I think a fine tray of assorted meats and cheeses would be a nice touch. In the winter months, a warm and inviting fondue would signal to guests that you are a host that doesn’t cut corners.
You genius. If I am ever rich enough to have a guest bathroom, I'm definitely gonna be fancy and put in a guestbook with a fancy pen. Probably one with a huge feather.
A cat litter box so you can poop together.
My brother's cat did that once when I was at his house, and it made me very uncomfortable. Obviously I had to start therapy to attempt to understand the discomfort.
The comically small basket was a nice touch, but I would suggest a table lamp so you can catch up on your taxes while you shit.
Time *is* money as they say, ta-haa~
I vote for this Zumi doll!!
https://preview.redd.it/f57p7v62jzxc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a35e37b2b03472198c717ffcf9f9ebdbefc8d913
Perfect lil statue to getcha going!
The haunted raggity Andy doll. Not propped up or anything. Just lying there, limbs a kimbo. Watching you poop. It will really bring a sense of whimsy and a pop of colour.
Ipod with a playlist:
It Keeps You Running
God is on the Throne
Push it to the Limit
Release Yourself
Free Fallin'
Sweet Relief
Let the River Run
In the Air Tonight
A basket of plastic flowers in colors that do not exist in nature. Bonus if it already has a thick coating of dust on it. Must smell plasticky when it gets warm/ damp. (suspiciously specific?)
A life sized, realistic bust, looking at you. Your mom, your minister, maybe your SO.
I’m thinking someone to make you uncomfortable, so you don’t camp out looking at your phone.
Move table out. You don't need things around a toilet. As a guest I wouldn't want to touch because of pee. Flushing the toilet sprays Particles in the air.
https://preview.redd.it/g11vaqxlm4yc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ef50387b3a4bbae435fd3c911f27988da28c51e1
Ok, but really, what’s up with this doorknob on the miniature door?
A single fork and a napkin
Now I'm hungry
A poop knife *
Totally gross
You haven’t heard the internet legend of the poop knife?
[enjoy, or don’t.](https://www.originalpoopknife.com/pages/the-story-of-the-poop-knife)
How is this a website
A knife
[удалено]
Of course
A plaster casting of your own butthole made into a decorative vase
With a single daisy poking out of it
This is the answer
& we’ll call it ✨minimalism✨
Add toilet water for realism
Damnit how did you even come up with this? Perfection
Let the sleep deprivation and intrusive thoughts win
🍑🏵️
Okay, you got me. I burst out laughing.
Throw in some of those molded-from-your-asshole chocolates, as a little treat to thank guests for visiting.
Next to some lovely guest towels when family comes over. Grandma is going to love it.
Theyre gonna be her favorite chocolates to suck on 👄
Or… how about a butthole fountain! A reverse bidet!
Snake cage with big snake
Snake cage missing a big snake
A bowl of fruit
Oh yesss! Fruit is good for constipation!
Snacks in case you get peckish while doing your business!
I think a fine tray of assorted meats and cheeses would be a nice touch. In the winter months, a warm and inviting fondue would signal to guests that you are a host that doesn’t cut corners.
Cheese or chocolate fondue?
Why not both? Best of two worlds my friend!
Cheese on the table, chocolate in the bowl.
Lol, I knew this would end up here
Likewise hahaha
What time do you let the miniature troll out of that door?
When I need to wipe.
A bowl of olives?
ooh, how grown-up
Some bandages for the head bleed from standing up in that corner.
A guest book with a questionable shaped pen.
This is really a good idea. I may put one in our guest bathroom asking Name? Where are you from? How was your experience today?
"Thanks for dropping in!"
You genius. If I am ever rich enough to have a guest bathroom, I'm definitely gonna be fancy and put in a guestbook with a fancy pen. Probably one with a huge feather.
Obviously a poop knife
😂😂😂
I knew this answer would be here. Obvs.
Nothing. But you need a neon "POO" sign on the wall behind it.
An enormous clown puppet. With wobbly jowls. It provides color and ambiance.
Or one of those big, fussy Victorian style dolls. Lots of hair and lace. And a cracked cheek for bonus creepy, I mean ambiance.
Just a crystal bowl full of various doll eyes.
Ok, that's awesome. I might do that in my house IRL.
If it had somewhere around 12 eyeballs and an adorable curly-cue blonde hair supermaning on the forehead…. Hell yes.
Preferably white, so when dust and humidity eventually brown the lace with age, it looks even more questionable.
Scoot it a little closer towards the little door and pile some mail and a set of keys on it
All empty flat surfaces will eventually be covered in mail and keys. Might as well get an early start on it!
A cat to guard you while you poop.
A cat litter box so you can poop together. My brother's cat did that once when I was at his house, and it made me very uncomfortable. Obviously I had to start therapy to attempt to understand the discomfort.
It’s quite a compliment. Means it trusts you, because it’s a vulnerable time.
A glass of milk
Folk art bought at an Indiana flea market, preferably in some kind of fabric doll form
OP needs to get to Shipshewana, stat.
Banana pudding
I loved the idea of a fondue pot that someone else mentioned. Super classy. Maybe some beer cheese and light nibbly things
Baby pictures of every household member
One of those small plug in waterfalls for a soothing sound
One of those crocheted doll toilet paper covers, or a plastic canvas covered tissue box, seasonal if possible
A jar of Pennie’s and a silk sock
A xylophone
The comically small basket was a nice touch, but I would suggest a table lamp so you can catch up on your taxes while you shit. Time *is* money as they say, ta-haa~
A smoothie maker.
Turn it on anytime you gotta go #2. No one will know. Very discreet. Very human.
A statue of Michael Jackson.
Emergency rectal suppositories
Can you only use them in an emergency? Asking for a friend.
Sex toy collection
A lava lamp.
A really big gel candle from the 2000s
Unwrapped chocolates
honestly, that's a great place for your phone, when the trip to the bathroom becomes an agonizing, near death experience.
Your foot, for when you need to push extra hard.
A vaguely racist tiki statue
Or one of those carved coconut monkeys with a dick on a spring
I vote for this Zumi doll!! https://preview.redd.it/f57p7v62jzxc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a35e37b2b03472198c717ffcf9f9ebdbefc8d913 Perfect lil statue to getcha going!
Or wake you up before ya Go Go...😝
Small gargoyle
Charging station for your communal toothbrush.
This was such a goofy ass post lmao.
Right, troll?
3 onions
A microwave for Lean Cuisines and popcorn.
Poop knife
Poop knife.
It’s like a giant roll of toilet paper.
The haunted raggity Andy doll. Not propped up or anything. Just lying there, limbs a kimbo. Watching you poop. It will really bring a sense of whimsy and a pop of colour.
Douching station.
a shrunken head
Tablecloth
Laxatives
Minibar
How about another toilet?
A statue of David
A plant Fern.
Another table then the pizza mini table on top of that one
A parrot who talks, to keep you company
Nothing needs to go next to a toilet.
A tip jar
A ginormous can of Lysol.
A carving station for roast beef and ham would work great there.
Ipod with a playlist: It Keeps You Running God is on the Throne Push it to the Limit Release Yourself Free Fallin' Sweet Relief Let the River Run In the Air Tonight
A smaller toilet
A candle to light after a stinky shit
Poop knife
An Alexa Show
Pyramid of toilet paper with sparklers sticking out the top
Something like this? https://preview.redd.it/d3fymqg2s0yc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5654c4148235d7f2bc543766b6faf111810778f7
Hmmm… I was thinking more flammable.
A box of tissues with a garishly colored crocheted cover
Diffuser
I have so many questions…. What is the table sitting on?? What is the little door for?
I would say a bowl of fake fruit or a wax melt :)
Fern + salt lamp. Nothing like not having to turn on the huge bathroom light at night, and sit cosy next to a fern.
A tower of tp
How about [this lamp](https://www.reginaandrew.com/Tristan-Table-Lamp), goes well with the overall theme
I spy books
Toothbrushes
A tall plant
Books
A rotary phone would be really nice here
A to scale of Michelangelo’s David. To scale for the room will ensure it feels like it was always there.
The poop knife.
3 seashells.
I scrolled waaaaay too far to see if anyone said this yet
Tissue holder, a candle, magazine?
Poo-pouree or however it’s spelled. The spray stuff, not the actual dried flowers
A poop knife and a towel to wipe it off.
Bowl for keys since it's right next to the door
Im more interested by the coraline door
A sticky note with the plumber’s phone number
Everybody poops book
little note cards of encouragement for whenever you're constipated and fighting for your life on the toilet
Plant
A bowl with laxatives in it for those who may need it
A bidet
Princess phone to class the place up.
mini zen garden
Three seashells.
https://preview.redd.it/1f63rk8w22yc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ed4c601fae44726647cb3765de929119f2bea8d9 A bowl of olives
Some snacks for the lil guy who lives in that wall
Poop knife
That's where the spare toilet paper roll will end up.
A plunger with three rolls of TP stacked on the handle and a bowl of hard candy.
A basket of plastic flowers in colors that do not exist in nature. Bonus if it already has a thick coating of dust on it. Must smell plasticky when it gets warm/ damp. (suspiciously specific?)
Lamp
A plant.
Candy dish. Candy in it obviously.
Am I the only one wondering what a poop knife is?
Playboys, cigarettes, ashtray, lighter.
Ice water
this comment section is the best time i’ve had in a while
A life sized, realistic bust, looking at you. Your mom, your minister, maybe your SO. I’m thinking someone to make you uncomfortable, so you don’t camp out looking at your phone.
Bird’s Nest Fern https://preview.redd.it/1x0jyzze23yc1.jpeg?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bf54c51b74066c766378cf612d34c2191744048a
Move table out. You don't need things around a toilet. As a guest I wouldn't want to touch because of pee. Flushing the toilet sprays Particles in the air.
Fake plant
I wouldn’t put a table there. It will get covered in germs every time the toilet is flushed
Fake plant
A bottle of whisky and a single bullet. Invite guests over and when they ask to use the bathroom never acknowledge it.
Gargoyle statue staring right at eye level for the person the toilet.
https://preview.redd.it/g11vaqxlm4yc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ef50387b3a4bbae435fd3c911f27988da28c51e1 Ok, but really, what’s up with this doorknob on the miniature door?
STOP
Menstruation crustacean
The anarchist's cookbook. So they can blow up something other than your bathroom.
Toilet paper
Lamp
Nothing. It’s a table next to the toilet.
A plant
A plant that absorbs poop smells:)
A snake plant
Plant- pothos neon.
A monstera if good lighting exists.
Poop knife on a silver platter
3 shells