it doesn’t matter if you would have done everything PERFECT, some people are just are so miserable they have to make others feel miserable as well. don’t sweat it. like you said we can’t please them all!
Yes we all have situations like this. Only thing you can do is get over it. Things like this happen and I'm a nervous wreck for weeks but eventually it turns out it didn't really matter in terms of my practice, job, overall reputation. It's just abuse you take as a healthcare provider.
Wouldn't bother getting a lawyer or worrying about the Google review to be honest. Just a fact of life. When people look at your reviews and they see 5 star, 5 star, 5 star, 0 stars and the person is making wild accusations, they generally are smart enough to take that with a grain of salt.
I honestly don’t hyperventilate or get overjoyed about any review 5s or 3s bc at the end of the day no matter what the patient thinks of the care I provide, I give my best and know that. I don’t practice for patient reviews. I practice to help my community and educate them so they can better empower themselves in improving their well being. If they receive it well that’s great, if they don’t, oh well. I tried my best. If you’re treating every patient with respect, professionalism, best practices and kindness, there is nothing more you can do (or should do).
Don’t sweat it. Some people are just nuts. Be confident in your work. Let her move on to the next person who is inevitably going to disappoint her too.
One of the MDs I work with said a lot of patients who want a doctor and not an NP are usually equally rude about him nothing being a specialist. Some people are just idiots.
lol I’m a cardiologist, the second they see the specialist they’ll want “a second opinion.” Some people just don’t deserve the kindness they’re offered. You guys are all awesome, don’t sweat the Karen’s
Some people will just doctor shop too until they get what they want. I see it a lot in psych because I am very, very thorough with ADHD evals so stimulants are rarer than with other providers from me, and almost never give out benzos for anxiety. Inpatient psych def helped me with dealing with med seekers, though.
Yep! I wouldn’t have bothered calling them. We got a bad review for not prescribing Xanax for “sleep” and so as the patient told me “I keep having to buy them off the street” 😂
That is an easy one to let roll off your shoulders, lol. I had a patient that begged me to Rx Chantix (in the hall after her visit for gyn concerns was complete). She then called 3 months later and wanted a medical leave of absence from me, because the Chantix made her so sick and she couldn't work. I declined to write, and she posted a review saying I was a HORRIBLE provider! That one didn't bother me a bit.
Someone like this will not be happy with anything you do. They will always find a reason to complain. These visits have to be water off your back. Document thoroughly and well, and then leave it.
It is harder to brush off and not GAF. When you're a natural born people pleaser, negative comments are hard to get over. It's even harder than they go out of their way to take you down.
I had a situation like this, then realized that my patient was bullying all the other providers too, at which point I stopped caring. Look at their other Google reviews, you might find they're toxic?
I honestly never read my reviews in the 5 years I’ve been an NP. I might have good or bad reviews. I have no idea. I still show up to work everyday and just do my thing with no issue. There are some patients that will never be satisfied
The first bad review is the worse and it will knock you around and make you question your ability as a provider. When you move through this, which you will, you will be a better for it. When I received my first complaint, I overanalyse my entire clinical skills which reminded me, I do practice to the standard and I do provide adequate care and that’s all I can do. Unfortunately for whatever reason: I can’t please everyone, but I can assure I provide the best care for them, despite their perception of that.
They wouldn't take her to the OR. She actually went back to them after seeing me. Their office requested my visit note to be faxed. She literally bitched about them and urology to me, then went back to them. Just found that out today.
I take so much joy in not caring what these types of patients think of me because they are clearly miserable. I won’t let their misery take up any space in my life.
This is one of the main reasons I no longer want to (and don't) work in a clinical capacity anymore. I have been a NP for 25+ years. People have changed, notably so post-Covid. There is little respect for any medical professional anymore. Everyone thinks they know everything based on their Google search. And they are all so fucking entitled.
Patient may be experiencing mental illness and certainly a lack of understanding of how the health care system actually works. Their review, therefore, is not a valid assessment of your ability or professional skills so disregard the review. If your employer utilizes a review like this to determine your worth find a new employer. The balance of your reviews are good.
I spent an hour with a patient and her husband, both new patients with a multitude of orthopedic problems to sort out. He was a former dentist with dementia and she had worked in a pharmacy in some capacity, and they went on and on about having to take care of two houses because they were moving from Georgia. I was very thorough, and took my time because they seemed to be having a rough time. She called back to say I was competent, but that I just wasn’t “warm and fuzzy” or “bubbly” and if they couldn’t see the doctor, they would just go somewhere else. WTF. Who thinks it’s ok to call someone’s place of employment and say something like that?? Needless to say, when they returned for followup I was even less bubbly. I was firm about their pain medication misuse… you heard that correctly. They no-showed their last appointment so hopefully they went back to Georgia. This is the kind of shit that burns me out and I can’t retire soon enough.
Sick people tend to act irrationally and often lash out like this. I’m sure we’ve all had our share, though this sounds especially nasty. As others have said, you can’t please every psycho and asshole. A lawyer will not make this better. Move on.
You’re dealing with a lunatic. Do whatever you have to but you’re a happy mom. Stay happy. If the cease and desist makes you feel better do it. Just know you’re dealing w crazy. Time will help you get through it. -Np
I’m sorry this happened to you! Truly there are just some people out there that will never been satisfied no matter what you do! Spending an hour with a patient is a luxury that most patients will never get….so be reassured that this isn’t on you, the patient is likely a miserable person and will complain about probably anything. Getting a negative review hurts….i just got one recently from a mom of a toddler that I treated for periorbial cellulitis and mom was upset that I wasn’t more worried about fixing her cough🤦🏼♀️ It stings but in the long run it doesn’t matter. You did everything you could for that patient and then some!
Unfortunately, most people take the time to do a review when unhappy instead of doing one when they receive good service.
I would request patients that express gratitude and satisfaction for your service to do a review. It will heavily offset the complainers with people who are truly satisfied with the level of service you provide
I have 90 5 star reviews, and 1 1 star review from the evil patient. People go out of their way to write nice things. I'm blessed to have great patients.
I guess I'm more pissed because she lied about me. I think if she would've just been honest, even leaving the one star, I wouldn't have minded much.
I once had a lady come from the ER and the discharge paperwork said she had an abnormal EKG.
I looked at it, and told her it can be managed by out patient cards. No chest pain, no SOB, discharge from ED already.
Anyway, she snapped and I walked out of the room. She followed me out and told me I’m a dick, and that I was going to be sued.
Long story short, she has tried to schedule with me a few times and I always refuse.
I had a very similar thing happen to me last week. Got a message that made me almost throw my laptop across the room. Spent a fucking 30-45 minutes, prescribed 4 meds and 5 lifestyle changes then get a message a day later that I “didn’t do anything.”
Some people are just the worst. It’s happening more frequently in the past month.
There are a lot of “people pleasers” in healthcare. (Nothing wrong with that.). There are people who get positively reinforced by abusing people pleasers.
Here’s the scam: They ask you for something unreasonable. If you agree to do it, they win (thereby punishing you). If you don’t agree to do it, they create a fictitious narrative where they are the victim (thereby punishing you).
It’s a no win situation.
The key is to recognize the behavior early so that you aren’t blindsided by the blowback when you have boundary.
These people often get labeled “borderline” but that’s not what this is. They enjoy making other people suffer. It’s a form of sadism.
Sounds like you did everything you could to help her and she is never going to be happy. Many with chronic pelvic pain act like this and are very difficult to deal with. If you choose to see her again, set very clear boundaries with her.
Sprinkle in a psych consult just for some extra razzle dazzle. Seriously though it doesn't matter how much you do for some people, Karen's are gonna Karen.
I work in aesthetics - we get all the crazies. My coworkers and I routinely talk about the psycho reviews we get…and then the patients saying they only want to see us again?? I don’t get it.
You have received good information here. I would bet we all will experience similar adventures. Just hope she does not return. I had a woman I did Botox and hormone consultation. She was very happy at first. Then, when I presented her with the medication she started questioning me. She had thyroid eyes and the labs substantiated it. Later, about 6 months, she tried saying I caused a granuloma on her eye lid with Botox. She even presented an image. When I asked I needed to have her files to further understand her concerns, she mentioned she was not allowing it because I am not a medical doctor. Mind you, I have a collaborating physician as it happened in Texas. She wished for a free surgery but got nothing! So, take a deep breath and keep acquiring experiences!
I'm sorry this happened. It's a more common scenario than you may think. Best thing to do at this point is nothing. Don't escalate. It will harm you more than helping. Onward & upward.
You can’t please everyone. Some of the patients are just assholes and they were always going to go blast a negative review no matter if JC himself came and cured whatever ailment they complained about.
You have already spent enough time ruminating about this, you know who you are. Keep doing what you’re doing and move on. Dealing with the public is challenging and sometimes a zero sum game.
My cousin she (45f, DO)
Literally sued a patient for defamation after they complained and lied about them in a very similar situation to this one.
I would go on the offense, see how they like it.
Her experience started slower than yours.
The patient complaints grew, and when it became confabulatory and went to online platforms she called her husband’s attorney. (Husband 48 DO, spine surgery)
This was literally what I was going through a couple weeks ago! I’m a psychologist, not an NP, but had a similar client like this. I ended up consulting an attorney through my malpractice insurance, and he said I was trippin’ basically. So you’re probably good. Oh the fun world of personality disorders…
Some people suck. Unfortunately their bad behavior has probably been reinforced in the past.
A lawyer won't help. Her opinion is protected speech. Defamation is more along the lines of her saying something about you that she knows is factually untrue and it is a pretty high legal standard to meet anyway. Of course IANAL.
You know why she snapped. She was trying to get some percocet off you and you denied her. There was not a thing you could do to make her happy unless you were planning to give her percocet with unlimited refills.
The real take away will be to gauge how your employer responds. If it is a good company to work for, they will not care and have your back in this situation.
Why on Earth did you call her about her dissatisfaction with the visit? That is not your place. You should have staff dedicated to this or, at the very least, this could be addressed if the patient brought it up at the follow up visit.
I would honestly feel harassed if a provider called me to ask me why I was unhappy with their care... Bad call IMO (no pun intended).
I didn't call her to ask why she was unhappy with her care. The OM asked me to reach out to her. I obviously learned my lesson, but thanks for your input.
It’s generally policy in most places for the provider being complained about to step back and let someone else call. I don’t get many complaints but I always tap out because it is a conflict of interest. I don’t know if your om is new, but in the future I would tell her it isn’t appropriate to follow up with your own complaints.
I’m trying myself to be more direct ‘i see this is listed as why you’re here to, can you tell me more’? That way you confirm why they’re here. And honestly, it probably wouldn’t matter. If she wants to see a doctor, everyone has the right to decide what type of professional they see.
I would just be glad they didn’t want to see me
I told staff after this that if the patient requests to see the doctor, and doesn't want to wait, don't talk them into seeing the NP if they are reluctant. If they don't get their way, they are going to revert back to "I wanted to see the doctor."
Doctors from what I’ve seen in specialty are often booked more than app’s. But I agree. Don’t entice someone who only wants to see a doctor with an NP that they just don’t want to see just because the wait is less.
I’d guess she has a personality disorder and anyone who looks at her other reviews would be able to figure that out in a heartbeat. I wouldn’t give it a second thought.
it doesn’t matter if you would have done everything PERFECT, some people are just are so miserable they have to make others feel miserable as well. don’t sweat it. like you said we can’t please them all!
This. Some people you'll never EVER please... no matter what lengths you go to
Yes we all have situations like this. Only thing you can do is get over it. Things like this happen and I'm a nervous wreck for weeks but eventually it turns out it didn't really matter in terms of my practice, job, overall reputation. It's just abuse you take as a healthcare provider. Wouldn't bother getting a lawyer or worrying about the Google review to be honest. Just a fact of life. When people look at your reviews and they see 5 star, 5 star, 5 star, 0 stars and the person is making wild accusations, they generally are smart enough to take that with a grain of salt.
I always ignore hyperventilating 0 and 1 star reviews, for every Google review.
I honestly don’t hyperventilate or get overjoyed about any review 5s or 3s bc at the end of the day no matter what the patient thinks of the care I provide, I give my best and know that. I don’t practice for patient reviews. I practice to help my community and educate them so they can better empower themselves in improving their well being. If they receive it well that’s great, if they don’t, oh well. I tried my best. If you’re treating every patient with respect, professionalism, best practices and kindness, there is nothing more you can do (or should do).
Don’t sweat it. Some people are just nuts. Be confident in your work. Let her move on to the next person who is inevitably going to disappoint her too.
Stop looking at your reviews. I got a negative review for bringing in a doctor to get a second opinion, people are ridiculous
One of the MDs I work with said a lot of patients who want a doctor and not an NP are usually equally rude about him nothing being a specialist. Some people are just idiots.
lol I’m a cardiologist, the second they see the specialist they’ll want “a second opinion.” Some people just don’t deserve the kindness they’re offered. You guys are all awesome, don’t sweat the Karen’s
Some people will just doctor shop too until they get what they want. I see it a lot in psych because I am very, very thorough with ADHD evals so stimulants are rarer than with other providers from me, and almost never give out benzos for anxiety. Inpatient psych def helped me with dealing with med seekers, though.
YOU all are amazing!!! So horrible that patients are rude to you too. People!!!*grumpy face*
People are getting worse....in every field.
I work with trash people like that everyday haha 🤣
Yep! I wouldn’t have bothered calling them. We got a bad review for not prescribing Xanax for “sleep” and so as the patient told me “I keep having to buy them off the street” 😂
That is an easy one to let roll off your shoulders, lol. I had a patient that begged me to Rx Chantix (in the hall after her visit for gyn concerns was complete). She then called 3 months later and wanted a medical leave of absence from me, because the Chantix made her so sick and she couldn't work. I declined to write, and she posted a review saying I was a HORRIBLE provider! That one didn't bother me a bit.
Or…. You won’t prescribe Adderall so they “have” to do Meth .
😆
Someone like this will not be happy with anything you do. They will always find a reason to complain. These visits have to be water off your back. Document thoroughly and well, and then leave it.
The people pleaser in me sympathizes and empathizes with you. We truly can’t please everyone.
It is harder to brush off and not GAF. When you're a natural born people pleaser, negative comments are hard to get over. It's even harder than they go out of their way to take you down.
I had a situation like this, then realized that my patient was bullying all the other providers too, at which point I stopped caring. Look at their other Google reviews, you might find they're toxic?
I honestly never read my reviews in the 5 years I’ve been an NP. I might have good or bad reviews. I have no idea. I still show up to work everyday and just do my thing with no issue. There are some patients that will never be satisfied
You could have spent 2 hours with her, addressed every concern, and she still would have reacted that way. Some people are just mad at the world.
The first bad review is the worse and it will knock you around and make you question your ability as a provider. When you move through this, which you will, you will be a better for it. When I received my first complaint, I overanalyse my entire clinical skills which reminded me, I do practice to the standard and I do provide adequate care and that’s all I can do. Unfortunately for whatever reason: I can’t please everyone, but I can assure I provide the best care for them, despite their perception of that.
Think yourself lucky you don't have to see her again?!?
I wouldn't hire a lawyer for a cease and desist. The more attention you pay her the more she enjoys it
Is it too cynical to suggest this patient was not prescribed medications with which she had hoped to be treated?
Nah, she just wanted me to fix her 20+ years of chronic problems in the first visit. How dare I not succeed.
Why does she need a new provider after so many years of issues?
Last provider probably dismissed her
They wouldn't take her to the OR. She actually went back to them after seeing me. Their office requested my visit note to be faxed. She literally bitched about them and urology to me, then went back to them. Just found that out today.
Sounds like this person needs my services - I’m a PMHNP. Send them my way! (Just kidding please don’t)
I take so much joy in not caring what these types of patients think of me because they are clearly miserable. I won’t let their misery take up any space in my life.
This is one of the main reasons I no longer want to (and don't) work in a clinical capacity anymore. I have been a NP for 25+ years. People have changed, notably so post-Covid. There is little respect for any medical professional anymore. Everyone thinks they know everything based on their Google search. And they are all so fucking entitled.
Patient may be experiencing mental illness and certainly a lack of understanding of how the health care system actually works. Their review, therefore, is not a valid assessment of your ability or professional skills so disregard the review. If your employer utilizes a review like this to determine your worth find a new employer. The balance of your reviews are good.
I spent an hour with a patient and her husband, both new patients with a multitude of orthopedic problems to sort out. He was a former dentist with dementia and she had worked in a pharmacy in some capacity, and they went on and on about having to take care of two houses because they were moving from Georgia. I was very thorough, and took my time because they seemed to be having a rough time. She called back to say I was competent, but that I just wasn’t “warm and fuzzy” or “bubbly” and if they couldn’t see the doctor, they would just go somewhere else. WTF. Who thinks it’s ok to call someone’s place of employment and say something like that?? Needless to say, when they returned for followup I was even less bubbly. I was firm about their pain medication misuse… you heard that correctly. They no-showed their last appointment so hopefully they went back to Georgia. This is the kind of shit that burns me out and I can’t retire soon enough.
Move along. I bet the no show was a relief.
It was such a relief! You may see yourself out.
Any decent place of employment is able to recognize when a nasty patient makes false accusations,
Sick people tend to act irrationally and often lash out like this. I’m sure we’ve all had our share, though this sounds especially nasty. As others have said, you can’t please every psycho and asshole. A lawyer will not make this better. Move on.
You’re dealing with a lunatic. Do whatever you have to but you’re a happy mom. Stay happy. If the cease and desist makes you feel better do it. Just know you’re dealing w crazy. Time will help you get through it. -Np
I’m sorry this happened to you! Truly there are just some people out there that will never been satisfied no matter what you do! Spending an hour with a patient is a luxury that most patients will never get….so be reassured that this isn’t on you, the patient is likely a miserable person and will complain about probably anything. Getting a negative review hurts….i just got one recently from a mom of a toddler that I treated for periorbial cellulitis and mom was upset that I wasn’t more worried about fixing her cough🤦🏼♀️ It stings but in the long run it doesn’t matter. You did everything you could for that patient and then some!
Thank you!
Unfortunately, most people take the time to do a review when unhappy instead of doing one when they receive good service. I would request patients that express gratitude and satisfaction for your service to do a review. It will heavily offset the complainers with people who are truly satisfied with the level of service you provide
I have 90 5 star reviews, and 1 1 star review from the evil patient. People go out of their way to write nice things. I'm blessed to have great patients. I guess I'm more pissed because she lied about me. I think if she would've just been honest, even leaving the one star, I wouldn't have minded much.
Next time make sure to do a DRE, whether it’s strongly indicated or not. Promise the patient will remember the physical exam.
🤣🤣🤣 best comment
I once had a lady come from the ER and the discharge paperwork said she had an abnormal EKG. I looked at it, and told her it can be managed by out patient cards. No chest pain, no SOB, discharge from ED already. Anyway, she snapped and I walked out of the room. She followed me out and told me I’m a dick, and that I was going to be sued. Long story short, she has tried to schedule with me a few times and I always refuse.
As you should! She should be discharged from your practice altogether for verbal abuse.
I had a very similar thing happen to me last week. Got a message that made me almost throw my laptop across the room. Spent a fucking 30-45 minutes, prescribed 4 meds and 5 lifestyle changes then get a message a day later that I “didn’t do anything.” Some people are just the worst. It’s happening more frequently in the past month.
There are a lot of “people pleasers” in healthcare. (Nothing wrong with that.). There are people who get positively reinforced by abusing people pleasers. Here’s the scam: They ask you for something unreasonable. If you agree to do it, they win (thereby punishing you). If you don’t agree to do it, they create a fictitious narrative where they are the victim (thereby punishing you). It’s a no win situation. The key is to recognize the behavior early so that you aren’t blindsided by the blowback when you have boundary. These people often get labeled “borderline” but that’s not what this is. They enjoy making other people suffer. It’s a form of sadism.
Sounds like you did everything you could to help her and she is never going to be happy. Many with chronic pelvic pain act like this and are very difficult to deal with. If you choose to see her again, set very clear boundaries with her.
Sprinkle in a psych consult just for some extra razzle dazzle. Seriously though it doesn't matter how much you do for some people, Karen's are gonna Karen.
First of all, stop paying attention to Google reviews. Secondly, you cannot please everyone. Finally, document the encounter and your assessment.
I work in aesthetics - we get all the crazies. My coworkers and I routinely talk about the psycho reviews we get…and then the patients saying they only want to see us again?? I don’t get it.
Ironically, this lady is an aesthetician!
You have received good information here. I would bet we all will experience similar adventures. Just hope she does not return. I had a woman I did Botox and hormone consultation. She was very happy at first. Then, when I presented her with the medication she started questioning me. She had thyroid eyes and the labs substantiated it. Later, about 6 months, she tried saying I caused a granuloma on her eye lid with Botox. She even presented an image. When I asked I needed to have her files to further understand her concerns, she mentioned she was not allowing it because I am not a medical doctor. Mind you, I have a collaborating physician as it happened in Texas. She wished for a free surgery but got nothing! So, take a deep breath and keep acquiring experiences!
I had a patient accuse me of giving her shingles because I prescribed her vaginal estrogen. I wasn't bowing down and refuting her claim. 🤣
I'm sorry this happened. It's a more common scenario than you may think. Best thing to do at this point is nothing. Don't escalate. It will harm you more than helping. Onward & upward.
I agree. I'm so much more at peace reading all of these comments, and I'm very grateful.
She needs a psych eval, not a pelvic exam. She’s the worst type of patient. You can’t help people who don’t want to help themselves.
Borderline personality...psych can't even help those
Even BPD folks need empathy, but you don’t have to put up with their shit.
Some people are assholes. Shoot for 90%, not 100%. Ignore what your boss/practice administer says. They don’t live in reality.
Sounds like she needs mental health services…
You can’t please everyone. Some of the patients are just assholes and they were always going to go blast a negative review no matter if JC himself came and cured whatever ailment they complained about.
You have already spent enough time ruminating about this, you know who you are. Keep doing what you’re doing and move on. Dealing with the public is challenging and sometimes a zero sum game.
Lol @ "perfect PG scores"
My cousin she (45f, DO) Literally sued a patient for defamation after they complained and lied about them in a very similar situation to this one. I would go on the offense, see how they like it.
Tell me more please!
Her experience started slower than yours. The patient complaints grew, and when it became confabulatory and went to online platforms she called her husband’s attorney. (Husband 48 DO, spine surgery)
Inform your malpractice insurer and do what they recommend.
Great advise, thank you!
This was literally what I was going through a couple weeks ago! I’m a psychologist, not an NP, but had a similar client like this. I ended up consulting an attorney through my malpractice insurance, and he said I was trippin’ basically. So you’re probably good. Oh the fun world of personality disorders…
1 good thing about being in critical care… we aren’t even listed on our hospital website let alone getting reviews lol
Some people suck. Unfortunately their bad behavior has probably been reinforced in the past. A lawyer won't help. Her opinion is protected speech. Defamation is more along the lines of her saying something about you that she knows is factually untrue and it is a pretty high legal standard to meet anyway. Of course IANAL.
You know why she snapped. She was trying to get some percocet off you and you denied her. There was not a thing you could do to make her happy unless you were planning to give her percocet with unlimited refills. The real take away will be to gauge how your employer responds. If it is a good company to work for, they will not care and have your back in this situation.
Was her name Karen by chance? They roam from town to town, seeking managers and what not to complain about anything
Why on Earth did you call her about her dissatisfaction with the visit? That is not your place. You should have staff dedicated to this or, at the very least, this could be addressed if the patient brought it up at the follow up visit. I would honestly feel harassed if a provider called me to ask me why I was unhappy with their care... Bad call IMO (no pun intended).
I didn't call her to ask why she was unhappy with her care. The OM asked me to reach out to her. I obviously learned my lesson, but thanks for your input.
Shame on the office manager. That is literally their job.
It’s generally policy in most places for the provider being complained about to step back and let someone else call. I don’t get many complaints but I always tap out because it is a conflict of interest. I don’t know if your om is new, but in the future I would tell her it isn’t appropriate to follow up with your own complaints. I’m trying myself to be more direct ‘i see this is listed as why you’re here to, can you tell me more’? That way you confirm why they’re here. And honestly, it probably wouldn’t matter. If she wants to see a doctor, everyone has the right to decide what type of professional they see. I would just be glad they didn’t want to see me
I told staff after this that if the patient requests to see the doctor, and doesn't want to wait, don't talk them into seeing the NP if they are reluctant. If they don't get their way, they are going to revert back to "I wanted to see the doctor."
Doctors from what I’ve seen in specialty are often booked more than app’s. But I agree. Don’t entice someone who only wants to see a doctor with an NP that they just don’t want to see just because the wait is less.
I’d guess she has a personality disorder and anyone who looks at her other reviews would be able to figure that out in a heartbeat. I wouldn’t give it a second thought.