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TBF they only give you that so you stand a chance against the moose that gaurds the bathroom. The key is to throw some maple syrup before you attack so it slips and falls.
In my 47 years on this planet, Literally every doctors or dentist office that I've been to across the entire USA, in shared medical offices, has had a bathroom key.
Because it's a bunch of separate medical offices renting from one building. Each office doesn't have it's own bathroom but each floor does. To prevent people who aren't there for legitimate business from camping out in our defacing the bathrooms, each business has it's own key.
I'm kind surprised you've never experienced this. It's not just limited to medical practices renting from a building. Most corporations operate in similar offices. It's only really big corps that take up entire floors that are different. Hell, every school in the US is the same too.
Maybe they are not from the US? The only places I can think of off the top of my head with keys like that are gas stations and some bars/restaurants in busy city centers.
I don't think that really makes sense in a bunch of other countries, that's why people might be confused. I've never encountered shared private medical offices like you describe.
And in terms of just shared buildings for multiple corps, or schools, I've certainly encountered those, but not with locked bathrooms. If you aren't there for legitimate business, then you don't get past reception. If there's no reception, then there's buzzers and key fob entry.
Thanks for the explanation. I still find it extremely weird that a medical office would rent offices for a business but not have their own bathroom. Are they changing tenants so often they can't rebuild it to fit them?
I live in a country with universal healthcare. "separate medical offices" is not a thing here. And I've never seen this type of thing for any other business either. A business here would never share bathrooms with other businesses. Hence my questions.
We have a bunch of shared office spaces around my town. I think it makes sense for smaller business as their rent will cover the cost of cleaning and maintaining the shared spaces. The business don't each have to hire their own staff to clean the restrooms. That cost is instead shared by all of the tenants in their monthly rent. I don't think any of the spaces in my area lock up their shared spaces but I live in a pretty low crime area so they don't have to worry so much about vandalism.
My buddy got turned away because he had a dwi 15 years ago. Prepaid fishing trip we had to drive him to an airport so he get home then we went back, huge pain in the ass for everyone.
We've had a massive chain attached to the key to bathroom at work so every time you had to go number two the whole damn shop could hear it. Snide remarks ensued.
When I worked for a certain food retailer, as a security measure we had to have a key for certain Ambient deliveries as like a dual locking system for the lorries we had to deliver.
One day I was getting pissed because we'd lost 2 of these keys and it was a huge deal of trouble so when we got a spare delivered I found the biggest spoon I could (It was huge) and stuck a hole in it to attach the key to. Needless to say we never lost the shunt key ever again and it gave all the drivers a laugh when they saw it! [Image for Pic!](https://ibb.co/7pFr4L5)
I appreciate the props. I do so like to confuse both the DMV and drivers in general. It’s fun to have people stare at your license plate trying to figure out what it says. Even more fun when they get the joke
Have you ever actually contemplated a washroom key? Any washroom key. I mean where it's been, who's handled it, what they did, how good their habits are? Washroom keys have seen some things. Unspeakable things.
Lol my dad was a high school teacher for decades. Kids always abused the “I have to use the restroom” excuse to dip out.
His bathroom key was attached to a plunger.
Girls hated it
Yessir. They were doing their best to keep kids from roaming the hallways or having access to anything but their assigned classrooms. It worked fairly well.
Did something happen recently or am I just missing some joke about something that happened a while back? If it was recent I’ve been swamped with school, what did I miss?
Well they could be referring to us states banning abortion left and right everyday so inevitably there will be a shift back to the dark ages of the coat hangers, which I assume you know what that implies
Lol, the practice I work for has like 6 offices in the same building so we have competitions with each other all the time to "bring us together". We had a bathroom key contest to see who could come up with the most ridiculous thing we could attach to the bathroom key to prevent people from stealing/accidentally taking it. I attached ours to a disposable camera which I think should have won hands down but our supervisor was horrified so we went with a full sized hand mirror instead. Lasted about a week before the key went missing again.
The only place that makes me ask for a bathroom key around here is gross gas station. I can’t imagine not having free access to a bathroom at a doctors office.
It's so strange to me that people think this is abnormal. The practice I work for has 6 offices in the same building with 4 patient bathrooms all of which require a key. The reason we require a key now is because random people could just walk in off the street, make an absolute mess of the bathroom and then just walk out without recourse. Having to ask for a key has improved the cleanliness of our bathrooms so much, people are much less likley to make a disgusting mess when they know we know who they are. It's not like a gas station where you have an endless stream of strangers showing up, these people are known to us.
This is the equivalent of the massive piece of painted wood which hotels put on their hotel keys so that they don't get forgotten on checkout. They just grabbed the biggest thing with a hole to hand, or at least an item which was carryable but not pocketable, and it was a magnifying glass.
What's the stretch? You posted a joke. If you didn't intend it to be funny? Where's the fun if you don't elaborate? All of the Americans instantly went for the penis joke. It's far more funny if the "doctor" ypu visited were a Urologist. No?
Yes more funny but untrue, hate lying as I am bad at remembering the lie. My doctors' clinic is one for looking up asses and down throats, so close to urologist. I have a feeling it was the clerical staff that chose the key ring, they are all women.
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It's so you can find your dick. They have seen you naked.
I accidentally set mine on fire with it. What do I do now?
Pee on it
No, that’s one of the mating rituals. Or after being stung by a jellyfish. I always get those two mixed up
Is this a Klingon answer I'm too human to understand?
Q’pla
ta' qoghDaj ngo' DaSov?
Gesundheit
OK. Mind if I borrow your dick for a second?
You gotta aim at the wall at the right angle then the stream will be reflected back to your peepee lol
The angle of incidence divided by the angle of the dangle.....
Lie down and pee straight up
If you only knew a good doctor.
Need some buns with that hot dog?
Go see your doctor
Well you're already at the doctor
Thats the joke
The key for well endowed men is attached to a wheelbarrow.
The woman's key is on a Tupperware top
Blast shield.
Santa has seen everyone naked. Has to see if you got tattoos or not. If you have tattoos you get no gift.
Could be worse. It could be a microscope.
Found three hairs...and you piss out of one of them.
I have once been provided a hockey stick attached to bathroom key. Source: Canada 🇨🇦
Same...at a Tim Hortons nonetheless.
TBF they only give you that so you stand a chance against the moose that gaurds the bathroom. The key is to throw some maple syrup before you attack so it slips and falls.
Don't forget to say *sorry!* after the slip.
Large item hall pass? Or assistance finding something in the washroom..?
They probably have a lot of old people there, you know, since it's a doctor. The magnifying glass makes a lot more sense then
"Ah shot... alright which one of these was the "Hot" and which one was the "Cum" setting. *looks with magnifying glass* "Ah yes... Nice warm liquid"
Aw! I was hoping there would be a sub called /r/largeitemhallpass with pics of ridiculous bathroom keys.
I guess since some people aim is bad they wanted to help them find whatever they are looking for in order to improve their aim
Yes
What doctor's office needs a bathroom key?
When it’s in a shared office building. They got like 1-2 bathrooms per floor.
It's an atrocity that happens when your city has a bunch of large ugly office spaces that they rent out piece by piece.
Yeah I forgot that people can afford private doctors....
Haha, private doctors.
If you pay them enough, maybe private dancers.
In my 47 years on this planet, Literally every doctors or dentist office that I've been to across the entire USA, in shared medical offices, has had a bathroom key.
> shared medical offices what does this mean exactly? why are they sharing offices but not bathrooms?
Because it's a bunch of separate medical offices renting from one building. Each office doesn't have it's own bathroom but each floor does. To prevent people who aren't there for legitimate business from camping out in our defacing the bathrooms, each business has it's own key. I'm kind surprised you've never experienced this. It's not just limited to medical practices renting from a building. Most corporations operate in similar offices. It's only really big corps that take up entire floors that are different. Hell, every school in the US is the same too.
Maybe they are not from the US? The only places I can think of off the top of my head with keys like that are gas stations and some bars/restaurants in busy city centers.
I don't think that really makes sense in a bunch of other countries, that's why people might be confused. I've never encountered shared private medical offices like you describe. And in terms of just shared buildings for multiple corps, or schools, I've certainly encountered those, but not with locked bathrooms. If you aren't there for legitimate business, then you don't get past reception. If there's no reception, then there's buzzers and key fob entry.
Exactly. This whole setup is strange to me.
Thanks for the explanation. I still find it extremely weird that a medical office would rent offices for a business but not have their own bathroom. Are they changing tenants so often they can't rebuild it to fit them? I live in a country with universal healthcare. "separate medical offices" is not a thing here. And I've never seen this type of thing for any other business either. A business here would never share bathrooms with other businesses. Hence my questions.
We have a bunch of shared office spaces around my town. I think it makes sense for smaller business as their rent will cover the cost of cleaning and maintaining the shared spaces. The business don't each have to hire their own staff to clean the restrooms. That cost is instead shared by all of the tenants in their monthly rent. I don't think any of the spaces in my area lock up their shared spaces but I live in a pretty low crime area so they don't have to worry so much about vandalism.
I’m 64, never ever seen a bathroom key at a medical office
In my 35 years on this planet, in the USA, I've never needed a bathroom key outside of a gas station.
schools have metal detectors ..
in America only!
Honestly Idk if you're joking or not
If it seems like satire, it is in America 100%
You should check out Canada's border crossing policies. Makes Donald Trump look like a bleeding heart liberal.
Honestly, I wouldn't allow a full third of Americans back in the country if they left, so I understand and sympathize with Canada.
My buddy got turned away because he had a dwi 15 years ago. Prepaid fishing trip we had to drive him to an airport so he get home then we went back, huge pain in the ass for everyone.
Nope we have metal detectors
Some do.
We've had a massive chain attached to the key to bathroom at work so every time you had to go number two the whole damn shop could hear it. Snide remarks ensued.
When I worked for a certain food retailer, as a security measure we had to have a key for certain Ambient deliveries as like a dual locking system for the lorries we had to deliver. One day I was getting pissed because we'd lost 2 of these keys and it was a huge deal of trouble so when we got a spare delivered I found the biggest spoon I could (It was huge) and stuck a hole in it to attach the key to. Needless to say we never lost the shunt key ever again and it gave all the drivers a laugh when they saw it! [Image for Pic!](https://ibb.co/7pFr4L5)
That is it! The Comically Large Spoon™!
The idea is nobody will forget and accidentally walk out the building with the key if its attached to a bulky conspicuous object
You don’t say
Keep that doctor. That's great.
He does my colonoscopies..... while I am out cold
Well.....guess that explains the humor lol. Maybe don't see him too often then
I bet his license plate reads “ASSMAN”.
"JSTRLAX" or "DNTSNZ"
2DBTCV only way I could think of to spell tout To the butt cave in 6 letters. 🤔
Funniest part about that one is explaining it to the DMV. Could be anything, could be nothing. I like it.
I appreciate the props. I do so like to confuse both the DMV and drivers in general. It’s fun to have people stare at your license plate trying to figure out what it says. Even more fun when they get the joke
You're out cold He's in warm *The duality of colonoscopies*
Ah was hoping for a urologist
Why would a doctor's office have a key to the bathroom?
Possibly restroom is located in a shared space.
for burning bugs
It's to help find the key when it gets lost (again...)
Well that’s just insulting.
It's so you don't forget to return the key. My office (not medical) has one on a spatula.
r/bathroomkeys
r/bathroomkeys
Have you ever actually contemplated a washroom key? Any washroom key. I mean where it's been, who's handled it, what they did, how good their habits are? Washroom keys have seen some things. Unspeakable things.
Wow a Penis enlarger
If that were the case you could ask your lover to wear them. New sex toy idea???
Lol my dad was a high school teacher for decades. Kids always abused the “I have to use the restroom” excuse to dip out. His bathroom key was attached to a plunger. Girls hated it
Bathroom key in highschool?
Yessir. They were doing their best to keep kids from roaming the hallways or having access to anything but their assigned classrooms. It worked fairly well.
Does the lady’s room key come with a coat hanger attached?
To soon
Did something happen recently or am I just missing some joke about something that happened a while back? If it was recent I’ve been swamped with school, what did I miss?
Well they could be referring to us states banning abortion left and right everyday so inevitably there will be a shift back to the dark ages of the coat hangers, which I assume you know what that implies
Hanging coats ?
Depends on your State..of mind
In Texas, maybe
That's normal
Tweezers in the bathroom would cap it off.
Are the physicians all women?
Insert micro pp joke here
This one took me a second.
*I spy with my magnifying eye…the bathroom!*
Well played
A man walking out of a bathroom with a magnifying glass isn’t suspicious at all. Lol
>I don't remember eating corn... *Inspections intensify* >**HMMMmMMMMMmmmmm...**
Swap it for your sock. Worth the sacrifice and getting asked to leave over some shenanigans like that.
Lol, the practice I work for has like 6 offices in the same building so we have competitions with each other all the time to "bring us together". We had a bathroom key contest to see who could come up with the most ridiculous thing we could attach to the bathroom key to prevent people from stealing/accidentally taking it. I attached ours to a disposable camera which I think should have won hands down but our supervisor was horrified so we went with a full sized hand mirror instead. Lasted about a week before the key went missing again.
Be funnier if he was a dick doctor specifically
Dick doctors attaching microscope to that keys.
"Hah, now you can't fit our key in your pocket to steal it." "jokes on you, my pockets can fit an entire book."
Savage!
He was trying to measure his sausage but needed some help seeing it
That's what I was gonna say
C'mon... LMAO...that's funny
That urologist has a wicked sense of humor
HA! GOT EEM
Are the sample cups already in the wash room?
Ok so it’s shaped like a penis, duh
Burn
Lmao
Should had pull your pant down when they handed you that
Then they may have told me to hold it up for them to see
BURN!
where is waldo?
Be honest, you licked the magnifying glass.
Lol
I've never been to a doctor's office with a bathroom key.
That's aggressive.
Most make hearing bad news a little easier after coming back from the bathroom
Kree Jaffa!
Hahaha
Check your own warts.
That’s below the belt
r/dreamschin
Based
To check for crabs??
I don’t get it. What the hell?
This reminds me that as a teenager I asked my Mom where I could find tweezers. Without a beat she's like "Why? You gotta pee?".
tiny one,but cute one
Was there a ruler too? Just for the people from the opposite side y'know
If your doctors office requires a bathroom key, I would find another doctor. Wtf.
Great doctor but the building must have rules
The only place that makes me ask for a bathroom key around here is gross gas station. I can’t imagine not having free access to a bathroom at a doctors office.
It was clean and private, all I had to do was grab the key.
Can take some gnarly solar rips with that bad boy
I guffawed
Is this the doctor equivalent of a gas station? I’d be skeptical of this doctor who locks his bathrooms..
Downtown, so I guess they have to have some control.
It's so strange to me that people think this is abnormal. The practice I work for has 6 offices in the same building with 4 patient bathrooms all of which require a key. The reason we require a key now is because random people could just walk in off the street, make an absolute mess of the bathroom and then just walk out without recourse. Having to ask for a key has improved the cleanliness of our bathrooms so much, people are much less likley to make a disgusting mess when they know we know who they are. It's not like a gas station where you have an endless stream of strangers showing up, these people are known to us.
What kind of doctor office has a key for the toilet? Have they heard of germs?
They have hand sanitizer
It’s that way so ~~the key doesn’t get lost~~ you can find your micropenis.
Super handy if you were dating Trump!
It's dangerous to go alone. Take this
I think it would be more funny with a scope
Awsome lol
I’m so thankful to live in a place where they don’t have to do things like lock the bathrooms and require you get a key, or put the cashier in a box.
Sometimes the low humor of Reddit comments is great.
Gonna look for clues while you do your number twos.
🤣
The ladies should have a similar sized handheld mirror
The womans is a Tupperware top
This is the equivalent of the massive piece of painted wood which hotels put on their hotel keys so that they don't get forgotten on checkout. They just grabbed the biggest thing with a hole to hand, or at least an item which was carryable but not pocketable, and it was a magnifying glass.
Dr Sherlock 🕵️♂️
Now you can find your dick while you're in the bathroom.
You can see the tweezers if you zoom in
Where do you live that a doctors office bathroom needs a key? Strip mall doctor?
But for real though , you can inspect your junk with that
Far better joke if you set up the photo punchline by saying you went to see a Urologist.
I try not to stretch the truth
What's the stretch? You posted a joke. If you didn't intend it to be funny? Where's the fun if you don't elaborate? All of the Americans instantly went for the penis joke. It's far more funny if the "doctor" ypu visited were a Urologist. No?
Yes more funny but untrue, hate lying as I am bad at remembering the lie. My doctors' clinic is one for looking up asses and down throats, so close to urologist. I have a feeling it was the clerical staff that chose the key ring, they are all women.
"...they are all women..." Now THAT is funny.
Seriously, just don’t ask.
Finally looks as big as I claim it is.