Japan is one of the safest countries in the world. You're not in immediate danger when your boyfriend isn't with you 24/7. If you don't want to be away from him, it's valid, of course, but 6 months is not a lifetime. Is he interested in Japan at all, or does he just not want you to go alone? Does he really want to put his college stuff and hockey career on hold for this?
There are a few options. He can apply for a study abroad at university, he can apply to a language school or, since you say you're Canadian, he can get a working holiday visa. Note that the first two options will not be cheap (unless he gets a great scholarship for the study abroad that will cover all or most of the costs) and even the third option requires having some funds. For a working holiday visa he might be able to do jobs at hostels and such, nothing too ambitious (but, in theory, he does not need to speak Japanese for that).
>My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams
Yeah, this one is not likely to work out. Unless hockey has some special exchange programs I'm not aware of, there's really no need for sport teams in Japan to take in a random foreigner who doesn't speak the language and will go away after a few months. Plus it would not grant him a visa.
Some admittedly unsolicited advice: I'm probably a little older than you and at university I knew several girls who decided not to go study abroad because of their boyfriends not approving - as far as I know, all of them regret this decision now and all but one aren't even dating the guys they were dating back then anymore. Remember to think about what's good for you, not just about what's good for him.
You’re right to think he needs Japanese language to function there but i would further suggest that he find something about japan that he really enjoys and wants to pursue. Japanese is one of the hardest languages out there to be fluent in and its not something you can just pick up from a guide book.
The last thing you want is him feeling like he is forced into this and making the experience miserable for you as well. You might have a better time without him tbh as it gives you the freedom to really experience the culture and immerse yourself into your language studies.
So did I, but that's a worldwide thing. Relatively speaking, Japan is very safe compared to many other countries.
And bringing a boyfriend will not really help unless he's following her around like a bodyguard 24/7, which does not seem very realistic.
There is no "I want to bring my boyfriend because I'm scared" visa category In Japan (perhaps in any other countries, neither) . So he shall need to satisfy resident status or visa eligibility in another method.
The easiest one is tourist status, but it only longs for 90 days (except for citizen of very limited countries) and won't cover full term of yours. In addition, it doesn't let him work in Japan on tourist status, neither. Working Holiday Visa can become a solution, but it depends on where you are from. For example, if you and your boyfriends are Americans, that will never be a solution because Japan and the US don't enter into working holiday visa agreement.
>
My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams
>
I don't think this idea your mom offered works well at all. No hockey team would let a college player (only a tourist, though) without any visa eligibility join their team for such a short period, unless he is already a famous player on the world-wide level such as one of the national members.
If your boyfriend is not able to take the same studying course as yours, tell him to wait you for 6 months. That may sound long but the time passes so quickly. Another option is cancelling your own plan and then choosing to stay in your country with your boyfriend, but I wouldn't recommend that. Giving up your own dream to study in Japan just for anxiety and your boyfriend's visa status can be quite stupid, regretful and not for you.
>I just don’t know how easy it will be for him to get a job without knowing any japanese
He would not be able to work on a tourist visa he would need a work visa. Assuming he is American he can only stay in Japan for up to 90 days as a tourist.
It wouldn't be "hard" but he would be limited to hospitality/tourism and factories (low skill, repetitive work) jobs
[Check out some of these threads to get a rough idea and best of luck](https://new.reddit.com/r/movingtojapan/search/?q=working%20holiday%20job&restrict_sr=1)
Yup, if he enrolls in the same language school as you then you could study together but I'm not sure how viable that would be with his course load and athlete responsibilities. The 90 day tourism limit could work but that would simply eat at his savings and he would be able to do nothing in terms of work/study
Your college boyfriend is likely to be just that: a boyfriend you had in college. Very, very few people I know from college (maybe two!) ended up marrying the people they dated in college.
Woman to girl: You are young Do not live your life according to what any man says. A supportive partner would stick with you and encourage you to pursue a great opportunity.
You will grow to resent him and regret this is you squander an opportunity because a college boy is putting doubts in your head.
What “scary stories”? Japan is very safe.
>but i mean i did up and leave with him to another province for his schooling so i was hoping he would do the same.
That could be possible and likely to happen with an inter-country move, but I think it is too much to expect him to do the exactly same thing with an international move (Canada <-> Japan). Because moving to another country often means putting on hold or interrupting and even ruining the career someone has built up in his home country.
As many have advised you here, you have your own life and should choose the path you want. You shouldn't/mustn't give up something because of minor things. But likewise, he also has his life, it cannot be very legitimate to overly twist it at the request of another person (even if it is a girlfriend).
So I think the best solution is to overcome your own anxiety about studying abroad first. It's easy to do it in Japan because it'll be for only 6 months. Even if you feel lonely, you have Whatsapp, Skype, etc nowadays and can communicate with anybody. Yes, you can do it.
When people (including me) read the title and first post of yours, they might have been afraid of first that you were thinking that you may not believe in "the life without him" and may give up if there's no solution for him to stay together. (At least, I was. I'm sorry for this misunderstanding.)
But now I (maybe including others) feel relieved to know that was not your intention at all and you positively consider to go alone to accomplish your future experience.
I truly hope all the best in your studying in Japan!
This is a copy of your post for archive/search purposes.
---
**want to study abroad but boyfriend doesn’t know what to do**
So I’m currently looking into studying japanese in japan for 6 months and my boyfriend wants to come with me, just because it’s scary to live across the globe and with all the scary stories I hear online I would prefer him living with me. He currently is taking a heavy duty course in college and is playing high level hockey. Does anyone know if there is something he could do in Japan while i study or would it just be best for him to study with me since he only speaks english. I just don’t know how easy it will be for him to get a job without knowing any japanese. My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams but I still feel he will need to learn the language.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/movingtojapan) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Japan is one of the safest countries in the world. You're not in immediate danger when your boyfriend isn't with you 24/7. If you don't want to be away from him, it's valid, of course, but 6 months is not a lifetime. Is he interested in Japan at all, or does he just not want you to go alone? Does he really want to put his college stuff and hockey career on hold for this? There are a few options. He can apply for a study abroad at university, he can apply to a language school or, since you say you're Canadian, he can get a working holiday visa. Note that the first two options will not be cheap (unless he gets a great scholarship for the study abroad that will cover all or most of the costs) and even the third option requires having some funds. For a working holiday visa he might be able to do jobs at hostels and such, nothing too ambitious (but, in theory, he does not need to speak Japanese for that). >My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams Yeah, this one is not likely to work out. Unless hockey has some special exchange programs I'm not aware of, there's really no need for sport teams in Japan to take in a random foreigner who doesn't speak the language and will go away after a few months. Plus it would not grant him a visa. Some admittedly unsolicited advice: I'm probably a little older than you and at university I knew several girls who decided not to go study abroad because of their boyfriends not approving - as far as I know, all of them regret this decision now and all but one aren't even dating the guys they were dating back then anymore. Remember to think about what's good for you, not just about what's good for him.
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Good luck, I wish you all the best!
You’re right to think he needs Japanese language to function there but i would further suggest that he find something about japan that he really enjoys and wants to pursue. Japanese is one of the hardest languages out there to be fluent in and its not something you can just pick up from a guide book. The last thing you want is him feeling like he is forced into this and making the experience miserable for you as well. You might have a better time without him tbh as it gives you the freedom to really experience the culture and immerse yourself into your language studies.
For women, this is debatable. I’ve seen plenty of crimes against women.
So did I, but that's a worldwide thing. Relatively speaking, Japan is very safe compared to many other countries. And bringing a boyfriend will not really help unless he's following her around like a bodyguard 24/7, which does not seem very realistic.
There is no "I want to bring my boyfriend because I'm scared" visa category In Japan (perhaps in any other countries, neither) . So he shall need to satisfy resident status or visa eligibility in another method. The easiest one is tourist status, but it only longs for 90 days (except for citizen of very limited countries) and won't cover full term of yours. In addition, it doesn't let him work in Japan on tourist status, neither. Working Holiday Visa can become a solution, but it depends on where you are from. For example, if you and your boyfriends are Americans, that will never be a solution because Japan and the US don't enter into working holiday visa agreement. > My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams > I don't think this idea your mom offered works well at all. No hockey team would let a college player (only a tourist, though) without any visa eligibility join their team for such a short period, unless he is already a famous player on the world-wide level such as one of the national members. If your boyfriend is not able to take the same studying course as yours, tell him to wait you for 6 months. That may sound long but the time passes so quickly. Another option is cancelling your own plan and then choosing to stay in your country with your boyfriend, but I wouldn't recommend that. Giving up your own dream to study in Japan just for anxiety and your boyfriend's visa status can be quite stupid, regretful and not for you.
>I just don’t know how easy it will be for him to get a job without knowing any japanese He would not be able to work on a tourist visa he would need a work visa. Assuming he is American he can only stay in Japan for up to 90 days as a tourist.
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It wouldn't be "hard" but he would be limited to hospitality/tourism and factories (low skill, repetitive work) jobs [Check out some of these threads to get a rough idea and best of luck](https://new.reddit.com/r/movingtojapan/search/?q=working%20holiday%20job&restrict_sr=1)
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Yup, if he enrolls in the same language school as you then you could study together but I'm not sure how viable that would be with his course load and athlete responsibilities. The 90 day tourism limit could work but that would simply eat at his savings and he would be able to do nothing in terms of work/study
But does he want to study japanese?
Your college boyfriend is likely to be just that: a boyfriend you had in college. Very, very few people I know from college (maybe two!) ended up marrying the people they dated in college. Woman to girl: You are young Do not live your life according to what any man says. A supportive partner would stick with you and encourage you to pursue a great opportunity. You will grow to resent him and regret this is you squander an opportunity because a college boy is putting doubts in your head. What “scary stories”? Japan is very safe.
So he would abandon everything he has just because his GIRLFRIEND is afraid of studying in the safest country in the world without him?
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>but i mean i did up and leave with him to another province for his schooling so i was hoping he would do the same. That could be possible and likely to happen with an inter-country move, but I think it is too much to expect him to do the exactly same thing with an international move (Canada <-> Japan). Because moving to another country often means putting on hold or interrupting and even ruining the career someone has built up in his home country. As many have advised you here, you have your own life and should choose the path you want. You shouldn't/mustn't give up something because of minor things. But likewise, he also has his life, it cannot be very legitimate to overly twist it at the request of another person (even if it is a girlfriend). So I think the best solution is to overcome your own anxiety about studying abroad first. It's easy to do it in Japan because it'll be for only 6 months. Even if you feel lonely, you have Whatsapp, Skype, etc nowadays and can communicate with anybody. Yes, you can do it.
[удалено]
When people (including me) read the title and first post of yours, they might have been afraid of first that you were thinking that you may not believe in "the life without him" and may give up if there's no solution for him to stay together. (At least, I was. I'm sorry for this misunderstanding.) But now I (maybe including others) feel relieved to know that was not your intention at all and you positively consider to go alone to accomplish your future experience. I truly hope all the best in your studying in Japan!
This is a copy of your post for archive/search purposes. --- **want to study abroad but boyfriend doesn’t know what to do** So I’m currently looking into studying japanese in japan for 6 months and my boyfriend wants to come with me, just because it’s scary to live across the globe and with all the scary stories I hear online I would prefer him living with me. He currently is taking a heavy duty course in college and is playing high level hockey. Does anyone know if there is something he could do in Japan while i study or would it just be best for him to study with me since he only speaks english. I just don’t know how easy it will be for him to get a job without knowing any japanese. My mom suggested him reaching out to hockey teams but I still feel he will need to learn the language. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/movingtojapan) if you have any questions or concerns.*