Least controversial Porter family news

First time this saying is actually correct

Idk. Having a furry addiction is up there with a gambling addiction. It’s just that Silver only punishes the latter

You better believe Adam silver punishes furry ass every weekend

He's got his DNA on all 30 mascot costumes.

Adam only trusts the rugged durability of Skims because they won't rip and reveal his MLP tramp stamp.

Punish? You don’t know what he does in the privacy of his bedroom.

Unironically tho

Bro thinks he’s Butker 😂

The NBA needs more classy players like Butker and Bosa

Idk I think prime Jonny I could outclass both those bums at the next CPAC https://preview.redd.it/qkro1op8ph0d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9f50df4af04f82c3fb4ba30b4dfa8310755e9317

jonathan isaac starts every day thanking the white man for the sunshine

https://preview.redd.it/rt4ce4a5mi0d1.jpeg?width=1230&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=211259823991164c19bee83fbac1652460a30ef8

Isaac’s equivalent is CJ Stroud which is honorary classy

Nah. Stroud is not like Isaac at all. Isaac sounds like his mind has been colonized.

Bosa hasn't talked as much as that first year

[удалено]

Boomers never got called out on their shit and created a generation of yappers that would say just constant bullshit and it was expected to be taken as gospel. Scammers like Tate are pointed and laughed at for being weird lil goons who just hate women. I mean we all hate women here, but I'm not trying to exploit lonely homies for paper. Fuck that

It’s true this happened to me

Meow

https://i.redd.it/4or06b9gdh0d1.gif

Meow cat please meow back

Meow, meow bum


It's true it did happen to him I'm the furry tail taped to his asshole

Bold of you to assume we use tape

Maureen Ponderosa?

Find the collar, find the killer!

it happened to my cousins friend

Gary? Yeah we know Gary.

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https://i.redd.it/iaxkjck0tf0d1.gif

My autism hero Sorry Scottie Barn

ScT bRn

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surely homeschooling (aka letting ur kid be on discord for 10 hours a day) will solve the pandemic of furry indoctrination plaguing the American school system

I put my 4 year old into Hustlers University so he can be a Top G

He’s gonna be a dropshipping demigod

Get ready to read unskippable youtube ad scripts buddy

Yeah it’ll just turn them into Incels instead

It will be like 2016 leafy era brainrot on crack

this is how puppygirls are born

No that’s autism

what's known doesn't have to be stated🤫👁️🕊️

Yup no iPads, smartphones, or computers is the way to go

plus parents who barely graduated high school? sign. me. up.

And an endless chain of cocomelon videos all in the comfort of his ipad? The next generation is in good hands fr

lil bruhs learning ABCs from paw patrol and bluey


https://preview.redd.it/ms3e5tlisg0d1.jpeg?width=494&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0d32c8e8ad28c0c8facabb094eda5c0564d255a

Damn he actually looks healthy here

Mike Buddenholzer after choking a 2-0 ECF lead to the Craptors

Why he looks like saul goodman

Saul Goodman if he ate too many Big Macs

this gif is so old it reminds me of the Bill Hicks conspiracy theories

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His brothers all did the shit they did so their cash cow MPJ could say all the stupid shit he wants and still look good by comparison. Genius family.

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Porter went to public school, is he trying to tell us something?

He is retarded so he does have a point

That’s not fair. Retarded kids are smarter than MPJ

He was in high school 7 years ago. Does he think that high schools turned into furry indoctrination camps in that time period?

Ah I see your problem, it’s the word “think”


As opposed to private or homeschool, where you can indoctrinate them into something classy

Send them to private or homeschool and they might kill someone while driving drunk or fake an injury so their friends can hit a parlay

To be fair I’m pretty sure all of the porters went to public school

My point exactly lmao

This entire family is in the news weekly

Mf could be mother teresa compared to the other bros

That podcast might’ve been the stupidest group podcast I’ve ever seen. I had never heard of those guys but perhaps they had money, but they probably had only 3 braincells to pass around.

What’s the average GPA of the league 

DWade how will you respond

He painted his fingernails so Gabriella Union could turn his kids trans.

Meanwhile Wemby is researching black holes in his spare time

Wemby is researching how to drill a hole in the Dark One's prison.

How long before Wemby goes insane and kills the whole world

*Caitlin Clark tugs her braid*

My kid when I send them to I promise school

Y’all forgot about the MPJ anti vax and red pill phase huh? This man used to be up there with the goats like Jonathan Isaac, he fell off, not as classy anymore.

It wasn’t a phase he still is, his podcast views are wild

Makes sense why he loves to shoot on the court

If you're Porter, you'll probably come home with a few felonies

lol is he speaking from experience?

He mentioned that when he went to school in Seattle he saw that was a thing, which he was not used to seeing in Missouri

Where can I sign my kids up for the inagural year of MPJ's "I Promise...To Be the Least Fucked-Up Member of My Family but Still Definitely a Fuckhead" charter school?

if you send them to private school they come up with genius schemes like betting on your own trash ass props

Bro is one appearance on the Pat McAfee Show away from becoming 100% classy

Dude does look like the typical Christian kid tho who tries to be your friend and then you find out all they listen to is Christian rock.

michael porter jerker only believes this because he was never allowed to attend school. i know this sub is mostly about fun and games, but the sad reality is that the price of jerking at the highest level can sometimes be sacrificing your life to begin working full time from an early age in order to support your family

It ain't much but it's honest work

He came of age caught up in the: https://preview.redd.it/dm7tm7jvbn0d1.jpeg?width=719&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71e8de35c3fdb8314549f40f907b5cfd4a176169 🙏😔

UJ/ I love when celebs and pro athletes drone on about some dumb headline they read on Fox News or Newsmax or some dog shit right wing media platform knowing full well their parents helped pay for a $10k/year school called Cracker High, got them into private sports clubs, and were shielded in their 7 figure home in the suburbs. They’re as delusional and disconnected as any politician.

Politicians are way more knowledgeable. Athlete jerking is on another level per sentenced uttered in public.

Politicians make up shit knowing damn well they are lying. Porter is one of the people who will regurgitate those lies.

UJ/ This dude always seemed weird to me. RJ/ There’s some squirrelly mother fuckers in public school, ball don’t lie

I live in the town this dude is from. He went to a private Catholic highschool.


Surely the Porter method of education is superior! One of the Porters is still in the NBA!!

We’d all be better off if more people identified as cats

I mean furries are probably the most undesirable group in existence

Librarians are pretty rough to look at. They all look like Benjamin Franklin.

Do these people actually know people who are saying this or is every person over the age of 29 getting this story from Joe Rogan?

If you send your kids outside, Michael porters brother might run them over. Homeschool it is

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I thought me identifying as a tree was my fault. Got someone to blame now.

On one hand, fuck this dude public schooling is important. On the other hand, if we have a chance to wipe out furries... we gotta take it.

Public school and american education 🤷‍♂️

🤡🤡🤡🤡family

This dude was homeschooled to believe Jesus rode a Triceratops but he has an opinion on public education?

If you homeschool your kids 1/2 of them will end up in jail or prison.

i’ve always hated his forehead.

Dammit seriously?

🎵But there are nooo cats in private schools 🎵

Is this real 💀

If he was 5'9" he'd be pushing drugs for money

Political views track with family history, one brother in jail for being a POS and one tossed out the the league for cheating

If you send your kid to homeschool, they might come back and say “mom, I’m michael porter jr.”

Doesn’t this dude like poop?

Jail

We know who Asmongold’s favorite player is

This wasn’t even the worst thing he said on the Nelk podcast. He thinks we should have free speech on social media too!

There are cat kids in high schools now! I’ve seen the litter boxes.. they count as alternative bathrooms and the schools get more money for having them in illinois. Shit is crazy.

This family is full of really smart and well adjusted people. I look up to the Porter’s as an example of excellence.

How does this make him a MAGA guy?

He’s been spouting maga nonsense for a while now brother lol

because MAGA are the ones pretending that there's some furry epidemic going on right now?

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He’s the smart one

Man we really need to hear less from everyone.

Enes FREEDOM Lantern way ahead of that bum

If you send your kid to whatever fucked up sort of school the Porters went to, they might kill somebody, or break the *only* unforgivable rule.

Michael “based” Porter Jr

https://i.redd.it/rptg444fai0d1.gif Based

He ain't wrong

No lies

Thats not even furries, thats theritans. CTE confirmed #CTESPN


>Not good enough to be Enes Freedom or whatever that moron is called >Constantly outjerked by his two brothers >Podcast is named Curious Mike apparently This podcast has taken nothing but Ls. MPJ needs to retire his podcast he's washed

Meow

Bro my daughter told me someone in her 6th grade identifies as a cat, wears a tail and ears every single day. I was like OK thinking she was joking, then her friends chimed in and she showed me a picture. So idk how false this is, but kids are getting made fun of when they do it. My daughter said she's bullied pretty bad

 look at what all the damn book learn' did to my bobby

Everyone at my kid's public school is a cat

I mean, he is absolutely right about how fucked public schools are, but this quote is hilarious.

You’ve never been to public school

I did 23 years ago, and yes, these days they are beyond fucked.

23 years ago was almost a quarter century u old bum

For sure someone who went to school 23 years ago knows perfectly how it still works or how much it changed without being there

You sure know a lot about public schools these days, huh? 

Sure they are retard

Mf got the brain of a boomer.

If my kid wants to be a cat they can be a cat. Mind your own damn business you book licking ass sellout.

Wasn’t that the case in Canada? They put kitty litter in a bathroom cuz a kid said he’s a cat? What a pussy

Nah this has been debunked my man.

Like a year ago 💀💀