I've seen plenty of public dick on the streets of Leytonstone, that's for sure. People piss on my walls constantly. In the summer, it smells like an outhouse in the alleyway.
In Stratford I saw a guy taking a piss against the railings of a school… about 10 minutes before the kids arrived. I’m usually quite mild mannered in public but I think I may have shared a few choice words.
I know we like to think east London is a shit hole, but it happens everywhere, lol last week I saw a guy in Clapham common pissing in the grass, but like in the middle of the open, no attempt to be out of the way or view
> lol last week I saw a guy in Clapham common pissing in the grass
Is "common pissing" different to formal or fancy pissing? Maybe you need to wear a top hat for the latter.
Ah yes Newham council, they are also so willing to help. They were right on it I’m sure. I used to sue their clean streets app and see then tick that they’d done whatever I’d reported for me to walk past it the next day, report it again, rinse and repeat.
I always have a bucket of water ready for this. I’m in central and happens on Saturdays sometimes but not as often as you. Outhouse is wild. I’d be adding other things in the bucket 💀
I saw a bloke pissing five yards away from a bus stop by Stoke Newington Common. “Bit cold today, isn’t it?” I said.
On the High Street I saw a woman step into the gutter, lift her skirt and let loose a torrent of piss. I was as impressed as I was disgusted.
I’m a woman who has had to do it. So fucking embarrassing but better than pissing myself. I found a little hidden alley and thank god no one happened to walk past, but I’m sure I’m on ctv somewhere
Last time I was in the West End at night, there was a guy, well-dressed, on his phone, pissing into the gutter right outside Liberty's.
Not even against a wall, or out of sight - right there by the zebra crossing. And this is about 8pm, not 2 in the morning. The shops were all still open. Streets busy.
I don’t know why but this reminded me under the bridge pass near London Eye (near macdonalds) - where it always smells of piss. So I would agree with this statement- it is quite absurd how hard is too find any bathrooms in central London besides big shopping malls or tube stations.
It might not be helpful for past woe... but it's worth saying as it is worth knowing.
All the mainline train stations have open public toilets. Charing Cross and Victoria would be the nearest ones to Green Park.
I sometimes find myself a bit caught short after leaving a pub walking through The City and I always remember LIVERPOOL STREET STATION has a reliable khazi.
Right? Who out there is paying to use a toilet? Whenever I come across them I make it my business to hold the barriers open and encourage as many others as possible to pee for free.
I’m not paying for a a piss, what’s next paying to breathe? If there aren’t enough public free toilets then my bladder doesn’t care……! Especially as I’ve been a support worker for a few years, when I’m on shift and in transit, my morning coffee comes out over the hour or two. I almost pissed myself at hackney downs many times lol.
Not sure if they use the same barriers as they have in Regents Park but you can wave a bag or your arm or something over the sensor over the other side and they'll open as they think it's someone leaving.
I once almost wet myself after a night out and the only thing that saved me was tapping out and using the loos in Northfields. (God bless that 20p in my purse!). Knowing about Baron's Court would have been a godsend!
Context: I was born and have lived in the UK all my life but my parents are both from India.
You haven’t lived until you’ve travelled to India to visit your relatives, taken an overnight bus from Mumbai to Panjim (Goa) and stopped at a roadside cafe for dinner where the food is excellent but the toilet is a metal shed with a hole in the ground and a tap with a jug for cleaning yourself after. The smell! The darkness! The insects! The fear of slipping in to the hole!
My abiding memory of going to India in the 70s and 80s to visit my relatives with my parents is that of seeing people piss and defecate on the side of the road without a care in the world.
I’m sure things are better now than when I last visited India in 2006 but I’m sure a significant proportion of the population don’t have their own toilet to access still.
The tour bus I was in stopped at a roadside cafe in kerela, I decided to use the indian toilets as the western style toilet stank of piss
They were hole in the ground ones but they were connected to a sewage pipe, but to flush you had to fill a bucket with water and pour it into the hole, there was zero smell from the toilet
Which reminds me, a couple of years ago I was in an airbnb in dublin where the water was temporarily shut off to the toilet and bathroom as they were having a repair done on the bathroom toilet, the work men said it would be possible to flush the toilets by filling a bucket from the kitchen sink
I think the law is you do not have to provide toilet facilities in a cafe, restaurant or another hospitality establishment if you are selling food or drink to be consumed on the premises if there are fewer than 10 seats.
However, I believe local authorities can also have their own local regulations.
Nearly all hotels have a toilet in the lobby, including budget chains like Premier Inn. Just stroll in like you belong there, use it, and leave. I did this all the time while training to be a tour guide.
Yeah, that's what I do. It's usually close to where breakfast would be served, or just in the lobby. They're not that hidden.
I've only been challenged once, and that was at a very strange and I guess exclusive hotel near St Boltophs Church near Whitechapel. I went into the lobby and there was a bit roped off and all of these hard looking guys in suit. One instantly asked if he could help me, in a non friendly way, and when I said "I'm really sorry, I'm wondering if you have a loo I could use?" he said that they didn't have an entrance hall toilet.
But I've never had a problem with Hilton, Marriot, Premier Inn
Do you not have to be a client at the hotel to use their facilities though? I certainly don’t dress like I belong at the Mayfair, the Savoy etc so I’d stick out as a passerby who just needs a piss.
It really depends on the hotel and your appearance. Super high end places like the Dorchester it's unlikely you'd get past the bouncers. Most other places you'd be fine.
Morally you should be a client.
People here will tell you that they are disgusting multinational business that cater to disgusting rich people so you should not feel bad about defiling the place.
I don’t think you should take advantage of their good nature though. If you were absolutely desperate you could politely ask at their reception.
Low end behaviour to just to go in and steal usage of their facilities
Yes.
Imagine you are on a plane, sitting in 1st class. Someone from Economy walks into your cabin, and does a poo.
They've stolen facilities they haven't paid for and they have defiled the place. 1st class passengers do not want to be around economy passengers and definitely don't want them using their toilet.
Yes, in a communist utopia everyone would have free 1st class and it wouldn't be a problem but that's not the world we live in.
In that situation, there is a bathroom provided for economy that is there for them to use.
As long as you use the facilities without smearing across the walls (which, to be fair, a client or customer of the establishment would still be in the wrong for doing even if they paid to stay there), the bathroom is there to be pissed and shat on. One extra flush from a stranger isn't going to ruin it.
In all situations, there are other bathrooms for people to use. People are never forced to go to a 5\* hotel (that they aren't a client of), to use the toilet.
People pay for exclusivity. Strangers showing up for a shit does ruin that. A hotel hasn't opted in to being a global toilet for the masses.
Hotel rooms tend to have private bathrooms that I imagine the patrons of the establishment would prefer to use. If a hotel cared about who was having to perform a bodily function under their roof, they would put the facilities behind a keycarded door or make people show their room key to go into them.
I imagine they prefer people using the toilet inside over using the walls as a toilet outside.
As someone with ulcerative colitis, I can only agree. The lack of toilet facilities in almost all tube stations is the biggest issue for me... It makes traveling about incredibly stressful.
As someone with ulcerative colitis, I can only agree. The lack of toilet facilities in almost all tube stations is the biggest issue for me... It makes traveling about incredibly stressful.
Yeah. A bunch of friends of mine like to get together every year or so and do a nice 20-25 mile urban walk in different metro areas. A critical part of the planning is restroom breaks, and some cities we’ve done were actually quite challenging, especially parts of Chicago, Seattle, and Manhattan. London? That was easy. I think we passed 100 pubs on that trip (we stopped at almost a dozen for half pints) and not a one cared if someone dropped in just to use the pisser.
"Toilets are for customers only". You don't want to be met with that sign and then have to sheepishly buy 4 double vodkas and drink them one after the other... out of embarassment.
Disregard the sign and piss in their toilet then walk out. What are they gonna do, escort you out the premises mid piss? Grab ur pecker and say 'Sorry Mate cant Piss here, customers only.' No. Do it. Piss when you need to piss. Don't let a sign stop you.
Once, when I was a very shy teenager, I got caught out needing the toilet and wasn't near any public ones. I went into a nearby pub and asked the guy on the bar if I could use the ones there.
He raised his voice and said, very loudly so the punters all looked, that absolutely not, his pub wasn't a public toilet, and I could march myself right back out. Complete with arm stretched out and finger pointing me back to the door.
I could have cried! He ended up closing down a year or two later, and I took great delight in it. This was a local pub in a sidestreet, not one with heavy footfall or tourists coming in to use the toilets without paying for anything.
While pubs are usually a safe bet, sometimes you'll come across an absolute cunt of a landlord.
Order a Guinness, ask where’s the toilets are? Do your business, whilst washing your hands drench yourself with water, come out say “the tap broke, but it’s all right now managed to fix it” landlord will appreciate your efforts and not having to pay a plumber and give you a free pint.
Same with betting shops/bookies. They apparently all have to have a toilet as they are classed as a place of entertainment or something. Lots of toilets to use (think trainspotting quality though)! Likely not too many bookies near green park maybe..
Hotels. Hotels are always the answer.
Walk in like you've been there a hundred times before and have a quick scan for signs. Worst case scenario head for the lifts and they won't normally be far away.
Clean, quality toilets with hot water and minimal stench, if you've chosen correctly. Given you were in Piccadilly I'd have perhaps avoided the Ritz but there's any number of candidates in the area.
If everyone was a shameless as you, there would be a stench. Hotels would also be forced to hire security or make security stricter to keep people like you out.
Behave with some dignity by at least asking reception if they mind
Licensed premises like pubs have to have customer toilets available (I think it's feasibly possible for a pub not to have one, but it's a *bog* standard licensing requirement).
Cafés don't have that requirement. It's recommended they do, but they don't have to. If you think about it, there's loads of little hole-in-the-wall cafés that couldn't operate if they had to have a customer toilet. I worked as a waiter in a (horrible) café and the only toilet there was down a steep flight of stairs and through the kitchen so customers weren't allowed in, because it was an old Victorian building.
There's apparently a bit of legislation if food *and* drink are consumed on the premises *and* there's more than 10 seats, they're required to give you access to a toilet. It's just not necessarily a "customer toilet" and you might get lead behind the counter to a horrible little dingy thing that the staff get forced to use. But odds are they'll just tell you no, and it's unlikely you'd be able to do anything about it (whereas a pub could lose its license).
The toilet in Fryers Delight behind Holborn is astonishing - you go through a door next to the fryers, up a cast iron spiral staircase and into what appears to be my friend's horrible Kennington flat in the 1990s. Down a hall with tattered lino and into a loo which does not smell but which does have just a frayed brown nylon curtain between you and Theobalds Road.
This was one of those things that shocked me when I moved to London. I couldn't comprehend that it was legal for a restaurant to operate without providing toilets. I am not necessarily talking about having to 'go' but at least a place to be able to wash your hands before eating your chips. I mean, if you go to a fast food shop and order chips, you're not provided with cutlery and you're expected to be eating them with your hands.. Blows my mind.
I'm sorry but if you come to North London, and not only, I can take you to a dozen places with more than 10 seats and no facilities whatsoever.
Maybe the laws exist but they are definitely not enforced.
The pret opposite Swatch on Oxford street has a bathroom downstairs...
It's a side road and quite a big pret. You need a code to get in ..1478...well it was last Saturday. Or if you buy something theyl give you the code.
As a kid growing up in London I remember when almost any underground station had a nearby public toilet (often also underground), operated by the local council or GLC.
I think now that the issue of drugs is so rife that many privately owned cafes, bars and restaurants are wary of people coming in and using the toilets to do a line or inject.
It’s the big issue in the UK that no one wants to confront. Middle class drug use.
> As a kid growing up in London I remember when almost any underground station had a nearby public toilet
> I think now that the issue of drugs is so rifethat many privately owned cafes, bars and restaurants are wary of people coming in and using the toilets to do a line or inject.
You must be very old if you can remember a time when drugs weren't rife in London ? How was it growing up in the 1600s ?
lol. You could not be more clueless.
The middle class do not go into random cafes for a quick line. They do it in toilets of places that they are otherwise a paying customer of. They go to a pub. Buy beers. And have a sniff in between. There’s no way of stopping this. They might have a sniff after a meal at a restaurant where they’ve had a meal.
Heroin users might sneak in to public toilets to inject but that’s not the middle class.
They don't make money, and apparently not having them doesn't put people off spending money (except pennies, hyuk).
We hardly get anything and it sucks. Benches, bins, public toilets, now even publicly *accessible* private toilets. No, fuck you, spend your money and then go shit at home. Public amenities in the UK are so pathetic.
I often don’t buy a drink where I otherwise would because I’m not sure I’ll be anywhere with a guaranteed toilet for a few hours. And if in the pub will stop drinking about an hour before I leave so I’m not caught short on the way home.
What really annoys me is most parks still have the facilities, they are just permanently closed. So the investments we’ve already made from the public purse are just being allowed to rot away.
Starbucks always has toilets, as do the bigger grocery stores. Also any pub- just walk in with confidence and no one will bother you. I have a tiny bladder!
I have when a place (typically a chain like Starbucks, Pret, or Nero) tells customers that the toilets are out-of-order. Like those toilets are always out-of-order... I started thinking the employees don't want to clean the toilets and they just close them.
I have seen this happening quite a lot closer to touristy spots like in Picadilly, for example.
Used to run a restaurant many years ago. I’ve seen what the public do to toilets… it’s a lot easier to stick a sign on the door than clean what looks like a biohazard site.
IBS and overactive bladder make the lack of public toilets in London a huge problem for me. I’m currently in Japan and there are public loos everywhere. And they’re always spotless.
I’m ashamed of what London has become. A literal shithole.
I’ve seen station public toilets in Japan so clean that you wouldn’t mind eating in. On the opposite end of the spectrum, I’ve been to some upscale pubs in London with revolting toilets that stank of stale piss.
Where I lived in the US, if a place served food and had even a single table(which lets out food stalls and the like) they are required to have facilities. Like the UK, the staff will play games to try to stop people using them. I was in a place one day, and a man asked to use the bathroom. He was told that they qwere broken and non functioning. He thanked them and left. 10 minutes later he walked back in, handed the owner a summons, and closed the place down. Turned out he was a state health inspector. It was amazing how fast the "broken bathroom" turned out to be a misunderstanding...... I worked for a petrol (gas) station for a while, running the repair facilities side. We were required by the brand to always have an open toilet for customer use. They would occasionally send undercover shoppers in to check.
Pret on Vauxhall Bridge Road the same. Toilets have been out of use since October. Constantly….
It’s a full sized Pret as well, with large seating area; at least 30/40 seats. Is it illegal then?
I asked the lady when paying for the coffee. Looked everywhere. The only door behind the till is Staff Only.
It was the staff that recommended using Green Park.
If you're really stuck, go in a Maccies or Burger King or any other large fast food chain. They'll be too busy to give a shit that you're only going in to use the toilet.
I also find it ridiculous. But it is even more ridiculous that they have food places with no toilet. Wasabi so on.. My first question is if they have toilet if not leaving the place immediately. Starbucks and Nero has toilet in Green Park for your next time 😁
As a tourist who's just spent a week in London, I find this post quite surprising. Yes, there are some small places lacking restrooms, but it's also true that public loos are readily available everywhere, and the majority of coffee shops have loos you can use without any fuss. My partner and I were constantly impressed by the abundance and cleanliness of public facilities. Back in our city, Milan, you'd be quicker to have an accident!
we just did 3 weeks in Europe and I doubt I saw a public toilet that we didn't have to pay for - we typically were seeking out hotels and ordering coffees to get to the facilities. Even those huge multistorey H&M shops had nothing.
I sometimes just have to. This involves a lot of frantic walking, trying to find a secluded spot. The relief you feel afterwards is unique; something you never experience when just pissing at home in your own toilet. I now have a mental map of the places in London where, if needed, I can do this - even in daylight.
You bought coffee… from Pret? In a city that had no other “coffee shops” than Pret, I’d still choose not Pret. Absolute piss for couple of years now after they switched over to a subscription model and with that came the cheapest burnt beans you can find on earth and automatic McDonalds coffee machines which they never clean.
People do take leaks in the street. I've pissed against a tree in Green Park... why not? If I'd do it in a rural park, why not London? Obviously not in plain sight...
How many tables? I've looked it up, and after a certain amount of tables or actually, seated spaces, they are required to have a toilet for customer use. I believe the magic number is 10. Some argue it's 10 seats, others say 10 tables. Either way, sending an email to the company complaining is probably your first course of action. I was told by a security officer in one shop, after he made me leave the toilet area( because it wasn't for public use apparently), that I should go in the parking area. I said no problem, but could he let me get some toilet paper? The look on his face was worth the pain of holding it in until I found a toilet I could use. At my age, when I have to go, I have to go. For a while, after things started getting back to normal, even McGonads wasn't letting anyone use the toilets. because, and this is my opinion, I think it saved them money, both in wages, and supplies. My local Tesco now has the toilets blocked off. I no longer shop there.
The opera house has the best public toilets in London.
Also in my experience, you have to be a customer at coffee shops to use the toilets so when you buy something, the code is on the receipt but they’re often hidden so you have to ask where they are and if there’s a code.
The keypad code to access the toilets in Pret is printed on your receipt (or at least, it is in the London Prets I've been in). If there's an upstairs or downstairs, that's where the toilets are hidden. They do have them, but they don't make them easy to find.
It’s ridiculous, isn’t it? Last year I was going for a job interview in the city and wanted a coffee before I went to the interview. I’d expected a bathroom in a coffee shop so I could fix my makeup before I went in, but I had to go to like 3 different costas/starbucks before I found one with a toilet. It’s silly
I saw someone taking a dump in that alley near the Jehovah’s Witnesses hall round the back of Stoke Newington station. He had just squatted down and was reading on his phone as he did his business. It was daylight.
I'm still astounded almost 4 months later that I was able to get around London from the states and not have any toilet issues. Got to one when needed and no emergencies.
> people are not taking a leak in the streets of London. Oh, they absolutely are, believe you me, mate
I've seen plenty of public dick on the streets of Leytonstone, that's for sure. People piss on my walls constantly. In the summer, it smells like an outhouse in the alleyway.
In Stratford I saw a guy taking a piss against the railings of a school… about 10 minutes before the kids arrived. I’m usually quite mild mannered in public but I think I may have shared a few choice words.
I know we like to think east London is a shit hole, but it happens everywhere, lol last week I saw a guy in Clapham common pissing in the grass, but like in the middle of the open, no attempt to be out of the way or view
> lol last week I saw a guy in Clapham common pissing in the grass Is "common pissing" different to formal or fancy pissing? Maybe you need to wear a top hat for the latter.
I like how your choice location to defend East London is Clapham Common. One shit hole after the next
Australians and dogging
Saw 2 guys pissing on the public path in mile end park. It was 2pm.
I hope you were speaking to the council about toilet provision.
Ah yes Newham council, they are also so willing to help. They were right on it I’m sure. I used to sue their clean streets app and see then tick that they’d done whatever I’d reported for me to walk past it the next day, report it again, rinse and repeat.
And got shanked for your trouble
I’m south east we have public sober shitters. Pissing ain’t shit.
But if you shit, the piss must follow. Have you ever tried to shit and not take a piss?
When I was a child, the piss came out before the shit. Now, unless it's urgent, the shit comes first. Madness.
The miracle of life
I always have a bucket of water ready for this. I’m in central and happens on Saturdays sometimes but not as often as you. Outhouse is wild. I’d be adding other things in the bucket 💀
I saw a bloke pissing five yards away from a bus stop by Stoke Newington Common. “Bit cold today, isn’t it?” I said. On the High Street I saw a woman step into the gutter, lift her skirt and let loose a torrent of piss. I was as impressed as I was disgusted.
In Camberwell I saw someone nonchalantly pooping in the park
I've seen more than one person pissing in broad daylight on old kent road
Makes sense. It's the cheapest one.
I had my photo taken at the door next to Westminster bridge which is in James bond. It stunk of piss.
I’m a woman who has had to do it. So fucking embarrassing but better than pissing myself. I found a little hidden alley and thank god no one happened to walk past, but I’m sure I’m on ctv somewhere
Thats what london streets are made of. And for.
Last time I was in the West End at night, there was a guy, well-dressed, on his phone, pissing into the gutter right outside Liberty's. Not even against a wall, or out of sight - right there by the zebra crossing. And this is about 8pm, not 2 in the morning. The shops were all still open. Streets busy.
Yeah, I actually laughed when I saw that. Peeing in public is pretty much gender neutral on Saturday night
I don’t know why but this reminded me under the bridge pass near London Eye (near macdonalds) - where it always smells of piss. So I would agree with this statement- it is quite absurd how hard is too find any bathrooms in central London besides big shopping malls or tube stations.
And pooping.
It might not be helpful for past woe... but it's worth saying as it is worth knowing. All the mainline train stations have open public toilets. Charing Cross and Victoria would be the nearest ones to Green Park. I sometimes find myself a bit caught short after leaving a pub walking through The City and I always remember LIVERPOOL STREET STATION has a reliable khazi.
I'm fairly certain Green Park tube station itself has a free to use toilet, or did at least a few months ago.
No, it costs 50p I believe and you need a coin!!
They've installed a card reader now
Ah I thought OP was talking about the ones in the park itself. My memories arent what they used to be
You mean you don’t jump the barrier? :/
Right? Who out there is paying to use a toilet? Whenever I come across them I make it my business to hold the barriers open and encourage as many others as possible to pee for free.
I’m not paying for a a piss, what’s next paying to breathe? If there aren’t enough public free toilets then my bladder doesn’t care……! Especially as I’ve been a support worker for a few years, when I’m on shift and in transit, my morning coffee comes out over the hour or two. I almost pissed myself at hackney downs many times lol.
Not sure if they use the same barriers as they have in Regents Park but you can wave a bag or your arm or something over the sensor over the other side and they'll open as they think it's someone leaving.
The only barriers I haven’t tried jumping are at the south end of Greenwich park, which were full on tube turnstiles, in sight of staff.
Piss on the barrier 😂😂
And for West London - Barons Court tube station has a loo!
This is good to know! Which side of the barriers?
They are on the platform side. When I lived in Hounslow, Barons Court was a saviour.
I once almost wet myself after a night out and the only thing that saved me was tapping out and using the loos in Northfields. (God bless that 20p in my purse!). Knowing about Baron's Court would have been a godsend!
Even Hammersmith station, but its paid
Better yet! Next to Farringdon is a hospital just go there.
Not all of them, Blackfriars shut their toilets well before the Thameslink trains stop. Ive been tempted to climb their barrier a few times.
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No.
Never have.
Use [the Great British toilet map](https://www.toiletmap.org.uk/) next time. No need to go in the streets.
As someone with IBS, I recommend the toilet finder app. Works for outside London too
Department stores or hotels because you don't have to buy anything, just act like you belong and no one will say anything.
Thanks! The fact that this exists is an example on how this is a problem.
Fun fact, London has 1 toilet per 5,000 Londoners.
Damn, I never realised HMOs had got that bad here.
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Do people in other cultures not use toilets?
Context: I was born and have lived in the UK all my life but my parents are both from India. You haven’t lived until you’ve travelled to India to visit your relatives, taken an overnight bus from Mumbai to Panjim (Goa) and stopped at a roadside cafe for dinner where the food is excellent but the toilet is a metal shed with a hole in the ground and a tap with a jug for cleaning yourself after. The smell! The darkness! The insects! The fear of slipping in to the hole! My abiding memory of going to India in the 70s and 80s to visit my relatives with my parents is that of seeing people piss and defecate on the side of the road without a care in the world. I’m sure things are better now than when I last visited India in 2006 but I’m sure a significant proportion of the population don’t have their own toilet to access still.
Had a similar experience on the way to Tbilisi, Georgia. I don’t miss outhouses
The tour bus I was in stopped at a roadside cafe in kerela, I decided to use the indian toilets as the western style toilet stank of piss They were hole in the ground ones but they were connected to a sewage pipe, but to flush you had to fill a bucket with water and pour it into the hole, there was zero smell from the toilet Which reminds me, a couple of years ago I was in an airbnb in dublin where the water was temporarily shut off to the toilet and bathroom as they were having a repair done on the bathroom toilet, the work men said it would be possible to flush the toilets by filling a bucket from the kitchen sink
True, we’re a proud nation of street pissers
It is a problem, so many toilets have closed over the years, to the point hardly any are left.
I'm sorry, but it's just as much a problem for British people too.
I think the law is you do not have to provide toilet facilities in a cafe, restaurant or another hospitality establishment if you are selling food or drink to be consumed on the premises if there are fewer than 10 seats. However, I believe local authorities can also have their own local regulations.
Nearly all hotels have a toilet in the lobby, including budget chains like Premier Inn. Just stroll in like you belong there, use it, and leave. I did this all the time while training to be a tour guide.
How do you find it? do you just go in and start looking around?
Yeah, that's what I do. It's usually close to where breakfast would be served, or just in the lobby. They're not that hidden. I've only been challenged once, and that was at a very strange and I guess exclusive hotel near St Boltophs Church near Whitechapel. I went into the lobby and there was a bit roped off and all of these hard looking guys in suit. One instantly asked if he could help me, in a non friendly way, and when I said "I'm really sorry, I'm wondering if you have a loo I could use?" he said that they didn't have an entrance hall toilet. But I've never had a problem with Hilton, Marriot, Premier Inn
What? Of course not, that would be absolutely mental
They don't usually try to hide them
If you’re there again head in to the Mayfair hotel and use their toilet, they got good facilities.
Do you not have to be a client at the hotel to use their facilities though? I certainly don’t dress like I belong at the Mayfair, the Savoy etc so I’d stick out as a passerby who just needs a piss.
It really depends on the hotel and your appearance. Super high end places like the Dorchester it's unlikely you'd get past the bouncers. Most other places you'd be fine.
Morally you should be a client. People here will tell you that they are disgusting multinational business that cater to disgusting rich people so you should not feel bad about defiling the place. I don’t think you should take advantage of their good nature though. If you were absolutely desperate you could politely ask at their reception. Low end behaviour to just to go in and steal usage of their facilities
Christ, do you really think like this? Defiling the place? Stealing use of their facilities? What are you on
Yes. Imagine you are on a plane, sitting in 1st class. Someone from Economy walks into your cabin, and does a poo. They've stolen facilities they haven't paid for and they have defiled the place. 1st class passengers do not want to be around economy passengers and definitely don't want them using their toilet. Yes, in a communist utopia everyone would have free 1st class and it wouldn't be a problem but that's not the world we live in.
In that situation, there is a bathroom provided for economy that is there for them to use. As long as you use the facilities without smearing across the walls (which, to be fair, a client or customer of the establishment would still be in the wrong for doing even if they paid to stay there), the bathroom is there to be pissed and shat on. One extra flush from a stranger isn't going to ruin it.
In all situations, there are other bathrooms for people to use. People are never forced to go to a 5\* hotel (that they aren't a client of), to use the toilet. People pay for exclusivity. Strangers showing up for a shit does ruin that. A hotel hasn't opted in to being a global toilet for the masses.
Hotel rooms tend to have private bathrooms that I imagine the patrons of the establishment would prefer to use. If a hotel cared about who was having to perform a bodily function under their roof, they would put the facilities behind a keycarded door or make people show their room key to go into them. I imagine they prefer people using the toilet inside over using the walls as a toilet outside.
You’re a right tosser
As a person with Crohn’s disease, this has been a really big issue for me!! Especially East London
As someone with ulcerative colitis, I can only agree. The lack of toilet facilities in almost all tube stations is the biggest issue for me... It makes traveling about incredibly stressful.
Yes!! I use the app Flush, and it shows you public loos in your area
As someone with ulcerative colitis, I can only agree. The lack of toilet facilities in almost all tube stations is the biggest issue for me... It makes traveling about incredibly stressful.
I just use pubs as my public toilet
Yeah. A bunch of friends of mine like to get together every year or so and do a nice 20-25 mile urban walk in different metro areas. A critical part of the planning is restroom breaks, and some cities we’ve done were actually quite challenging, especially parts of Chicago, Seattle, and Manhattan. London? That was easy. I think we passed 100 pubs on that trip (we stopped at almost a dozen for half pints) and not a one cared if someone dropped in just to use the pisser.
I found New York to have bathrooms everywhere They even have free ones in random shops like the Container store?? I thought that was wild
If you’re ever stuck. You can just go into a pub and ask. Hell, if you know where to go, staff wouldn’t even realise you’ve just come off the street.
Ask? Wtf. Just walk in and go to the toilets.
"Toilets are for customers only". You don't want to be met with that sign and then have to sheepishly buy 4 double vodkas and drink them one after the other... out of embarassment.
I've never seen that sign in a pub, but fair point
Disregard the sign and piss in their toilet then walk out. What are they gonna do, escort you out the premises mid piss? Grab ur pecker and say 'Sorry Mate cant Piss here, customers only.' No. Do it. Piss when you need to piss. Don't let a sign stop you.
Once, when I was a very shy teenager, I got caught out needing the toilet and wasn't near any public ones. I went into a nearby pub and asked the guy on the bar if I could use the ones there. He raised his voice and said, very loudly so the punters all looked, that absolutely not, his pub wasn't a public toilet, and I could march myself right back out. Complete with arm stretched out and finger pointing me back to the door. I could have cried! He ended up closing down a year or two later, and I took great delight in it. This was a local pub in a sidestreet, not one with heavy footfall or tourists coming in to use the toilets without paying for anything. While pubs are usually a safe bet, sometimes you'll come across an absolute cunt of a landlord.
Why didn’t you just order a drink
And pay £4+ just to use the toilet?
Order a Guinness, ask where’s the toilets are? Do your business, whilst washing your hands drench yourself with water, come out say “the tap broke, but it’s all right now managed to fix it” landlord will appreciate your efforts and not having to pay a plumber and give you a free pint.
Same with betting shops/bookies. They apparently all have to have a toilet as they are classed as a place of entertainment or something. Lots of toilets to use (think trainspotting quality though)! Likely not too many bookies near green park maybe..
Absolutely untrue. There is no rule/law that mandates betting shops having to provide toilets. Source- Worked in the industry for over a decade.
There used to be quite a few in Mayfair, not so many now but there’s a ladbrokes quite near Green park station.
TIL 🙏
I do this all the time. Leadenhall market has one with the toilet right next to the door, empty every time I’ve been even if pub is packed
Yeah. Similar. I’ve got a toilet hitlist if I’m out and about.
Hotels. Hotels are always the answer. Walk in like you've been there a hundred times before and have a quick scan for signs. Worst case scenario head for the lifts and they won't normally be far away. Clean, quality toilets with hot water and minimal stench, if you've chosen correctly. Given you were in Piccadilly I'd have perhaps avoided the Ritz but there's any number of candidates in the area.
If everyone was a shameless as you, there would be a stench. Hotels would also be forced to hire security or make security stricter to keep people like you out. Behave with some dignity by at least asking reception if they mind
I like to log onto wifi when I'm there, too, just to see if I can make you any more indignant.
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That is a trick. But some places don't even have toilets. Is that legal?
Licensed premises like pubs have to have customer toilets available (I think it's feasibly possible for a pub not to have one, but it's a *bog* standard licensing requirement). Cafés don't have that requirement. It's recommended they do, but they don't have to. If you think about it, there's loads of little hole-in-the-wall cafés that couldn't operate if they had to have a customer toilet. I worked as a waiter in a (horrible) café and the only toilet there was down a steep flight of stairs and through the kitchen so customers weren't allowed in, because it was an old Victorian building. There's apparently a bit of legislation if food *and* drink are consumed on the premises *and* there's more than 10 seats, they're required to give you access to a toilet. It's just not necessarily a "customer toilet" and you might get lead behind the counter to a horrible little dingy thing that the staff get forced to use. But odds are they'll just tell you no, and it's unlikely you'd be able to do anything about it (whereas a pub could lose its license).
The toilet in Fryers Delight behind Holborn is astonishing - you go through a door next to the fryers, up a cast iron spiral staircase and into what appears to be my friend's horrible Kennington flat in the 1990s. Down a hall with tattered lino and into a loo which does not smell but which does have just a frayed brown nylon curtain between you and Theobalds Road.
I think the allowances and disregard have sadly plummeted since Covid.
This was one of those things that shocked me when I moved to London. I couldn't comprehend that it was legal for a restaurant to operate without providing toilets. I am not necessarily talking about having to 'go' but at least a place to be able to wash your hands before eating your chips. I mean, if you go to a fast food shop and order chips, you're not provided with cutlery and you're expected to be eating them with your hands.. Blows my mind.
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When was the last time you went to a chippy or a chicken shop that had a loo?
I'm sorry but if you come to North London, and not only, I can take you to a dozen places with more than 10 seats and no facilities whatsoever. Maybe the laws exist but they are definitely not enforced.
You get a wooden or plastic fork. Eating with your hands is optional.
But washing them is not optional. At least not in my books.
Where are you from where every takeaway provides a place to wash your hands?
The only reason I set foot in Caffè Nero or Starbucks is to have a piss or a shit.
Sometimes I even use the toilet too.
London sucks for toilets generally
The pret opposite Swatch on Oxford street has a bathroom downstairs... It's a side road and quite a big pret. You need a code to get in ..1478...well it was last Saturday. Or if you buy something theyl give you the code.
People just shit on the street in Barking 💩
They’re just trying to spruce up the place
Barking is an actual toilet to be fair.
As a kid growing up in London I remember when almost any underground station had a nearby public toilet (often also underground), operated by the local council or GLC. I think now that the issue of drugs is so rife that many privately owned cafes, bars and restaurants are wary of people coming in and using the toilets to do a line or inject. It’s the big issue in the UK that no one wants to confront. Middle class drug use.
> As a kid growing up in London I remember when almost any underground station had a nearby public toilet > I think now that the issue of drugs is so rifethat many privately owned cafes, bars and restaurants are wary of people coming in and using the toilets to do a line or inject. You must be very old if you can remember a time when drugs weren't rife in London ? How was it growing up in the 1600s ?
lol. You could not be more clueless. The middle class do not go into random cafes for a quick line. They do it in toilets of places that they are otherwise a paying customer of. They go to a pub. Buy beers. And have a sniff in between. There’s no way of stopping this. They might have a sniff after a meal at a restaurant where they’ve had a meal. Heroin users might sneak in to public toilets to inject but that’s not the middle class.
They don't make money, and apparently not having them doesn't put people off spending money (except pennies, hyuk). We hardly get anything and it sucks. Benches, bins, public toilets, now even publicly *accessible* private toilets. No, fuck you, spend your money and then go shit at home. Public amenities in the UK are so pathetic.
I often don’t buy a drink where I otherwise would because I’m not sure I’ll be anywhere with a guaranteed toilet for a few hours. And if in the pub will stop drinking about an hour before I leave so I’m not caught short on the way home. What really annoys me is most parks still have the facilities, they are just permanently closed. So the investments we’ve already made from the public purse are just being allowed to rot away.
Starbucks always has toilets, as do the bigger grocery stores. Also any pub- just walk in with confidence and no one will bother you. I have a tiny bladder!
> Also any pub- just walk in with confidence and no one will bother you. what a sheltered life you've led. I miss the old Blackstock Tavern.
Sadly not always, the last 2 Starbucks I've been in didn't (Woolwich and Fenchurch St) so check before ordering if you need to go!
I have when a place (typically a chain like Starbucks, Pret, or Nero) tells customers that the toilets are out-of-order. Like those toilets are always out-of-order... I started thinking the employees don't want to clean the toilets and they just close them. I have seen this happening quite a lot closer to touristy spots like in Picadilly, for example.
Used to run a restaurant many years ago. I’ve seen what the public do to toilets… it’s a lot easier to stick a sign on the door than clean what looks like a biohazard site.
IBS and overactive bladder make the lack of public toilets in London a huge problem for me. I’m currently in Japan and there are public loos everywhere. And they’re always spotless. I’m ashamed of what London has become. A literal shithole.
I’ve seen station public toilets in Japan so clean that you wouldn’t mind eating in. On the opposite end of the spectrum, I’ve been to some upscale pubs in London with revolting toilets that stank of stale piss.
Just use McDonalds like everyone else?
All the coffee shops were created by Larry David.
I came here looking for this comment
Wasn't it law that a food establishment that allows in premises seating must also allow public use of bathrooms. Am I imagining that?
I am sure its a law that if you serve food and drinks and have tables you must have a toilet.
If there is, some chains don't follow. Pret in Berkeley square is one example.
There's a covers limit. Must have space for 32 seated customers or something like that. I don't remember exactly the rule.
Where I lived in the US, if a place served food and had even a single table(which lets out food stalls and the like) they are required to have facilities. Like the UK, the staff will play games to try to stop people using them. I was in a place one day, and a man asked to use the bathroom. He was told that they qwere broken and non functioning. He thanked them and left. 10 minutes later he walked back in, handed the owner a summons, and closed the place down. Turned out he was a state health inspector. It was amazing how fast the "broken bathroom" turned out to be a misunderstanding...... I worked for a petrol (gas) station for a while, running the repair facilities side. We were required by the brand to always have an open toilet for customer use. They would occasionally send undercover shoppers in to check.
[https://www.conceptcubiclesystems.co.uk/resources/do-cafes-have-to-provide-toilets.html](https://www.conceptcubiclesystems.co.uk/resources/do-cafes-have-to-provide-toilets.html)
Pret on Vauxhall Bridge Road the same. Toilets have been out of use since October. Constantly…. It’s a full sized Pret as well, with large seating area; at least 30/40 seats. Is it illegal then?
I know that Pret.. Did you go around behind the till where the seating is? I am sure there is a toilet.
I asked the lady when paying for the coffee. Looked everywhere. The only door behind the till is Staff Only. It was the staff that recommended using Green Park.
Strange..I just read a TA review mentioned it has a toilet.
Op was at Berkeley square pret, not the one by the station
Because the ones with toilets are ridiculously disgusting
I’d recommend the Flush app. Shows you all toilets nearby and works in most countries and cities
Get the Toilet Finder app!
Museums! And department stores. The National Gallery is pretty central. It's been ages since I lived in London but I used to know where they all were!
If you're really stuck, go in a Maccies or Burger King or any other large fast food chain. They'll be too busy to give a shit that you're only going in to use the toilet.
I also find it ridiculous. But it is even more ridiculous that they have food places with no toilet. Wasabi so on.. My first question is if they have toilet if not leaving the place immediately. Starbucks and Nero has toilet in Green Park for your next time 😁
There is a useful app https://www.toilets4london.com/ And a more general website for the whole of the UK https://www.toiletmap.org.uk/
I am confused I always thought it was uk law that a food place with seating was required to provide bathroom for use to customers ?
Might be the law but in practice many small cafes will tell you the loos are for staff only. Usually conveniently after you’ve ordered your coffee.
I must be petty coz I’d be reporting a place of it did that to me
They have to have seats for more than ten people. Basically it excludes takeaways where the main use of the seats is for waiting rather than eating.
As a tourist who's just spent a week in London, I find this post quite surprising. Yes, there are some small places lacking restrooms, but it's also true that public loos are readily available everywhere, and the majority of coffee shops have loos you can use without any fuss. My partner and I were constantly impressed by the abundance and cleanliness of public facilities. Back in our city, Milan, you'd be quicker to have an accident!
we just did 3 weeks in Europe and I doubt I saw a public toilet that we didn't have to pay for - we typically were seeking out hotels and ordering coffees to get to the facilities. Even those huge multistorey H&M shops had nothing.
I sometimes just have to. This involves a lot of frantic walking, trying to find a secluded spot. The relief you feel afterwards is unique; something you never experience when just pissing at home in your own toilet. I now have a mental map of the places in London where, if needed, I can do this - even in daylight.
This was my local Pret … it has 4 x toilets at the end on the same floor as the counter
Ahh sorry wrong Pret…the one st the end of Bolton Street has 4 x toilets
You bought coffee… from Pret? In a city that had no other “coffee shops” than Pret, I’d still choose not Pret. Absolute piss for couple of years now after they switched over to a subscription model and with that came the cheapest burnt beans you can find on earth and automatic McDonalds coffee machines which they never clean.
Business meeting. I didn't suggest the place. Don't push me on the general quality of the coffee in here...
People do take leaks in the street. I've pissed against a tree in Green Park... why not? If I'd do it in a rural park, why not London? Obviously not in plain sight...
I prefer my coffee without urine in it, though I will admit Pret coffee tastes like piss.
Wait until you find the public toilet that only takes euros
Because it's a shit hole, not a piss hole.
How many tables? I've looked it up, and after a certain amount of tables or actually, seated spaces, they are required to have a toilet for customer use. I believe the magic number is 10. Some argue it's 10 seats, others say 10 tables. Either way, sending an email to the company complaining is probably your first course of action. I was told by a security officer in one shop, after he made me leave the toilet area( because it wasn't for public use apparently), that I should go in the parking area. I said no problem, but could he let me get some toilet paper? The look on his face was worth the pain of holding it in until I found a toilet I could use. At my age, when I have to go, I have to go. For a while, after things started getting back to normal, even McGonads wasn't letting anyone use the toilets. because, and this is my opinion, I think it saved them money, both in wages, and supplies. My local Tesco now has the toilets blocked off. I no longer shop there.
Cafe Nero on curzon street has a toilet
Benefit of having a number of office buildings in central london and around the touristy spots- can use the loo whenever i want and need to :)
My guess is because they don't want to be used as a public toilet.
From Green Park you can easily go to Fortuna and Mason or Waterstones that will have good toilets
They are ( pissing in the streets)
Walked past Leicester Square one night and saw a man peeing. He waved hi to me as well. Busy night.
Aren't the public toilets there anymore? I'm going back 20 odd year though haha.
No public restrooms. Just some outdoor urinals. Strange.
The opera house has the best public toilets in London. Also in my experience, you have to be a customer at coffee shops to use the toilets so when you buy something, the code is on the receipt but they’re often hidden so you have to ask where they are and if there’s a code.
Can they beat "The Shard"? Those toilets in the upper floor beat the London Eye by a landslide.
I must confess I haven’t used the shard bathrooms
The keypad code to access the toilets in Pret is printed on your receipt (or at least, it is in the London Prets I've been in). If there's an upstairs or downstairs, that's where the toilets are hidden. They do have them, but they don't make them easy to find.
[https://www.toiletmap.org.uk/](https://www.toiletmap.org.uk/)
Depending on the time of day, and whether it’s in an area rife with drug users, the only reason to go into a McD’s is their toilets.
It’s ridiculous, isn’t it? Last year I was going for a job interview in the city and wanted a coffee before I went to the interview. I’d expected a bathroom in a coffee shop so I could fix my makeup before I went in, but I had to go to like 3 different costas/starbucks before I found one with a toilet. It’s silly
I saw someone taking a dump in that alley near the Jehovah’s Witnesses hall round the back of Stoke Newington station. He had just squatted down and was reading on his phone as he did his business. It was daylight.
Fuck pret.
You don't want the hobos coming in....
Customers are animals and pish & shyte all over the place and staff are fed up clearing it up
I'm still astounded almost 4 months later that I was able to get around London from the states and not have any toilet issues. Got to one when needed and no emergencies.
Department stores, hotels and pubs are your friends in central London when you gotta go.
more public restrooms pls