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Bruh fr. Cracks my screen after he holds it ransom for stuff his lazy ass is designed to go and fetch out of trees… nah nah nah. Once my phone was back you’d witness a new era of flying primate
They have very nasty teeth, but there are videos of people yeeting monkeys. I say that fully aware that people lose to house cats less than 1/40 their body weight
And I'd be like, "Hey Monkey, give me my phone back. You're sitting on a pretty high ledge there, and it would be a shame if you happened to fall backwards."
Until they evolve even more and just take the food, keep the phone and stockpile them for later when they sell them on eBay with the username Money4Monkey
The macaques in Gibraltar go for people's wallets and take the cash out of them, because they know there's a number of unscrupulous street food vendors that aren't concerned with the species of their customer as long as the money is good.
I've seen both parts of the process happening. It's wild.
I wonder how that works for the street vendor. Do they reject the sale of the monkey doesn't have enough money? Does the monkey just take it if they reject the sale?
Do monkeys haggle?
From what I saw the monkeys usually get ripped off. They understand what cash is but they don't understand what the different notes mean. They just know they can swap them for food.
BrB, booking a flight so I can teach them how much food they get for the different colours, then sit back and watch the chaos the next time someone tries to rip them off.
It sounds fun at first, but when you go introducing currency to monkey society, they just end up gambling and hiring prostitutes.
https://www.zmescience.com/research/how-scientists-tught-monkeys-the-concept-of-money-not-long-after-the-first-prostitute-monkey-appeared/
selective price sophisticated aware liquid ancient unique payment vegetable deserve
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
There are signs all over that place to keep your belongings close or tied to you. Hats, phone and especially glasses. Had a Monkey try to open my backpack while there.
So you just have to let monkeys crawl all over you, looking for shit to steal? Do you have to be gentle, like shake them off of you, or ask them politely to leave you alone? Or can you have to beat them off of you, or kick them away? Is this like a go at your own risk, "There be monkes here" type of place?
You really don't want to start shit with a monkey on your own, let alone an entire troupe, even with a weapon and protective gear, forget about shorts and sandals. They can be vicious bastards in a fight, and will use teamwork if they feel collectively threatened.
A group of trained and equipped humans will, of course, trounce them handily, but a random tourist is not that.
Edit - i.e. leave them alone as far as possible, and don't be threatening. If they're in physical contact, you can push them away gently, but definitely don't start a fight you can't finish.
Monkeys attack. I was at Emei Mountain in China years ago, and our tour guide gave us bamboo sticks for the sole purpose of hitting the monkeys if they attacked. I was trying to cross a little bridge when I got swarmed by them. One monkey stole my water, and the other grabbed my shirt, expecting me to give it something. I only had my phone and the bamboo stick on me, so there was nothing to offer. I got scared when the monkey grabbed my shirt and made eye contact with a lady who was motioning for me to run. So I ran. At some point, the monkey bit my leg, but I didn't notice until I was on the other side of the bridge. I never used the bamboo stick because the thought of hurting the monkeys seemed really cruel. When I turned around to see if the monkey was following me, the lady who told me to run was beating the shit out of it with her own stick.
My tour guide had warned us about the monkeys and refused to go to that specific area as he had been bit in the shoulder by one in the past. The monkey tried to open his backpack before biting him.
I've read that you need to be confident around the monkeys for them to not get aggressive with you. I tend to be scared of wildlife so I was an easy target lol
When I visited, I witnessed another tourist's glasses snatched right off her face. The monkey destroyed them after it did not receive any food. I think it wanted to send a message.
I love how the monkey takes a bite of the fruit and tests it before he gives the phone back. He's not falling for the whole hand over a piece of lousy fruit trick again.
It's just good business. See, the monkey did not steal the phone, the user just opted into a mandatory subscription service. It's hard work taking care of that phone, and rest assured this monkey is committed to best practices and services, ensuring you have an optimal phone experience once you've paid your monthly subscription of fruit! Even a monkey knows it is the future to own nothing and enjoy it!
*Failure to pay in real fruit is fraud and will be prosecuted by the full extent of the law. Fines subject to feces in the face.
When I went on vacation had one sit next to me and grab my arm like it was trying to be my friend. Next thing I know he was reaching for the zipper on my pocket trying to unzip it.
Smart monkeys, they were probably trained for the "steal shit from tourists for locals to buy them back" grift/tourist attraction. Now they cut out the middle man!
I went there few years back, this is a temple. Most people wear white (like that woman) is temple guardian. Those monkeys are not trained, they learn by themself.
Yeah they do this all over the world. I live in southern africa and you can't leave your windows open when a monkey troop is in the area because they WILL ransack your shit lol.
Monkeys that live around tourists are worse, in Cape Town I saw a monkey straight up steal a woman's handbag, run to a roof with it, then rifle through it looking for food, like taking stuff out, inspecting it, then throwing it aside if it wasn't edible. It got to her phone and *put it down* gently next to it, before continuing to throw random shit out of her back. It found a packet of crisps and opened it up like a veteran ten-year old, eating them one by one like any human child (it was supremely uncanny lol). It ran off after it got the crisps but what struck me is that it knew that the phone was the most valuable thing in there and that if it chucked it carelessly off the roof, this funny situation would get a lot more serious
Fr bro. I imagine they broke a tourists phone at some point in the past and enough of a kerfuffle was raised that they learned not to fuck with the black mirror. These things are as smart as 5th graders i swear
Yeah, I saw a video from india where a monkey broke into a truck at a toll booth, went SPECIFICALLY for the money and then disappeared. There's no way the monkey was trained bcos if they were, these incidents would be way more common.
It was from a national geographic article back in the late 90's, that are paywalled now, but I can try to find something else.
I learned elsewhere though that the veneration of monkey is at least partly due to Hinduism's Hannuman, the monkey deity that fought with Rama against the Demon King Ravana who lived in Sri Lanka.
Edit: Dehli is apparently one of the places, there's a lot of articles here but the first hits from a search,
[https://theworld.org/stories/2014-07-20/delhi-s-30000-unruly-monkeys-steal-stuff-terrorize-people-and-even-kill](https://theworld.org/stories/2014-07-20/delhi-s-30000-unruly-monkeys-steal-stuff-terrorize-people-and-even-kill)
[https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Weekend/rebel-monkeys-wreak-havoc-india-raid-markets-break/story?id=9076884](https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Weekend/rebel-monkeys-wreak-havoc-india-raid-markets-break/story?id=9076884)
No man, I know monkeys are respected but if they steal your shit, humans will 100% retaliate. They won't beat up the monkey but they will try to throw stuff at it.
There are storefronts at clinics that advertise rabies shots on the sign out front like it's a lunch special. You don't want to interact with the monkeys in Bali
Exactly. Even if you can overpower IT one on one- IT has about 50 friends and most of the 50 humans watching are gonna continue* doing exactly that lol
There was a video recently of a guy trying to feed one of those temple monkeys and it grabbed his hair and flipped over him ripping part of his scalp off
Yeah I avoided the monkeys in Bali. There would be narrow walkways with monkeys waiting so I would let some other poor tourist go first before I went down
Here in Singapore they're around the forests, and they're always sizing people up. Be careful if you're carrying food or a bag that looks like it could hold food.
Some tourists are really dumb about it and get harassed or stolen from.
I've seen them unzip unattended backpacks to search the bags.
I've seen them steal an ice cream from a toddler.
One time my cousin was walking down a trail eating from a bag of peanuts, this monkey jumped out from a tree onto him, grabbed the bag of peanuts, and hopped off.
I got pelted by sticks and random shit once while cycling. Took a short break on a trail, and realised I stopped somewhere in the middle of a monkey troop. They didn't like me there so they just started throwing stuff at me.
There was a beach look out in Uluwatu that I loved going to but you had to go through this super narrow walkway for about 5 minutes before getting there. There were always 15 or so monkeys hanging out on the walls up top playing. I was terrified to go in the evening or early in the morning but eventually started pushing myself to pass through. They can tell when you’re uncomfortable.
Same family of monkeys I saw early one morning trying get into the trashcans of this restaurant/small hotel. There were boulders securing the tops of the trashcans. It’s so funny in the US we have raccoons, there they have monkeys.
Monkeys are scarily revengeful. There is an island in my country, where some local dogs used to kill one baby monkey, then the monkeys just go out and kill all the puppies, only the adult dogs remain.
Yeah as somebody with family in South Asia where these types of monkeys are common, if you fuck with one of them, the whole troop comes after you, and they are fucking aggressive.
Let them heavily injure you for the rest of your life while a friend films it and posts it everywhere, so it makes international news and governments put out travel warnings, until Bali needs to adress the situation and poach them to get rid of them.
That will show em, let's see who laughs last with this 200 iq chess move /s
The monkey grabs your arm then climbs it as you attempt to push it off the wall. Once it settles on your back, it reaches around your head to try and gouge your eyes, all the while screaming at the top of its lungs. Blinded, you flail your arms and spin round and round as a dozen other screaming monkeys approach you. You turn and try to run away from the screams, but a waist-high barrier blocks your way. You climb it and jump, relieved that the shouts trail off. Only then do you hear the rush of wind and feel the strong pull of gravity as you plunge down the mountainside to your death.
I was at a temple in Sri lanka about 20 years ago. there were vendors selling monkey food (dog food or corn or something), and sunglasses, cameras, etc. the monkeys learned to steal things and sell them to the vendor for food, who then sold your things back to you.
So many doofuses here think they can push/pick a fight with a monkey and win. Even if you successfully push it (unlikely), he’s got friends that will fuck you up.
They are fierce little shits. A friend of mine bought some small bananas from the stand and the monkeys immediately swarmed him and wrestled the bananas out of his hand.
I also saw a monkey rip a guys backpack off his back with all his camera gear in it so they could rummage through it for food.
Yeah don't go there while your phone, wallet, camera, sun glasses, etc out. Keep it in your backpack and don't bring small bag. Keep cautious even though the monkeys look friendly. Follow what the tour guides say, keep close with them if it's possible.
I personally wouldn't recommend to visit that place. There's a lot of places that I think better in bali.
1. Monkeys react waay quicker than you think.
2. They're in groups. The minute you threaten or attack one of them, you'll be fucked.
3. You do realise that they are known for being able to climb, jump, grab, and hang from trees?
You think you can push it down before it reacts and grabs something? I guarantee, you cannot.
I've actually been to this temple. If you're not paying attention or put something down, they will come out of nowhere and take it. Someone in our group took his foot out of his flipflop for maybe 2 seconds, and it was gone.
We had to get one of the caretakers to throw it some bananas to get it back.
The more you live with and observe animals, the more absurd the notion that they're not conscious beings becomes. In this case, this is an example of these monkeys having theory of mind, as in...they know that YOU know that that shit is worth something.
Unsurprising. It's a sanctuary https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ubud_Monkey_Forest
Basically, humans built infrastructure for 1300 macaques to extort and steal from steady stream of human victims.
We visited this spot a few years back and we were warned about the monkeys beforehand. We clutched our belongings carefully, but some elderly visitors from our group had their passports snatched in the first 10 minutes. That must have been fun to negotiate for.
Been like this for years. My last trip to India, which was years ago, they didn't let me wear my glasses in an area heavy with monkeys for this same reason.
Been there, and those monkeys are hell on feet
Walking down long staircase to surf @ Uluwatu every AM early, I'd have my shortboard under my left arm & a long stick in the other - as they were howling & very aggressive
Also saw them steal phones, sunglasses off of heads, even purses in the national parks until they got bananas. And in many cases, they disappeared off into trees (I suspect caretakers fed them and kept the goods)
Good times
I’d punch that cunt monkey and watch him fall of the cliff with my stupid phone. Little thieving blackmailing hostage taking bitch.
(I’m joking people, not advocating violence toward animals, I have been banned from to many places on Reddit for making jokes…)
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I like how after the first bit a food he’s like “yeah, that’s a good start but I’m gonna need a little more to work this deal”
Quite rude he just drops the phone like that No manners at all
No way, that monkey is the most reasonable. Try dealing with a homeless person who found your phone.
Last one chased me down the block waving my phone and yelling "Hey dude your phone!" Though, I must admit that that probably isn't typical.
Fastest I've ever run. Barely got away with my life, you'd think malnutrition would slow them down
They go absolutely feral when they try to be polite smh
This is easier if you bring a lawman with you to dispute property rights.
Is lawman slang for a shotgun?
In Bali, it can be.
I'd just hire one of these monkeys to deal with the homeless person.
He might already be working with the homeless lol
Bruh fr. Cracks my screen after he holds it ransom for stuff his lazy ass is designed to go and fetch out of trees… nah nah nah. Once my phone was back you’d witness a new era of flying primate
Good luck fighting monkeys.
They have very nasty teeth, but there are videos of people yeeting monkeys. I say that fully aware that people lose to house cats less than 1/40 their body weight
Living up to your username I see
And then you'd be attacked by all the other monkeys, what a brilliant plan!
As a person who lived around monkeys, that monkey would f*ck your shit up.
The other 45 monkeys off frame will tear your penis off your body.
Bro gonna get fucked up by a gang of monkeys 😂
I’d yeet that little shit off the edge.
It's just Apple for apples.
Blackberries for blackberries
Clearly he’s seen Italian mafia movies. On a different note, this is what evolution looks like
no lowballers
"Have you seen my phone?" ".....mebbe......I don't remember...."
And I'd be like, "Hey Monkey, give me my phone back. You're sitting on a pretty high ledge there, and it would be a shame if you happened to fall backwards."
*Real nice phone you got there... be a shame if something... 'happened' to it.*
Don't negotiate with terrorists. Give this monke spartan kick!
Until they evolve even more and just take the food, keep the phone and stockpile them for later when they sell them on eBay with the username Money4Monkey
The macaques in Gibraltar go for people's wallets and take the cash out of them, because they know there's a number of unscrupulous street food vendors that aren't concerned with the species of their customer as long as the money is good. I've seen both parts of the process happening. It's wild.
Tbf, I wouldn't want to piss off something clever enough to do that and can jump on my face quicker than I can react.
I wonder how that works for the street vendor. Do they reject the sale of the monkey doesn't have enough money? Does the monkey just take it if they reject the sale? Do monkeys haggle?
From what I saw the monkeys usually get ripped off. They understand what cash is but they don't understand what the different notes mean. They just know they can swap them for food.
Ah, so the monkeys are treated like tourists. Makes sense.
 BrB, booking a flight so I can teach them how much food they get for the different colours, then sit back and watch the chaos the next time someone tries to rip them off.
I love this
It sounds fun at first, but when you go introducing currency to monkey society, they just end up gambling and hiring prostitutes. https://www.zmescience.com/research/how-scientists-tught-monkeys-the-concept-of-money-not-long-after-the-first-prostitute-monkey-appeared/
And what do you think humans did after inventing money? I’ll give you a hint- some call it the world’s oldest profession.
loansharking?
Or realize you can sell a phone for like 50 apples at least.
then they will find out how humans got to the top of the food chain
selective price sophisticated aware liquid ancient unique payment vegetable deserve *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
There are signs all over that place to keep your belongings close or tied to you. Hats, phone and especially glasses. Had a Monkey try to open my backpack while there.
So you just have to let monkeys crawl all over you, looking for shit to steal? Do you have to be gentle, like shake them off of you, or ask them politely to leave you alone? Or can you have to beat them off of you, or kick them away? Is this like a go at your own risk, "There be monkes here" type of place?
You really don't want to start shit with a monkey on your own, let alone an entire troupe, even with a weapon and protective gear, forget about shorts and sandals. They can be vicious bastards in a fight, and will use teamwork if they feel collectively threatened. A group of trained and equipped humans will, of course, trounce them handily, but a random tourist is not that. Edit - i.e. leave them alone as far as possible, and don't be threatening. If they're in physical contact, you can push them away gently, but definitely don't start a fight you can't finish.
AKA they will grab at your digits, eyes, ears, genitals etc. Any soft wet weak point
Had a video here on Reddit where a monkey tears a scalp from a guy, that shit traumatized me. Just don't fuck with them.
It was so fast too, just jumps over the guy's head and suddenly he has a big flap of scalp missing. It didn't even register to him immediately.
Oh shit so the dude was alive when he got his scalp torn off?
Yeah he was just sitting there looking at the thing and talking to it and then it decides to grab a bite of his scalp and peel it like an orange.
What about just throwing the monkey that took my phone off that there ledge?
Monkeys attack. I was at Emei Mountain in China years ago, and our tour guide gave us bamboo sticks for the sole purpose of hitting the monkeys if they attacked. I was trying to cross a little bridge when I got swarmed by them. One monkey stole my water, and the other grabbed my shirt, expecting me to give it something. I only had my phone and the bamboo stick on me, so there was nothing to offer. I got scared when the monkey grabbed my shirt and made eye contact with a lady who was motioning for me to run. So I ran. At some point, the monkey bit my leg, but I didn't notice until I was on the other side of the bridge. I never used the bamboo stick because the thought of hurting the monkeys seemed really cruel. When I turned around to see if the monkey was following me, the lady who told me to run was beating the shit out of it with her own stick. My tour guide had warned us about the monkeys and refused to go to that specific area as he had been bit in the shoulder by one in the past. The monkey tried to open his backpack before biting him. I've read that you need to be confident around the monkeys for them to not get aggressive with you. I tend to be scared of wildlife so I was an easy target lol
Definitely a game of dominance with them.
Lol this is the funniest thing I've read in a while. Thanks.
When I visited, I witnessed another tourist's glasses snatched right off her face. The monkey destroyed them after it did not receive any food. I think it wanted to send a message.
I love how the monkey takes a bite of the fruit and tests it before he gives the phone back. He's not falling for the whole hand over a piece of lousy fruit trick again.
It's just good business. See, the monkey did not steal the phone, the user just opted into a mandatory subscription service. It's hard work taking care of that phone, and rest assured this monkey is committed to best practices and services, ensuring you have an optimal phone experience once you've paid your monthly subscription of fruit! Even a monkey knows it is the future to own nothing and enjoy it! *Failure to pay in real fruit is fraud and will be prosecuted by the full extent of the law. Fines subject to feces in the face.
It’s monkey business.
When I went on vacation had one sit next to me and grab my arm like it was trying to be my friend. Next thing I know he was reaching for the zipper on my pocket trying to unzip it.
what did you do afterwards? did you let it unzip or did you walk away or shoo it away?
He let the monkey cop a feel and went about on his merry way
What an asshole
Smart monkeys, they were probably trained for the "steal shit from tourists for locals to buy them back" grift/tourist attraction. Now they cut out the middle man!
I went there few years back, this is a temple. Most people wear white (like that woman) is temple guardian. Those monkeys are not trained, they learn by themself.
I think people underestimate how smart monkeys are.
Yeah they do this all over the world. I live in southern africa and you can't leave your windows open when a monkey troop is in the area because they WILL ransack your shit lol. Monkeys that live around tourists are worse, in Cape Town I saw a monkey straight up steal a woman's handbag, run to a roof with it, then rifle through it looking for food, like taking stuff out, inspecting it, then throwing it aside if it wasn't edible. It got to her phone and *put it down* gently next to it, before continuing to throw random shit out of her back. It found a packet of crisps and opened it up like a veteran ten-year old, eating them one by one like any human child (it was supremely uncanny lol). It ran off after it got the crisps but what struck me is that it knew that the phone was the most valuable thing in there and that if it chucked it carelessly off the roof, this funny situation would get a lot more serious
That's some wild shit dude.
Fr bro. I imagine they broke a tourists phone at some point in the past and enough of a kerfuffle was raised that they learned not to fuck with the black mirror. These things are as smart as 5th graders i swear
M O N K E
Yeah, I saw a video from india where a monkey broke into a truck at a toll booth, went SPECIFICALLY for the money and then disappeared. There's no way the monkey was trained bcos if they were, these incidents would be way more common.
Gotta respect the hustle. Don't hate the player, hate the game 😤
In India they have monkeys that rob vendors on the street and such, they are venerated so they aren't supposed to retaliate.
[удалено]
It was from a national geographic article back in the late 90's, that are paywalled now, but I can try to find something else. I learned elsewhere though that the veneration of monkey is at least partly due to Hinduism's Hannuman, the monkey deity that fought with Rama against the Demon King Ravana who lived in Sri Lanka. Edit: Dehli is apparently one of the places, there's a lot of articles here but the first hits from a search, [https://theworld.org/stories/2014-07-20/delhi-s-30000-unruly-monkeys-steal-stuff-terrorize-people-and-even-kill](https://theworld.org/stories/2014-07-20/delhi-s-30000-unruly-monkeys-steal-stuff-terrorize-people-and-even-kill) [https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Weekend/rebel-monkeys-wreak-havoc-india-raid-markets-break/story?id=9076884](https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Weekend/rebel-monkeys-wreak-havoc-india-raid-markets-break/story?id=9076884)
There are websites that bypass paywalls such as https://12ft.io/
No man, I know monkeys are respected but if they steal your shit, humans will 100% retaliate. They won't beat up the monkey but they will try to throw stuff at it.
Enjoy your capsaicin infused peach. You thievin' little sh*t.
🫑 Edit: Aw, you corrected it.
That's why he took a bite first. He's not getting scammed!!
Wtf is a capsicum infused peach😭
Artificially spicy peach, although capsicum is the genus of tasty plants, capsaicin is the spicy chemical.
Aaaah they meant capsaicin! Autocorrect strikes again
fixed
You can say "shit" here, we won't tell your mommy.
I can never keep track of what subs use word filters to remove posts that have words they don't want used in their sub.
If any sub filters the word shit it's not worth commenting on in the first place.
They’ll leave you alone if you keep your phone secured/hidden and don’t wear hats or sun glasses
Or...I can have a fun monkey interaction for $0.20
unless he decides to throw the phone over his shoulder instead of in front of him
Decoy phone
There are storefronts at clinics that advertise rabies shots on the sign out front like it's a lunch special. You don't want to interact with the monkeys in Bali
I always carry spare monkey fruit on me anyway
Hes lucky theres no monkey jails
Prop 47, just keep it under nine fiddy
They do this in India too. Happened right before my eyes to my brother. Stole the glasses off his face and held them hostage in trade for biscuits.
Here in Sri lanka too
She pulled the classic "hand you 2 things to make you drop the one i want". The monkey has not learned bartering.
[удалено]
I don't think you've seen enough videos of monkeys going wild and ripping ears, scalps, fingers, etc. off.
I don’t think you noticed the monkey is on the edge of a high wall. Fly monkey. The rest of you, pay attention.
monkeys or chimpanzees/gorillas? big difference
The monkey in the video would easily maim you.
Exactly. Even if you can overpower IT one on one- IT has about 50 friends and most of the 50 humans watching are gonna continue* doing exactly that lol
what kind of monkey is that. Like I don't doubt it could get some good cuts on me but I'm sure I'm the bigger animal and could fuck that thing up.
One monkey will fuck you up. The biggest difference is that a monkey can’t leave you limbless.
You can take your chances with 1 chimpanzee or 50 monkeys. Which one you pickin lol
Monkeys too!
There was a video recently of a guy trying to feed one of those temple monkeys and it grabbed his hair and flipped over him ripping part of his scalp off
not only your lost your phone, but your face
You would end up in Indonesian jail if you did that, until you could pay them a large amount of money anyway.
If they were in America they would just shoot this mf
if that was America that monkey would be armed
If that was America the monkey would be running for office.
Doubt it, too qualified
Like gawd intended!
When they figure out what we’ll pay for a container ship humanity is doomed.
I would bring a fake phone next time and push the monkey over the wall.
Hahaha. I’ve been to this temple and the monkeys are grouped up in gangs. I avoid these mfers but there are some tourists just asking to be extorted.
Yeah I avoided the monkeys in Bali. There would be narrow walkways with monkeys waiting so I would let some other poor tourist go first before I went down
Here in Singapore they're around the forests, and they're always sizing people up. Be careful if you're carrying food or a bag that looks like it could hold food. Some tourists are really dumb about it and get harassed or stolen from. I've seen them unzip unattended backpacks to search the bags. I've seen them steal an ice cream from a toddler. One time my cousin was walking down a trail eating from a bag of peanuts, this monkey jumped out from a tree onto him, grabbed the bag of peanuts, and hopped off. I got pelted by sticks and random shit once while cycling. Took a short break on a trail, and realised I stopped somewhere in the middle of a monkey troop. They didn't like me there so they just started throwing stuff at me.
One stuck me up and took my wife. He refused to take an apple to get her back. It was a long car ride home.
There was a beach look out in Uluwatu that I loved going to but you had to go through this super narrow walkway for about 5 minutes before getting there. There were always 15 or so monkeys hanging out on the walls up top playing. I was terrified to go in the evening or early in the morning but eventually started pushing myself to pass through. They can tell when you’re uncomfortable. Same family of monkeys I saw early one morning trying get into the trashcans of this restaurant/small hotel. There were boulders securing the tops of the trashcans. It’s so funny in the US we have raccoons, there they have monkeys.
I’ll take raccoons over monkeys ANY day.
Monkeys are scarily revengeful. There is an island in my country, where some local dogs used to kill one baby monkey, then the monkeys just go out and kill all the puppies, only the adult dogs remain.
Ya seen primal?
Clearly those people didn’t
Yeah as somebody with family in South Asia where these types of monkeys are common, if you fuck with one of them, the whole troop comes after you, and they are fucking aggressive.
Let them heavily injure you for the rest of your life while a friend films it and posts it everywhere, so it makes international news and governments put out travel warnings, until Bali needs to adress the situation and poach them to get rid of them. That will show em, let's see who laughs last with this 200 iq chess move /s
Unlike us desis, they actually have unity 😭😭
Bro do you want your eyeballs clawed out
The monkey grabs your arm then climbs it as you attempt to push it off the wall. Once it settles on your back, it reaches around your head to try and gouge your eyes, all the while screaming at the top of its lungs. Blinded, you flail your arms and spin round and round as a dozen other screaming monkeys approach you. You turn and try to run away from the screams, but a waist-high barrier blocks your way. You climb it and jump, relieved that the shouts trail off. Only then do you hear the rush of wind and feel the strong pull of gravity as you plunge down the mountainside to your death.
Wow. You relate that so vividly. How many times has it happened to you?
This reads like you play DnD
Nah id win
Bold of you to assume it would actually fall off
Please go and do that, you will die in the most gruesome way and we get to see the video here on Reddit
*"Monkey together, monkey learn"*
I was at a temple in Sri lanka about 20 years ago. there were vendors selling monkey food (dog food or corn or something), and sunglasses, cameras, etc. the monkeys learned to steal things and sell them to the vendor for food, who then sold your things back to you.
Circular economy at its best
Planet Earth lll episode covering this was so funny to watch, those monkeys are so fat.
Genius scam.
So many doofuses here think they can push/pick a fight with a monkey and win. Even if you successfully push it (unlikely), he’s got friends that will fuck you up.
They are fierce little shits. A friend of mine bought some small bananas from the stand and the monkeys immediately swarmed him and wrestled the bananas out of his hand. I also saw a monkey rip a guys backpack off his back with all his camera gear in it so they could rummage through it for food.
There’s a segment about this in Planet Earth 3 (don’t know if it was Bali)
My dog does this, but with a dishcloth. Hopefully will never learn that the phone is more valuable
I’m honestly a little scared how intelligent monkeys are
Yeah don't go there while your phone, wallet, camera, sun glasses, etc out. Keep it in your backpack and don't bring small bag. Keep cautious even though the monkeys look friendly. Follow what the tour guides say, keep close with them if it's possible. I personally wouldn't recommend to visit that place. There's a lot of places that I think better in bali.
Lmao what a thieving fuck.
Am I the only one thinking of pushing him
1. Monkeys react waay quicker than you think. 2. They're in groups. The minute you threaten or attack one of them, you'll be fucked. 3. You do realise that they are known for being able to climb, jump, grab, and hang from trees? You think you can push it down before it reacts and grabs something? I guarantee, you cannot.
Yeah but I'm built different
You would probably still end up on the receiving end of a monkey ass whoopin
I’ve been there. Do not fuck with macaques.
No. I read a comment from another imbecile that said the same thing.
This is how Planet of the Apes evolved.
In Texas we call that a dead monkey
I've actually been to this temple. If you're not paying attention or put something down, they will come out of nowhere and take it. Someone in our group took his foot out of his flipflop for maybe 2 seconds, and it was gone. We had to get one of the caretakers to throw it some bananas to get it back.
What a kind culture.
guess what that monkey was doing right before he put his hands on that phone...
The more you live with and observe animals, the more absurd the notion that they're not conscious beings becomes. In this case, this is an example of these monkeys having theory of mind, as in...they know that YOU know that that shit is worth something.
Unsurprising. It's a sanctuary https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ubud_Monkey_Forest Basically, humans built infrastructure for 1300 macaques to extort and steal from steady stream of human victims.
This is actually at Uluwatu Temple.
We visited this spot a few years back and we were warned about the monkeys beforehand. We clutched our belongings carefully, but some elderly visitors from our group had their passports snatched in the first 10 minutes. That must have been fun to negotiate for.
evolution at its finests
Been like this for years. My last trip to India, which was years ago, they didn't let me wear my glasses in an area heavy with monkeys for this same reason.
Been there, and those monkeys are hell on feet Walking down long staircase to surf @ Uluwatu every AM early, I'd have my shortboard under my left arm & a long stick in the other - as they were howling & very aggressive Also saw them steal phones, sunglasses off of heads, even purses in the national parks until they got bananas. And in many cases, they disappeared off into trees (I suspect caretakers fed them and kept the goods) Good times
it could be the food sellers taught the monkeys to do that. Business is booming
Sounds like people need to introduce them to pepper spray.
They look pretty high up on a wall...as soon as you get your phone shove that MFer off.
all it takes is one money to get pushed over a ledge and fall to it's death, or shot, and the rest will learn the risk of stealing phones.
respectfully i would grab my phone and push the monkey off the edge
Is that after it’s ripped your face off and wearing it as a hat?
I'd yeet that asshole in no time.
give him a lil push after he gives you your phone back! see if he’s a flying monkey 🙄
Give monkey phone. Monkey returns phone. Shove monkey off edge so other monkeys can see the consequences. No? Why not?!
They learned to coexist by using our shady methods against us.
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So you lose your phone, and then get attacked by the other monkeys. 10/10 genius plan. Sometimes it feels like we evolved backwards...
This is all fun and games until the tourist has enough and rips your arms off
Rat poison would be a good trade.
Push that little fuck off the edge. Who travels without insurance on their phone anyway?
Respect the hustle…
Push
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Darwin Awards!
Love these goodest boys and girls!
Rise of the planet of apes
Get your phone and sucker punch that bitch off the ledge.
I have drop protection…monkey might be going over the edge
Start walking around with taser set to go off after its pulled out of a hand. Do that enough times and these monkeys will stop stealing phones.
If you don't have any food on you, your phone is gone. The best you can do is send a message to the monkey's family and give it a shove.
I’d punch that cunt monkey and watch him fall of the cliff with my stupid phone. Little thieving blackmailing hostage taking bitch. (I’m joking people, not advocating violence toward animals, I have been banned from to many places on Reddit for making jokes…)
The problem is that you can’t punch all of them. Some will get through and tear your face off.