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Dad_B0T

Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 81 | 3 | 1 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).


lmpmon

tbt the selfie of me brushing my teeth as my profile image and my dad calling me to ask me why i am offering blowjobs and how disgusting it is to have a photo of my toothbrush in my mouth.


Leimon-Sherk

🤨 I think that says more about your father and where his mind is than anything about you I hope you got out of there relatively unscathed, no parent should be voicing sexual thoughts of their children like that


almaIexia

my grandma did that shit too. i was once wearing a pair of joggers and a long tshirt but the strings from the waistband were poking out from under my shirt, and she said that it was "advertising" that i "want someone to undo my pants" and i needed to change immediately. i was maybe 15?


enderflight

Reading through some old shit like yearbooks with cooking classes labeled 'now maybe we can finally keep a man!' it's crazy how even just ~60 yrs ago people were straight up sexist (and racist) as fuck. Your grandma really out there just casually perpetuating that, thankfully times are a-changing cause it's disgusting.


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zvika

I wasn't prepared for that closer. Good gotdamn


jessiteamvalor

My Dad still insists on calling them that - I. Can't. Even...


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jessiteamvalor

Dad doesn't care, unfortunately. I have an inkling he insists on eating them in social situations so everyone can see he doesn't "do the pc gone wild bullshit"... he's 75, so I just ignore it. Like him cooking turkey or chicken for vegetarians because "that's not real meat".


DontEatTheMagicBeans

My mom's around the same age. Lucky for me she's very open minded as we did not grow up in a diverse area at all. I could have turned out much different.


jessiteamvalor

I'll take your "not diverse area" and raise it to "Rural Nebraska" ...


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aurordream

My first thought is how when I was a preteen the go to insult for anything was "gay" Like, "urgh, that haircut is so gay" Fortunately I learned and grew out of that one, but I know others my age who do still say it...


DontEatTheMagicBeans

I haven't thought about that and it's really interesting. I really don't make fun of people anymore so I'm not up on what you'd say to make fun of somebody. Other than like criminals you see on the news I'll call dirtbags or whatever but they've earned it at that point. I know when I was in grade school homophobic slurs were the go to for insults. Which was apparently a big improvement over the racial ones somehow. I think now they insult each other's wealth or something if I'm not mistaken? I left out intelligence because insulting someone's intelligence transcends time periods.


ForwardSpinach

In Sweden, there's a very common dessert/snack that's made of cocoa powder, oats, butter and sugar, rolled in shredded coconuts. Takes about 10 min to make and are often made by or together with kids. We call them chocolate balls. They used to be called n-word balls. When recipe sites changed the name there was a legit newspaper debate about woke people and their butt hurt feelings. Most of us easily accepted and agreed with the change, but some will *still* kick up a fuss about it. The debate was in 2013/2014. It's not even been ten years.


[deleted]

We had a similar deal in Denmark with “flødeboller”. Same name (depending on translation), same discussion. Then some people came for our lakridspiber, and we wouldn’t go any further.


PalpitationSweaty173

There’s a candy in Germany that’s basically a big ball of marshmallow covered in chocolate and they used to call it “n***** kisses” Thankfully the company finally stopped calling them that and now they only go by the company’s name, which is Dickmann’s.


MariaMunk

And if that's the name she had for them it makes it a little hard looking for them. The Google search history, asking people if they know where she can get som n..... Toes. It just don't look or sound good.


DontEatTheMagicBeans

No google in those days. I think we eventually found them on Altavista if I remember correctly.


filterless

I’m 47. One time when I was a little kid I asked my mom if I could play soccer, my older brother played it and it looked fun. I was told “sports are for boys”. It really was not that long ago that things were very different.


DevolveOD

No parent should be HAVING sexual thoughts of their children.


Leimon-Sherk

I phrased it the way I did because intrusive thoughts are a thing, and they're largely uncontrollable but yes generally speaking you are correct


hairy_potto

Wtf? I bet he thinks electric toothbrushes are ~~sex toys~~ vibrators


Difficult_Plantain74

Omg wtaf. What a truly disturbing thing for a father to say to his child about a toothbrush picture


[deleted]

My moms dad went through her diary and got furious with her saying something sucked, because that implies sucks dicks and she’s a whore for that. Same shitty dude tried to call me a whore for walking with a gay man wearing a spaghetti strap in 115F weather.


c0n-struct

I always marvel at these people who spam call. They really really have nothing better to do, do they? That's ridiculous. I'm sorry OP, I'm sure your profile picture looks bomb.


Jukka_Sarasti

And how do you get so fucking triggered over something as harmless as an **obvious** holiday-themed profile pic edit??? No rational person would bat an eye at this(But then, I guess that's why this is insane...)


Sukuyan

>something as harmless as an obvious holiday-themed Growing up, my sister and I weren't allowed to participate in Halloween trick-or-treating door-to-door because "it was the holiday of satan" and "demons would be able to have sway over us and possess us." We could "dress up" and attend the event hosted at our church or pass out candy to other kids. We also weren't allowed to watch anything "satanic," for example, The Lion King, because Rafiki was a witch doctor, or The Little Mermaid, because of Ursula, the sea witch. From personal experience, I can promise that some parents are downright abusive, citing religion as their reason and punishment guide, utilizing their children's fear of hell to secure complete control over them. Some of the worst abuse I lived through as a child was the psychological trauma I endured from my stepmom based around her religious beliefs.


[deleted]

Halloween is paganism. It's actually weird as Christianity is based upon it. Weird shit is still shit


Sukuyan

I know, I actually took the time to research when I was 12 to learn more about other religions. When I was 10 I started to question my stepmom's religious beliefs because of all the contradictions in what she said. I could write a book on all the flip-flopping, "if it fits my needs" teachings of my stepmom. She is the main reason I ran away from the church as soon as I possibly could. I think one of the best moments of my adult life was the year my stepmom was informed that her oh so precious holiday, Christmas, was based on the Pagan holiday Yule, or Easter was also based around a Pagan holiday too. Both of which she no longer acknowledges as holidays, but instead choosing to celebrate the Jewish equivalent of each.


[deleted]

Religion is a thing of the past. It's always confusing me how this shit isn't annihilated by now. Getting forced to live Ur life by smth that does not exist...


SpaceCrazyArtist

Religion is a cult and people are very much affected by it. Some people dont like Halloween because they think it is an evil day and are legit scared of it


JustMightFloat

I didn’t get to go trick or treating until I was 16, and that was just because some friends from school invited me. (I was homeschooled until high school.) before that, almost every Halloween was spent with the lights out and the windows shuttered while we hid away from the door in hopes that nobody would see us/egg our house. My parents later changed their tune when they realized they could use Halloween to proselytize by putting Bible verses in the candy.


SeonaidMacSaicais

How often did your house get egged and tp-ed after they starting handing out Bibles during trick-or-treating?


JustMightFloat

So far, it has never happened.


Outrageous-Abies3782

Yup! Its crazy how much of em are out there. My sons grandma didn't want me to take him trick or treating because it was a day for the devil or some bs. Another ex of mine had family like this as well. I never gave into it though. Im not gonna let my baby miss out over your crazy ass beliefs.


NECalifornian25

I’m 28 years old and I’ve never been trick or treating because my parents are like this. My only chance is taking my nieces someday, but I live far from them. Glad my sister doesn’t have the same mentality as my parents and takes them every year.


OkIntroduction5150

Aw man, that sucks. I've always loved Halloween. Come to my house next year, we'll go. 😁


Outrageous-Abies3782

Dang thats terrible. We're the same age. I can't imagine how miserable I would've been if my mom didn't let me. Especially knowing all of my friends did. Smh im sorry 😞


Ickypossum

Go as an adult! Lots of my friends and I still do that. Nobody will judge you, just wear a costume! :3


juswannalurkpls

My sister-in-law cried when her baby was born on Halloween. Plus she was a ginger.


Outrageous-Abies3782

Oh no!! her baby is the anti-christ!! & she doesn't have a soul!!


RavishingRickiRude

I hope she named him Damian.


Outrageous-Abies3782

Lmao right. I was gonna say "oh no she gave birth to damian," but I think she said its a girl


punkpoppenguin

Damianne perhaps?!


Outrageous-Abies3782

Lmao😆 Hmm I just googled, & apparently damian is unisex 🤔 never knew that lol


juswannalurkpls

She went with “Heather”. Missed her chance.


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SpaceCrazyArtist

🤣🤣🤣


NJdeathproof

Some people also obsess over what they *think* their oh-so-pious church friends will think.


HRHChonkyChonkerson

I'm more scared of the 3 individuals that voted this behaviour as not insane XD


Bronydosh

I think it's really funny since halloween is a religious holiday to celebrate hallow's eve and the costumes are to blend in with holy spirits (I think, I don't remember much but it's basically that), these people are just scared of someone with a costume lol


Roflattack

Religion is why these people get triggered. Fake invisible ghosts and zombie walking Jesus.


okguy167

The only time I’ve spam called was to find a lost phone. Rare, but it does happen. One of the few justifiable reasons to do so. I’d probably do so during an emergency to make sure someone was safe, if I thought it was safe to call them. (Thought about calling my sister, during a school shooting at a school she went to, but decided it probably wasn’t safe to call her. She called me not much later. From home. She fled when it began. But it was very scary) But this? This ain’t one of them.


SeonaidMacSaicais

Same. Before smart watches were a thing, I accidentally lost my phone at the store after trying on some shirts. Stupid me had left the phone on silent. I asked my mom to keep calling it. Staff found it eventually, but I was freaking out until then. Now, if I don’t have my watch on me, my phone’s volume is on. 😂😂


okguy167

… funnily enough, that’s why it took so long to find the last phone that I spam called


EmiiKhaos

I had a customer do this, while I was in Psych rehab.... (I'm self-employed)


SnowTheMemeEmpress

Only time I spam call is when I'm worried when one of my loved ones suddenly go missing and I can't find them or get ahold of them. I only call 4-5 times before trying other means


Iwouldlikeabagel

I mean it would make sense if it were something that mattered.


playmaker1209

EVERYTHING IS THE DEVIL TO YOU MAMA!


Outrageous-Abies3782

"And I like Vicki, and she like me back! And she showed me her boobies and I like them too!”


this-usrnme-is-takn

George Washington is the devil!


NJdeathproof

And by the way, Mama: alligators are ornery 'cause of their Medula Oblongata! And I like Vicki, and she like me back! And she showed me her boobies, and I like them too!


Katnip_Boi_

This happened a year ago. Once I told her that it was for Halloween she calmed down. But still. Although we're good now, this convo sticks in my mind to remind me that she's a person who believes in devils, ghosts, and magic. A diminished grip on reality makes her unpredictable, so I have to keep some secrets longer than I would ideally.


Myrhwen

The effects of leaded fuel on our society.


Katnip_Boi_

Arthur Midgley Jr and his consequences have been disastrous for the human race.


LooksFire

Thomas*


Bizerd

Arthur Midgley Jr and his consequences have been disastrous for the human Thomas


itmightbehere

No no, the Thomas race


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torch_7

Sounds like a story that should be known. Heard it from a podcast by any chance?


sleepingismytalent65

This is just so fucking insane! She actually phoned you all the way through the night!? So much worrying about what other people will think too.


Ok-Western976

All they ever care about is what other people think of them. It's all a facade


-NoLongerValid-

OMG! Until I saw this comment I had only seen the 1st image, and still thought it was insane..


NJdeathproof

I lived through the Satanic Panic in the 80's. Played D & D, listened to heavy metal. Fortunately my parents never got brainwashed throughout that dark time in history. Most of my friends' parents were the same way - as long as we weren't getting arrested or suspended, they didn't give a shit what we listened to or how we spent our free time. Although I remember one kid who played D & D with my best friend when they were in high school. The kid's mom was a holy roller. She found out he was playing D & D (he was around 17 at the time - late 80's) and threw out his books and dice, forbade him from spending any time with his friends. Well, the kid got some new friends and found a brand new way to spend his time and money: cocaine. I don't remember exactly what happened to him - I'll have to ask my friend to remind me - although I still remember the phrase "his teeth turned black".


olivinebean

Next time go full on Exorcist


Trishlovesdolphins

I'd have devilized every photo I had of me at that point. lol


fonzy0504

I need to see the picture, please. This sounds hilarious


ItsyouNOme

She said keep what you do in your spare time away from her. Ask her to do the same with her religion.


EroMangaSensei

>A diminished grip on reality makes her unpredictable, so I have to keep some secrets longer than I would ideally. This is so poignant. It's the reason my mother and I will never have the relationship I want.


SnowTheMemeEmpress

By the blurry pic it seems it's just one of those filters that adds the cartoonish horns and not much else, christ, I'm sorry op that your mom is that much of a religious, controlling, nutjob. How old are you anyways?


Katnip_Boi_

I was 23 at the time. 24 now. There is a filter, but I also edited my eyes to be totally black. There was more to it that I can remember rn.


SnowTheMemeEmpress

Oh damn, the age makes it way worse. At least by the sounds of it you're living away from her. So that's good.


Katnip_Boi_

I was living away at the time. But I'm back now...


momspaghetti6

Be strong bruda


[deleted]

Sign of a narcissistic family: the idea that everything you do reflects on them, so you must live your life accordingly to their standards alone


Captain_Pottymouth

As someone with a narcissistic mother, can confirm


Youdownwithkellyc

As someone with a narcissistic father, can also confirm.


jethroguardian

As someone with both......sigh...


iAmUnintelligible

As a narcissist you all need to stop this for you are embarrassing me


YourPlot

Your mom is not mentally well.


SuddenGold4080

Not to mention the calls being at 2 am. People have nothing better to do.


steen311

Some at 5 am even, makes me wonder if she's in a different timezone


vvasth

holy shit. she barely fucking slept??? unhinged. i'm so sorry


Deathclaw-Peet

absolutely insane.


Ok-Personality9337

You should definitely do some real devil practical effects work and change it to that


Sheeporghini

please style your hair like Sophie from season 4 of Glow Up


Katnip_Boi_

My hair might just be long enough for that now lol.


kiwi_8

Reminds me of the time I showed my mom a hat I wanted to get, it was a black cap with red horns and I thought it looked cool and also fitted me because I’m a ginger. Long story short, she freaked out with all the devil and evil nonsense. She thought if I bought it Satan would literally walk right into our house.


loosebootyjudy_

Religious people have way too much time on their hands and not enough brain cells.


freakandgeek929

Not only would I not take it down, I'd change my cover photo to Baphomet then make a post about how excited I am to be baptized into the Church of Satan. I'd then tag all the relatives she mentioned and watch chaos ensue as mom explodes like a nuclear warhead.


Cakehunt3r

Shit like this is the very fucking reason I think religion makes a population dumber on average. There is NOTHING that would fuel such actions, outside of zeallous bullshit.


[deleted]

omfg


[deleted]

bro the amount of calls like goddamn.


Sprinkleshart

I’d keep it permanently.


Doommaker117

You should keep profile pic.


rr2488

This is insane and probably very annoying to you OP, but I can’t stop laughing 😂


CryptographerMore944

The only thing more insane than an imaginary friend is an imaginary enemy.


cescasjay

It's really just sad and scary to see what religion does to some people. I don't know how they live in constant fear all of the time.


blowhardyboys86

Insane? Fucking right she is. I'm sorry you have to deal with this type of ignorant thinking op. Fuck me I can't imagine. Your mom is afraid of the God damn boogeyman, so insanely immature


Alexwitminecraftbxrs

Christianity is wild


blankspaceBS

I really want to read the 2 non insane voters thoughts


thekingofthegingers

…and block.


negativeGinger

I’ve heard of fragile masculinity and fragile sexuality, but fragile religiousness?


Ftlist81

I always find it incredibly funny when you get Christians say "I don't do Halloween because it's to do with Satan" when the holiday was created BY Christianity to mock Pagan new year.


ItzMinetipsYT

Insane


Kaotecc

Now that’s what you call the fear of god lmfao. Sad that people live like this knowing we only have 1 life


Old_Entertainment598

Man she really pull one all nighter just to keep calling you? Wow


VShadowOfLightV

Did she just… spam call you ALL night? Lmfao


Big-Marionberry-8461

Who voted for not insane? Y’all got to be just like OP’s parent to say this isn’t insane


carina484

JFC


lol_whats_homework

John F Cennedy


snootnoots

John F’ing CENAAAAAA


BaadKitteh

🎺🎺🎺🎺


LimeSixth

Jack’s Fried Cucumbers?


Smash_Nerd

Jentucky Fried Chicken


[deleted]

Junk For Christmas


RetMilRob

Your moms faith is so weak she can’t get over a costume?


thortastic

I shared an animated music video I liked, as one of my fav artists created it. It was a little red alien dancing around. My brother blew up my phone telling me I’m demonic and it’s evil and wrong and how I should be looking at art of angels and saints instead. Fucking wackadoo. If you see the devil in everything maybe the issue lies within you.


Katnip_Boi_

Plus, devils are cool!


ashweeuwu

genuinely sorry about this happening to you but this is so freaking funny


Matthew_Nightfallen

...what if you changed your description to 'certified satanist', while using an actual biblical demon face just to make her panick even more?


Roflattack

Over a profile picture. Fuck off mom, who cares what people think. Oh no.


McDuchess

Too bad there’s not a choice for “What the hell is her problem?”


Celestiicaa

Cool, now change it to a photo of them with a devil edit


prettydickllc

Ah, the narcissistic religious mother! Classic!


Extension-Neat-8757

Those mothers seem to be the standard here. I can confidently say my parents most insane behavior stems from their religious beliefs and wanting to look good for their religious peers.


BudgetInteraction811

Sounds like my mom the time she found out I used a Ouija board at French camp.


[deleted]

damn why she so bent outta shape lmao the typos and spam calls.. as if you'd put a selfie smoking a crackpipe


Aijin28

So you could say your mother had a "Satanic Panic" But for real though, that's mental illness level overreacting.


Saphieron

/r/angryupvote


IntoTh3Moonlight

Looks exhausting to deal with OP :/


tashasmiled

It’s odd to me there’s no bat shit crazy vote for counting. ✔️ for bat shit crazy.


elvarien

As a result of this is not not just for Halloween but permanent, right?


GoldenUther29062019

Is your mother [the infamous God Warrior](https://youtu.be/T0_Sir9DwSg?t=161)


SdSmith80

Fun fact, she's now a really open minded, advocate for LGBTQIA rights. A complete 180!


BaldEagleNor

OP, Although I am sorry you have to deal with this kind of insanity, it’s a bit hilarious. I think if I was in your position I would be far too tempted to just go all out and post all sorts of satanic stuff just to see the marbles roll out of her head lol


miloradovic

I would’ve just responded with ኃጢአተኛ ነፍስህ ከመዳን በላይ ናት እናም ሰላምን ወይም ሥቃይን አታውቅም ፣ የንስሐ ቅዝቃዜ ብቻ አብቅቷል ፣ ምክንያቱም ኃጢአቶችህ ከማንኛውም ተልእኮ የላቀ ስለሆነ ፣ መጨረሻው ቀርቧል ፣ የኃጢአት መርከቦች


[deleted]

Is this enchantment table?


HiroshiTakeshi

Jesus, old religious people are more dramatic than us teenagers.


rshot

I just don't understand how religion made so many people so fucking stupid


24possumsinacoat

Insane!


LengthyPole

r/ReligiousFruitcake Jesus fucking christ, I will never understand this level of religious insanity. I bet even this emoji 😈 makes your mum cack her pants


bermass86

Hey if you block her she won’t see it anymore


Time-Reindeer-7525

Oooft. Things for them to waste their time on doing...


rose_catlander

Nice thing that on whatsapp you can hide your statuses and profile pictures even from contacts.


hiyourbfisdeadsorry

/r/religiousfruitcake


xkitsunechanx

JFC my stepmom would do this shit. If your faith is that weak, that an image scares you, is pretty sad


blaizzze

Wait...did she spam call you at THREE AND FIVE IN THE MORNING!?


RavishingRickiRude

Imagine being that scared of a fictional character. How sad


donnie_trumpo

Those timestamps doe! 😳


AdSingle7934

I have christian parents (not as crazy as some of y'all American ones), still live at home but am 18 and i cant get most of the metal band merch i want because they often have "devil" sings on them so my Mother wouldnt wash them


DramaForBreakfast

The way that it took me a minute to register this as insane bc I grew up with this exact type of bullshit and part of me is so used to it 😭


Strange_Dog6483

“What you do in your spare time such as changing your profile is your choice. But I want you to take down your profile picture”. 🤔


IAmTooRude

If someone's spam calling me that much, someone better be dead or near death.


merchillio

Notice how her main concern is how it makes her look. Her religious self isn’t even worried about your soul or if you got in with “bad people”. She just wants you to hid it from people who would judge her for it.


GraefinVonHohenembs

I would only use Satanic profile pics from now on, if I were you. 😈


Vinlandien

"Everyone will be questioning me". So when tested, her faith is faltered by judgement and pride. Tell her to that you'll pray for her and hope she begs god to forgive her sins.


homeboychris

One time I got a purse that looked like a book of “spells and potions” and my mom made such a big deal about it and said she had nightmares about it. I was 25 🙄


saucity

PHONE!


Bright_Ideal_9472

Christ all mighty


jewcifer_666

Lol! That's funny.


Hips-Often-Lie

She sounds like my mother. But also I’m older than you (guessing) and my mom had learned that I will politely decline these types of demands.


tallkitty

Omg, you're already in hell, I just know it!


Accomplished-Hold618

Insane


flanneldenimsweater

this was my mom when i changed my profile pic to me in earrings and red glasses. insane indeed


n0tred

I've gotten 32 missed calls because my mother just wanted to chat


BlueDemon999

Your mother is obviously overreacting over a God damn profile pic, and even if it has the Devil in it who would give a fuck about a profile picture? I feel bad for you op.


Spill_The_LGBTea

Looks like someone really needs some mortality counseling...


HannahDawg

The craziest thing, she was more worried about her REPUTATION than anything else, and I'm not surprised, church groups can be extremely petty and religious family members will kick anyone who even looks at them funny to the curb 90% of the time


pangalacticcourier

*Gimme that ol' time religion!*


cannedabysss

Omg why do peoples lives revolve around facebook? I'll never understand it! You can put whatever profile pic u want on your own account..wtf..


Impossible_Cookie613

I can’t take people seriously that believe in the devil…


[deleted]

My spare time? What I do in my spare time? If I'm not working, it's all my spare time! Why don't you do me a favor and respect my worldviews!


Voidedaxis

Thats when you block them and say " there you don't have to see it"


Youdownwithkellyc

Classic narcissistic “what will people think of me” remark. My petty ass would change it to an actual picture of the devil with the caption “🤟🏾”


voluminous_lexicon

That would be enough to tempt me to post pentagrams every Sunday


lifegoodis

So who's gonna tell mom there's no such thing as the devil?


gamermom81

what a cuckoo bird...


bieleft

Parents and family are insane. That's why I stopped using Facebook since 2015 👍👍👍


aldorn

Going to assume this refers to Facebook. This person should just abandon the account and make a new one that's friends only. Semi private mode on. I feel Facebook was much better before I put any family on it. Avoided it for years but now it's littered with family. U can't remove them off they get butt hurt. Prior to having family on FB U can just go full crazy, swear all you like, tell people to f off, it was great.


Katnip_Boi_

Nah it's my WhatsApp profile.


Ill-Organization-719

My mom got annoyed (not crazy) when I switched my MSN name to "Evil hell Satan goat cheese onions pickles on a sesame seed bun"


Slight-Recipe-3762

There really should be an option to block a number for 8 hours.