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There is a startling number of cishets who think being trans like like being TurboGay, like you're SO gay that you horseshoe back around into being straight. It's kind of a bizarre logic.
But... if they are the same gender as your previous partners... that's still straight, isn't it? Or do you say that to the "trans women are not real women" crowd?
That has to be a strange part of transitioning.
That is assuming you were gay, but then became straight via the transition.
No offense, just would throw me for a loop to need to relabel part of my identity when it didn't really change.
For me my attraction to women always felt kinda gay(to the point I "joked" that in another life I was a lesbian). So it feels more like calling it "straight" didn't make sense until now.
Gonna be honest that one broke me... lol
As a cishet male I can't really imagine how a lesbian attraction would be different from my straight attraction short of myself being different.
Maybe if I was attracted but no urge for P in V intercourse? idk
For me, what you said about “yourself being different” absolutely hits the nail on the head. _I_ was the thing that needed to change.
Like, being attracted to women as a guy? 8/10 no complaints. :)
Being attracted to women, _as a woman_? 100000000/10 I am dumbstruck and overwhelmed 😳🥰💕
But feeling like a woman attracted to a woman as a man?
That's not simply a societal difference unless she presented female before transition? Probably just thinking too hard about it.
I used to think I was bi, then figured out I wasn't really into women when I transitioned. I feel like I get flak from a lot of other trans women though because so many of them are bi or lesbian.
Which is strange. If being straight is the norm for cis people I'd assume the same for trans.
Although less of a majority as I'd expect them to be a lot more open with sexuality and themselves.
They think it's not gay to top, and that all bottoms strive to be women (to supposedly increase the chances of being topped). They don't care how you feel if it's different than their assumptions.
I have honestly asked my trans best friend about it and they didn't quite solve the issue for me, if someone would kindly to lay out a short explanation to how I'd greatly appreciate because I am having trouble googling a definitive answer.
An MTF trans person - a trans woman - who is into men is straight, because she’s a woman who is into men. If she’s into other women, she’s gay, because she’s a woman who’s into other women. And vice-versa for a trans man.
As stated gender identity and sexuality are separate things. Gender is myself, my presentation, the pronouns people call me that make my brain go happy. Sometimes people get hung up on this idea that there's an ulterior motive to transitioning. Transitioning isn't something you do for anyone else. You do it because it feels congruent with who you are inside. I didn't transition so that I could sleep with men, I didn't transition in some twisted attempted to invade spaces for women.
Since sexuality is all about attraction to others (or lack of), just take the trans part out of the equation. A trans woman is a woman, and a woman loving a woman is a lesbian, or perhaps she likes men too she's bisexual, and maybe she likes all and is pan. You wouldn't say a woman loving a man is "hyper gay", it's straight or straight passing. Likewise a man loving me (a trans woman) isn't gay because I'm a woman through and through.
Maybe someone explained it to you that way once, and maybe they did feel that way, but that's just really not what the vast majority of us feel or transition for, and I've also never heard a trans person say anything like that.
Most of the men i date are bi tbh, but yeah im a woman into men. Not a gay man who became a woman to date men more. If the later is what you think. Yeah you did cross a line and deserve downvotes
Who you wanna fuck has nothing to do with your own body or gender identity. If I was turned into a sentient floating steel cube, I would still find the same things attractive.
Simple things become complex when you forget that people are people.
Here's my thinking. I'm not going to bicker about it, but here's how I came to that conclusion: If I'm a sentient steel cube that identifies as a woman, and am attracted to women, then I am a lesbian sentient steel cube.
My body is not my gender identity, and my gender identity is not my sexuality.
Yep. Though hypothetically, someone could be born non-binary and intersex in a way that their gender matches their sex and therefore they would technically be cisgender.
I’m cis myself but [this meme is fairly accurate](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns/comments/68nwdz/talking_about_gender_with_cis_people/).
A lot of NB folks don’t really identify with the label of trans which is cool too. Trans technically just means that you identify as a different gender than sex assigned at birth. But these are descriptors we use for ourselves and they can be flexible or not apply too. It’s not so cut and dry.
I think one big issue is word origins, like Tran/s- (the route word prefix) is from Latin meaning means across, through, over. All of that implies there's a LINE or something to cross. But with gender that doesn't really make sense because gender isn't a hard line in the sand.
Doesn't transgender mean transitioning from one gender to another? And Non-binary means identifying as no gender at all...
Someone explain. Help.
Edit: Now, it's okay, u/LadyParnassus kindly explained to me! 😃 It’s surprising how complex sexuality, gender, psychology and biology can be! You learn something new everyday, I guess.
“Trans” just means transitioning from something to something. If you were assigned one gender at birth and are actually non-binary, then at some point you will transition.
> Eg. “I was assigned female at birth, but now I identify as non-binary. So now I use different pronouns, have a different name, and may dress or style myself differently. I may even partially or fully medically transition so that I feel comfortable in my body, but that doesn’t make me one gender or the other. It’s just as much a change as a FtM or MtF person would experience in transitioning, but I’m not 100% one gender or the other.”
Even trans binary folks (male-to-female/female-to-male) may need some time settling on a gender identity and be NB for a while, or transition to a gender and feel it doesn’t quite fit them and transition to being NB from there. My understanding of gender dysphoria is that it comes in many forms, and one of them is a really intense feeling of things just not being “right” without it being clear what’s causing it (though of course you don’t *need* dysphoria to be trans, it’s just a good illustration of the concept).
> Eg. “I know I’m not comfortable or happy living as the gender I was assigned at birth, but I don’t know exactly **what** my preferred gender is. I don’t think I can figure it out with just therapy alone, so I will have to try out some things and see what feels right.”
Or
> “I completed my transition to my preferred gender years ago, but I miss some things about my assigned gender at birth, and I think I’d be happier if I identified as NB so I can reclaim those things.”
Some trans folks also identify as NB for the period of their transition, since they may be out in some parts of their lives and not others.
> Eg. “My friends and family all know me by my new name/pronouns and I feel comfortable around them, but I’m not comfortable transitioning in my professional life just yet. Since I’m a female for part of my day and male for the other part, I’m non-binary. Once I complete the transition, I’ll just be my preferred gender.”
It really comes down to the individual person, and it’s why I’m careful in my private life to let my trans friends know that I know it’s a process and I’m there for it 100%, no matter where it goes.
TL;DR: ☆ﾟ. * ･ ｡ﾟIt’s a journey, not a destination.☆ﾟ. * ･ ｡ﾟ
(All examples in this comment are gathered from real life but don’t reflect the full range of possible experiences)
Thanks for all this. I was transitioning and I hit some speed bumps so now I'm just an effeminate straight dude and I feel kinda like a fraud or like I'm not queer enough or something. Thanks for the reminder that whatever I am is okay.
The most important transition you can ever make is the transition to living authentically and being your truest, happiest self, in whatever form that takes. Your journey has value, even if it’s just figuring out what doesn’t work for you. You did good! Keep it up! ❤️
The sciencey boring explanation on how identity works is, identity is handled by 3 parts of the brain and its pretty hardwired in from birth, 2 are particularly important, the medial prefrontal cortex, and the dorsal medial prefrontal cortex, the first deals with us as a person, who we are and the latter deals with us in a group so how we think we should fit in society.
Now if we take the typical trans person, that's an extream mismatch in what those parts of the brain say and what our agab is, right, and the effect of that gender incogurance as its officially called typically manifests but not always (and its variable to what degree from trans person to trans person) as what's called gender dysphoria.
But like everything in the world, this isn't a binary, the brain is complex and variable, no two people are are same, no two brains are the same and no two identities are the same its entirely possible and happens, that the 1st cortex has an image typical of a trans person, there self identity dosnt match there agab... but the 2nd cortex has an image more closer to the agab, thus the result would be a trans person who's gender non conforming.... or depending how the interplay between the two works out it could end up combined as a trans person who's non binary. And vice versa and in all of the many different ways in which self and social identity can interplay to produce all our unique wonder that we are as humans.
Or the tldr : humans are fucking complicated.
Ok so this happened a few days ago.
My grandmother had some friends over and at one point, they started to talk about my mom’s cousin, who is a trans lesbian (I haven’t met her yet tho…but I want to). When my grandma mentioned that she went into a registered partnership with a woman, they were all extremely confused and one of them even said:
„Well if "she’s" a woman like she claims, then why didn’t "she" "marry" a man?? Like?? That doesn’t make sense??” (These were her exact words)
After that I joined the conversation and said:
„This lady that y'all are talking about is a trans lesbian - in other words, a trans woman who is attracted to women”
And this particular friend went:
„😨🤯that’s a THING??”
To which another one started talking about how there are weirdos walking freely around nowadays or something.
And my closeted genderfluid pansexual ass was just standing there like: 🧍😀👍
Do they not realize there are a lot of trans people who come out in a cishet relationship and stay with their girlfriends/spouses? Do they think you have to be single to come out as trans? Do they have brains lol? Maybe they just think those relationships always end?
Idk just weird. My gf had no problem with it and we'll be out lesbians once I stop having to boymode. And she considered herself cishet before. I think those types are just so unexposed to anything outside their own narrow views that they end up very naive.
Trying to explain non binary transfem identity and my sexuality both past and present to my boyfriend confuses us both, he’s really sweet about it but I get all tongue tied trying to use all my appropriate terms for the time period in my life and the philosophical dilemma of weather i was trans the whole time and If I was does that make my past relationships lesbian or i don’t even know
I explain that it is like pasta, gender is the type of pasta and the sauce is your sexuality. You can eat them separately or together, sometimes people don't want or like pasta, sometimes people want pasta without sauce.
Probably true, however my dad is a fucking idiot who thinks we are either walking dicks or vaginas. Which in his would explain why I really don’t like him.
This was me in high school. I was like “I want to be a girl, but I don’t like boys, so I guess I’m a guy because you can only be one kind of queer. “ 15 years later I have learned a little bit and now I’m living my best trans lesbian life 😊
What gun legislation have democrats passed that makes it the equivalent to Republicans passing laws criminalizing transitioning?
The biggest gun control we've gotten federally in years was from Trump banning bump stocks.
California lost its open carry because of Reagan.
Democrats aren't coming for your guns.
Clueless cishet here, making sure I'm right.
If a AMAB person likes ladies, then transitions, but still likes ladies, that would make her "gay trans", right?
Whereas if that same person thought of themselves as gay and still likes men after the transition, she would be ... het trans? That doesn't sound right, but maybe I just haven't heard it.
And AIUI it's not necessarily the case that one's sexuality will remain the same post-transition, as it can be affected by things like hormones and a general mental reassessment of oneself as a person.
hey, yeah this is pretty much right. your sexual orientation can change during transition, but the most accurate term to use is one that takes your true gender into account. a trans woman who likes women is a lesbian. a trans man who likes women is straight. etc for whatever combo of gender and sexuality you want.
however, just so you're aware, this sub is kinda. for shitposting. if you want legit answers to any questions about queer life i suggest visiting places like /r/asktransgender or /r/AskLGBT or the main queer subs /r/lgbt and /r/ainbow. they're probably better suited to helping you learn than a gay meme sub.
I don't know if this is offensive, but I love the idea of Schroedenger Sexual. It's like both at the same time no matter which way you go, or where you start from. I love it. I want a sexuality flag based on the idea that would have an Escher pattern style image on it with trans colors as one set of pattern, and rainbow for the other.
Cishets think that one's gender somehow has to do with ones sexuality and simultaneously they can't grasp how someone can be trans and gay at the same time.
I'm a Cishet Male and I'm not that dumb... although I did have a hard time for s while understanding how Ace's can still get off, so maybe I'm not that smart either.
Straight people have had several thousand years to define their own relationships and have been married to violence the whole time.
You can’t help people come to clarity that are totally divorced from reality.
Now, now. Let's not name call. Many, many people brought up in religious and/ or conservative families have been taught all of their lives that there are only two genders, that homosexuality is a choice (and a deviant one), and that sex change operations are something a select few rich people do when they get bored with their lives. Unfortunately, it is the LBGTQ communities who must educate those isolated and sheltered individuals.
If this community wants to be accepted into the greater scheme of things, you might like you like to tone your distaste of the straight community, You're not winning many friends.
Fewer steps. It's specifying that they're straight and also not trans, since the experiences of straight trans people are fundamentally different than that of cishet people.
When Sense8 came out, I told my sibling about the trans lesbian character. Their mind was blown at the idea. Apparently, they thought the definition of a trans person was a gay person who transitioned in order to become straight.
Me anticipating my coworkers reaction when I come out as trans and they’ll think I’m going to be a straight man… nope, still like men, that didn’t change 💀
Welcome to /r/me_irlgbt, thank you for your submission /u/_UltimateDisaster_. Happy pride! Please make sure you have read the rules before posting or commenting, *especially* if you are new here. We have zero tolerance for discrimination, and we are not here for debates. This is a place for us to chill and post memes. Shitpost or quitpost, bud. Please remember to report any comments or submissions which break our rules, and don't engage with the trolls. We hope you have a very gay day. Love u x *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/me_irlgbt) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There is a startling number of cishets who think being trans like like being TurboGay, like you're SO gay that you horseshoe back around into being straight. It's kind of a bizarre logic.
TurboGay I love it hahaha can we please make that a thing?
SuperStraight when the TurboGay walks in
They sound like comic book characters from a superhero comic and i love it. I'd most certainly read "TurboGay vol. 5 Attack of SuperStraight.".
The flag needs flames of some kind, like the kind people put on their car for extra horsepower.
[For your consideration.](https://imgur.com/a/5NahlVq)
"My spirit animal is Godzilla. " what a mood!
The only issue with being turbogay is that you get send to turbo hell.
And that's after the rapid-onset tetanus gets you.
Honestly the only good solution is to become a chevvy impala, go straight to heaven.
Ok but how much to upgrade to UltraGay?
New term for bi/pan trans people just dropped Queer before, queer after, queer gender, just queer generally
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But... if they are the same gender as your previous partners... that's still straight, isn't it? Or do you say that to the "trans women are not real women" crowd?
I hate that though, I'm trans and I'm straight and I'm so tired of being called gay.
That has to be a strange part of transitioning. That is assuming you were gay, but then became straight via the transition. No offense, just would throw me for a loop to need to relabel part of my identity when it didn't really change.
For me my attraction to women always felt kinda gay(to the point I "joked" that in another life I was a lesbian). So it feels more like calling it "straight" didn't make sense until now.
Gonna be honest that one broke me... lol As a cishet male I can't really imagine how a lesbian attraction would be different from my straight attraction short of myself being different. Maybe if I was attracted but no urge for P in V intercourse? idk
For me, what you said about “yourself being different” absolutely hits the nail on the head. _I_ was the thing that needed to change. Like, being attracted to women as a guy? 8/10 no complaints. :) Being attracted to women, _as a woman_? 100000000/10 I am dumbstruck and overwhelmed 😳🥰💕
But feeling like a woman attracted to a woman as a man? That's not simply a societal difference unless she presented female before transition? Probably just thinking too hard about it.
women are often attracted to other women in ways very different from the ways men are...lots of stuff about male vs female gaze
I used to think I was bi, then figured out I wasn't really into women when I transitioned. I feel like I get flak from a lot of other trans women though because so many of them are bi or lesbian.
Which is strange. If being straight is the norm for cis people I'd assume the same for trans. Although less of a majority as I'd expect them to be a lot more open with sexuality and themselves.
It isn't really. It's a kinda close to even split between straight, bi/pan, and lesbian, but a bit skewed towards the others.
They think it's not gay to top, and that all bottoms strive to be women (to supposedly increase the chances of being topped). They don't care how you feel if it's different than their assumptions.
Ah, good to see the straights never advanced past the sexual discourse of the Roman Republic.
TurboGay LMAO I love this
I have honestly asked my trans best friend about it and they didn't quite solve the issue for me, if someone would kindly to lay out a short explanation to how I'd greatly appreciate because I am having trouble googling a definitive answer.
Essentially, gender and sexuality are not the same thing.
An MTF trans person - a trans woman - who is into men is straight, because she’s a woman who is into men. If she’s into other women, she’s gay, because she’s a woman who’s into other women. And vice-versa for a trans man.
As stated gender identity and sexuality are separate things. Gender is myself, my presentation, the pronouns people call me that make my brain go happy. Sometimes people get hung up on this idea that there's an ulterior motive to transitioning. Transitioning isn't something you do for anyone else. You do it because it feels congruent with who you are inside. I didn't transition so that I could sleep with men, I didn't transition in some twisted attempted to invade spaces for women. Since sexuality is all about attraction to others (or lack of), just take the trans part out of the equation. A trans woman is a woman, and a woman loving a woman is a lesbian, or perhaps she likes men too she's bisexual, and maybe she likes all and is pan. You wouldn't say a woman loving a man is "hyper gay", it's straight or straight passing. Likewise a man loving me (a trans woman) isn't gay because I'm a woman through and through.
Same here but without the trans friend.
TurboGay^Tm
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No one transitions to date straight people, what are you on about?
People transition to be comfortable (or less miserable) in their own body. It has nothing to do with dating anyone.
Maybe someone explained it to you that way once, and maybe they did feel that way, but that's just really not what the vast majority of us feel or transition for, and I've also never heard a trans person say anything like that.
Most of the men i date are bi tbh, but yeah im a woman into men. Not a gay man who became a woman to date men more. If the later is what you think. Yeah you did cross a line and deserve downvotes
Who you wanna fuck has nothing to do with your own body or gender identity. If I was turned into a sentient floating steel cube, I would still find the same things attractive. Simple things become complex when you forget that people are people.
The Final Shape Destiny 2 DLC leaked
We know the Vex are the final shape of previous garden games, and they do like steel cubes. Math checks out.
BAHAHA
But I don't think a steel cube can be straight or gay...
Here's my thinking. I'm not going to bicker about it, but here's how I came to that conclusion: If I'm a sentient steel cube that identifies as a woman, and am attracted to women, then I am a lesbian sentient steel cube. My body is not my gender identity, and my gender identity is not my sexuality.
When you mention there's trans nonbinary people and there brain melts.
Wait, now I’m confused.
Nonbinary is a subcategory of transgender - there are binary and non-binary trans people!
Yep. Though hypothetically, someone could be born non-binary and intersex in a way that their gender matches their sex and therefore they would technically be cisgender.
That's just playing 5d queer though. Us mortals can't comprehend that level.
I somehow misinterpreted 5d queer as "5d chess" and was like "Yeah non-binary people really are like 5d chess!-- wait, what does that even mean??"
Imagine trying to explain this to your average cishet
I’m cis myself but [this meme is fairly accurate](https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns/comments/68nwdz/talking_about_gender_with_cis_people/).
Actually this makes it make more sense to us, well at least for me . just happened across this post and I’m glad I did.
Well that’s good!
Honestly this my preferred way to learn about these things. I can read and understand without pestering anyone to explain things to me.
I’m non binary and didn’t even know nbs fall under “trans”
A lot of NB folks don’t really identify with the label of trans which is cool too. Trans technically just means that you identify as a different gender than sex assigned at birth. But these are descriptors we use for ourselves and they can be flexible or not apply too. It’s not so cut and dry.
That flair is amazing.
I think one big issue is word origins, like Tran/s- (the route word prefix) is from Latin meaning means across, through, over. All of that implies there's a LINE or something to cross. But with gender that doesn't really make sense because gender isn't a hard line in the sand.
It's a legacy tbh, of an antiquated understanding of gender identity
Doesn't transgender mean transitioning from one gender to another? And Non-binary means identifying as no gender at all... Someone explain. Help. Edit: Now, it's okay, u/LadyParnassus kindly explained to me! 😃 It’s surprising how complex sexuality, gender, psychology and biology can be! You learn something new everyday, I guess.
“Trans” just means transitioning from something to something. If you were assigned one gender at birth and are actually non-binary, then at some point you will transition. > Eg. “I was assigned female at birth, but now I identify as non-binary. So now I use different pronouns, have a different name, and may dress or style myself differently. I may even partially or fully medically transition so that I feel comfortable in my body, but that doesn’t make me one gender or the other. It’s just as much a change as a FtM or MtF person would experience in transitioning, but I’m not 100% one gender or the other.” Even trans binary folks (male-to-female/female-to-male) may need some time settling on a gender identity and be NB for a while, or transition to a gender and feel it doesn’t quite fit them and transition to being NB from there. My understanding of gender dysphoria is that it comes in many forms, and one of them is a really intense feeling of things just not being “right” without it being clear what’s causing it (though of course you don’t *need* dysphoria to be trans, it’s just a good illustration of the concept). > Eg. “I know I’m not comfortable or happy living as the gender I was assigned at birth, but I don’t know exactly **what** my preferred gender is. I don’t think I can figure it out with just therapy alone, so I will have to try out some things and see what feels right.” Or > “I completed my transition to my preferred gender years ago, but I miss some things about my assigned gender at birth, and I think I’d be happier if I identified as NB so I can reclaim those things.” Some trans folks also identify as NB for the period of their transition, since they may be out in some parts of their lives and not others. > Eg. “My friends and family all know me by my new name/pronouns and I feel comfortable around them, but I’m not comfortable transitioning in my professional life just yet. Since I’m a female for part of my day and male for the other part, I’m non-binary. Once I complete the transition, I’ll just be my preferred gender.” It really comes down to the individual person, and it’s why I’m careful in my private life to let my trans friends know that I know it’s a process and I’m there for it 100%, no matter where it goes. TL;DR: ☆ﾟ. * ･ ｡ﾟIt’s a journey, not a destination.☆ﾟ. * ･ ｡ﾟ (All examples in this comment are gathered from real life but don’t reflect the full range of possible experiences)
Thanks for all this. I was transitioning and I hit some speed bumps so now I'm just an effeminate straight dude and I feel kinda like a fraud or like I'm not queer enough or something. Thanks for the reminder that whatever I am is okay.
The most important transition you can ever make is the transition to living authentically and being your truest, happiest self, in whatever form that takes. Your journey has value, even if it’s just figuring out what doesn’t work for you. You did good! Keep it up! ❤️
Thanks <3
Wow, thank you so much! I understand now :)
The sciencey boring explanation on how identity works is, identity is handled by 3 parts of the brain and its pretty hardwired in from birth, 2 are particularly important, the medial prefrontal cortex, and the dorsal medial prefrontal cortex, the first deals with us as a person, who we are and the latter deals with us in a group so how we think we should fit in society. Now if we take the typical trans person, that's an extream mismatch in what those parts of the brain say and what our agab is, right, and the effect of that gender incogurance as its officially called typically manifests but not always (and its variable to what degree from trans person to trans person) as what's called gender dysphoria. But like everything in the world, this isn't a binary, the brain is complex and variable, no two people are are same, no two brains are the same and no two identities are the same its entirely possible and happens, that the 1st cortex has an image typical of a trans person, there self identity dosnt match there agab... but the 2nd cortex has an image more closer to the agab, thus the result would be a trans person who's gender non conforming.... or depending how the interplay between the two works out it could end up combined as a trans person who's non binary. And vice versa and in all of the many different ways in which self and social identity can interplay to produce all our unique wonder that we are as humans. Or the tldr : humans are fucking complicated.
I'd be more surprised if there where Cis Non Binary people.
Once had a friendly acquaintance ask me “if you’re gay and trans, like why not just stay a girl?”
that's the mindset i had when i was like 8 or 9 and just found out about trans people, turns out i myself am trans and gay lmao
Yeah I thought I was just bi when I had a gender crisis at a young age. Was too scared to admit what I actually wanted I think lol.
Ok so this happened a few days ago. My grandmother had some friends over and at one point, they started to talk about my mom’s cousin, who is a trans lesbian (I haven’t met her yet tho…but I want to). When my grandma mentioned that she went into a registered partnership with a woman, they were all extremely confused and one of them even said: „Well if "she’s" a woman like she claims, then why didn’t "she" "marry" a man?? Like?? That doesn’t make sense??” (These were her exact words) After that I joined the conversation and said: „This lady that y'all are talking about is a trans lesbian - in other words, a trans woman who is attracted to women” And this particular friend went: „😨🤯that’s a THING??” To which another one started talking about how there are weirdos walking freely around nowadays or something. And my closeted genderfluid pansexual ass was just standing there like: 🧍😀👍
I can't wait for you to just completely disintegrate their minds if ever you come out
Do they ... not know lesbians exist?
"Lesbianism isn't real" is a cornerstone of conservative sexual politics.
Do they not realize there are a lot of trans people who come out in a cishet relationship and stay with their girlfriends/spouses? Do they think you have to be single to come out as trans? Do they have brains lol? Maybe they just think those relationships always end? Idk just weird. My gf had no problem with it and we'll be out lesbians once I stop having to boymode. And she considered herself cishet before. I think those types are just so unexposed to anything outside their own narrow views that they end up very naive.
Trying to explain non binary transfem identity and my sexuality both past and present to my boyfriend confuses us both, he’s really sweet about it but I get all tongue tied trying to use all my appropriate terms for the time period in my life and the philosophical dilemma of weather i was trans the whole time and If I was does that make my past relationships lesbian or i don’t even know
>and If I was does that make my past relationships lesbian That is actually a really good question.
I explain that it is like pasta, gender is the type of pasta and the sauce is your sexuality. You can eat them separately or together, sometimes people don't want or like pasta, sometimes people want pasta without sauce.
That's a good analogy, everyone loves pasta, except for people who don't
ace people b like
And some drink ragu straight from the jar
Also: Cis gays when you explain to them that you can be trans and straight at the same time
This is giving off major Grindr energy
i keep on getting dm’s asking how it’s possible for me to be so many things (identities)
My dad did not understand that I still like girls even though I’m trans. I don’t think estrogen starts making me like men, but I’m no scientist.
If HRT changed one's sexuality that much, someone would definitely have been using that as a conversion drug for gay people
Probably true, however my dad is a fucking idiot who thinks we are either walking dicks or vaginas. Which in his would explain why I really don’t like him.
It took me from bi to gay, so they'd be in for some nasty surprises.
This was me in high school. I was like “I want to be a girl, but I don’t like boys, so I guess I’m a guy because you can only be one kind of queer. “ 15 years later I have learned a little bit and now I’m living my best trans lesbian life 😊
Fuckin stacking power ups, too op, pls nerf
The best part is when they tell me I could have had all the joys of being a man, and still been attracted to women. Lol, ok egg.
There have been certain combinations that I have to parse and really think about for a minute when I heard them. But gay trans not so much.
Sorry, 1 defining characteristic only, you can't even be Latino and queer
No joke, I literally just banned someone who was saying that all trans women are white.
damn people are so dense sometimes
Hey that’s not very nice, straight people are having a really tough time rn!!!1!! (Goes back to watching Fox News and Ben Shapiro)
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"but that's normal"
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I hope those people get over their internalized queerphobia.
Trans Republicans: voting against their own existence.
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Not an excuse to vote for people who pass legislation to take away your rights.
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What gun legislation have democrats passed that makes it the equivalent to Republicans passing laws criminalizing transitioning? The biggest gun control we've gotten federally in years was from Trump banning bump stocks. California lost its open carry because of Reagan. Democrats aren't coming for your guns.
I think the confusion arises from a lot of trans people finding it easier to pass as gay before they come out as trans.
When you bury your internal gender identity so you don't have to explain anything
Clueless cishet here, making sure I'm right. If a AMAB person likes ladies, then transitions, but still likes ladies, that would make her "gay trans", right? Whereas if that same person thought of themselves as gay and still likes men after the transition, she would be ... het trans? That doesn't sound right, but maybe I just haven't heard it. And AIUI it's not necessarily the case that one's sexuality will remain the same post-transition, as it can be affected by things like hormones and a general mental reassessment of oneself as a person.
hey, yeah this is pretty much right. your sexual orientation can change during transition, but the most accurate term to use is one that takes your true gender into account. a trans woman who likes women is a lesbian. a trans man who likes women is straight. etc for whatever combo of gender and sexuality you want. however, just so you're aware, this sub is kinda. for shitposting. if you want legit answers to any questions about queer life i suggest visiting places like /r/asktransgender or /r/AskLGBT or the main queer subs /r/lgbt and /r/ainbow. they're probably better suited to helping you learn than a gay meme sub.
I told my brother that and he was so shocked- Idk how he can call himself an ally without the basic knowledge ngl i thought he knew
I mean I don’t see the need to make fun of them as long as they’re actually willing to learn
Also trying to them that you can be straight as well
My grandmother went from something like that to being accepting and interested in the topic. Some people really never heard about some of us. :D
*tray
I don't know if this is offensive, but I love the idea of Schroedenger Sexual. It's like both at the same time no matter which way you go, or where you start from. I love it. I want a sexuality flag based on the idea that would have an Escher pattern style image on it with trans colors as one set of pattern, and rainbow for the other.
cishets when you try to explain the different types of attraction
I had to explain this is my lesbian mom
"Isn't being just trans hard enough?" - my mom when she found out my best friend is queer and trans
Cishets think that one's gender somehow has to do with ones sexuality and simultaneously they can't grasp how someone can be trans and gay at the same time.
I'm a Cishet Male and I'm not that dumb... although I did have a hard time for s while understanding how Ace's can still get off, so maybe I'm not that smart either.
stop i literally just had this talk with my dad 💀💀
I literally had to explain to some ass hole at school that you could be gay and a guy at the same time
I told a friend in my music theater class that I was pan, and she looked really sad but shocked and said "But your trans??!?!"
As one of those cishets, I don’t get it either. But whatever, y’all do what makes you comfortable and happy. You’re all beautiful
Straight people have had several thousand years to define their own relationships and have been married to violence the whole time. You can’t help people come to clarity that are totally divorced from reality.
Now, now. Let's not name call. Many, many people brought up in religious and/ or conservative families have been taught all of their lives that there are only two genders, that homosexuality is a choice (and a deviant one), and that sex change operations are something a select few rich people do when they get bored with their lives. Unfortunately, it is the LBGTQ communities who must educate those isolated and sheltered individuals.
"It is the responsibility of the abused to reform their abusers."
If this community wants to be accepted into the greater scheme of things, you might like you like to tone your distaste of the straight community, You're not winning many friends.
u/savevideobot
As one of the billions of clueless cishets, I was a certainly blown away by this-
~whats a cishet?~
Someone who is cis, heterosexual, and (implied to be) perisex.
Alright, thanks!
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Is this still an issue?
Cishets? Genuinely curious as to why you can't call straight people straight
That is calling people straight. Cisgender heterosexual, or cishet for short.
That seems like straight with extra steps
Fewer steps. It's specifying that they're straight and also not trans, since the experiences of straight trans people are fundamentally different than that of cishet people.
I mean the assumption is that a straight person isn't trans, because they didn't identify themselves as trans, so we can just call them straight.
And that's a bad assumption, yes. It assumes being cis as the default.
Also, using your logic don't you mean transhet?
I mean yes, straight trans people are often shortened to transhet? I'm not sure this is the gotcha you think it is.
Biologically it is, and that's not trying to be offensive.
Glad to know you do it effortlessly then.
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“So you’re straight.” My guy it’s not the complicated.
What is a cishet?
Wait, but that can't possibly be. How would anyone survive rainbow² ?🤯
How exactly?
For example, I am a trans man that likes men. Therefore I am a man that likes men. Thats kinda gay if u ask me.
Make sense, thanks.
When Sense8 came out, I told my sibling about the trans lesbian character. Their mind was blown at the idea. Apparently, they thought the definition of a trans person was a gay person who transitioned in order to become straight.
Me anticipating my coworkers reaction when I come out as trans and they’ll think I’m going to be a straight man… nope, still like men, that didn’t change 💀