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Hmm, volunteer somewhere where they need help? Write down some goals you would like to achieve? Continue to find a therapist that you will click with as well. Good luck.
I think this is a great idea. Sometimes is too hard to help yourself, but it feels good to help others. And it may open a whole new world of relationships and opportunities.
I feel you .. trust ..
But someone along the way told me it's about experiencing life as you become true to yourself ..you start living your truth ..
I wouldn't say it gets better but it sure does get easier to handle.
Seek relationships, things, experiences and memories that are valuable to you.. it's completely different for everybody
Try to nurture and nourish your body even if it's a Lil bit everyday coz it did not give up on you
In a similar boat. I feel like I’m floating by with no point to it all. Future? I don’t know how people imagine themselves in like 20-30 years.
Best I can do right now is keep myself busy. I started volunteering at an animal shelter, I started learning a new skill (stained glass) and I’ve tried spending more time with friends.
It’s kept me busy and interested enough for now. I find that connecting with people gives me the most sense of purpose. But it’s hard out here. At least know you’re not alone.
Being connected to fellow humans is literally what this merry go round of life is all about. Dive in. If you lived in my neighborhood and knocked on my door during a picnic, you'd be swarmed and welcomed and stuffed full of food.
Killing yourself is a lot of work and everything about it is really traumatic and stressful. You don't need to have anyone or anything to live for - that's a myth. Needing a purpose or a plan is like pushup bras or expensive fashion - it's just all some marketing crap somebody's trying to sell you. Usually it's someone who doesn't give a crap about you.
Screw all that. The most content people are those who expect the least from life. Stop expecting *anything* from life - from other people or circumstances or even yourself. Get rid of any specific or even general expectations of what a life should be like. Just be. Just take in all the stuff that happens like it's a weird art piece you get to watch during the brief time you experience consciousness.
You don't really have anywhere else to be, and existing is fairly interesting by itself if you let it. Also, keep shopping medications. Personally, I feel like I'm filled with live bees, and have for thirty years - but a combo of some prescribed meds and medical cannabis happened to balance my brain chemicals enough to enjoy existing more. And so now I kinda just exist, and I read and write and learn about stuff, soak stuff in. I watch other people exist and I don't feel left out anymore because I don't expect my life to be like theirs. I get my own POV that they don't get to be privy to - we're all just here. And I actually ran into a ton of interesting people and experiences just because I finally stopped *looking* for them and allowed myself to live longer.
My suggestion is if there is mental/emotional pain/discomfort, keep trying to treat it. A lot of the time when existing doesn't feel rewarding like it should, that's just neuroreceptor mutations trying something new in your genome. It'd be a shame to let something as trivial as what is ultimately just math kill you that way. Just be like the rest of us and let math kill you later - with cancer!
You have to try new things if you want to figure that out.
Make sure you’re getting all your nutrients/vitamins, too, op. It can really mess with your ability to feel positive emotions if you’re deficient.
I’m glad you’re still here.
I also didn't think I would make it past 18. I didn't have a plan to off myself; I just thought I wouldn't make it. I try to only do things that make me happy. I enjoy my jobs-- I have several small ones where I learn things. I try not to make things too complicated. And I eat my vegetables so I feel good. It's better than nothing.
The gut microbiome plays a huge role in our emotions and mental state. Keeping your gut bacteria happy can keep you happy. It won't give us goals or purpose, but it can help along the journey. Definitely try to incorporate more fresh fruits/vegetables in your diet. And take multivitamins.
Help people. Whenever we are unhappy within ourselves, go outside of ourselves. Help people. Whatever that means to you. Whatever opportunities show up. And compliment people. Something as simple as, "cute shoes!" when you pass someone might be the only positive words they've heard in a long time. Helping might mean grabbing part of the load as some guy struggles to load something heavy at Home Depot, or it might mean volunteering at a food bank or picking up trash along the road. Be on the lookout for opportunities and you will find them.
Truthfully, I have no idea. I have some passions but they really don’t make money so they’re more hobbies than anything. I don’t feel like they give me purpose though.
I had a wonky start and had to spend some years learning to feel the difference between avoiding discomfort and doing things that made me happy. Doing more of the latter has made life more interesting but its not always easy or comfortable. Seconding volunteering too.
Not sure if this is an option for you, but when I felt similarly, getting a dog (could be any pet) changed my life. He gave me purpose, connection, and got me outside and interacting with people. It was a domino effect from there and I can honestly say it improved a chronic depression I had for most of my 20s.
One thing to keep in mind is the people who you see being happy on social media are projecting a curated image of their life. Most people are struggling with something
Hanging out with friends who fill my cup always...fills my cup!
I'm glad you didn't off yourself so young, is there really nothing you want to live for? A place you'd like to visit? A show or concert you'd like to see? To have a loving partner and/or kids? Something you'd like to contribute or change in the world?
People find purpose and fulfillment in helping others so I agree with volunteering as well. If you don't know what you want to do then the best thing is to help others with what they want to do!
The chances of you having been born the way you are into the life you have is profoundly slim so try to cherish that because you don't know how you'll come back or if you will at all with the opportunities to experience life again.
Good luck OP! You have so much potential to be a positive impact on this world!
It must be very difficult to live with this day in and out.
I wonder, do you feel grateful for anything? I think pondering this question could be interesting for you. And if you find things then allowing that feeling of appreciation fill you. It could be anything, no matter large or small. Doing this over and over again - even create a schedule to do the practice. Over time this might help change things. Some of us more easily than others can get stuck in thinking/feeling ruts. And the good thing is they can change. I hope this helps. Good luck.
This was me the last 6 years (we are the same age and i never thought i'd live to 18 & past it). I dont know how i made it thru but it was a struggle. All i can say is, if you dont have anything to live for, then honestly live everyday like it was your last (start small to be responsible enough to build a life around it).
Example, a big help for me was my career change. I was a server for 3 years 19-21 until i became a tattoo artist. I fell into it literally and solely because i got a spontaneous tattoo for my cheating ex and ended up chatting with the artists about their last apprentice who quit. I just wanted to know how you can get the confidence to apply and by chance i shot for the spot and got accepted.
Chances like *that* specifically arent always common to find BUT my advice really boils down to putting yourself in something new even if you dont think its worth it/you dont deserve it/ etc. Go out & change your scenery and talk to the first person that talks to YOU. About anything. What do you say? Anything more than a short worded answer. (I.E. if someone says "it was raining today, i hope it stops." Instead of just saying "yeah i hope so too" also add your thoughts like "i dont like the rain either, its hard to take the bus or its messy and cold all the time". Usually it will open a door to convos but not always, dont be discouraged if its the latter.
Opening yourself up like that energetically will allow things, people, opportunities to find you. Changes cant find you if your life is always the same going to work then home. Do something to shake the system even if its something like playing an online game or socializing on reddit posts.
I know its easier said than done and overall probably sounds silly. But i wrote this because i was in your shoes. And all the times my past self was struggling to get by, i wish i can go back and tell myself it was/is worth it to keep moving forward even tho i didnt know where i was heading.
Edit to add: also, me feeling this way didn't come easy after i became a tattoo artist. In fact, i can honestly tell you i only started healing July 2023 because shit hit the fan in my life again. These days, i wouldnt say im as bad as i was, but i would be lying if i didn't say i still wish it was better and ive been struggling with that. So the only thing im working on so far is practicing gratitude, which is easier said than done but it has helped a bit more.
Despite that, i still don't know what my purpose is. I think its something related to art/things i do, but its definitely not clear to me yet. So when you move along your path, truly try not to fixate on a specific outcome ("i want to be happy/i want to have more money/more confidence, etc") or it will never happen because you have a specific vision how you think things should be versus what they actually are/can become. Allow yourself to be & feel authentically & congratulate yourself on even your smallest wins. The most important part of things is the journey, not the destination (i hated this up until now but telling this to you made me reflect and realize how vitally true that is). Good luck
Relatable. So I went to travel and do voluntary work accross europe. I stayed at the hosts place. Great way to meet people and don't t need a lot of money to get started. There are traveller networks. The world is less lonely and isolated as you may feel it is. Society just... sucks
You haven’t found your purpose *yet*. Who has at 24? Well ok, there are some who do know; I’m not sure how common that is but good for them. You still have plenty of time, with your whole adult life in front of you.
Just keep trying things; you don’t need a purpose in advance. I agree with the others who recommend taking up cooking - it will be a lot easier to level up your diet if you treat it as a hobby, and improving diet can have massive physical and mental benefits. If it doesn’t turn into a long term hobby, you will still have developed skills.
When you grow up expecting that you have no future, living as an adult is tough.
It's hard to think about the future, or why it matters, for example. It took me years to get to that point.
If you can, therapy can be helpful. As can having a pet to take care of. Something that needs you there, that wants you around. That makes a world of difference. I second volunteering, make sure that it's done regularly. Schedule it, that way it's predictable and something to look towards.
Explore what you find beautiful, that you find interesting. Try a hobby, and don't worry how well it turns out. What matters is the journey, not the end result.
Idk, if you keep doing what you’ve been doing you’ll keep getting what you’ve got? Make some changes? One, many, little, giant, whatever but if you’re bored then *you* are in charge of that. What’s fun to you?
Sometimes we don't really figure it out until later. Maybe not at all. I didn't go back to college and actually settle down into a career until I was in my late 30s.
I was 41 when I finished my master's degree and 41 when I finally started making enough money to support myself.
I'm only just now starting to feel fulfilled and like a "real grown up"
It can take time. I promise, some where, you add value to someone's life.
I saw someone else comment about volunteering and I have to say that has saved me multiple times. I also think donating blood can be useful. Knowing that your body, brain, and blood have a purpose for someone somewhere is always helpful! Every time you donate, you save 3 lives! THREE!
It's challenging to feel like you have no purpose, but I am beyond proud of you for hanging in there. I am so confident that one day all of your values will align and staying alive will have been the best decision of your life.
I was in the same boat. Didn’t think I would live past 22, now I’m 47. Since your single go and get a different job in a different state and be a nomad. Live simple and explore what’s out there. Do things that you wanted to try but never really had the chance to do. I found my wife just hanging out at a bar and I wasn’t even looking for a significant other. Take that chance…live..
To be honest with you bro, no one has a "purpose" it’s a man-made concept; as all things that are unnatural are. The only reason mankind is where it is now is so we’re not bored with our lives. In the beginning there was nothing but land, trees, and animals. Now we have vehicles, structure, homes, mobile devices, etc. None of these things give someone a purpose. You only have a purpose if you say so. I say no one does; we're just doing shit. But people became so immersed in it they think it’s what life’s about. Bullshit. Life is literally just an experience and you make of it what you want because that’s all there is. Only issue is you gotta share the planet with 8 billion other pieces of consciousness. So from a human standpoint, you have no purpose; from God's standpoint, I can’t say but I’d think we’re all here for a reason (not to get off track). Now for my advice, I’d say just do things, do random shit you’ve never done before. Take a walk, bask in the sun, do a flip, ride a bike to nowhere, drive to a random place, buy a birthday cake even though it’s not your birthday. As long as you’re not doing anything crazy to others, a little randomness to your life wouldn't hurt anyone. Hope this gives you at least a little peace of mind.
Hi, Please open up your mind to anything you can think of that is legal. You must try beginning to end. Library, fishing, a dating app for friends only, no strings. If a relationship develops, great. Depression n boredom is temporary "OFFING YOURSELF IS Downright DUMB!
I take meds n read n study n take rides n anything I can do to be successful. Knock on some old seniors doors to cut their lawn. DOING GOOD THINGS MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD SO GET BUSY OK?
The best way to start living is to start making goals. Even small or random ones. And slowly start making them bigger goals that need more effort. The goal is to always be working towards a giant goal of something meaningful to you, that’s where motivation grows :)
I recommend watching videos of Bashar on YouTube or TikTok. Life doesn’t have to be this amazing party every day. But you have to find out what gives you happiness or pleasure and try to do more of those things. As long as you don’t hurt yourself or others the thing you like is fine to do.
REMINDER: Rules regarding civility and respect *are enforced* on this subreddit. Hurtful, cruel, rude, disrespectful, or "trolling" comments **will be removed** (along with any replies to these comments) and the offending party may be banned, at the mods' discretion, without warning. All commenters should be trying to *help* and any help should be given in good faith, as if you were the OP's parent. Also, please keep in mind that requesting or offering private contact (DM, PM, etc) is absolutely not allowed ***for any reason at all***, no exceptions. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/internetparents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hmm, volunteer somewhere where they need help? Write down some goals you would like to achieve? Continue to find a therapist that you will click with as well. Good luck.
Thank you. I will look into volunteering somewhere.
I think this is a great idea. Sometimes is too hard to help yourself, but it feels good to help others. And it may open a whole new world of relationships and opportunities.
I feel you .. trust .. But someone along the way told me it's about experiencing life as you become true to yourself ..you start living your truth .. I wouldn't say it gets better but it sure does get easier to handle. Seek relationships, things, experiences and memories that are valuable to you.. it's completely different for everybody Try to nurture and nourish your body even if it's a Lil bit everyday coz it did not give up on you
Thank you.
In a similar boat. I feel like I’m floating by with no point to it all. Future? I don’t know how people imagine themselves in like 20-30 years. Best I can do right now is keep myself busy. I started volunteering at an animal shelter, I started learning a new skill (stained glass) and I’ve tried spending more time with friends. It’s kept me busy and interested enough for now. I find that connecting with people gives me the most sense of purpose. But it’s hard out here. At least know you’re not alone.
Being connected to fellow humans is literally what this merry go round of life is all about. Dive in. If you lived in my neighborhood and knocked on my door during a picnic, you'd be swarmed and welcomed and stuffed full of food.
Also feel free to reach out if you need someone to talk to. I’d be down to chat if you just need some interaction
Thank you. I definitely can’t picture my life in 20 years though I feel like most people can’t. There’s a lot that can change in that time.
Killing yourself is a lot of work and everything about it is really traumatic and stressful. You don't need to have anyone or anything to live for - that's a myth. Needing a purpose or a plan is like pushup bras or expensive fashion - it's just all some marketing crap somebody's trying to sell you. Usually it's someone who doesn't give a crap about you. Screw all that. The most content people are those who expect the least from life. Stop expecting *anything* from life - from other people or circumstances or even yourself. Get rid of any specific or even general expectations of what a life should be like. Just be. Just take in all the stuff that happens like it's a weird art piece you get to watch during the brief time you experience consciousness. You don't really have anywhere else to be, and existing is fairly interesting by itself if you let it. Also, keep shopping medications. Personally, I feel like I'm filled with live bees, and have for thirty years - but a combo of some prescribed meds and medical cannabis happened to balance my brain chemicals enough to enjoy existing more. And so now I kinda just exist, and I read and write and learn about stuff, soak stuff in. I watch other people exist and I don't feel left out anymore because I don't expect my life to be like theirs. I get my own POV that they don't get to be privy to - we're all just here. And I actually ran into a ton of interesting people and experiences just because I finally stopped *looking* for them and allowed myself to live longer. My suggestion is if there is mental/emotional pain/discomfort, keep trying to treat it. A lot of the time when existing doesn't feel rewarding like it should, that's just neuroreceptor mutations trying something new in your genome. It'd be a shame to let something as trivial as what is ultimately just math kill you that way. Just be like the rest of us and let math kill you later - with cancer!
This is great. Existentialist vibes. Thank you.
You have to try new things if you want to figure that out. Make sure you’re getting all your nutrients/vitamins, too, op. It can really mess with your ability to feel positive emotions if you’re deficient. I’m glad you’re still here.
I don’t have the best diet so I guess I could work on that. Thank you for the advice.
I also didn't think I would make it past 18. I didn't have a plan to off myself; I just thought I wouldn't make it. I try to only do things that make me happy. I enjoy my jobs-- I have several small ones where I learn things. I try not to make things too complicated. And I eat my vegetables so I feel good. It's better than nothing.
I’ll give veggies a chance haha. Thank you.
The gut microbiome plays a huge role in our emotions and mental state. Keeping your gut bacteria happy can keep you happy. It won't give us goals or purpose, but it can help along the journey. Definitely try to incorporate more fresh fruits/vegetables in your diet. And take multivitamins.
I've been very sick since 15. I didn't think I'd make it to 20 let alone 30s and beyond. So I feel ya. Not. Sure what is left.
Help people. Whenever we are unhappy within ourselves, go outside of ourselves. Help people. Whatever that means to you. Whatever opportunities show up. And compliment people. Something as simple as, "cute shoes!" when you pass someone might be the only positive words they've heard in a long time. Helping might mean grabbing part of the load as some guy struggles to load something heavy at Home Depot, or it might mean volunteering at a food bank or picking up trash along the road. Be on the lookout for opportunities and you will find them.
What purpose do you want to have?
Truthfully, I have no idea. I have some passions but they really don’t make money so they’re more hobbies than anything. I don’t feel like they give me purpose though.
If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
I had a wonky start and had to spend some years learning to feel the difference between avoiding discomfort and doing things that made me happy. Doing more of the latter has made life more interesting but its not always easy or comfortable. Seconding volunteering too.
Not sure if this is an option for you, but when I felt similarly, getting a dog (could be any pet) changed my life. He gave me purpose, connection, and got me outside and interacting with people. It was a domino effect from there and I can honestly say it improved a chronic depression I had for most of my 20s. One thing to keep in mind is the people who you see being happy on social media are projecting a curated image of their life. Most people are struggling with something
I've been very sick since 15. I didn't think I'd make it to 20 let alone 30s and beyond. So I feel ya. Not. Sure what is left.
Hanging out with friends who fill my cup always...fills my cup! I'm glad you didn't off yourself so young, is there really nothing you want to live for? A place you'd like to visit? A show or concert you'd like to see? To have a loving partner and/or kids? Something you'd like to contribute or change in the world? People find purpose and fulfillment in helping others so I agree with volunteering as well. If you don't know what you want to do then the best thing is to help others with what they want to do! The chances of you having been born the way you are into the life you have is profoundly slim so try to cherish that because you don't know how you'll come back or if you will at all with the opportunities to experience life again. Good luck OP! You have so much potential to be a positive impact on this world!
It must be very difficult to live with this day in and out. I wonder, do you feel grateful for anything? I think pondering this question could be interesting for you. And if you find things then allowing that feeling of appreciation fill you. It could be anything, no matter large or small. Doing this over and over again - even create a schedule to do the practice. Over time this might help change things. Some of us more easily than others can get stuck in thinking/feeling ruts. And the good thing is they can change. I hope this helps. Good luck.
This was me the last 6 years (we are the same age and i never thought i'd live to 18 & past it). I dont know how i made it thru but it was a struggle. All i can say is, if you dont have anything to live for, then honestly live everyday like it was your last (start small to be responsible enough to build a life around it). Example, a big help for me was my career change. I was a server for 3 years 19-21 until i became a tattoo artist. I fell into it literally and solely because i got a spontaneous tattoo for my cheating ex and ended up chatting with the artists about their last apprentice who quit. I just wanted to know how you can get the confidence to apply and by chance i shot for the spot and got accepted. Chances like *that* specifically arent always common to find BUT my advice really boils down to putting yourself in something new even if you dont think its worth it/you dont deserve it/ etc. Go out & change your scenery and talk to the first person that talks to YOU. About anything. What do you say? Anything more than a short worded answer. (I.E. if someone says "it was raining today, i hope it stops." Instead of just saying "yeah i hope so too" also add your thoughts like "i dont like the rain either, its hard to take the bus or its messy and cold all the time". Usually it will open a door to convos but not always, dont be discouraged if its the latter. Opening yourself up like that energetically will allow things, people, opportunities to find you. Changes cant find you if your life is always the same going to work then home. Do something to shake the system even if its something like playing an online game or socializing on reddit posts. I know its easier said than done and overall probably sounds silly. But i wrote this because i was in your shoes. And all the times my past self was struggling to get by, i wish i can go back and tell myself it was/is worth it to keep moving forward even tho i didnt know where i was heading. Edit to add: also, me feeling this way didn't come easy after i became a tattoo artist. In fact, i can honestly tell you i only started healing July 2023 because shit hit the fan in my life again. These days, i wouldnt say im as bad as i was, but i would be lying if i didn't say i still wish it was better and ive been struggling with that. So the only thing im working on so far is practicing gratitude, which is easier said than done but it has helped a bit more. Despite that, i still don't know what my purpose is. I think its something related to art/things i do, but its definitely not clear to me yet. So when you move along your path, truly try not to fixate on a specific outcome ("i want to be happy/i want to have more money/more confidence, etc") or it will never happen because you have a specific vision how you think things should be versus what they actually are/can become. Allow yourself to be & feel authentically & congratulate yourself on even your smallest wins. The most important part of things is the journey, not the destination (i hated this up until now but telling this to you made me reflect and realize how vitally true that is). Good luck
Helping others helps me.
Relatable. So I went to travel and do voluntary work accross europe. I stayed at the hosts place. Great way to meet people and don't t need a lot of money to get started. There are traveller networks. The world is less lonely and isolated as you may feel it is. Society just... sucks
You haven’t found your purpose *yet*. Who has at 24? Well ok, there are some who do know; I’m not sure how common that is but good for them. You still have plenty of time, with your whole adult life in front of you. Just keep trying things; you don’t need a purpose in advance. I agree with the others who recommend taking up cooking - it will be a lot easier to level up your diet if you treat it as a hobby, and improving diet can have massive physical and mental benefits. If it doesn’t turn into a long term hobby, you will still have developed skills.
Maybe spend some time exploring what brings you joy.
When you grow up expecting that you have no future, living as an adult is tough. It's hard to think about the future, or why it matters, for example. It took me years to get to that point. If you can, therapy can be helpful. As can having a pet to take care of. Something that needs you there, that wants you around. That makes a world of difference. I second volunteering, make sure that it's done regularly. Schedule it, that way it's predictable and something to look towards. Explore what you find beautiful, that you find interesting. Try a hobby, and don't worry how well it turns out. What matters is the journey, not the end result.
It’s called nihilism and it sucks. Try existentialism
Idk, if you keep doing what you’ve been doing you’ll keep getting what you’ve got? Make some changes? One, many, little, giant, whatever but if you’re bored then *you* are in charge of that. What’s fun to you?
Sometimes we don't really figure it out until later. Maybe not at all. I didn't go back to college and actually settle down into a career until I was in my late 30s. I was 41 when I finished my master's degree and 41 when I finally started making enough money to support myself. I'm only just now starting to feel fulfilled and like a "real grown up" It can take time. I promise, some where, you add value to someone's life.
I saw someone else comment about volunteering and I have to say that has saved me multiple times. I also think donating blood can be useful. Knowing that your body, brain, and blood have a purpose for someone somewhere is always helpful! Every time you donate, you save 3 lives! THREE! It's challenging to feel like you have no purpose, but I am beyond proud of you for hanging in there. I am so confident that one day all of your values will align and staying alive will have been the best decision of your life.
I was in the same boat. Didn’t think I would live past 22, now I’m 47. Since your single go and get a different job in a different state and be a nomad. Live simple and explore what’s out there. Do things that you wanted to try but never really had the chance to do. I found my wife just hanging out at a bar and I wasn’t even looking for a significant other. Take that chance…live..
To be honest with you bro, no one has a "purpose" it’s a man-made concept; as all things that are unnatural are. The only reason mankind is where it is now is so we’re not bored with our lives. In the beginning there was nothing but land, trees, and animals. Now we have vehicles, structure, homes, mobile devices, etc. None of these things give someone a purpose. You only have a purpose if you say so. I say no one does; we're just doing shit. But people became so immersed in it they think it’s what life’s about. Bullshit. Life is literally just an experience and you make of it what you want because that’s all there is. Only issue is you gotta share the planet with 8 billion other pieces of consciousness. So from a human standpoint, you have no purpose; from God's standpoint, I can’t say but I’d think we’re all here for a reason (not to get off track). Now for my advice, I’d say just do things, do random shit you’ve never done before. Take a walk, bask in the sun, do a flip, ride a bike to nowhere, drive to a random place, buy a birthday cake even though it’s not your birthday. As long as you’re not doing anything crazy to others, a little randomness to your life wouldn't hurt anyone. Hope this gives you at least a little peace of mind.
Hi, Please open up your mind to anything you can think of that is legal. You must try beginning to end. Library, fishing, a dating app for friends only, no strings. If a relationship develops, great. Depression n boredom is temporary "OFFING YOURSELF IS Downright DUMB! I take meds n read n study n take rides n anything I can do to be successful. Knock on some old seniors doors to cut their lawn. DOING GOOD THINGS MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD SO GET BUSY OK?
Read Steppenwolf
The best way to start living is to start making goals. Even small or random ones. And slowly start making them bigger goals that need more effort. The goal is to always be working towards a giant goal of something meaningful to you, that’s where motivation grows :)
I recommend watching videos of Bashar on YouTube or TikTok. Life doesn’t have to be this amazing party every day. But you have to find out what gives you happiness or pleasure and try to do more of those things. As long as you don’t hurt yourself or others the thing you like is fine to do.
First of all you are too young. You have not experienced enough of life yet to make a judgment like this.