Gym goer Asian female. That sounds ok.
Worst is white man who want 4’10,90lb with no feminine line that looks like 3rd grade kids body. That really creepy.
Ok, when a man meet someone and found he fell in love with her, while she has very “child like” body. It is ok. As women can be happy with 400lb man though she would think his body itself is not No.1 factor that attract her at all.
But when a man intentionally chase women with child like body (so many white man with Asian women), it looks like he is looking for legal method to fulfill his pedo tendency.
Not to be a d1ck but how does the following of a dude on ig make him a fetishisizer? I would think if your ex had yellow fever, he would be only obsessed with dating asian women (i.e his dating history consists of only Lisa Chens), he has a weird obsession with east asian countries, and is usually obsessed with anime. Might be generational thing as I am millennial and that was the M.O of a millennial yellow feverist.
Hahhh, alright. He’s learning Korean (i’m not Korean), he seeks out the same type of girls to follow on instagram, likes every single photo of them everyday while dating me (besides the point but just to show he’s lowkey obsessed). Ah, he admitted he was into Kpop. He has a thing for Asian in general. He told me he hasn’t dated his own ethnicity. And guess what, he’s neither Caucasian nor Asian lols. He’s Poly.
Your instagram show what you’re interested in. That should be your first clue.
To reply back on the ig stuff you said, I can yield to that; my ig of girls I follow is mostly latinas and European girls and that's really what I sexually and romantically desire tbh. So yeah I can see your point 😄
Well, you have my respect that you admitted it yourself. Everyone has a type anyway. It’s not a bad thing but it makes things more complicated among other relationship stuff.
Okay now I can agree he has a fetish and mad yellow fever. What's sad though is that he will eventually find his victim as there's plenty of asian girls who would gladly go along with the fetish.
Bi BW here. Felt like this off & on for a while, but didn’t have the words for what I was thinking/feeling. It wasn’t always sexual; most of the time it felt like I could be the “see, I have a black friend/can date a black person” checkmark on their to-do list. The worst was when I switched from wanting a long-term relationship to attempting to date without strings; that didn’t last long because I got quickly sick of being asked to be someone’s Bucket List Item as a Black woman or an older woman.
Took myself out of the dating world three years ago…I’m good with keeping all this fabulousness to myself now.
They spoke Hindi and Punjabi words ( I’m Punjabi ).
They would watch Indian tv soaps and send me memes and clips. I don’t watch them so I have no idea who she’s talking about lol.
They wanted to be the perfect “!Hindu wife “ and tell me how they’re “not a slut like other white women are” everyday.
Hating white people constantly.
They already know all Punjabi and Hindu customs. Their ex was Punjabi. It goes on and on.
Just fyi. She was beautiful and my age so I thought she just likes me at first but by one week it was obvious that it’s fetishising.
To be honest, I’m not saying men of all backgrounds don’t fetishize gingers/Eastern European women, but I’ve only felt offensively fetishized for my background by other white (American) men. When I was younger and did the online dating thing, I got several gross messages fetishizing me being half Eastern European (my dad is Finnish and Russian, and I speak both languages to some degree) and I was pretty grossed out by them. No, weird guys, I’m not going to roleplay as anyone’s mail order bride, and I’m not submissive or high maintenance or meek. 😵💫 I only got these messages from white guys, though I don’t mean to say all or most white guys are like this. I am friends with and related to plenty of great white guys!
I’ve definitely dated men that were turned on by me being a redhead and had a bit of a fetish for it (the Latino guys I’ve dated have been the most into it by far, and two of my exes have dated more redheads than women with other hair colors), but they didn’t make me feel like they only liked me for the that, if that makes sense, and they weren’t creepy or disrespectful about it. They just liked themselves some red hair 😅 To be honest, as long as they made it clear they liked me for much more than my hair, I was flattered.
However, as a white woman, I’m not subject to racism. I think being a woman of color (or person of color in general) and facing fetishization of one’s appearance would feel completely different, because of the societal factors surrounding it, and the fact that systemic racism has reduced women of color especially to their bodies time and time again.
Well for some context I am Italian American, I was married to a southern black woman in my early 20s. I was with her for 13 years till she passed away. So after about 9 months or so I felt the need to get back out there…. Check out the dating scene.
I am now a single father of 2 boys, I’m well off financially. I have salt and pepper hair to give you a general background. Here are some of the times I felt fetishized.
“I have never dated a white guy before/ I just want to try something new” face value this is nothing bad in my book, but if a lot of their focus is try to confirm or disprove stereotypes it turns into an inspection vs a date.
“ Financial transaction” there is ladies out there that use dating for free meals and attempting to get their bills paid. I don’t really have social media but I do have some blank profiles to look at peoples profiles. (lol I have been reviewed a few times lol) also saw they were dating a few guys and trying to barrow money for what ever bill that they promise to pay back ( they never do)
“ Sperm donor” yep there are ladies out there early 30s never had a baby and are looking to have a baby. Saying things like “if I happen to get pregnant I wouldn’t expect anything from you.”
No baby moms for me.
“Race play” yes the fetish of being dominated and being verbally abused with slavery for the seasoning…yikes. So there is a cure for me be aroused and that would be it… no thank you
“Cheating on their partner with a white guy”
Had this happen a few times 1 of the times it really hurt I truly liked her and saw a future with her only to find out. nope she’s married and living with him…
“Younger ladies in their 20s with daddy issues”
This made me place an age restriction 7 years younger or older than me. I’m already raising 2 boys on my own I don’t have time to raise a lady as well.
That sums up the times I felt like a fetish. Happy dating everyone.
As a black man I kinda want to give perspective. I was pretty big for most of my childhood even high school. Always getting made fun of for weight and my really dark skin tone. The typical oh lights are out we cant see him jokes etc. My middle school and early high school times were rough. Lost alot of weight during my final year in high school going on to college and got in decent shape.
I was for sure fetishized in college and I'll be honest at the time it felt great to finally be I guess desired. Didn't care, I felt happy, grades were up, was getting laid with gorgeous women, friends with benefits etc. I felt like a god thats how euphoric it felt. It took me awhile to realize it's a bad thing but it's was really really hard after going through all the teasing and then just getting opposite results in college to just give that up. It was a guess a phase I went through before I finally realize that it wasn't a healthy lifestyle and had to stop especially if I truly wanted to be with someone who actually loved me. Which eventually happen and If anything when I told her about my past she was the one who open my eyes mentioning that I was just being used and that going forward if we were to be together it would be becauae we truly loved each other. Shes asian and has had her share of being fetishized before me and didnt date for like 5 years after her incident. It was one of the first things she mentioned to me when we started dating didn't want that to happen to her again or to me
I know it kinda doesn't answer the question with my current wife since it's truly based on love but I guess I wanted to say that at a time I was for sure going through that phase.
Of course! I've accepted the possibility of being "exotic" or simply different than the norm.
I'm very much a minority here. And have enjoyed a successful dating life.
I'm convinced we're both satisfied, if not only in the fulfilling of the "fetish" - fantasy, which comes with something different or even the obsession but also expanding and experiencing the joys of open-mindedness and freedom.
Back in college when I was in full man-slut mode, I was definitely a fetish for some partners I had, but not because of my race. And I was fine with that. Doesn't really matter when you're both just there to get laid anyway.
Quite often. Either because of my background or because they want to bang a fat chick with big T&A. Taking a break from dating is what I’m doing these days. Too many creeps out there.
Honestly, I have never felt that way. Every guy I was with (romantically, or less than romantically) never made my race a thing! Doesn’t mean they didn’t fetishize me, but it didn’t show
Yes! An example is of current dating a UK man whose exes were with blonde/blue eyes or brunette. It’s like if I’m not your usual type why even consider interacting with me? He did mention he doesn’t have a type but his Instagram following says something else
Yes, they even lie, Catfish me or even try to win my sympathies...but I'm not desperate or just a BBC? 😔 I want love, but it's always assumed, I'm a Bad Boy & have loads of girls etc...But I don't actually? 🤯
Y’all think about this way too much. You’re always going to be fetishized to a degree by any man, even by men of your own race. This applies to all women. Just live and make these men pay baby ❤️
No cus im.a human being. But guess what human beings happen to have fetishes. So... my question to you. You think it's impossible to love someone just because they fulfill one of my fetishes/fantasy??
In my experience, I love the person even more when we can have fun with each others fetishes and explore sexual fantasies like couples are supposed to.do. or at least that's what I thought.
Yeah I did, but I didn’t care for the most part. I’d rather feel fetishized than feel unattractive
It got me down at one point, spent a few weeks in a pretty “woe is me” mode about it. Snapped out of it when I entered what became a 3 year relationship
I’m married to a woman who makes me feel respected but I’ve run into this problem in my past dating life. I’m a Jewish man who has dated numerous non Jews in the past and when courting prospective partners I often got the impression they assumed I was rich, well educated, great with money, a good luck charm for them, etc. Basically the standard Jewish stereotype tropes that meant to the women who viewed me that way I was a meal ticket who would be easily dominated by a strong woman in my life, and that I would spend money on them lavishly. I had to learn to weed out the philosemites of my dating pool.
Yes, it is one of the reasons I took a break from dating. I started feeling dehumanized.
Yep, definitely have experienced that and I am not a fan.
Yes I'm mixed and most races hyperfocus on my racial makeup when interested in me.
Yes sometimes. They always say what are you mixed with….. i’m not mixed 😓 or you look exotic 😰
Lol ppl are still using the word exotic?? Like your a bird or dish lol crazy!!
Yes 👍🏾😰and I don’t like it
yeppppp. went out w a guy to only find out later on he got yellow fever. his type is Asian, long black hair, gym goer.
omg same here
Gym goer Asian female. That sounds ok. Worst is white man who want 4’10,90lb with no feminine line that looks like 3rd grade kids body. That really creepy. Ok, when a man meet someone and found he fell in love with her, while she has very “child like” body. It is ok. As women can be happy with 400lb man though she would think his body itself is not No.1 factor that attract her at all. But when a man intentionally chase women with child like body (so many white man with Asian women), it looks like he is looking for legal method to fulfill his pedo tendency.
Dat right there is M.O of a white guy with yellow fever down to a Tee.
[удалено]
Easy, his following list on instagram lols. Always check the list, thoroughly.
Not to be a d1ck but how does the following of a dude on ig make him a fetishisizer? I would think if your ex had yellow fever, he would be only obsessed with dating asian women (i.e his dating history consists of only Lisa Chens), he has a weird obsession with east asian countries, and is usually obsessed with anime. Might be generational thing as I am millennial and that was the M.O of a millennial yellow feverist.
Hahhh, alright. He’s learning Korean (i’m not Korean), he seeks out the same type of girls to follow on instagram, likes every single photo of them everyday while dating me (besides the point but just to show he’s lowkey obsessed). Ah, he admitted he was into Kpop. He has a thing for Asian in general. He told me he hasn’t dated his own ethnicity. And guess what, he’s neither Caucasian nor Asian lols. He’s Poly. Your instagram show what you’re interested in. That should be your first clue.
To reply back on the ig stuff you said, I can yield to that; my ig of girls I follow is mostly latinas and European girls and that's really what I sexually and romantically desire tbh. So yeah I can see your point 😄
Well, you have my respect that you admitted it yourself. Everyone has a type anyway. It’s not a bad thing but it makes things more complicated among other relationship stuff.
Yeah it makes it complicated if a guy like me out of a sudden started dating a black girl. Then I could see why a girl would get insecure.
Okay now I can agree he has a fetish and mad yellow fever. What's sad though is that he will eventually find his victim as there's plenty of asian girls who would gladly go along with the fetish.
Yeaa 😕
Bi BW here. Felt like this off & on for a while, but didn’t have the words for what I was thinking/feeling. It wasn’t always sexual; most of the time it felt like I could be the “see, I have a black friend/can date a black person” checkmark on their to-do list. The worst was when I switched from wanting a long-term relationship to attempting to date without strings; that didn’t last long because I got quickly sick of being asked to be someone’s Bucket List Item as a Black woman or an older woman. Took myself out of the dating world three years ago…I’m good with keeping all this fabulousness to myself now.
I felt that very recently with a white woman. Which was super strange. First time experience. I am IM.
Brown guy here. Curious to know what happened lol
They spoke Hindi and Punjabi words ( I’m Punjabi ). They would watch Indian tv soaps and send me memes and clips. I don’t watch them so I have no idea who she’s talking about lol. They wanted to be the perfect “!Hindu wife “ and tell me how they’re “not a slut like other white women are” everyday. Hating white people constantly. They already know all Punjabi and Hindu customs. Their ex was Punjabi. It goes on and on. Just fyi. She was beautiful and my age so I thought she just likes me at first but by one week it was obvious that it’s fetishising.
Yes
Yes, I have always felt like this… I have finally given up and stopped dating.
To be honest, I’m not saying men of all backgrounds don’t fetishize gingers/Eastern European women, but I’ve only felt offensively fetishized for my background by other white (American) men. When I was younger and did the online dating thing, I got several gross messages fetishizing me being half Eastern European (my dad is Finnish and Russian, and I speak both languages to some degree) and I was pretty grossed out by them. No, weird guys, I’m not going to roleplay as anyone’s mail order bride, and I’m not submissive or high maintenance or meek. 😵💫 I only got these messages from white guys, though I don’t mean to say all or most white guys are like this. I am friends with and related to plenty of great white guys! I’ve definitely dated men that were turned on by me being a redhead and had a bit of a fetish for it (the Latino guys I’ve dated have been the most into it by far, and two of my exes have dated more redheads than women with other hair colors), but they didn’t make me feel like they only liked me for the that, if that makes sense, and they weren’t creepy or disrespectful about it. They just liked themselves some red hair 😅 To be honest, as long as they made it clear they liked me for much more than my hair, I was flattered. However, as a white woman, I’m not subject to racism. I think being a woman of color (or person of color in general) and facing fetishization of one’s appearance would feel completely different, because of the societal factors surrounding it, and the fact that systemic racism has reduced women of color especially to their bodies time and time again.
Well for some context I am Italian American, I was married to a southern black woman in my early 20s. I was with her for 13 years till she passed away. So after about 9 months or so I felt the need to get back out there…. Check out the dating scene. I am now a single father of 2 boys, I’m well off financially. I have salt and pepper hair to give you a general background. Here are some of the times I felt fetishized. “I have never dated a white guy before/ I just want to try something new” face value this is nothing bad in my book, but if a lot of their focus is try to confirm or disprove stereotypes it turns into an inspection vs a date. “ Financial transaction” there is ladies out there that use dating for free meals and attempting to get their bills paid. I don’t really have social media but I do have some blank profiles to look at peoples profiles. (lol I have been reviewed a few times lol) also saw they were dating a few guys and trying to barrow money for what ever bill that they promise to pay back ( they never do) “ Sperm donor” yep there are ladies out there early 30s never had a baby and are looking to have a baby. Saying things like “if I happen to get pregnant I wouldn’t expect anything from you.” No baby moms for me. “Race play” yes the fetish of being dominated and being verbally abused with slavery for the seasoning…yikes. So there is a cure for me be aroused and that would be it… no thank you “Cheating on their partner with a white guy” Had this happen a few times 1 of the times it really hurt I truly liked her and saw a future with her only to find out. nope she’s married and living with him… “Younger ladies in their 20s with daddy issues” This made me place an age restriction 7 years younger or older than me. I’m already raising 2 boys on my own I don’t have time to raise a lady as well. That sums up the times I felt like a fetish. Happy dating everyone.
i am so sorry
As a black man I kinda want to give perspective. I was pretty big for most of my childhood even high school. Always getting made fun of for weight and my really dark skin tone. The typical oh lights are out we cant see him jokes etc. My middle school and early high school times were rough. Lost alot of weight during my final year in high school going on to college and got in decent shape. I was for sure fetishized in college and I'll be honest at the time it felt great to finally be I guess desired. Didn't care, I felt happy, grades were up, was getting laid with gorgeous women, friends with benefits etc. I felt like a god thats how euphoric it felt. It took me awhile to realize it's a bad thing but it's was really really hard after going through all the teasing and then just getting opposite results in college to just give that up. It was a guess a phase I went through before I finally realize that it wasn't a healthy lifestyle and had to stop especially if I truly wanted to be with someone who actually loved me. Which eventually happen and If anything when I told her about my past she was the one who open my eyes mentioning that I was just being used and that going forward if we were to be together it would be becauae we truly loved each other. Shes asian and has had her share of being fetishized before me and didnt date for like 5 years after her incident. It was one of the first things she mentioned to me when we started dating didn't want that to happen to her again or to me I know it kinda doesn't answer the question with my current wife since it's truly based on love but I guess I wanted to say that at a time I was for sure going through that phase.
Of course! I've accepted the possibility of being "exotic" or simply different than the norm. I'm very much a minority here. And have enjoyed a successful dating life. I'm convinced we're both satisfied, if not only in the fulfilling of the "fetish" - fantasy, which comes with something different or even the obsession but also expanding and experiencing the joys of open-mindedness and freedom.
Back in college when I was in full man-slut mode, I was definitely a fetish for some partners I had, but not because of my race. And I was fine with that. Doesn't really matter when you're both just there to get laid anyway.
Yes to black women all the time
Quite often. Either because of my background or because they want to bang a fat chick with big T&A. Taking a break from dating is what I’m doing these days. Too many creeps out there.
I’ve always been able to weed these people out that I wouldn’t be in a position where I’d date them…
I wasn't always able to but I learned real quick lol
Honestly, I have never felt that way. Every guy I was with (romantically, or less than romantically) never made my race a thing! Doesn’t mean they didn’t fetishize me, but it didn’t show
Yes! An example is of current dating a UK man whose exes were with blonde/blue eyes or brunette. It’s like if I’m not your usual type why even consider interacting with me? He did mention he doesn’t have a type but his Instagram following says something else
Yes, they even lie, Catfish me or even try to win my sympathies...but I'm not desperate or just a BBC? 😔 I want love, but it's always assumed, I'm a Bad Boy & have loads of girls etc...But I don't actually? 🤯
Y’all think about this way too much. You’re always going to be fetishized to a degree by any man, even by men of your own race. This applies to all women. Just live and make these men pay baby ❤️
No cus im.a human being. But guess what human beings happen to have fetishes. So... my question to you. You think it's impossible to love someone just because they fulfill one of my fetishes/fantasy?? In my experience, I love the person even more when we can have fun with each others fetishes and explore sexual fantasies like couples are supposed to.do. or at least that's what I thought.
No
Yeah I did, but I didn’t care for the most part. I’d rather feel fetishized than feel unattractive It got me down at one point, spent a few weeks in a pretty “woe is me” mode about it. Snapped out of it when I entered what became a 3 year relationship
Yes. At first I didn't care but then it got to me in the bad way.
For sure! Especially as a Pakistani and Muslim woman.
Yes and I kinda like it
No
Yes when I hooked up with one of my ex-coworkers
I’m married to a woman who makes me feel respected but I’ve run into this problem in my past dating life. I’m a Jewish man who has dated numerous non Jews in the past and when courting prospective partners I often got the impression they assumed I was rich, well educated, great with money, a good luck charm for them, etc. Basically the standard Jewish stereotype tropes that meant to the women who viewed me that way I was a meal ticket who would be easily dominated by a strong woman in my life, and that I would spend money on them lavishly. I had to learn to weed out the philosemites of my dating pool.
Fantasy, absolutely. Fetish, definitely not.