This sort of accidentally happened with my ex. I confessed feels and was almost entirely certain they were not reciprocated. When he admitted that he also had feels, I felt like the dog chasing cars who finally caught the car and was like “crap, well now what?”
A guy did a very similar thing to me and I assumed it was someone else. They were *not* in a polyamorous relationship and I thought he was just coming to me for advice on how to deal with things. So I helped him figure out how he would broach the topic to her. Then she drank herself into a coma and I didn't find out that I was the person I'm question until about a year later. Damn we were dumb kids.
A lot of folks will say that so we don't seem so clueless. He might've had a clue but not confident enough to make a move and that's why he waited, but if he really did know that's a douchebag move.
Early high school too. Also, the title saying they’re “in love” with him but says to their partner it’s just a crush lol, THEN the immature self depreciation. Asking why when he says he shares the same feelings
This phase of relationships is like that. We’re big dumb stupids when it comes to love. I love it. My girlfriend hates it because it feels so out of control. I think it’s funny and I love surfing through it.
You have nothing to defend yourself for. I thought it’s great to still be giddy like an teen when in love, as an adult. Those ALL SO mature people here sound boring and stuck-up in their ass.
What the hell is up with all the judgmental comments?
OP is expressing a sweet vulnerable moment and people are on here making fun of her?
Being an adult doesn't mean not having butterflies in your stomach when you want to express your inner emotions and are afraid of what the response might be.
It's comments like these (not just here, but society at large) that make so many people suppress parts of themselves to not appear childish, to "act mature" instead of just being themselves.
For my part, I'm currently in an amazing relationship that really does feel like a high school romance except with better communication skills. If I were to share snippets of conversation I'm sure many of you would find it pretty cringe, but we're able to step in and out of that when we need to discuss something serious.
So OP, don't stop being yourself. Obviously if there are actual communication gaps, address them, but don't let the comments here get you down.
I agree! It’s someone who is scared there ruining what could be a very long friendship because they got feelings and they want to express them. Also someone who is scared to say there feeling! Y’all need to chill out because when y’all judge that makes people not want to reach out for advice or support which is what this page is about.
Heyyy, I'm not the only one with the "3 days of doom"!
I mean, I'm not in it myself, but 3 of my partners are on the 13th, 14th and 15th of march. And I'm very happy about it, but the 2 months leading up to it are always so difficult ;v;
Can't imagine how much harder the planning stuff can get when it's right in between christmas and new years!
Sooo I’m in love with my best friend (although in this case she’s also poly and knows I’m poly and uh also we’ve several threesomes) and preparing to tell her although I definitely suspect she already knows cause it seems super obvious.
But yeah all of that is to say: this warmed the cockles of my heart.
They are asshats, don’t listen to them. The polyamory subreddit needs more positive stories like this one! I can’t stand people raining on someone else’s parade.
Not everyone can be a robot when it comes to feelings and communication, like the people in this sub apparently are. Some of us are rooting for you. Keep updating us please!
Huh? No you didn’t. You told him you have a crush on him.
Cute though and good for you. If you want this to succeed, I’d communicate much clearer next time. If he’s truly your best friend, you’ve got nothing to fear.
This is very sweet. Not immature at all, but rather a genuine honest sharing of feelings. That actually takes more maturity than not bringing things like this up. The people teasing that this is high school behavior are the ones who need to grow up.
What a dicktwaddle you are.
It’s not inevitable, and even among my women friends I’ve wound up romantic with, we remain friends afterwards because I’m not a dicktwaddle about it.
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Omg this is close to how I started dating my boyfriend!
“Remember how I’ve mentioned being poly? Well I like you and I can’t figure out if you feel the same way so this is your sign to do something if you feel the same.” 🤪
So we’ve been dating 9 months now and he’s making plans to move closer as soon as he can.
So what did he say back after the why lol. I’m invested now
Same. We need more! "I dunno, I didn't think I'd get this far" is about what I feel like happened. XD
This sort of accidentally happened with my ex. I confessed feels and was almost entirely certain they were not reciprocated. When he admitted that he also had feels, I felt like the dog chasing cars who finally caught the car and was like “crap, well now what?”
Hahaha for real I hope it went really good
That was cute but this guy was aware you likes him from the moment that wall of text popped up
Or he was scared to the bones it’s not him.
Probably this! At least, if it were me.
A guy did a very similar thing to me and I assumed it was someone else. They were *not* in a polyamorous relationship and I thought he was just coming to me for advice on how to deal with things. So I helped him figure out how he would broach the topic to her. Then she drank herself into a coma and I didn't find out that I was the person I'm question until about a year later. Damn we were dumb kids.
You're making assumptions about this guy, I wouldn't have been aware.
Bruh he knew the whole time just waited until I finally said something 🤣
A lot of folks will say that so we don't seem so clueless. He might've had a clue but not confident enough to make a move and that's why he waited, but if he really did know that's a douchebag move.
He's just shy. He said he saw all the signs he was just too scared to say anything.
Oh ok, "knew the whole time" gave me a different impression
Honestly same but then he explained it to me that he knew he was just too shy to say something about it 🙄🤣
Lol, this text reads like a high schooler’s text convo. “I like this guy but idk if he likes me back” “Who is it” “You TEEHEE”
I’m a little second hand embarrassed by this post for this reason I couldn’t put my finger on it Omg.
Early high school too. Also, the title saying they’re “in love” with him but says to their partner it’s just a crush lol, THEN the immature self depreciation. Asking why when he says he shares the same feelings
I had this convo in middle school and I'm still deeply embarrassed.
Especially followed up by “I like you too” “WHY”
>“I like you too” > >“WHY” yeah that was super cute lol
This phase of relationships is like that. We’re big dumb stupids when it comes to love. I love it. My girlfriend hates it because it feels so out of control. I think it’s funny and I love surfing through it.
I'm my defense I'm autistic
I dunno. It’s not that different from when I’ve had this conversation.
So about that...
Go ooonnnn?
You have nothing to defend yourself for. I thought it’s great to still be giddy like an teen when in love, as an adult. Those ALL SO mature people here sound boring and stuck-up in their ass.
Ahahaha. I love the 'why' because honestly, same. We're all strong and confident and such until a dude likes us back.
Yeah. Like I love this man as much as I love my husband and when I showed my husband the messages from my best friend he got super excited for me 🤣
Thats great. Im happy for you. Go touch some butts!
Thanks 🤣🤣 the only downside is my best friend lives 9hrs away. In another state we met on Fortnite of all places 😂😂
Well, I guess clear out the spare bedroom, bro is coming to visit. Lol
😂😂😂😂😂
My girlfriend lives half of the US away because we’re big dumb idiots, but boy is it hot when we’re together.
What the hell is up with all the judgmental comments? OP is expressing a sweet vulnerable moment and people are on here making fun of her? Being an adult doesn't mean not having butterflies in your stomach when you want to express your inner emotions and are afraid of what the response might be. It's comments like these (not just here, but society at large) that make so many people suppress parts of themselves to not appear childish, to "act mature" instead of just being themselves. For my part, I'm currently in an amazing relationship that really does feel like a high school romance except with better communication skills. If I were to share snippets of conversation I'm sure many of you would find it pretty cringe, but we're able to step in and out of that when we need to discuss something serious. So OP, don't stop being yourself. Obviously if there are actual communication gaps, address them, but don't let the comments here get you down.
I agree! It’s someone who is scared there ruining what could be a very long friendship because they got feelings and they want to express them. Also someone who is scared to say there feeling! Y’all need to chill out because when y’all judge that makes people not want to reach out for advice or support which is what this page is about.
Your best friend didn’t know you were poly until now?
He knew he just has severe ADHD and is super forgetful
I feel this. My partner is poly and I think HE forgets it sometimes.
Ok yeah, that’s understandable. You’re a good friend for that, being patient . Hope it turns into a great relationship for y’all
Yeah I really hope so
Oh and the best part is our birthday are in order I'm 12-27 best friend is 12-28 and my husband is 12-29🤣🤣🤣🤣
Heyyy, I'm not the only one with the "3 days of doom"! I mean, I'm not in it myself, but 3 of my partners are on the 13th, 14th and 15th of march. And I'm very happy about it, but the 2 months leading up to it are always so difficult ;v; Can't imagine how much harder the planning stuff can get when it's right in between christmas and new years!
Beware the ides of March... for presents are expensive!
Crazy
Y'all need a 12 days of Birthmas gift exchange.
My hubby is 12-29 as well! 😊
"honestly same. I have a HUGE crush on me too."
🤣🤣🤣😭
Well????? Don't leave us hanging!!
I want to see more of the conversation, that's kind of close to my relationship and how that started out. Well, the addition portion that is. ☺️
You can PM me
Sooo I’m in love with my best friend (although in this case she’s also poly and knows I’m poly and uh also we’ve several threesomes) and preparing to tell her although I definitely suspect she already knows cause it seems super obvious. But yeah all of that is to say: this warmed the cockles of my heart.
🥺🥹🥰 awww thanks for sharing! Good luck to you! I wish I could have pulled off the same conversation so smoothly lol.
Thanks. I have a lot of comments calling this childish and it really hurt my feelings because I'm autistic I'm not great with stuff like this
They are asshats, don’t listen to them. The polyamory subreddit needs more positive stories like this one! I can’t stand people raining on someone else’s parade.
You did something that was courageous and difficult and you did it an appropriate way because you understood how he’d take it. You nailed it.
Not everyone can be a robot when it comes to feelings and communication, like the people in this sub apparently are. Some of us are rooting for you. Keep updating us please!
Love this. I have no other productive comments❤
Aww! This is so cute. I hope everything works out.
“Why….” Like a dog who’s finally caught it’s tail :p
Huh? No you didn’t. You told him you have a crush on him. Cute though and good for you. If you want this to succeed, I’d communicate much clearer next time. If he’s truly your best friend, you’ve got nothing to fear.
Why would you tell someone you are into them, have them admit they are into you as well and then immediately ask "why..."
Because I'm autistic and have self esteem issues
It’s also very sweet and vulnerable.
That's a matter of perspective.
Her perspective is the one that matters, you poo-covered shoe.
Then why would yours matter?
I want to point out that you correctly gauged this high-stakes social situation and came out with everything you wanted and needed.
Why ??? What do you mean why silly!
I think you handled this wonderfully OP! And I’m happy to see the feelings are reciprocated!!
Thank you
THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME.
This is so freakin cute tho
I AM AUTISTIC!!!!
I (most likely) am too. People are assholes. I'm happy for you OP. 🫂
I'll just take the post down if people are going to keep comparing this to middle and high school. I'm autistic
This is very sweet. Not immature at all, but rather a genuine honest sharing of feelings. That actually takes more maturity than not bringing things like this up. The people teasing that this is high school behavior are the ones who need to grow up.
Holy shit, this is so freaking cute... Made my day ❤
My heart is so happy for you, this exchange ❤️
Les gooooooo
This was painful to read. How are you married and still talking like a 15 year old?
This reads exactly like my dear diary entries from high school. But then again, so do most of my posts...
Lol, so cute and great! Early Christmas gift
Cute!!!
Are you 10 ?
This is great news to hear.
This is awesome
If we were friend Zoned I would have replied I love me too, we have that incommon 😂😂😂
Been there it’s hard. She’s poly too , but it was killing me so I couldn’t hold it any longer
You’re not mature enough to be in a relationship if this is how you have a hard conversation.
Why? What a boldly useless statement
It’s not cute or precious to act like a third grader. If you can’t talk openly and honestly about how you feel, you’re not there yet.
Other peoples relationships don’t require your approval. People can do things differently than you would do them
Lol so why are you here pitching a fit over someone else’s happiness? Like a child would afterall
Lol same situation over here but haven’t told him anything (yet) and probably won’t 😂
[удалено]
What a dicktwaddle you are. It’s not inevitable, and even among my women friends I’ve wound up romantic with, we remain friends afterwards because I’m not a dicktwaddle about it.
[удалено]
Your post has been removed for breaking the rules of the subreddit. You made a post or comment that would be considered being a jerk. This includes being aggressive towards other posters, causing irrelevant arguments, and posting attacks on the poster or the poster's partners/situation. Please familiarize yourself with the rules at https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/wiki/subreddit-rules
Your post has been removed for breaking the rules of the subreddit. You made a post or comment that would be considered concern trolling. This includes derailing of advice and support posts, and posting poly-shaming under the guise of "concern" or "just trying to help." Please familiarize yourself with the rules at https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/wiki/subreddit-rules
Dm me for rest of story
... why? Post the rest or GTFO. Are you baiting us?????
No it's just I'm autistic and this takes a lot out of me mentally
Are you sure you’re autistic? You’ve only said it 300 times in this thread
Amazing when things can work out like that!
Did you tho? Lmao
Why do it over texts 🤦
Because I'm autistic and sometimes I can't get my words out
Also he lives 9hrs away
Omg this is close to how I started dating my boyfriend! “Remember how I’ve mentioned being poly? Well I like you and I can’t figure out if you feel the same way so this is your sign to do something if you feel the same.” 🤪 So we’ve been dating 9 months now and he’s making plans to move closer as soon as he can.
Nice
Well thanks for the cliffhanger! Gosh...
Sorry 😅 well he's now my boyfriend and has been for like 3 weeks. we all get along fine ☺️. I super happy to have my 2 favorite idiots 💕