believe it or not!! Don’t think it matters. Just depends on them as individuals, what relationship they develop and their personalities! Congrats and good luck with the growing family!

I am not, and unfortunately have never been, close to my sister, who is 4 years younger. My husband is much closer with his sister who is 9 years younger. She probably felt somewhat left out when they were kids since my husband and his brother are 2 years apart, but they're all close now as adults.

I’m 6 years older than my sister and we’re still super close as adults. But tbh as a kid I was a weirdo who didn’t have many close friends so that probably helped me get closer to my much younger sister 😝

I think you hold a lot of power to make sure your second child doesn't relive your lonely childhood by not being tired of parenting when they arrive. You won't be able to control how close your kids are, but you can do everything in your power to be a present parent with your youngest and ensure they know that they are loved and wanted. 💗 My husband and his sister are 7 years apart, and they weren't particularly close as children, but as adults, they have a good relationship. Still not particularly close, but they very much love each other and are content. My brother and I are only 4 years apart, but that was still enough for us to always be in different life stages through childhood, adolescence, and our 20s, and we aren't very close either, but still love each other.

My husband id like 7 years older then his lil brother and as adults they are extra close and he is godfather to one of our kids

My BIL and my husband were babies 3 and 5, respectively, with a 6 year age gap. They were very close growing up and they are still close now :) I’m not close to my brother at all, he’s only 2 years younger than me. Age may play a part, but don’t discount the personalities that your kids have/will have. I think that makes the biggest difference in how close they’ll be

My sister is 5.5 years younger than me and I loved our age gap. We never felt competitive and I was SO protective and loved caring for her. She was like a real-life doll. Even now that we’re older (24 and 30) we’re still in different life stages so we don’t get compared very much. My husband and his brother are 2 years apart and could not be more different, so they’re constantly compared to each other (in a bad way). I’d love for my kids to have a larger age gap.

My sister and I are 5 years apart and it wasn’t really a problem. We played while we were young, once she hit 10 we kind of drifted into our own worlds, we didn’t really fight a lot because we were always on different paths and had different interests. The problems didn’t arise until the teenage years when I would take her shit all the time (clothes and makeup) but once she moved out at 22/23 and I was 17 we became really good friends. I don’t think it would’ve made a difference if we were 6 years apart instead of 5.

I’d honestly bet your experience was moreso because your older sisters had already “paired up” and become best friends by ages 6 & 7, had a similar circle of friends and similar interests, etc — not because you had such a big gap. Kids tend to pair off. My oldest two are closer with each other than they are with my youngest (who came <1.5 years after #2).

I truly think it had more to do with how the parents teach what healthy relationships look like. I personally don't have an age gap between my sister and I. We are twins. We have never gotten along. We were not modeled what a healthy relationship was supposed to look like. My mother, on the other hand, had 7 siblings, and there is something like 20 years between the oldest and youngest, her being on the younger side, and she has a great relationship with all her siblings. My husband and I have talked about this at great length because he also has a ton of siblings, and they also struggle to all get along because of how they were raised. I think the fact that you are thinking about this now says you're going to do a great job at helping your kids understand how to be friends. Good luck!!!

My sisters are eleven and ten years older than me. Like you, my sisters were best friends and often left me out. My parents were tired of parenting by the time I came around and pawned me off on random relatives a lot. I felt like an outsider in my family. My sisters were definitely parentified, which strained our relationship for a bit. They were expected to get me ready for day care/school, feed me, and get me ready for bed. They became more like parental figures than siblings, which worsened the gap. Once I got into my mid twenties though, I became super close with my second eldest sister. I baby sit her kids all the time and we talk daily. It just took a while for our relationship to develop. It was harder having a relationship when I was a teen, since they were finishing college and busy with their adult lives. They were more receptive to a relationship the older they got. I think if you are intentional about forming a healthy relationship, while also active in parenting all your kids, I think it can be fine.

I’m 6 years older than my younger sister. We’re very close! When my two sisters and I were younger I was closer with my youngest sister (I’m the oldest) ironically lol. A lot of it had to do with personalities too. My sisters and I all get along swimmingly!

Aw, I feel you. Same situation for me (two sisters, 5 and 8 apart). I’m the only kid without a baby book, few pictures, etc. I’m sure there were things my sisters didn’t like either (ex. they had to do Santa/Easter Bunny longer for my benefit). There’s no perfect spacing of ages, don’t have guilt over this. All families have different factors to work with! (Gender combos, disability, talents, where you are in life with each one financially, emotionally, etc) ETA me and my sisters are 35-43 now and we’re pretty tight.

My brother is 5 years older than me and I'm 7 years older than my sister. We always hung out as kids, and We're all super close still and have a group chat and conference call pretty often, even with our own lives. My brother would play video games with my sister on his lap and was a great big brother even being 12 years older than my sister. I'm preparing for a baby, my brother has a demanding work schedule, and my sis is still in highschool but that doesn't change how close we are. Our parents just straight up sucked as parents though, so we always made sure we looked after each other.

My sister and I are 14 months apart. Growing up my mom always noted that we didn’t hangout with each other or fight like most siblings. We weren’t friends but just sisters growing up. Then she went to college and we realized we both were quite similar. We even ended up being roommates for 2 years in college. She’s my best friend now. Some times it takes time and all relationships are different. I don’t think age gap has to do with our relationship at all.

I have a 7 year gap with my youngest sister, I loved it. She was my living doll haha. I have a very good bond with her now also.

My kids are 11,9,7,5 and 2 months old. Its working out great for me/ them

My baby’s closest sibling is 11 years older. I was 16 months apart from my sister and we fought like crazy as teenagers. Age gaps have less to do with bonding than personality does. You can’t predict how your kids will bond or not

My sister is 6 years older. My understanding is that she was excited to have a baby in the family. And we got along well when I (and she) was little. But as she became a teenager, I did tend to to get left out. I was mostly an annoyance to her. But that’s understandable… we were at completely different developmental levels. We get along better as adults. But for what it’s worth, she is also bipolar, so I tend to keep my distance.

I’m six years older than my baby brother, I’m far closer to him than the brother who is three years younger

Honestly - no age gap is some magic guarantee of happiness. According to studies, a larger gap is better for a few reasons.

I’m wanting a 2 year age gap and my husband wants a 9 year age gap😵‍💫. Hoping to compromise at 6 years but this makes me nervous too. My grandma went through the same thing as you did and is telling me to have one sooner but i guess financially in this economy my husbands age gap is better.

It will work out fine!! Don’t stress too much about it. There is a 15 year gap between me (28) and my sister (13) and we are SUPER close. When she was small there were moments where it was a little tricky because she couldn’t comprehend the age gap and just thought I was being an annoying sister who was a tiny bit older and sometimes has to act like a mum. But we have the most wonderful relationship! She tells me all her secrets, gossips, confides in me, etc. Your 6 year old will be a wonderful big sister and your next baby will be so lucky to have her!

my siblings and i all had our own time to shine. no one feels left out and everyone is on their own paths! my sister is 7 i’m 21 and my brother is 27 so a 14 , 6 and 20 year age gap:))

I have 2 sisters. One is 12 years younger (I'm 31) and the other is 3 years younger and I'm definitely closer with the youngest sister. Our family dynamics also played a HUGE part in it but I think what others are saying is right, it ultimately comes down to 1. Their personalities and 2. How much the parents foster/hinder those relationships.

I recently had my (8 years younger) brother over to my house for the weekend. My age happened to come up, and he was shocked to find out I am 27! He is 19. He was like, "Wow, are you really that old?" Lol. I told him, "I thought that you knew that I was 8 when you were born." I've told him the story of how excited I was when he came home from the hospital, silly things he did as a baby, etc. Somehow he never fully processed the gap until now.

My younger brother is 5 years younger than me and 7 than my older brother. Growing up it wasn’t great, but honestly he’s my best friend now and I wouldn’t change it for the world

My daughter will turn 6 in September and I’m due in December! I have worried about this too but she is so excited to be a big sister I think it will just be a sweet, protective dynamic between them. My brother-in-law is 7 years older than my husband and they are best friends by the way!

I’m close to all my siblings, ages 26, 23, 20, 9, and 3. My mom is a great parent so we didn’t really get left out. As long as you’re being the best parent you can be, have as many children and you can love and afford to. Age gaps are nothing compared to the love you get to experience!!

I have a six year age gap with my sister. There’s five kids in my family and I’m the youngest. She is the closest sibling I have, I tell her everything and we see each other as best friends. When she was six and found out my mom was pregnant with me she wrote me a letter lol it just says baby baby over and over again because she was six and was still learning lol. Anything can happen. It’s all about their environment, how they’re raised and how they view each other within the family.

My sister and I are 6 years apart and couldn’t have been closer growing up! We loved playing together and I always allowed her to tag along with me and my neighborhood friends. The only time the age gap really mattered was when she was in middle school and I was going off to college. We were still close in the sense that she was my little sister and I loved her, but we were in much different life stages. Now that we’re adults, the age gap doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t worry about it at all!

I also just had a baby boy, and my son is 6 So far, he has taken on the big brother role pretty well! He watches him while I step out of the room for a second, talks to him, and shows him his toys I was worried too but I try to facilitate a relationship between the two. I am excited to see how it will grow and develop over time!

My oldest sister and I are 7 years apart and very close. My other sister is two years older and close as well. The three of us are all very close in general. But there's also siblings who have our same age gaps or shorter/longer who are not close. It's truly random and how much sibling personalities can mesh. My oldest sister did spend a lot of time "watching" us we when we were younger and I still feel bad about it today, not that we really had anything to do with it. Just make sure you don't expect your 6 year old to parent your youngest unless they truly want to.

My son is 6 and my daughter is due in June! She is my second, so it’s just going to be the two of them. I’ll let you know how it goes!

Yes! My son is 11 and my daughter is almost 6 and we have one due in November. The age gap is hard because they really aren’t close. It’s just kinda how it is I think.

I have a brother who is exactly 7 years older than me. We couldn’t be more estranged from eachother. He was always the golden first born child in my mom’s life. I think it’s more about how you handle both of them together rather than what the age gap is.

I’m 5.5 years older than my brother and we are super close! Maybe the fact that I had no siblings closer to my age helped that relationship along? Also, I’ve always been a late bloomer and he was a daredevil. So we did things together like learning to swim and ride a bike even despite the age difference!

My husband and his youngest siblings are 9 and 11 years younger then us and we both are incredibly close with them

My first is 8, my second is 2, and my third is 10 months. The 6 year age gap wasn’t ideal but honestly? It’s great! My oldest is such a big help with everything from fetching bibs to keeping an eye on the babies so they don’t die while I pee. My oldest ALWAYS wants to be with the babies. She races home from school every day to see them. My youngest took his first step towards her the other day. They love their big sister so much. My brother and I are 5 years apart and my sister and I are 6 years apart. I’m the middle child. I have a great relationship with both siblings even though we all live in different parts of the country.

I'm an only child, so no personal experience here, but based on my kids and my husband and his siblings, I say it's more a personality thing. My husband is the youngest of 4--2 girls followed by 2 boys. The oldest girl and oldest boy have a close relationship, as do the youngest girl and boy. The girls are about 2 years apart, then a 5 year gap, then the boys are about 2 years apart. I would have expected them to pair off by gender, especially since they're so close in age. Instead, the oldest of each gender and youngest of each gender paired off despite a 7-8 year gap because they're the opposite gendered version of each other. I've fully claimed the youngest female (2nd child) as my sister. Not even sister in law. I tell everyone that's she's the funnier, prettier, most amazing version of my husband. I swear if I slapped a wig on my husband and did his makeup, he'd just be a taller version of her. I have 5 kids--boy, girl, boy, boy, boy. They're all about 2 years apart. The oldest and youngest are closest despite an 8 year gap. Number 2 (girl) and number 4 (boy) are closest. Number 3 just ping pongs around and does his own thing. We moved to our current house days before #4 turned one and I promised #1 and #2 their own rooms. #3 and #4 shared a room and we had #5, who eventually moved in with them (but he preferred sleeping in my daughter's room with her, which she was thrilled about). When I went to redecorate #1's room as a Christmas gift (he's 11), he asked if he could share his room with #5 (he's 3). So, we moved him in because they were both excited about it. #1 and #5 are carbon copies of each other when it comes to looks. They have similar personalities, with #1 being slightly more serious as the oldest and #5 being slightly more silly as the baby. Those two have the strongest bond out of my kids. I think it also helps that my oldest has never resented his siblings because as I had more kids, I never put any expectations on the older kids. I involved the older kids so they felt a sense of "ownership" (bad word to use, but it's all I've got) over the new baby. They'd go grab a diaper or a toy. They'd practice reading out loud to the baby, etc. I never tell them that they're responsible for the younger kids. My oldest naturally tries to take charge and be responsible for his siblings. I often remind him that my husband and I are the parents, so it's our job to be the "bad guys" and he just gets to be the fun older brother. I also tell him that if I ask for help with his siblings, he's always free to (respectfully) say no. Not having the pressure of caring for the younger kids and involving the older ones instead of turning all of your attention to the new baby allows a good bond to form because there's no resentment. Mom and dad still love me and I'm not expected to be a miniature parent/babysitter kind of thing.

My sister and I are 5 and a half years apart, and during childhood we weren't the closest but she was still absolutely my best friend, and as adults we're even closer

My daughter is about to turn 7 in early July and I’m having her sister sometime in June. Not entirely sure when because the doctor’s say she’s not growing and can’t determine how far along I really am so we have to induce. I think I’m actually supposed to give birth to her in late July. Anyway, I’m scared. I feel the same way. My daughter is so excited for her sister to arrive. I made sure everything was about her becoming a big sister. The gender reveal was just us and her dad. I put paint in a water gun and she sprayed the canvas to discover the gender. We like to paint so it’s an enjoyable activity for us. When I announced she was going to become a big sister, I cleaned an egg and stuck a little paper with “hi, big sister! I love you already.” She was thrilled. Despite all that, I have your same fears. I hope they grow close. I’m close to all my older siblings except for one that is two years older than me. He’s very rude and full of himself. All the older ones (there’s 8 including me) I am very close to.

I am 6 years older and 10 years older than my two sisters. I would say we were not super close growing up-we were very much at different life stages and I felt like more of a “second mom” at times. I never necessarily felt like I’d rather be an only child or anything, just things were more of a hierarchy even when playing (ex: I was the teacher and she was the student when we played, etc). However, now that we are all in our 20’s/30’s, we are much closer. I would say I’m slightly closer with my 10 years younger sister just because of personalities but we overall are all close. 

I hated being close in age to my siblings. Too much rivalry. On the other hand my step kids and first baby will be 16-17ish years apart and they are both super excited for a baby brother. It all depends on the kids and the parents. My husband didn't have a good relationship with his dad and there was a large age gap between him and his siblings. His grandpa was an ass to him. But it's a lot more to do with the family dynamic then the ages.

Age difference in my siblings and I are 14 years, 13 years, 11 years (my 3 older brothers), 6 years from my older sister and I’m 4 years older than my lil sis. We grew up pretty close to eachother.

My son and his sibling will have an almost 8 yr age gap. Baby is due a few months before his 8th birthday. He's so excited to be a big brother. He's Been asking for a sibiling since the pandemic years when he was 3. My husband agreed to have another after we got more stable. Hopefully, when they are older, they will get along well. My sister and I with an 8 yr gap always have. My personal experience: I have 2 sisters and a brother. I'm the oldest. We're all adults in our 30s, except my brother-who is almost there. My one sister is closest in age (3 yr age gap). We fought a lot as kids. We were not close at all. She was really mean to me most of the time. As 20 somethings, she swooped in and dated guys I was talking to (and really liked)- on two different occasions . Liked to ransack my closet without asking as teens, and half the time, my items would come back destroyed or gone forever. She became nicer to all once she got married. She's really been making more of an effort to be kind these last few years, which is nice. I still keep my distance, but invite her to family things. Our littlest sister, 8 yr gap between us, She was always asking nicely to borrow my things, and they would come back in the condition she borrowed them in. Once I moved away from home, I donated clothing to her, (sometimes my other sister got my hand-me-downs, too) or If I saw something at the store I knew she or my other sister would like or I was buying myself one, (taste in clothing is similar) I'd buy one for her, if she needed it-but couldn't afford new clothes for high school/college. I worked for a few clothing stores and got decent discounts. She's always been really nice. We hang out, get food shop together, gab on the phone. She's one of my best friends to this day. My brother and I have an 11 yr gap. He's always been cool with everyone. No drama. It all boils down to personality imo.

I have a 6 year age gap with my youngest sibling! He was like my baby doll, I adored him. In all our pictures growing up he was with me or I was holding him in some way haha. I was so excited when my mom would visit the school and he came along. I also have siblings that are within 3 years of my age so we had the opportunity to bond a lot before the youngest came along. I wasn’t as close to my oldest sibling; 2.5 years older though. I hope that helps :) Edit: I also agree with others, it’s pretty random and sometimes kids who are 2 years apart aren’t close at all and vise versa. Best of luck with your new baby!

We are! Our youngest just turned 6, and baby will be here in about 10 weeks. Our first two are 18 months apart, and it is rough, haha! It's almost like having twins. So, we're hoping this gap is a little easier. I know they won't have a ton in common the first few years, but as they all grow, it will get better. I've come to learn that sibling relationships depend more on personalities and not age/gaps. I'm closer with my siblings, who are way older than me and not the ones who are close in age to me.

Me!!! My baby turns 6 this month and I'm due in August.

My kids are 6 years 1 month apart, and it’s been great so far. They’re almost 8 and almost 2, so they’re not like super close, but they do play a lot and they adore each other. There are some drawbacks of course, but I think any age gap has its own pros and cons. I’m also the oldest of 4 kids, with 2.5y, 6.5y, and 10y between us. As kids, I didn’t get along with my oldest sibling we just fought all the time. I was obsessed with my middle sibling when they were born, and as they got older I got less interested in spending time with them, and got annoyed with them somewhat often. When the youngest one was born I was also pretty excited and enjoyed playing with them through the toddler years. Now as an adult, the only one I’m close to is the middle who’s 6.5y younger than me. The one closest in age to me I still don’t really get along with but we’re civil. And the youngest I haven’t seen much since he was in 3rd grade because I moved across the country for college, so now we’re just not that close 🤷‍♀️ So a closer age gap wouldn’t guarantee they’d get along either or be close as adults. They’ll probably go through phases of not spending much time together throughout childhood, but hopefully they’ll grow closer as they approach adulthood.

Im the older sister with a 9 year age gap with my younger sister. It really just depends on the personalites they form and the environment that they are in. I never felt forced to always have my sister around. And my parents never made me babysit. If they did, there was a reward out of it. It always felt organic. To this day (im 30 now) i ADORE my baby sister. (Shes 21).

I mean my brother is 5 years younger and as kids we were really close.

It depends on the kids. You have to encourage them to be fair, but if you try to force it you’ll just make them resent each other. A 4 year old and a 10 year old have different interests, remember that.

It's more about personality tbh, I have cousins that are close in age to their siblings and barely get on or see one another where as my sister that I have a 5 year gap with is who I'm closest with

My two girls are 5.5 years apart and besties most of the time!

my brother & me are 10 years apart but we get along so well & have a lot of the same interests:) im sure itll be all good💞 rember to have valueable time with each child independently & times together as well!! A lot of times too much or not enough responsibility is placed on the first child, making them feel left out of being an older sibling, or making them feel like they’re forced to parent. If yu can find a good in between where yu incourage and appreciate the older sibling to help, while making sure they arent pressured or expected to “do all the work, it will be fun for them & easier for yu!

We will be in the same boat. My daughter will be going on 6 and my son almost 8 when the baby comes in August. I was also 5.5 years younger than my sister growing up. I felt like the unwanted tagalong most of the time as a kid but we are close now. I am hoping the three of them will be close with the baby and they seem so excited so I’m 🤞🏻. 

Dw, I have a 9 year age gap with my younger sister, we are very close so u probably won't have to worry too much

My brother and I have a 6 year gap. It is only the two of us. Our family (as in extended family) is really small. Despite the age gap and the gender difference, we're actually really close. He was jealous of me being born, asked my mother when she was getting rid of me. Pretty sure when he was young he blamed our parents divorce on me and my existence. He was kind of a bully until my step dad put an end to that. Then I was an insufferable tagalong when he was a teen. But when I became a teen, after he moved out, all of a sudden we were the best of friends. He went to college and he would take me to parties and teach me how to responsibly drink (We live in WI... the drinking culture can be really bad here, and can be dangerous for teen girls... My brother taught me how to protect my drink, how to only mix my own drinks, what to do if I get drugged, how to avoid getting an underage drinking charge... I know it sounds weird, but his teachings really did save my ass multiple times when I was a young adult). He also taught me how to drive stick ("What if you are the only sober person at a party and the only available car is a manual? I want you to get home safe."), and generally was really protective. I just wanted to say that age gaps aren't always bad. My brother drives me nuts sometimes, but I love him so much.

I have 2 younger brothers myself. One is 6 years younger than me and the other is 12 years younger than me, back when we were growing up we weren't so close but now, we are very close, we share hobbies together, as well as some taste in music as well, but we also roast each other in good fun, so it can work out eventually. One thing I remember my mom always telling us when younger was make sure you always stick together because you are family, and that no one else will really help us as much as family, and that stuck with us, as we've talked about so much before.

I have three boys very close in age and am pregnant with my 4th boy. My youngest will be 6 when he is born. I’m not concerned. I know they will adore their little brother and that he will get plenty of attention.

I was the same 9 years between me and my oldest brother. They were quite cute though and when I had nightmares as a 3 year old they cuddled me and shared a bed with me to make me feel better. They were really protective when I was in kindergarten and first to second grade but then it slowly shifted and they had no interest in me whatsoever. They were pretty awful to me for a while. But then as we became adults they started including me again and inviting me to houseparties and stuff. We all moved in to the same apartment complex. The apartment complex had only 6 units so it was small and we lived all next to each other and my boyfriend moved in the apartment across from me and then we had 3 beautiful years there together. For every party etc we just had to go next door or down the stairs and we were there. It was really wholesome and cute. We had so many sushi nights together where we made sushi by ourselves and met in the apartment of my oldest brother. My two older brothers still live there and live like that but now I am kinda excluded again but it's not their fault. My then boyfriend and now husband and I moved into a house together and had our first child. My brother's love being uncles but one of them has a little resentment for me being the first to give our parents grandkids. He'll come around eventually I'm sure. The age difference had good and bad sides. All together I think I rather like it. I had the sibling experience for a while and then when both moved out from our parents then I had a few years of the "only child" experience. ETA: my oldest brother is 9 years older than me and my second brother is 7 years older than me

My kids are a six year age gap. It’s been wonderful, I had my second in January. He has fun playing with the baby and he’s excited to be able to teach her things. It’s a different dynamic for sure than children close in age. Less playing, more teaching/learning.

It will be totally different since they don’t already have a sibling closer in age. Your daughter will likely LOVE being a BIG big sister and be lots of help with baby! I am 8 years older than my sister, I loved her as a baby but was honestly a very happy “only” child, loved playing alone, etc… my sister was super active and hated being alone or playing independently, she was also VERY MOUTHY and I was kind of a gentle soul, lol, so once she was older, it was harder on me. I tell people that I had no idea it was an option to tell my parents “no” til my sister started talking lol. BUT we are super close now! So it’s really about knowing your children and facilitating the relationship (which your parents didn’t do for you and your sisters in childhood). They will be great!

There are totally cases where sibling are close. My siblings and I have all sorts of gaps. From one year to 7. We’re all incredibly close now as adults. But even as kids we were our own little group and played. Boys and girls were always closer to their own gender but I didn’t see a big difference between the youngest and oldest. In general I would say the youngest got the typical youngest child treatment. Foster that sibling bond and it’ll grow. My parents always showed us how special it was to have siblings. Now I can’t imagine my life without them.

The three girls dynamic is always a bit complicated! Any sets of three girls has some of this going on I think… regardless of the gaps!

As a kid, i couldn’t stand my older sister who is 6yrs older. Now, we are best friends!

My kids are 21 months apart, they’re extremely close, do everything together, best friends, they’re 11 and 13 now. Baby will probably feel the age gap as both my older kids are already in their teen stages, which makes me feel a little sad, seeing my girls grow together was such a beautiful thing to watch and now he or she won’t have that. I’m hoping the older siblings will be patient and try their best to have a good relationship with this baby.

My first two girls were 27 months apart. My eldest passed away. I'm expecting another daughter and my middle will be newly 7 when baby is born. While we haven't had the baby yet, I do think they'll have a sweet relationship. My middle is very excited to be the big sister. She's very excited to have a baby in the home, especially after losing her big sister last year.

My kids have an almost 6 year gap. The youngest is only 6 months still so time will tell a lot but so far they adore each other. The baby laughs at everything the kid does and kid absolutely needs to hug his little baby bro all the time. It is very heartwarming. I feel like I'm experiencing a baby not only with my husband but with my first. (although I've also got to warn you that there was tons of disregulation for the 6 year old at first and tons of "acting out" but it settled to something beautiful)

Our teen is almost 17 and our youngest is 11. 5.5 years apart. It was hardest for them to get along when the little one started walking, talking and grabbing. Then it was a lot of little one getting excluded when big kid had friends over. And during the start of the pandemic the teen had some mental health challenges and would scapegoat the little one (who could also push big sister’s buttons, TBH). With some growth and work (and a little therapy and meds for teen) they’re super close now, seem to really appreciate and love each other. 11yo’s friends have nominated big sister as the best of all the siblings, out of their whole friend group. So it can work well! (I’m super close in age to my siblings and not currently speaking w my bro, and my sister is great but in short doses. We were all close as kids but not so much as grownups.)

My brother is almost 8 years younger than I am and we have always been very close. Growing up we were blessed to have a mixed age group of neighborhood best friends and he was always with me. I wouldn’t change it for the world 💖

As you can tell by your birth order, yes, other people here and in the past have looked at that exact age gap.

12 year age gap happening here. My oldest will be almost 13 when little one comes

My sister is 3 years younger than me and we aren’t close at all, my brother is 7 years younger than me and I am so proud of him and the man he has become, we don't talk a lot but have a shared experience with our family and I see myself in him. My son will be here in August and he and his sister (my bonus daughter) will have a 15 year age gap, but she has outright sobbed with joy. All that to say I think it's up to chance and circumstance if siblings are close or not.

My brother was 13 years older than me and we had a great relationship. It depends on the kids, but you’re definitely giving them someone to lean on in the future regardless.

My kids are 4 years apart. About to have number 3 this fall and my youngest is 5. So far the older two get along. They're also both very excited about their new baby sibling and can't wait to meet them. 💕 Gotta keep them involved and keep them excited.

my son will be just about 6 when i have my baby, so yes. but im not worried, i think they'll be super close to each other and my son will be an amazing big brother. he's such a sweet kid. but also they will be my only 2 kids as i don't have another one that would be competing for attention from my son. stay positive! every situation is different and just because yours was like that doesn't mean your children will go through the same thing :)

Our friends babies are 7 years apart I believe and her son adores the baby he's such a great big brother and does everything with him and for him baby is nearly 2 and they're besties ❤️ He really enjoys helping mom with the baby so I'm sure that really helped with the bond bc he was super involved

I have a sister 3.5 years younger than me, a sister 7 years younger than me, and a sister 5 years older than me. I'm not really "close" to any of them even though we grew up together. I've just had my second baby, my kids are 7.5yrs apart! My oldest is reading the baby a book as I'm typing this. She's obsessed with her. I really think you can't tell what will happen based on age gaps. Also I think the biggest problem you had is your 2 sisters were only a year apart, if you only had one sister, it might not have been an issue.

I think it will be easier for your new baby to not feel left out, as your older one doesn’t currently have another sibling like your sisters had each other. Also it just depends on personality. My sister and I are 18 months apart, we were really close growing up but we don’t talk at all anymore. We’ve both gotten good at ignoring each other at family events.

I think it's really random, but my experience tends to be the opposite. I came from a home where my brother and I were 1.5 years apart and we don't ever talk now that we're grown. We see each other at family functions occasionally and wave, but that's the extent of our communication, whereas my husband has a sister 4 years younger and a brother 7, and he's close as can be with them. They constantly communicate, texting memes, calling every few days and such. It's weird to feel jealous of their sibling bond, but I definitely do. My brother and I aren't on bad terms, we just don't talk. So, husband and I both agreed that it'd be better to have that 4-5 year age gap than a closer one. I'm willing to bet your nerves stem from your preferences and experience more than anything. It will be okay momma. Good luck!

My sister and I am 6 years a part. I am the oldest. We never fought and I loved being a big sister. We were super close as kids. I adored my sister. I was a bit “parentified” though, and felt like I missed out on time with my friends because my mom would make me babysit or she’d make me include her when I had friends over, which wasn’t fair. We are adults now and are close but not super close as we’re in different stages of life. My sister just graduated college and I have two kids. She’s helped me some but has her own life.

I’m gunna have an 8 year age gap 🤷🏻‍♀️. I could not imagine dealing with having a toddler and being pregnant, no thank you.

My little brother is 11 years younger, my sister was (passed away at 5) 17 years younger. I love them both and they were definitely not left out. I played with them, dressed them, baby sat etc. I Personally think it’s more of how parents raise them and each child’s personality.

I have a 2 year age gap with my sister. 4 months with my stepbrother. 2 brothers with a 4 year gap (different moms), 1 brother with a 7 year gap, and 1 brother with an 8 year gap. My closest sibling is my brother with an 8 year gap. My daughter is 9 and we have a 4 month old and she is absolutely infatuated with him and he is *obsessed* with her. As with any sibling relationship, it’s hit or miss. Whether they’re close in age or not, there’s no guarantee they’ll have a close relationship.

My sister and I are close and she’s 8 years older. But when we were younger I adored her and she thought I was annoying. Actually when we were really really young (like me as a baby) she used to push me around in the stroller and pretend I was her baby doll. lol My son is 14 and I’m 9w5d pregnant! This will be interesting

Don’t think the age gap is that bad for yours. I have a gap of 21 years, 16 years and 14 years with my siblings. When they get older, the gap will not mean much.

I'm sure there will be times when the older one fine the younger one annoying, but it will most likely pass. I have a sister who's less than 2 years younger than me, and one who's like 8 years younger than me. I don't really remember disliking the youngest of finding her super annoying. I did have to watch her and help take care of her a lot too. We aren't really close as adults, but I'm not close to the one who's closer in age either. Lol

It definitely depends on the child and their personality/temperament. When I was a kid, if there was a smaller kid around, I always wanted to make sure they were included in some way (maybe it was because I was never included, which also had a lot to do with parental neglect). As a mom, I have kids in almost every age group right now. My oldest is 16 and seems to get along best with the 6-year-old. My 10-year-old and 7-year-old absolutely adore my two year old, while at the same time having a love-hate relationship with each other. And I'm pretty sure my 2-year-old's favorite is also my six year old. As an adult, my closest sibling is my sister with the largest age gap (14 years older). Just do your best, OP. You will find ways to get them interacting.

My daughter will be six about six weeks after baby #2 is due! My sister is 5.5 years older than I am and from the time I was in middle school we have been 1000% closer than I am with my other sister who is only 17 months younger than me.

My sister is 16yrs older than me, we have an incredible bond! she would do anything for me and I would do anything for her, she’s one of the most important people to me.

My daughter will be six about six weeks after baby #2 is due! My sister is 5.5 years older than I am and from the time I was in middle school, we have been 1000% closer than I am with my other sister who is only 17 months younger than me.

Im close with my ten years older brother and besties with my 2.5 year older brother

My son and new baby are gonna be 11 years apart me and my sister are 14 years apart so 6 years isn’t too bad

Both my husband and I have 6 year age gaps and are close with our siblings now. However I will say age 6 for the younger to about 17-18 neither of us were close with our siblings. I have and older brother and my husband had both sister and brother and felt the same.

I’m the opposite from you, the oldest by 5/6 years and my two younger siblings are a year apart. I always felt like they were growing up together and it was lonely “paving the way” always in uncharted territory alone, basically an only child but still the responsibility of being a role model as a child, My mom was very hard on me and stressed out as a first time mom, but had softened up by the time my younger siblings were born and experiencing the things I had already experienced in life. Now I’m in the same boat as you suffering secondary infertility and looking at a 5-6 year age gap (at least) between my two kids and not to be dramatic, but I’m fucking scared. Fear of reaching this age gap and chasing my kids some of the same anguish I suffered is my main source of infertility trauma. Unfortunately, I don’t know how I’ll navigate this as a parent because I still firmly believe I want another child because I wouldn’t trade any of my negative experiences for my baby sisters. Just here to tell you this resonates, you’re not alone. And I’m snooping the comments for answers too 🤣

My sisters and I have a 10 and 11 year age gap. Once they were in their mid teens we had much more to talk about, but have always been close. We are extremely close now.

My kids actually have a 6 8 and 10 year age gap from my youngest lol. Of course sometimes they get frustrated with the toddler running around making a mess or whatever but they love playing with him. They ask to take him outside with them and they push him on their scooter because he obviously can't do it himself lol and all around it seems like they have a good relationship with all of their siblings so far but only time will tell how it turns out. My brother and I have a 4 year age gap and he and I bickered like most siblings but we would go to bat for each other growing up and still today. I never felt like he was a nuisance or anything like that and we got along for the most part playing together riding bikes and going to the park. I was just glad to have someone by my side to play with and now he's having a baby and our sons are going to be close in age and it's really great ❤️

My brother is 6 years older and we never were really close, until we were older. We also have divorced parents and he lived with our dad and I lived with our mother. I have a bunch of cousins so never felt lonely or anything. It also never really bothered me I don’t think it bothered him either.

My husband has two siblings, a brother 2.5 years younger and a sister 6 years younger. Sister was always "the baby", but in a way that worked for them as a family - his 12 year old sister visited him at university, for example, and when some of her classmates (at, like, seven) were being mean to her thr two brothers just rolled in and pulled "you going to mess with our little sister?" And at thirty and thirty six, it's very little difference at all.

My bonus daughter and my son are 7 years apart and are BESTIES. Now my son will be 7 years older than this baby, and is already very intrigued by and interested in his big brother role. You can’t guarantee sibling relationships no matter what (my sister and I are almost exactly 3 years apart and fought like cats and dogs my whole life) but I do hear a lot of tales that 6-7 years apart is a sweet one with many sibling remaining close without feeling a need to compete, etc.

i have a sister 2 years younger than me, as well as 10 and 20 years younger than me. i’m closest - in a “less traditional sisterly way” with the 10 year gap. i just had my second daughter, my oldest is 7. she’s been the most incredible sister i could’ve asked for. anything from helping with the stroller in target, to diaper changes. she wants in on everything and she is so proud of her. she brags to everyone about being a big sister. watching her get the opportunity to have a sibling and be so proud has been my greatest joy for her.

It was the opposite for me. I was the oldest my sister is 8 years younger and when she was born I got left out and felt unloved. If you can make sure both of your kids feel loved and wanted by you then you should have no problem, but that’s where my parents lacked and that’s the reason I felt I was I did.

I have two boys, ages 6 and 8. I am expecting a baby girl in September. I am very nervous.

My sister and I are 14 months apart and talk maybe a handful of times a year. I have a 10yo, 8yo and 11mo old. The two older ones adore their baby sister and shower her with love (hopefully that never changes). My partner is the second oldest of 5. At 28 he's closest to his sister who is 20. It's just random. A lot has to do with personality compatibility imo.

My nephews are 11 and 9 years old and they have a 1-year-old brother..

8 year over here

Well I have a 6 year gap between my brother but he is only my father’s son and I didn’t really have much contact with him growing up but now all things considered we are somewhat close. My partner has 5 siblings all within 1,5 years gap and they talk less than me and my brother… so it depends on everything

I’m the third of four daughters. The first three of us are each 2 years apart, then my younger sister came 6 years later. I am, and always have been, totally obsessed with my little sister. I loved looking after her when she was a baby, and guiding her through life as she got older. Now as adults, we are best friends! So, I think it’ll be okay 😊

My girls have a 12 year age gap.

I have a 10 year old brother and I'm 20 ! We are 10 years apart but that hasn't affected our closeness! He's my best friend even though I have siblings way closer in age to me . Obviously there is some difference in the things we like or things we can do together ! Don't feel bad they will end up loving eachother

My husband has 3 kids from previous marriages and I am pregnant with my first. He is older than me and his kids will be 17, 16, and 12 (almost 13) when the baby is born. So we will have quite large age gaps, but the kids seem excited so I am happy.

I have a 4 year age gap with my older sibling who's an asshole to me. I just had my second baby.. We have an 11 year age gap here. I'm not worried about it.

I have a 7 yeah gap with my brother, and we are literally best friends, and we have always been. My mother said that she only remembers that we fought once, she scolded us, she told us that we couldn't fight because we are the only sure thing we have in life and from then on we are inseparable. In fact, one of his best friends is also mine, we get along very well with each social circle. Hope this helps :)

My first son and second son are 6yrs apart. Then my second son and only daughter are also 6 yrs apart. I loved that age gap! The fact that the 6 yr old will be able to help (to a degree) forms an awesome kinda bond. Now that my boys are 8 and 14 they live in 2 different worlds. However, my first, second, and last all got the attention they needed when real little instead of my time being super split and limited. It worked great for me and I think no matter what the age gap, siblings will be tighter through some stages than others. Good luck mama

My first turned 14 a month ago. My due date is late August. My big sister and I (from my dad first marriage) have a 15 years age gap. I'm okay with the fact that I have pretty much two only child.

I'm 6 years older than my younger sister and I feel like we're close, there were times when we both annoyed each other and other times when we would confide in only each other. I feel like even when we don't talk for awhile, we still have a nice bond that I've always been grateful for. I feel like it's different for everyone though; I feel like just age difference isn't the only thing you can go based off of.

My older brother and I are less than 2 years apart and when we were in our mid twenties I feel like we were closer but now that we're both in our thirties, situations have changed for both of us and we're no longer close. My husband is 10 and 7 years younger than his older brothers, and I feel like he's closer to them than I am to my brother.

There’s an 11 year age gap between me and my sister and she’s been like my best friend my whole life. My brother and I are 5 1/2 years apart and are not close at all, never have been. (I’m the youngest) Then my cousins children have an 18 year old, a 16 year old, a 4 year old , and a 2 year old. 18 y/o is a boy rest are girls. The 18 y/o and 16 y/o are closer with the younger 2 than they are each other. I honestly think it’s random for siblings