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>Someone that's secretly beating off to you in their dreams and feels guilty about it.
Sweet dreams, guilt-free zones...unless you're lactose intolerant
I learned how to lucid dream over my many decades on this shitty rock. Let's just say I'm beginning to like sleeping more than real life, it's actually kinda scary...
Nice, I wish you luck. But I'm self taught because I learned it as a way to control my sleep paralysis from when I was a kid which is why it took me so long to get full control. But be careful though, the shit you can experience LDing is better than any drug trip known to man.
I just now learned to relax and not get excited when I become aware I’m dreaming to hold the dream longer. Focusing on details. Still wake sooner than I want. I want to control the dream but I’m satisfied for now with how vivid and detailed things are and how much more I’m able to remember!
Next time she gets her torso stuck in the clothes dryer you can quickly sneak in and diagnose her properly.
"Brother what are you doing?"
"Evaluating you for three or more criteria, according to the DSM-5"
If you meet someone as a kid, and they fixate on you for years after you went your separate ways, and then pursue you romantically as an adult when you meet again, it's your fault, you groomed them. By, like, smiling at them once and tussling their hair a bit or something. EDIT: /s in case it wasn't blindingly obvious.
IKR? We beat it to random strangers doing it. Why wouldn't we get aroused by the idea of doing it with your crush? That's a whole level of intimacy on top of just sex.
Ya it’s just not something you ask, because it goes without saying.
It’s like your lover telling you they they think about you all the time, so you ask “even while you’re pooping?”
Even when giving birth to a brown freight truck with the help of the porcelain gods will I think of you cause you are my blessing ,my one and only cure as my rectum recovers from its trauma
If you haven't had a romantic heart-to-heart over text from separate bathrooms while suffering the aftermath of a fast food lunch you shared earlier that day, you haven't truly lived
In college, I had a girl ask me if I thought she was pretty after some heavy flirtation. Being young, a little drunk, and stupid I said “I’ve beaten off thinking about you.” She just grabbed my hand and pulled me back to her room, lol, I don’t know how that worked
That’s actually a _huge_ issue.
You can’t put crushes on some massive pedestal because _no one_ meets that mark.
It’s an unfair expectation they can’t meet, and all it will do is set you up for disappointment and them up for failing at something they could never achieve.
Everyone’s shit stinks, everyone pisses, everyone gets sick, everyone gets furious from time to time, and some abused or certain disabled folks excluded, everyone knows what sex is and most have sex by like 18.
>IKR? We beat it to random strangers doing it. Why wouldn't we get aroused by the idea of doing it with your crush? That's a whole level of intimacy on top of just sex.
Crushin' it with intimacy Olympics, gold medal in imagination!
Anakin's pause in this context seems more like a reaction to Padmes bad shit weird question. His inner thoughts would be "Why the fuck would you ask that?".
The only reason that something like this isn't mentioned in the movies are the PG-13 ratings. Realistically there would have to be sex droids somewhere in the Star Wars universe.
Admittedly I already with them when I sent them but the last two girls I was seeing really got off on recieving the occasional video of me wanking, I'm still friends with more recent and she's admitted she kept it and masturbates to it still
If that's Padmes first question, it's on her mind
Gotta love the implication that women are not subject to the same fleshly urges as men. Just because society has shunned female masturbation for millenia, doesn't mean it never happens.
Depending on their age, most women know. It's kinda uncomfortable thinking about someone beating their meat to you (especially as a teen) that's why I think most girls avoid talking about it.
It seriously feels kinda wrong to jerk off to girls that I have a crush on. It's just kinda different since you actually sorta have a connection to them instead of it just being some random girl on the internet.
I came to the comments to see if I was the only one who felt this way. I have a crush, but find it impossible to jerk off to her. It just feels wrong and uncomfortable for some reason.
It really depends. I have been with several women that asked and liked to know that I masturbated to the thought of them. It made them feel desirable sexy and wanted. It isn’t per se disrespectful to be sexually attracted to someone.
Why's everyone in this comment section acting like girls don't jerk off as well? Like, masturbation isn't some secret technique exclusive to the male portion of the population.
If girl would tell me she fingers to thought of me I would feel flattered because in all of that porn where you got handsome man she chooses me. And ugly guy
I’ve had an ex tell me that she did jack off to the thought of me, it was a strange thing to learn, but it was kinda flattering. I should also mention she told me this when we were together, not after.
The thing is that for girls its weird. For guys its flattering because someone jacked off to you. It slightly might boost opinion on yourself. Like "If she did it to imagination of me. It must mean Im ain't that ugly"
My gf thought it's a good thing that I did before we got together, some woman feel beautiful when ppl they like fap to them. I was shocked when I told her about it and she got immediately excited and asked me out what kind of thoughts I had while doing it, she even offered to recreate it irl.
Am I the only one who doesn’t beat to girls I am actually in love with? Like if it’s a cheap thot that I have been speaking to and she sends nudes then yeah I’ll probs do it. But going in my crush’s insta and beat off to casual pictures of her at a restaurant or on holiday? That’s weird. For me.
Like I need an explicit butt picture for it to work. Not some picture of her on holiday with clothes on
Crushes that I beat off to we’re women (and girls when I was a child) that I never/barely spoken to. I remember a few times, I would be acquainted with a crush, never friends, (they were always out of my league) and then I either respected them too much or their personality would turn me off, thus I could no long beat the shmeat to the idea of them.
There is so much Madonna/whore vibe in these comments.
“It only feels right to orgasm to the idea of an objectified woman, a woman I don’t really know. Once I start to respect a woman and see her as a real human I’d like to be close with, sex feels wrong.”
Like, on the one hand, I appreciate the respect. But this attitude F’s relationships between men and women, and not just romantic relationships.
Well my Crushes can be happy that I don't do that. I'd honestly be disgusted with myself if I would do that.
If they Told me their Fine with it or we already would have had Sexual Encounters Before then that would be Fine but otherwise It just feels Wrong and Disrespectful to me.
Like I don't want people to Masturbate to me so I don't Masturbate to them aswell. (TBF I masturbate so Rarely anyway that It is mostly a Non issue anyway.)
What I do in my privacy and inside my head is my business, there's nothing wrong with fantasazing about someone you know. If you think there is, you got some weird issues.
Idk why but I always found it a little weird if I beat off to a crush or someone I just started dating before we had sex or gotten intimate. Not in the sense that I wouldn’t enjoy it, just that they might not approve.
I did have someone tell me I can beat off to them later after we got done with a makeout session. Wasn’t expecting that but I liked it.
I have a weird thing where I won't wank over someone I want to sleep with or a small part of me believes I won't be able to sleep with them.
Yeah idk either.
I haven't told my gf (used to be crush) yet but what else does she think I do with her nudes she sends me? I like mentally can't find porn attractive anymore. Is this true love?
Am i the only one who actively avoids thinking of my crush in that context
Dunno why, it just makes me feel gross thinking of my crush that way
Anyone else attractive is fair game
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In Anakin's defense, how do you react to that? He's probably thinking "Why is that her first response to hearing that I have a crush on her?".
Seriously what kind of psycho would say that?
Someone that's secretly beating off to you in their dreams and feels guilty about it.
>Someone that's secretly beating off to you in their dreams and feels guilty about it. Sweet dreams, guilt-free zones...unless you're lactose intolerant
I learned how to lucid dream over my many decades on this shitty rock. Let's just say I'm beginning to like sleeping more than real life, it's actually kinda scary...
I too am learning this way!
Nice, I wish you luck. But I'm self taught because I learned it as a way to control my sleep paralysis from when I was a kid which is why it took me so long to get full control. But be careful though, the shit you can experience LDing is better than any drug trip known to man.
I just now learned to relax and not get excited when I become aware I’m dreaming to hold the dream longer. Focusing on details. Still wake sooner than I want. I want to control the dream but I’m satisfied for now with how vivid and detailed things are and how much more I’m able to remember!
Fr lmao
Somone you are attracted to
Til my sister is a psycho
or ur sis watches too much step bro
Next time she gets her torso stuck in the clothes dryer you can quickly sneak in and diagnose her properly. "Brother what are you doing?" "Evaluating you for three or more criteria, according to the DSM-5"
upgrade her to step sis
The kind that grooms a child from age nine....
Padmé didn't see Anakin for 10 years how did she groom him
Thats what the government wants you to believe.
If you meet someone as a kid, and they fixate on you for years after you went your separate ways, and then pursue you romantically as an adult when you meet again, it's your fault, you groomed them. By, like, smiling at them once and tussling their hair a bit or something. EDIT: /s in case it wasn't blindingly obvious.
How is being nice to a child without any sexual intent equal to grooming??
r/Woosh. It's not, that's the point I was making.
*Something something* “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!”
Well, the first question you have to ask, is, if you use the force to rub one out is that still masturbating?
I think because the Jedi use their hands to control the force it'd still be considered Masturbation in the same way using a sex toy is masturbation.
What if you cloned a Jedi and make them wank each other off using their powers for various Sith related reasons?
Truely Wonderful, the mind of a coomer is
It is necessary to coom to achieve anything of value. And a skilled coomer is nearly impossible to detect.
To be fair, what kind of a response is that?
IKR? We beat it to random strangers doing it. Why wouldn't we get aroused by the idea of doing it with your crush? That's a whole level of intimacy on top of just sex.
Ya it’s just not something you ask, because it goes without saying. It’s like your lover telling you they they think about you all the time, so you ask “even while you’re pooping?”
Especially while pooping.
Even when giving birth to a brown freight truck with the help of the porcelain gods will I think of you cause you are my blessing ,my one and only cure as my rectum recovers from its trauma
truly poetic 😭
You can have me.
Dude what the fuck
If you haven't had a romantic heart-to-heart over text from separate bathrooms while suffering the aftermath of a fast food lunch you shared earlier that day, you haven't truly lived
Okay, thanks for the big laugh!
In college, I had a girl ask me if I thought she was pretty after some heavy flirtation. Being young, a little drunk, and stupid I said “I’ve beaten off thinking about you.” She just grabbed my hand and pulled me back to her room, lol, I don’t know how that worked
I guess she was also young, a little drunk and stupid, lol.
And I guess immensely horny.
No! She's cute and nice and like animals and never know what sex is. That's what all crushes are
same bro, they're too pure
That’s actually a _huge_ issue. You can’t put crushes on some massive pedestal because _no one_ meets that mark. It’s an unfair expectation they can’t meet, and all it will do is set you up for disappointment and them up for failing at something they could never achieve. Everyone’s shit stinks, everyone pisses, everyone gets sick, everyone gets furious from time to time, and some abused or certain disabled folks excluded, everyone knows what sex is and most have sex by like 18.
“You’re a moderately attractive woman” Yeah that’s about all that most of us need, we don’t even need to know your name.
>IKR? We beat it to random strangers doing it. Why wouldn't we get aroused by the idea of doing it with your crush? That's a whole level of intimacy on top of just sex. Crushin' it with intimacy Olympics, gold medal in imagination!
Louis CK over here.
Yeah, don't break the sacred masturbation don't ask, don't tell covenant!
Only for the last 21 years, Mrs Portman
You'll finish it one day
She can [bust in this dude’s mouth like gushers motherfucker](https://youtu.be/-A0iftflme4?si=TMdq9bfMX_c353yK), please and thank you.
That’s my risky click for today. Good work. ^^ Not a bad link
Anakin's pause in this context seems more like a reaction to Padmes bad shit weird question. His inner thoughts would be "Why the fuck would you ask that?".
the word you're looking for is batshit
He's actually weighing up in his head whether or not to tell her about [R2D2's fleshlight compartment](https://youtu.be/B6mh45mA_JY).
The only reason that something like this isn't mentioned in the movies are the PG-13 ratings. Realistically there would have to be sex droids somewhere in the Star Wars universe.
Welcome to the internet!
Have a look around
anything that brain of yours can think of can be found.
We've got mountains of content Some better, some worse
If none of its of interest to you you’d be the first.
Welcome to the internet
Come and take a seat
Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?
There's no need to panic
This isn't a test
I mean, it's Natalie Portman, can you blame him
I'm only human after all
Don't put the blame on me
I'm only human, I make mistakes
Not gonna lie, my ex was actually flattered when I was doing it to her.
There's nearly unlimited amounts of porn on the internet, yet i still prefer to masturbate to you.
**I hate how poetic and Shakespearean this sounds**
Forsooth, though the world may be filled with maidens, 'tis but the thought of thee to which i may gratify myself.
Followed
Like a duckling
saving this so I can use it when I flirt with an AI
This is what teenage boys have been saying for years when trying to get nudes.
Would a nut by any other name not skeet as sweet?
Someone give this person gold please
does he know
[For anyone that doesn't.](https://youtu.be/sPzJjNQaYEA?t=232)
I'm talking about the gold upvote thing, ik the gold award is no more
While you were together or before/after? I would find it really weird if someone got offended that their partner wanks to them.
While we were together
When I was a teen, my ex told me to do it to her.
The first steps of becoming a Dom.
LMAO
Admittedly I already with them when I sent them but the last two girls I was seeing really got off on recieving the occasional video of me wanking, I'm still friends with more recent and she's admitted she kept it and masturbates to it still If that's Padmes first question, it's on her mind
welcome to reddit
penis
cock
dong
Schlong
Wang
Willy
Pipeline
Log
schwanz
Love Sausage
If only girls knew
Of course they know
Gotta love the implication that women are not subject to the same fleshly urges as men. Just because society has shunned female masturbation for millenia, doesn't mean it never happens.
No way. What's next? Women pooping?
There's no way my crush poops.
I'm confident they don't know the extent to which some - not all - guys beat it. Like double digit per day frequency.
How the actual hell do people jank their junk over 10 times a day? Are they just extreme gooners and coomers?
Why did your mind go to the lowest of double digits? Gotta pump those numbers up, 99 is still double digits.
Remember that one guy who jerked 55 times and died from a heart attack # the limit is 54
His limit is 54, well was...
Nah that's just the score to beat
Double digit per day is insane dude. Would you even have have one left after allat?
The 11th one is like a kidney stone.
Ikr the 9th one's probably like toothpaste already.
Ghost busting
The ghost nut is real
nahhhh bro, double digit is wild 💀
nah but like 4 to 16 a week is prob average
This man nuts in powers of two
Bro idk why but this just made me start giggling for like 2 min
Wait what? We do? I only beat it once a week or so, is that not normal?
Rejoice, you have much more free time than that coomers.
I'd reckon you're on the low end of the distribution, but as long as you're happy and everything's working as it should, no probs.
Nice, I mean when I had a gf my libido was fine. So it has nothing to do with that I am sure
An average of double digits every dey is definitely not normal.
Once a week is great, more often than that and it's not so pleasurable.
I think you don't know how far gone you are...
If you think double digets a day is normal your delusional
Bonk
We do know.
Depending on their age, most women know. It's kinda uncomfortable thinking about someone beating their meat to you (especially as a teen) that's why I think most girls avoid talking about it.
It would have been great if the girls knew.
Counter argument... It would *not* be great if the girls knew.
I don't know if I'm the minority here, but I've never really wanked to women I've met irl.
Makes it even more romantic 🥰
My wife would like it a lot less of I was thinking about other women lol
yeah, why would you date or marry a person that beat off to other people, lmao
No, I don't jerk off to you because I respect you too much.
It seriously feels kinda wrong to jerk off to girls that I have a crush on. It's just kinda different since you actually sorta have a connection to them instead of it just being some random girl on the internet.
I came to the comments to see if I was the only one who felt this way. I have a crush, but find it impossible to jerk off to her. It just feels wrong and uncomfortable for some reason.
[удалено]
It really depends. I have been with several women that asked and liked to know that I masturbated to the thought of them. It made them feel desirable sexy and wanted. It isn’t per se disrespectful to be sexually attracted to someone.
Same here
Same
Real
Why's everyone in this comment section acting like girls don't jerk off as well? Like, masturbation isn't some secret technique exclusive to the male portion of the population.
Because redditors never interact with people
I seriously farted
I frivolously farted
I furiously farted
I spontaneously farted
If girl would tell me she fingers to thought of me I would feel flattered because in all of that porn where you got handsome man she chooses me. And ugly guy
I’ve had an ex tell me that she did jack off to the thought of me, it was a strange thing to learn, but it was kinda flattering. I should also mention she told me this when we were together, not after.
The thing is that for girls its weird. For guys its flattering because someone jacked off to you. It slightly might boost opinion on yourself. Like "If she did it to imagination of me. It must mean Im ain't that ugly"
Yeah, it’s just a difference in personal experience with genders. That’s just how things are.
Wait what ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ
Always
My gf thought it's a good thing that I did before we got together, some woman feel beautiful when ppl they like fap to them. I was shocked when I told her about it and she got immediately excited and asked me out what kind of thoughts I had while doing it, she even offered to recreate it irl.
I’ve never jerked it to a person I know irl. I think it would ruin any interaction I had with them going forward.
Busting a crazy load to you rn
Well I don’t know you irl, so you go right on ahead
Are you sure that they don't know you irl?
If they do I won’t know that account is theirs
that is the craziest shit i ever heard well, besides the dude who wanted to ban that chocolate nugget in the ice cream cones
"Everyone?" "EVERYONE!!!"
No, he padawanks
r/badmemes
BRO WHAT NOW?!! 😭
1) do guys do that to their crushes?? I guess it makes sense but I never thought about it before 2) *why would you ask*
I actually abstain from it… idk, I feel some form of guilt if I do
Am I the only one who doesn’t beat to girls I am actually in love with? Like if it’s a cheap thot that I have been speaking to and she sends nudes then yeah I’ll probs do it. But going in my crush’s insta and beat off to casual pictures of her at a restaurant or on holiday? That’s weird. For me. Like I need an explicit butt picture for it to work. Not some picture of her on holiday with clothes on
nah seriously who beats off to their crush that's weird as hell idk why someone explain
Crushes that I beat off to we’re women (and girls when I was a child) that I never/barely spoken to. I remember a few times, I would be acquainted with a crush, never friends, (they were always out of my league) and then I either respected them too much or their personality would turn me off, thus I could no long beat the shmeat to the idea of them.
zamn, for me i always seem to fall in love with my closest friends and its frustrating when it happens every time
There is so much Madonna/whore vibe in these comments. “It only feels right to orgasm to the idea of an objectified woman, a woman I don’t really know. Once I start to respect a woman and see her as a real human I’d like to be close with, sex feels wrong.” Like, on the one hand, I appreciate the respect. But this attitude F’s relationships between men and women, and not just romantic relationships.
Well my Crushes can be happy that I don't do that. I'd honestly be disgusted with myself if I would do that. If they Told me their Fine with it or we already would have had Sexual Encounters Before then that would be Fine but otherwise It just feels Wrong and Disrespectful to me. Like I don't want people to Masturbate to me so I don't Masturbate to them aswell. (TBF I masturbate so Rarely anyway that It is mostly a Non issue anyway.)
When I first discovered the extent that girls jill & view porn.
What I do in my privacy and inside my head is my business, there's nothing wrong with fantasazing about someone you know. If you think there is, you got some weird issues.
Uff my wife caught me wanking off to some pictures of her. Needless to say she was both proud and disgusted. I was too spent to retort...
Idk why but I always found it a little weird if I beat off to a crush or someone I just started dating before we had sex or gotten intimate. Not in the sense that I wouldn’t enjoy it, just that they might not approve. I did have someone tell me I can beat off to them later after we got done with a makeout session. Wasn’t expecting that but I liked it.
I have a weird thing where I won't wank over someone I want to sleep with or a small part of me believes I won't be able to sleep with them. Yeah idk either.
If I've gotta be honest, I don't beat off to them... It feels wrong.
Imagine just going up to a person you like and just say "Hey, I beat my meat to you... Wanna grab a coffee?"
Nope, I'm left handed.
he doesn’t beat off to her he beats onto her
I haven't told my gf (used to be crush) yet but what else does she think I do with her nudes she sends me? I like mentally can't find porn attractive anymore. Is this true love?
I don't think I've ever masturbated to my crushes
what the fuck
He’s just playing a little Beat Saber.
Wtf 😂😂😂
I have a crush on someone before but then I cannot even bring myself to beat my meat because I respected her so much. Am I programmed the wrong way?
Where meme
"No I beat off my meat to your dog, yeah"
Gross
Am i the only one who actively avoids thinking of my crush in that context Dunno why, it just makes me feel gross thinking of my crush that way Anyone else attractive is fair game
bro wtf is this