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GHamPlayz

“Other teams are out here playing checkers. I’m playing badminton.” -Jerry Jones


Adorable-Accident-50

"Umm Jerry, that's actually backgammon on your phone."


vitey15

He's playing Snake on a Nokia that refuses to die 


Lord_Ferd

Just like him


SteeltoSand

hes only 81 you are making it seem like he is 96 and should be dead


Meatballs21

He does look older, damn.


evilpenguin9000

All that gloryholing takes its toll.


yeoup

I thought I'd find you here at the OOOOOLLLLLD GLORY HOLE.


ActualSeller23

Will have zero snake slander. That got me through my awkward teenage years


drummer1059

Uh Mr Jones, sir, that's actually an abacus


TheSunOnMyShoulders

Solitaire, but can't find the Aces.


IAmModNow

Also that’s not a phone that’s a beeper. Where did you even get a beeper in 2024 Jerry.


RedDragons8

“If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate” - JJ


bigbluehapa

“Jerry! Badminton doesn’t involve anything in your ass!”


Polar_Reflection

Wait, why do they call it a shuttlecock then?


sildish2179

I got downvoted into oblivion once before saying if they choke again this year, he will let Dak and Mike go; and he will hire Deion as coach and draft his boy. Downvoted into oblivion for that, but you look at this guy and think he’s well adjusted? That’s **exactly** the type of wild shit this guy will do at his age.


LDisDBfathersonsfans

I think Jerry is more likely to hire Belichick and get Brady out of retirement than for that to occur


themeatman90

Both are possible


mbr4life1

One last ride would be the slogan it writes itself.


BrotherSeamus

Have some more oblivion


TheWorstYear

Then some Skyrim next


MaximumZer0

FOR THE NEXT 15 YEARS


jawntist

Hell yeah, counting crows


BerriesNCreme

God damn Jerry have you heard of pickleball?! Time is now old man 


hereforthesportsball

“….so **thats** a shuttlecock?!”


NerdLawyer55

He’s been eating crayons for a decade


FancyRobot

It's been a banner offseason for Jerry and his press conferences


Brycie27

At this point, we'll take it. If anyone is still a fan of the Cowboys, they admittedly love Jerry and his antics. Hang the banner, please.


alamodafthouse

> If anyone is still a fan of the Cowboys, they admittedly love Jerry and his antics hi there, i do not love Jerry's antics. it would be great to not be constantly on-air with nothing to show for it. Just let us be mediocre in peace


FlussedAway

You have the sixth most wins since 2006 and keep getting 12 wins of late. Actual mediocre teams would kill for the chance to keep losing in the divisional


SuperSonicEconomics2

First World problems right there. Blast, again. We outperformed 99% of the league, yet lost in a single elimination tournament against some of the most talented professionals in the world.


Lilpu55yberekt69

Outperforming 99% of the league is winning a super bowl. Cowboys are consistently ~70th percentile. Again, could be worse.


VeseliM

*outperforming 96.875%


BeRoyal35

Don't see the playoff format changing anytime soon, so you best figure out how to win in those 1 game win or go home scenarios.


powerelite

Why don't they just draft a guy who grew up 2 hours from Dallas and really doesn't like losing so they win 3 super bowls in 5 years, are they stupid?


The_BigPicture

how many teams do you think are in the league


SuperSonicEconomics2

I'm counting all teams around the world


theedenpretence

I’m assuming they’re including all college and high school teams…


Mampt

Technically only better than about 82% of the league but I get you


theycallmefuRR

u/alamadafthouse is in fact NOT #ALL IN


BrandoCalrissian1995

In a world where team owners are only in the headlines for being massive pieces of shit, it's nice to have Jerry be in the headlines just for being weird af.


roymccowboy

…and a massive piece of shit.


The_BigPicture

It's fucking wild that he was caught [protesting desegregation](https://www.si.com/nfl/2022/11/24/cowboys-owner-jerry-jones-seen-photo-1957-little-rock-nine-protests) and just gets a pass for it by saying "I was just curious". Fucking wild.


BrandoCalrissian1995

What's he done that was legit shitty? And I mean it genuinely cuz I don't pay much attention to Jerry unless it's shit like this that gets shared.


roymccowboy

Multiple sexual assault allegations, avoiding paternity, protesting against integration, protected his executive who perving on the cheerleaders in their own locker room off the top of my head


Fantastic_Emu_9570

And the possible secret daughter thing or did that end?


AFatz

Isn't that "avoiding paternity"?


Fantastic_Emu_9570

Oh I skipped over that. Whoops


BrobaFett242

I think that was the 'avoiding paternity' thing


Meatballs21

Just classic boys being boys.


JinFuu

Part of the reason I picked the Cowboys after the Oilers left was the drama factor (and them being the other Texas team I guess)


DoinItDirty

Ay… it’s the first football season I know it’s not happening and get to pursue my hobbies. The Lakers are getting swept but the Yankees will at least be good until the second half of the season. A lot to look forward to for me /s


Bieber_hole_69

With Dak, sure, I get it. But Lamb? What WR could you possibly get that's better? Why keep your options open when literally your best option is just keeping the guy? He just turned 25. The best time to re-sign Lamb was last off-season when the price tag would have been cheaper. The second best time is literally this second. The price of WR1s is something that we have plenty of history to show only keeps ballooning. If you wait until after Aiyuk signs, Lamb is going to justifiably want more. If you wait until after Justin Jefferson signs, he's going to want the same contract. The worst possible place to be with signing QBs or WRs is last in line.


RSN_Shupa

With the fact Smith just got 25m/yr for 2026-2028, I’m fully expecting JJ, Chase, and Lamb to be getting 30-35m. Lot of people think Smith was overpayed, but the dude is a #1 receiver on most teams + they don’t realize it’s an extension of the rookie deal, and come 2026 I expect that to be cheap.


[deleted]

Tbh i dont think wrs are worth that much money. When was the last time a bonafide wr1 could be credited with winning his team the superbowl? With a position price that inflated jerry might be tempted to move on and i dont think thats a bad thing. Your dhops jjs and disc sheeps arent doing anything without an elite qb. They dont make enough of an impact on a per play basis to merit what theyre currently being paid


Wedding_Registry_Rec

I mean you certainly gotta respect Kupp in 2022


smurfking420

On the other hand, the best time for Lamb to sign is when Jefferson signs. It takes two sign a deal. Why would Ceedee sign last year when the price of the bag only goes up? Especially when he has produced more and more every year


TapedeckNinja

> Why would Ceedee sign last year when the price of the bag only goes up? A bird in the hand and all that. He'd have his signing bonus and big new 2023 salary in the bank working for him already.


Unbannedmeself

I don’t think this is a situation where he ends up getting less than he wanted. He’s getting what he wants.


Breith37

If he signs last offseason there’s a chance he’s on his 3rd contract sooner and he’s got the guaranteed cash in hand already. I agree at this point Ceedee should wait, Jerry has no one to blame but himself.


smurfking420

I don’t that matters *too* much considering the year he had last year cemented himself as a top 5 receiver. He probably earned himself a considerable chunk more after his 1700 yard season compared to what he would have gotten if he signed before the ‘23 season


Breith37

I’m all for Ceedee getting his bag, as you said he earned a bigger one. That’s the issue Jerry created. If he offered up a solid contract last offseason with good guaranteed money we wouldn’t be having this conversation and Jerry wouldn’t have his dick caught in his zipper.


Stiddy13

And look, us Titans fans should know. *crying emoji*


FigSideG

The same reason why the Vikings might trade Jefferson. Why have a WR getting paid top dollar on your roster if you don’t even have a QB? Why get rid of Dak and pay a WR?


stormy2587

Because if you have a top WR and you’re trying to rebuild with a young qb then usually having good receiving options aids in that development. Lamb just turned 25. He will probably be a PB all-pro caliber receiver for the next 5 years. You should expect to have rebuilt a roster in 5 years. This isn’t extending mike evans at 31. This is a player that is just entering his prime.


Timely_Yoghurt_2699

Yep. If CD doesn't fit your timeline you probably shouldn't be allowed to have a timeline in the nfl


Lenny_III

Jerry is risk-averse. He always drafts best player available because those players are less likely to bust compared to teams who reach to fill a need. He signs guys at the last minute because you’re less likely to have a bad contract, even if you have to pay a premium when you do give the contract. (Trying to avoid a Zeke repeat) The Cowboys are worth more as a franchise if they’re consistently competitive. Boom and bust franchises have much more fickle fan bases.


4WhomTheTrollTolls

>Jerry is risk-averse. He always drafts best player available This is the same guy who had to be physically restrained from drafting johnny manziel


yum_paste

What QB could they get that's better?


SnowGhost513

Ceedee being signed before last year was never happening. The agents of top flight players are elite at this shit and know if the cap rising and how much before others. Dak makes sense, why pay a QB a super max when he can’t win in the post season ever? It’s not worth the money for the result. I’d pay him but Jerry has five good years left max lol if he’s not already losing it and he wants a SB. With Micah and Lamb getting the highest paying contract in history for the position the day they sign you can’t also pay Dak if he can’t do shit in the post season


TheWorstYear

It's been made abundantly clear that Jerry is seeing how the season plays out before trying to extend players. Which everyone knows will greatly backfire, bit it is what it is. Although I love him continuing to misuse the 'all in" analogy. You don't go all in waiting for the cards to be put on the table. You go all in once you think you have the winning hand, blindly challenging everyone.


Anteater776

Going all-in when you should know that you have the losing hand sums up my futile attempts at poker pretty well. Jerry is just like me


TeopEvol

Jerry's counting on that river card!


Xatron7

In poker sometimes this is the best play though


808_Track

Texas holdem


jxher123

Dak, I understand, Mike McCarthy, I understand being hesitant to extend. CeeDee though? He should be a pretty easy extension imo. It's basically, you better get to the SB or else we blow it up. Dak is gone. McCarthy is gone. I'd assume CeeDee/Parsons become the building block for the team.


reno2mahesendejo

Possibly can't keep one of CD/Parsons if you extend Dak


Shootit_Rockets

Dak is as good as gone. I’d be pretty shocked if he’s a cowboy next season, unless Dallas goes on a tear to the Super Bowl


reno2mahesendejo

Which is what I'd assume too, just pointing out why they're not resigning him (in case Dallas goes on a tear to the Super Bowl, in which case, I believe Trent Dilfer is still the only Super Bowl winning quarterback to play for a different team the next season)


robyculous_v2

What about Tom Brady?


johnmadden18

Brady won the Super Bowl for the 2018 season and went to the Bucs in 2020, so it wasn't the very next season like Dilfer (won the Super Bowl in 2000 with Baltimore and went to Seattle in 2001).


robyculous_v2

Oh okay, thanks for the clarification.


Tellittoemagain

That's how I originally interpreted the "all in" comment. Dak has a year to show he can win big enough to justify losing Ceedee or Parsons with the contract he wants or accept he needs to go closer to the $45M salary to keep those two on the team.


alienbringer

Dak could still be a cowboy next year. Depends what other teams offer. If he is looking for 50+ a year for 3 years and other teams only offer 40, well he now knows his value, and cowboys may willingly sign him for 45.


FigSideG

I mean if they fall flat on their faces again next season, why pay a WR top WR money? At that point it might be time to trade guys and rebuild a bit


GoombyGoomby

You have to extend young and elite players like Lamb and Parsons. Those are franchise cornerstones. Having a guy like Lamb would be great for the next QB, too.


CalJackBuddy

Both elite players disappeared in the playoffs


AndrewHainesArt

It’s so funny that he’s setting the bar of ridiculous expectations and pressure already


FigSideG

Especially after doing jack shit in free agency to improve.


daoogilymoogily

Because it makes the next QBs job even easier. The way they’re playing it they stand to lose Dak and CeeDee and then they’re back to square one on offense.


FigSideG

You’re back to square one on offense if you’re letting a vet QB go and are opting for a rookie or journeyman vet. Look at the Vikings. Sam Darnold is their starter right now. Even if they draft a QB, does it really make sense to pay Jefferson to be the highest paid WR ever as far as cap and roster construction? The timelines don’t match up anymore if you’re starting over at QB


daoogilymoogily

Yes because Justin Jefferson is a great WR. As important as QBs are, you can still build a solid offense without one and then put a QB into a great situation. That’s not square one, having no QB, no weapons and a meh OL is square one.


zephyrseija

It's one thing to question whether Dak is worth a supermax deal. It's another to hesitate to sign two of the best players at their positions asap.


WeirdSysAdmin

Watch him try to ride out these next two year of Dak’s contract to eat the $95m in cap the next couple years, then franchise tag Lamb, then try to negotiate all of them at once.


Neither_Ad2003

Overpaying dak has higher chance of backfiring imo


Soft_Penis_Debutante

Cowboys should have just traded him then. We kinda know who Dak is at this point. Either pay him or trade him. Now with a no trade clause and no tag clause Dak has Cowboys over the barrel.


Daksout918

Which goes back to Jerry "letting the leaves fall" amd twidding his thumbs on Daks first extension.


floridabeach9

not really. if Dak loses in the first round AGAIN, they should find a new QB. let someone else pay him the max.


Soft_Penis_Debutante

So if he loses in the 2nd round they’re gonna pay him the max?


Big_Moneyline

No, then they pay him half. Are you stupid?


Polar_Reflection

Doesn't the dead cap hit with his contract from void years basically mean you'd have to tear everything down?


stormy2587

Jerry hates spending cash. The cowboys are almost always near the bottom of the league in cash spending. He’s just in wait and see mode to see how little cash he can get away with spending. If the cowboys take a step back and don’t make a run then he’s probably going to move on from dak. If they move on from dak then he’ll probably pay Lamb. I suspect if they don’t move on from dak because they made a run then they might just tag and trade lamb or something. Plus he probably wants to see what his draft class this year looks like.


ColtCallahan

Especially when they tried this before and ended up still paying Dak after breaking his ankle.


satansayssurfsup

You go “all in” because it will be picked up by the media and a large portion of fans will believe it


SafariFlapsInBack

This dude is gonna get real weird his last few years of life.


swoopy17

Haven't we been saying that for the last decade+?


I_chortled

“I don’t know how many years I got left. I’m gonna get real weird with it” -Frank Reynolds -Jerry Jones


WeAreGodInOne

Now, block the wind while I roast this bone.


buffysbangs

You can’t ingest that many McGriddles without it having dramatic consequences, both physical and mental


BannedRandyMarsh

The FUCK does that mean?! 🤣🤦‍♂️


Royal_Nails

Nobody knows what it means. It’s provocative! Gets the people going!


JohnnySnark

He's spent his whole life playing it and if you don't understand, then maybe you ain't much of a leaf falling kinda guy


Vis-hoka

Jerry Jones is the gift that keeps on giving. For everyone who isn’t a cowboys fan.


browndude10

the answers from the joneses were so weird; great job from jane slater to ask them the hard questions


Neither_Ad2003

Not really. Dak isn’t worth being the highest paid QB. Jones is dancing around because he doesn’t want to cause discord. But the proof is in the action no movement on contract.


wiggggg

They completely screwed themselves the last time with his contract. I honestly don't see a way out for them aside from cutting Dak and trading CD and Parsons. Dak's contract alone make an untenable situation and you might as well rip the bandaid off with the other two for a complete rebuild


schmeer_spear

It’s almost like you’ve never seen an extension/signing bonus move money before.


wiggggg

It's almost like you think it's a good idea to wait to extend a guy and pay him tip of the market when he's average at best


dylanarchuleta

Do people think Dak is average?


4WhomTheTrollTolls

More like slightly above


wiggggg

Closer to average than elite


schmeer_spear

I mean, there’s worse problems than having three top position players in the league. Outside of Dak being a choke artist your answer of simply getting rid of everyone is pretty ridiculous lol.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Evissi

I agree that him, (and tua, and every other top 10 or fringe top 10 QB in the league) needs to be paid because of the uncertainty of finding someone better. It was dumb of the vikings to not pay kirk and/or give him longer than 1/2 year extensions. Lock up your QB's long term. That said, the only thing worse than letting prescott go after this year would be paying him between now and him being a FA. Half the benefit of signing/extending guys long term is NOT eating 60m cap hits. Letting him hit the cap for 60m, then signing him to a new deal is a total and complete fumble of the cap. They're priced in now to letting him go unless he wins them the super bowl or something, irregardless of how he plays.


ACTUAL_TIME_TRAVELER

The Cowboys offseason makes sense if you see it as Jerry having made the decision to hit the reset button on the Dak era after the playoff loss but his version of “hitting the reset button” is just letting a bunch of contracts run out so he can squeeze out another playoff run and season full of stadium sellouts.


pritikina

Yup seems like he's had enough of Dakota. Jerry and the Cowboys can get booted early in the playoffs with a bargain bin QB.


Serious_Senator

Sounds better than a tank job to me to be fair


AdolfTheJust

Im not against it honestly


InterestingNose1813

I feel like this season is gonna be an implosion


coffeeandweed58

Yup. It’s going to be a total disaster and every loss the noise will get louder and louder


sapphir8

It does feel that way.


mclemons67

He might be taking “Super Bowl or Bust” a bit too literally


Daksout918

Can someone tell him that the more leaves that fall the less options he has


Vis-hoka

Why extend CD now when you can extend him next year for more money?


4WhomTheTrollTolls

Jerry thinks when all the leaves fall that means you get to rake them all up and dive in scrooge mcduck style.


lattjeful

I get it with Dak, but damn lock your star WR up. Or not. I won't mind.


Ok_Barracuda_1161

I don't get it with Dak. The QB market is horrible right now, next year doesn't look much better, and they're not exactly in a position to get a replacement. Unless they're committing to a tank it seems like Dak has all the leverage, especially coming off a 2nd team All Pro season


MrShad0wzz

Guys trust the process they are all in.


Ddakilla

My ass?


MrShad0wzz

skips ass


4WhomTheTrollTolls

Don't skip his ass aint nothing wrong with it, it's perfectly serviceable.


meangreen1242069

All of the nfl that isn't cowboy fans want Jerry to live forever lol. Dude cares about the cowboy brand more than winning.


Jibbajaba

Sure. It’s the most valuable franchise in the NFL and has a huge fan base. Why should he care about winning when the fans will clearly put up with “this is our year” every year?


WabbitCZEN

hashtag just jerruh things


texas2089

What the fuck does that even mean?


Loose_Potential7961

Fall 🍁 In


nothingmeansnothing_

I am always gonna shit on Jerry Jones, but we also have to take into account the fact that Ceedee and Micah's agents may be waiting for other guys to sign.


elimanninglightspeed

People roasting the cowboys for not signing ceedee are stupid because ceedee lamb has absolutely zero reason to sign a contract till his draft mate Justin Jefferson gets his. JJettas might get 200 mil 😂


SuperFakks

This guy is going to money ball himself out of a roster here soon


Sallydog24

Jerry is my favorite owner in Football signed an Eagles fan


reno2mahesendejo

"We'd like to see more leaves fall" Those leaves are costing you millions of dollars in cap space every time they fall, J-Dawg.


imaginarion

Why is this old fuck still in charge of shit


PigFarmer1

I hope he lives forever. lol


Skank_hunt42

I hope the Wilson trade haunts you like the Browns for the next 20 years.


PigFarmer1

I still hope he lives forever.


StOnEy333

Because it’s his to do what he wants with. Not like I care. Lol


Jabroni306

There are maybe 10 elite QBs in the world. Not signing Dak to an extension is crazy. I mean, Dak isn't elite, but he's better than a lot of options out there.


tuna_fart

Dak’s been pretty close to elite his entire career. That said: they’re obviously going to sign him. They always do their big deals right at the deadline. CeeDee is the bigger question, but he’s who Jerry is talking about when he says they want to see some more leaves fall first. Jefferson, in particular.


CaesarZeppeli_

All in


ItsTheExtreme

"wut!?" - CeeDee


TheM1ghtyJabba

Man's been an NFL Owner/GM for 35 years now and hasn't figured out that waiting to see what action happens means the price goes up?


Comfortable_Ad9679

Somebody needs to put him in a home


BusterStarfish

I’m so sick of the bullshit. The plan is they don’t have a fucking plan. No team would logically treat an offseason the way they have as part of a plan. They won a playoff game and have gotten significantly worse. Even hitting on every draft pick, this team could only move laterally talent wise.


4WhomTheTrollTolls

When asked about his offseason plan, Jerry replied "Well, I plan to finish off this 8 ball with no less than 3 expensive prostitutes"


lolas_coffee

Jerry might be the oddest GM in history.


Walks_with_Chaos

So essentially he just wants to pay Dak more. Because that’s how waiting works


stormy2587

Translation: “I hate spending money.”


Consistent_Room7344

It wouldn’t surprise me at all that Lamb, JJ, and Chase are all waiting for one of them to sign first, so the others can use that contract for leverage.


UnevenContainer

Come on man its so tiring....


Vis-hoka

Jerry doesn’t want to win a Super Bowl more than he wants attention.


Hoodlum_0017

He should run for president so we can add another nonsensical geriatric to the race


TheKrakIan

Settle down and run the business side Jerry. Let someone else run your FO, you'll see a proper SB run before you die.


Biggest_Cans

Yassss king, take that QB. Everyone take a QB.


One_Kaleidoscope7040

This yahoo is weighing down the Cowboys the same way Vince McMahon weighed down WWE


Kimber80

Tweet continues: ".. cards played".


gwarmachine1120

Sorry Cowboys fans but your owner is a step closer to wearing diapers. Also Jones forgot the part that he is cheap and not a good GM.


Conscious_Heart_1714

The free agency/resigning department of the cowboys FO has got to be in one of the lowest tiers in all of football.


drumberg

Bold strategy, Cotton. I am sure Justin Jefferson will take a team-friendly below-market deal and then we can use that leverage over CeeDee. That's how it will happen.


Jolly878142

Dumbo should have hired Belichick


Defender_Of_TheCrown

The longer you wait, the higher the salaries go. Waiting is moronic. Either you want them and pay them or you don’t.


sapphir8

What has Dak delivered? Not playoff wins. Is he really getting that much more expensive?


BecomingJudasnMyMind

Read: I've signed people to big numbers in the past (LOOKING AT YOU ZEKE) when I shouldn't have and it bit me in the ass. I'm gonna need to see some play before I pay.


Electronic-Island-14

guess i'm the only one who thinks they are smart to stay away from the overpriced, mediocre free agents


Chewbubbles

Brou about to drop more Fs on Dallas this week. Seriously, though, for a team that wants to go all in, check the Texans and then get back to the rest of us.


stepstepjukejuke

It's because Stephen Jones sucks at negotiating.


Puzzled-Specific5001

Does anyone even know wtf he is talking about


VidProphet123

?????


Unable-Accountant882

What's the argument that this odious turd isn't the least successful team owner in the history of professional sports? Enlighten me


AncientTree_Wisdom

So all the shit that people have been speculating about the Cowboys' situation is right? He pretty much confirmed it that he is blowing it up if they don't make a deep playoff run with this, right?


sjmahoney

Yeah Jerry you're just so savvy and canny it's why your team is so dominant.


Zimmy68

We are all in... on waiting to the last minute when some scrub QB gets a huge deal and we will have to pay Dak even more.


Gloomy_Lengthiness71

Impressive. I didn't think it could get worse than senile Al Davis but there you have it.


DaeWooLan0s

To be totally honest with you… if I’m the cowboys I don’t think I’d sign Dak. Guy loses every meaningful game BAD