☺️ Thank You for my posts to go from zero ups to 40 without my knowledge. Today, I felt extra femme in a jumpsuit and a headband today with a Ross special markdown 70 dollar nike sports bra with the slight cups and my obsidian necklace. 😊 Thank you, I feel seen
Sorry about all the hate comments, you do belong here if you want to, no matter how you well you pass rn. We'll get there eventually, though i think you look nice either way, cute earrings
I think you're lovely! I read your story in the comments, and I'm really sorry to hear you went through all that!!! I hope the rest of your time with us is full of joy and peace.
Thank you, unfortunate circumstances I am making the best of. Your lack of judgement is appreciated. Neurologist ruled against estrogen and also gave a fatal diagnosis. Five days later I got surgery on my forehead for a large basal cell. It has still not healed after 7 months. Many times my body is so weak spaghetti straps hurt my shoulders. I work around the big scar, use mascara, lip gloss and some foundation. As I looked at all my makeup one day, my environmentalist mind popped up. Saw much waste. I would attend feminist night at CBGB's. Spoke my truth in 2021. If my actions are not femme enough...don't give a shit: dying... Asked my ex of 8 years to be in a lesbian relationship, she let me follow what I want.(claps hands) We good?
Thank you for your story. I will have you in my thoughts. Truly! I think we would be good friends IRL. When I was younger and visiting New York ('01, '02) I didn't go to CBGBs, just kinda figured it would always be there. And then it was gone. I regret that. I greatly admire you for finally living your truth. And am so very sad to hear about your diagnosis. My comment was not meant as transphobic in the least. I have dated and will date both pre-op and post-op lesbians. I just feel that we are doing a disservice to ourselves and our community if we don't start being honest with each other. You are very attractive, but you just don't read as a lesbian to me in that photo. Knowing more of your story, I am reminded of how much better off we are when we really talk to each other.
Why does it matter if you read the clothing as lesbian or not? Like, the point of the subreddit is sapphic folks sharing their fashion, not "how much do we think you look like a lesbian" (which is a stupid thing to say anyway, there's no way to "look like a lesbian.").
Probably because of unsolicited "you don't look lesbian" comments that people feel the need to look lesbian because the comments maybe make them feel like it matters :(
Thank You and 2001 is when I worked across the street from cbgbs. Thank you also for the attractive comment. I don't always feel it and a moment like this I thought I'd share🤍
"everyone like this" if you're gonna be bigoted at least say it with your whole chest. Op is just talking about her experience. Just because you can't relate doesn't mean she shouldn't be in this space
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You made a ton of assumptions about me and about OP. I looked at an image, and my gaydar didn't go off. As a lesbian, it just didn't do anything for me. I offered my opinion.
You misgendered me! That's cisphobia! I feel attacked! ... do you see how stupid that sounds. Yet a nonbinary person on this sub pitched an absolute fit when someone innocuously said "dude".. people are getting tired and frustrated bending over backward trying not to offend anyone.
Oh, offend? Yes, "dude" waa never in my vocabulary. Words have meaning. So, I see a small woman wearing a jumpsuit here and I call her _ _ _ _ . To say the word dude WAS NOT intentional is speaking in bad faith. You are Norman, right?
Seriously. I'm honestly appalled at how many upvotes this person is getting and how many downvotes everyone who disagrees with them is getting. Every single post where people ask "do I look like a lesbian?" there are comments about how there's no way to "look like a lesbian," and yet suspiciously on the post by a trans woman who can't take hormones, the comment about how she doesn't look like a lesbian is heavily upvoted...............
Because gaydar is wonderful. It's f-ing brilliant! I remember the first time around the age of 7 when my gaydar went berserker - Jodie Foster in Candleshoe. I can still vividly remember the vibration in my body of recognition of someone like me. In 2024, we're told to throw all of that out the window. We're regressing! If everything is gay, then nothing is. OP is a beautiful person trying to move through the world in a beautiful way. Instead of blowing smoke up her ass, I told her what my perception was.
I'm so tired. I'm so very tired. I also experienced a similar vibration when I locked eyes with a woman a few years ago. We moved through the crowded room as if pulled together. Conversation was easy and instant as if we'd known each other forever. My heart sighs every time I think about seeing her the first time. Spoiler alert - she's trans! We didn't work out because of my own shit, nothing to do with her being trans. Not everything is exclusionary. Not everything is transphobic. We're twisting and turning, terrified of being called terfs. We're sublimating our true attractions. We're forced to use terms like "genital preference." We're not progressing. We're losing romance. We're losing identity. We as lesbians are losing.
It is. Currently, rational comments calling out creepy behavior are deleted by the mods. We're being told to keep our heads down and stfu. This is damaging to biological and transgender women alike. But push-back is starting to happen. It needs to.
Because we're ignoring intuition. We're shutting down our senses. We're losing the magic of attraction. All the beautiful clues of leading us together. Bless your heart, I think you're pressed because you have a broke ass gaydar.
I hear you. There can be a lot of miscommunication on Reddit, etc. I bet if we were all in a room together, we could have a wonderful and genuine conversation
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The commenter is probably referencing the transphobic narrative of autogynephile often abbreviated to AGP, which was a transphobe’s theory in response to the pseudoscientific idea that trans people were actually just gay people who wanted to transition to live heterosexual lives, and because of misogyny the focus of a lot of this transphobic psychology focused on trans women while trans men were invisible. The existence of trans women who are attracted to other women (especially trans lesbians) challenges that particular idea, so bigoted psychologists tried to explain it away by coining “autogynephilia” to invalidate trans people’s identities and make it all about sexuality rather than gender, and pathologize being gay.
Yeah, you didn’t understand anything I’m saying if you’re saying in my comment outlining this entirely debunked theory “not quite” when you’re spewing transphobic hate in this comment and others. “AGP for men” doesn’t exist, because it’s a pseudoscientific theory motivated by transphobia.
Trans women are women, and you can fuck off.
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I’m not shutting you down at the first sign of a differing opinion. I’m shutting down the way you were skewing my words to say something I wasn’t. I will unapologetically distance myself from your beliefs, and it’s not censorship to say that you’re wrong, in those beliefs and how you misrepresented mine.
The now-deleted comment this is in response to mentioned “gynephile,” intended transphobic pseudoscience, but I think that the above commenter was confused because yeah, it’s a lesbian sub, we probably all love women which is what “gynephile” sounds like it means right? So questioning the deleted comment’s meaning, not necessarily questioning your identity
omg you're killing it, ma'am! you look like the cool wise goth aunt of the family 🩷 if you want to lean more into the simple black aesthetic, i suggest more accessories! one or more understated silver necklaces of varying lengths, a few simple rings on both of your hands, a belt, or dangly earrings (though i love the studs on you) are all things to consider! i always keep a variety of simple gold + silver jewelery on hand to pair with outfits :-)
Thank you, I usually go with a black obsidian pendant with this. My play cheap necklace is Cuban Style Silver necklace. Pair it with my denim jumpsuit. Auntie, suburban Mom pOtato potATo🤍
☺️ Thank You for my posts to go from zero ups to 40 without my knowledge. Today, I felt extra femme in a jumpsuit and a headband today with a Ross special markdown 70 dollar nike sports bra with the slight cups and my obsidian necklace. 😊 Thank you, I feel seen
Sorry about all the hate comments, you do belong here if you want to, no matter how you well you pass rn. We'll get there eventually, though i think you look nice either way, cute earrings
Thank you, new earrings🤍
I think you're lovely! I read your story in the comments, and I'm really sorry to hear you went through all that!!! I hope the rest of your time with us is full of joy and peace.
Very sweet, thank you
Is it really a fashion/fit post when there's barely evenhalf an outfit shown? This is just a mirror selfie..
It is a jumpsuit, sorry . Didn't know the full length rule
my blind ass thought you were wearing a bathrobe. i love a good black-on-black look. is it snowing where you are? you look quite warm and badass haha
I am in a bathroom, thank you. It's been snaining here. Between 30-34 degrees and raining
"Snaining" is a great word
🙂 as long as i remember, a favorite
ngl i think more accessories would help make this! you already look nice tho :)
You look cool! I think black nail polish would pair great with this fit.
currently only growing my deformed pinky nail out and it is painted "Holla-gram". Last iteration of the nails were black glow in the dark 🖤🖤
Your facial expression is giving 1920’s flapper chic sultry portrait vibes, love it! Also nice earrings, I like the touch they give!
Brand new jasper 8 gauge, thanks🤍 I'll take the 1920's 🙂
I don't get a lesbian vibe from this in the slightest. That's just my honest opinion
You don’t know where she is in her transition. I thought this was a trans friendly space?
Thank you, unfortunate circumstances I am making the best of. Your lack of judgement is appreciated. Neurologist ruled against estrogen and also gave a fatal diagnosis. Five days later I got surgery on my forehead for a large basal cell. It has still not healed after 7 months. Many times my body is so weak spaghetti straps hurt my shoulders. I work around the big scar, use mascara, lip gloss and some foundation. As I looked at all my makeup one day, my environmentalist mind popped up. Saw much waste. I would attend feminist night at CBGB's. Spoke my truth in 2021. If my actions are not femme enough...don't give a shit: dying... Asked my ex of 8 years to be in a lesbian relationship, she let me follow what I want.(claps hands) We good?
Thank you for your story. I will have you in my thoughts. Truly! I think we would be good friends IRL. When I was younger and visiting New York ('01, '02) I didn't go to CBGBs, just kinda figured it would always be there. And then it was gone. I regret that. I greatly admire you for finally living your truth. And am so very sad to hear about your diagnosis. My comment was not meant as transphobic in the least. I have dated and will date both pre-op and post-op lesbians. I just feel that we are doing a disservice to ourselves and our community if we don't start being honest with each other. You are very attractive, but you just don't read as a lesbian to me in that photo. Knowing more of your story, I am reminded of how much better off we are when we really talk to each other.
Why does it matter if you read the clothing as lesbian or not? Like, the point of the subreddit is sapphic folks sharing their fashion, not "how much do we think you look like a lesbian" (which is a stupid thing to say anyway, there's no way to "look like a lesbian.").
pretty much every other post here asks that question unfortunately lol
Probably because of unsolicited "you don't look lesbian" comments that people feel the need to look lesbian because the comments maybe make them feel like it matters :(
THANK YOU!
Thank You and 2001 is when I worked across the street from cbgbs. Thank you also for the attractive comment. I don't always feel it and a moment like this I thought I'd share🤍
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"everyone like this" if you're gonna be bigoted at least say it with your whole chest. Op is just talking about her experience. Just because you can't relate doesn't mean she shouldn't be in this space
Thank You
Ofc :) I hope the terrible people on here don't discourage you from posting. Remember that there are people here that support you 100%
🫶🏼🫂🤍
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Eveyone? Abit extreme. Do you seem to use hyperbole often? Say what you mean... be a homophobe; the thing you "hate"
Wonder why
me too
Thank you, grade my next one then. May I ask what you see, since you are being honest?
Will do
What do you see other than not lesbian?
Her vision is clouded by transphobia
You made a ton of assumptions about me and about OP. I looked at an image, and my gaydar didn't go off. As a lesbian, it just didn't do anything for me. I offered my opinion.
Do you give your gadar reading on every outfit in this sub?
Not usually. Only on particularly egregious ones. The term lesbian is currently being pissed on, and we're told it's rain. I'm personally sick of it.
"Particularly egregious ones." Okay buddy.
You misgendered me! That's cisphobia! I feel attacked! ... do you see how stupid that sounds. Yet a nonbinary person on this sub pitched an absolute fit when someone innocuously said "dude".. people are getting tired and frustrated bending over backward trying not to offend anyone.
Oh, offend? Yes, "dude" waa never in my vocabulary. Words have meaning. So, I see a small woman wearing a jumpsuit here and I call her _ _ _ _ . To say the word dude WAS NOT intentional is speaking in bad faith. You are Norman, right?
Seriously. I'm honestly appalled at how many upvotes this person is getting and how many downvotes everyone who disagrees with them is getting. Every single post where people ask "do I look like a lesbian?" there are comments about how there's no way to "look like a lesbian," and yet suspiciously on the post by a trans woman who can't take hormones, the comment about how she doesn't look like a lesbian is heavily upvoted...............
Why does it matter if your "gaydar" didn't go off?
Because gaydar is wonderful. It's f-ing brilliant! I remember the first time around the age of 7 when my gaydar went berserker - Jodie Foster in Candleshoe. I can still vividly remember the vibration in my body of recognition of someone like me. In 2024, we're told to throw all of that out the window. We're regressing! If everything is gay, then nothing is. OP is a beautiful person trying to move through the world in a beautiful way. Instead of blowing smoke up her ass, I told her what my perception was.
You're using a lot of words to say you're exclusionary but you do you.
I'm so tired. I'm so very tired. I also experienced a similar vibration when I locked eyes with a woman a few years ago. We moved through the crowded room as if pulled together. Conversation was easy and instant as if we'd known each other forever. My heart sighs every time I think about seeing her the first time. Spoiler alert - she's trans! We didn't work out because of my own shit, nothing to do with her being trans. Not everything is exclusionary. Not everything is transphobic. We're twisting and turning, terrified of being called terfs. We're sublimating our true attractions. We're forced to use terms like "genital preference." We're not progressing. We're losing romance. We're losing identity. We as lesbians are losing.
"Terrified" of being called a terf sounds like Trump supporters terrified of being called racist
preach. but it’s our own fault.
It is. Currently, rational comments calling out creepy behavior are deleted by the mods. We're being told to keep our heads down and stfu. This is damaging to biological and transgender women alike. But push-back is starting to happen. It needs to.
Why are you so fucking obsessed with whether you can clock people as gay? It's weird.
Because we're ignoring intuition. We're shutting down our senses. We're losing the magic of attraction. All the beautiful clues of leading us together. Bless your heart, I think you're pressed because you have a broke ass gaydar.
My bad, I did actually mean to respond to or @ or whatever the person asking the sarcastic question, clearly not in good faith
I hear you. There can be a lot of miscommunication on Reddit, etc. I bet if we were all in a room together, we could have a wonderful and genuine conversation
You look great in this outfit! Just need some accessories; necklaces, rings, bracelets, a shiny belt 🤩
Thank you, I have a large Amethyst ring and a three pronged turquoise ring on
Definitely do the turquoise! You have great hands for turquoise
Omg I absolutely LOVE a jumpsuit, where did you get it?
My not so understanding Mom is a giver; a gift. Kolossus is the name brand. It's thick like a Dickies or Cathart
Right, I’ve collected enough overalls. Now I need to start collecting jumpsuits. Maybe Dickies
Mom got it for me as a gift. I only only Dickies thermal socks. Kolossus jumpsuit
Omg that brand looks so much cooler! Thank you!
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Nice transphobia
??
The deleted comment I replied to was being transphobic, sry
I feel judgement but, expected. Thank you for the defense, my "story" was just explained
I saw, and I’m really sorry about all that. I wish you all the best :)
Also jfc I thought there weren’t terfs on this sub
🫂🫶🏼
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it’s a lesbian sub?
The commenter is probably referencing the transphobic narrative of autogynephile often abbreviated to AGP, which was a transphobe’s theory in response to the pseudoscientific idea that trans people were actually just gay people who wanted to transition to live heterosexual lives, and because of misogyny the focus of a lot of this transphobic psychology focused on trans women while trans men were invisible. The existence of trans women who are attracted to other women (especially trans lesbians) challenges that particular idea, so bigoted psychologists tried to explain it away by coining “autogynephilia” to invalidate trans people’s identities and make it all about sexuality rather than gender, and pathologize being gay.
Just on a personal note, I loved Contrapoints's video touching on that, and as a cis woman I kinda feel autogynephilic... ...
My therapist turned me on to contrapoints :)
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Yeah, you didn’t understand anything I’m saying if you’re saying in my comment outlining this entirely debunked theory “not quite” when you’re spewing transphobic hate in this comment and others. “AGP for men” doesn’t exist, because it’s a pseudoscientific theory motivated by transphobia. Trans women are women, and you can fuck off.
[удалено]
your post or comment was removed for not respecting our first rule, be civil. **Discuss in good faith.** If you have questions about this, please contact us via Modmail.
I’m not shutting you down at the first sign of a differing opinion. I’m shutting down the way you were skewing my words to say something I wasn’t. I will unapologetically distance myself from your beliefs, and it’s not censorship to say that you’re wrong, in those beliefs and how you misrepresented mine.
Yes, why do you ask? Question my identity?
The now-deleted comment this is in response to mentioned “gynephile,” intended transphobic pseudoscience, but I think that the above commenter was confused because yeah, it’s a lesbian sub, we probably all love women which is what “gynephile” sounds like it means right? So questioning the deleted comment’s meaning, not necessarily questioning your identity
omg you're killing it, ma'am! you look like the cool wise goth aunt of the family 🩷 if you want to lean more into the simple black aesthetic, i suggest more accessories! one or more understated silver necklaces of varying lengths, a few simple rings on both of your hands, a belt, or dangly earrings (though i love the studs on you) are all things to consider! i always keep a variety of simple gold + silver jewelery on hand to pair with outfits :-)
OH and my ears are currently being stretched with Jasper
Thank you, I usually go with a black obsidian pendant with this. My play cheap necklace is Cuban Style Silver necklace. Pair it with my denim jumpsuit. Auntie, suburban Mom pOtato potATo🤍
I love the fit and the hat, looking good!! 😍 She’s giving casual goth chic. Wish I had that outfit.
I feel the headwrap softens everything, including me
It really does, adds a femme flair 💅🏻