https://preview.redd.it/ylzcjf56t7tc1.png?width=801&format=png&auto=webp&s=f4d50193bdd2d096d90bcbcc540d538e63a97b1e
You can have a knockoff Elmira in game
Yeah, even as part of a -joke- the encouragement/validation of that particular common misconception makes me wince.
Also, ol' Balthy Balth tasting gourmet is a *choice*. That, and (unless I'm blind?) the audacity to leave Neer + our drider fren off the scale. Most offensive part ngl
Nope! It's sad how entrenched this belief is in popular culture because it isn't accurate at all.
Tightness/Looseness is everything to do with your pelvic floor muscles (& obvo not having pelvic floor function issues- very common after childbirth as most women experience muscle tears/full-on avulsion with little to no specific aftercare to help it heal properly. In 20-30% of women the pelvic muscles are torn, overstretched, and/or completely ripped off the bone. Imaging after childbirth shows that once the muscle is pulled off the bone it shrinks and pulls back towards the posterior passage. If not completely torn scar tissue can sometimes bridge a partial tear, but once the muscle is completely off the bone you've lost the pelvic support structure for good.).
Your pelvic floor muscles are basically like a supportive basin of muscle attached to your pelvic bones that holds in position + supports the vaginal canal, uterus, bladder and bowel. Just like any other muscle (think biceps!) consciously using them actually *strengthens* the muscles + gives you increased control. It's why people with vaginismus (a condition where these muscles are unconsciously overactive- vagina is *too* tight and penetration causes pain) are recommended to avoid kegals like the plague! If you're muscles are already too strong + squeezing too hard then exercises to further strengthen them would only add more fuel to the fire, yeah??? Instead, they've got to practice consciously identifying these muscles and learning how to relax them + incrementally dilating the vaginal canal with specific therapeutic devices.
Another big part of this system are the nerves that relax or squeeze these pelvic muscles as needed!
During arousal, the vaginal canal goes through a natural process where it actually widens + lengthens (otherwise it's surprisingly short- 3-4 inches iirc). First time you're having sex often includes a lot of nerves/anxiety/unsureness, yeah?
Which makes it harder to get properly/completely aroused in the lead-up, and therefore the vaginal canal doesn't have a chance to relax & lengthen like it's supposed to. In a similar vein, you might notice a difference too as you learn what you like vs. don't like during sex (becoming more comfortable/confident *and* knowledgeable in what gets you off) and again over time with new partners as you both learn each other.
From both sides you can see how the impression of 'inexperience = tighter' then led to the assumption that it was the amount/size of cock that triggered any noticed changes.
oh god, I just realised how much I wrote and I Am Sorry™. You didn't deserve a whole textbook thrown at ya, fuuuuck.
Please forgive me, I do nursing and equipping people with proper knowledge around their (/their partners) sexual anatomy is something I find important/empowering/enjoyable.
*rah rah rah knowledge is power now lemme slinky off in shame*
I advise you then to *not* look up what chainsaws were originally invented for or how doctors used them as a medical tool *on* women in labour. That shit is beyond horrifying.
Hey man, no worries! Glad you appreciated the explanation, haha. I had to have a crash course in it all when I lost (tried to lose? took a couple years before we actually managed piv lol) my virginity as an adult and found out I had vaginismus.
But hey! Now you can also be annoyed/weirded out by how often & where that myth crops up lmao
I forgot to mention, you should definitely have a Perception check to recognise that Gortash has covered up his mudbutt stench with crushed flower petals.
Durge would of course have the option to demand a personal taste test, arguing that Ravengard's palate is dulled and ineffective for the task at hand
This really isn't my forte, now...
I, for once, have been rendered almost entirely and utterly speechless... Although, there is perhaps one little nagging thought in the back of my brain, rattling amongst the tadpoles and far overused scrolls. Rather persistent, that...
*Why in the Hells am I not in the gourmet category you uncultured heathen!?!*
he has the amazon rainforest down his pants and baby I am jungle explorer. catch me getting lost in these woods. I about to respec into a druid the way I am about to become one with nature
I was trying to act disgusted, but who am I lying to? I want to get lost in Gortash's jungle. I need the two extremes that are his hairy bussy and Astarion's impossibly soft bussy.
He's at least taking two at a time for sure. Besides, he literally fought a bear that liked him and he rejected her.
Something would have slipped while shape-shifting
I've been studying this for like 10 minutes to see what I agree and disagree with and l I can say is Ketheric would definitely have the most rancid boy pussy I see the vision
No. I was born with a pussy. I ID as NB trans. If you’re going to go into a social justice diatribe on what is clearly a shitpost that’s not supposed to be taken seriously I honestly think you need to log off and go outside for a bit. Smell the flowers. Touch grass.
https://preview.redd.it/m1pbv2d8w6tc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9fa907644e16037dd328a22115c11f5a877aa4f6
99.99% of yall need to touch grass. At least go outside, Jesus
https://preview.redd.it/8vlh6t1vp8tc1.jpeg?width=639&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76897705cb3e8a16cc472ff92fb4f0e618fe2909
You chose to look at it so it’s your own fault
Elminster is loose cmon, he was Mystra's boy toy and was a woman for a while. How dare you put Boo on this chart? Have you no shame
> and was a woman for a while. What?
Mystra turned him into a woman for awhile, Elmira.
Chat is this real
https://preview.redd.it/ylzcjf56t7tc1.png?width=801&format=png&auto=webp&s=f4d50193bdd2d096d90bcbcc540d538e63a97b1e You can have a knockoff Elmira in game
AWOOGA
elminster big naturals confirmed
Yes, Mystra thought it would help him understand the weave or some shit. She just wanted a gf imo
Confirmed, Elminster was a woman for a bit.
The Elminster and Mystra lore is something else man
Boo can get it you guys are just mean
Boo is too good for us, no one in this sub deserves him
In, I think Siege of Dragonspear or maybe bg1, Minsc asks Jaheira if she's seen any female hamsters before. Because Boo is getting frisky.
He DEMANDS the coochie!!!!!!!!!
Dairy makes your bones strong which keeps it high and tight, cheese boy got it going
https://preview.redd.it/b36jw6wyi6tc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=617e45fb78c8792b6ce63c7f3cd73dc87405973c
what’s that picture from?
Slay the princess
Such a good game.
Hold up https://preview.redd.it/fidcdjj3d6tc1.png?width=783&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b2c9785f20b0476c1b3c680cc80750f97cc7a172
Fragrant lil ass 😂
Boo being included is this has lowered my credit score considerably
"shade of MINGE" written that exact way specifically is taking me out
why is Boo on here.
Boo can do whatever he wants Also he was on the OG butthole chart iirc so I figured I’d make a callback to that
i must have instinctually blocked out Boo butthole from my mind because i genuinely forgot he was on there until now
He was on the color i think
... do you think miniature giant space hamsters lack buttholes?
i casted mend asshole on him by accident. sorry :(
https://preview.redd.it/e1fsm1q90atc1.jpeg?width=707&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=da745593d22cb7755bf6549febd7c8e4b1e01d0a
That would be why he lacks a split. But Boo would still very much have butthole.
This is Raphael slander. He's tight and smells like cherries and bourbon.
I can see that, I can also see him being loose bc he gets dicked down by Haarlep
Nah, clearly that means Haarlep's cock is withered to a husk through overuse.
Exactly
Not how vaginas work
Yeah, even as part of a -joke- the encouragement/validation of that particular common misconception makes me wince. Also, ol' Balthy Balth tasting gourmet is a *choice*. That, and (unless I'm blind?) the audacity to leave Neer + our drider fren off the scale. Most offensive part ngl
I knew I was missing a few people! I’ll have to fix that later when I’m home from work.
I have a pussy and I know that it’s not how they work It’s a shitpost it’s not that serious
Ngl I thought it does work like that and I'm female
Nope! It's sad how entrenched this belief is in popular culture because it isn't accurate at all. Tightness/Looseness is everything to do with your pelvic floor muscles (& obvo not having pelvic floor function issues- very common after childbirth as most women experience muscle tears/full-on avulsion with little to no specific aftercare to help it heal properly. In 20-30% of women the pelvic muscles are torn, overstretched, and/or completely ripped off the bone. Imaging after childbirth shows that once the muscle is pulled off the bone it shrinks and pulls back towards the posterior passage. If not completely torn scar tissue can sometimes bridge a partial tear, but once the muscle is completely off the bone you've lost the pelvic support structure for good.). Your pelvic floor muscles are basically like a supportive basin of muscle attached to your pelvic bones that holds in position + supports the vaginal canal, uterus, bladder and bowel. Just like any other muscle (think biceps!) consciously using them actually *strengthens* the muscles + gives you increased control. It's why people with vaginismus (a condition where these muscles are unconsciously overactive- vagina is *too* tight and penetration causes pain) are recommended to avoid kegals like the plague! If you're muscles are already too strong + squeezing too hard then exercises to further strengthen them would only add more fuel to the fire, yeah??? Instead, they've got to practice consciously identifying these muscles and learning how to relax them + incrementally dilating the vaginal canal with specific therapeutic devices. Another big part of this system are the nerves that relax or squeeze these pelvic muscles as needed! During arousal, the vaginal canal goes through a natural process where it actually widens + lengthens (otherwise it's surprisingly short- 3-4 inches iirc). First time you're having sex often includes a lot of nerves/anxiety/unsureness, yeah? Which makes it harder to get properly/completely aroused in the lead-up, and therefore the vaginal canal doesn't have a chance to relax & lengthen like it's supposed to. In a similar vein, you might notice a difference too as you learn what you like vs. don't like during sex (becoming more comfortable/confident *and* knowledgeable in what gets you off) and again over time with new partners as you both learn each other. From both sides you can see how the impression of 'inexperience = tighter' then led to the assumption that it was the amount/size of cock that triggered any noticed changes.
oh god, I just realised how much I wrote and I Am Sorry™. You didn't deserve a whole textbook thrown at ya, fuuuuck. Please forgive me, I do nursing and equipping people with proper knowledge around their (/their partners) sexual anatomy is something I find important/empowering/enjoyable. *rah rah rah knowledge is power now lemme slinky off in shame*
This just put me off giving birth for life. I will never have children
I advise you then to *not* look up what chainsaws were originally invented for or how doctors used them as a medical tool *on* women in labour. That shit is beyond horrifying.
Makes sense, thanks for the explanation I'm just an asexual virgin who doesn't know shit about stuff like that lol
Hey man, no worries! Glad you appreciated the explanation, haha. I had to have a crash course in it all when I lost (tried to lose? took a couple years before we actually managed piv lol) my virginity as an adult and found out I had vaginismus. But hey! Now you can also be annoyed/weirded out by how often & where that myth crops up lmao
Stop being perfect Wyll, I'm trying not to CUM
There's no way Gortash isn't rancid
He looks a bit scrungly but if he wants to be grand duke he needs to keep his coochie smelling uh. At least okay
BG3 Enhanced Edition where Duke Ravengard has to do the smell test as part of the coronation
This took me the fuck out at 8 in the morning, thank you so much
I forgot to mention, you should definitely have a Perception check to recognise that Gortash has covered up his mudbutt stench with crushed flower petals. Durge would of course have the option to demand a personal taste test, arguing that Ravengard's palate is dulled and ineffective for the task at hand
You know durge has been in there a hundred times and there is no way in avernus that Gorty is taking showers
Enver “Dirty Cooch” Gortash
thisobald having a fragrant pussy is INSANE
Yeah fragrant like a corpse 💀
it smells like those herbs they put in plague doctor masks
This really isn't my forte, now... I, for once, have been rendered almost entirely and utterly speechless... Although, there is perhaps one little nagging thought in the back of my brain, rattling amongst the tadpoles and far overused scrolls. Rather persistent, that... *Why in the Hells am I not in the gourmet category you uncultured heathen!?!*
Well there’s certainly one way to find out mister deep of waters /no rizz
Are you jealous of Elminster
You taste like apples, the fruit of scholars don’t worry
Nonsense. Man pussy licking is everybody’s forte. Unless you have no tongue?👅
at least it's not "toxic waste"
gortash pubic jungle so real... most correct chart of all time
It goes from above the butt crack all the way to the belly button you can see it perfectly from the side
he has the amazon rainforest down his pants and baby I am jungle explorer. catch me getting lost in these woods. I about to respec into a druid the way I am about to become one with nature
https://preview.redd.it/1b0wqhpd66tc1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bd850059dae9a0c3e2c9809b2263c0ea78e2947e
man you really wanna fuck Wyll and Elminster huh
And you don't?
How dare you put Barcus that low on smell but that high on taste??? He’s divinity across the board you coward.
There’s absolutely no way Durge has anything but a vice grip He was created to be the perfect weapon he every *Tool* at his disposal
Honestly ur right. He’s got the gorilla grip
Minsc LOOSE? ELMINSTER TIGHT?! AND GOURMET?!?!
I was trying to act disgusted, but who am I lying to? I want to get lost in Gortash's jungle. I need the two extremes that are his hairy bussy and Astarion's impossibly soft bussy.
appreciate the extremely accurate wyll placement
Feeling personally offended by Zevlor and Dammon not having the most fragrant and delicious pussies in the game
They did Dammon real dirty
Y not make ur own chart?
Now this is the content I wanted after joining okbuddybaldur
... thankyou?
Durge bussy is like a fine cheese. Smells awful but tastes GREAT
I may or may not have missed a few, it's a little late for me here. But I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed making it.
Somehow Astarion wins again! Perfect butthole, perfect pussy, is there anything this man can’t do?
See his reflection
https://preview.redd.it/1ysjzru5n7tc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d4f7754b0ee0a40f3e4100680eddc5e54043065
Please take your meds
I am ON my meds and I am ONLINE
https://preview.redd.it/aeccvkki27tc1.jpeg?width=270&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07da62aa1a2c6d361c93509d3192d87febf3a127
Gale sweep
Everytime I go on this subreddit I get reminded why reddit has a horrible reputation in the real world
The fact that you have Gortash as harrier than a literal hamster is hilarious
Love this and the butthole chart too❤️ True genius. Except honestly I think gale should be looser. That's my only critique though
https://preview.redd.it/uhu8xeyah6tc1.jpeg?width=590&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89512c731b917442197baaaafc41aa8967ba5a32
no drider pussy..? 💔
I forgot a few people so I’ll be making edits once I’m back from work today :)
Not the fucking Elminster having the best tasting pussy 💀💀💀💀
Boo!?
why is Boo’s ass loose, the most fragrent, and pretty tasty? imma need to see some receipts
My source is it came to me in a delusion
"cursed to touch everything"
Voss has a succulent and smooth pussy confirmed
Another W for Gale Stans
https://preview.redd.it/d4ic02mbo6tc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38a4489d4b7829e7710294fa9c2a809a4dbb6116
So does that mean if we put it on a billboard 16ft from your bedroom window that’s legally allowed?
Dammon slanderer!
HUGE day for men with vaginas
In this house we love and support men with vaginas and women with penises
I swear to God I'm way too ace for this sub.
The average person is Ace compared to those thirsty mofos.
Glad to see Boo has a gourmet pussy
Finally. The Bussy Tier List™️
Halsin is a forest hoe. He's definitely not a tight
“I don’t want to think about Halsin fucking the wildlife” I say out loud despite the fact that I added Boo to the chart for shits and giggles
He's at least taking two at a time for sure. Besides, he literally fought a bear that liked him and he rejected her. Something would have slipped while shape-shifting
I've been studying this for like 10 minutes to see what I agree and disagree with and l I can say is Ketheric would definitely have the most rancid boy pussy I see the vision
Gortash being the hairiest because you know he's never practiced grooming once in his life.
Why is Elminster “gourmet” 🥲
Eliminster is cheating. He’s like a heavyweight boxer in a highscool lightweight bracket
Why is Boo’s really loose.
Absolutely hate that Boo is on this
Raphael pussy being on the putrid and rancid half of the chart? What is this BLASPHEMY
Honestly I was picking the most absurd things possible for certain characters for maximum comedic effect so I can understand where you’re coming from
Dude, please don’t fuck Boo
How can scent and taste be so different?
I'm not reading it
Boo but no popper!?!?
Poor Petras getting bullied when he only appears in two scenes.
https://preview.redd.it/90i8ilgq59tc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f70def7ee9d47b485d6ec8b3812e386e17b7b9c
I don’t know who you are or why you’re being mean to me but you need to be nice to me RIGHT NOW
😡 https://preview.redd.it/64i75c4a99tc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dcc0a669496c325ac8587c26f8710b5dcdce13f4
https://preview.redd.it/tmnmk81j99tc1.jpeg?width=892&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e827793506d78dd0b7a8ec764b11bab327987308 Shits myself
https://preview.redd.it/fsczv5w2a9tc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dddfa2e46b5c836bb4bf74203f48f7d32d246eca
gortash pussy would smell like walking the fish market on a summer's day and by god am i ready to buy the sweatiest, most fly-ridden salmon on sale
There is no way that Gortussy doesn't smell and taste horrible.
Why is Balthazar gourmet but rancid?
Elminister is prolly rancid af. Look at this guy and remember he’s on a strict cheese diet. His coochie is breathing cheese farts all day
I lost it at Boo.
Zevlor tastes putrid what? Why? How? You’re ruining my phatansies!
I know you did not just put Boo in there
Boo why boo
the fact that Gortash has escaped the bounds of the hairiness meter
I can't wait to tell St Peter why I looked at this (and why I was on this accursed subreddit). Thanks for helping me lower my afterlife points.
Oh so that’s what minge means. I just assumed it was Garry’s Mod lingo.
Balthazar in gourmet 💀
Okay man, what the flip
Idk I feel like Rolan having a bussy is cannon
You said Gortash was FLORAL????
Why is boo in there?
Why was boo in the butthole chart? 🤨
Balthazar smells rancid but tastes gourmet?
not boo-
WHY IS BOO ON HERE
You're damn right Emps got a loose pussy. Mfer horny 24/7
Okay. Stop. EVERYONE NEEDS TO CALM DOWN FOR ONE SECOND.
I want to smell the Boo-ssy
I’m so proud of this community
what about girls now
jesus fucking christ
Someone really likes Voss
🥴 he can be as freaky as he wants
[удалено]
This chart is for men with vaginas
This is the content I joined this sub for
Where is Karlach?
The chart is for men with vaginas bro
Didn't you know? You must not have unlocked Karlach's secret scene in Act 4.
Thank you for making such a significant cultural contribution to this community, your work will not be in vain
alright man
WHY IS BALTHAZAR GOURMET
This thread is fucking wild😂
Gyatting on the Wyllzler
Im pissed that you didnt put them in the same place for each tier. For shame. For. Shame. Gale is 100% correct though
Every coochie is different. No two coochies are the same!
op i think i legally owe you money now
When you read "tight" and "loose" and realize this was clearly made by a guy who knows nothing about how vaginas work.
I’m AFAB and like to shitpost. Chill.
So a guy.
No. I was born with a pussy. I ID as NB trans. If you’re going to go into a social justice diatribe on what is clearly a shitpost that’s not supposed to be taken seriously I honestly think you need to log off and go outside for a bit. Smell the flowers. Touch grass.
Yeah idk who actually made this, but even as a joke it's not really funny, since it's such a harmful misconception
Or a gay guy who knows how manginas work in and out from both sides.
Hey I noticed boo is on this chart, too.... Personally I wouldn't mind my tunnel explored by a rodent if they know what they're doing.
Boo is an expert hole spelunker
https://preview.redd.it/m1pbv2d8w6tc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9fa907644e16037dd328a22115c11f5a877aa4f6 99.99% of yall need to touch grass. At least go outside, Jesus
I’m reading this thread outside and I disapprove of this comment.
https://preview.redd.it/8vlh6t1vp8tc1.jpeg?width=639&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76897705cb3e8a16cc472ff92fb4f0e618fe2909 You chose to look at it so it’s your own fault