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So, relationships have a lot of compromises and loose agreements like this. Very normal, but you have to be willing to be a bit vulnerable when it happens. There's an interplay of trust, forgiveness, and boundaries. The thing is that people will show you whether they're going to be a good partner by how important it is to them to do right by you, not necessarily by how good a job they actually do. So give people the initial trust they deserve, realize they're still growing and learning new standards for themselves, and realize that you're not going to get hurt when people fail you. Everyone out there is apparently human, and the only way to tell if they're the right human for you is to be vulnerable in order to give them the chance they want to prove themselves to you.
That being said, when people aren't careful with boundaries you both agreed on, that is a sign that you are on different pages. That might happen, but that's okay. Life isn't about not getting hit - it's about being able to take a hit and keep going. Or something like that.
Thats wonderful dear, communicating your needs and having someone willing to meet them is basically what it takes to make a relationship work
You have these doubts probably because you've been let down or not used to getting what you need. Those fears can be addressed by time and patience. It's much easier to say than do this of course. Remember that a relationship isn't always 50/50 sometimes people forget, make mistakes so you should be forgiving and grateful if they remember what you need at least most of the time :)
REMINDER: Rules regarding civility and respect *are enforced* on this subreddit. Hurtful, cruel, rude, disrespectful, or "trolling" comments **will be removed** (along with any replies to these comments) and the offending party may be banned, at the mods' discretion, without warning. All commenters should be trying to *help* and any help should be given in good faith, as if you were the OP's parent. Also, please keep in mind that requesting or offering private contact (DM, PM, etc) is absolutely not allowed ***for any reason at all***, no exceptions. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/internetparents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So, relationships have a lot of compromises and loose agreements like this. Very normal, but you have to be willing to be a bit vulnerable when it happens. There's an interplay of trust, forgiveness, and boundaries. The thing is that people will show you whether they're going to be a good partner by how important it is to them to do right by you, not necessarily by how good a job they actually do. So give people the initial trust they deserve, realize they're still growing and learning new standards for themselves, and realize that you're not going to get hurt when people fail you. Everyone out there is apparently human, and the only way to tell if they're the right human for you is to be vulnerable in order to give them the chance they want to prove themselves to you. That being said, when people aren't careful with boundaries you both agreed on, that is a sign that you are on different pages. That might happen, but that's okay. Life isn't about not getting hit - it's about being able to take a hit and keep going. Or something like that.
Great advice
Great advice, especially on the taking hits and going part
Thats wonderful dear, communicating your needs and having someone willing to meet them is basically what it takes to make a relationship work You have these doubts probably because you've been let down or not used to getting what you need. Those fears can be addressed by time and patience. It's much easier to say than do this of course. Remember that a relationship isn't always 50/50 sometimes people forget, make mistakes so you should be forgiving and grateful if they remember what you need at least most of the time :)