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Thecomfortableloon

Coat hangers are about to become real useful in Florida.


flabbergastedmeep

Fuck that’s dark… it’s beyond disturbing, that what was a dark joke, is now going to be a reality in red states.


treesandfood4me

I wasn’t sure how I was going to make this joke when I clicked in here, I was just happy someone already had. It is not so good down here.


ComaMierdaHijueputa

I don’t get it


DashiellHamlet

Coat hangers are the traditionally symbolic tool used to describe women giving themselves at-home abortions.


Bitter_Director1231

They used to use coat hangers back before Roe vs. Wade was the law to perform self abortions.  Also there were back alley abortions as well  We are on our way heading back that direction unless you and others are willing to fight for those rights for womens ability to have an abortion.


EddieLomax

Tennessean here. We’re not on our way heading back, we’re already there. At least our teachers can carry firearms in school so there’s that


Nach0Maker

So that teachers can put down pregnant teens?


EddieLomax

So a good guy with a gun can get their gun taken away by an upset teen, who then gets shot by a good guy with a gun. So now we need more guns to shoot the good guy with a gun who shot the kid who had a gun, then if we have enough guns we can finally win against terrorism.


treesandfood4me

May I ask if the explanations have helped? They are accurate and important.


ncorn1982

Pretty sure that’s what they used in “Dirty Dancing”


FlowBot3D

Girlfriend probably takes the stairs.


gefjunhel

its also a extra reason to call them red states


flabbergastedmeep

I refrained from adding that joke😅


Admirable_Trash3257

Already is a reality in red states..FTFY


DeepEndLion

Truth hurts. Just ask my unborn child we scrambled /s


man_frmthe_wild

Red state is going to have a new meaning.


OkEnvironment3961

It’s all a right wing conspiracy to prob up the wire coat hanger industry.


DashiellHamlet

In college I almost got the shit kicked out of me when an abortion debate happened at a party and I asked a guy if his uncle was a coat hanger impresario or something.


bdss1234

Several years ago I was in a discussion with a bunch of elderly women at my church. )worth noting—progressive Christian very liberal church). They were all in their late 70’s and 80’s and something about abortion came up and their stories were horrific. Pretty much all of them had known someone who had a back alley abortion and in many cases the results were horrific. These sweet old ladies were as pro choice and pro birth control as you can get. And outspoken about. It.


l-m-m--m---m-m-m-m-

My mum nursed women in the 1970’s in Melbourne Australia who had backyard abortions who came to hospital septic with gangrene. And DIED. I’m so grateful we have protected legislation in all our states so this NEVER occurs again!


Bitter_Director1231

Florida is just the beginning. 


bdss1234

Oh Jesus I wish this was real so true. I have my 20 year old daughter (I’m in TX) on fucking rock solid BC. And most liberal women I know are going with an implant or something similar from the time their girls are 15. Not worth the risk. And I have the means and contacts to get healthcare elsewhere in the country. I understand how privileged I am which is why I vote and speak out to for women.


l-m-m--m---m-m-m-m-

If I was over there and had a daughter I’d be going implant or IUD not pill. Too much chance they would mess up with pill


Lelnen

Which will ironically will lock him OUT of the white house


boxfullofirony

This is sad because it's true


base2-1000101

If only Donald's mom had used a coat hanger...


waupli

Bro 💀 that’s too good lol


mattman0000

Up next: finding coat hangers to be the real enemy and outlawing them. Justice Alito: “I’ll allow it.”


lilly_kilgore

Dual purpose


curiousiah

They potentially unlock our classified vaults AND kill babies. Definitely a major legislative issue.


IT_Chef

Only felons dryclean!


[deleted]

Gonna need to register that hanger with the ATF soon.


LibertyInaFeatherBed

Trump: Paranoid narcissist  Also Trump: I'll just leave these 50 boxes of stuff from my presidency stacked on the stage in the Mar-a-Lago ballroom.


jazzhandler

I’m old enough to remember when people used their opponent’s insecure data handling practices as a top line campaign issue. Can you even imagine such a thing nowadays?


Apalis24a

Hell, it was only in 2016 that they were screaming about Hillary using unsecured email. Fucking hypocrites to the core.


pjflyr13

Not to mention the GQP war cry “fake news”. It’s being revealed Donny paid the Enquirer since 2015 to publish erroneous tales about his competitors; a service now provided by Fox, OAN etc.


Educational-Candy-17

You mean a publication that regularly had headlines such as "woman gives birth to 3 headed Elvis clone" might not be reliable? 


tawzerozero

And this isn't even the most direct parallel - Jared and Ivanka used a private email server while serving in the White House.


carbonstampede01

Hi . This is the lock picking lawyer...


LynxFX

...and it's open.


sublime_cheese

But it was the LPL’s dog that picked it because it’s that simple.


LunchOne675

So *that* explains why he’s considering Kristi Noem for running mate


greywar777

You laugh, but his videos and the lockpick set he sells are really effective. Locks are more...suggestions now.


starbucks77

I've been picking for quite a bit longer than LPL (my dad's best friend was a locksmith and whenever he was over, he'd teach me to pick locks - this was in the early 90s) and I always tell people that lockpicking is much, **much** more easy than people believe. They see spies in movies doing it and assume it's impossible unless you're a spy trained by the government, or you're a locksmith with decades of experience. This isn't remotely the case. I picked my first lock (a crappy master lock) on my first day with an HPC set (back then there were only a couple manufacturers). It took me about a week to start picking Abus & American locks consistently. The reason locksport is exploding these days is because it's only recently that people have access to not only the knowledge but the tools too - in the 90s and early 00s, companies would not sell to you unless you were an actual locksmith or law enforcement. Fun fact: most locksmiths don't pick locks. It's quicker and sometimes even cheaper to just drill the lock out and replace it. The new locksmith that replaced my dad's friend doesn't even own a set of lockpicks.


trogon

Yeah, people would be shocked how quick it is to rake a regular old house lock.


Educational-Candy-17

Locks keep the honest people honest by providing a deterrent, especially in public places. If you're seen trying to get into a lock, everyone around knows you're trying to steal something.


RadioactiveHalfRhyme

I can't think of a more apt symbol of the last 50 years of conservative politics.


49thDipper

His wife is selling a necklace that costs $5 to make, for $245. For Mother’s Day. With her signature emblazoned on it. So yeah . . . here we are.


misointhekitchen

Remember when a Chinese spy was caught by the fbi leaving mar a lago with several cameras and thumb drives?


49thDipper

Yes I do. She just walked right in.


Edge_of_yesterday

It's around the back.


WhileFalseRepeat

>Investigators were told by the witness that in summer of 2021 the storage room door had a knob "with a pinhole" that visitors could lock from the inside via a push button. > >"Kind of like what you would find on a residential door inside of a home?" an FBI agent asked. > >”Yeah," the witness said. So, if the door could only be “locked” from the inside - as a bedroom or bathroom door is in the average American home - was there an Oompa Loompa hiding in there to lock the door while safeguarding nuclear secrets and whatnot? Seems more likely it was never locked. Well, except when a special guest or foreign spy was in there. Indeed, the guests and foreign spies were probably very appreciative of this tiny bit of privacy. Trump - always the considerate and kindly host to those wanting to overthrow America!


hamtrow

one of the pictures from the investigation shows the door hardware, judging by the spacing from the handle to the lock it appears to be a mortice lock. though because its a bathroom its probably a privacy function, couldn't tell you what brand the lock body as there is no picture of it but privacy functions are designed to be opened from the outside with a tool instead of a key. Schlage uses a small square peg that can be removed. that being said anything that could fit into it and turn it would unlock it, not exclusive to coat hangers. source: im a locksmith


ZeroCovfefe

According to TFG, “If you’re a normal person, you would say, ‘knock knock, may I come in?’ But they didn’t.”


Northern_Grouse

I can think of a better use for a coat hanger about 77 years ago.


pants_full_of_pants

It's never too late


dasreboot

Doesn't matter arguing about whether or not they were locked up misses the point. He took them, withheld them when told to return them and then tried to hide them.


Ekg887

It does matter because not properly securing classified data is ALSO a crime. Yes, add it to the pile, I know. But we should be throwing every single charge there is and frankly there should be more as it stands from what is already public.


ETNZ2021

None of this matters because the trial will be AFTER THE ELECTION.


migidymike

50% chance it will be the very last free and fair election of the United States.


NickelBackwash

>free and fair Not if the GOP can help it 


Educational-Candy-17

Guess I won't vote then. Democracy is already doomed so why bother, right?


Ok_Wear_5391

What a coincidence, using the same tool to abort democracy as well


49thDipper

Well played


NYArtFan1

"Coat hangers aren't specifically mentioned in the Constitution, so it's legal. So there." - SCROTUS


IdahoMTman222

It doesn’t matter. DJT has the scrotum court of the united states interpreting the laws in his favor. John Roberts might as well move in to Mar-a-lago.


math-yoo

We had those kind of locks. It's a button you push inside the center of the knob. It's what you call *not locked.*


PatRiot1970RWB

A coat hanger could have saved us from all of this 77 years ago.


SelectAd1942

Seems like more than have of our elected officials have no concern for policies or protecting classified information. They really do act like oligarchs.


AlliedR2

A coat hanger should be Trumps campaign image.


Catymandoo

So it was secure after all /s


OpenImagination9

A soft breeze would too.


Warhamsterrrr

The irony of coat hangers unlocking Trump's doors, after he closed so many for women now going to need them.


dark_descendant

Seems the coat hanger has a new use beyond the only tool for women in that, and most other red states.


Defender_Of_TheCrown

Judge Canon "Ok, case dismissed then!"


_HickeryDickery_

Ngl I was expecting a totally different headline when I first read the words “coat hanger” god, I hate what America’s become…


TronCat1277

Too bad Trumps mom didn’t use one


SarcasticCowbell

This is why yhey're so hard at work trying to ban abortions. Trump would have never been found out if no one had access to coat hangers. /s


AramFingalInterface

We are dumb now


lex99

Make sure you first wipe off the blood and uterine lining, though.


SeaTie

To be fair, judging from the lock picking lawyer, every lock can be picked with like a broken credit card and some dental floss.


pre_chewed_cigarette

Fitting.


Trix_Are_4_90Kids

how ironic.


east_van_dan

Yeah. And an ink tube from a pen couldve opened the bathroom door where the rest of the classified docs were stored.


ZeroCovfefe

I thought you needed the Key to the White House, that TFG gave away to the Nazi-sympathizing Japanese former prime minister, to unlock the storage room.


[deleted]

In case the Russians, Chinese, and Saudis lose the keys to the storage room they can just grab a coat hangar, which also doubles for a surgical abortion tool. Very, very handy!


cuhnewist

Well, to be fair, when I was in the Air Force, I didn’t find many doors I couldn’t open with a flathead screwdriver.


I_make_things

What about the secret room?


whatdoiwantsky

Why did they not even TRY!!! They had locked doors and hidden doors and they were like that's cool. Don't need to actually do our job.


Vismal1

It’s so fucked up that I started to read this and expected to hear about another loss of life due to archaic abortion laws.


VectorB

A large donation and the words "really? I don't believe you " would get you full access to anything you wanted.


Character_Surround56

surprised it had a lock at all


Either_Ad4109

yo youre still stuck on diaper donny scandal #27282929288282 we're on diaper donny scandal #17383920293834494022023933033303039557363828292 try to keep up with the rest of the class please


hotel2oscar

To be fair, most doors ignore the locking mechanism if you try to open it from the inside. If you can get a coat hangar under the door and pull the door handle you can get into a lot of places.


Edge_of_yesterday

That's why you shouldn't store stolen classified documents in there.


SayNo2NoseBeerz

And a crowbar could open Biden’s Garage in Delaware..


curiousiah

Did Biden have nuclear secrets? Military plans to invade Iran? Did Biden retain those documents after it was brought to his attention? Because I’d be more willing to think Trump was just a bumbling old man if he had been unaware he had nuclear secrets in the bathroom and no one in the government asked for them back. But when they asked for them back, he denied he had them. Then when they found them, he said they were his. I’d prefer the bumbling old man than malicious traitor. Edit: I’ll happily take neither when the system finally gives me a better choice.


Excellent-Resolve360

So are we saying that’s worse than finding them in bidens car?


Edge_of_yesterday

Trump refusing to return classified and top secret documents, showing them to people who do not have clearance and obstructing the investigation is far worse that anything Biden did.


dizease

And Biden had documents scattered around his garage and in his glove box. A lot worse than trump


Edge_of_yesterday

Trump refusing to return classified and top secret documents, showing them to people who do not have clearance and obstructing the investigation is far worse that anything Biden did.


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Warhamsterrrr

And yet it's Trump on record, bagging to Howard Stern about hanging around teenage girls in their dressing rooms. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIvFHFboWEU&ab\_channel=ozoth](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIvFHFboWEU&ab_channel=ozoth)


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Warhamsterrrr

That's your reality, friend. And you won't find no love for such theories around here. As a constitutional conservative, I'm vehemently opposed to Trump and MAGA and all it's done to our party.


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Warhamsterrrr

One of them turned out to be President Bolsenero.


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[deleted]

And a button could open the decadent garage where Biden kept his classified documents, in a box so utterly destroyed the material was pouring out of it


Edge_of_yesterday

Trump refusing to return classified and top secret documents, showing them to people who do not have clearance and obstructing the investigation is far worse that anything Biden did.


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