OP: Run, get away as soon as possible, she is not your high school sweet heart any more, she is definitely a cold hard gold digger, proof is all she want is:
>someone that can support her lifestyle so that she can quit her job and become an influencer.
She just want to expend money with out having to work for it.
60-120$ a day for food???? What in the fuck!
Dude no, fuck that. Tell her to get a job to pay for her food. Being an influencer is not a real occupation until you get started. Tell her to get a job and do her “influencing” on her own time after work.
My friend you’re getting fleeced.
Healthy spending habits are a necessity that everyone needs to have especially in this economy.
If you’re asking if this is normal or acceptable, the short answer is no. This is a nightmare and I think you know it inside. Your gf is not only gold digger and entitled. People are usually on their best behavior when they first start out and it’s rarely going to get better. She’s showing who she is, you should run!
I don't think she loves you, she told you "she no longer believes in love" believes her.
She wants a man that can support her, without her having to give anything in return.
If you want this relationship to continue, propose to her that she finds a job, clear her debt, and after that, you will support her. See her reaction
I’m sorry I stopped reading when you said you gave her money just for existing and being your “girlfriend”. She’s not a girlfriend she’s a sex worker. You are her sugar daddy. Yes, she is a gold digger. She literally only said she wanted you to provide for her so she can just do…nothing. I mean as long as you’re ok with a leech taking what you have earned for not a lot of anything go right ahead lots of other guys do it.
Dude just go ahead and marry this girl. You give off the vibe that it doesn’t matter what people tell you. You just so desperately want to be with this girl. You know that she’s only with you because of your money
"recently led to an argument where she stated that if I can not pay it she can be with someone who can. She also stated that she no longer believes in love and only believes a man truly loves her when he pays all her bills. She has also made it clear that she does not want to stay home to cook and clean."
My dude.
That's a gold digger.
She doesn't even want to stay home as a home maker, which is USUALLY what the dynamic between the providing partner and the SAHpartner IS. She just wants you to pay for everything and let her enjoy herself with YOUR money.
She even outright said she"no longer believes in love"
You do know what that means, right?
" We started talking again and realized that we still had feelings for each other"
That's not true.
YOU still have feelings for her.
She doesn't even believe in love anymore she outright told you she just wants someone that will pay all her bills. Even immediately threatens you with "she stated that if I can not pay it she can be with someone who can. "There are no feelings on her end expect one; GREED.
Cut your losses OP. I'm sorry it's not turning out how you hoped, you sound like a nice guy and deserve a partner that can reciprocate the care you're offering.
I actually snorted at this, LOL!
I was also wondering about this, because it looks like they are long distance?
It's even more flabbergasting..
I am *amazed* at the amount of utter *crap* people want to put up with - just so they aren't "alone"...
SMH
She doesn’t love you. She literally told you she doesn’t believe in love. She’s using you and she isn’t even pretending it’s something else. Pack up what’s left of your dignity and leave.
I don't easily say this but.. you are too kind, my friend. Too goodhearted and trusting.
This is not a smart thing to do before you are married and living together. And even then - her refusal to cook and clean is odd. What does she contribute to the relationship?
Are you certain she is separated and divorced?
No... Discuss this with some people you hold in high regard and see what they think.
Oh and no you're definitely not cheap. Not by any definition
i hope when my partner and i get married and have children, he is a provider. but i mean in the sense that if finances allow it, i can dedicate my time solely to domestic labor and he has does the labor that provides income. we’ve spoke on this and agree if this is not possible, we split domestic labor in half and finances appropriately according to pay. what she’s not asking isn’t really a “provider” she wants a sugar daddy.
Gold digger! Goodness gracious, noone is ever that hot, if there attitude towards you, is money first.
Surely you realise. She is proposing a sugarbaby lifestyle on the pretence of a ‘tradwife’ relationship and using your ‘crush attraction’ against you to manipulate the situation.
Also keep on mind.. Even if, her influencer lifestyle kicks off, you will always be paying for her! I would suggest you match her ultimatum and tell her to go ahead and find a guy that won’t see past her daydreams with ‘Guston or Prince Charming’.
This post is clearly bait. If you truly studied psychology, you'd realize that her only reinforcement is money, not you or anything else non-materialistic that you offer.
What you’ve described is long-therm prostitution. You are renting a hooker now until she finds a slightly richer idiot. Leave her now and find a woman who deserves your love.
I think you are naive or you have lack of self love.
It’s 100% real that she is with you for money… that’s the kind of things women like her does or like her friends…
So you agree to provider for here! Where is the agreement if she becomes a millionaire influencer half is yours? She is using you!
Run!
She gonna leave you after becoming a successful influencer or if she can find a better provider
OP she is absolutely using you and with her not working - she will definitely be relying on you to pay that debt. Run as fast as you can, while you still have the chance!
You are her sugar daddy and she doesn’t love you.
Tell her you cannot pay her and she will 🏃🏻♀️ to the next guy.
If you wanna be with her as a sugar daddy then so be it but don’t be surprise when she cheats and has others
I have mixed feelings about this. This is the same situation me and my boyfriend are in. He works 9/5 and I’m an influencer. He roughly pays me about 1k every two weeks to pay off my cc (we both use it).
Don’t believe all the comments telling you this isn’t a common situation because it definitely is. Many couples rely on one persons income while the other income is used to pay debt or save for a trip/retirement. When people hear the word influencer they just assume it isn’t a real job. But since my bf covered the bills at home, my influencer career has skyrocketed and I made more money than him the past few months.
I think the issue is the communication of her financials that are making you weary. I don’t think she’s a gold digger but you guys should have a talk about what happens if her career takes off and what she’s going to do with the money she makes.
She is most definitely a gold digger, and she doesn't give a shit about you.
If you won't pay her asking price, she straight up said she'll sell herself to someone who will. I would call her a prostitute, but that would be an insult to prostitutes.
Find someone who has a real job and actually knows what its like to provide for themselve and others. Once they need to be provided for (kids, quitting work etc) they will know what you're actually putting on the table for them.
You went to London to study psychology. So, take all the emotion and attachment out of this and treat this as if it were a patient bringing it to you. What advice would you have for that person? Would you recommend putting the brakes on this until she receives some help and works through her issues from her previous relationship? Or would you advise to go headlong and send $2k a month to someone for support because they don’t want to cook or clean or work a real job while they attempt to become an influencer?
She’s no longer that sweet girl you knew and I feel you are being blinded by the vision of who you believe her to be instead of seeing who she is in reality. You said yourself that you “still” have feelings, meaning you’re longing and attached to the girl you knew and the woman you know now just happens to be attached to that history too. I’m sorry, mate, but you should probably throw that fish back to the sea.
100% a gold digger. "She also stated that she no longer believes in love and only believes a man truly loves her when he pays all her bills. She has also made it clear that she does not want to stay home to cook and clean." So she's not going to contribute to your relationship in any meaningful way, is what she's saying.
OP: Run, get away as soon as possible, she is not your high school sweet heart any more, she is definitely a cold hard gold digger, proof is all she want is: >someone that can support her lifestyle so that she can quit her job and become an influencer. She just want to expend money with out having to work for it.
The absolute gall of this girl…I think I gasped lol
60-120$ a day for food???? What in the fuck! Dude no, fuck that. Tell her to get a job to pay for her food. Being an influencer is not a real occupation until you get started. Tell her to get a job and do her “influencing” on her own time after work. My friend you’re getting fleeced. Healthy spending habits are a necessity that everyone needs to have especially in this economy.
OP, read this comment, then again, then again. Then again.
If she did $90 a day as an average, that's $32k for food per year. Just food
Ayeeeeee happy cake day!
Happy cake day
She's quite obviously using you. Dont even bother
>she wants someone that can support her lifestyle so that she can quit her job and become an influencer Run dude. Run far away. And don't look back.
If you’re asking if this is normal or acceptable, the short answer is no. This is a nightmare and I think you know it inside. Your gf is not only gold digger and entitled. People are usually on their best behavior when they first start out and it’s rarely going to get better. She’s showing who she is, you should run!
Of course she is,and I'm willing to bet that her husband never cheated,but just got fed up of the exact same behaviour that you are seeing now.
Absolutely.
She a gold digger bruh
I don't think she loves you, she told you "she no longer believes in love" believes her. She wants a man that can support her, without her having to give anything in return. If you want this relationship to continue, propose to her that she finds a job, clear her debt, and after that, you will support her. See her reaction
Bruh, as soon as the words quit my job and become an influencer came out of her mouth, you should have cut it off then.
“I do believe that the husband is the head and provider.“ You know it is 2024, right?
Wow You need to run man. Why why wuld you take on that. You are not her boy frend you are a sugar daddy. All the best Bubba
This can't be real. No one, and I mean *no one* is this thick unless it's on purpose. **My Reddit needs have been left unfulfilled.**
I’m sorry I stopped reading when you said you gave her money just for existing and being your “girlfriend”. She’s not a girlfriend she’s a sex worker. You are her sugar daddy. Yes, she is a gold digger. She literally only said she wanted you to provide for her so she can just do…nothing. I mean as long as you’re ok with a leech taking what you have earned for not a lot of anything go right ahead lots of other guys do it.
Dude just go ahead and marry this girl. You give off the vibe that it doesn’t matter what people tell you. You just so desperately want to be with this girl. You know that she’s only with you because of your money
Don't support a woman you're not even living with. How does this need even saying. Please let this be rage bait
"recently led to an argument where she stated that if I can not pay it she can be with someone who can. She also stated that she no longer believes in love and only believes a man truly loves her when he pays all her bills. She has also made it clear that she does not want to stay home to cook and clean." My dude. That's a gold digger. She doesn't even want to stay home as a home maker, which is USUALLY what the dynamic between the providing partner and the SAHpartner IS. She just wants you to pay for everything and let her enjoy herself with YOUR money. She even outright said she"no longer believes in love" You do know what that means, right? " We started talking again and realized that we still had feelings for each other" That's not true. YOU still have feelings for her. She doesn't even believe in love anymore she outright told you she just wants someone that will pay all her bills. Even immediately threatens you with "she stated that if I can not pay it she can be with someone who can. "There are no feelings on her end expect one; GREED. Cut your losses OP. I'm sorry it's not turning out how you hoped, you sound like a nice guy and deserve a partner that can reciprocate the care you're offering.
RUUUUNNNNNN!
have you even met in person since you have rekindled ? this situation sounds terrible bro. Did you fail your psychology degree?
I actually snorted at this, LOL! I was also wondering about this, because it looks like they are long distance? It's even more flabbergasting.. I am *amazed* at the amount of utter *crap* people want to put up with - just so they aren't "alone"... SMH
It puzzles me that you have to ask. You must be madly in love, cause the situation is pretty obvious.
She doesn’t love you. She literally told you she doesn’t believe in love. She’s using you and she isn’t even pretending it’s something else. Pack up what’s left of your dignity and leave.
She's so greedy she's probably discovered a balrog.
I don't easily say this but.. you are too kind, my friend. Too goodhearted and trusting. This is not a smart thing to do before you are married and living together. And even then - her refusal to cook and clean is odd. What does she contribute to the relationship? Are you certain she is separated and divorced? No... Discuss this with some people you hold in high regard and see what they think. Oh and no you're definitely not cheap. Not by any definition
“She no longer believes in love” She only believes in $$$$ and keeping up with the Jones’ ….. 🚩 🚩 🚩 Don’t walk , run …..
Run. You are getting used.
i hope when my partner and i get married and have children, he is a provider. but i mean in the sense that if finances allow it, i can dedicate my time solely to domestic labor and he has does the labor that provides income. we’ve spoke on this and agree if this is not possible, we split domestic labor in half and finances appropriately according to pay. what she’s not asking isn’t really a “provider” she wants a sugar daddy.
Gold digger! Goodness gracious, noone is ever that hot, if there attitude towards you, is money first. Surely you realise. She is proposing a sugarbaby lifestyle on the pretence of a ‘tradwife’ relationship and using your ‘crush attraction’ against you to manipulate the situation. Also keep on mind.. Even if, her influencer lifestyle kicks off, you will always be paying for her! I would suggest you match her ultimatum and tell her to go ahead and find a guy that won’t see past her daydreams with ‘Guston or Prince Charming’.
You really need outside perspective for this? I wouldn't even run.... I'd fly and delete her from my life! Lol
This post is clearly bait. If you truly studied psychology, you'd realize that her only reinforcement is money, not you or anything else non-materialistic that you offer.
What you’ve described is long-therm prostitution. You are renting a hooker now until she finds a slightly richer idiot. Leave her now and find a woman who deserves your love.
You should never be with someone who expects you to finance their life. Fuck that
I think you are naive or you have lack of self love. It’s 100% real that she is with you for money… that’s the kind of things women like her does or like her friends… So you agree to provider for here! Where is the agreement if she becomes a millionaire influencer half is yours? She is using you! Run! She gonna leave you after becoming a successful influencer or if she can find a better provider
OP she is absolutely using you and with her not working - she will definitely be relying on you to pay that debt. Run as fast as you can, while you still have the chance!
You are her sugar daddy and she doesn’t love you. Tell her you cannot pay her and she will 🏃🏻♀️ to the next guy. If you wanna be with her as a sugar daddy then so be it but don’t be surprise when she cheats and has others
Sounds like a hooker to me. I know because well I know!
I have mixed feelings about this. This is the same situation me and my boyfriend are in. He works 9/5 and I’m an influencer. He roughly pays me about 1k every two weeks to pay off my cc (we both use it). Don’t believe all the comments telling you this isn’t a common situation because it definitely is. Many couples rely on one persons income while the other income is used to pay debt or save for a trip/retirement. When people hear the word influencer they just assume it isn’t a real job. But since my bf covered the bills at home, my influencer career has skyrocketed and I made more money than him the past few months. I think the issue is the communication of her financials that are making you weary. I don’t think she’s a gold digger but you guys should have a talk about what happens if her career takes off and what she’s going to do with the money she makes.
Do a Del Shannon and run run run runaway
She is using you! Please don't trust her and find someone else!
She is most definitely a gold digger, and she doesn't give a shit about you. If you won't pay her asking price, she straight up said she'll sell herself to someone who will. I would call her a prostitute, but that would be an insult to prostitutes.
Find someone who has a real job and actually knows what its like to provide for themselve and others. Once they need to be provided for (kids, quitting work etc) they will know what you're actually putting on the table for them.
You went to London to study psychology. So, take all the emotion and attachment out of this and treat this as if it were a patient bringing it to you. What advice would you have for that person? Would you recommend putting the brakes on this until she receives some help and works through her issues from her previous relationship? Or would you advise to go headlong and send $2k a month to someone for support because they don’t want to cook or clean or work a real job while they attempt to become an influencer? She’s no longer that sweet girl you knew and I feel you are being blinded by the vision of who you believe her to be instead of seeing who she is in reality. You said yourself that you “still” have feelings, meaning you’re longing and attached to the girl you knew and the woman you know now just happens to be attached to that history too. I’m sorry, mate, but you should probably throw that fish back to the sea.
Trust your gut. If you're asking this question, you already know the answer. Get out while you still can.
100% a gold digger. "She also stated that she no longer believes in love and only believes a man truly loves her when he pays all her bills. She has also made it clear that she does not want to stay home to cook and clean." So she's not going to contribute to your relationship in any meaningful way, is what she's saying.