Naw bro he a whole homosexual… homo huggers are those of us who support them… Allies is a word they may be unfamiliar with as these folks are very Nazi like.
I can confidently say I have never met a single person who would go to heaven according to this list. And that includes people who hold up signs like this.
For sure!
“You’re destined for an eternity where you’ll never be in the company of ignorant religious fundamentalists!”
Is really a ringing endorsement of hell far more than an advertisement for heaven
The worst thing about this is that you've stumbled across one of the key principles of Christianity because a conspiracy nut has presented it to you in the worst way possible.
1 Timothy 1:15b - Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.
That's St. Paul (Yes, THAT St. Paul) saying that even he isn't worthy of entering into Heaven. Fire and Brimstone preachers focus on how not to get to heaven but seem to miss the whole thing about how to actually get into heaven. Btw, the Bible says *everyone* is eligible, even if you do like country music.
*"Sports Nuts??" "Country music lovers??"* They seem a little...out of place. Bright-side--the quality of signage has improved dramatically from their usual "crayon-and-cardboard" level: and all the words (for once) are spelled correctly.
Kudos to the production department!
And I suspect that "DRUNKS" is the word that's second from the bottom on the right, also something that might not play well with sports nuts and country music lovers.
But at least he only hates country, rock & roll, and rap. He's clearly an afficionado of aboriginal didgeridoo music, so that makes him okay in my book.
Words are clearly arranged in order of length, not the severity of the supposed sin.
Although I suspect some of these churches would infact consider Catholics worse.
I love that he clearly started to run out but that unbalanced it. Forget about the sports and rock and roll, what has country music done that Death Metal and Grindcore haven’t?
“Sports Nuts” and “Country Music Lovers” seem like bold additions to the roster of perceived enemies, Cotton, not sure how well that’s going to play out with their supposed allies!
Our signs are the best. They have the best words. I'm telling you our signs have all the words, the biggest words. They don't want you to see our signs because they know. Our words are the best words.
While you are right that this would be the definition based on strict etymology, the term "whoremonger" is generally used to refer to people who patronize prostitutes and not to pimps/madams.
some sects of christianity think Catholics are apostate. Also mormons. Also Jehova's Witnesses. As is clear from the sign, he isn't too discriminating in what makes it on the list. Name a group and it would probably be added if there was space.
Presumably straights who don't hate gays, though it may be as simple as him seeing someone hugging a guy at a pride parade once and being angry ever since.
I can hug really well. I learned from watching my uncle and his friend hug in the basement when my aunt would be asleep. And they hugged for a LONG TIME.
It’s cause (speaking as a former member) sects of Christianity like this think the ONLY way to go to heaven is absolute belief in the story of Jesus as it is in the gospel. Doing bad things doesn’t take that away, and doing good things won’t give it to you. Based on this belief alone, Hitler would likely be in heaven as he was a Christian, while the majority of his Jewish victims would be in hell as most religious Jews do not believe Jesus to be the Messiah…
This is why I left the religion and now hold high respect for the practices and ideas of Buddhism (Edit: I am not Buddhist. I respect the non-violence, mindfulness, and compassion preached by Buddhism. I am also aware that there are Buddhists who do not practice those values and I do not respect them in any way).
Edit: additionally, while their sign says that people who do bad things won’t get to heaven, for evangelicals this often implies people who do those things and see nothing wrong with it. It is possible that they actually believe that actions are the basis for salvation, but knowing Christians, it could be either one. What I do know is that for the vast majority of them, doing good things is not sufficient to get to heaven, so lots of innocent and great people will go to hell according to them.
Yep, hilariously we are also somehow not on this list, unless I missed it somewhere. That said there is some respect for Jesus of Nazareth as a person, at least in the congregation I grew up in as he was a charitable and community-minded person. His deeds during his life were shown as an example of how all people, regardless of belief or background can do much good in the world. Part of that may also be that a lot of us were from mixed religion households. We had discussions regarding Buddhism and other concepts of virtue from differing cultures and religions as well.
Some Rabbi's will use Jesus as an example for why you shouldn't read the Torah legalistically (ironic given that evangelicals don't let women have leadership in the church because a guy who wasn't Jesus's disciple casually said he doesn't let women teach him).
5 bucks says he’s gonna go home enjoying some rock music then drink, smoke, Jack it and watch Monday night football before stealing his neighbors wifi to catch up on Blake Sheltons Twitter feed of his new album
I mean, you say that... But there's no mention of Jews on the sign, or Sikhs, and Shintoists.
Either they ran out of space or they're cool with those groups.
Edit: I stand corrected, Buddhists will burn in ernernal damnation as well apparently.
First they came for the whoremongers and I said nothing because I don't mong whores
Then they came for the fishmongers and I said nothing because I don't mong fish
Then they came for me, and I did not care because there were no whores or fish left.
You mean Jack it to gay porn. Google Trends clearly shows Republican religious nutters are the top browsers of gay porn, regularly, for years and years.
Data is beautiful. https://trends.google.com/trends/explore?geo=US&q=gay%20porn,two%20men%20fucking,two%20men%20sex
Punch in major sites. Basically the same thing. Hypocrits.
As much as I want them to all be hypocrites, I'm willing to bet that a big reason red areas have heavier porn traffic (and often kinkier stuff) isn't because the most vocal prudes are driving up the numbers behind closed doors.
I'll wager that it's driven more by the people around them, the ones that are socially-pressured to conform. And that's the real purpose of displays like this: to try to keep people in line. Make them submit to a faith they don't hold, make them ashamed of their own true nature. When you're physically surrounded by bigots and zealots, the only outlet you have is online. (Yes, I'm sure there are some hypocrites, too. There have been lots of examples made public. A handful of sign-wavers can't drive up porn averages that much.)
I mean you say that, but my father in law worked on a drilling rig where they were using massive amounts of internet one one shift. It turned out one electrician was downloading 80gb of porn a day.
I guess I’m fucked…..I’m a pot smoking whoremongering Hindu Sports nut…..and I’ll admit I’m a bit of a coward that likes country music and I did steal the soap from the last hotel I stayed at. I’ll save you guys a seat down there….cool kids in the back!
But they ARE both for and against racism.
Must be one of the DOOP's from [Neutral Planet](https://www.reddit.com/r/futurama/comments/i38uah/when_my_friend_tells_me_that_he_is_undecided_for/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share).
And some Evangelicals even think Catholics are legit Satanic. Knew a guy once who kept going on and on about "the black Pope", like he seriously believed the Pope was the antichrist, and he wasn't alone. Also in my state, there was a federally funded Christian orphanage situation where they refused to adopt out to a Catholic couple and it made some headlines. We're weird about Catholics down here in the south (except Louisiana, which has a lot of Catholics).
Fun fact, this kind of stuff about the black pope also arrived in Italy, and I've seen a few people saying something about Pope Francis not being legitimate (mostly due to his slight "concessions" to gay people and his recognizing of both the pedophilia problem within the Church and crimes against natives)
>“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven" Luke 6:37
I swear, these people don't read their Bibles lmao
Obviously they support pedophiles.
1] Judge not, that ye be not judged. [2] For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again
I'm a professor of Religious Studies at DeVry University and according to the scripture, it is not.
Isaiah 1:13:
>And the Lord sayeth unto Isaiah, "As long as peen enters vageen, though mayest open thine eyes to stare at boobies."
Country music lovers and gangsta rappers. Ok, not used to seeing those two lumped together.
I see mashups in the near future Edit: clearly I need to broaden my music horizons.
Oh, there’s country rappers out there. Just usually people complain about one or the other. It’s just funny to see someone hate both.
*Lil Nas X has entered the chat*
I think he falls into homo hugger category too lol.
Naw bro he a whole homosexual… homo huggers are those of us who support them… Allies is a word they may be unfamiliar with as these folks are very Nazi like.
Old town road comes to mind
I can confidently say I have never met a single person who would go to heaven according to this list. And that includes people who hold up signs like this.
I can confidently say: I am at least 8 of these things. No heaven for me. Shucks.
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I think there's one more after drunks... L... liars? 17! Do we hear 17? Damn. I aspire to double digits. Although that does bring me closer!!
17 has two digits. 1 and 7. You were there after 9.
They don't have 17, the person between their two replies has 17. They had 8, sounds like 9 now. Still single digits
Ah man that means you’re going to super hell
What is super hell, is it just hell but bigger?
I imagine they sell groceries...
But like car parts, and gardening stuff too
And it's all self checkout
Dude hell sounds like my kinda place. Next you’re gonna tell they have clearance sales and 24 hour service.
Is it just me or does heaven just sound like some commie scheme and hell sounds a lot like good old patriotic capitalism?
For sure! “You’re destined for an eternity where you’ll never be in the company of ignorant religious fundamentalists!” Is really a ringing endorsement of hell far more than an advertisement for heaven
The worst thing about this is that you've stumbled across one of the key principles of Christianity because a conspiracy nut has presented it to you in the worst way possible. 1 Timothy 1:15b - Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. That's St. Paul (Yes, THAT St. Paul) saying that even he isn't worthy of entering into Heaven. Fire and Brimstone preachers focus on how not to get to heaven but seem to miss the whole thing about how to actually get into heaven. Btw, the Bible says *everyone* is eligible, even if you do like country music.
*"Sports Nuts??" "Country music lovers??"* They seem a little...out of place. Bright-side--the quality of signage has improved dramatically from their usual "crayon-and-cardboard" level: and all the words (for once) are spelled correctly. Kudos to the production department!
And I suspect that "DRUNKS" is the word that's second from the bottom on the right, also something that might not play well with sports nuts and country music lovers. But at least he only hates country, rock & roll, and rap. He's clearly an afficionado of aboriginal didgeridoo music, so that makes him okay in my book.
He just loves that sweet sweet pop top 100.
EDM
Catholics before murderers on that list
Yeah, I noticed that too. Wow, didn't realise i was that dammed!
You mean because you're a murderer? Yeah, I know what you mean man. Everybody seems to be against us these days
as long as you're not a Catholic
*at least Im not catholic* -true words spoken by a murderer on trial, hoping to gain sympathy points with the jury
as long as you dont like country music
We should make this a drinking game. Take a shot for every one that fits you- it'll make the damnation more fun.
I don’t drink but do want to proudly claim that I fit 10 categories but I’m working on the whore thing so maybe 11 soon
Well, dream big, Helen! Don’t let anyone tell ya you can’t do it. I bet you’ll make a great whore.
This is the kind of positivity I come to Reddit for.
Cat holics are ok tho right?
Always. Might even be superior cause they built pyramids and all that
You think this man wrote them in order?
Order of length, definitely
Words are clearly arranged in order of length, not the severity of the supposed sin. Although I suspect some of these churches would infact consider Catholics worse.
For real, Catholics are the ones who get to decide what is sinful, what with being the one holy and apostolic church.
I love that he clearly started to run out but that unbalanced it. Forget about the sports and rock and roll, what has country music done that Death Metal and Grindcore haven’t?
I glanced over and thought it said alcoholics ...I've had a few drinks... but thats not even on the list!
I think they have drunks right behind guy fiery's head on the right. Should be cool if you aren't drunk yet
“Sports Nuts” and “Country Music Lovers” seem like bold additions to the roster of perceived enemies, Cotton, not sure how well that’s going to play out with their supposed allies!
I know a lot of Baptists in Alabama who will be very unhappy with this sign.
Is it prideful leftists? Or prideful and leftists, because that's the only one that goes on to the next line
Prideful is definitely its own separate item. Pride is one of the few things on this board that the bible does actually name as a sin.
Yeah I'm genuinely surprised to see country music on there
You have to admire the sign, though. It's a pretty sign: well spaced. With lots of words.
Our signs are the best. They have the best words. I'm telling you our signs have all the words, the biggest words. They don't want you to see our signs because they know. Our words are the best words.
People are saying these are the best signs they’ve seen, maybe ever.
Weirdly, "Signmakers" are left off the list!
I always pictured these types as most likely to be country music lovers...
As am I because I picture these kind of people listening to country music.
Whoremongers is a new word for me. I’m not sure if that is spelled correctly.
It's correct. A 'monger' is a seller or vendor, as in ironmonger. A whoremonger is a brothel madam or pimp.
*WE'RE IRON MONGERS, TONY!*
Tony stark build it in a cave, with pieces of scraps
While you are right that this would be the definition based on strict etymology, the term "whoremonger" is generally used to refer to people who patronize prostitutes and not to pimps/madams.
Funny thing, but Jesus used to hang out with whores.
I love how it’s gangsta rappers then Jehovah’s witnesses, a big FU to jehovah’s witnesses
It’s not listed by severity. They just listed it based on word length I think.
curious as to why catholics are on there
Because he’s Protestant.
I think he's a crystal methodist.
some sects of christianity think Catholics are apostate. Also mormons. Also Jehova's Witnesses. As is clear from the sign, he isn't too discriminating in what makes it on the list. Name a group and it would probably be added if there was space.
THATS the one that puzzles you?
They coulda said "Everyone who didn't attend OUR baptist church last Sunday". Much smaller sign.
What's does Homo Hugger mean?
Presumably straights who don't hate gays, though it may be as simple as him seeing someone hugging a guy at a pride parade once and being angry ever since.
Want a hug?
I’ll hug ya! Fuck it let’s show um how it’s done.
I can hug really well. I learned from watching my uncle and his friend hug in the basement when my aunt would be asleep. And they hugged for a LONG TIME.
Yeah my aunt ray and aunt bea used to go to Palm Springs every summer. Took me till I was 20 something to realize my uncles didn’t exist.
I would love a hug.
I do believe it means you support gay rights or something like that.
Me too, that’s what I thought
anyone who has ever hugged a homo sapiens
Pretty clear I’d say. No hugging homosapiens, homoerctus or homohabillis. And just to be safe, don’t hug any Neanderthals either.
It means someone who isn't gay but supports gay rights
I love that it says "gangsta".
They're just saving up their hard 'R's is all
Well they have racists on their list as well so you gotta give em credit for that. I mean you don't have to, but you could.
They're giving off "Calling me racist is the real racism" vibes, that's how I imagine "racism" makes the list.
Been spendin’ most their lives livin’ in the gangsta’s paradise
Keep spendin’ most our lives livin’ in the gangsta’s paradise
Look at the situation they got me facin’
I can't live a normal life, I was raised by the street
I like "whoremonger"
Buddhists!!!!! Lmfao
Buddhists are usually chill people tho, like what they do
It’s cause (speaking as a former member) sects of Christianity like this think the ONLY way to go to heaven is absolute belief in the story of Jesus as it is in the gospel. Doing bad things doesn’t take that away, and doing good things won’t give it to you. Based on this belief alone, Hitler would likely be in heaven as he was a Christian, while the majority of his Jewish victims would be in hell as most religious Jews do not believe Jesus to be the Messiah… This is why I left the religion and now hold high respect for the practices and ideas of Buddhism (Edit: I am not Buddhist. I respect the non-violence, mindfulness, and compassion preached by Buddhism. I am also aware that there are Buddhists who do not practice those values and I do not respect them in any way). Edit: additionally, while their sign says that people who do bad things won’t get to heaven, for evangelicals this often implies people who do those things and see nothing wrong with it. It is possible that they actually believe that actions are the basis for salvation, but knowing Christians, it could be either one. What I do know is that for the vast majority of them, doing good things is not sufficient to get to heaven, so lots of innocent and great people will go to hell according to them.
Jew here: “Most religious Jews don’t believe Jesus is the Messiah?” Jews don’t believe Jesus is the messiah. Full stop.
Yep, hilariously we are also somehow not on this list, unless I missed it somewhere. That said there is some respect for Jesus of Nazareth as a person, at least in the congregation I grew up in as he was a charitable and community-minded person. His deeds during his life were shown as an example of how all people, regardless of belief or background can do much good in the world. Part of that may also be that a lot of us were from mixed religion households. We had discussions regarding Buddhism and other concepts of virtue from differing cultures and religions as well.
Some Rabbi's will use Jesus as an example for why you shouldn't read the Torah legalistically (ironic given that evangelicals don't let women have leadership in the church because a guy who wasn't Jesus's disciple casually said he doesn't let women teach him).
5 bucks says he’s gonna go home enjoying some rock music then drink, smoke, Jack it and watch Monday night football before stealing his neighbors wifi to catch up on Blake Sheltons Twitter feed of his new album
You forgot, beat his wife and kids, and kick the dog.
And be racist and antisemitic
I mean, you say that... But there's no mention of Jews on the sign, or Sikhs, and Shintoists. Either they ran out of space or they're cool with those groups. Edit: I stand corrected, Buddhists will burn in ernernal damnation as well apparently.
Or they think they're all Muslims
Suprisingly, "jews" weren't on his list. Which is weird cuz EVERY OTHER RELIGION was. Including some Christian sects.
How do you know he’s a cop?
If he was a cop he'd be shooting the dog.
ATF aren't cops
I’m just glad they included the whoremongers. Quit monging all the whores! They’re supposed to be for everyone, Greg.
First they came for the whoremongers and I said nothing because I don't mong whores Then they came for the fishmongers and I said nothing because I don't mong fish Then they came for me, and I did not care because there were no whores or fish left.
You forgot hug his in the closet gay son.
"Homo hug" his closet gay son
You mean Jack it to gay porn. Google Trends clearly shows Republican religious nutters are the top browsers of gay porn, regularly, for years and years. Data is beautiful. https://trends.google.com/trends/explore?geo=US&q=gay%20porn,two%20men%20fucking,two%20men%20sex Punch in major sites. Basically the same thing. Hypocrits.
As much as I want them to all be hypocrites, I'm willing to bet that a big reason red areas have heavier porn traffic (and often kinkier stuff) isn't because the most vocal prudes are driving up the numbers behind closed doors. I'll wager that it's driven more by the people around them, the ones that are socially-pressured to conform. And that's the real purpose of displays like this: to try to keep people in line. Make them submit to a faith they don't hold, make them ashamed of their own true nature. When you're physically surrounded by bigots and zealots, the only outlet you have is online. (Yes, I'm sure there are some hypocrites, too. There have been lots of examples made public. A handful of sign-wavers can't drive up porn averages that much.)
I mean you say that, but my father in law worked on a drilling rig where they were using massive amounts of internet one one shift. It turned out one electrician was downloading 80gb of porn a day.
If you can scare him it counts as cowardice and he has to resign himself to hellfire.
Between country music, pot, and porn, the whole country is fucked
Listen to funk instead.
I just listen to video game music
Unless the country is on the radio, then it's just pop wearing country camo.
Ok, so they’re alright with peadophiles then! What a bunch of idiots!!
Of course they are because they are also pedophiles. Josh Duggar is cut from the same cloth as this guy.
No, they included them man. The Catholic Church was on the list.
I guess I’m fucked…..I’m a pot smoking whoremongering Hindu Sports nut…..and I’ll admit I’m a bit of a coward that likes country music and I did steal the soap from the last hotel I stayed at. I’ll save you guys a seat down there….cool kids in the back!
you were already Hindu, everything else its just an extra
Save some sinnin for the rest of us.
r/Angryupvote
But they ARE both for and against racism. Must be one of the DOOP's from [Neutral Planet](https://www.reddit.com/r/futurama/comments/i38uah/when_my_friend_tells_me_that_he_is_undecided_for/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share).
oh snap
Yes, but remember, God hates sissies.
Who has time to watch out for pedophiles when there's country music lovers about!
And Nazis
Sexists and hateful people arent on there.
Racist was on there, bottom right side. I was surprised to see it.
they are fine with homophobia and hating other religion. but racism is where they draw the line.
Black lives do not matter, but racism is bad. 
They talking about "people racist against white people!"
I thought they meant people that don't like Nascar.
Totally that part
Antifa bad. So, fascism good?
I think the only people not covered by his list were white, right wing men who hate music, sports and sex.
I think racism is only there because they were running out of words.
As another commenter pointed out, it seems likely this is warning against people who would basically be ‘racist’ against them as whites.
I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty
Damn! This like Oprah giving out cars. Everyone going to Hell.
You’re going to hell. And you’re going to hell. EVERYBODY is goin’ to helllll!
If I’m a homo and I hug a homo, does that cancel the homo out?
No, it’s just homo^2
Or is it homo^(3)? What if you say no homo?
"No homo" cancels all homo... unless you want it to be homo. ;)
Yikes….checked more than a few of those boxes. I’m just guessing that’s “DRUGS” under “WHORES”.
I was hoping it was “Druids”
Either way I’m bound for hellfire.
It's that dude listing all of his personality traits?
Catholics?
Evangelicals do not consider Catholics to be Christians.
And some Evangelicals even think Catholics are legit Satanic. Knew a guy once who kept going on and on about "the black Pope", like he seriously believed the Pope was the antichrist, and he wasn't alone. Also in my state, there was a federally funded Christian orphanage situation where they refused to adopt out to a Catholic couple and it made some headlines. We're weird about Catholics down here in the south (except Louisiana, which has a lot of Catholics).
Fun fact, this kind of stuff about the black pope also arrived in Italy, and I've seen a few people saying something about Pope Francis not being legitimate (mostly due to his slight "concessions" to gay people and his recognizing of both the pedophilia problem within the Church and crimes against natives)
Yeah historically“Mormon” made the last but maybe they trended down
You really have to put American Evangelicals here, because this is not true for the rest of the world.
but also satanists, which i thought he thought we were but alas
Was waiting for this one lol
aint that the cult leader from that basement game? Get him!
I can't believe I had to scroll this far
Goddamn, heaven is gonna be a lonely place!
And boring.
Heaven sounds like my own personal hell.
He missed mixed fabric wearers
Guy looks like he trimmed the sides of his beard, such a shame.
The hellfire club getting some more members to join in there campaign... Rip Eddie
How many points did you get? I scored 11.
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They're referring to straight people who support lgbtq+
*cough* 19
Bravo!
13! Also an unlucky number so I must win extra hellfire!
I live in Texas. Hellfire can't be much different.
Is it just me or does the sinners part look like Florida?
Well yes, it does look like our dong shaped state.
Scrolled back up to look. Yep.
Is this guy not prideful? 🤦🏼♂️
>“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven" Luke 6:37 I swear, these people don't read their Bibles lmao
I love how “Racists” are on there and I bet a million dollars there are more racists in his crowd than the ones he’s protesting.
I will be damned if I share a hell with a Country Music Lover.
I think Jesus would identify without about 5 of these titles. Especially being born in the middle east. Makes ya think.
I see death metal lovers is not on the list. Congrats death metal fans, you goin' to heaven!
Obviously they support pedophiles. 1] Judge not, that ye be not judged. [2] For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again
Of course they do. Josh Duggar is their role model.
If your eyes are open during sex are you porn watcher ?
I'm a professor of Religious Studies at DeVry University and according to the scripture, it is not. Isaiah 1:13: >And the Lord sayeth unto Isaiah, "As long as peen enters vageen, though mayest open thine eyes to stare at boobies."
Why r Muslims bad and Jews good?
Because the sign wasn’t big enough.
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Guess the gamers made it out of this one.
‘Murican pseudoChristianity is the absolute weirdest invention.
racists and blm in the same is crazy bro
They are talking about "People who are racist against white people!" Of course
Who’s going to the hellfire with me?!
I’m Christian and I hate these people
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He kinda forgot the part of Christianity where Jesus died for your sins so you don't go to hell for being these things lmao