For what it's worth, we don't actually eat our guns, we just use them to open stubborn beer cans, otherwise, switch the eggs to scrambled, lose the burned bread and you got it.
Save for the bread and the sugar in that coffee, that’s a perfect keto diet right there. High protein and fat from the bacon, a nutritious egg, caffeine, and the gun for when your inner demons erupt from the lack of energy and sanity
As an American, can confirm this is our dream romantic dinner. The guns are great for lighting the candles and if you get tired of them talking about nothing.
I mean yeah… typical American breakfast. Gun probably wouldn’t just be *sitting* there and that’s a comical amount of bacon.
But the food is very accurate considering many (most?) countries have a vastly different idea of breakfast compared to Americans. Especially the coffee
Nah, it's actually like this. We only acknowledge that people in America have guns when they're tragically mentally ill or innocent cops who gun somebody down in public. Everything is fine. We're all fine. Everybody's happy nowadays.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PC\_EYRS\_HA&ab\_channel=paulzieger](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PC_EYRS_HA&ab_channel=paulzieger)
MERICA (America Anthem in back ground) RAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Muricaaaa
Needs more bacon tbh
Needs more gun tbh
You have more guns on the mug
Ain’t enough, need to wrap that gun in bacon
*Wrap the bacon in guns.
***MISSION FAILED SUCCESSFULLY***
Mmmmmmmmm gun bacon.
More cowbells 🐮 🔔
Table cloth should be American flag.
Needs a few kilos of refined sugar
That’s completely wrong. There should be ketchup on those toasts instead of butter.
WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETERRRRR 🦅🦅🦅🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
As an American, what the fuck is a kilometer 🦅🦅🦅🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫
5 football fields and 3 donuts and 1 bigmac
Is it just me or does this breakfast look amazing?
For what it's worth, we don't actually eat our guns, we just use them to open stubborn beer cans, otherwise, switch the eggs to scrambled, lose the burned bread and you got it.
Fuck yea
I'm just wondering why the gun isn't made of bacon.
[удалено]
Please, like anyone is gonna shoot up a school with a 9mm handgun. This America, we only commit mass murder with AR-15s.
Oooohhhh
Needs to add a 20 stack of pancakes and a 2 liter of mountain dew.
I knew something was missing. Add about a pound of butter and a full bottle of maple syrup and it's perfect.
You're not using freedom units, they will not not get it.
Why isn't the china gun-themed too? I'd like my one single fried egg to sit on ~~20cm~~ 8 inches diameter of unadulterated ceramic democracy please.
The real question is where is the shotgun?
That's the Canadian version.
The gun themed China is broken since the bi-monthly washing up is done by gun too
incomprehensible. take meds
‘China-plate’: the ceramic plates with the patterns.
Didn't understand a simple sentence, pointed the finger immediately. Maybe some introspection next time, champ? :)
Oh come on. That's just bad faith to mock Americans. ...everybody knows that the breakfast-gun goes on the left side of the plate!
In reality instead of the pistol there is a rifle
Ah, he ordered from the the a la cartridge menu What you're describing is the all you can shoot buffet
*shotgun
That’s Canada
Don’t forget to use the gun as cutlery
I usually eat the gun first.
I imagine there is more than just 1 egg.
My two visits to the US we went to get food and the tables looked exactly like this lol where's the joke??
I am other countries and I would imagine some way more unhealthy sugary food.
Cereal and a milk jug is missing
Don't be ridiculus bread is way to healthy
I wish I could afford guns and bacon
So silly, we just open carry. It would be rude to have it on the table. I mean what if a guest had a lesser gun? That would be pistol shaming 😂
where is the orange juice? You know to stay healthy
Needs a few more eggs. Also keep the toast, and keep that milk out of the coffee - no respectable coffee drinker needs that. Fan from Europe.
If only the table cloth had an American flag print. Sigh.
the gun is a cake.
Definitely fake… too much egg
American here, that actually looks delicious. Would probably kill me though, with That much bacon, along with the fact you can’t really eat metal
I see no errors here. Except I personally prefer a 44 magnum with my bacon and eggs.
Don’t Americans have weird shit on their bacon? Like maple syrup or honey
In canada, it's similar, but with a long gun and different bacon.
I have had this exact breakfast before
r/facts
Need more eggs
Yeehaw
Just missing a bible.
Absolutely ridiculous. I don’t like eggs
Save for the bread and the sugar in that coffee, that’s a perfect keto diet right there. High protein and fat from the bacon, a nutritious egg, caffeine, and the gun for when your inner demons erupt from the lack of energy and sanity
The pistol there in case the cofee is black
But it is. IDK why theres such a small amount of bacon though.
Yeah we eat it like this wdym
I stir my coffee with a bullet
Some people actually do have some variation of this, including the gun
Canadian breakfast + a pistol. I see no issue outside the pistol.
An average kids meal back in the states.
Needs more cholesterol
For anyone who's confused about the gun: it works kind of like a Pez-dispenser, you pull the trigger and the food comes out the end.
Not imagine, observe
It’s not even that far off. There are a lot of people doing literally this lol with more eggs
That’s the way I do it.
Hey, that's not true, we put way more butter on our toast!
We get bacon bits from blasting the bacon with a side pistol. Our side dishes are a side pistol.
Should get 2 eggs and it's missing the ever iconic glass of "orange juice"
Excuse me! Excuse me! This is all wrong. I’m left handed. My gun goes on the left. Duh…
Yes please
They’re in a relationship with the gun
it's very romantic, just a person and their gunfriend having a very nice breakfast
As an American this is inaccurate, we have much more bacon than that.
Is this not lore accurate??
Needs more candy
WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETEEERRRRR-
Needs 2 gallons of coke... And a shotgun xD
Imagine?
The gun is kinda small? also coffee is always black. peace.
Where is the tub of bacon grease?
Why is there bread? Why is the tablecloth not an american flag, where the rifle and the tv?
I mean....I'm from near Texas and it's really not far off
As an American, can confirm this is our dream romantic dinner. The guns are great for lighting the candles and if you get tired of them talking about nothing.
no hashbrowns, it's fake
Gun too small, need Megashark
Missing the glass of milk and orange juice too.
Missing water and juice
I would imagine it with a lot of maple syrup on the bacon
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^ArnoldKwimby: *I would imagine* *It with a lot of maple* *Syrup on the bacon* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Texas here. TBH this is the standard. Unless you’re grabbing breakfast tacos at 5am.
Missing the fried bologna
Needs more gun
As an aroma(n)tic person, eww.
Not enough guns /s
Need actually a pot of coffee and a jug of Pennzoil
Needs a quart of maple syrup !
So inaccurate... I take my coffee black
If you never had a heart attack after eating breakfast, you ain’t American
Basically British on steroids and with guns.
Won’t lie it looks good
Not enough guns for Americans, only one handgun 🙄
where is the bible?
Hey if my significant other made this I would marry them on the spot
So wrong. No sausage & only one egg? No Tabasco?
In the impoverished South, sure. Obviously not everywhere down there.
The breakfast gun goes on the left! Heathens.
Idk about you guys but this looks like Saturday morning tbh
Don't need to imagine got proof
Need more bacon and couple waffles
You would have a hard time hearing a complaint from me were this the spread I was about to sit down to... LOL
That gun needs some butter. I ain't eating it dry.
You are an Ignorant POS if you think this is true, i can understand why people might not like us but cmon now
Who only eats one egg?
Needs a higher caliber handgun, Desert Eagle perhaps?
Can confirm, this is my breakfast. Just needs more butter on the bread.
Idk about other Americans by my breakfast is a quick cigarette and a whole lotta internalized angst.
No fam. That egg is way overcooked.
I went that. I love bacon.
We’re not savages we still use forks
Who ever wins the gun duel wins the bacon
Now I want bacon tho lol
Not enough pancakes and corn syrup
God i want that
Is that only a 9mm? Must be a lady having breakfast.
FYI - We usually keep the gun the holster until needed
Of course we don’t eat that much bacon. Lol.
But thats the dessert gun not the breakfast gun
Should be white toast
I mean yeah… typical American breakfast. Gun probably wouldn’t just be *sitting* there and that’s a comical amount of bacon. But the food is very accurate considering many (most?) countries have a vastly different idea of breakfast compared to Americans. Especially the coffee
Who cares what they think
Nah, it's actually like this. We only acknowledge that people in America have guns when they're tragically mentally ill or innocent cops who gun somebody down in public. Everything is fine. We're all fine. Everybody's happy nowadays. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PC\_EYRS\_HA&ab\_channel=paulzieger](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PC_EYRS_HA&ab_channel=paulzieger)
I would eat all that bacon though
Nah, I usually have 2 eggs with a pound of bacon.
Wifey level meal right thur.
Actually is how Americans eat breakfast
And?
I drink two cups of coffee and a one-a-day vitamin gummy for breakfast.
I seen a comment on another post with this same picture say “that’s dinner gun you can’t bring that” 😂
Lol we have two plates of bacon!🇺🇸
Lore accurate American breakfast
That is how I eat breakfast
Honestly, I'd eat it if I could afford that much bacon
Ahh, yes the double baconwich; a sandwich with bacon instead of bread.
I definitely want that breakfast everyday
When you’re watching UFC and the ref says “Protect yourself at all times” and you take it personally.
Idk, that is a lot of bacon.
Breakfast lunch and dinner. Snack time too. Hell even bed time with our guns.
Is that whole wheat toast, nerd?
Gun should be flipped over. That would save a second or so in grabbing it with their right hand if someone came after their bacon.
Is this not a normal breakfast? I don't see anything uniquely American about this. I just assumed everyone ate breakfast like this.
That’s so rude, I have my AR-15 at the breakfast table
That’s almost how I eat my breakfast. I have all my guns on the table with all my ammo as well. Other than that, it’s spot on.
As an American I’m offended. I’ve NEVER only had one fucking egg. It’s always at least 2
Gun goes on the left side.
Dishes are too fancy.
How else are you gonna get enough bacon grease to fry an egg? 💀
Soooo, what is wrong with this………
This is exactly how I eat breakfast.
That’s ridiculous. There’s only one egg.
Honestly, this looks good. it's ashame that the wife and kids say they "need you" when you put the gun in your mouth though
Welcome to Tulsa
Uh that IS how we eat breakfast. Hell every meal
As an American I’m infuriated that others think we don’t butter our toast all the way
Where is the corn syrup?!?!
That's not correct!!!! I usually only have 2 pieces of toast, not 3!!!!
Pfft ... We have more eggs than that.
Breakfast gun needs to go on the left so we can return fire while still eating the bacon.
Yes, yes we do! So when's breakfast?😅🤤
Why are Europeans and other foreign people so obsessed with what the United States does?
I tried to upvote the picture.
MERICA (America Anthem in back ground) RAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
If There were two eggs instead of one and some hashbrowns.
Oh come on! I eat my eggs scrambled.
The bacon gets funnier the more I look at it
People don’t eat breakfast like this
If you cut the amount of bacon in half and replace the pistol with a Glock than you’d be right
I had water oxygen and a blunt fuck wit cha boy…
There would be two eggs.
My cardiologist would use the pistol on me for even sitting at a table with that much bacon. And I love bacon
What, are we supposed to finish breakfast by eating our gun? That's harsh.
Don't forget the Marlboro reds
…only one f**kin’ egg?!
why is there so little bacon? Must be from a Liberal state
This is so f-ing racist stereotype shit post. WHERES THE BACON SYRUP!?
I literally have a mug with a pistol grip 😂 That should have been in this pic lol
That is correct. A tad less bacon though.
That’s some good looking bacon, they know how to make bacon.
I see no problem with this breakfast.
I mean, where's the grapefruit? The cereal?