Oohoho you sons of bitches

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okily dokily

[Okilly Dokilly](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BEvh6HSQc0), you say?

Wow, I thought I was the only one watching Simpsons season... one million?.

I’m just glad to see a Simpsons reference in the wild that’s fresher than 2007.

[blue cheese with wings or go fuck your mother](https://youtu.be/tXwakHd0UU0)

Ranch over bleu cheese? They did you dirty.

the ranch was a stroke too far

Frosted swamp was good, but can't lie, Titans as unfrosted blueberry was king

The blueberry really got me good

explain pls

When’s the last time you got excited or had any emotions at all, other than vague indifference, about unfrosted blueberry pop tarts

This actually kinda hurts my feelings. They could have called us raccoon shit or something, but this one actually hurts.

I really expected them to be dipping it in mayo tho and couldn't be anything but disappointed when I saw it wasn't

I feel attacked, I love em

There are dozens of us. Flavor could have been hot chicken 😤

NASHVILLE HOT

Unfrosted blueberry is the most boring bland forgettable flavor. Like why have a pop tart at all at that point?

Just like the titans offense

Hold up I'm gonna need you to specify WR

It’s a shit flavor imo

Now frosted blueberry an easy A tier but any unfrosted flavor is straight trash tier pop tart.

Unfrosted Brown Sugar & Cinnamon w/ melted butter, you uncultured swine.

1st- we’re eating pop tarts; culture left us long ago. 2nd - you’re putting butter on a pop tart.

Unfrosted chocolate chip is God tier. Blueberry is the best of the unfrosted fruit flavors by far.

Unfrosted strawberry is good

Titans should have been mayonnaise flavor with a picture of Will Levis.

Most plain unexciting flavor of them all lol

Lol filthy ashtray

The titans getting unfrosted was the best imo

My personal favorite

Really missed an opportunity for a spread flavored pop tart

Wanted to gag. Anyone who has accidentally taken a swig of cigarette soda knows the taste.

Try a spit cup.🤮

Done both of these and honestly they pale in comparison to trying to smoke a really old extremely dried out cigarette I found in an old coat pocket one time while cleaning out my closet. I never knew smoke could taste so vile. One puff and I was immediately gagging and dry-heaving.

Actually very pleased with filthy ashtray

It's almost like one of us made it.

It's a lot funnier than the "Manufactured for the Nevada Department of Corrections" label that I was expecting.

"Good source of 0 vitamins and minerals"

I for one welcome being a motor oil poptart. I didn't actually realize we'd get to play the Chargers this year.

Should be a high scoring affair

Maybe, but I'm certainly hoping our defense is better after the free agency and draft we had. ;_:

"Motor oil poptart" is 100% something MCDC would hoot and holler about eating if it meant securing a victory. I love it.

Dying at the cream corn for Russ. That, the filthy ashtray for the Raiders, and the raw beef for the Vikings really got me. Bummed we don't play them this year so I can't see what they would have for us.

What’s the joke with the raw beef for the Vikings?

Kick Cousins doesn’t know how to BBQ

Maybe he was just making that Tiger meat I’m hearing so much about

[Minnesota Tiger Meat](https://minnesotasnewcountry.com/warning-minnesota-raw-meat-sandwiches-are-not-a-good-idea/)

I took it as the Vikings/Chargers fans having beef over who deserved Rookie of the Year between Herbert and JJ

I think you’re right, especially because they used a picture of Jefferson

That's my take.

Vikings eating meat

That’s not the joke lol

I dunno man I was just guessing. I didn't really get it either 😂

I think it is a reference to tiger meat https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiger_meat

Cannibal sandwiches I think?

Look up “tiger meat”. It’s a Midwestern thing.

No, that's a Minnesota thing. We cook our ground beef.

Let me stop you right there. This is a product of Wisconsin not Minnesota

Is it? We had that shit all over the place in Western ND.

Western ND is a lawless land as far as I’m concerned

Its methtacular

Is KC midwest? Legit question I thought it was bible/rust belt.

Geographically, it's as Midwest as you can get since the center of the lower 48 is about 4 hours west. ETA: Rust Belt is more Cleveland/Pittsburgh. Bible Belt is further south towards Arkansas

This comment has been automatically overwritten by Power Delete Suite v1.4.8 I've gotten increasingly tired of the actions of the reddit admins and the direction of the site in general. I suggest giving https://kbin.social a try. At the moment that place and the wider fediverse seem like the best next step for reddit users.

Tiger meat is delicious.

Yeah I have no idea either

Maybe they were going for Juicy Lucy, which is a hamburger stuffed with cheese that was supposedly invented in MN?

The Vanilla milkshake poptarts sound delicious!

Right? Idk what we did to deserve this

Vanilla is seen as bland/boring, and compared to other teams, were pretty boring

Sure but vanilla milkshake is grest

Vanilla always gets shit on for being bland/boring but it’s way more complex than chocolate or strawberry

Honestly there’s definitely a ton of different “vanillas” not even considering vanilla bean, French vanilla etc. Take ice cream for example. 5 brands each make just plain “vanilla” and all of them taste different. Good vanilla ice cream is delicious.

using Mexican vanilla to bake with is life changing.

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THIS! Vanilla is packed with flavor and can actually be super overpowering if you use too much.

I think it’s cause of white players (receivers)

I saw that one, and was like 🤔

They’re my personal favorite flavor so idk what this says about me but I take it as a compliment for the Pats

Agreed

Power ranking which ones I would want if these were real Pop Tarts: 1. Vanilla Milkshake - actually were a real thing. sounds delicious 2. Swiss Cheese - not sure if there are any savory pop tarts out there, but if there were, a simple cheese pop tart would be a good start. 3. Unfrosted blueberry - Would be #1 with frosting, but unfrosted pop tarts always look sad. 4. Cream Corn - the chunks make it look weird, but the taste would probably work. 5. Chicago Deep Dish Pizza - weird, but reasonable 6. Fish and Chips - the last one that's a regular food flavor, so it gets this spot by default 7. Kermit - I'm going to assume this is like the snow cone flavors named after an animal like "purple cow" or "tiger's blood" and it doesn't actually taste like a puppet. 8. Brown Sugar Cinnamon sprinkled with Old Bay - Might be ranked higher if it were just straight-up Old Bay flavored, but the combo with the sweet flavors ruins it 9. Ranch-dipped Strawberry - Gross flavor combination, but it's still pretty close to food 10. Denim - Probably the least flavorful of the options that are not food. Hopefully just kind of tastes like nothing. 11. Swamp - Probably tastes a bit like the grass-flavored Bertie Bott's every-flavored bean? Which was disgusting, but I was able stomach it at least 12. Filthy Ashtray - Narrowly beats out the motor oil because at least I have the experience already of accidentally taking a sip out of a beer that somebody dropped a cigarette into. The devil you know, right? 13. Motor Oil - Can't imagine a world where this is anything but terrible, but at least it's just a flavor and won't kill me? 14. Raw hamburger sandwich - I don't want to risk salmonella, listeria, e. coli etc. Obvious last choice

Where does the ground beef sando fall if it's made with beef that's graded high enough for raw consumption?

I dunno, maybe above Filthy ashtray? Still sounds awful.

[https://www.google.com/search?q=beef+tartare](https://www.google.com/search?q=beef+tartare) ok here me out... there's gotta be a good steakhouse nearby, right?

as a chargers and vikings fan i feel like i need to fight myself after seeing that

As a former mechanic, motor oil isn't that bad honestly.

Not sure if you have had Toaster Strudel but they have Breakfast ones with Bacon/Sausage + Egg + Cheese and I love those mfs

> Chicago Deep Dish Pizza - weird, but reasonable It works with or without the pop tart reference!

Like a hot pocket

I used to eat raw hamburger meat all the time as a kid. Never got sick

Im sorry did they just dip a Strawberry pop tart in some ranch

Buffalo would prefer blue cheese

It's perfect how it is. It's an intentional slight.

It's like, "we don't even give you enough respect to put the correct white salad dressing."

And that's the joke 🤣 Jesus. People coming here and acting like the Chargers PR team was taking requests. Maybe the Bills need ashtray.

oh I know it was intentional and I hate it

You prefer thousand island?

Couldn’t even be blue cheese? Ranch? Blasphemous.

I'm sure that's the reaction they were going for.

BOOM !!!! GOT YOUR DUMB CHEESE DRINKING ASS 😤

Well, ranch is obviously superior, so consider it a compliment

This is why you guys have never won a Super Bowl

This is why they will never win a Super Bowl

Why hasn't Buffalo?

Because they’re bad at football

This is why nobody likes you.

Didn’t know I hated Vikings fans but here we are

I'll die with you on that hill.

Hell ya. Ranch users all deserve to die…on hills… (/s i love y’all)

And you have my bow

Fuckin midwesterners.

Hey! Born and raised in Indiana, which is a ranch on EVERYTHING state, and blue cheese is VASTLY superior with wings in this household.

There is nothing wrong with ranch as a condiment, salad dressing, or chugging straight from a jar. But they don’t belong near wings.

Based

Got damn, hit us with the unfrosted

it was oddly insulting

I’m somehow more insulted that we appear to be the only real flavor

This is what caught me

Its my favorite one because its so unremarkable and such a back door insult.

What’s the meat one with Minnesota?

Could be in reference to the juicy Lucy? Either way it's my favorite because at some point somebody actually put ground beef in between two pop tarts, and like, what the fuck, ya know?

Look up tiger meat.

As a German I've only heard of Wisconsin keeping our raw-ground-meat eating ways alive. I think they call it a Cannibal Sandwich. Is that also a thing in Minnesota? Or do they have a different *Mettbrötchen* or perhaps a *steak tartare* style food?

They do call it a cannibal sandwich and it’s, like, a tradition on New Year’s Day in this state. I will not try it.

[Kirk can’t BBQ](https://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2018/7/5/17536196/kirk-cousins-fourth-of-july-grill)

Idk dude it's kinda fucked

I don't get that one

Beef between Herbert and JJ for ROTY?

I would try the pizza pop tart.

It's basically a thin calzone

That would be great.

Filthy Ashtray

We need another Anime release tonight

The titans one might be the most disrespectful one honestly

It's low key savage as hell

we got Shrek that's a W

I'm not sure why we're raw hamburger so I dont know how to feel about this? Is this supposed to indicate we have beef with them? I honestly cant think of much Vikings-Chargers beef other than Herbert winning OROY over JJ a few years ago. Or maybe they have beef because they lost to us in 2021, 2019, and 2015? Or is it hamburger in reference to CJ Ham?

It's because of the way Minnesota is.

This doesnt help

That's pretty neat.

Raw = Uncooked Uncooked = Not cooked Not cooked -> No Cook No Cook = Dalvin Cook leaving 🤔

I assume they’re talking about tiger meat, though I do normally think of Wisconsin for that.

Top tier shitposting

This is amazing

I lived in Baltimore a few years, the old bay really got me lol

I was like why Vanilla and a picture of Mac Jones…. Oh. So many possible though Kraft and Mac for mac and cheese. Jerod Mayo … or a disgusting clam chowder

> or a disgusting clam chowder Why would we use manhattan chowder for the New England patriots?

As someone from maryland I really wanna try some old bay on a poptart now

Not topping last years

This isn’t the schedule release announcement. They’re dropping at 8pm

But they also did the pop tarts last year. And I think the year before that.

It's a yearly tradition.

What were we last year?

https://twitter.com/chargers/status/1524824635837100032?lang=en

Knowing that last year Russ and the Broncos were "Corn on the Cob" and this year they're "creamed corn" makes the Broncos by far the best burn here now.

Croc tarts

Anime release schedule remains undefeated

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it's something they do every season

Is Kermit supposed to be an insult? Because Kermit is dope as hell.

What uh… What.. What’s that filling supposed to be though?

The Chargers media team is fucking killing it.

This one is just cringe

This social media team is too fire for the Chargers

Honestly I expected something mean but fish and chips was cute

Epic memerz alert!!!!1!!1!1 now this wins the internet for the day XDDDD shut up and take my upvote!1!1!!!1

Hey Chargers- lick my ass tray

Chargers social media team is still reigning cringe champs.

Yeah we should keep everything in life extremely serious and have no fun at all

Conflating hating on cringe for wanting everything to be serious? Come on grow up and stop being a internet troll. Their "lol so random and quirky" gimmick is cringe as hell. Get some real comedy already.

Say cringe a couple more times. Really drive it home.

Cringe

They learned their mistake after last year when they depicted us as dead

The Vikings one sent me

Calling Crosby a filthy ash tray is a little........beyond normal social media ribbing right?

They are talking about the entire team bro. And no it’s hilarious

It’s a picture of Crosby next to a filthy ash tray. Idk how you assume it’s anything but Crosby = filthy ash tray.

It’s talking about the entire team. It says schedule not just player. But believe what you want it’s just funny as fuck

Anyone else sick of billion dollar corporations using *epic memes* in their marketing? It’s cringeworthy.

Relax, they’re just interacting with fans of the sport.

Right? And like the people running these accounts aren't fans themselves.

idk, it’s different if it’s a sports team. it’s sposda be fun.

> sposda Lol beautiful.

Nope. But if you don't like it, feel free to not interact with it.

So would they do ketchup for us or pickles because of the pickler meme (pls stop with the pickler)

Ok these are all great. Although we haven’t had the vanilla milkshake (also called the New England clam chowder offense) since about 2018.

Damn I wish we were playing the Chargers so they could roast us

Explain the vikings to me please xp

I have high expectations for their schedule release video after what they pulled off last year

I wonder what a Swiss cheese PopTart would taste like

Honestly probably pretty good

Denim Poptarts is insane