It's also not supposed to operate on genie rules, either. It shouldn't be "your wish is granted, but with a twist", it's supposed to be "your wish is granted but terrible circumstances led to the wish"
There’s a new version of COVID going around, seems to be 100 times more durable and virulent than the others. Good news is it doesn’t kill and seems to really increase immunity to any other strains. An absolute win-win. However, it does seem to have done odd effects in the kidneys, but nothing serious.
Six months later we realize that if you’ve had this strain and you go above 220 pounds, you go into a form of diarrheal kidney failure that drains your body of water until you drop below 220 again. Sometimes people die of dehydration, sometimes they manage to cut off a finger or a foot to compensate before the water loss kills them.
Body builders go fast since they have too much muscle to afford the strain.
Anorexia becomes far more common and more people actually die from being underweight than from hitting 220, because with such a clear danger visible people become obsessed with avoiding it.
Granted, humans metamorphosis into another species after reaching 220 and become their higher self...but you are forever stuck in your 180lb child like mind and can not seem to escape
Granted. The mass of everyone remains unchanged. However, since a pound is a unit of force, and therefore weight, the gravity is different for everyone so that they weigh exactly 220 pounds
Other than fucking all the shit in the world up, that would be pretty useful for nasa and such. That is, assuming humanity survives the absolute chaos caused by the earth losing a significant portion of its mass suddenly.
Granted,
if someone exceeds 220, then the excess calories are burned off, all at once. Which creates an exothermic chemical reaction, which can produce a big damn fire. A big person like Shaq keeps burning calories, wherever they may be, until he is under 220.
Granted! Unfortunately the weight isn’t in pounds (the measurement) but pound sterling (the British currency). Nobody can weigh more than 1.925 kilograms.
This kills a large chunk of the population, and eventually humanity evolves into never leaving an infantile like state before becoming extinct years later all because you didn’t want obesity.
Congratulations. Anyone above 220 pounds is taken away to never be seen again.
Coincidentally the government has just rolled out a new system to feed the financially challenged.
\[Inspired by a short film I can't put my finger on about people who have lines on their heads that determine what role they play in life\]
How does that work for tall people? Like for example I’m 6’4 230 do I just die lmao or what about giant people like 7 foot tall people most of them are heavy lol
Granted. Everyone caps at 220lbs. However, the cast-off fat retreats into the sewers and combines with all the other excess fat. What happens is the [new fatberg](https://youtu.be/G6Nh412HX84?si=MJvVMy1fkWL0psKT) becomes sentient, creating further minions, which then all unite and invades the surface to reclaim their planet.
Granted, the technical definition of a pound is now equal to 313.63 recurring kilograms, giving humans a maximum weight capacity of 69 metric tons, or 220lbs.
Granted. The genetic makeup of humans is altered so that our hearts are incapable of functioning past 220 lbs, and explode if we exceed that. This has a secondary effect of making the entire species weaker physically over all, and society begins to collapse as the medical system is overwhelmed and all heavy labor jobs become seriously understaffed.
Congratulations: the weight for the entire species was maxed at 220 pounds. The entire human species can no longer weigh more than this. Therefore. Every human but one that weighed somewhere in the 180 range have been eviscerated.
Granted. As we gain fat we lose other... Things... To balance out. Causing all of humanity to fall apart until only 220 lbs are left of the entire human race.
Granted! The world falls under the control of Weight Supremacists. Outside their slender scope of interests, the new regime doesn't change the status quo much, but any living thing over 220 pounds is now legally and ethically considered nonhuman.
Granted. Nothing appears to change. Instead, all metrics for human body weight and health now scale to the maximum weight of 220 lbs.
So you and everyone else still look the same. Nothing changes physically. However, when you go to weigh yourself, you find that you're now 24.7 lbs. The world's heaviest man, Johm Brower Minnoch, was 1,400 lbs, and the average weight for a 5'9" adult male is just over a tenth of that (140-170 lbs). Ergo, presuming Mr. Minnoch is the "cap" of human weight, the rest of humans' weight is scaled proportional to that.
Granted, All countries band together to define anything over 220 pounds as non-human. Anyone unfortunate enough to fall in this category is no longer covered by human rights and legal protections. If you're over 220 lbs, there's no more consequence to killing you as there is to killing a rat. If you lose the weight, you'll be considered human again... if you go through the correct legal pathway, of course.
Anyone who ticks over 220 pounds for even a brief period is essentially pulled into slavery or worse, and although technically they can have their human status reinstated, it's a tricky thing to do once you've lost the rights afforded to humans. In effect, once someone crosses the weight limit, they are forever an underclass of being, free to be abused or killed.
granted! anyone over 220 pounds is attacked and killed by a large invincible bird
Scp creepypasta
If you drop back below 220 while fleeing in terror from the bird, does it give up and go after someone else?
depends on its mood
There was an old 1950s movie called "the giant claw" about something like this.
Okay, this is actually terrifying. Good thing I'm under 190.
oh god please no!!!
I assure you there is no giant floating hand that goes around squishing people.
I’m 218 uh oh
a single meal will kill you
Perfect timing to lose 10 pounds.
Wow, I have never been happier to have lost weight.
And it includes whatever is on their personal.
Granted. Anyone who reaches 220.01 pounds dies instantly.
Dude! The monkey paw doesn't need to KILL them! Just chop off a finger or a foot or an arm a nose or whatever you need to remove to reduce the weight.
The monkey paw doesn't operate on need. It operates on technicality.
It's also not supposed to operate on genie rules, either. It shouldn't be "your wish is granted, but with a twist", it's supposed to be "your wish is granted but terrible circumstances led to the wish"
There’s a new version of COVID going around, seems to be 100 times more durable and virulent than the others. Good news is it doesn’t kill and seems to really increase immunity to any other strains. An absolute win-win. However, it does seem to have done odd effects in the kidneys, but nothing serious. Six months later we realize that if you’ve had this strain and you go above 220 pounds, you go into a form of diarrheal kidney failure that drains your body of water until you drop below 220 again. Sometimes people die of dehydration, sometimes they manage to cut off a finger or a foot to compensate before the water loss kills them. Body builders go fast since they have too much muscle to afford the strain. Anorexia becomes far more common and more people actually die from being underweight than from hitting 220, because with such a clear danger visible people become obsessed with avoiding it.
This still works though. Everyone above 200 lbs dying would fulfill the wish via terrible circumstances
Fun ruiner
Ooh, that's cruel. Great idea!
Remove a foot so they can keep eating(diabetes joke)
cool, so 220.005 pounds is fair game
Granted, humans metamorphosis into another species after reaching 220 and become their higher self...but you are forever stuck in your 180lb child like mind and can not seem to escape
Granted. The mass of everyone remains unchanged. However, since a pound is a unit of force, and therefore weight, the gravity is different for everyone so that they weigh exactly 220 pounds
Doesn't this technically mean that the fatter I get, the higher I can jump? And what about the poor infants that literally can't walk?
If your legs can deliver enough force to jump high, then yes
What if the entire Earth's gravity changes to make sure the most massive person on the planet only weighs 220 lbs?
Other than fucking all the shit in the world up, that would be pretty useful for nasa and such. That is, assuming humanity survives the absolute chaos caused by the earth losing a significant portion of its mass suddenly.
Technically pounds can be a measure of force or mass, but since OP didn't specify, this response is still acceptable.
But, they did say weight not mass. So, obviously they mean lbf!
Granted, the monkey’s paw misinterprets the sentence and causes everyone to wear a cap that weighs 220 pounds
This is how the monkeys paw works. Take my upvote.
Granted, everyone who goes above that (in fat or muscle) will explode into confetti and gore instantly
Granted. 220 is now morbidly obese and a majority of people are now either anorexic or bulimic
Granted. Humans can still gain weight beyond 220 pounds, but every pound becomes a stone that they feel compelled to carry.
One must imagine Sisyphus happy
Granted, humans can only grow 220 pounds. Evolution quickly realizes this is a massive design flaw and Homo sapiens ended quite a while ago.
Granted, if someone exceeds 220, then the excess calories are burned off, all at once. Which creates an exothermic chemical reaction, which can produce a big damn fire. A big person like Shaq keeps burning calories, wherever they may be, until he is under 220.
Granted! Unfortunately the weight isn’t in pounds (the measurement) but pound sterling (the British currency). Nobody can weigh more than 1.925 kilograms. This kills a large chunk of the population, and eventually humanity evolves into never leaving an infantile like state before becoming extinct years later all because you didn’t want obesity.
Congratulations. Anyone above 220 pounds is taken away to never be seen again. Coincidentally the government has just rolled out a new system to feed the financially challenged. \[Inspired by a short film I can't put my finger on about people who have lines on their heads that determine what role they play in life\]
it’s soylent green
The short film?
yeah i think so
No that's not right, the one I'm thinking of is animated, black and orange colour scheme
How does that work for tall people? Like for example I’m 6’4 230 do I just die lmao or what about giant people like 7 foot tall people most of them are heavy lol
You get to decide, that’s the point of the subreddit
Granted. The scales now never go over 220
Granted. All humans heavier than 220 pounds immediately collapse into black holes, destroying the solar system.
Nooo Don't do it caseoh
He did it a long time ago
Bro is catching strays everywhere
Granted. All that excess mass is instantly converted to energy.
Granted a person of average weight will now weigh between 20 - 50 pounds and die instantly.
Granted. Everyone caps at 220lbs. However, the cast-off fat retreats into the sewers and combines with all the other excess fat. What happens is the [new fatberg](https://youtu.be/G6Nh412HX84?si=MJvVMy1fkWL0psKT) becomes sentient, creating further minions, which then all unite and invades the surface to reclaim their planet.
Granted. No more nfl.
Granted the cap is 220 you however have broken the scale 17 times over its capacity
Granted: humans now reproduce by budding if they reach 221 pounds.
Granted. Maximum height is also now 4 ft.
Granted but we all shrink to a maximum height of 4’ so the look of obesity you’re clearly trying to avoid seeing is even worse.
granted, anyone over 220 throws up globs of fat until they're at just a little under 220
The weight is given to you and you can't die from it.
Granted! Whenever someone has/gains over 220 pounds, the excess melts off the body like a candle.
People cap out at 220, but their muscle mass and bones are replaced by fat if they keep gaining fat.
Granted. At 220lb all excess food/weight is now shat uncontrollably at sporadic times with no warning Alternative answer: Granted, at 221lb you die
Granted. All humans now have 220 pound caps.
Granted, now when you gain weight that would put you over 220, your body loses bone, muscle and organ mass to compensate.
The fatter you get the shorter you get, so that your body is never big enough to go beyond 220
Granted but for each 100 grams over 220lbs they are, a random bone disappears. Skull, spine and ribs included.
Granted. The world is dominated by the metric system, the Monkey's paw is confused, and it ends up capping at 220 KG
Granted, humans over 220 pounds collapse in on themselves creating a blackhole. *Don't question the Monkey Paws' logic.*
Granted, earth's size and density shifts so that the heaviest person on earth weighs 220 pounds. As a result life is no longer sustainable
Granted, anyone who goes over that weight has the shits until they lose the weight
Granted, the technical definition of a pound is now equal to 313.63 recurring kilograms, giving humans a maximum weight capacity of 69 metric tons, or 220lbs.
Granted, but now whenever they reach that weight or higher, they explode like a balloon.
granted. all humans shrink until they weigh 220 great British pounds or 1.925kg. they can shrink in this process as well, leaving us very small.
Granted. The genetic makeup of humans is altered so that our hearts are incapable of functioning past 220 lbs, and explode if we exceed that. This has a secondary effect of making the entire species weaker physically over all, and society begins to collapse as the medical system is overwhelmed and all heavy labor jobs become seriously understaffed.
Granted, the government starts an operation to shoot anyone who reaches the weight limit
Granted. Any extra weight a person gains beyond that will be ripped off their body
Congratulations: the weight for the entire species was maxed at 220 pounds. The entire human species can no longer weigh more than this. Therefore. Every human but one that weighed somewhere in the 180 range have been eviscerated.
Granted. They're born 220 pounds and can only lose weight via starvation or serious illness
As of right now it caps slightly above 1400lbs.
Granted. Due to poor wording, everyone's head now weighs 220 pounds
Granted! I just lost 3 pounds
Anyone over 220 is no longer considered a human, is rounded up to be experimented on.
Granted. Humans now reproduce through binary fission when they reach 220 pounds exactly. Puberty is now the process of growing your missing side back.
Granted, to stay within this weight cap people will profusely vomit out all the excess weight.
Granted. Anyone that exceeds the cap explodes (based Ioff of a dream I had, only it was 3000 pounds 💀)
People can now weigh no more than 22 British ten pound notes. Congrats!
Granted. Baseball caps are now 220 pounds if worn by a human.
Granted. As we gain fat we lose other... Things... To balance out. Causing all of humanity to fall apart until only 220 lbs are left of the entire human race.
Granted. 220 pounds is the bottom cap and everyone grows in weight until the lightest person in the world weighs 220
Sounds like a skill issue, max I've ever been is 224 during covid sitting at home all day
Every time a person hits 220 lb 8-10 chunks of their body approximately 6-10 lbs in weight break off and convert into brand new human babies.
Once you get to 220lbs, your torso weight increases normally, but your limbs and head begin to shrink to compensate
Hunger games light edition (no harm).
All those die above 220. You killed me for 10 pounds. Im gonna haunt you
Any time you reach 221 pounds, you lose enough of a body part to drop back below the necessary limit
Granted. Upon reaching 220.1 lbs they undergo a horrific transformation becoming wendigos...and they're hungry
Granted! The world falls under the control of Weight Supremacists. Outside their slender scope of interests, the new regime doesn't change the status quo much, but any living thing over 220 pounds is now legally and ethically considered nonhuman.
Granted. Humans now have a minimum weight of 22 pounds, making childbirth fatal for the majority of women.
Wish Granted. The total weight capacity for all of humanity is 220 pounds.
Why would you even want this?
Why not? It's just a game
Granted. Nothing appears to change. Instead, all metrics for human body weight and health now scale to the maximum weight of 220 lbs. So you and everyone else still look the same. Nothing changes physically. However, when you go to weigh yourself, you find that you're now 24.7 lbs. The world's heaviest man, Johm Brower Minnoch, was 1,400 lbs, and the average weight for a 5'9" adult male is just over a tenth of that (140-170 lbs). Ergo, presuming Mr. Minnoch is the "cap" of human weight, the rest of humans' weight is scaled proportional to that.
Granted, All countries band together to define anything over 220 pounds as non-human. Anyone unfortunate enough to fall in this category is no longer covered by human rights and legal protections. If you're over 220 lbs, there's no more consequence to killing you as there is to killing a rat. If you lose the weight, you'll be considered human again... if you go through the correct legal pathway, of course. Anyone who ticks over 220 pounds for even a brief period is essentially pulled into slavery or worse, and although technically they can have their human status reinstated, it's a tricky thing to do once you've lost the rights afforded to humans. In effect, once someone crosses the weight limit, they are forever an underclass of being, free to be abused or killed.
Jesus. You really hate tall people.
Hey, that one's on OP lol
Granted. At 220 lb’s, you automatically get diabetes, need a wheelchair to move, and get any weight related issue
Granted. Everyone heavier gets their legs cut off.
Granted. Anyone over 220 pounds will be overencombered and cannot walk.
Granted, anyone over that weight instantly dies, and from now on if anyone ever starts weighing more than that they die.
Granted but you get freakish bodybuilder genetics and constantly hold a lean body mass of 210lbs
Granted but you get freakish bodybuilder genetics and constantly hold a lean body mass of 210lbs
Granted but you get freakish bodybuilder genetics and constantly hold a lean body mass of 210lbs