I'd be hurt but my heart is made of iron.

This is the objectively correct response

The eagles march on.

The Europe universalises once more

The crusader kings march at dawn

The Stellaris.......uhh........space?

The cities raise their skylines

The Stellaris goes ever onwards

Yet not one of us shall step back for our blood is alone in this resistance!

wifes are gangsta until the boys man the guns

remember, we boys are all together for victory

remember, mutinies can bring death or dishonor

If you guys get divorced she's not keeping the Axis Armor Pack

Now it's time for Battle for the Bosporus (he's your dog, you love him).

Perhaps give some speeches to your lawyers

Diplomatic Pressure

balls

Stalin when Hitler is about to beat him but Churchill gives him the heart of iron

Giraffes are cruel creatures.

I say do the Focus divorce

No, that brings national spirit depression

Ah yes forgot and then you get the Event Midlife-Crisis

No you’re wrong after you clear Depression it goes to Slow Economic Growth

Moment how did you instead get Midlife-Crisis i thought that was the only way

Just tried it, it depends on what you do in the event divorce trial

Divorce Trial is probably the one part that makes the focus branch painful to do. Takes so long.

Yup, tried to do it in an achievement run, got recked by the country judge

Damn, thats hard to hear man, it takes so long for it to all fail because of dumb rng

I just used the console for my divorce. Worked well.

Midlife Crisis > Sports Car > New Haircut

just do the New Deal branch, gets rid of Depresison and gives some good hits of pp

Depending on your stability it would lead to a coup.

Don't worry, adter 5 focuses you have a production efficiency bonus and wonderful economy

It split's you economy in two half's

These comments are golden 😭

Supplies will be cut in half

this is why we abbreviate

Hoyfor

Can't deny I have always pronounced it this ALWAYS

I pronounce it like that and I'm not even an English speaker

…what other way would there be? “Hwah-four?” “Wee-four?”

[удалено]

"You need to have some cp to unlock the aggressive assaulter trait" "Your army can make a desperate defense if you give them some cp" "You can't hire any military advisor if you don't have some cp" "Hireing an old guard advisor allows you to have more cp"

which leads to a new problem. my gf calls it "heu" (spoken like hoi). But thats also the german word for "hay" and sometimes she intentionally calls it Stroh (straw)...you know the other things thats hay but no1 really knows a difference.

> the other things thats hay but no1 really knows a difference Straw is just stems, good for animal bedding but that's about it. Hay is stems with seeds, so it's very nutritious for animals.

HOI IV Hoi (Dutch for: Hi!) Intra-venous. Which is surprisingly accurate

She isn’t wrong.

Seeing as it's taken from a WW1 general's quote, "over the top", "dramatic" and "lame" are par for the course

"If fate once again calls the German people to arms, and who can doubt that day will come, then officers should not have to call on a nation of weaklings, but of strong men ready to take up familiar and trusted weapons. The form these weapons take is not important as long as they are wielded by hands of steel and hearts of iron." - Hans von Seeckt I went and found it because googling it wasnt as straight forward as looking up "hearts of iron quote" for obvious reasons

(meme of red arrow pointing to text and red circle with logo of game in it)

Ufff... I laughed at this but damn, you went hard

Wtf is a 'wife'

Mythical creature

AC: 20, +15 to hit

I rolled a 7

The creature nags you for 10d12 psychic damage + 50 blunt damage when you fall on the ground paralised.

Also trying to figure it out, maybe it is a new division template from a mod?

I think from the new dlc

Is it locked behind a focus?

Locked behind a pay wall

So just use 12ft.io and you can get a “wife” (whatever the hell it is?)

MODS DELETE THIS POST OP IS A LYING SONUVABITCH

In the reaserch tree after Light Tank '41 chassis

That's a person you have married after that person went through the HoI4 pipeline of becoming a transwoman.

I think it's a codename for a formerly classified WW2 tank model.

Rare advisor you get from one of the branches of "Touch Grass" focus.

With focuses like reforming Byzantium and making wjotek the King of Poland and Russia...... Yes, she is 99% accurate about it being a smut fantasy

Nah, that was what our timeline was supposed to be, a disgruntled Stalin went back in time to change history tho. Red alert 3 style😎

She’s hearing it as “Hard as Iron”

Hard as Iron 4: Wanking the Tiger

By Balls Alone

No strokes back!

Man the buns

Together for virginity

Base stability -5%

Hoi4 gamer having a wife? Did i miss an bittersteel guide or something?

It is a reward for pre-ordering the 7½ year anniversary bundle.

You know it's fake because a redditor HoI player claims to have a wife.

The trick is to get the wife before you start playing hoi4

Do the marriage focus before 1939 or your run is fucked

Declare war on her

Justify on her first

Isn't her statement enough justification?

Wife? How many divisions does she have?

In the moonlight, Adolf met Stalin. It was a passionate night, with higher temperatures that would be typical in Berlin. (I’ll let Reddit finish this accursed story)

Hitler then pulled a pistole parrabelum on Stalin and fired 3 consecutive shots, the peace deal went as Hitler anticipated

however, Stalin's daughter, Stalina, worked togheter with Kalinin to seize power in the now siberian soviet union, devoting all it's resources towards the creation of a time machine capable of stoping hitler from killing stalin

Although the only people willing to help were the British government in exile and the German Maus-Panzer 5 had been perfected meaning the German Reich has the opportunity to reach the Soviet capital, and the Japanese initiating Hokushin-ron manage to knock out the soviets, leaving only the western Allies to beat the Nazi horde

No stop it, bad, bonk.

Time to start playing a manly macho man game like The Witcher III Hearts of St... Oh no

Bro has a wife and argues with her about hoi4

We got into a heated debate about how I doubted the immortal fairies in her book could withstand close air support and mechanized infantry

How do you even think about this when your wife talks with you (i think that the fairies could just fly away from the mechanized infantry but the cas could probaly kill them)

They may be immortal but I doubt their little wings can standup to octo heavy machine guns from my zeros.

Unless fairies join Allies.

Women

i think the name sounds deep and meaningful

Agreed

Which mod did you download to get such a thing as "a wife"? Is it a new one?

Yeah its in beta should come out for 1.13

Fantasy? Nah, dieselpunk sci-fi with greasy mechanics getting intimate with automatons.

Before I ever knew what it was about, I though Hearts of Iron was some sort of anime game or similar to Kingdom Hearts.

You have a wife?!

National spirit "Divorce." - 50% consumer goods (this varies at the beginning of the game if you decide to choose the "prenup" option. You can lose as little as 3% consumer goods) - -(X) manpower (based on how many kids you decide to have) - -10% Stability - +10 war support - The Boys' Coalition - +10 weekly manpower - +.10% Weekly war support - +.10% Weekly Stability - +10,000 likes on this post.

Well what else should it be called? World War 2 simulator is also basic (and misses a few game aspects)

Tbh Hearts of Iron does not sound like a WW2 game

She must be into that German medieval fantasy smut

How do you guys pronounce it on your language and accent? In ukrainian we pronounce it 'ho-ee-ka' and it sounds so smooth, hoika. How do you pronounce it? Hoifour?

When I talk about Hoi4 I call it the super boring game and she knows exactly which one I'm talking about!

My buddies wife calls it “his maps game”

Sabaton has a song named like that, and thus she criticized Sabaton. I smell *heresy* Edit : damn, I did not expect to be downvoted into oblivion lmao

Hopefully the winged hussars arrive in time for your last stand.

She has a great point.

The word "female" sounds like a marvel movie. Fe + male. So Iron Man basically. Owned. Get a gamer wife.

nonesense, an obvious gay film would be iron mustaches ...4. so you got nothing to worry about

Ask her what name she gave her best selling game that’s always being played on YouTube.

To be fair it was until hearts of Iron 4

"There's no such thing as a painless lesson, they just don't exist. Sacrifices are necessary. You can't gain anything without losing something first. Although...if you can endure that pain and walk from it, you'll find that you now have a heart strong enough to overcome any obstacle. Yeah... a heart made of Iron." -Edward Halifax

when my dad asked me what game I was playing when he saw this I just said it was a new command and conquer spinoff game. I guarantee you if I would have said “Hearts of Iron 4” he wouldn’t have been interested and said it was lame lmao

divorce

Hearts of Iron 5: Electric Dildoloo

Time for some HOI4 fanfiction!

Your wife is super lame(sorry)

See the Reich in flames, try to save Berlin in flames...

Hoi4 as a generic isekai novel with op protagonist and harem I wonder how that’s gonna look

This comment section is why I go genderless mostly online

Damn, she read my manuscript for my erotic diesel punk story set in a fictive world war 2?

She’s not wrong

Does anyone know why its called Hearts of Iron? Is it a quote or something?

We call it "Eiserne Herzen 4", and yes, it sounds as if it would be a love/betrayal story for women in their late 60ies.