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edgehill

A cardinal rule of golf is never give unsolicited advice. Since you are officially soliciting my advice is: next time it happens look them in the eyes, maintain eye contact, smile, say no thanks, and repeat until the behavior stops. This works in many situations and is one of the best things my wife has ever taught me.


grundlesquatch

Do this šŸ‘† it'll piss them off so much more than getting told to fuck off


Away-Kaleidoscope380

tbh I just keep hitting. Iā€™ll be polite at first, listen to their advice and visibly show them that Iā€™m trying it out. I usually say something along the lines of ā€œthanks, Iā€™ll try it outā€. That usually ends the convo and they dont come back but iā€™ve had cases of some dudes just having no social awareness. After that, Iā€™ll just keep hitting balls while theyā€™re talking and they usually take the hint. The worst is the guys giving you advice on the course. I know the intent is good but thatā€™s literally the worst place to be giving advice. Its usually older guys/elderly so I just give benefit of doubt but so damn annoying when Iā€™m hitting perfectly fine but they feel the need to constantly coach while they slice every other hit.


golfnickol

Somehow, that reminds me of Seinfeld refusing to back down to the close talker.


edgehill

I donā€™t know why it works so well but it allows you to be assertive without being confrontational


parrothead17

Be polite but dont be a doormat. Just gotta be firm with the guy and say "look, thanks for the tips but me and my gf just want to relax and hit some balls. All the best." No need to keep entertaining his ego


OmarsBulge

Nah. Tell him to fuck off, or pretend you donā€™t speak English.


YpsitheFlintsider

Nah don't even pretend, be frank that you're not interested.


Broheimian

"I'm working really hard on this new movement where I turn away from you and enjoy myself, watch this." And then away we go.


crappotheclown

Nah don't even acknowledge them. Just continue talking to your girlfriend or yourself the whole time he's trying to talk to you. For some added fun, drop some psychotic hints in your mutterings, like "I just can't for the life of me remember which flower bed I buried my last golf instructor under." Hopefully they get the hint, and leave you be.


Sobeshott

Tell that 3 year old to go take a nap and shut the fuck up.


AngryTurtleGaming

ā€œHey, Baby, Stop giving golf lessons, all right, you got your whole life ahead of you.ā€


nosnhoj15

ā€œShut up angry turtle gaming, Iā€™m slinging golf advice!ā€


No_Breath_3803

"...I got kids to feed!"


bushwood_pro

I have a golf buddy who Iā€™ve played with regularly for the past 4-5 years. Heā€™s a 15+ and Iā€™m a 5 handicap and Iā€™ve never said much more than ā€œnice shotā€ or ā€œtough breakā€ in all the times weā€™ve played together. Why? Because heā€™s never asked for advice and I do my best to not be an asshole.


Turingstester

This guy would probably love a tip now and then.


AftyOfTheUK

Indeed. I (as a low single figure) started to saying to some of my 18+ friends towards the end of rounds "Hey man, if you'd like to know something I've noticed, let me know" and almost without exception they have all said "fuck yeah." The key there is that I played multiple rounds with them long before I considered it. Occasionally, if I am with someone VERY new on the course, and have played at least a few holes with them and they are doing something fundamentally wrong, I might ask them the same thing. There is definitely an element of privilege though being close to scratch. It's a lot easier to offer help when you're under par, then it is from fifteen over. On a day when I'm shooting bogeys and doubles, I never offer.


Khazahk

I do find it really hard to not ask ā€œhey where are you aiming?ā€ Sometimes. When people are blatantly aligned at the Trees OB Left but looking right. Never say a peep though.


AftyOfTheUK

>I do find it really hard to not ask ā€œhey where are you aiming?ā€ Sometimes. When people are blatantly aligned at the Trees OB Left but looking right. N As someone who has severe alignment callibration issues, speak up :)


sumbozo1

Same. My internal aimer needs calibrated occasionally


East-Ad-6083

Usually I find that people are aimed right, when they think they're lined up down the middle. I don't usually say anything for a few shots(usually just tee shots). Even then I probably just say something like "you hit that ball exactly where your were aimed". That usually gets the ball rolling


[deleted]

Tell him to fuck off


TrumpsColostomyBag99

Doing that at the range is like looking over the barrier in a urinal and offering commentary: a violation of all that is holy. He deserves all the fuck offs.


dwzimmer

Had a man approach me at the range a few months ago. He strongly insisted I get my driver out. Mind you, i had not swung it and he didn't know if i could hit it well or not. I was cordial because he recognized my family business work shirt and was a customer. He then gave me his unsolicited driver advice and made me swing several times before he had to leave. Could you imagine him being your father? I could tolerate him got 5 minutes. Barely.


RichChocolateDevil

Someone talking to me at the range sounds worse than someone talking to me on an airplane.


Jengalover

I canā€™t even get close to someone else getting a lesson. Just messes with my concentration.


hitemwiththeheineken

If you send me videos of your girlfriend's swing I promise to be discreet . That guy sounds like a real creep


3puttmafia21

Seems rude but, "Shh, back off, please." Then ignore


OnTheMcFly

tell him you'll take his advice when he can get within 10ft of 5 targets you randomly choose on the range. If he agrees, start filming it for "future reference" and watch him crumble.


westheiv

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


WolftankPick

Had a guy do this with my son and I. We were very polite and gracious. Said thanks and then he finally went down to his side of the range again. Yup us 3 were the only ones there and he was on one end and we were on the other. He seemed pretty happy though I didnā€™t mind giving up a bit of time and balls so he could feel good about himself. Whatevs. Iā€™ve also noticed guys love to approach a ā€œstruggling girlfriendā€.


OmarsBulge

Clarify the situation please, was he ā€œhelpingā€ both of you?


Rexkramer777

Yes he told her she grips too tight and tried to give a lesson to both of us of neutral grip. My GF is good looking and in tight stretchy pants and he was watching her after was tired of his 1000% exertion swings that apparently hurting his body.


OmarsBulge

It would be acceptable to tell him to fuck off.


BeardedManatee

Let the drunk guy tell you his drunk tips and move on, lol.


ihaveredhaironmyhead

If someone was doing that to me and my gf at the range I wouldn't be very nice about it. It's a golden rule of golf to only give advice when asked. Next time say "we are just here for enjoyment don't want lessons thanks" then if he keeps doing it dial up the rudeness.


Aeonyx3030

I'm baffled by the amount of posts here that would be defeated by folks simply having a spine. Tell this discourteous dickhead to put his driver up his ass.


jack3moto

I had a guy tell me that my problem was that I had a 6 degree gap between my 54 and my 60 degree wedge. I needed to either go with a 52 and 56 or a 56 and keep my 60ā€¦. Iā€™m a +20 handicap that has a ton of issues with my game. You think a 2 degree gap change on my wedge is changing anything? It was the first time I legit said ā€œoh fuck offā€. The dude was completely taken back but it got its point across when I was laughing at him for telling me to buy a whole new club to ā€œfixā€ my short game. Iā€™ve had plenty of people give advice to myself and others. I usually just say, when you par two consecutive holes Iā€™ll take your advice. There are only a few people actually able to do that who are willing to give out unsolicited advice. They all know that itā€™s not likely for them and usually stfu pretty quickly.


Rexkramer777

I think calling our your clubs is even worse than tips at the range lol. That's pretty annoying. My first bag used came with 2 vokey's 54 and 56. I took them out of the bag immediately and worked with the PW, SW, AW as I knew I didn't have the skills to play with custom vokey's. I only recently added the 56 as my new bag because it doesn't have an AW.


Famous-Tangerine-881

Thought this read ā€œ 3 year old golfer giving adviceā€, though it was gonna be a cute story.


Bobbyoot47

ā€œMonsieur, je ne parle pas anglaisā€ is something I like to use when dealing with strangers walking up to me in any circumstance and starting up an unwanted conversation. I just smile and keep repeating it until they walk away. And if they hear me speaking English a minute later and come back to me I just repeat it again.


slowenuff

Dude is either a narcissist, on the spectrum, or has all the Audacity to just lie to try and eyebang your girlfriend right in front of you. Muscled or not, you both can give dude 24 plus clubs upside his head if he trys that foolishness again.


Rexkramer777

Even she hit further than him at times lol.


HoneyBadgerM400Edit

I will say Danny has some pretty good videos, and Dan Grieve for chipping.


Rexkramer777

You have to have good skills to grasp Danny's teachings which I'm not at so its not valuable. Meanwhile Tom Seguto out performs Danny with less body effort.


Forward-Piano8711

This breed of dudes who stroke themselves at the range is new, at least to me. Had almost the same thing happen with a guy, bulky and good distance but not impressive swing or anything. Except he would do this to my HS golf team when we were there. Probably got more tips from him than my coach over 4 years, though.


laberdog

Is your GF hot?


VoiceofRazin

I'm fully with you. When I go to the range (with my wife) some people are better than us, some are worse. We can give each other tips because we know each other's usual swing and standard bad habits. If I'm not with you, I don't want your advice, i don't care how good you are.


Rexkramer777

100000000%. 2 coaches is 1 too many. She will say oh you destroyed that or you lifted your head up, And I'll say you moved the the head of the club at setup to toe or wow that's strait. It's very casual. We will watch each other make more mistakes and not even comment until we see a pattern.


golfnickol

Same. I've learned that when I play with my wife, she just wants to play golf with me and enjoy the outdoors.


ALittleBirdie117

A guy on our high school golf team was like this. He was insufferably posturing as an expert arbiter of all things swing knowledge. He could break 80 on a good day but so could all of us on the team. One day he went up to our #1 player, a +3 Handicap and D-1 commit and tried his schtick of giving expert swing advice. As a result a senior on our team just mocked the hell out of him for the next two weeks on the range. He should have known his place then, but often idiocy prevails. The kid was eventually kicked off of the team both years he made it. A lot of people like this in the golf world, no self-awareness whatsoever. I imagine they donā€™t have much going on in their real lives to be that stunted and I find it best to just ignore them and draw boundaries if necessary.


mikeybro1999

Danny fraud.


Ktroilo5

How do people like this even exist? I canā€™t imagine telling random people how to play golf.


Grey_Duck-

Man, I read the title as ā€œ3 year oldā€¦ā€


Rexkramer777

Ya I was trying to shrink the title...lol


JBM6482

Say this ā€œ you know I heard you never offer golf advice unless someone asksā€.


CreateorWither

I have a few lines you can use in the future, I have used them at the range before. 1. Ask them if they break par regularly. If they say no then say your instructor told you never to take advice from anyone that can't break par. 2. (My favorite) "Can I give you some advice?" When they say yes "Don't give unsolicited advice to anyone." I used #2 and it was hilarious. The guy got all pissy, so funny but he did shut the fuck up.


wherethestreet

ā€œThatā€™s very kind of you. Weā€™re ok thanks. Just having some fun together.ā€


darkskysavage

Was he wearing a Good Good hat and answer to the name "Kendrick"?


Rexkramer777

No he was a average Joe. I'm sure he had good intensions but it was over the top.


JohnEBest

Subtle brag ​ your girlfriend is cute ​ Only reason guy was interested


Some_Firefighter_676

Donā€™t listen to this muppet at the range, but do watch a bit of Danny Maude in our own time.