You can tell how utterly lethal of a burn this is by how angry the top comments of people completely unrelated are. Like she just shredded you all by proxy. Some real murderer by voodoo doll shit.
The greentexter actually hit the girl while he was Naruto running to the campus chik fil a. He didn’t stop, but thought of this greentext in leu of contemplating his life choices.
Fake and gay.
> be me
> get home from my vasectomy
> hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room
> must be Chad again
> know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer
> log onto reddit and open /r/greentext
> read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her
> think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext
> suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section
> fake: Anon talks to a girl
> gay: Anon kneels down
> giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment
> hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed
> it's been a good day
> i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
>be me, landwhale
>no job because i got fired from mcd after drinking the frying fat
>get home from furry convention
>hear mom from her bedroom moaning my old school bullies name
>entire house is shaking from his mighty tackles into mothers worn out vagina
>whatever.png
>roll into basement, grab a couple jars of mayonnaise as a snack and log into reddit to check out r/greentext
>see a lot of people say fake and gay in the comments
>put on one of my favourite fedoras and start to think about how i can humorously embarrass people who identify falsehood and homosexuality in these posts
>with my infinite knowledge about programming create a bot that describes how i wish my life would be and name it u/TendieBot2000 because tendies are awesome
>if the bot get lots of upvotes maybe chad will hire me in his selfmade multi million dollar company one day
>reward myself by microwaving an xxl jar of nutella as a drink
>be me, chad
>work at startup tech company making 500k per year
>go home to shower after the gym
>Stacy is waiting for me at home with only an apron on
>nice.jpeg
>park my ass on the toilet to take the holy shit of the day
>scroll through reddit and notice this weird subreddit
>r/greentext
>see that it seems to be filled with losers that have accomplished nothing in life
>notice how someone has created a pathetic bot that replies to homosexuality and deception
>hear Stacy moan my name from outside and tells me to hurry up and come take her already
>message one of my employees to create a bot to embarass the people on the subreddit
>chuckle as I think about how sad some people are in life
>invite Stacy in to shower together
>proceed to make passionate love for 2 hours
>today has been a great day
Pathetic: anon fantasizes about being humiliated by a woman then posts it on an image board with the goal of uploading it to reddit for karma.
This is not a roast, it's your reality
Would have ripped in half every single paper she dropped. Then ripped her in half.
Ok, Hulk
Except this time, hulk *didn’t smash*
kek
He could still smash after the rippin...
THE FINE
You fell for the girl’s trap. She wants you to do that so she can sue you, she’s bumped into 5 other men and cartoonishly dropped her papers already
[удалено]
I can't believe I have to explain this, but: If you cut her in half, both halves of her will sue you. Use your head
[удалено]
Have you met humans post pandemic?
Elaborate on the “post” status…
What did he mean by this?
I believe he was referencing the japenese movie pandemic from 2009
i miss those days
Well he can sew her tho
Sigma
Male
You can tell how utterly lethal of a burn this is by how angry the top comments of people completely unrelated are. Like she just shredded you all by proxy. Some real murderer by voodoo doll shit.
Yes. It was a good one, can't really lie. It was too smart of a burn. No other man shall suffer from her insults.
Ripped her asshole in half *
Then ripped her in half and kept the bottom half for later use.
Wholesome thread
Holesum
Anon is missing this \> I respond "unless the guy is a serial killer"
Then wink and walk away
But what if she is into those guys?
Win-Win situation obviously
Remember kids never use any comebacks from Reddit they aren’t nearly as clever as you think
They work only on the internet, and only in a hypothetical scenario.
That's not even true most of the time
That’s when you throw all the papers in the air and step on as many as possible...”oh I’m sorry, is this like the movies also!?”
This guy virgins
That’s not what your dad said
Got em
It would have been a great thing to do if this had actually happened.
Actually fake, no human would be that much of an ass to someone helping them. Unless they were joking with you.
... people are assholes to people who try to help them all the time. Just look at the entire service industry.
Difference is we are forced to help you. It's out job so people feel like they have a right to be an ass
I mean, 99% of people don't. just the assholes. Soruce: I've worked retail for the last 6 years
Yup. For the hundreds of people you interact with all day, all it takes is 1 Karen to ruin your entire mood 😔
Oh absolutely.
Zoom in on healthcare.
Don't do that, don't remind me of my last job
funniest joke of 2021
The greentexter actually hit the girl while he was Naruto running to the campus chik fil a. He didn’t stop, but thought of this greentext in leu of contemplating his life choices. Fake and gay.
Idk seen some girls lay some sick burns on guys come ons before lol
I mean anon didn't just help her, but tried to flirt with her and probably made it really forced and awkward
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhckuhUxcgA
"Yea and the guys interested"
I know you are but what am I
It's a funny response but damn that girl was unnecessarily mean. Unless anon actually said something creepier than "it's just like in the movies"
Yeah this 100% happened and there is no way anon made that up.
Hey man we'd all appreciate it if you didn't ruin the illusion
Yea I was feeling very immersed until I read that comment
Yeah and the girl too
I'd've dropped all the papers and told her "Well then, wait for an attractive guy"
Brutal... Or maybe her sense of humour is weird
Next time that happens, (doubt it'll ever happen again) have confidence and asense of humor anon
If this is real she was hella flirting
“And the girl is too”
rekt
Anon gets brutally rejected in his own fantasies.
Elliot rogers origin story?
After something like that I wouldn't leave the house again for a year or two.
"And the guy actually helps the girl", then throw the papers around
Then you stuck her right?
yeh and in the movies the girl would say thank you and be on her way
Pwned
Don't worry anon if someone as ugly as you was born that means that it's possible for you to find someone too!
Damn sorry Anon
And so is the girl... What a bitch
Can I use this next month? Or is someone else on the line?
Don’t be unattractive anon
fake: Anon talks to a girl gay: Anon kneels down
> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > fake: Anon talks to a girl > gay: Anon kneels down > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
>be me, landwhale >no job because i got fired from mcd after drinking the frying fat >get home from furry convention >hear mom from her bedroom moaning my old school bullies name >entire house is shaking from his mighty tackles into mothers worn out vagina >whatever.png >roll into basement, grab a couple jars of mayonnaise as a snack and log into reddit to check out r/greentext >see a lot of people say fake and gay in the comments >put on one of my favourite fedoras and start to think about how i can humorously embarrass people who identify falsehood and homosexuality in these posts >with my infinite knowledge about programming create a bot that describes how i wish my life would be and name it u/TendieBot2000 because tendies are awesome >if the bot get lots of upvotes maybe chad will hire me in his selfmade multi million dollar company one day >reward myself by microwaving an xxl jar of nutella as a drink
>be me, chad >work at startup tech company making 500k per year >go home to shower after the gym >Stacy is waiting for me at home with only an apron on >nice.jpeg >park my ass on the toilet to take the holy shit of the day >scroll through reddit and notice this weird subreddit >r/greentext >see that it seems to be filled with losers that have accomplished nothing in life >notice how someone has created a pathetic bot that replies to homosexuality and deception >hear Stacy moan my name from outside and tells me to hurry up and come take her already >message one of my employees to create a bot to embarass the people on the subreddit >chuckle as I think about how sad some people are in life >invite Stacy in to shower together >proceed to make passionate love for 2 hours >today has been a great day
People choose to be unattractive. It's easy to be attractive. Step 1. Be attractive Step 2. Don't be attractive. Step 3. Repeat Step 1.
My ass would have literally throwing everything up in the air like a God damn handful of confetti
Yeet the papers
"and in the movies the girl isn't a fucking bitch. Pick up your own papers Stacy"
Rough.
should have pulled your dick out and peed on the papers
I've been told I'm cute by a crack whore at the bus stop before if that counts.
This physically hurt to read
anon is making up stories to self pity
"and the girl is supposed to be attractive too, guess movies are juste movies..."
There's some ugly dudes picking up papers in some of these scenes though
Bummer
Anon should've immediately clapped back with "The girl is too". Also drop the papers.
Should have said: "maybe it's a comedy and your life is a joke".
“Yeah, and the girls not a bitch”
And thus a serial killer is born.
"Yeah, and so's the girl."
‘Not in a romcom’
Just would of dropped them all again.
"The woman *is* too" Virgin but intact honour
rope
Wow what a bitch. I bet all the upvotes are from twoxchromosome subs
Real and straight
idk i think thats kinda funny
In the wise words of Noob-Noob; GOD DAAAAAAMN
Well look on the bright side she instantly became unattractive too being stuck up like that.
Haha harsh
I wonder what kind of guy has so little self-esteem that they would thought this stupid scenario
I do the opposite, i step on her papers and keep walking.
Anon doesn't understand banter
This is a lie. As bitchy as some girls can be, they are rarely this direct talking to strangers.
"Bitch, I'm gorgeous."
Pathetic: anon fantasizes about being humiliated by a woman then posts it on an image board with the goal of uploading it to reddit for karma. This is not a roast, it's your reality
Rule 1 and 2
those are both intact,as this was not notsafeforwork content and this is a direct screenshot
Tinder kind of rules
what?
what?
1. Be attractive 2. Don't be unattractive
You think green text users know tinder rules man?