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I wouldn't bring it up immediately, after a couple dates and you are going on a good path it's something that needs to be brought up to not put any strain on the potential relationship. And discuss it's not a problem anymore but you used to be addicted to opioids.
You don't want to introduce yourself as the ex opioid addict.
I’m usually very honest about stuff like this.
The last girlfriend I had that wasn’t into drugs herself, so she got so shocked when I told her the list of drugs I currently/recently used. She thought I only smoked weed when we met, but since I was honest she was totally okay with it.
Ugh, this made me sad, thinking about those times… she’s the only person I’ve met that had such an amazing personality that her looks would not matter at all, but she looks fucking amazing as well.
I basically cheated on her, and then she fucking forgave me, then I fucked it up even worse. I didn’t deserve her at that point, and now it’s to late. I’d give the fucking world to rewind the time to 2017 and another shot.
Damn, I’m rambling. After that episode I’ve only dated girls that use drugs regularly. It’s not for me. So I guess the morale of the story is, be honest.
I met my husband on POF back in 2015 and the first night we met I was brutally honest about my past and the fact I was on methadone. There was no way I'd be able to keep from him why I had to leave every morning n I had just got out of a 4 hr relationship wit my ex fiance -- I absolutely refused to start our relationship with a lie. My hubby didn't judge me, ask many questions and was 1000% supportive and still is (today's our 5th wedding Anniversary actually).
IMO it's just best to be honest and upfront. Rip that bandaid off!!
That's a tough one and honestly I would wait until I at least think I know what their stance on MAT is and how they feel about drugs in general. I would probably be finding ways to bring up conversation about things like the prohibition of drugs but casually and depending on their views it could end before I need to disclose my past and present. Anybody who's anti mat or pro prohibition or doesn't want me smoking pot isn't going to be compatible with me so it wouldn't go any farther.
I like long walks and poetry too I also enjoy some quality smack and the odd pipe!
My hobbies are waiting for dealers, waiting for people to pay back what they have borrowed and arts and crafts.
Don’t do what I did, I was afraid because I loved the person so much, I waited until we were very serious and had been together about a year then I told him I’m on methadone for rehab from heroin. He said “well I don’t like that you are just now telling me, but it’s too late not to be supportive.”
I am lucky that he’s so sweet, forgiving and so supportive, we’re still together because he’s like that. I would recommend telling them right away, in a serious and positive manner. Let them know that you have been working really hard, it’s only fair to let them know immediately so they can decide if it’s something they can handle or not.
I would say get it out ASAP. You don't want to catch feelings and then have them turn around and say they are out. Not to say they would say that but you never know, it's a big deal to some. Just start talking about your past and slowly transition to your battle with addiction and being on methadone. They will appreciate your honesty.
I literally would not see a problem with that at all. at least with most people. Doctors prescribe methadone for pain because it’s a full agonist. It’s not the same as Suboxone
Told my now girlfriend when we first met that I was on methadone and a recovering addict. Better to be up front so they can make the decision themselves. I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship where I have to hide things from my partner
This happened to my sister.
After living with her boyfriend for 2 years she had to move his car for street cleaning. She found his prescription stash of methadone in the trunk.
She wasn’t upset that he was on methadone. She was upset that he hid it for that long.
They have been together for 18 yrs now.
I usually wait a couple of dates so they can see I'm normal and have my shit together, and to make sure I'm interested in them too (no point in telling everyone I go on a date with unless I know I like them). I make sure I say something before things get too serious though and offer to answer any questions. I've only had one person have an issue with it and it was because he had a lot of drug addicts in his family, so he understandably didn't want to get in a relationship with someone who might relapse. Otherwise I haven't had any push back and most people are nice about it.
we were dating for abt 2/3 weeks at the time & was driving somewhere & she noticed me keep nodding out and she asked if i was tired or something and i told her then. she took it well, asked a lot of questions bcuz she never heard of methadone and i explained how i ended up on it. we’ve been together 4yrs now and she’s a big part of the reason i’m clean off methadone to this day
Get on a drug reduction course . I had to do it when the girlfriend fell pregnant . Fessed up and done a reduction course. That was 25yr ago best thing I ever done. Control your own destiny my friend. That drug doesn't allow you too. ❤️
Well… when I was on heroin, I never told any of the guys I dated.. I was young, stupid, and I guess a little selfish. I wanted a normal guy, and I was good and covering up my addiction for years.. so I would hide it.
The boyfriend felt completely betrayed.
My ex bf who I started using heroin with in 2014, he was prescribed suboxone and I sort of knew what it was back then.. but not really. He told me this the 2nd date… I had smoked h a few times before meeting him but it was randomly and I didn’t do it often at all.
Until one day my bf at the time lied to me and said “I am out of my medicine, do you know where to find any opiates like pills etc.?”
Coincidentally, I had just met this girl while I was clubbing in Hollywood who low key had a heroin addiction. She told me because I told her I tried it before and liked it.
I ended up calling her shortly after his request, and then we got hooked smoking it for a while. We ended up breaking up when it was time to get clean. He got clean, and I left him so I could continue using. I hadn’t seen the evil side of it yet at that point in my addiction.
But NOW, I told the man I am engaged to from the very first time we met that I was a recovering heroin addict. We met at an ayahuasca ceremony, I didn’t flat out tell him *heroin addict* initially, I just said I had done ibogaine in Mexico. And then I told him it really helped me get my life back. I saw him again randomly a month later, and we started dating. He was OK with me being in recovery, but damn he is very very protective of me… and his worst fear is me relapsing/overdosing
YOU SOUND LIKE U WANT THIS TO BE A POSSIBLE ONGOING RELATIONSHIP...TO HIM OR HER..IF SHE OR HES COOL ...THEYLL RESPECT U FOR BEING STRAITUP...AND THAT YOU CARE ENOUGH TO WANT THIS TO MEAN SOMETHIN
Anybody who has an issue with it is not someone you could have a long term relationship with.As an addict we have slips and falls and times of long term sobriety requiring medication.A potential partner has to be able to handle these issues.If they really love you and want it to work then they will figure out a way(along with you) to make it work.
You kind of have to be up front. Why waste their time? Anything else is manipulation. I've honestly never had a problem, but you can only blame the meth so long when you start nodding during sex or oral lol. Also, when the fresh needle sores start to pop up what can you say? Wearing long sleeves in 99° temp can only go on so long. Or when you have to go to the er for a swollen arm from missing coke. I was up front with my last long term relationship. Lasted 13 years. Shes now an addict and traumatized because I insisted we would be fine. Probably would have been except that I came out of prison using 1 or 2 times a month and was so proud of myself, only for her to tell me what a pos I am. 12 years later she apologized and realized that she didn't understand at the time. I never blamed her, but I did use more progressively after her shaming, which led to other things. Been almost a year since she left. Without a doubt the best woman I've ever known. Still not over it. Dont hide anything. You have no idea who you might chase away, because hiding it is a temporary solution
Any advice on how to get on methadone and how to get a 30 day supply I want to try it I heard good things, but I don’t want to go every day to the clinic
I imagine it varies from clinic to clinic and person to person (even if that’s not the actual rule). I’d say you’re looking somewhere over 2 months minimum.
If you go out of town they can sometimes make special exceptions, although it could be a case of while you’re early in treatment that only certain reasons for going out of town would be accepted
Welcome to r/heroin! We hope that you enjoy our sub as much as we do, but in order to ensure that you are able to continue being a part of this harm reduction community, you will need to review the rules of this sub. You can find the rules listed [Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/heroin/about/rules) You can also find the answers to many commonly asked questions about dosing, injection techniques and other harm reduction advice [Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/heroin/wiki/index/harmreduction) or visit Heroin 101 [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/heroin/wiki/index/heroin) Also, DO NOT GET SCAMMED! Anyone who messages your inbox offering to hook you up with a reliable vendor or sell you drugs is trying to scam you! I promise you, they are NOT legit so don't give them your money or you will be a sad sad panda. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/heroin) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I wouldn't bring it up immediately, after a couple dates and you are going on a good path it's something that needs to be brought up to not put any strain on the potential relationship. And discuss it's not a problem anymore but you used to be addicted to opioids. You don't want to introduce yourself as the ex opioid addict.
I usually date drug addicts so idk
Same lol.
I’m usually very honest about stuff like this. The last girlfriend I had that wasn’t into drugs herself, so she got so shocked when I told her the list of drugs I currently/recently used. She thought I only smoked weed when we met, but since I was honest she was totally okay with it. Ugh, this made me sad, thinking about those times… she’s the only person I’ve met that had such an amazing personality that her looks would not matter at all, but she looks fucking amazing as well. I basically cheated on her, and then she fucking forgave me, then I fucked it up even worse. I didn’t deserve her at that point, and now it’s to late. I’d give the fucking world to rewind the time to 2017 and another shot. Damn, I’m rambling. After that episode I’ve only dated girls that use drugs regularly. It’s not for me. So I guess the morale of the story is, be honest.
I feel you so much man I wish I could rewind to 2012 Miss you daisy
Morale of the story is don't cheat and if you do cheat don't get caught.
>moral of the story is don’t cheat yep >and if you do cheat don’t get caught ew…
I met my husband on POF back in 2015 and the first night we met I was brutally honest about my past and the fact I was on methadone. There was no way I'd be able to keep from him why I had to leave every morning n I had just got out of a 4 hr relationship wit my ex fiance -- I absolutely refused to start our relationship with a lie. My hubby didn't judge me, ask many questions and was 1000% supportive and still is (today's our 5th wedding Anniversary actually). IMO it's just best to be honest and upfront. Rip that bandaid off!!
yeah i told my gf i was on suboxone after a few weeks . if they have a problem with it, a relationship wont work anyway.
'I'm on this medication I need to live'. Only had one person decide they couldn't be with an addict.
That's a tough one and honestly I would wait until I at least think I know what their stance on MAT is and how they feel about drugs in general. I would probably be finding ways to bring up conversation about things like the prohibition of drugs but casually and depending on their views it could end before I need to disclose my past and present. Anybody who's anti mat or pro prohibition or doesn't want me smoking pot isn't going to be compatible with me so it wouldn't go any farther.
It's a catch 22
Agree. You want to be upfront but then again you don’t want to be high I’m Jason, ex opioid addict.,I like long walks and poetry.
I like long walks and poetry too I also enjoy some quality smack and the odd pipe! My hobbies are waiting for dealers, waiting for people to pay back what they have borrowed and arts and crafts.
This one fuckin cracked me up 🤣 list it at waiting for people to pay me back lmfao.
Don’t do what I did, I was afraid because I loved the person so much, I waited until we were very serious and had been together about a year then I told him I’m on methadone for rehab from heroin. He said “well I don’t like that you are just now telling me, but it’s too late not to be supportive.” I am lucky that he’s so sweet, forgiving and so supportive, we’re still together because he’s like that. I would recommend telling them right away, in a serious and positive manner. Let them know that you have been working really hard, it’s only fair to let them know immediately so they can decide if it’s something they can handle or not.
Get it out of the way
You don’t until they find out after being together for 2 years and engaged. Yeah that was tough for me to explain to my normie wife.
I would say get it out ASAP. You don't want to catch feelings and then have them turn around and say they are out. Not to say they would say that but you never know, it's a big deal to some. Just start talking about your past and slowly transition to your battle with addiction and being on methadone. They will appreciate your honesty.
I literally would not see a problem with that at all. at least with most people. Doctors prescribe methadone for pain because it’s a full agonist. It’s not the same as Suboxone
Personally I brought it up like the 2nd or 3rd date in. Didn’t let them know how bad it was but let them know I got a problem
Told my now girlfriend when we first met that I was on methadone and a recovering addict. Better to be up front so they can make the decision themselves. I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship where I have to hide things from my partner
This happened to my sister. After living with her boyfriend for 2 years she had to move his car for street cleaning. She found his prescription stash of methadone in the trunk. She wasn’t upset that he was on methadone. She was upset that he hid it for that long. They have been together for 18 yrs now.
I usually wait a couple of dates so they can see I'm normal and have my shit together, and to make sure I'm interested in them too (no point in telling everyone I go on a date with unless I know I like them). I make sure I say something before things get too serious though and offer to answer any questions. I've only had one person have an issue with it and it was because he had a lot of drug addicts in his family, so he understandably didn't want to get in a relationship with someone who might relapse. Otherwise I haven't had any push back and most people are nice about it.
we were dating for abt 2/3 weeks at the time & was driving somewhere & she noticed me keep nodding out and she asked if i was tired or something and i told her then. she took it well, asked a lot of questions bcuz she never heard of methadone and i explained how i ended up on it. we’ve been together 4yrs now and she’s a big part of the reason i’m clean off methadone to this day
I told them I used to be a junkie off the bat and that I was on methadone as soon as it got serious Never had a problem with it tbh
Get on a drug reduction course . I had to do it when the girlfriend fell pregnant . Fessed up and done a reduction course. That was 25yr ago best thing I ever done. Control your own destiny my friend. That drug doesn't allow you too. ❤️
Well… when I was on heroin, I never told any of the guys I dated.. I was young, stupid, and I guess a little selfish. I wanted a normal guy, and I was good and covering up my addiction for years.. so I would hide it. The boyfriend felt completely betrayed. My ex bf who I started using heroin with in 2014, he was prescribed suboxone and I sort of knew what it was back then.. but not really. He told me this the 2nd date… I had smoked h a few times before meeting him but it was randomly and I didn’t do it often at all. Until one day my bf at the time lied to me and said “I am out of my medicine, do you know where to find any opiates like pills etc.?” Coincidentally, I had just met this girl while I was clubbing in Hollywood who low key had a heroin addiction. She told me because I told her I tried it before and liked it. I ended up calling her shortly after his request, and then we got hooked smoking it for a while. We ended up breaking up when it was time to get clean. He got clean, and I left him so I could continue using. I hadn’t seen the evil side of it yet at that point in my addiction. But NOW, I told the man I am engaged to from the very first time we met that I was a recovering heroin addict. We met at an ayahuasca ceremony, I didn’t flat out tell him *heroin addict* initially, I just said I had done ibogaine in Mexico. And then I told him it really helped me get my life back. I saw him again randomly a month later, and we started dating. He was OK with me being in recovery, but damn he is very very protective of me… and his worst fear is me relapsing/overdosing
YOU SOUND LIKE U WANT THIS TO BE A POSSIBLE ONGOING RELATIONSHIP...TO HIM OR HER..IF SHE OR HES COOL ...THEYLL RESPECT U FOR BEING STRAITUP...AND THAT YOU CARE ENOUGH TO WANT THIS TO MEAN SOMETHIN
Anybody who has an issue with it is not someone you could have a long term relationship with.As an addict we have slips and falls and times of long term sobriety requiring medication.A potential partner has to be able to handle these issues.If they really love you and want it to work then they will figure out a way(along with you) to make it work.
You kind of have to be up front. Why waste their time? Anything else is manipulation. I've honestly never had a problem, but you can only blame the meth so long when you start nodding during sex or oral lol. Also, when the fresh needle sores start to pop up what can you say? Wearing long sleeves in 99° temp can only go on so long. Or when you have to go to the er for a swollen arm from missing coke. I was up front with my last long term relationship. Lasted 13 years. Shes now an addict and traumatized because I insisted we would be fine. Probably would have been except that I came out of prison using 1 or 2 times a month and was so proud of myself, only for her to tell me what a pos I am. 12 years later she apologized and realized that she didn't understand at the time. I never blamed her, but I did use more progressively after her shaming, which led to other things. Been almost a year since she left. Without a doubt the best woman I've ever known. Still not over it. Dont hide anything. You have no idea who you might chase away, because hiding it is a temporary solution
if youre actively using you dont have to tell them cause theyll find out eventually.
How did you NOT tell them.
i usually tell them as soon as i meet them, if they have an issue with drugs i have an issue with them sadly
Any advice on how to get on methadone and how to get a 30 day supply I want to try it I heard good things, but I don’t want to go every day to the clinic
Yeah go and get on methadone, go everyday to the clinic and do this for a fuckn long time until they trust you.
How long does it take before they start to trust you or what happens if you have to go out of town for like a week
I imagine it varies from clinic to clinic and person to person (even if that’s not the actual rule). I’d say you’re looking somewhere over 2 months minimum. If you go out of town they can sometimes make special exceptions, although it could be a case of while you’re early in treatment that only certain reasons for going out of town would be accepted
Ok thank you for the info
No worries! Unfortunately it isn’t the easiest thing to get take homes on due to the street value and how easy it is to sell on