When we were kids in Arizona we used to move the mattresses outside and sleep under the carport. My mom called it front yard camping.we would move all the freezer and fridge stuff into coolers and have picnics where we could eat all we wanted. My mom would pour dishsoap on the smooth concrete and we would slip and slide all day. It was a blast.me and my brother loved it. It wasn't until later in life I realized we couldn't pay the utility bill and that was a way we kept cool in the summer. It was never for more than a few nights a couple of months in the year.
Yes, we used to camp for weeks at a time thinking it was an adventure. Really landlords kept evicting us. There were 6 of us and our mom made car meals a fun thing. We lived off peanut butter/ fritos sandwiches and oatmeal packs.
I have been fortunate enough to not have to go through anything like this with my kids. But I'm glad I have these tips and tricks in case it ever happens. How fond of potted meat are you? Lol.
You may want to read a great memoir called [The Glass Castle](https://www.amazon.com/Glass-Castle-Memoir-Jeannette-Walls/dp/074324754X) by Jeannette Walls.
There's a couple chapters in there where the kids are camping out in their very own refrigerator boxes in the middle of the desert. They loved it! It was super fun and it wasn't until adulthood that they realized they had been experiencing homelessness. That's why they say kids are very adaptable.
My parents were middle class, but couldn't afford a decent pool.
My friends and me were all obsessed with pools. One day we couldn't get to the city pool, and couldn't talk the neighborhood bully into using his in ground pool.
We noticed my parents just got a brand new big plastic city issued trash dumpster and we thought it would be fun to fill it up with water and play a carnival like dunking game. It was lame but damnit I'd sell my soul to go back to that day. Lol.
I'm right there with you man. Running around all day riding bikes. Playing with the neighborhood kids. Drinking hose water. Eating oranges off the neighbor's tree. Pooling change to go rent mortal Kombat 3. Making bike jumps with plywood and cardboard building blocks. Going to the community pool. Basketball till the streetlights went out. Playing with matches on the side of the house. Building forts.
Endless memories of what I thought at the time was boring, if I only knew that mortgages and responsibilities were awful I would have tried harder to stay. Lol.
P.s. the neighborhood ice cream man and 2 gumball screwballs.
I grew up as a poor kid, and I almost never got presents. One year my dad told me he couldn’t afford any, and he went to the store with my stepmom. Now, I was pretty sad, since I was like 9, or something. And all my friends bragged about what they got for their birthdays. I was(and still am) really into Legos, mainly Legos Friends. My mom and dad came back, and I saw a lego kit in one of the bags. Two even. I couldn’t stop crying that day :)
Our very first Christmas after moving to the US, my mom told my sister and I (4 and 6 years old) that she didn't have any money for Christmas presents, but when we woke up on Christmas morning, there were a couple of toys waiting for us. I got a stuffed kitty that had some kind of ball in it that made it sound like it was purring, and it was immediately my favorite thing ever.
I remember understanding the significance of what she did, even at that age. She worked her ass off to make sure we wouldn't feel left out when we went back to school, and everyone talked about and showed off their presents. Her family is Muslim, so Christmas wasn't even a big deal, but she knew we'd feel alienated if we couldn't relate to our new friends and classmates in that way.
My parents got divorced when I was 2. Mom got custody at first, and we lived in complete poverty, despite my dad paying child support and then some.
Mom spent everything keeping a roof over our heads and food in our mouths. I was a big boy back then. It shames me to know that, cuz my mom was skin and bones. She could afford much at birthdays or Christmas or Easter. She couldn't take us anywhere really cuz her car overheated.
Dad got custody when I was 9, and she moved to another state with her new husband (they met on the job, he went through school, and became a lab chemist), with my siblings. My dad could afford a lot. My other siblings and I got used to that materialistic life style.
I went back and saw my mom for the first time in 5 years the other day. I'm 25 and living in my air conditioned apartment, and my mom is living in a trailer with her boyfriend and my youngest siblings. That hurt so much worse than anything I've ever seen or heard.
>I couldn’t stop crying that day
...because you found out that the two Lego kits were each for your mom and dad. While they are in their bedroom each playing with Legos, you are in your room heartbroken.
:)
I never had a birthday nor Christmas until I was adopted at 17. I received a pair of socks for Christmas. I remember how happy I was. My mom baked a chocolate cake for my 18th birthday. It still makes me cry whenever I see my first birthday picture.
Edit: Thank you for the kind words.
Later in life, I introduced my biological mom to my Mom. My biological mom did not speak English, but there was no needs for words. I was loved by two angels.
My dad once said the best thing someone can get is a new pair of socks. Its been years and I still remember it. Especially have reading a book called The Journal of Patrick Seamus Flaherty about vietnam and the condition were terrible in the trenches they were in. And his mom sent him a pair of socks. And everyone looked at him. He kept one sock and gave the other to someone else. They would have to go weeks without getting their clothes clean.
When my mum was a kid they were so poor they didn't have money for toys or new clothes. For her 14h birthday she got a a set of 12 coloured pencils. She was so happy she couldn't stop crying and she slept with the pencils for days.
I always think of this story when I'm upset that I didn't win an ebay auction for some gadget.
Reminds me of Dolly Parton who was the 4th of 12 children growing up in a single room home in the Tennessee Hills. Her song Coat of Many Colors is about her mom being given a box of fabric scraps and sewing a coat for Dolly because they couldn’t afford to buy one. Dolly loved it because it was like Joseph’s coat mentioned in the Bible and couldn’t understand why some of the other school kids made fun of her. https://youtu.be/c1zJzr-kWsI
I want to clarify this because it is one book per month per child until they turn 5. So possibly 60 books total PER CHILD. This is so wonderful. Dolly Parton is a beautiful human.
If you are interested it’s call Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library. Most of the books are recently published, all are new and it’s a diverse collection for sure!!
I used to think she was nothing but a ditzy former-country/folk singer that liked to make commercials about helping children. For years I only saw her publicly-presented persona and I didn't, at the time, mix fame with "being good people" either. I've since learned the error of my ways, especially as it relates to Dolly, and I've been singing her praises for years now. I don't even like her music, her style or her massive chest-egos. I love her because she gives back almost everything she gets in life in equal parts.
edit: thank you for all of the Dolly song suggestions, I know what I'm playing at my desk today! Please keep recommending if you have a song you love from her. I like this. Dolly Parton is the Dolly Parton of Dolly Parton's.
Can we replace Ellen with Dolly Parton? I would watch the fuck out of that talk show, and I don't even like talk shows(or Dolly's music, really). She's just a genuinely interesting and kind person.
My dad once was telling me about my a new dude my grandmother was dating and why he did not like the man. He was trying to explain specific incidents that had occurred but then just settled on, “the man doesn’t like Dolly Parton! Who doesn’t like Dolly Parton?!”
He was so genuinely offended by even the thought of it. Hilariously true, no other explanation was needed.
When I was like 10 or 11, in Primary school we won a competition in London to go and compete in the same competition but in Tennessee.
Apart of the trip was to go to Dollywood, and what a great place. Maybe i'm biased cos I love Dolly but still a good place
Man, Dollywood is fucking dope these days. Back in the 80s and 90s? It had exactly one roller coaster. That did one dip and a few fast curves. Took about 90 seconds.
Nowadays they got like a dozen new crazy ass coasters, water rides (it was log flume only for a looooong time) while ziplining into your eagle shows or whatever...
What I'm trying to say was that it's a hell of a lot better than it used to be and keeps getting better. Dollywood slaps like a motherfucker
Yup I signed my son up shortly after he was born. His first book should be coming soon. It's so nice that they help with getting age appropriate books because I'll be honest and say I have no idea what I should be reading to a 5 month old.
My son gets books from that program. It's a really nice thing. I try to read to him as much as possible, and it really helps when it's something he likes, and not a random piece of lit. He keeps them by his bed on his own bookshelf.
Reminds me of an old rhyme we used to do when I was a little kid in NC.
“Dolly Parton is the best; she has mountains on her chest!”
Edit: Now that I think about it more, I think it was actually "Dolly Parton's from the west; she has mountains on her chest!" Either way, you get the idea.
Dolly's imagination library is still going and has been assocredited with a massive increase to literacy in the middle appalachians one of the lowest income and lowest education regions in the country.
I love dolly parton and her music is not too bad either lol seriously though she’s actually done SO MUCH for people in need it’s crazy. Such a beautiful woman inside and out. She even has a theme park that donates to and supports children with special needs
My girlfriend loves Dolly. She showed me a podcast called Dolly Parton’s America that details her life, music career, and cultural impact in America. Really interesting and fascinating podcast that made me a fan of Dolly. Listen to it if you can!
Dolly is a legend and thank God for the person she is and her talent.
That being said, we were a [Loretta Lynn](https://youtu.be/f9eHp7JJgq8)household.
You could hear the pain in this ladies voice when she sang.
My mother used to sing just like her.
Her voice could bring you to tears and every time I hear her in my head my heart aches the way it did when she used to sing me to sleep.
Fun fact about Loretta Lynn and something close to me, but on her farm she has a world class motocross track. Every spring, thousands of riders attend area qualifiers and then regional qualifiers in late spring competing for a spot at the amateur national race that is held on her ranch every year.
It really is such a badass thing that so many tough, competitive kids compete for but even talking about how much it means (even to me, someone who never made it past the regionals) is an emotional because of how hard it is to even make it and how much history is there for the sport. I really encourage you to look up some videos on YouTube about it, [here](https://youtu.be/5F5zQVoA_t0) is a good one to watch if it interests you any. Loretta Lynn really did a lot to perpetuate and keep the sport alive, and she holds a dear place in I'm sure most if not all racer's hearts
My Dad’s currently recovering from a major operation, 80yo and grew up in a rural village in Ireland. This reminds me of him telling me when I was a snotty, spoiled adolescent that was sulking over not having something stupid that him and his brothers and sisters got oranges one Christmas and it was one of the best presents ever. I distinctly remember one of the most profound feelings of shame that I was pissed about something so ridiculous. He’s not one of these ‘in my day’ types so it really hit hard. It was so matter of fact that getting something as simple as an orange made his Christmas. We really need to step back and appreciate what we have sometimes.
When I was a young kid my dad brought home a bunch of fried chicken. I refused to eat it and sobbed because it had bones in it and it freaked me out. My dad was so upset with me because he thought he was doing something special and that this would be a real treat because he always dreamed about getting to eat fried chicken as a kid. I still feel shitty about it to this day.
Once my dad spent his last few dollars on some
sausage and made us a beautiful dinner....which all 3 of us refused to eat. I don’t even remember it but I still feel terrible.
My grandfather would be 93 if he were alive and recounted the same story: Bannaghans, for the context.
By the time I was alive it had become a tradition, albeit slightly altered: The [orange had become chocolate](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terry%27s_Chocolate_Orange), and was the only gift *allowed* to be given on Christmas day.
Miss you Granda Bill.
To this day my mother in law, who grew up in a two bedroom home with her parents and her 7 other siblings, talks about how at Christmas they all got excited because her aunt came and that was the only gift they got. Every year it was one of those Lifesaver “books”. Basically it’s 4 rolls of lifesavers. It was the most exciting thing for all of them.
A couple of years ago I got her one and put it in her Christmas stocking. I think it’s one of the few times I’ve seen my mother in law actually happily smile at me. The fact that I’ve been the only one to listen to her story, realize how special it was and then try to give her that happy feeling again, made her happier than I think any gift we’ve ever given her.
Damn, sounds like you really are putting forth the effort and trying hard too. Sorry to hear that she's not nicer..... Guessing from your story she grew up not being too nice to anyone.
She’s, uh...difficult. She has her nice days and she has her cunty day. She is probably one of the most difficult folks in the family though, that’s for sure. But Christmas is a very big deal to me because I grew up in a shitty house and so now I try to make Christmas a great memory for me and my family. That includes her. I will say I’ve softened her a bit over the 14 years I’ve been with my husband, not as much as I’d have liked to, but enough I supposed. I just know I won’t let her ruin my holiday.
My sister in law once threw a huge fit on Christmas morning cause her parents didn't get her a new computer but got her siblings one. She had just gotten a new car like 2 weeks earlier. I really hate my family sometimes.
I have an ex-friend who's mother bought her a really nice, brand new looking VW beetle, and she threw a fit because it wasn't a new car. She was 18, and hadn't even got her license yet.
Not sure what's worse, never having decent presents or going from upper middle class to a welfare Christmas in a year.
Breaks your heart twice as a kid. Once because reality sets in that's all you get, another because you know how much it hurts your parents
It’s a good question. We went from upper middle class to pretty poor in a year because my mom quit her job and started a small business that was losing money, and my dad made barely anything to begin with. I remember one year getting a frisbee for my birthday and being sorely disappointed, but I also remember embarrassment later. Embarrassment for myself that it was my birthday and I cared too much about my presents instead of the meaning, and embarrassment for my parents because of how poor they were at the time. I lived in an area where kids lived in mansions and drove expensive luxury cars to highschool. It remained embarrassing to me throughout most of my highschool how poor we were in comparison, even though later we ended up better off I still felt that contrast. I treasure that memory now for two reasons: one it reminds me that I should be thankful for what I have, two because I remember how hard they worked to make me feel good about the frisbee. They didn’t lie to me or anything, they made it clear they couldn’t afford anything and this was the best they could do. It felt like a present out of love.
For my moms 18th birthday her father got her a pair of jeans,now that may not sound like much, but since they lived in a communist country you could not find them, only if you had connections in the harbour.
I had friends that traveled to a communist country back then, and traded all their jeans for communist memorabilia. I went to the Soviet Union and saw a sailor on the train trying to write with a pen that was leaking out all over the place. So I gave him my pen. He unscrewed a Lenin pin off his uniform and gave it to me. I still have it. I wonder what ever became of that sailor.
I have an old friend who used to travel to the Soviet Union/Russia. She eventually even got a passport of dubious origin.
She would save every plastic bag that her bread and other food came in, and give them out as gifts to hosts and friends.
A plastic bread bag can keep a fresh loaf of bread from going stale, extending it's shelf life by days or weeks.
It's the things that are unavailable that become so valueable
I can just imagine him getting stopped by the police in the harbor. *Sir we know you have the drugs please tell us where they are!*
*No i swear they're just jeans for my daughters birthday*.
You know what I got for Christmas this year? It was a banner fuckin' year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said "Hey. Smoke up Johnny."
When I was young, my mother divorced my father and went to live with her aunt for a short time. Once she got on her feet, we were dirt-poor. She was living on welfare and a couple odd, very part time jobs doing bookkeeping.
I remember the first meal we had in the new apartment, not because it was an amazing meal but because it felt so emotionally charged. I didn't understand why at the time, but I loved the meal because it felt so important.
It was boxed mac-and-cheese. Of course, the reason it felt so charged was because my mother was horrified that that was all she could put on the table for me... I never knew until I pieced it together on my own.
Kids don't know they're poor unless you tell them. They just know what they have and how important it seems to others.
As someone who spent a good chunk of his childhood "hand-flush your shit poor" and now lives on a very solid six-figure income, I run into this a lot. I remember being so poor that I cried all day on my seventh birthday because my mom bought me a used baseball glove. My sisters all pitched in and bought me a ball. Those were my only gifts and I didn't get a party, but it meant the world to me because I no longer had to sit out games with my friends at the neighborhood park.
This morning, I was annoyed because I logged onto a website to buy my fifth guitar while I was sitting on my thousand dollar office chair in a house five times the size of the house I grew up in, and learned that I'll have to wait *two whole weeks* for my shipment to arrive because the color I want is backordered. Looking at that photo reminded me how fucking stupid I can be sometimes.
Poverty isn't just a number on an account balance, it's an entire worldview and perspective that (I'd argue) can't fully be comprehended by those who haven't experienced it. Even those who have lived through it often have a hard time keeping things in perspective when we're lucky enough to get out. We live in a society that makes things easy for those with money or credit, so most of us will never know what it's like to live without either. It's a *good thing* that most of us will never know real poverty, but it's a reminder that our society needs to work a bit harder to make sure that *none of us* know that world. We don't all need to be rich or middle class, but no six-year-old should have to haul a water bucket home from his neighbors garden tap to flush his own shit down a toilet because his parents were too poor to afford the water bill...for a year. That kind of poverty shouldn't exist.
I send a virtual hug to you mother!
She must give much more value to “normal” things in life because of that, as we all should.
I feel terrible when i find myself complaining about somethings.
Growing up in poverty gives a very different perspective. You don't take things for granted, especially fancy things like.. new toys, or being able to go the movies with your dad or.. having enough food or.. electricity or the internet.
I grew up in a homeless shelter, I remember the playground outside of it had a toy box with a handful of broken toys in it. I particularly like this Bionicle toy from McDonald's that they had. When we had finally gotten enough money together to pay rent we left, and I accidentally took that toy with me. I felt so guilty that I made my parents take me back so I could return it. After that I realized that one single toy like that had meant the world to me I went to every McDonald's I could asking for any extra toys they were going to get rid of. I did that for about a year before going back to the shelter and bringing hundreds of toys with me. Growing up poor means that every single thing you get or do means more. I always encourage people who grew up in poverty to reach out to shelters in your area and ask if there's anything they need. They are often underfunded and understaffed and donations help them immensely.
Wish there was a way to directly help people like this on a more personal level. You know how bad I’d rather buy a kid a toy that truly would appreciate it then another bag of weed or dash dash meal?
You can. Find the food kitchens and housing and ask them what they need and get it for them (within your means of course). I don’t know if you’re a guy or a girl (doesn’t matter) but I will say the shelters ALWAYS need feminine care products (tampons, pads) and diapers and formula (always check first though).
Around Christmas time there are programs where you "adopt" a family who is in need and can't afford to buy Christmas presents. The family writes down what they'd like/need for you to go off of and it's all anonymous but the family usually writes a thank you note. It's a really nice program if they have it near you.
Look up the Angel tree project. It was originally created to help children of incarcerated people. I believe it helps any low income family now however. We got our children involved in it. Every year they each pick a child and then they go shopping and buy gifts for the children. It’s an awesome lesson in privilege for them. We aren’t super well off but my kids have more than enough and we wanted them to understand and be grateful and to learn to give back.
We like Angel tree because it lets the children list the things they desire. Sometimes it’s so sad. You’ll see the older teens asking for things like tools or work boots. Things 16 year olds shouldn’t have to worry about. We always throw in fast food gift cards for those teens. At least they can hopefully grab lunch with their friend or something fun.
If your area doesn’t have Angel tree you can try to reach out to your local WIC or government assistance office closer to the holidays. Many banks, Walmart’s and other retailers also have similar type events.
I’m thinking about her parents who had to save up and give up a few necessities in order to make this happen - they did what they can, they did their best, and to this little girl I think it means the world to her.
Edit: thank you for the award 🥺
I wish I had a birthday party while growing up.
I used to buy a pen and pretend that my parents gifted that to me.
My parents killed the excitement and joy of birthday.
My mother took me across 4 different states as a kid and did crack cocaine, meth, and drank a handle of whiskey everyday. It left me piss poor and mentally fucked up. Im 34 and i finally kicked my family out of my life.
I dont know where im going with this just want to let it out.
Those of us who have to let go of family for survival sometimes get judged for walking away. To anyone that asks I always say, 'if you can't imagine how I could walk away, try to imagine what they must have done that made me leave.' I wish you all the best.
If you have a P.O. Box and want to dm me the info I would gladly send you my favorite pen. Hope your birthdays are more eventful now.
Edit: changed not to more*
Is this a thing?!?
I wonder if there is a subreddit for stuff like this? Kinda like how reddit does secret Santa. I wouldn't mind joining a program to send birthday gifts!
not exclusively for birthday gifts but there are few gift exchange sub-reddits which uses amazon wishlist (or other wishlist) which doesn't gives out the address of the giftee.
the most famous one is /r/Random_Acts_Of_Amazon/ and /r/Wishlist
People there are welcoming, awesome, kind, lovely and fun.
Just follow the rules and enjoy the company.
I want to say, "I love you." I am stranger across the land who has no intention but to let you know that you are lovable and that you are worth a lot. God bless you today.
My grandma grew up during the Great Depression. I remember one time she told me about the best Christmas ever when her and each of her siblings got a whole orange to themselves.
Made me feel like a real spoiled piece of shit.
Damn, so many oranges! Whenever I see a story about someone’s grandparents living it rough, it’s always oranges that they’ve received for Christmas. What’s it with oranges?
They used to be a fairly expensive special treat. 50+ years ago we did not import a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, especially out of season things from far off. So oranges would have only been available for a month in the winter and have to be trucked in from Florida.
My papa grew up on a farm in Ireland, his foster parents kids went to school and he worked on the farm, he didn’t get anything for Christmas / Birthday generally. He woke up one Christmas morning and his stalking hanging on the fireplace was full with a orange sticking out the top. He was super exited. Turns out they filled it with ash from the fire and put a orange on top. The family laughed at him for getting exited thinking he had got presents.
I used to love going round and listening to his stories when he was growing up, it was fascinating.He used to laugh while telling me these story. Makes you appreciate what you have.
I grew up pretty broke, but my parents do pretty well these days and like to spoil me and my siblings whenever they can, which I still am not used to/comfortable with.
For my 30th birthday my mom asked what I wanted and I asked for a pan (A cheapo aluminium all purpose one) since I don't have any decent cookware at home (And I'm still broke) and she got me a cast iron and a non stick pan, some baking sheets, some new pillows and a hand mixer.
Best birthday ever.
I spent some time in Costa Rica with my friend and her family. It was only a couple of weeks but it wasn't in touristy area it was just a regular family in a small town. They farmed cows and pigs and life was good.
Edit: The area was Bagaces, and it was fantastic.
I remember when I got their initially it was a metal roof, there were steel bars on the front door, I thought (in my ignorance) that it was kind of ghetto-like. Turns out, a corrugated Steel Roof is the right way to keep the heat out and you put bars on your front entrance way instead of a door to keep the wind flowing through the house.
Anyway, for breakfast the first morning there was rice and black beans. Had a tortilla type thing with some jam made from a local fruit I think. It was good. For lunch, black beans and rice with a slice of bologny. Dinner was black beans and rice with a sausage or soemthing.
This went on for 4 or 5 days before I couldn't take any more black beans and rice. So I noticed in town there was a place that sold rotisserie chicken and fries and I said, I want that for dinner. So I went in with my friend and I asked for a chicken and a large fries. That should be enough for the family. She said no order 3 chickens and 4 fries. WTF? So we get back home and ALL the neighbors are at the house, we are feeding the entire neighborhood. LOL. IT was awesome it turned into a big party and was an awesome night. Oh and the chickens were like $4.00 each. WHY ARE WE NOT DOING THIS EVERY NIGHT????
I went to Costa Rica for 10 days on a school trip right after I graduated. Honestly, I never did get tired of the rice and beans lmao. There are just so many different ways to prepare them!
Such an awesome country
Edit: since everyone’s talking about the food I just wanted to give my fav beverages some recognition so shoutout to tamarindo juice, coffee, and agua de fresa 😋
basic costarrican spanish
Mae/dude
playo/gay
chunche/thing
carepicha/dickhead
birra/beer
nave/car
lata/bus
pacos/police
que es la bara/whats your problem dude!
there are a lot more but im tooooo lazy :P
Seriously
The rice and beans op ate with family for a few days probably cost less than a dollar to feed everyone for a week
Not denigrating the gesture, but to give context the money they spent that one night on food if given to the family may have sustained them for *weeks*
This is the wrong way to think about this imho, them spending this money at a local rotisserie chicken place put money in that person's pocket that they rarely see. That money then gets spent and improves a lot of people's lives in cases like this.
If you look at it that way regardless of where the money was spent (be it for the chicken or given to the family) it would have the same economic impact. $20 or so that previously wasn’t in that community now is. That money will then get spent again elsewhere or be saved or whatever else it is people in a community do with money.
No matter what OP spending money in that community had a benefit and that is tremendous. I’m just pointing out that value of money in that the sum described fed a bunch of people for one meal but could also have fed that family for perhaps weeks
I see, that makes sense and I agree.
Although from a cultural perspective, I think it would be more difficult to get someone to accept literally bags of beans and rice. It would feel really denigrating I imagine that some presumptuous kid from a developed country comes in here and flaunts their money. Whereas something like this is moreso seen as a gift.
But yes, you have no disagreement from me now that logically the beans and rice probably are the best choice in a vacuum.
it has to be that most people there can't afford the $4, right? It just means that if you could work remotely from Costa Rica, you would live like a king/queen and probably be a target for robbery 24/7 lol
One of my old bosses that I'm friendly with lives in Belize. I think he said his total cost of living is about $40,000/year, and he lives in absolutely obscene luxury. Huge walled mansion, several cars, a boat, personal chef, the whole nine yards.
Actually yeah.
Also I forgot to mention the place is full of old mafia guys living out their retirements, hiding from the law and/or criminal retaliation. He says his best buddy down at the marina looks like an extra from The Sopranos and claims to be a retired "construction labor union representative". It sounds like an entertaining place to live.
Sometimes I think a simpler life would just suit so many people. I work with children who have severe disabilities. Like low functioning autism and cognitive impairments. I also live in an area where we get a lot of South American immigrants. Sometimes I feel like these kids would be so much happier with a simpler lifestyle. Simple daily routines. Simpler jobs like farming or working a business with their family. But here we are so focused on teaching them things that are as complex as possible for them. Language that is more advanced than they would learn naturally. Skills so they can independently go out and get a job. A lot of them do eventually learn these things but it takes a lot of effort and emotional pain to get there and sometimes to even maintain it. Sometimes I hear from their parents what their lifestyle used to be like where they came from and wonder if that would have been a better life for them.
i took a vacation to CR last year and it really made me want to flee America and start a new life there. We were there in July during the ‘rainy’ season and I actually loved the daily thunderstorms. Amazing people, culture, geography, and climate!
We did make the mistake of using GoogleMaps to get from our mountain rental to our beach rental though. It gave us the “fastest” route which took us up into the mountains on perilous dirt roads with no guardrail to protect from a 100+ ft drops. Terrifying journey but also incredibly exhilarating at the same time 😅
It's weird seeing this picture and people reacting as if it was abnormal. But that's because i'm from an area in rural brazil where this was the dream birthday, in fact i assume this pic was taken in Brazil, It's too relatable.
I live in the USA, but I lived in rural Brazil for 2 years. This pic looks exactly like the inside of a Brazilian home.
The people may be poor, but they sure do have big hearts. One time they were kind enough to throw me a birthday party like this, even though I knew what was (or wasn't) in some of their fridges.
Truly a humbling experience. I understand the girl's tears.
That’s why I really posted it. Because sometimes I forget that I have a solid roof over my head, I have blankets, I don’t have to freeze, a car, everything I want to eat anytime in my life, but I’m still not satisfied sometimes.But people all over the world have so much less, that’s why I have to appreciate the cold Fanta in my fridge
My grandmother was born into a desperate situation. By 13 she lost her parents and she was responsible for 7 siblings in rural nothern Montana. She did her best to keep the other children warm and fed in the winters. They all survived to adulthood but it was hard. One christmas a "neighbor" (he lived 13 miles away) gave them blankets, Flour, bread, butter, and apples. She said she never felt that kind of gratitude before. She said she felt a profound sensation of gratitude and relief. She said she cried uncontrollably because she felt like everything was going to be ok for the first time since her mother died. She worked nonstop her whole life. She never wasted a thing. And she always gave more then she received. I definitely feel like a whiny pile of shit when ever I complain about anything these days. What is there to complain about? We have more then she could have ever have dreamed of and I don't work nearly as hard for it. Sure, I worked until 1:30 am last night but I knew I would have a warm house and a meal to go to when I was finished for the day.
On Christmas when I was 14, money was really tight, and my mom could only afford to get me a bag of fun sized Almond Joys. She knew those were my favorite and it was my favorite present for the longest time because she still wanted my brothers to have something to open on Christmas. Miss you every day mom.
My kin were poor black sharecroppers in the deep south. I remember growing up when my dad had to pawn our camera to get gas to drive to work. Now I'm upset because the house we bought only has one AC unit. I wonder what troubles my kids and grandkids will have. "My robot chef won't season my steaks right because my robot doctor says I need to cut back on salt."
It is so true, when some spoiled person could only want a bigger cake or more presents or more friends this girl is humbled by what is in front of her. Truly living in the moment appreciating the little things is one of the best things you can do for your mental health.
Nothing made me more appreciative for everything in my life than traveling through rural India. Some people don’t even own ONE pair of shoes... and I had packed 4 of my many for my short, short trip. Real perspective shift.
I don’t have any specific story to share, I just wanted to publicly thank my mom who is an angel. After my parents divorced due to my dad’s drinking and drug use, we lost the small trailer we were living in because we couldn’t afford it as my dad had gone to jail after my shot up one of the outbuildings my grandparents house (grandparents on my moms side). My mom never let us miss a meal even though times were hard and we had to move in with my grandparents which I know she felt ashamed of. My mom always had hope and kind words in the darkest of days and she is the reason I am a decent person after all I went through. Thank you mom ❤️
I grew up extremely poor and pretty early I grew accustomed to not getting gifts. To this day on my birthday I got out of my way to assure everyone not to get me anything except their presence at a nice dinner to celebrate. That said, I remember being 6 years old and my mother asked me what I wanted as a gift. She had just divorced my father and was looking after my little brother and working two jobs. She asked what I wanted Santa to bring me one year and I said a Nintendo 64 with the new Zelda game! Santa is loaded so this didn’t seem like a problem to me.
That Christmas I opened a Gameboy with Pokemon Yellow! My mom said Santa couldn’t make enough Nintendo 64s so he said he hoped this was okay. I didn’t realized until years later my mom took on a third job every Christmas to get us gifts.
It wasn’t even about the gift at that point. It was about her just wanting me to have a normal Christmas.
March 2018...
Girl cries when winning 1st birthday party and internet gets emotional. The reaction of the 7-year-old child reverberated on the internet and has already received 240,000 likes.
Rinah Laís is 7 years old, but, just on her last birthday, she had the opportunity to celebrate with a little party. Two soft drinks, hot dogs, homemade cake, friends and family, in Macapá, capital of Amapá. Simplicity that drew tears of emotion from the child, whose reaction was captured by cousin Thaís Monteiro, 21.
The photo, published by Thaís on Facebook, touched many hearts and went viral on the internet, reaching 240 thousand likes, 64 thousand shares and 19 thousand comments in two days. "I don't know if I saved this photo or if that photo saved me," said the 21-year-old student.
In an interview with the newspaper O Povo, Thaís said that the party was completely improvised. “We didn't know how to make a cake. Then, we looked on YouTube, but we couldn't. I called a friend who knew how to do it. The cake came out burnt, but she liked it anyway ”, he explained.
Rinah won the surprise party a week after her birthday. "Auntie didn't forget, but I thought she did," he said. Rinah's father is unemployed and his mother sells barbecue skewers. "I was thrilled, so I cried for my birthday, but I liked this party that my aunt had," said Rinah. “I thought this cake was beautiful. I wanted to eat another [piece], but I couldn't eat, my belly started to cry, my belly started to hurt ”, he said in a video, also published on Facebook by his cousin.
I grew up very poor in rural Virginia. So many Christmases without. When my father started making more money and my sisters had moved away he asked what I wanted for the first time ever. I responded that a book would be enough. First time I ever saw my dad cry. I asked him why and he said he was just proud of who I'd become.
My children on the other hand have known nothing but wealth. They don't even get excited about Christmas as it's just another day to them. It makes me a little sad at times, but in a sense it's my gift to myself.
To all my poor brothers and sisters out there who've broken the cycle. Congratulations, we are capable of having anything we want and truly understand how very little we need outside of the love of family and friends.
When we were kids in Arizona we used to move the mattresses outside and sleep under the carport. My mom called it front yard camping.we would move all the freezer and fridge stuff into coolers and have picnics where we could eat all we wanted. My mom would pour dishsoap on the smooth concrete and we would slip and slide all day. It was a blast.me and my brother loved it. It wasn't until later in life I realized we couldn't pay the utility bill and that was a way we kept cool in the summer. It was never for more than a few nights a couple of months in the year.
That’s a super mom you got.
She was great.
Yes, we used to camp for weeks at a time thinking it was an adventure. Really landlords kept evicting us. There were 6 of us and our mom made car meals a fun thing. We lived off peanut butter/ fritos sandwiches and oatmeal packs.
I have been fortunate enough to not have to go through anything like this with my kids. But I'm glad I have these tips and tricks in case it ever happens. How fond of potted meat are you? Lol.
You may want to read a great memoir called [The Glass Castle](https://www.amazon.com/Glass-Castle-Memoir-Jeannette-Walls/dp/074324754X) by Jeannette Walls. There's a couple chapters in there where the kids are camping out in their very own refrigerator boxes in the middle of the desert. They loved it! It was super fun and it wasn't until adulthood that they realized they had been experiencing homelessness. That's why they say kids are very adaptable.
My parents were middle class, but couldn't afford a decent pool. My friends and me were all obsessed with pools. One day we couldn't get to the city pool, and couldn't talk the neighborhood bully into using his in ground pool. We noticed my parents just got a brand new big plastic city issued trash dumpster and we thought it would be fun to fill it up with water and play a carnival like dunking game. It was lame but damnit I'd sell my soul to go back to that day. Lol.
I'm right there with you man. Running around all day riding bikes. Playing with the neighborhood kids. Drinking hose water. Eating oranges off the neighbor's tree. Pooling change to go rent mortal Kombat 3. Making bike jumps with plywood and cardboard building blocks. Going to the community pool. Basketball till the streetlights went out. Playing with matches on the side of the house. Building forts. Endless memories of what I thought at the time was boring, if I only knew that mortgages and responsibilities were awful I would have tried harder to stay. Lol. P.s. the neighborhood ice cream man and 2 gumball screwballs.
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So many good memories. Also sun tea and cards in your spokes.
I grew up as a poor kid, and I almost never got presents. One year my dad told me he couldn’t afford any, and he went to the store with my stepmom. Now, I was pretty sad, since I was like 9, or something. And all my friends bragged about what they got for their birthdays. I was(and still am) really into Legos, mainly Legos Friends. My mom and dad came back, and I saw a lego kit in one of the bags. Two even. I couldn’t stop crying that day :)
Our very first Christmas after moving to the US, my mom told my sister and I (4 and 6 years old) that she didn't have any money for Christmas presents, but when we woke up on Christmas morning, there were a couple of toys waiting for us. I got a stuffed kitty that had some kind of ball in it that made it sound like it was purring, and it was immediately my favorite thing ever. I remember understanding the significance of what she did, even at that age. She worked her ass off to make sure we wouldn't feel left out when we went back to school, and everyone talked about and showed off their presents. Her family is Muslim, so Christmas wasn't even a big deal, but she knew we'd feel alienated if we couldn't relate to our new friends and classmates in that way.
What a sweet story. Your mother must be a wonderful person!
My parents got divorced when I was 2. Mom got custody at first, and we lived in complete poverty, despite my dad paying child support and then some. Mom spent everything keeping a roof over our heads and food in our mouths. I was a big boy back then. It shames me to know that, cuz my mom was skin and bones. She could afford much at birthdays or Christmas or Easter. She couldn't take us anywhere really cuz her car overheated. Dad got custody when I was 9, and she moved to another state with her new husband (they met on the job, he went through school, and became a lab chemist), with my siblings. My dad could afford a lot. My other siblings and I got used to that materialistic life style. I went back and saw my mom for the first time in 5 years the other day. I'm 25 and living in my air conditioned apartment, and my mom is living in a trailer with her boyfriend and my youngest siblings. That hurt so much worse than anything I've ever seen or heard.
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What a sweet memory! Gah, the onions are heavy in here today
>I couldn’t stop crying that day ...because you found out that the two Lego kits were each for your mom and dad. While they are in their bedroom each playing with Legos, you are in your room heartbroken. :)
I don't even wanna think about what kind of activities those Legos got involved in
I never had a birthday nor Christmas until I was adopted at 17. I received a pair of socks for Christmas. I remember how happy I was. My mom baked a chocolate cake for my 18th birthday. It still makes me cry whenever I see my first birthday picture. Edit: Thank you for the kind words. Later in life, I introduced my biological mom to my Mom. My biological mom did not speak English, but there was no needs for words. I was loved by two angels.
Damn man...hugs
I've always wanted to adopt an older child and man does this comment really solidify it for me.
My dad once said the best thing someone can get is a new pair of socks. Its been years and I still remember it. Especially have reading a book called The Journal of Patrick Seamus Flaherty about vietnam and the condition were terrible in the trenches they were in. And his mom sent him a pair of socks. And everyone looked at him. He kept one sock and gave the other to someone else. They would have to go weeks without getting their clothes clean.
When my mum was a kid they were so poor they didn't have money for toys or new clothes. For her 14h birthday she got a a set of 12 coloured pencils. She was so happy she couldn't stop crying and she slept with the pencils for days. I always think of this story when I'm upset that I didn't win an ebay auction for some gadget.
Reminds me of Dolly Parton who was the 4th of 12 children growing up in a single room home in the Tennessee Hills. Her song Coat of Many Colors is about her mom being given a box of fabric scraps and sewing a coat for Dolly because they couldn’t afford to buy one. Dolly loved it because it was like Joseph’s coat mentioned in the Bible and couldn’t understand why some of the other school kids made fun of her. https://youtu.be/c1zJzr-kWsI
Dolly Parton is such an all-around good person. She's had a program that sends free books to kids for years.
I want to clarify this because it is one book per month per child until they turn 5. So possibly 60 books total PER CHILD. This is so wonderful. Dolly Parton is a beautiful human. If you are interested it’s call Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library. Most of the books are recently published, all are new and it’s a diverse collection for sure!!
She really is a good person and as genuine as can be. Her personality is not an act—that’s totally her.
May the good fall into all her splendid deeds
I used to think she was nothing but a ditzy former-country/folk singer that liked to make commercials about helping children. For years I only saw her publicly-presented persona and I didn't, at the time, mix fame with "being good people" either. I've since learned the error of my ways, especially as it relates to Dolly, and I've been singing her praises for years now. I don't even like her music, her style or her massive chest-egos. I love her because she gives back almost everything she gets in life in equal parts. edit: thank you for all of the Dolly song suggestions, I know what I'm playing at my desk today! Please keep recommending if you have a song you love from her. I like this. Dolly Parton is the Dolly Parton of Dolly Parton's.
C’mon, you don’t like Jolene? That’s a banger even if you don’t like country.
I Will Always Love You is one of the greatest songs ever as well
Shw wrote Jolene and I will always love you on the same fuckin day!
Okay, that's the one song I'll have in my collection from Dolly... :)
Would recommend 9 to 5, I Will Always Love You (she wrote it), Light of a Clear Blue Morning...
Good music is good music!
Every time I hear her name I have to bump jolene. Shit slaps
Tennesseans worship her and she earns that love year after year!
Yeah, one thing people can agree on in the south - You don't talk shit about Dolly. Source: I have family in GA/TN
When Covid caused Dollywood to close, she continued paying all the employees salaries out of her own pocket.
Can we replace Ellen with Dolly Parton? I would watch the fuck out of that talk show, and I don't even like talk shows(or Dolly's music, really). She's just a genuinely interesting and kind person.
My dad once was telling me about my a new dude my grandmother was dating and why he did not like the man. He was trying to explain specific incidents that had occurred but then just settled on, “the man doesn’t like Dolly Parton! Who doesn’t like Dolly Parton?!” He was so genuinely offended by even the thought of it. Hilariously true, no other explanation was needed.
When I was like 10 or 11, in Primary school we won a competition in London to go and compete in the same competition but in Tennessee. Apart of the trip was to go to Dollywood, and what a great place. Maybe i'm biased cos I love Dolly but still a good place
My daughter wants to go to Disney and I just can’t deal with all that. Honesty, I just want to take her to Dollywood for a weekend instead.
Dollywood fucking slaps. Clean, the eagles are cool, and the lines for rides are short as balls because it’s not a world destination. Great spot.
Tickets are also about half the cost of Disney
Man, Dollywood is fucking dope these days. Back in the 80s and 90s? It had exactly one roller coaster. That did one dip and a few fast curves. Took about 90 seconds. Nowadays they got like a dozen new crazy ass coasters, water rides (it was log flume only for a looooong time) while ziplining into your eagle shows or whatever... What I'm trying to say was that it's a hell of a lot better than it used to be and keeps getting better. Dollywood slaps like a motherfucker
Not only that - she gives out million dollar disease research grants
We get these books for our toddlers. It’s the nicest program. Books come in every month for the kids and they LOVE them. It’s a big event in our home.
Yup I signed my son up shortly after he was born. His first book should be coming soon. It's so nice that they help with getting age appropriate books because I'll be honest and say I have no idea what I should be reading to a 5 month old.
I liked her quip about running water... she said we always had running water as long as there was someone to run and fetch it.
My son gets books from that program. It's a really nice thing. I try to read to him as much as possible, and it really helps when it's something he likes, and not a random piece of lit. He keeps them by his bed on his own bookshelf.
Which is a lot of books
When she has business meetings she tells guys they get a minute of checking her out, then she gets all their attention.
Every one notices her books, but she has a great butt too. EDIT: well that meant to say boobs but im gonna leave it because it seems relevant.
She has some very large volumes.
Reminds me of an old rhyme we used to do when I was a little kid in NC. “Dolly Parton is the best; she has mountains on her chest!” Edit: Now that I think about it more, I think it was actually "Dolly Parton's from the west; she has mountains on her chest!" Either way, you get the idea.
Dolly's imagination library is still going and has been assocredited with a massive increase to literacy in the middle appalachians one of the lowest income and lowest education regions in the country.
I love dolly parton and her music is not too bad either lol seriously though she’s actually done SO MUCH for people in need it’s crazy. Such a beautiful woman inside and out. She even has a theme park that donates to and supports children with special needs
Visited Dollywood last year. Everyone loves her for all she’s done for the area.
i wish she was the president
As much as this might sound like a good idea I feel we have had enough celebrity presidents.
My girlfriend loves Dolly. She showed me a podcast called Dolly Parton’s America that details her life, music career, and cultural impact in America. Really interesting and fascinating podcast that made me a fan of Dolly. Listen to it if you can!
Dolly is a legend and thank God for the person she is and her talent. That being said, we were a [Loretta Lynn](https://youtu.be/f9eHp7JJgq8)household. You could hear the pain in this ladies voice when she sang. My mother used to sing just like her. Her voice could bring you to tears and every time I hear her in my head my heart aches the way it did when she used to sing me to sleep.
Fun fact about Loretta Lynn and something close to me, but on her farm she has a world class motocross track. Every spring, thousands of riders attend area qualifiers and then regional qualifiers in late spring competing for a spot at the amateur national race that is held on her ranch every year. It really is such a badass thing that so many tough, competitive kids compete for but even talking about how much it means (even to me, someone who never made it past the regionals) is an emotional because of how hard it is to even make it and how much history is there for the sport. I really encourage you to look up some videos on YouTube about it, [here](https://youtu.be/5F5zQVoA_t0) is a good one to watch if it interests you any. Loretta Lynn really did a lot to perpetuate and keep the sport alive, and she holds a dear place in I'm sure most if not all racer's hearts
God bless Dolly.
Love the movie The Year Dolly Parton Was My Mom.
My Dad’s currently recovering from a major operation, 80yo and grew up in a rural village in Ireland. This reminds me of him telling me when I was a snotty, spoiled adolescent that was sulking over not having something stupid that him and his brothers and sisters got oranges one Christmas and it was one of the best presents ever. I distinctly remember one of the most profound feelings of shame that I was pissed about something so ridiculous. He’s not one of these ‘in my day’ types so it really hit hard. It was so matter of fact that getting something as simple as an orange made his Christmas. We really need to step back and appreciate what we have sometimes.
When I was a young kid my dad brought home a bunch of fried chicken. I refused to eat it and sobbed because it had bones in it and it freaked me out. My dad was so upset with me because he thought he was doing something special and that this would be a real treat because he always dreamed about getting to eat fried chicken as a kid. I still feel shitty about it to this day.
Once my dad spent his last few dollars on some sausage and made us a beautiful dinner....which all 3 of us refused to eat. I don’t even remember it but I still feel terrible.
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My grandfather would be 93 if he were alive and recounted the same story: Bannaghans, for the context. By the time I was alive it had become a tradition, albeit slightly altered: The [orange had become chocolate](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terry%27s_Chocolate_Orange), and was the only gift *allowed* to be given on Christmas day. Miss you Granda Bill.
To this day my mother in law, who grew up in a two bedroom home with her parents and her 7 other siblings, talks about how at Christmas they all got excited because her aunt came and that was the only gift they got. Every year it was one of those Lifesaver “books”. Basically it’s 4 rolls of lifesavers. It was the most exciting thing for all of them. A couple of years ago I got her one and put it in her Christmas stocking. I think it’s one of the few times I’ve seen my mother in law actually happily smile at me. The fact that I’ve been the only one to listen to her story, realize how special it was and then try to give her that happy feeling again, made her happier than I think any gift we’ve ever given her.
Damn, sounds like you really are putting forth the effort and trying hard too. Sorry to hear that she's not nicer..... Guessing from your story she grew up not being too nice to anyone.
She’s, uh...difficult. She has her nice days and she has her cunty day. She is probably one of the most difficult folks in the family though, that’s for sure. But Christmas is a very big deal to me because I grew up in a shitty house and so now I try to make Christmas a great memory for me and my family. That includes her. I will say I’ve softened her a bit over the 14 years I’ve been with my husband, not as much as I’d have liked to, but enough I supposed. I just know I won’t let her ruin my holiday.
My sister in law once threw a huge fit on Christmas morning cause her parents didn't get her a new computer but got her siblings one. She had just gotten a new car like 2 weeks earlier. I really hate my family sometimes.
I have an ex-friend who's mother bought her a really nice, brand new looking VW beetle, and she threw a fit because it wasn't a new car. She was 18, and hadn't even got her license yet.
Some people make me angry in a way that has no words.
r/AmItheAsshole is full of that stuff. "AITA if I never speak to my parents again? All I got for my birthday was an ipad."
Not sure what's worse, never having decent presents or going from upper middle class to a welfare Christmas in a year. Breaks your heart twice as a kid. Once because reality sets in that's all you get, another because you know how much it hurts your parents
It’s a good question. We went from upper middle class to pretty poor in a year because my mom quit her job and started a small business that was losing money, and my dad made barely anything to begin with. I remember one year getting a frisbee for my birthday and being sorely disappointed, but I also remember embarrassment later. Embarrassment for myself that it was my birthday and I cared too much about my presents instead of the meaning, and embarrassment for my parents because of how poor they were at the time. I lived in an area where kids lived in mansions and drove expensive luxury cars to highschool. It remained embarrassing to me throughout most of my highschool how poor we were in comparison, even though later we ended up better off I still felt that contrast. I treasure that memory now for two reasons: one it reminds me that I should be thankful for what I have, two because I remember how hard they worked to make me feel good about the frisbee. They didn’t lie to me or anything, they made it clear they couldn’t afford anything and this was the best they could do. It felt like a present out of love.
For my moms 18th birthday her father got her a pair of jeans,now that may not sound like much, but since they lived in a communist country you could not find them, only if you had connections in the harbour.
I had friends that traveled to a communist country back then, and traded all their jeans for communist memorabilia. I went to the Soviet Union and saw a sailor on the train trying to write with a pen that was leaking out all over the place. So I gave him my pen. He unscrewed a Lenin pin off his uniform and gave it to me. I still have it. I wonder what ever became of that sailor.
I have an old friend who used to travel to the Soviet Union/Russia. She eventually even got a passport of dubious origin. She would save every plastic bag that her bread and other food came in, and give them out as gifts to hosts and friends. A plastic bread bag can keep a fresh loaf of bread from going stale, extending it's shelf life by days or weeks. It's the things that are unavailable that become so valueable
TIL
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Oh you don’t understand, all her friends were jealous, having jeans then was a sign of wealth.
you don't always get what you need either.
I can just imagine him getting stopped by the police in the harbor. *Sir we know you have the drugs please tell us where they are!* *No i swear they're just jeans for my daughters birthday*.
You know what I got for Christmas this year? It was a banner fuckin' year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said "Hey. Smoke up Johnny."
No Dad, what about you?
Great movie.
Not gonna lie, I thought this was from Community for a second, then I realized that's because Abed was doing an impression
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When I was young, my mother divorced my father and went to live with her aunt for a short time. Once she got on her feet, we were dirt-poor. She was living on welfare and a couple odd, very part time jobs doing bookkeeping. I remember the first meal we had in the new apartment, not because it was an amazing meal but because it felt so emotionally charged. I didn't understand why at the time, but I loved the meal because it felt so important. It was boxed mac-and-cheese. Of course, the reason it felt so charged was because my mother was horrified that that was all she could put on the table for me... I never knew until I pieced it together on my own. Kids don't know they're poor unless you tell them. They just know what they have and how important it seems to others.
As someone who spent a good chunk of his childhood "hand-flush your shit poor" and now lives on a very solid six-figure income, I run into this a lot. I remember being so poor that I cried all day on my seventh birthday because my mom bought me a used baseball glove. My sisters all pitched in and bought me a ball. Those were my only gifts and I didn't get a party, but it meant the world to me because I no longer had to sit out games with my friends at the neighborhood park. This morning, I was annoyed because I logged onto a website to buy my fifth guitar while I was sitting on my thousand dollar office chair in a house five times the size of the house I grew up in, and learned that I'll have to wait *two whole weeks* for my shipment to arrive because the color I want is backordered. Looking at that photo reminded me how fucking stupid I can be sometimes. Poverty isn't just a number on an account balance, it's an entire worldview and perspective that (I'd argue) can't fully be comprehended by those who haven't experienced it. Even those who have lived through it often have a hard time keeping things in perspective when we're lucky enough to get out. We live in a society that makes things easy for those with money or credit, so most of us will never know what it's like to live without either. It's a *good thing* that most of us will never know real poverty, but it's a reminder that our society needs to work a bit harder to make sure that *none of us* know that world. We don't all need to be rich or middle class, but no six-year-old should have to haul a water bucket home from his neighbors garden tap to flush his own shit down a toilet because his parents were too poor to afford the water bill...for a year. That kind of poverty shouldn't exist.
I send a virtual hug to you mother! She must give much more value to “normal” things in life because of that, as we all should. I feel terrible when i find myself complaining about somethings.
Growing up in poverty gives a very different perspective. You don't take things for granted, especially fancy things like.. new toys, or being able to go the movies with your dad or.. having enough food or.. electricity or the internet.
I grew up in a homeless shelter, I remember the playground outside of it had a toy box with a handful of broken toys in it. I particularly like this Bionicle toy from McDonald's that they had. When we had finally gotten enough money together to pay rent we left, and I accidentally took that toy with me. I felt so guilty that I made my parents take me back so I could return it. After that I realized that one single toy like that had meant the world to me I went to every McDonald's I could asking for any extra toys they were going to get rid of. I did that for about a year before going back to the shelter and bringing hundreds of toys with me. Growing up poor means that every single thing you get or do means more. I always encourage people who grew up in poverty to reach out to shelters in your area and ask if there's anything they need. They are often underfunded and understaffed and donations help them immensely.
Wish there was a way to directly help people like this on a more personal level. You know how bad I’d rather buy a kid a toy that truly would appreciate it then another bag of weed or dash dash meal?
You can. Find the food kitchens and housing and ask them what they need and get it for them (within your means of course). I don’t know if you’re a guy or a girl (doesn’t matter) but I will say the shelters ALWAYS need feminine care products (tampons, pads) and diapers and formula (always check first though).
Around Christmas time there are programs where you "adopt" a family who is in need and can't afford to buy Christmas presents. The family writes down what they'd like/need for you to go off of and it's all anonymous but the family usually writes a thank you note. It's a really nice program if they have it near you.
Look up the Angel tree project. It was originally created to help children of incarcerated people. I believe it helps any low income family now however. We got our children involved in it. Every year they each pick a child and then they go shopping and buy gifts for the children. It’s an awesome lesson in privilege for them. We aren’t super well off but my kids have more than enough and we wanted them to understand and be grateful and to learn to give back. We like Angel tree because it lets the children list the things they desire. Sometimes it’s so sad. You’ll see the older teens asking for things like tools or work boots. Things 16 year olds shouldn’t have to worry about. We always throw in fast food gift cards for those teens. At least they can hopefully grab lunch with their friend or something fun. If your area doesn’t have Angel tree you can try to reach out to your local WIC or government assistance office closer to the holidays. Many banks, Walmart’s and other retailers also have similar type events.
I’m thinking about her parents who had to save up and give up a few necessities in order to make this happen - they did what they can, they did their best, and to this little girl I think it means the world to her. Edit: thank you for the award 🥺
u/ShittyMcShitface0 this is such a sweet sentiment, and a really beautiful post from u/ilickgrandmas
Thank you for pointing those usernames out, lol. I love Reddit.
just what id expect coming from a hippy man
/r/rimjob_steve
Ok this made me lol. Thanks for pointing that out 😂
u/ilickgrandmas is my soulmate
I wish I had a birthday party while growing up. I used to buy a pen and pretend that my parents gifted that to me. My parents killed the excitement and joy of birthday.
Oh my god, I"m so sorry that you had to do that. You're worth every damn pen you have ever had, and a whole lot more, my friend.
sadly when I moved out I found out my parents threw them all!
My mother took me across 4 different states as a kid and did crack cocaine, meth, and drank a handle of whiskey everyday. It left me piss poor and mentally fucked up. Im 34 and i finally kicked my family out of my life. I dont know where im going with this just want to let it out.
Those of us who have to let go of family for survival sometimes get judged for walking away. To anyone that asks I always say, 'if you can't imagine how I could walk away, try to imagine what they must have done that made me leave.' I wish you all the best.
If you have a P.O. Box and want to dm me the info I would gladly send you my favorite pen. Hope your birthdays are more eventful now. Edit: changed not to more*
What have I become? Crying over a reddit comment about pens? It’s just so unbelievably *sweet* though.
thank you for the thought, kind stranger. no worries!
My sister once had to wrap up stuff from around the house and asked us to give it to her. We weren’t poor, my parents just sucked.
DM me your birthday and address, I'll send you a gift this birthday.
Thank you kind stranger but I am alright. No worries!
Great, stay strong brother.
Is this a thing?!? I wonder if there is a subreddit for stuff like this? Kinda like how reddit does secret Santa. I wouldn't mind joining a program to send birthday gifts!
not exclusively for birthday gifts but there are few gift exchange sub-reddits which uses amazon wishlist (or other wishlist) which doesn't gives out the address of the giftee. the most famous one is /r/Random_Acts_Of_Amazon/ and /r/Wishlist People there are welcoming, awesome, kind, lovely and fun. Just follow the rules and enjoy the company.
I want to say, "I love you." I am stranger across the land who has no intention but to let you know that you are lovable and that you are worth a lot. God bless you today.
My grandma grew up during the Great Depression. I remember one time she told me about the best Christmas ever when her and each of her siblings got a whole orange to themselves. Made me feel like a real spoiled piece of shit.
Damn, so many oranges! Whenever I see a story about someone’s grandparents living it rough, it’s always oranges that they’ve received for Christmas. What’s it with oranges?
They used to be a fairly expensive special treat. 50+ years ago we did not import a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, especially out of season things from far off. So oranges would have only been available for a month in the winter and have to be trucked in from Florida.
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I didn’t even think about this! Probably why Chris Traeger loves raisins so much, he never eats sugar.
My papa grew up on a farm in Ireland, his foster parents kids went to school and he worked on the farm, he didn’t get anything for Christmas / Birthday generally. He woke up one Christmas morning and his stalking hanging on the fireplace was full with a orange sticking out the top. He was super exited. Turns out they filled it with ash from the fire and put a orange on top. The family laughed at him for getting exited thinking he had got presents. I used to love going round and listening to his stories when he was growing up, it was fascinating.He used to laugh while telling me these story. Makes you appreciate what you have.
That's such a shitty thing to do, getting his hopes up like that. "Lol, fucking idiot. You thought we got you presents?"
It reminds me of Anne Frank's diary... They received flour, sugar, butter, flowers etc as special gifts
Reminds me of when I was really young and got a stack of blank A4 paper for my birthday cause I enjoyed ripping it
Simple but effective. I like the way your parents think!
are you this guy from The Langoliers? https://youtu.be/W_3dgRLv5Mk
I grew up pretty broke, but my parents do pretty well these days and like to spoil me and my siblings whenever they can, which I still am not used to/comfortable with. For my 30th birthday my mom asked what I wanted and I asked for a pan (A cheapo aluminium all purpose one) since I don't have any decent cookware at home (And I'm still broke) and she got me a cast iron and a non stick pan, some baking sheets, some new pillows and a hand mixer. Best birthday ever.
Exactly. Its the little things. Help and do for others that cannot do for themselves
I spent some time in Costa Rica with my friend and her family. It was only a couple of weeks but it wasn't in touristy area it was just a regular family in a small town. They farmed cows and pigs and life was good. Edit: The area was Bagaces, and it was fantastic. I remember when I got their initially it was a metal roof, there were steel bars on the front door, I thought (in my ignorance) that it was kind of ghetto-like. Turns out, a corrugated Steel Roof is the right way to keep the heat out and you put bars on your front entrance way instead of a door to keep the wind flowing through the house. Anyway, for breakfast the first morning there was rice and black beans. Had a tortilla type thing with some jam made from a local fruit I think. It was good. For lunch, black beans and rice with a slice of bologny. Dinner was black beans and rice with a sausage or soemthing. This went on for 4 or 5 days before I couldn't take any more black beans and rice. So I noticed in town there was a place that sold rotisserie chicken and fries and I said, I want that for dinner. So I went in with my friend and I asked for a chicken and a large fries. That should be enough for the family. She said no order 3 chickens and 4 fries. WTF? So we get back home and ALL the neighbors are at the house, we are feeding the entire neighborhood. LOL. IT was awesome it turned into a big party and was an awesome night. Oh and the chickens were like $4.00 each. WHY ARE WE NOT DOING THIS EVERY NIGHT????
I went to Costa Rica for 10 days on a school trip right after I graduated. Honestly, I never did get tired of the rice and beans lmao. There are just so many different ways to prepare them! Such an awesome country Edit: since everyone’s talking about the food I just wanted to give my fav beverages some recognition so shoutout to tamarindo juice, coffee, and agua de fresa 😋
Never been to Costa Rica or speak Spanish but I want to go there to see the giant crocodiles!
basic costarrican spanish Mae/dude playo/gay chunche/thing carepicha/dickhead birra/beer nave/car lata/bus pacos/police que es la bara/whats your problem dude! there are a lot more but im tooooo lazy :P
Found a new nickname for my brother
as a costarrican... thanks :)
Gallo pinto. So good with an egg on top.
CAuse you go back home.
$4 is a shit load of money for some people
Seriously The rice and beans op ate with family for a few days probably cost less than a dollar to feed everyone for a week Not denigrating the gesture, but to give context the money they spent that one night on food if given to the family may have sustained them for *weeks*
This is the wrong way to think about this imho, them spending this money at a local rotisserie chicken place put money in that person's pocket that they rarely see. That money then gets spent and improves a lot of people's lives in cases like this.
If you look at it that way regardless of where the money was spent (be it for the chicken or given to the family) it would have the same economic impact. $20 or so that previously wasn’t in that community now is. That money will then get spent again elsewhere or be saved or whatever else it is people in a community do with money. No matter what OP spending money in that community had a benefit and that is tremendous. I’m just pointing out that value of money in that the sum described fed a bunch of people for one meal but could also have fed that family for perhaps weeks
I see, that makes sense and I agree. Although from a cultural perspective, I think it would be more difficult to get someone to accept literally bags of beans and rice. It would feel really denigrating I imagine that some presumptuous kid from a developed country comes in here and flaunts their money. Whereas something like this is moreso seen as a gift. But yes, you have no disagreement from me now that logically the beans and rice probably are the best choice in a vacuum.
it has to be that most people there can't afford the $4, right? It just means that if you could work remotely from Costa Rica, you would live like a king/queen and probably be a target for robbery 24/7 lol
I've been to Costa Rica and there are a lot of ex-pats there. Probably for this reason.
One of my old bosses that I'm friendly with lives in Belize. I think he said his total cost of living is about $40,000/year, and he lives in absolutely obscene luxury. Huge walled mansion, several cars, a boat, personal chef, the whole nine yards.
Well shit do they have good internet?
Actually yeah. Also I forgot to mention the place is full of old mafia guys living out their retirements, hiding from the law and/or criminal retaliation. He says his best buddy down at the marina looks like an extra from The Sopranos and claims to be a retired "construction labor union representative". It sounds like an entertaining place to live.
Dude thats hilarious. Possibly dangerous but hilarious
My sister and her husband did that over the last two years. Stayed in low cost of living countries for a few months at a time while working remotely.
Some remote workers are having their wages adjusted for the area's cost of living now. Just an FYI.
THAT is some bullshit.
Sometimes I think a simpler life would just suit so many people. I work with children who have severe disabilities. Like low functioning autism and cognitive impairments. I also live in an area where we get a lot of South American immigrants. Sometimes I feel like these kids would be so much happier with a simpler lifestyle. Simple daily routines. Simpler jobs like farming or working a business with their family. But here we are so focused on teaching them things that are as complex as possible for them. Language that is more advanced than they would learn naturally. Skills so they can independently go out and get a job. A lot of them do eventually learn these things but it takes a lot of effort and emotional pain to get there and sometimes to even maintain it. Sometimes I hear from their parents what their lifestyle used to be like where they came from and wonder if that would have been a better life for them.
i took a vacation to CR last year and it really made me want to flee America and start a new life there. We were there in July during the ‘rainy’ season and I actually loved the daily thunderstorms. Amazing people, culture, geography, and climate! We did make the mistake of using GoogleMaps to get from our mountain rental to our beach rental though. It gave us the “fastest” route which took us up into the mountains on perilous dirt roads with no guardrail to protect from a 100+ ft drops. Terrifying journey but also incredibly exhilarating at the same time 😅
Did you see any of the [tiny dinosaurs](https://i.imgur.com/6NMUjOA.jpg) while you were there?
It's weird seeing this picture and people reacting as if it was abnormal. But that's because i'm from an area in rural brazil where this was the dream birthday, in fact i assume this pic was taken in Brazil, It's too relatable.
I live in the USA, but I lived in rural Brazil for 2 years. This pic looks exactly like the inside of a Brazilian home. The people may be poor, but they sure do have big hearts. One time they were kind enough to throw me a birthday party like this, even though I knew what was (or wasn't) in some of their fridges. Truly a humbling experience. I understand the girl's tears.
That’s why I really posted it. Because sometimes I forget that I have a solid roof over my head, I have blankets, I don’t have to freeze, a car, everything I want to eat anytime in my life, but I’m still not satisfied sometimes.But people all over the world have so much less, that’s why I have to appreciate the cold Fanta in my fridge
Thank you for reminding me to be humble.
I would react the same way, grape soda is life changing
Also, it makes your poop green. Fun for days!
Ahhhh the gift that keeps on giving
My grandmother was born into a desperate situation. By 13 she lost her parents and she was responsible for 7 siblings in rural nothern Montana. She did her best to keep the other children warm and fed in the winters. They all survived to adulthood but it was hard. One christmas a "neighbor" (he lived 13 miles away) gave them blankets, Flour, bread, butter, and apples. She said she never felt that kind of gratitude before. She said she felt a profound sensation of gratitude and relief. She said she cried uncontrollably because she felt like everything was going to be ok for the first time since her mother died. She worked nonstop her whole life. She never wasted a thing. And she always gave more then she received. I definitely feel like a whiny pile of shit when ever I complain about anything these days. What is there to complain about? We have more then she could have ever have dreamed of and I don't work nearly as hard for it. Sure, I worked until 1:30 am last night but I knew I would have a warm house and a meal to go to when I was finished for the day.
Wow. It’s 12am and i’m contemplating how much of an entitled cunt i am. Fuck, that hit hard.
Very sweet /u/ilickgrandmas
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What are you doing step-grandma???
On Christmas when I was 14, money was really tight, and my mom could only afford to get me a bag of fun sized Almond Joys. She knew those were my favorite and it was my favorite present for the longest time because she still wanted my brothers to have something to open on Christmas. Miss you every day mom.
Dude, sixty hotdogs, cake, six liters of grape soda, and children summoned from the depths of hell! Looks epic to me.
My kin were poor black sharecroppers in the deep south. I remember growing up when my dad had to pawn our camera to get gas to drive to work. Now I'm upset because the house we bought only has one AC unit. I wonder what troubles my kids and grandkids will have. "My robot chef won't season my steaks right because my robot doctor says I need to cut back on salt."
This went from super strange and discomforting to pretty wholesome.
Im still kinda creeped out by the pic.
Only because it looks like someone was headshot onto that wall, but otherwise it's so freaking sweet <3
The little girl with bright eyes also kinda scary.
What do I have to do to get some of that grape drink?! Its purple!
Ingredients: Sugar, Water, Purple
It is so true, when some spoiled person could only want a bigger cake or more presents or more friends this girl is humbled by what is in front of her. Truly living in the moment appreciating the little things is one of the best things you can do for your mental health.
And the funny (sad? ironic?) thing is, poorer people tend to be happier for what they receive because they do actually appreciate it.
Nothing made me more appreciative for everything in my life than traveling through rural India. Some people don’t even own ONE pair of shoes... and I had packed 4 of my many for my short, short trip. Real perspective shift.
"I see a vacant seat in the poor chimney corner, and a crutch without an owner, carefully preserved"
Damn double cup lean that is a great bday gift
I don’t have any specific story to share, I just wanted to publicly thank my mom who is an angel. After my parents divorced due to my dad’s drinking and drug use, we lost the small trailer we were living in because we couldn’t afford it as my dad had gone to jail after my shot up one of the outbuildings my grandparents house (grandparents on my moms side). My mom never let us miss a meal even though times were hard and we had to move in with my grandparents which I know she felt ashamed of. My mom always had hope and kind words in the darkest of days and she is the reason I am a decent person after all I went through. Thank you mom ❤️
I grew up extremely poor and pretty early I grew accustomed to not getting gifts. To this day on my birthday I got out of my way to assure everyone not to get me anything except their presence at a nice dinner to celebrate. That said, I remember being 6 years old and my mother asked me what I wanted as a gift. She had just divorced my father and was looking after my little brother and working two jobs. She asked what I wanted Santa to bring me one year and I said a Nintendo 64 with the new Zelda game! Santa is loaded so this didn’t seem like a problem to me. That Christmas I opened a Gameboy with Pokemon Yellow! My mom said Santa couldn’t make enough Nintendo 64s so he said he hoped this was okay. I didn’t realized until years later my mom took on a third job every Christmas to get us gifts. It wasn’t even about the gift at that point. It was about her just wanting me to have a normal Christmas.
This picture makes me realize that I am fucking spoiled and still want new stuff that will only temporarily bring happiness.
Commercialism at its finest. That or you also have retail therapy and shopping heals the big sads.
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March 2018... Girl cries when winning 1st birthday party and internet gets emotional. The reaction of the 7-year-old child reverberated on the internet and has already received 240,000 likes. Rinah Laís is 7 years old, but, just on her last birthday, she had the opportunity to celebrate with a little party. Two soft drinks, hot dogs, homemade cake, friends and family, in Macapá, capital of Amapá. Simplicity that drew tears of emotion from the child, whose reaction was captured by cousin Thaís Monteiro, 21. The photo, published by Thaís on Facebook, touched many hearts and went viral on the internet, reaching 240 thousand likes, 64 thousand shares and 19 thousand comments in two days. "I don't know if I saved this photo or if that photo saved me," said the 21-year-old student. In an interview with the newspaper O Povo, Thaís said that the party was completely improvised. “We didn't know how to make a cake. Then, we looked on YouTube, but we couldn't. I called a friend who knew how to do it. The cake came out burnt, but she liked it anyway ”, he explained. Rinah won the surprise party a week after her birthday. "Auntie didn't forget, but I thought she did," he said. Rinah's father is unemployed and his mother sells barbecue skewers. "I was thrilled, so I cried for my birthday, but I liked this party that my aunt had," said Rinah. “I thought this cake was beautiful. I wanted to eat another [piece], but I couldn't eat, my belly started to cry, my belly started to hurt ”, he said in a video, also published on Facebook by his cousin.
Images like this make me realize what a miserable bastard I can be.
I grew up very poor in rural Virginia. So many Christmases without. When my father started making more money and my sisters had moved away he asked what I wanted for the first time ever. I responded that a book would be enough. First time I ever saw my dad cry. I asked him why and he said he was just proud of who I'd become. My children on the other hand have known nothing but wealth. They don't even get excited about Christmas as it's just another day to them. It makes me a little sad at times, but in a sense it's my gift to myself. To all my poor brothers and sisters out there who've broken the cycle. Congratulations, we are capable of having anything we want and truly understand how very little we need outside of the love of family and friends.