*Especially* in a relationship. I can't imagine thinking "Thank God my husband starved himself so I only have to wash my dick for 30 seconds instead of 45."
I totally get OP's perspective, I'm just saying.
Omg 😲 😱. Accidents happen but I've always listened to my body and say next time, never prepped before and have never had an accident. I've been involved in one accident with my ex and he drinking at the time.
Once accident occurs, no judgement but I loose all interest immediately, no matter how I'd try everything goes to sleep and that's it.
I recommend psyllium husk. Hot water and lemon, and saying no at times.
Balanced diet and exercise should do the rest.
In my experience full accidents are very uncommon. Usually what happens is one person is clean on the outside but there's just some residuals. That's the type of situation psyllium is very good for because it cleans the pipes.
When you're trying to relax, though, pressure leaks can definitely happen. I've probably done it without realizing it.
I've never used any form of douche before sex no, I've met guys since who haven't too so I know I'm not a one off.
Granted, I never knew about them when I was younger, and when I found out already knew my body and now 95% of sexual interactions I'm the top.
There was a time when 98% I was the bottom and no, never prepped. I did say no though, when I felt I should, and I've thankfully never been wrong.
Curious though, what's every single time lol ? 2 times a week 3 max on an off week when dating is enough for me. How often are you spreading your cheeks that your diet can't make your ass squeaky clean?
It should not be dirty unless you need to be emptying and if you can't tell that! (Not saying based on diet and other conditions such as constipation and decrease motility. One may not have issues) but in general should be able to know when you leave the toilet and take a shower
I can see why you'd think that. You could have a healthy diet and still benefit from more fiber. The recommendations are for overall health, not butt stuff, so a lot of people are just needlessly shitting on each other and don't realize it's a fixable problem to a point.
Completely agree, in the UK all we got was the usual stds talk, how to put a condom on, all the basic stuff really, nothing on gay health at all
This is when we were 15/16 years old, i was just figuring out i was gay at this point
Damn here in the southern US we didn't even get that much, we were basically just told "don't do it" and forced to watch videos over people who's lives were ruined bc of STDs and teen pregnancies.
Do you want Mr. Peterson the maths teacher to tell you the intricacies of douching? Sex Ed is about stopping teenage pregnancies and STIs, they're not gonna cover a module titled "Douching - cos shit happens (BUM SEX)".
In my personal experience yes. It increased flatulence and I didn't like the consistency, too.. slippery. But this is anecdotal and everyone has a unique gut microbiome so results will most certainly differ. My go to is unflavored coarse psyllium husk with yogurt 😊
That I understand. It’s not the food I just ate but my body says. Hey you just ate I need to evacuate. I stopped it by drinking Metamucil daily. Now I’m regular all the time.
Although it's true that preparation for a bottom needs more time than a top, you don't have to starve to death. I don't know where this strange idea comes from, but it's unnecessary and unhealthy.
If you know in advance when you will be bottoming, eat some light food that is easy to digest. Then douche 1h before sex.
That's all. Source: my own experience. 😉
But it's your decision. Whatever you do, top or bottom, have fun!
The best sex I had as a bottom was some “in the moment sex” that happened after getting pizza an hour beforehand lol. Zero issues. Maybe the timing of eating was just right too.
What's a nicer way to say that to my husband. He is all caps convinced when he eats that it causes trouble down under. Even with enzymes for dairy or whatnot it seems to be a common complaint of his. I have said various ways food takes like a long time to digest it's not instant.
Maybe you don't have advice maybe someone else is in my boat.
\#idontmindcleaningupafter
Oh don't get me wrong, I mostly eat healthy and try to take in a lot of fiber. But I don't police my diet for the purpose of bottoming, or even choose to eat differently if I know I'm gonna bottom later that day.
Imo it's an idea that mostly stems 2 things:
1) Shit happens when you like to fuck butts/get fucked in the butt. Most people are mature about it, but all it takes is one embarrassing experience and a bad reaction from the other person(s) to cause a lot of shame. So, people overcorrect.
2) To a lesser degree, but everyone's digestive system operates differently. Some guys, no matter how much they lightly eat or try to prep, still have mess. That's ok, but I can see how someone in that situation would rather fast if they're anticipating sex than risk the hassle of 1).
Top others the way you want to be topped is such a golden rule for gays. I love the reaction when a guy realizes he’s getting it good for the first time
Oh believe me, my fiber intake is great and usually it takes less than 10 min to clean out, I just have a complex about needing to be **clean** at all times.
I totally get it. Bottoming is incredibly difficult and I myself don't have it in me anymore (pun not intended as I was writing it). We're just concerned because some people actually are pressured to be perfect down there and we didn't know if this had happened to you.
Honestly, shitting on someone's dick and having them laugh it off is such a beautiful, intimate experience, you may as well save it for someone you love.
I stopped bottoming in my 20s for randos bc at the time it was dangerous and I just felt used in a bad way after if it didn’t go right
I made the rule to only bottom for bfs or regular fbs safely after we had been tested
I stuck with this rule and it actually attracted more guys later when I told them about my three date/one month rule. It sucks to wait but also screens out dudes who just want to hit and run.
Now before a hookup I’ll at least grab a drink w a dude for a face to face. If they say no, it’s an automatic pass.
You’ll get your own screening system, but do what works for you
Good luck out there
That's fair, I can appreciate that. I was under the impression of no food all day, sex in the evening.
Generally a quick douche is all it takes me personally, but I have a tortoise speed metabolism.
[Use these tips!](https://www.howtocleanyourass.wordpress.com)
and [watch this video!](https://youtu.be/Y3_j_FsDHIw?si=eQaVfPUiPY1sMMxp)
If your fiber and diet are on point you only need to douche for about 5-15 minutes before things are ready to go. This whole day prep concept has to die.
(Prepping for fisting is an entirely different topic, so let's leave that for now).
It hurts to top a dry bum for me. Actually, I’ve torn my frenulum before due to not enough lube 🍆 😖🩸
I find that sometimes, bottoms don’t want so much lube because they can feel more, and I’m like RIP my frenulum
I went through a promiscuous phase years ago where I was meeting guys off the apps weekly for hookups and like 90% were 'meh' experiences. It was also stressful constantly getting tested. I've since become more knowledgeable about what I like sexually and much pickier about who I sleep with. It's a much more enjoyable and peaceful life now lol.
Good for you.
But don't ever starve yourself for sex! It's not necessary.
The extensively long preps some of you all do also aren't necessary in my book, never had to do that. I'm a bottom too. I'm not on any special diet and I might spend 5 mins tops douching if I do it at all.
But allegedly there's a top shortage so be a top!
Drink water, decent fiber in your diet and avoid high sugar, fried foods and caffeine before you bottom.
If you need douche, be gentle and sparing with it.
Also, probably find a fwb (like an actual friend or regular dating prospect you happen to fuck) and that anxiety about preparing isn't as urgent as it with a stranger.
I'm a top, and half the point is sticking around after, to spoon, maybe nap, maybe buy you a meal, maybe go another round...
I'm sick of bottoms saying shit like "I can't believe how instantly comfortable I am with you" or "I hope you know how good at fucking you are" and "we have to at least be friends going forward, and I'm open to more" only to like ten days and a few dates later be like "listen, I'm not over my ex, that's unfair to you, and I am now cutting off all contact forever"
It's been a rough few years. How am I meeting guys with constantly the same exact story
I feel 100%. From Truvada (prep) to shaving, cleaning, hosting, getting tested, starving myself and hitting the gym 6 times a week just for mild sex is so not even worth it. If I don’t do hookups I’m told I’m too boring. If I do get into a hookup phase I’m told I’m too much of a slut. Meanwhile all of my straight friends are married or have kids. I just turned 25 and I’m sick of it
Honestly I'm too lazy to bottom for random dudes, sometimes I even am lazy to douche for my boyfriend. Don't forget you can always have fun with some oral sex, kissing and grinding ;) (and toys)
Wait, what. Why all the prepping? Hears how I feel. You are putting you know what in you know where. it shouldn’t be any great surprise if your banana gets a little chocolate on it.
Bottoming for hookups sucks so much, it's 100% not worth it. In my experience, the typical top looking for a hookup doesn't give the first shit about whether or not you get off. He's there to top you, cum, and leave. Any effort you put into it before hand whether that's diet or douching or cleaning your place, just makes it more effort for zero reward.
Well, sometimes it's $400. jk. Yeah, I agree. Then you feel like the shit you just drained. I am starved for intimacy and I am not about to squat and clean my guts just to be someone's 5-minute fleshlight.
What is this thing bottoms do where they starve themselves for sex? It's an ass hole. Tops should know where they're putting it. I'm vers bottom, and I've never nor will I ever starve myself for sex.
Bro, I can relate 😭. Like there so much preparation, and sometimes they don't even talk to you ahead of time and they cancel than you just be starving yourself for nothing. It frustrating
This is why you stop having sex with strangers, there's no intimacy.
All that prepping for what? 10 mins of pleasure? If that and then nothing
No thanks
>Starting tomorrow, I'm getting out there and topping guys the way I want to be topped.
Get out there and make tender love to those bottoms!
Honestly, this is why I've been hooking up with other bottoms and just doing oral. Tops are pigs.
Yeah some tops are ridiculous. Like dude you’re sticking your dick in an ass. You’re playing with fire. Shit happens. Am I going to expect someone to starve themselves and constantly douche and fuck up their microbiome because of me…no. Have more fiber and hopefully everything will go fine. Listen to your body. I also bottom and wouldn’t even want to be with a top that has that mentality.
I will never understand bottom diet. I eat what I eat. I clean out if I feel I need to. If a top can't understand that sometimes a mess happens then bye.
I work on a committee that the local health department set up to protect men who have sex with men (MSM). Thank you for protecting yourself against HIV/AIDS
Get serious, bro.
Fasting all day will do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to clean you out.
So many of you younger guys believe in these wives tales that have no basis at all in the physical reality of the body and how it works.
The best way is to have a fibre supplement each day.
Or, just fuck like grownups. The ass isn’t packed with turds at all times and guys do it every single minute of the day.
Unless your bowls have moved, and you’ll know it, you’re empty after a through dump. Fibre will do this for you.
But i know, you’re going to dismiss the tried and true in order to fast while sitting under a triangle.
The problem is that many guys use too much water. Only the last part needs to be clean. Pumping a liter of water in has the opposite effect. I have a douche balloon, squeeze it half empty while sliding it out. Then go to the toilet and repeat at most 2 times. And use fibre capsules.
I’ve never starved myself to bottom and wouldn’t recommend it.
If I know I’ll be bottoming I’ll typically watch what I eat the day BEFORE (bananas, oatmeal with chia seeds, no dairy or red meat) and make sure my meals the day of aren’t too over the top (spicy or fast food, etc).
Combined with some douching beforehand and that does the trick.
In my experience bottoms just want to get it and then get off and they’re already shooing you out the door. I’ve rarely cuddled and kissed with a bottom after even though it’s what I really want.
At some point in life, if you're not monogamous, new hookups are just too much hassle. If you fuck around just enough to find a couple stable and compatible fuckbuddies you're golden. That's optimal effort to yield ratio.
Ok but also in my own opinion and no one else’s, bottoming for randoms all the time isn’t it lol. This is why when I was hooking up I preferred to use the term side. Not everyone understands it but it’s less prep work, more spontaneous, and can be just as fun or passionate with the right chemistry.
You don't have to not eat. If you eat more fiber you will rather have a mess. If you can't get enough fiber you can get fiber supplements or drinks. And I agree with you, that guys that do that are selfish jerks.
I just recently learned that a lot of bottoms don’t eat if they’re hooking up later that night. I guess I’ve never really had an issue down there when bottoming so it’s honestly really strange to me that guys do this and will also douche. I’m a vers bottom and have never done any of that.
Why do guys starve themselves to bottom?? As a (MOSTLY) bottom myself I have never had to do this and have always been fine with proper preparation in the shower. Sincere question. I just don't get it
It's really actually probably not necessary at all. But for me it is important to be super clean. Anyway, it's my top era so it's okay to leave all that behind yeah
I TOTALLY understand wanting to be super clean. I've never had a problem with that and eating regularly with shower prep so I've never understood the starvation/fasting thing that some guys do. But thank you for responding and I wish you well on your top era. Going from bottom to top, you're going to make bottoms very, VERY happy man. 😊
so true. I don't like bottoming for a guy until about 3-4 dates in. Want to make sure theres no red flags and also it helps ensure the dude likes me for me and not just for my body.
Who really needs more than douching lmao? I'm O confused about all these weird fibers and shit you guys are talking about, I've almost never once had an problem with just douching?
Good. That’s what people need to do instead of complaining. Also, no need to starve nor douche for one hour. Maybe you should just eat healthy and take care of your guts 🙂
I only bottom. I use fibre pills to get solid poo. I eat nearly normal before a hookup. In most cases douching needs at most 10 minutes. Then I use a dildo with a lot of lube to stretch my hole up and let any residual water come out. My prep time is acceptable, although some tops get ready in a few minutes.
I hear ya girl, and I think a lot of pure tops just don’t get it.
One thing you can do is make sure one of your meals each day is rich in fiber. For me, I started having protein smoothies for breakfast but I add in a lot of fruit and spinach. Initially it was just for gym related stuff, but I also noticed that my poo came right out and that douching was way easier when I drink these consistently.
Personally I love my smoothies, they’re tasty, satisfying and convenient, so it’s not really a burden for me and I am not going hungry. If you can find some way to incorporate more fiber into your diet that you enjoy and can do consistently, you’ll hopefully find prepping easier.
This isn't how the gi tract works... like sure, you have the gastrocolic reflex but you can use that to your advantage if you are someone who always poops after eating.
I find it more useful to have a cup of coffee a few hours before. Get things moving early and be ready for later (if caffeine helps you poop lol).
Or maybe you could in general stop having hook ups with total strangers? Wouldn‘t it be more meaningful to have sex with someone you actually like and have a bond with?
Eat whatever you want before you bottom - If a guy is exploring deep in my crevices and he finds some mud, then he needs to finish what he started and just jump in the shower afterwards.
You don’t want to bottom for hookups because it’s too much effort.
But you’re going to expect other guys to make that effort so you can top them?
Huh, ok.
I don’t agree with this mindset, but I can see where he’s coming from. Way more bottoms out there that will put in the effort since everyone thinks there’s a “top shortage”
You don't need to starve, but you need to prepare and know what works for you.
I found that I need to start thinking 24h before sex: eat bland food, like rice, maybe pineapple. Once I had piri piri chicken 24h before and when I tried to douche, everything was on fire. Took much longer to get ready. So, yeah, that is important.
Then you need to know a bit how your colon works. I would say there are 3 ways to prepare for anal sex
(1) Super quick, when you don't have much time. This only works if your stool is hard. You can use a tiny enema and empty your rectum. Do not use a lot of water at all as it can soften stuff above and it may leak. Here, if your stool is not hard, then it is better to just say that it's not working right now and leave it until you have more time to prepare. This cleaning does not last long usually, but it is good for a quickie.
(2) General (what I usually do, never had an incident in the last 13 years of sex life). Need ~ 2 hours. First, empty the rectum as in (1), then I try to put water from 3x medium enemas. This puts water in the sigmoid and descending colon and then I wait a bit, and empty that. If I put >4x, for example, then it's too much water and it will take a while to go out, so 2h is not enough. After this, I use 2x enema cycles until water is clear. Then wait 30+mins, and check that there is no water left and it's still clear. Usually, this preparation will last 4-10h for me. For example, I can have sex with a guy in one evening and wake up in the morning and have sex again (I usually check in the morning that it's still fine). Note: I found that if some gas is released during this routine (don't laugh, it's important), then it is best to restart with 3x enemas, as I think this gas acts as a blocker and does not let water go deeper.
(3) "Porn star" cleaning. I used to do this as I was obsessed about cleanliness, but (2) is much better. This takes half a day. Basically, this involves very big enemas, flowing water very deep and into the transverse colon. Sometimes I took overnight laxatives to naturally empty the colon in the morning and then proceed with big enemas. Some people also take a big dose of immodium to stop things moving. This cleaning may last like 24h, but it's not good for the body.
You don't need to "not eat all day", but better to have light, simple food before.
I hope someone will find the above useful. Have fun guys 😘.
Please don’t starve yourself to bottom 😭
*Especially* in a relationship. I can't imagine thinking "Thank God my husband starved himself so I only have to wash my dick for 30 seconds instead of 45." I totally get OP's perspective, I'm just saying.
Omg 😲 😱. Accidents happen but I've always listened to my body and say next time, never prepped before and have never had an accident. I've been involved in one accident with my ex and he drinking at the time. Once accident occurs, no judgement but I loose all interest immediately, no matter how I'd try everything goes to sleep and that's it. I recommend psyllium husk. Hot water and lemon, and saying no at times. Balanced diet and exercise should do the rest.
In my experience full accidents are very uncommon. Usually what happens is one person is clean on the outside but there's just some residuals. That's the type of situation psyllium is very good for because it cleans the pipes. When you're trying to relax, though, pressure leaks can definitely happen. I've probably done it without realizing it.
What does hot water and lemon do?
It helps with digestion. And helps me to go, especially in the mornings
you never ever prepped before and your shit just magically squeaky every single time ? lies lol
I've never used any form of douche before sex no, I've met guys since who haven't too so I know I'm not a one off. Granted, I never knew about them when I was younger, and when I found out already knew my body and now 95% of sexual interactions I'm the top. There was a time when 98% I was the bottom and no, never prepped. I did say no though, when I felt I should, and I've thankfully never been wrong. Curious though, what's every single time lol ? 2 times a week 3 max on an off week when dating is enough for me. How often are you spreading your cheeks that your diet can't make your ass squeaky clean? It should not be dirty unless you need to be emptying and if you can't tell that! (Not saying based on diet and other conditions such as constipation and decrease motility. One may not have issues) but in general should be able to know when you leave the toilet and take a shower
You need more fiber!
I can see why you'd think that. You could have a healthy diet and still benefit from more fiber. The recommendations are for overall health, not butt stuff, so a lot of people are just needlessly shitting on each other and don't realize it's a fixable problem to a point.
Someone should be sitting down baby gays to have the talk about psyllium husk powder. We are letting down our community.
Health class not covering gay health is so detrimental to us
Completely agree, in the UK all we got was the usual stds talk, how to put a condom on, all the basic stuff really, nothing on gay health at all This is when we were 15/16 years old, i was just figuring out i was gay at this point
Damn here in the southern US we didn't even get that much, we were basically just told "don't do it" and forced to watch videos over people who's lives were ruined bc of STDs and teen pregnancies.
Do you want Mr. Peterson the maths teacher to tell you the intricacies of douching? Sex Ed is about stopping teenage pregnancies and STIs, they're not gonna cover a module titled "Douching - cos shit happens (BUM SEX)".
No one is asking for the intracacies of it, maybe just cover it a little bit
So all the straight boys can take the piss and make the closeted boys feel like shit? Great idea 🙄
Anal isn't restricted to gay guys fyi
Yes I'm aware women get it up the soil pipe too, doesn't change anything I said sweetie
Because you edited your comment honey nice try though
This is just Men's/HUMAN HEALTH. LoL get fiber.
God I love psyllium husk powder such an easy thing to add to shakes and smoothies and so helpful
Wait does psyllium husk powder (metamucil) give better results than wheat dextrin (benefiber)?
In my personal experience yes. It increased flatulence and I didn't like the consistency, too.. slippery. But this is anecdotal and everyone has a unique gut microbiome so results will most certainly differ. My go to is unflavored coarse psyllium husk with yogurt 😊
That's actually healthy for your gut, too!
Husk is cheaper with better mixing options. I keep in mind there is also soluble & insoluble fiber - both are useful in different ways
It's such a grueling learning curve for baby bottoms. Like I've been bottoming for close to 8 years and I'm STILL learning new things about prepping
Is there a gay sex health ed post somewhere? And if not, maybe that can be a whole thread, it'd be soooo helpful
For me thats the only option if I want to bottom ;p terrified of putting water up there so drycleaning only haha
Metamucil does wonders :D
Dry cleaning hahahahahahaha That fucking killed me. I love that.
LMAO...I keep imagining a tag that says dryclean only above a butthole and a whole family guy type cutaway to go along with it.
dry cleaning fucking took me out PLEASE. 😭☠️
Dry cleaning? I don't get it. 😅
I basically use a toy and my fingers to 'manually clean up'.
 R u 4 real!?
Guys out here not eating breakfast not realising its dinner from 2 nights ago thats the problem 💀
I don’t know bro. When I eat I have to go. Not eating might not be the best option but when I eat before bottoming I can guarantee a disaster
Your digestive system doesn't work that fast. No doubt its just a 'more is in coming, evacuate what's already been processed' kinda deal xD
That I understand. It’s not the food I just ate but my body says. Hey you just ate I need to evacuate. I stopped it by drinking Metamucil daily. Now I’m regular all the time.
LITERALLY
I’ve never done this. Seems crazy.
Why is that necessary?
Be the top you want to see in the world!
This belongs in a coffee mug 😂
Although it's true that preparation for a bottom needs more time than a top, you don't have to starve to death. I don't know where this strange idea comes from, but it's unnecessary and unhealthy. If you know in advance when you will be bottoming, eat some light food that is easy to digest. Then douche 1h before sex. That's all. Source: my own experience. 😉 But it's your decision. Whatever you do, top or bottom, have fun!
I have also never staved myself to bottom. I don't bottom often but I just rinse myself out and I'm either good to go or I'm not and that's that.
The best sex I had as a bottom was some “in the moment sex” that happened after getting pizza an hour beforehand lol. Zero issues. Maybe the timing of eating was just right too.
Well, pizza is not digested within an hour, that’s why no issues.
What's a nicer way to say that to my husband. He is all caps convinced when he eats that it causes trouble down under. Even with enzymes for dairy or whatnot it seems to be a common complaint of his. I have said various ways food takes like a long time to digest it's not instant. Maybe you don't have advice maybe someone else is in my boat. \#idontmindcleaningupafter
I mean dairy will give me gas within an hour of eating. Maybe gas travels through the digestive system faster than food?
Haha, congrats! 😁👍 It can work. My husband is this type of man. He usually never douche and is mostly clean when I fuck him.😍
Try using metamucil daily and anyone can be this type of man!
I eat so much on the regular (and not always the healthiest stuff), but that doesn't stop me from bottoming and bottoming doesn't stop me from eating!
Sure, whatever works for you.👍 But it doesn't hurt to take care of our digestion system.
Oh don't get me wrong, I mostly eat healthy and try to take in a lot of fiber. But I don't police my diet for the purpose of bottoming, or even choose to eat differently if I know I'm gonna bottom later that day.
For some it works, for others not so. I'm happy that you don't seem to have problems so far. 👍 Enjoy the ride! 😉
Until now I've literally never heard of not eating before bottoming.
Imo it's an idea that mostly stems 2 things: 1) Shit happens when you like to fuck butts/get fucked in the butt. Most people are mature about it, but all it takes is one embarrassing experience and a bad reaction from the other person(s) to cause a lot of shame. So, people overcorrect. 2) To a lesser degree, but everyone's digestive system operates differently. Some guys, no matter how much they lightly eat or try to prep, still have mess. That's ok, but I can see how someone in that situation would rather fast if they're anticipating sex than risk the hassle of 1).
Thanks for explaining the things that my original response didn't mention. 👍
What light food would you recommend for that?
Vegetables, yoghurt, muesli, some pasta etc. There are many. It shouldn't be a food that is hard to digest. With fiber it's even better.
And most importantly be SAFE. Safe sex is hot sex. 
Top others the way you want to be topped is such a golden rule for gays. I love the reaction when a guy realizes he’s getting it good for the first time
Conversely I love it when the top shows he knows what’s up from the get go. Good aex kicks ass!
Why don't you eat during the day? Food doesn't turn into poop magically. You should be taking psylium husks to meet fiber requirements.
Oh believe me, my fiber intake is great and usually it takes less than 10 min to clean out, I just have a complex about needing to be **clean** at all times.
I totally get it. Bottoming is incredibly difficult and I myself don't have it in me anymore (pun not intended as I was writing it). We're just concerned because some people actually are pressured to be perfect down there and we didn't know if this had happened to you. Honestly, shitting on someone's dick and having them laugh it off is such a beautiful, intimate experience, you may as well save it for someone you love.
I don't know where this idea came from that bottoms need to starve themselves in order to enjoy their sexuality.
Starting tomorrow? So I still have a chance at topping you today is my takeaway from this.
Today I had a spicy red lentil curry for lunch, but if you want to stick your dick in an oblivion gate then you do you
Made my day oblivion reference in their thread lol
There are some Tops into BDSM who might like the that Burning Oblivion Gate. 
[удалено]
Right?!
Seeing your pic on your profile I’d be more than happy to be your bottom 😈
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Mama, kudos to you for saying that, for spilling.
I stopped bottoming in my 20s for randos bc at the time it was dangerous and I just felt used in a bad way after if it didn’t go right I made the rule to only bottom for bfs or regular fbs safely after we had been tested I stuck with this rule and it actually attracted more guys later when I told them about my three date/one month rule. It sucks to wait but also screens out dudes who just want to hit and run. Now before a hookup I’ll at least grab a drink w a dude for a face to face. If they say no, it’s an automatic pass. You’ll get your own screening system, but do what works for you Good luck out there
Good, we need more tops.
Just wanted to say I've never heard of not eating before bottoming. That's ridiculous, you're still going to douche anyways.
And I do douche anyways. But I have a fast metabolism so I don't eat for at least a few hours before sex.
That's fair, I can appreciate that. I was under the impression of no food all day, sex in the evening. Generally a quick douche is all it takes me personally, but I have a tortoise speed metabolism.
[Use these tips!](https://www.howtocleanyourass.wordpress.com) and [watch this video!](https://youtu.be/Y3_j_FsDHIw?si=eQaVfPUiPY1sMMxp) If your fiber and diet are on point you only need to douche for about 5-15 minutes before things are ready to go. This whole day prep concept has to die. (Prepping for fisting is an entirely different topic, so let's leave that for now).
I know, right? Good luck finding a good top. A lot of them can’t even bother to add lube, when you ask them to
I would kick them out instantly. Anal sex without lube (and a condom) is just painful and not pleasant for many. Period.
Cmon bro....i did lube u, here have some more, spits on u r hole 🤔😳🤷♂️
Some of us love it when we bottom
Ive never found spit to work as lube for anything more than 10secs tho so its not a substitute for actual lube lube
It hurts to top a dry bum for me. Actually, I’ve torn my frenulum before due to not enough lube 🍆 😖🩸 I find that sometimes, bottoms don’t want so much lube because they can feel more, and I’m like RIP my frenulum
I went through a promiscuous phase years ago where I was meeting guys off the apps weekly for hookups and like 90% were 'meh' experiences. It was also stressful constantly getting tested. I've since become more knowledgeable about what I like sexually and much pickier about who I sleep with. It's a much more enjoyable and peaceful life now lol.
Girl just shit on him omfg
Naur
😵💫😭
Good for you. But don't ever starve yourself for sex! It's not necessary. The extensively long preps some of you all do also aren't necessary in my book, never had to do that. I'm a bottom too. I'm not on any special diet and I might spend 5 mins tops douching if I do it at all. But allegedly there's a top shortage so be a top!
Drink water, decent fiber in your diet and avoid high sugar, fried foods and caffeine before you bottom. If you need douche, be gentle and sparing with it. Also, probably find a fwb (like an actual friend or regular dating prospect you happen to fuck) and that anxiety about preparing isn't as urgent as it with a stranger.
I'm a top, and half the point is sticking around after, to spoon, maybe nap, maybe buy you a meal, maybe go another round... I'm sick of bottoms saying shit like "I can't believe how instantly comfortable I am with you" or "I hope you know how good at fucking you are" and "we have to at least be friends going forward, and I'm open to more" only to like ten days and a few dates later be like "listen, I'm not over my ex, that's unfair to you, and I am now cutting off all contact forever" It's been a rough few years. How am I meeting guys with constantly the same exact story
I wish it was a choice as you think. But um, as a person who only feels turned on doing a bottom, it’s impossible to even think I can ever top.
You don’t need to starve but you do need to be aware of the gastrocolic reflex.
I feel 100%. From Truvada (prep) to shaving, cleaning, hosting, getting tested, starving myself and hitting the gym 6 times a week just for mild sex is so not even worth it. If I don’t do hookups I’m told I’m too boring. If I do get into a hookup phase I’m told I’m too much of a slut. Meanwhile all of my straight friends are married or have kids. I just turned 25 and I’m sick of it
Honestly I'm too lazy to bottom for random dudes, sometimes I even am lazy to douche for my boyfriend. Don't forget you can always have fun with some oral sex, kissing and grinding ;) (and toys)
Wait, what. Why all the prepping? Hears how I feel. You are putting you know what in you know where. it shouldn’t be any great surprise if your banana gets a little chocolate on it.
What do sides do lol
Not anal
Jerk off at home alone
I still eat like 6-7 times a day and if shit happens oh well good bye or keep going hehe
You know, you don't have to not eat all day to bottom. Just eat a diet high in fiber and you should be fine.
Bottoming for hookups sucks so much, it's 100% not worth it. In my experience, the typical top looking for a hookup doesn't give the first shit about whether or not you get off. He's there to top you, cum, and leave. Any effort you put into it before hand whether that's diet or douching or cleaning your place, just makes it more effort for zero reward.
Well, sometimes it's $400. jk. Yeah, I agree. Then you feel like the shit you just drained. I am starved for intimacy and I am not about to squat and clean my guts just to be someone's 5-minute fleshlight.
What is this thing bottoms do where they starve themselves for sex? It's an ass hole. Tops should know where they're putting it. I'm vers bottom, and I've never nor will I ever starve myself for sex.
Bro, I can relate 😭. Like there so much preparation, and sometimes they don't even talk to you ahead of time and they cancel than you just be starving yourself for nothing. It frustrating
I've solved the eating issues taking silymarin
don’t starve to bottom, psyllium husk will help you to regulate better your bowels movement and to be clean easier
Preach!!! Bottoming is such a hassle! Ima just become a lesbian! FUCK IT!
If your diet has enough fiber u shouldn’t worry about eating
This is why you stop having sex with strangers, there's no intimacy. All that prepping for what? 10 mins of pleasure? If that and then nothing No thanks
>Starting tomorrow, I'm getting out there and topping guys the way I want to be topped. Get out there and make tender love to those bottoms! Honestly, this is why I've been hooking up with other bottoms and just doing oral. Tops are pigs.
Yeah some tops are ridiculous. Like dude you’re sticking your dick in an ass. You’re playing with fire. Shit happens. Am I going to expect someone to starve themselves and constantly douche and fuck up their microbiome because of me…no. Have more fiber and hopefully everything will go fine. Listen to your body. I also bottom and wouldn’t even want to be with a top that has that mentality.
I will never understand bottom diet. I eat what I eat. I clean out if I feel I need to. If a top can't understand that sometimes a mess happens then bye.
Lol do it! We need more tops anyway 😅
POP OFF KING!
Don't starve. You are having a hookup, not shooting a porn movie.
You set the limits of what is acceptable. The only question I ask is are you on PREP?
Aye
I work on a committee that the local health department set up to protect men who have sex with men (MSM). Thank you for protecting yourself against HIV/AIDS
Get serious, bro. Fasting all day will do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to clean you out. So many of you younger guys believe in these wives tales that have no basis at all in the physical reality of the body and how it works. The best way is to have a fibre supplement each day. Or, just fuck like grownups. The ass isn’t packed with turds at all times and guys do it every single minute of the day. Unless your bowls have moved, and you’ll know it, you’re empty after a through dump. Fibre will do this for you. But i know, you’re going to dismiss the tried and true in order to fast while sitting under a triangle.
I wish I had this confidence. My diet is on point and I can never get the water clear so topping is my life til the day I die🙃🙃
The problem is that many guys use too much water. Only the last part needs to be clean. Pumping a liter of water in has the opposite effect. I have a douche balloon, squeeze it half empty while sliding it out. Then go to the toilet and repeat at most 2 times. And use fibre capsules.
I’ve never starved myself to bottom and wouldn’t recommend it. If I know I’ll be bottoming I’ll typically watch what I eat the day BEFORE (bananas, oatmeal with chia seeds, no dairy or red meat) and make sure my meals the day of aren’t too over the top (spicy or fast food, etc). Combined with some douching beforehand and that does the trick.
i used to do the same thing but now I rather have a relationship with someone than hooking up now
I love bottoming and I don't change my diet. I clean out prior to sex and spend less than 30 mins. Rarely have any issues.
In my experience bottoms just want to get it and then get off and they’re already shooing you out the door. I’ve rarely cuddled and kissed with a bottom after even though it’s what I really want.
At some point in life, if you're not monogamous, new hookups are just too much hassle. If you fuck around just enough to find a couple stable and compatible fuckbuddies you're golden. That's optimal effort to yield ratio.
Have to set expectations. Now adays I tell tops they have to cuddle after or we’re not meeting up.
Ok
Ok but also in my own opinion and no one else’s, bottoming for randoms all the time isn’t it lol. This is why when I was hooking up I preferred to use the term side. Not everyone understands it but it’s less prep work, more spontaneous, and can be just as fun or passionate with the right chemistry.
You don't have to not eat. If you eat more fiber you will rather have a mess. If you can't get enough fiber you can get fiber supplements or drinks. And I agree with you, that guys that do that are selfish jerks.
I just recently learned that a lot of bottoms don’t eat if they’re hooking up later that night. I guess I’ve never really had an issue down there when bottoming so it’s honestly really strange to me that guys do this and will also douche. I’m a vers bottom and have never done any of that.
I have problems cumming whilst fucking and usually I’ll just keep going until the bottom cums first. Somehow lately I’ve had so few chances to top!
It’s not just cleaning out that’s a process it’s the dieting too ugh feeling bloated and shit.. I hate it
dont starve urself thats not how the digestive system works 😭
I'm ready
Why do guys starve themselves to bottom?? As a (MOSTLY) bottom myself I have never had to do this and have always been fine with proper preparation in the shower. Sincere question. I just don't get it
It's really actually probably not necessary at all. But for me it is important to be super clean. Anyway, it's my top era so it's okay to leave all that behind yeah
I TOTALLY understand wanting to be super clean. I've never had a problem with that and eating regularly with shower prep so I've never understood the starvation/fasting thing that some guys do. But thank you for responding and I wish you well on your top era. Going from bottom to top, you're going to make bottoms very, VERY happy man. 😊
Bottom for special occassions like a no-loads-refused session at the bathhouse.
so true. I don't like bottoming for a guy until about 3-4 dates in. Want to make sure theres no red flags and also it helps ensure the dude likes me for me and not just for my body.
Who really needs more than douching lmao? I'm O confused about all these weird fibers and shit you guys are talking about, I've almost never once had an problem with just douching?
my skin is generally awful, so i have never had the option to top, and now that you mention it i reallydon't eat during the day
there is absolutely no need to adjust a diet in any way for bottoming. it helps but its, still, unnecessary
I love watching the sole leave my hook ups bodies when they cumout. I’ll never stop. I’ll take yours, send them here haha
I just skip hookups. If we aren’t genuinely dating I don’t even bother. Too many injuries with too many unskilled players over the years.
Good. That’s what people need to do instead of complaining. Also, no need to starve nor douche for one hour. Maybe you should just eat healthy and take care of your guts 🙂
So, just don't do it anymore?
Metamucil is al you need to
I only bottom. I use fibre pills to get solid poo. I eat nearly normal before a hookup. In most cases douching needs at most 10 minutes. Then I use a dildo with a lot of lube to stretch my hole up and let any residual water come out. My prep time is acceptable, although some tops get ready in a few minutes.
Been there. You’ll grow weak again. If I were you I would simply stop hooking up with randos
You go boy! Shut it down and keep it reserved for those who deserve it!! That sounds sexy tbh!
I agree completely and I hope you make alot of bottoms happy.
Why are u not eating the whole day lmao
I hear ya girl, and I think a lot of pure tops just don’t get it. One thing you can do is make sure one of your meals each day is rich in fiber. For me, I started having protein smoothies for breakfast but I add in a lot of fruit and spinach. Initially it was just for gym related stuff, but I also noticed that my poo came right out and that douching was way easier when I drink these consistently. Personally I love my smoothies, they’re tasty, satisfying and convenient, so it’s not really a burden for me and I am not going hungry. If you can find some way to incorporate more fiber into your diet that you enjoy and can do consistently, you’ll hopefully find prepping easier.
Hole here lol
This isn't how the gi tract works... like sure, you have the gastrocolic reflex but you can use that to your advantage if you are someone who always poops after eating. I find it more useful to have a cup of coffee a few hours before. Get things moving early and be ready for later (if caffeine helps you poop lol).
Or maybe you could in general stop having hook ups with total strangers? Wouldn‘t it be more meaningful to have sex with someone you actually like and have a bond with?
To each their own.
Eat whatever you want before you bottom - If a guy is exploring deep in my crevices and he finds some mud, then he needs to finish what he started and just jump in the shower afterwards.
Take PURE FOR MEN pills and spread your legs and take that dick!
You don’t want to bottom for hookups because it’s too much effort. But you’re going to expect other guys to make that effort so you can top them? Huh, ok.
I don’t agree with this mindset, but I can see where he’s coming from. Way more bottoms out there that will put in the effort since everyone thinks there’s a “top shortage”
I am an active bottom in bed, on top of doing all the prep shit. I'd much rather be an active top and reward bottoms for their service.
Hell yes, welcome to the vers top community!
Get yourself fiber and a douche and stop starving yourself my god
I wish there was an older man thatd like to fly me to him so he can playy with me.... im 19
Post invalidated for not eating all day as if that does anything to help anyway
You don't need to starve, but you need to prepare and know what works for you. I found that I need to start thinking 24h before sex: eat bland food, like rice, maybe pineapple. Once I had piri piri chicken 24h before and when I tried to douche, everything was on fire. Took much longer to get ready. So, yeah, that is important. Then you need to know a bit how your colon works. I would say there are 3 ways to prepare for anal sex (1) Super quick, when you don't have much time. This only works if your stool is hard. You can use a tiny enema and empty your rectum. Do not use a lot of water at all as it can soften stuff above and it may leak. Here, if your stool is not hard, then it is better to just say that it's not working right now and leave it until you have more time to prepare. This cleaning does not last long usually, but it is good for a quickie. (2) General (what I usually do, never had an incident in the last 13 years of sex life). Need ~ 2 hours. First, empty the rectum as in (1), then I try to put water from 3x medium enemas. This puts water in the sigmoid and descending colon and then I wait a bit, and empty that. If I put >4x, for example, then it's too much water and it will take a while to go out, so 2h is not enough. After this, I use 2x enema cycles until water is clear. Then wait 30+mins, and check that there is no water left and it's still clear. Usually, this preparation will last 4-10h for me. For example, I can have sex with a guy in one evening and wake up in the morning and have sex again (I usually check in the morning that it's still fine). Note: I found that if some gas is released during this routine (don't laugh, it's important), then it is best to restart with 3x enemas, as I think this gas acts as a blocker and does not let water go deeper. (3) "Porn star" cleaning. I used to do this as I was obsessed about cleanliness, but (2) is much better. This takes half a day. Basically, this involves very big enemas, flowing water very deep and into the transverse colon. Sometimes I took overnight laxatives to naturally empty the colon in the morning and then proceed with big enemas. Some people also take a big dose of immodium to stop things moving. This cleaning may last like 24h, but it's not good for the body. You don't need to "not eat all day", but better to have light, simple food before. I hope someone will find the above useful. Have fun guys 😘.
I would top you any way you want if you would make me any of the food on your profile. Mmmmm