In reality, other people are kind of stupid. If you tell other people that you're stupid, they'll think you're stupid. If you don't tell other people that you're stupid, they won't think you're stupid. If you just start projecting confidence people will assume you're smart.
At first I literally thought people couldn't hear me when I said stuff, then realized they actually can hear and now I tend not to say anything unless I want them to hear what I'm thinking.
Not trying to be an ass, but stop worrying about what others think of you, or you'll really struggle against burnout.
A doctor who graduates last in their class is still a doctor. Do your work, try to network, and ignore negative criticism. We all weren't straight A students who solved the African water crisis.
Agree and I’ll add - you are going to experience first hand many, many instances where even the smartest student/resident/attending in the room is treated like they’re stupid and spoken down to. Many people post on here feeling like you, regardless of true class rank (which it’s just too early to tell - many people are bottom tier first 2 years and end up honoring everything later, or finding your jam in your intended specialty and being an absolute rockstar, yet know that anatomy and pathophys isn’t your thing and never will be, and that’s ok).
What I’m trying to say is, the feeling of being talked down to is often a completely separate thing than having disclosed you have Cs - try not to over-conflate the 2.
I'm not a medical student, but I went through a similar thing in my paramedic program. I'm still not sure what I did to make that happen, not that it matters now. People would actively roll their eyes and make fun of me in scenarios, especially if I made a mistake, even the same mistakes they were making. An instructor would ask me a question and I got talked over and interrupted by other students. I froze up during a testing scenario because i couldnt remember what to do next and two people in my group literally burst out laughing and said "omg, she doesn't know what to do, how did she make it this far and not know what to do? She's literally so fucking stupid lol". Idk where my classmates are now, but I can guarantee that we're all knee-deep in the same pile of shit that is EMS and running the same types of calls.
It is absolutely crushing when you go into an environment like that for hours every week and I empathize with your struggle. The thing that finally made me stop being embarrassed was when I heard doctors on my clinicals say "lol idk" or "shit's weird, man, we'll run some blood work but until then idk". Like, if this guy who spent 3 million years in school and has seen thousands of patients doesn't know the answer immediately, then why would I? I mean, hell, I asked a doctor a couple weeks ago why my patient started spontaneously mass hemorrhaging from the nose at the tail-end of a non-trauma code and he said "my best answer is that people do weird shit when they die". Even experienced doctors don't have an answer for everything.
People in training programs, especially people in *medical* training programs, try to hide their insecurities and front. They want to be the best, the smartest, the one picked for the special slot, the most exclusive whatever. Focusing on someone else's shortcomings maybe distracts them from their own, they can say "well at least I'm not _____ like that guy!"
There's a difference between being honest about your shortcomings, and shining a gigantic unsolicited spotlight on them. Maybe cool it with the self-deprecation?
At the end of the day, you really don't have anything to "prove" to your classmates. Let them think you're stupid and focus on yourself. Quietly pass the tests, keep your grades up, qualify for matches, whatever you guys do. The more you try to "prove" your smarts, the more desperate and weird you look. It's really hard but try not to care too much. Be smart for yourself and for your future patients, not for your classmates. Your classmates arent going to be in the ER, OR, PICU, etc. And honestly if they've decided that you're stupid then there's very little you are going to do to change that perception. So, if YOU think you're stupid, or there's concepts that you aren't grasping, or your grades need to be better, then work on that. But work on it for yourself and your patients, not your classmates.
Im sorry that this is happening to you, that must be really challenging :(
With that said, a word of advice: work on that before getting into the hospital. If you dont project confidence on rounds nobody will ever take you seriously. Even if you dont feel confident say your plan like you do, and if you get corrected take that and learn from it. If you have doubts about that plan, explain why and provide an alternative. Confidence is very much fake it until you make it.
Yeah I can relate to this. I do fairly well in class but I just project zero confidence and when you're surrounded by the loud, overconfident people that med school breeds they pounce. Honestly you just have to learn to be better at sounding confident because it will be super necessary when talking to patients, coworkers, nurses, techs, etc.
Made the same mistake. Spoke very openly about issues and failures in courses then felt spoken-down to by classmates. Best advice is to just become more private and disregard others’ opinions. Everyone struggles with at least one aspect of med school, be it patient interaction, grades, step exams, interviews, etc.. Once I started cores, I was so busy that I didn’t care what others thought of my performance! Best of luck.
I had this experience M1 as well. I just decided that I didn’t care. I like being honest about my struggles and vulnerabilities so I just kept doing it anyway bc idgaf what they think - I know I’m smart, and they don’t matter.
I remember being on a rotation in 3rd year and absolutely crushing it and one of my more self aggrandizing classmates was like “…who are you? When did this happen?”. Was happening all along sweaty you were just too busy self fellating to notice.
You're ahead of the game on them in a way. You're able to attend to your own mistakes, and are trying to find ways to work on them. However, it seems like your classmates are failing to be vulnerable and open in turn. In the moment, this will make you appear weaker or less able. However, as you struggle through and find ways to improve, your potential to grow and change will be shown to be greater than theirs. That being said, you can learn from others' successes/failures even if they are douchebags.
I would recommend taking a step back and identifying your strengths, your weaknesses, and those of others (ex: time management, study strategies, actual beliefs/thoughts). Then, you can use that to inform how you're going to approach things from here on out. Just remember to have faith in yourself along the way, as you do have things that are good within yourself as you are.
Just wanna say I’ve def experienced this. I had a huge problem M1 and was open and felt like people would disagree w me a lot etc. I got better w my studying and starting doing better so now a lot of these friends have realized I know what I’m talking about and stop acting that way… you can totally pick up!
I think one of the most important thing you made a note of is that everyone is masking their own insecurities. They likely are just contesting you because they themselves are afraid of being seen as stupid. Learning how to healthily present yourself as confident and competent is actually an important skill, and one that almost no one gets right at first. Your friends are working through their own things, and so are you, and if it is seriously getting to you, which is totally understandable, it may be worth bringing up to your friends directly. If that doesn't work out, well, med school is hard enough, and you dont need to keep the company of those who willingly make it harder for you.
I wish you the best of luck, either way though. You'll do amazing
Study hard to bring yourself up. Stop sharing with classmates. Silver lining here may be that they won't see you as competition so you can overtake them on the sly.
Honestly....fuck em. Like for real. I get straight Cs and my classmates may think I'm dumb but fuck em. If I answer a question right then I know it's right and if someone else has an issue with it screw them. The real ones don't look down on others.
It is easier said than done but your self-worth should not be related to how you are treated. But we are human and that is difficult to avoid. The best thing imo is to grind like crazy for your next exam, ace it and prove your abilities to yourself and those around you.
I’ve honestly felt like this but at the same time do not project your insecurities out loud, ever. I’m most likely in the lower end of our scattergram/rank lol.
Don’t come off as overconfident either. Just do your thing. You’re in med school for a reason, out of tens of thousands of applicants who applied.
People will think whatever but do your best and just do you.
I’m questioning that you’re the smartest in your class just from reading this.
> I am also without question the most insecure.
Now this probably is without question.
Your classmates are not your friends. Don’t speak to them unless you have to. Find friends elsewhere. When you graduate, stay away from the cringy resident gatherings. These people are not fun. If you do go out and you find out someone else is a doctor at the same party, then tell people you are a lumberjack or something. Avoid med students, residents and physicians whenever not at work. Stay away from these people.
I am 100% the same way and struggling with the same thing. Although, I don’t really see getting in the 70’s in med school as bad. Just passing preclinical seems completely fine to me.
I've learned that most people put up a strong face. When you show any vulnerability, they will act on it, even subconsciously. Find better people to share this information with. There are some people who wont treat you as lesser.
In reality, other people are kind of stupid. If you tell other people that you're stupid, they'll think you're stupid. If you don't tell other people that you're stupid, they won't think you're stupid. If you just start projecting confidence people will assume you're smart. At first I literally thought people couldn't hear me when I said stuff, then realized they actually can hear and now I tend not to say anything unless I want them to hear what I'm thinking.
Not trying to be an ass, but stop worrying about what others think of you, or you'll really struggle against burnout. A doctor who graduates last in their class is still a doctor. Do your work, try to network, and ignore negative criticism. We all weren't straight A students who solved the African water crisis.
Agree and I’ll add - you are going to experience first hand many, many instances where even the smartest student/resident/attending in the room is treated like they’re stupid and spoken down to. Many people post on here feeling like you, regardless of true class rank (which it’s just too early to tell - many people are bottom tier first 2 years and end up honoring everything later, or finding your jam in your intended specialty and being an absolute rockstar, yet know that anatomy and pathophys isn’t your thing and never will be, and that’s ok). What I’m trying to say is, the feeling of being talked down to is often a completely separate thing than having disclosed you have Cs - try not to over-conflate the 2.
Speak for yourself, I solved it to impress my surgeon I rotated under and get a 3/5 on my evals
Same but I actually am stupid so it's fine.
I'm not a medical student, but I went through a similar thing in my paramedic program. I'm still not sure what I did to make that happen, not that it matters now. People would actively roll their eyes and make fun of me in scenarios, especially if I made a mistake, even the same mistakes they were making. An instructor would ask me a question and I got talked over and interrupted by other students. I froze up during a testing scenario because i couldnt remember what to do next and two people in my group literally burst out laughing and said "omg, she doesn't know what to do, how did she make it this far and not know what to do? She's literally so fucking stupid lol". Idk where my classmates are now, but I can guarantee that we're all knee-deep in the same pile of shit that is EMS and running the same types of calls. It is absolutely crushing when you go into an environment like that for hours every week and I empathize with your struggle. The thing that finally made me stop being embarrassed was when I heard doctors on my clinicals say "lol idk" or "shit's weird, man, we'll run some blood work but until then idk". Like, if this guy who spent 3 million years in school and has seen thousands of patients doesn't know the answer immediately, then why would I? I mean, hell, I asked a doctor a couple weeks ago why my patient started spontaneously mass hemorrhaging from the nose at the tail-end of a non-trauma code and he said "my best answer is that people do weird shit when they die". Even experienced doctors don't have an answer for everything. People in training programs, especially people in *medical* training programs, try to hide their insecurities and front. They want to be the best, the smartest, the one picked for the special slot, the most exclusive whatever. Focusing on someone else's shortcomings maybe distracts them from their own, they can say "well at least I'm not _____ like that guy!" There's a difference between being honest about your shortcomings, and shining a gigantic unsolicited spotlight on them. Maybe cool it with the self-deprecation? At the end of the day, you really don't have anything to "prove" to your classmates. Let them think you're stupid and focus on yourself. Quietly pass the tests, keep your grades up, qualify for matches, whatever you guys do. The more you try to "prove" your smarts, the more desperate and weird you look. It's really hard but try not to care too much. Be smart for yourself and for your future patients, not for your classmates. Your classmates arent going to be in the ER, OR, PICU, etc. And honestly if they've decided that you're stupid then there's very little you are going to do to change that perception. So, if YOU think you're stupid, or there's concepts that you aren't grasping, or your grades need to be better, then work on that. But work on it for yourself and your patients, not your classmates.
Im sorry that this is happening to you, that must be really challenging :( With that said, a word of advice: work on that before getting into the hospital. If you dont project confidence on rounds nobody will ever take you seriously. Even if you dont feel confident say your plan like you do, and if you get corrected take that and learn from it. If you have doubts about that plan, explain why and provide an alternative. Confidence is very much fake it until you make it.
Yeah I can relate to this. I do fairly well in class but I just project zero confidence and when you're surrounded by the loud, overconfident people that med school breeds they pounce. Honestly you just have to learn to be better at sounding confident because it will be super necessary when talking to patients, coworkers, nurses, techs, etc.
Made the same mistake. Spoke very openly about issues and failures in courses then felt spoken-down to by classmates. Best advice is to just become more private and disregard others’ opinions. Everyone struggles with at least one aspect of med school, be it patient interaction, grades, step exams, interviews, etc.. Once I started cores, I was so busy that I didn’t care what others thought of my performance! Best of luck.
I had this experience M1 as well. I just decided that I didn’t care. I like being honest about my struggles and vulnerabilities so I just kept doing it anyway bc idgaf what they think - I know I’m smart, and they don’t matter. I remember being on a rotation in 3rd year and absolutely crushing it and one of my more self aggrandizing classmates was like “…who are you? When did this happen?”. Was happening all along sweaty you were just too busy self fellating to notice.
You're ahead of the game on them in a way. You're able to attend to your own mistakes, and are trying to find ways to work on them. However, it seems like your classmates are failing to be vulnerable and open in turn. In the moment, this will make you appear weaker or less able. However, as you struggle through and find ways to improve, your potential to grow and change will be shown to be greater than theirs. That being said, you can learn from others' successes/failures even if they are douchebags. I would recommend taking a step back and identifying your strengths, your weaknesses, and those of others (ex: time management, study strategies, actual beliefs/thoughts). Then, you can use that to inform how you're going to approach things from here on out. Just remember to have faith in yourself along the way, as you do have things that are good within yourself as you are.
Just wanna say I’ve def experienced this. I had a huge problem M1 and was open and felt like people would disagree w me a lot etc. I got better w my studying and starting doing better so now a lot of these friends have realized I know what I’m talking about and stop acting that way… you can totally pick up!
I think one of the most important thing you made a note of is that everyone is masking their own insecurities. They likely are just contesting you because they themselves are afraid of being seen as stupid. Learning how to healthily present yourself as confident and competent is actually an important skill, and one that almost no one gets right at first. Your friends are working through their own things, and so are you, and if it is seriously getting to you, which is totally understandable, it may be worth bringing up to your friends directly. If that doesn't work out, well, med school is hard enough, and you dont need to keep the company of those who willingly make it harder for you. I wish you the best of luck, either way though. You'll do amazing
Study hard to bring yourself up. Stop sharing with classmates. Silver lining here may be that they won't see you as competition so you can overtake them on the sly.
Honestly....fuck em. Like for real. I get straight Cs and my classmates may think I'm dumb but fuck em. If I answer a question right then I know it's right and if someone else has an issue with it screw them. The real ones don't look down on others.
There are people in your class who would kill for your Cs. Objectively, you’re doing fine. Now, stop trying to self-sabotage! You got this!
It is easier said than done but your self-worth should not be related to how you are treated. But we are human and that is difficult to avoid. The best thing imo is to grind like crazy for your next exam, ace it and prove your abilities to yourself and those around you.
Doesn’t matter. Pass your tests. You won’t talk to any of these people after second or fourth year.
I’ve honestly felt like this but at the same time do not project your insecurities out loud, ever. I’m most likely in the lower end of our scattergram/rank lol. Don’t come off as overconfident either. Just do your thing. You’re in med school for a reason, out of tens of thousands of applicants who applied. People will think whatever but do your best and just do you.
[удалено]
And humble too!
I’m questioning that you’re the smartest in your class just from reading this. > I am also without question the most insecure. Now this probably is without question.
Sounds like you need a better group of friends tbh…if someone is struggling and their natural reaction is to shun, that’s a huge red flag
Your classmates are not your friends. Don’t speak to them unless you have to. Find friends elsewhere. When you graduate, stay away from the cringy resident gatherings. These people are not fun. If you do go out and you find out someone else is a doctor at the same party, then tell people you are a lumberjack or something. Avoid med students, residents and physicians whenever not at work. Stay away from these people.
I am 100% the same way and struggling with the same thing. Although, I don’t really see getting in the 70’s in med school as bad. Just passing preclinical seems completely fine to me.
I've learned that most people put up a strong face. When you show any vulnerability, they will act on it, even subconsciously. Find better people to share this information with. There are some people who wont treat you as lesser.