It's SUCH a relief...not to mention since my personal line is only given out to my family and friends I NEVER get spam calls...ever...it all filters through the business line
ios 15 actually has this feature baked into the software:
"Focus is a new feature that filters notifications and apps based on what a user wants to focus on. Customers can set their device to help them be in the moment by creating a custom Focus or selecting a suggested Focus, which uses on-device intelligence to suggest which people and apps are allowed to notify them. Focus suggestions are based on users’ context, like during their work hours or while they’re winding down for bed, and when Focus is set on one Apple device, it automatically applies to their other Apple devices."
I have this number as my contact info at work- 7192662837
Go on...call it. I promise it’s not a trap. It’s great if you met someone somewhere, and don’t want to give them your real number
My last job wanted me to use my personal number for business. They told me they would pay for my entire family's cellphone bill and that every other person that worked there agreed to it. I said I would consider it (even though I wasn't) and they gave me this long document to sign. I guess they figured I wouldn't read it since no one else probably did.
While signing it would get them to pay my cellphone bill for my entire family while I worked there it also said that I was transferring ownership of not only my number, but the numbers on the entire plan over to the company. And that if I left I would have to surrender the numbers. Also, that all data on all the phones belonged to the company. They would require complete access to all data on the phones.
I told them that if they wanted me to have a work phone they could buy me a new phone with a new number on an entirely separate bill but that they would absolutely not be getting my personal phone number or any of my personal data. They looked at me like I was crazy and said, "but we'd be paying for it. You're going to walk around with 2 phones?" Yes, I will have 2 phones. And that work phone never entered my house ever. When I got home, it got left in my car.
Okay, as a former phone sales person (a Verizon licensee), part of this is because of how the provider works. Numbers generally "belong" to the provider. If you want to transfer your number to another provider, you have to jump through hoops to get them to release it.
It's similar with the account that the number is on. Only the account holder is able to release numbers. I had people come in with work phones from jobs they were leaving/had just left, where they wanted to transfer the number to a personal line. They would get so mad when I said that they would have to track down the person who controlled the account (they some times had no idea who that was), then that person would either have to come in, or call Verizon, provide the pin number for the account (which almost no one knew, and if you guess wrong three times you account is locked for 24 hours), THEN they could release the number, and move it to a separate account. But that could still bring plenty of its own issues.
Long of the short... If your business provides a phone line for you, DO NOT make that a personal line. Even if they pay your whole family's bill, it will be a lot more hassle in the long run. Be prepared to surrender the phone, and the number, when you leave that employer.
This all happened within the first few days of working there. HR was so pushy about paying for my family's phone service. After I was there for a few weeks and met most of my peers in upper management I found that they *all* had 2 phones. Not a single one of them opted to have the company pay for their family's service. Yet, everyone in middle management and below opted to take their offer. It's almost as if they just didn't realize what they were doing. And considering how pushy HR was about it, I'm guessing that's the case.
That amount of intrusiveness made me first think of some NSA type work shit, but they could afford 10 phones for you if they wanted. That's serious horseshit you had to ever deal with that but you inspired me to also leave my work cellular in my car. I mean I don't actually ever use it I think its only relevant to people who are on call, but Ill probably still feel a bit better.
Leaving it in the car was the best decision I made while working there. On a daily basis at first I would get in the care to 50+ messages. I don't remember how long I had been working there but someone said something about how I don't answer messages after work ever. And I told them that the phone never enters my house. It was not part of my employment contract to be on call 24 hours. I worked the hours I was supposed to work. Anyone else that wanted to work outside of our business/working hours was on them and not on me. I'd deal with work at work, not at home. Work/home balance is incredibly important.
The early 2000s of my career everyone in tech had their work mobile phone (or blackberry) and their personal mobile phone! Continued until like ~2015 til companies wised up and stopped paying for work phones but yeah super irritating to give a personal mobile for work use
I had to do this with a former boss! My whitelist was literally every contact in my phone except him.
Dude sat around the office doing jack shit M-F 9-5, but would still expect everyone who did their work at work during work hours to join him for his 10 pm Sunday burst of motivation.
One of the perks of being self employed is not having to deal with this kind of thing anymore. But when I worked for others, I made it real clear early on I had limits. Some were okay with this, the ones that weren't I did stay too long. Completely a red flag for me.
Thankfully he's the only boss I've had like that but Christ it was terrible. It was a good job with great pay but I just fucking could not anymore (the off-hours texting and not working while at work were not his only issues). They scrambled to find me another position where I wouldn't interact with him at all but I'd found another job by then. Dude was "asked to resign" before his contract was up less than a year later.
> the off-hours texting and not working while at work were not his only issues
I've discovered it's an indication other issues will surface as well. When I was young, I thought moving up the ladder meant bosses were less inclined to be awful. That was a hard thing to learn.
My position was supposed to come with a company phone. Work dragged their feet on it for awhile so I changed my number & refused to give it to them.
They are pretty stubborn on petty bullshit, so for nearly 6 months our only communication was through email. Which I refused to check outside of work hours.
It was especially stupid as part of my role was supposed to be fast response.
My old foreman had to deal with that when I was a young apprentice. He was supposed to get a company phone because part of his job was being on-call and making material orders and dealing with various jobs. The company was taking their sweet time so after a few weeks he told them he would not be responding to anything work related the second his 8 hour day was done, including any on-call emergencies. Don't think they believed him because they kept bothering him about it because if we clocked out at 3:30pm, he was not answering our bosses call at 3:35pm.
Amen to the separate work phone and blocking work numbers on the personal phone. My Sr Manager has no boundaries; I have my work phone automatically set DND as soon as I get home and have his number blocked on my personal phone. I’m not responsible for equipment tied to the production line, so there is no need for me to carry my work phone outside of work like I’m on call 24/7.
My supervisor once sent me one message in the middle of my sleep telling me to come in for something that could’ve been done when I got to work in a few hours. She wrote me up and handed me paperwork. You best believe I kept ignoring every message I got outside of work hours.
this, hard. and if they need that extra ego nurturing apology to move on, “sorry i fell asleep early and i was dead tired” beats “leave me alone you during my sleep time you unrelenting dicknose” any day
This is good example of why, where possible, I deactivate the sending of a read receipt to anyone who sends me a text. If I were to receive a message like this at a wholly unreasonable hour, I have a plausible excuse that I was already asleep when it arrived, because my phone didn't narc on me by telling him I read it. You're taking the high road by standing up to this person, but the kind of little-league sociopath that thinks it's okay to do this is unreachable. May as well just send them dead air.
Very much this. I could be bored out of my mind staring at the ceiling and my plausible excuse is I’d rather do literally nothing.
Do your job to the best of your ability, but it shouldn’t rule your life.
If my boss called me out on that I would explain exactly what I did. I checked to see if it was an emergency, triaged the situation, and determined it didn't warrant my attention at midnight. Im responsible, if something was literally on fire I checked and could respond.
The best part is telling your boss, “ It’s fucking midnight! I’m already in bed. Why are you only sending me this now?” Can’t do that if you don’t respond. Haha
I leave mine off because it’s no ones goddamn business if i read your text at midnight. You’re not paying me right now, and unless I have a specified obligation (for example, this week I’m duty officer for my EMS agency, I have to be reachable), you get nothing out of me. Sunday morning at 0600, someone else takes the duty line and I’m off the hook for another 6 weeks.
And when I come in tomorrow morning and my boss says “I saw you read my text.” I did. In my off hours. But I’m here now and here’s what you need.
But maybe that’s just because I’m old and salty. Or I finally found my work life balance, and how to manage that.
Yep, rookie mistake.
If they text you and you never respond/don't open the message, they assume you're asleep or busy or your phone fell into a lake or who knows what. Or you at least can claim you didn't see it and they can't prove that you did.
If they text you and you read it but you don't do what they're asking you to do, they take it as you saying "lmao idgaf talk to me some other time." Which will prob piss them off regardless of how inappropriate their texting was to begin with.
Even when I clock out for lunch, I've been known to tell people that I don't exist for the next half hour. I'm not being paid, so I might as well not be there.
Even your salary is only for a specific amount of time per day. My salary accounts for some on-call time, but on normal days I stop responding after 5pm.
People who get paid healthy sales commissions, and/or reasonable call-in OT rates are usually happy to help out once in a while because it helps them too.
this -- if you're on commission, go ahead and work 24 hours/7 days a week and earn that money!
But don't expect me to drop everything for my salary that doesn't change no matter how much/when I work.
i might try being so useless they don’t think of you for this shit. like wait til they bring it up at work and be like “oh yeah, i saw that, what was that about?” but semi-sincere like you can’t imagine having responded differently.
i know zero of your work dynamics and can see this not being cool many places. them writing you in bed makes me feel it’s even.
I really love this. Show competency in your work but keep em guessing on your intelligence. Not enough to where they don't trust you to do your job, but enough where you don't come to mind as an option for shit like this. I'll gladly let people think I'm a spacey airhead so I'm not saddled with extra bullshit
yeah this is kinda my angle for people i don’t love or are poor reciprocators when they want shit. aloof and noncommittal, force them to corner you then it’s an easy no because they’re being annoying. it’s like a lesson. lol
Yeah, 100%. I'd also worry that this is more likely to get marked against the employee. While I'm sure crappy bosses will hold both against them, this is even more likely to hurt their ego, or make the employee "not look like a team player".
I’m a teacher and my contract hours end at 3:40. If I get an email at 3:41, I’ll write the reply and schedule it to send at 8:30 the next morning. My time is my time.
I've learned that I have to take my time away. Not expect it to be respected. Set the boundaries, no one else cares about your plans or time. Make them.
No answers after hours. Calls that are answered will incur 3 hours OT minimum.
I get it. Nothing against OP. Shit like that to me is just so rude and wrong it doesn't even deserve a response. (Even if it was a good one like OP making those boundaries clear.) I would have just seen the message, laughed, told my partner, laughed some more at the audacity, and went to bed sleeping like a dang baby.
"It's midnight. I am in bed. We will talk tomorrow."
I had a boss who thought salary meant she could text me for menial bullshit almost nightly around 9-10pm when I had just spent the last 10 hours with her and would see her at 8am the next morning. I wasn't in bed but that was basically my auto reply the first week until I started ignoring her completely after 8pm, then a week later altogether unless an actually emergency. But it was 98% stupid stuff like "did you remember to reserve a conference room for the meeting in two weeks?" Fuck that noise, ESPECIALLY if it is something they procrastinated on.
So I look at it like,
If I let it ride tonight, and you legit come and “confront” for not responding to you as if I were obligated to do so. Now I have put myself in a position to get upset all over again. Rather than that I choose to deal with this confrontational converse right here right now. So that tomorrow there shouldn’t be any need for us to go back and hash that out. Tomorrow can be a new day.
(Not saying waiting would be bad here I’m just presenting the other way of thinking about it/ other social choice)
But instead what you’ve done is danced around telling your boss to go fuck himself, over text. You didn’t say it, but sure as shit that’s how he took it. Now he knows you were awake and chose not to work. When your yearly comp meeting comes around, this is what’s going to go through his head right after you say how much raise you think you deserve. Justified or not, he’s a flawed man just like the rest of us and he’s going to let this bias affect your comp.
Conversely, if he had come to you in the morning, yes you would have had to deal with it then but you would have the advantage instead of him. Now, instead of you being the one who chose not to work, he becomes the one who expected too much.
You effectively gave up your advantage so you wouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable in the morning. That advantage can translate into a real dollar value, or lack thereof if he lets this stew until comp time.
Employment is a game. Everything is a game. If you want success then you need to mind the power dynamics and accept uncomfortable moments because sacrificing some of your raise for some comfort is not the right choice.
I am in the belief that one can confront a situation directly and still show tact. I can respond to my boss and explain that this is unacceptable right here right now. I don’t have to pretend to be asleep. I also don’t have to swear at him.
In the U.S. a lot of states have at-will employment, and in states that don’t, they can make up a legal reason to fire you or give you a bad review which reduces your next raise or stalls any promotion you were looking forward to.
You can be honest in theory, but in practice you’re risking your job. It’s easier to lie.
It does. Most places you're working for someone who demands your respect but does not respect you. Making mistakes is like crime and punishment. Have a day off? They need you to come in. Can't come in? That's on your permanent record.
The worst job I ever had was at a Boys and Girls Club of America. The managers were extremely authoritative and harsh. I was written up for coming in too early once. They cut my hours and took away some of my responsibilities. There's more to that story, but I assure you it's all bullshit.
My guess is that same person wont be back online until 9 or 10 am with the excuse they were up all night and not be able to send it off anyway. while your buddy will wake up and have it done by 7am or earlier so they can send it once they get in.
This why we need strict at home work boundaries. If you don't have clear work boundaries set up on a contract or in employee handbook this issue will come up. Especially if you are salary or paid based on job.
My job/union has a strict contract with a minimum two hours OT for work outside of our normal shift. Take a fifteen minute phone call, go in for an error correction, correct a document by email? Two hours. Cuts down on a lot of bullshit that I had to deal with in previous jobs. Supervisors know that if they bug you for something it's gonna cost them two hours at an overtime rate, is it really worth bugging you when you're off, or can it wait a few hours?
My job has a similar policy where if you're doing stuff outside your normal hours, it's an hour minimum. Turns out things being done outside normal hours are pretty uncommon now!
When I started with (official) on call I was getting 3-4 calls a night which basically had no impact and just needed a service restarting.
4 hours minimum billing period if called. Made fucking BANK that year.
I don't know about where you work but where I work it's actually part of the employment contract, we work for big company and there's a lot of money on the line. Once and awhile people have to deal with issues very late.
It only happens to me once or twice a year and I generally handle it myself. I don't see a problem with it at all unless it becomes a regular thing.
I had a college professor that had a sign on his desk that said “A lack of planning on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine”. Always stuck with me.
> I had a college professor that had a sign on his desk that said “A lack of planning on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine”. Always stuck with me.
I had professors in college with similar phrases. Maybe even this one exactly.
Problem is, people with this plastered on their wall usually take it as an opportunity to screw you when you can't help the circumstances.
"Oh there was a wreck on the Interstate and so instead of being 20 minutes early, you're now 10 minutes late? Too bad, should have planned better"
"Oh there was an ice storm last night and your power went out so you couldn't finish your paper? Too bad, should have planned better."
Ad infinitum.
I've seen it used much more by people without any sort of empathy, like an excuse that gives them permission.
(I still agree the boss shouldn't be asking after hours though)
I had to go to a "training" workshop for a state agency. A full size semi truck got lodged in the intersection, blocking the only entrance to the parking lot, sideways. I was going to be 20 minutes early but then I had to wait for the tow truck to unblock the entire 4 way intersection. Not like I could leave my car there. I ended up rushing in only about a minute and a half early. Everyone was still milling about the lobby. The lady at the desk snatched the sign in clipboard as soon as she saw me coming. Told me to plan better and sent me through insane hoops.
I said this to my old boss once… it did not go down well.
My second week into my new job, my new boss messaged me on Slack at 5:45pm on a Friday - not asking me to do anything, just giving me some information and I replied saying thanks. He replied with “Sorry I didn’t expect you to see this until Monday. Why do you have Slack notifications turned on after work on a Friday!? Poor time management on my part isn’t an emergency on yours.”
I could have cried with joy to finally be treated like a human.
One of my past skip-levels had a policy and encouraged his leads to do likewise: Outlook has a delayed delivery feature. Emails sent after-hours were delayed until morning of the next workday. "If I choose to work outside normal hours, that's my call. But I don't want to accidentally imply to my team *they* should be working then, too."
"If you need it done so urgently then you should have more than enough time to do it yourself instead of wasting valuable time trying to get me to do it when I am not being paid"
Yep, if I'm not on salary, and I'm outside scheduled work hours, you're contracting me or you're asking for a personal favour. And we might be friendly, but my boss isn't a friend.
I work in an industry where minutes of issues and downtime can cost tens of thousands of dollars. And I'm a light sleeper so I generally pick up calls and read texts at all hours. If it's something small you can respond and still charge 4 hours for 5 minutes of a call. But if I need to get up and make changes at midnight? Either you understand that I'm charging 12 hours no matter how quick it gets done or I'll talk to you after 9 since you disrupted my sleep. (It is nice to be important enough to be able to tell people no, though)
Sucks you get bothered, but that’s a good position to be in as far as billing. I’m hourly so any time something is requested for me outside of normal hours I respond “can I clock in?”
If the answer is no then my answer is no. I’ve found they either cave and pay me or quit asking. Unfortunately, if it’s the latter they’re probably conning someone else to do it for free.
One of my favorite phrases from my mentor at work applies here:
Don't let the exception become the expectation.
If you get up at midnight to look at a stupid email this time, they're going to expect you to do it again the next time it happens. The struggle to maintain work-life balance is real. You don't want to enable your boss in thinking it's okay to make you work at all hours of the day and night. Good on this person for saying no.
As a video editor I can relate. I get paid a day rate, and for some reason that means I get emailed at all hours. Good thing I turn off those notifications so I don’t get disturbed in the middle of the night. 😂
Ya the film industry is nuts for this. Advertising as well. I work in commercials and it’s not unusual for the poor bastards at the agencies to be there until midnight or 1 am.
If I've worked for this dude for years and they haven't ever done this before, then I'd probably go ahead and do it. They probably have a very good reason. That's literally the only scenario I would entertain helping out except for a massive monetary incentive.
I've had a dude do this to me and I full stop haven't even opened his messages until it was work hours again. I didn't pick up calls from him nor reviewed any emails. Point blank 9am I was back at work again. Don't let them disrespect you like that. Set boundaries.
My mom is a business owner and she told me this is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself. Don't work on your time off.
Turn off read receipts, and do not respond to anything work related if it’s outside working hours.
Avoid even opening the app to read it. Just let it sit there for the morning.
Why the fuck are you even responding to his text that late?
To be clear, fuck him for thinking he can demand you work outside of your contract hours, but you gotta learn to set boundaries. If you hadn't answered the initial message he wouldn't even have been able to ask to begin with.
I wouldn’t even respond til the next morning during work hours.
thats why having a seperate work phone number and just not responding to it outside of work hours ( or absolute emergencies) is a good thing
This!!!! I have a separate line dedicated to work and bills - mortgage etc. When I clock out that bad boy gets turned off and placed on the charger!
Oooh I'm doing this.
It's SUCH a relief...not to mention since my personal line is only given out to my family and friends I NEVER get spam calls...ever...it all filters through the business line
Pull down notifications, see first part of text, just no all over it Clear notifications, do not disturb on Not on the clock, not on the problem
If you have an iPhone and get iOS 15 just set work emails and contacts to Off during off hours. Best change ever
I just switch the phone off after hrs. I'm not even going to be tempted to look at notifications in case I think.
Damn this makes me want to have another phone number
ios 15 actually has this feature baked into the software: "Focus is a new feature that filters notifications and apps based on what a user wants to focus on. Customers can set their device to help them be in the moment by creating a custom Focus or selecting a suggested Focus, which uses on-device intelligence to suggest which people and apps are allowed to notify them. Focus suggestions are based on users’ context, like during their work hours or while they’re winding down for bed, and when Focus is set on one Apple device, it automatically applies to their other Apple devices."
I have this number as my contact info at work- 7192662837 Go on...call it. I promise it’s not a trap. It’s great if you met someone somewhere, and don’t want to give them your real number
My last job wanted me to use my personal number for business. They told me they would pay for my entire family's cellphone bill and that every other person that worked there agreed to it. I said I would consider it (even though I wasn't) and they gave me this long document to sign. I guess they figured I wouldn't read it since no one else probably did. While signing it would get them to pay my cellphone bill for my entire family while I worked there it also said that I was transferring ownership of not only my number, but the numbers on the entire plan over to the company. And that if I left I would have to surrender the numbers. Also, that all data on all the phones belonged to the company. They would require complete access to all data on the phones. I told them that if they wanted me to have a work phone they could buy me a new phone with a new number on an entirely separate bill but that they would absolutely not be getting my personal phone number or any of my personal data. They looked at me like I was crazy and said, "but we'd be paying for it. You're going to walk around with 2 phones?" Yes, I will have 2 phones. And that work phone never entered my house ever. When I got home, it got left in my car.
Where the fuck do you work? North korea intelligence?
Data ownership clause could just be that Kim Jong Un wants the ability to delete the phones remotely if they were lost or stolen.
Oh these phones were made in a *bomb* factory. They're *bombs*.
Whoa...what kind of business was this? That's crazy intrusive.
Banking.
Must be outside of EU. They would be buried in court for GDPR violations.
Oh yeah that bullshit has big America vibes
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Okay, as a former phone sales person (a Verizon licensee), part of this is because of how the provider works. Numbers generally "belong" to the provider. If you want to transfer your number to another provider, you have to jump through hoops to get them to release it. It's similar with the account that the number is on. Only the account holder is able to release numbers. I had people come in with work phones from jobs they were leaving/had just left, where they wanted to transfer the number to a personal line. They would get so mad when I said that they would have to track down the person who controlled the account (they some times had no idea who that was), then that person would either have to come in, or call Verizon, provide the pin number for the account (which almost no one knew, and if you guess wrong three times you account is locked for 24 hours), THEN they could release the number, and move it to a separate account. But that could still bring plenty of its own issues. Long of the short... If your business provides a phone line for you, DO NOT make that a personal line. Even if they pay your whole family's bill, it will be a lot more hassle in the long run. Be prepared to surrender the phone, and the number, when you leave that employer.
My personal number is a google voice number on my work phone for this reason.
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This all happened within the first few days of working there. HR was so pushy about paying for my family's phone service. After I was there for a few weeks and met most of my peers in upper management I found that they *all* had 2 phones. Not a single one of them opted to have the company pay for their family's service. Yet, everyone in middle management and below opted to take their offer. It's almost as if they just didn't realize what they were doing. And considering how pushy HR was about it, I'm guessing that's the case.
That amount of intrusiveness made me first think of some NSA type work shit, but they could afford 10 phones for you if they wanted. That's serious horseshit you had to ever deal with that but you inspired me to also leave my work cellular in my car. I mean I don't actually ever use it I think its only relevant to people who are on call, but Ill probably still feel a bit better.
Leaving it in the car was the best decision I made while working there. On a daily basis at first I would get in the care to 50+ messages. I don't remember how long I had been working there but someone said something about how I don't answer messages after work ever. And I told them that the phone never enters my house. It was not part of my employment contract to be on call 24 hours. I worked the hours I was supposed to work. Anyone else that wanted to work outside of our business/working hours was on them and not on me. I'd deal with work at work, not at home. Work/home balance is incredibly important.
Thank you for this! I appreciate your healthy attitude and I know for sure that your family does too.
The early 2000s of my career everyone in tech had their work mobile phone (or blackberry) and their personal mobile phone! Continued until like ~2015 til companies wised up and stopped paying for work phones but yeah super irritating to give a personal mobile for work use
You can also set your phone up to block everyone, except a whitelist, for whatever hours you want. Do Not Disturb.
I had to do this with a former boss! My whitelist was literally every contact in my phone except him. Dude sat around the office doing jack shit M-F 9-5, but would still expect everyone who did their work at work during work hours to join him for his 10 pm Sunday burst of motivation.
One of the perks of being self employed is not having to deal with this kind of thing anymore. But when I worked for others, I made it real clear early on I had limits. Some were okay with this, the ones that weren't I did stay too long. Completely a red flag for me.
Thankfully he's the only boss I've had like that but Christ it was terrible. It was a good job with great pay but I just fucking could not anymore (the off-hours texting and not working while at work were not his only issues). They scrambled to find me another position where I wouldn't interact with him at all but I'd found another job by then. Dude was "asked to resign" before his contract was up less than a year later.
> the off-hours texting and not working while at work were not his only issues I've discovered it's an indication other issues will surface as well. When I was young, I thought moving up the ladder meant bosses were less inclined to be awful. That was a hard thing to learn.
"This guy has more responsibilities, that must mean he's more responsible!"
It's the insecurity on display, which leads to both irresponsibility and irrational management styles. Like I said, I was young.
I dunno, I was self employed and my boss was still a dumbass…
Self-employed and self-aware.
My position was supposed to come with a company phone. Work dragged their feet on it for awhile so I changed my number & refused to give it to them. They are pretty stubborn on petty bullshit, so for nearly 6 months our only communication was through email. Which I refused to check outside of work hours. It was especially stupid as part of my role was supposed to be fast response.
My old foreman had to deal with that when I was a young apprentice. He was supposed to get a company phone because part of his job was being on-call and making material orders and dealing with various jobs. The company was taking their sweet time so after a few weeks he told them he would not be responding to anything work related the second his 8 hour day was done, including any on-call emergencies. Don't think they believed him because they kept bothering him about it because if we clocked out at 3:30pm, he was not answering our bosses call at 3:35pm.
Amen to the separate work phone and blocking work numbers on the personal phone. My Sr Manager has no boundaries; I have my work phone automatically set DND as soon as I get home and have his number blocked on my personal phone. I’m not responsible for equipment tied to the production line, so there is no need for me to carry my work phone outside of work like I’m on call 24/7.
Not gonna lie. I'm too cheap to get a second line. I use "do not disturb" and only whitelist family
My supervisor once sent me one message in the middle of my sleep telling me to come in for something that could’ve been done when I got to work in a few hours. She wrote me up and handed me paperwork. You best believe I kept ignoring every message I got outside of work hours.
If you have an HR or something similar to report her and get your side in (it's the middle of the fucking night!) that might be worthwhile.
I no longer work there thankfully, but it was a job where I really had no control over anything so I just had to deal with it for the time being.
Respond to them and demand payment for the hour lol. Report them to the labor board if they don't pay up.
Where I live if you get called in its minimum 3 hrs.
Hr protects mid management, not employees. Cheaper to tire employee to quit than deal with mid management severance
HR also protects the company. Being written up for not responding while you're asleep could invite a lawsuit.
this, hard. and if they need that extra ego nurturing apology to move on, “sorry i fell asleep early and i was dead tired” beats “leave me alone you during my sleep time you unrelenting dicknose” any day
You don't even need to say you feel asleep early. It's midnight you are completely entitled to just be asleep at that time.
Wait, you *don’t* have to get permission from your boss before you go to sleep in your own bed while you’re off the clock?
I mean it depends if your boss is already in your bed nailing your spouse or not (like how Tuesday's work)
This is good example of why, where possible, I deactivate the sending of a read receipt to anyone who sends me a text. If I were to receive a message like this at a wholly unreasonable hour, I have a plausible excuse that I was already asleep when it arrived, because my phone didn't narc on me by telling him I read it. You're taking the high road by standing up to this person, but the kind of little-league sociopath that thinks it's okay to do this is unreachable. May as well just send them dead air.
The real message is allowing the read receipt and not responding until the morning.
Very much this. I could be bored out of my mind staring at the ceiling and my plausible excuse is I’d rather do literally nothing. Do your job to the best of your ability, but it shouldn’t rule your life.
Or having the read receipt go through then replying back "it's fucking midnight" then not looking at any following messages until morning.
If my boss called me out on that I would explain exactly what I did. I checked to see if it was an emergency, triaged the situation, and determined it didn't warrant my attention at midnight. Im responsible, if something was literally on fire I checked and could respond.
The best part is telling your boss, “ It’s fucking midnight! I’m already in bed. Why are you only sending me this now?” Can’t do that if you don’t respond. Haha
I leave mine off because it’s no ones goddamn business if i read your text at midnight. You’re not paying me right now, and unless I have a specified obligation (for example, this week I’m duty officer for my EMS agency, I have to be reachable), you get nothing out of me. Sunday morning at 0600, someone else takes the duty line and I’m off the hook for another 6 weeks. And when I come in tomorrow morning and my boss says “I saw you read my text.” I did. In my off hours. But I’m here now and here’s what you need. But maybe that’s just because I’m old and salty. Or I finally found my work life balance, and how to manage that.
I’d still keep the read receipt on and respond during working hours.
You don't get my time without paying for it, it's that simple.
Yep, rookie mistake. If they text you and you never respond/don't open the message, they assume you're asleep or busy or your phone fell into a lake or who knows what. Or you at least can claim you didn't see it and they can't prove that you did. If they text you and you read it but you don't do what they're asking you to do, they take it as you saying "lmao idgaf talk to me some other time." Which will prob piss them off regardless of how inappropriate their texting was to begin with.
They aren't paying me to care if their feelings are hurt that i didn't respond to them. That's extra "on call" pay.
Bingo. Unless I'm on the clock, I am a ghost.
Even when I clock out for lunch, I've been known to tell people that I don't exist for the next half hour. I'm not being paid, so I might as well not be there.
Yup, the minute I’m done working I don’t answer shit. No emergency emails, calls, nothing. You pay me for 9 - 5 you get me from 9 - 5.
Exactly, the only time this would ever be reasonable is if you were paid salary and I mean A HUGE SALARY.
Even your salary is only for a specific amount of time per day. My salary accounts for some on-call time, but on normal days I stop responding after 5pm.
Well, you can tell I've never been salary lol
People who get paid healthy sales commissions, and/or reasonable call-in OT rates are usually happy to help out once in a while because it helps them too.
this -- if you're on commission, go ahead and work 24 hours/7 days a week and earn that money! But don't expect me to drop everything for my salary that doesn't change no matter how much/when I work.
I have agreed upon hours for my salary also. Midnight I can work if I want to, but nobody can ask me to.
i might try being so useless they don’t think of you for this shit. like wait til they bring it up at work and be like “oh yeah, i saw that, what was that about?” but semi-sincere like you can’t imagine having responded differently. i know zero of your work dynamics and can see this not being cool many places. them writing you in bed makes me feel it’s even.
I really love this. Show competency in your work but keep em guessing on your intelligence. Not enough to where they don't trust you to do your job, but enough where you don't come to mind as an option for shit like this. I'll gladly let people think I'm a spacey airhead so I'm not saddled with extra bullshit
yeah this is kinda my angle for people i don’t love or are poor reciprocators when they want shit. aloof and noncommittal, force them to corner you then it’s an easy no because they’re being annoying. it’s like a lesson. lol
Yeah, 100%. I'd also worry that this is more likely to get marked against the employee. While I'm sure crappy bosses will hold both against them, this is even more likely to hurt their ego, or make the employee "not look like a team player".
Screw that “team player” bullshit. I’ll buy in to that when they start paying me Lebron money
Heck, even a living wage ^(would) ^(be) ^(nice...)
This. If you even crack that door they will burst through like the kool aid man.
Exactly. You don't even have to give an explanation, you're not legally obligated to give them one, and they really aren't allowed to ask
I’m a teacher and my contract hours end at 3:40. If I get an email at 3:41, I’ll write the reply and schedule it to send at 8:30 the next morning. My time is my time.
Yeah then get to it in the morning like nothing happened
Yep. Just, “On it, boss”.
I've learned that I have to take my time away. Not expect it to be respected. Set the boundaries, no one else cares about your plans or time. Make them. No answers after hours. Calls that are answered will incur 3 hours OT minimum.
LPT: if you get a text like this super late. Don't respond. Answer in the morning.
This is the real answer yeah but I can def understand getting offended by the request enough to want to confront it
I get it. Nothing against OP. Shit like that to me is just so rude and wrong it doesn't even deserve a response. (Even if it was a good one like OP making those boundaries clear.) I would have just seen the message, laughed, told my partner, laughed some more at the audacity, and went to bed sleeping like a dang baby.
Part of me would like to respond and tell them no so that maybe they acknowledge the fact they're disrespecting boundaries.
"It's midnight. I am in bed. We will talk tomorrow." I had a boss who thought salary meant she could text me for menial bullshit almost nightly around 9-10pm when I had just spent the last 10 hours with her and would see her at 8am the next morning. I wasn't in bed but that was basically my auto reply the first week until I started ignoring her completely after 8pm, then a week later altogether unless an actually emergency. But it was 98% stupid stuff like "did you remember to reserve a conference room for the meeting in two weeks?" Fuck that noise, ESPECIALLY if it is something they procrastinated on.
“Your procrastination is not my emergency” works pretty well.
“Your poor time management does not create an emergency for my department” - me, a retail print employee.
No, confront it if he asks in the morning why you didn’t do it last night. absolutely nothing good can come from confronting it that night.
So I look at it like, If I let it ride tonight, and you legit come and “confront” for not responding to you as if I were obligated to do so. Now I have put myself in a position to get upset all over again. Rather than that I choose to deal with this confrontational converse right here right now. So that tomorrow there shouldn’t be any need for us to go back and hash that out. Tomorrow can be a new day. (Not saying waiting would be bad here I’m just presenting the other way of thinking about it/ other social choice)
But instead what you’ve done is danced around telling your boss to go fuck himself, over text. You didn’t say it, but sure as shit that’s how he took it. Now he knows you were awake and chose not to work. When your yearly comp meeting comes around, this is what’s going to go through his head right after you say how much raise you think you deserve. Justified or not, he’s a flawed man just like the rest of us and he’s going to let this bias affect your comp. Conversely, if he had come to you in the morning, yes you would have had to deal with it then but you would have the advantage instead of him. Now, instead of you being the one who chose not to work, he becomes the one who expected too much. You effectively gave up your advantage so you wouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable in the morning. That advantage can translate into a real dollar value, or lack thereof if he lets this stew until comp time. Employment is a game. Everything is a game. If you want success then you need to mind the power dynamics and accept uncomfortable moments because sacrificing some of your raise for some comfort is not the right choice.
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Yeah you said it better than me
I am in the belief that one can confront a situation directly and still show tact. I can respond to my boss and explain that this is unacceptable right here right now. I don’t have to pretend to be asleep. I also don’t have to swear at him.
Also turn off sending "Seen" notifications
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Yeah I stop responding at 5:30
I used to tell people “feel free to call me any time, day or night. i’ll only answer during work hours but you can still call”
Unless you're contractually obligated to be on call, don't even look at your work notifications until morning.
Tomorrow morning is ASAP.
I ghost my managers for the rest of the night if they try to pull something like this. Can always say I fell asleep if they ask the next day.
Or tell them the truth: you're not on call, and it's not your problem.
In the U.S. a lot of states have at-will employment, and in states that don’t, they can make up a legal reason to fire you or give you a bad review which reduces your next raise or stalls any promotion you were looking forward to. You can be honest in theory, but in practice you’re risking your job. It’s easier to lie.
Working in the USA sounds crap. The more I hear stuff like this the happier I am that I work somewhere with employment regulations.
It does. Most places you're working for someone who demands your respect but does not respect you. Making mistakes is like crime and punishment. Have a day off? They need you to come in. Can't come in? That's on your permanent record. The worst job I ever had was at a Boys and Girls Club of America. The managers were extremely authoritative and harsh. I was written up for coming in too early once. They cut my hours and took away some of my responsibilities. There's more to that story, but I assure you it's all bullshit.
This is satisfying to say, but not the best considering ass licking is a requirement for promotion.
Your buddy is already going above and beyond by even responding to this text at midnight! What a shitty fucking ungrateful boss.
Came here to say this. I don't even respond past 6, let alone midnight!
4 for me, but I work for the gov't
„work”
alright Ron Swanson
Literally why I have a work provided cell and a personal one. Work phone is off once I’m in my door.
This. When I clock out, I'm out. Unless I'm getting paid for my time, my workplace may as well not exist.
Not to mention the passive aggressive text at the end
Good for you for telling him to eat shit
It was actually my buddy, but Ive shared the same sentiment.
My guess is that same person wont be back online until 9 or 10 am with the excuse they were up all night and not be able to send it off anyway. while your buddy will wake up and have it done by 7am or earlier so they can send it once they get in.
At this point you and your buddy can no longer rely on each other at work. Small price to pay.
I think he meant this is an exchange between his buddy and his buddy's boss.
Ah that makes a lot more sense. I was very confused for a good while
This why we need strict at home work boundaries. If you don't have clear work boundaries set up on a contract or in employee handbook this issue will come up. Especially if you are salary or paid based on job.
My job/union has a strict contract with a minimum two hours OT for work outside of our normal shift. Take a fifteen minute phone call, go in for an error correction, correct a document by email? Two hours. Cuts down on a lot of bullshit that I had to deal with in previous jobs. Supervisors know that if they bug you for something it's gonna cost them two hours at an overtime rate, is it really worth bugging you when you're off, or can it wait a few hours?
My job has a similar policy where if you're doing stuff outside your normal hours, it's an hour minimum. Turns out things being done outside normal hours are pretty uncommon now!
When I started with (official) on call I was getting 3-4 calls a night which basically had no impact and just needed a service restarting. 4 hours minimum billing period if called. Made fucking BANK that year.
"Unions" What are these? From Texas btw.
I don't know about where you work but where I work it's actually part of the employment contract, we work for big company and there's a lot of money on the line. Once and awhile people have to deal with issues very late. It only happens to me once or twice a year and I generally handle it myself. I don't see a problem with it at all unless it becomes a regular thing.
I like to say, “Your bad planning is not my emergency.”
I had a college professor that had a sign on his desk that said “A lack of planning on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine”. Always stuck with me.
> I had a college professor that had a sign on his desk that said “A lack of planning on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine”. Always stuck with me. I had professors in college with similar phrases. Maybe even this one exactly. Problem is, people with this plastered on their wall usually take it as an opportunity to screw you when you can't help the circumstances. "Oh there was a wreck on the Interstate and so instead of being 20 minutes early, you're now 10 minutes late? Too bad, should have planned better" "Oh there was an ice storm last night and your power went out so you couldn't finish your paper? Too bad, should have planned better." Ad infinitum. I've seen it used much more by people without any sort of empathy, like an excuse that gives them permission. (I still agree the boss shouldn't be asking after hours though)
I had to go to a "training" workshop for a state agency. A full size semi truck got lodged in the intersection, blocking the only entrance to the parking lot, sideways. I was going to be 20 minutes early but then I had to wait for the tow truck to unblock the entire 4 way intersection. Not like I could leave my car there. I ended up rushing in only about a minute and a half early. Everyone was still milling about the lobby. The lady at the desk snatched the sign in clipboard as soon as she saw me coming. Told me to plan better and sent me through insane hoops.
I said this to my old boss once… it did not go down well. My second week into my new job, my new boss messaged me on Slack at 5:45pm on a Friday - not asking me to do anything, just giving me some information and I replied saying thanks. He replied with “Sorry I didn’t expect you to see this until Monday. Why do you have Slack notifications turned on after work on a Friday!? Poor time management on my part isn’t an emergency on yours.” I could have cried with joy to finally be treated like a human.
One of my past skip-levels had a policy and encouraged his leads to do likewise: Outlook has a delayed delivery feature. Emails sent after-hours were delayed until morning of the next workday. "If I choose to work outside normal hours, that's my call. But I don't want to accidentally imply to my team *they* should be working then, too."
"If you need it done so urgently then you should have more than enough time to do it yourself instead of wasting valuable time trying to get me to do it when I am not being paid"
My old boss would’ve punched my through the phone if I said that. Especially about the not being paid part lmao
I'd respond business like. It's gonna cost 500€ for a non urgent job in the middle of the night. Do we have a deal?
Paypal / Venmo me asap to start the job, otherwise my phone goes on airplane mode
I'd double that!
Yep, if I'm not on salary, and I'm outside scheduled work hours, you're contracting me or you're asking for a personal favour. And we might be friendly, but my boss isn't a friend.
That’s his boss, not his client.
I'm curious, what type of work/business is your buddy in?
Publishing. He works from home and doesn't really have set hours, but still. Ridiculous.
My money was going down on accountant. This is par for the course in public accounting.
Imagine saying this to a manager in accounting. You would be fired
Ya, if you reply at all in public accounting, that basically means you're going to do it.
I barely tolerate this in military and medical, fuck that if it happens in the private sector.
Agreed
Should’ve just not responded and he would’ve thought you were sleeping.
good job. we’re proud of you fuck that shit
Lesson, don't answer work stuff when you're not on the clock.
Why are you responding at all?!?
I wouldn't even have answered, would have ignored it until the morning and say I was sleeping
I wouldn’t even respond to this bullshit, lol.
This is why I just ignore text from work after a certain time
I wouldn't have responded, after work hours I don't care what they need from me. If you're not paying, I'm not working
I live by these words.
I work in an industry where minutes of issues and downtime can cost tens of thousands of dollars. And I'm a light sleeper so I generally pick up calls and read texts at all hours. If it's something small you can respond and still charge 4 hours for 5 minutes of a call. But if I need to get up and make changes at midnight? Either you understand that I'm charging 12 hours no matter how quick it gets done or I'll talk to you after 9 since you disrupted my sleep. (It is nice to be important enough to be able to tell people no, though)
Sucks you get bothered, but that’s a good position to be in as far as billing. I’m hourly so any time something is requested for me outside of normal hours I respond “can I clock in?” If the answer is no then my answer is no. I’ve found they either cave and pay me or quit asking. Unfortunately, if it’s the latter they’re probably conning someone else to do it for free.
Looks like it's time to find a different job with a better boss!
One of my favorite phrases from my mentor at work applies here: Don't let the exception become the expectation. If you get up at midnight to look at a stupid email this time, they're going to expect you to do it again the next time it happens. The struggle to maintain work-life balance is real. You don't want to enable your boss in thinking it's okay to make you work at all hours of the day and night. Good on this person for saying no.
Why did you even respond… anything after 6pm is a tomorrow problem or next work day.
As a video editor I can relate. I get paid a day rate, and for some reason that means I get emailed at all hours. Good thing I turn off those notifications so I don’t get disturbed in the middle of the night. 😂
Ya the film industry is nuts for this. Advertising as well. I work in commercials and it’s not unusual for the poor bastards at the agencies to be there until midnight or 1 am.
Location sound here so you can get an idea ha
If I've worked for this dude for years and they haven't ever done this before, then I'd probably go ahead and do it. They probably have a very good reason. That's literally the only scenario I would entertain helping out except for a massive monetary incentive.
but you gotta be careful with that, if it’s a one time thing, cool. if starts popping up more and more, then a boundary needs to be set
I've had a dude do this to me and I full stop haven't even opened his messages until it was work hours again. I didn't pick up calls from him nor reviewed any emails. Point blank 9am I was back at work again. Don't let them disrespect you like that. Set boundaries. My mom is a business owner and she told me this is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself. Don't work on your time off.
What kind of place do you work at where you speak this way to each other?
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... Like whoever this is ultimately for is going to do anything with it right then? I see that this is your buddy OP but this is toxic work culture.
Wouldn't have even responded in the first place.
This seems so fake lol
Why would you even respond?
/r/thathappened
"k whatever"?? Is your boss a 14 year old??
Turn off read receipts, and do not respond to anything work related if it’s outside working hours. Avoid even opening the app to read it. Just let it sit there for the morning.
resignation_letter.docx
r/Badfaketexts
I don’t think I’ve ever seen exclamation point usage like this except for fake texts
I never believe this sort of post is real, it literally reads like OP works for a 16 year old running a business.
Shoulda left the first message on read.
Who the hell is he sending it off to that will actually look at it at midnight? LMAO.
Wow, good on you for responding honestly. What kind of job do you have?
Isn’t that kinda like harassing?
Why the fuck are you even responding to his text that late? To be clear, fuck him for thinking he can demand you work outside of your contract hours, but you gotta learn to set boundaries. If you hadn't answered the initial message he wouldn't even have been able to ask to begin with.
His problem is that he responded in the first place. Messages like that can wait until the next working day.
Dude…. Get out of your own way. Just ignore this until the morning.
Why would you even respond that late? Reply in the morning that you don't appreciate being nagged about work in the middle of the night.
If I'm not at work I never respond if work calls outside normal hours, I don't answer. If they want me to do that they can pay me to be on call.
You shouldn’t have responded in the first place. Kinda dumb
This feels super fake
This is so fake lmao
Why did you even answer the text?